^  PRINCETON,  N.  J.  ^ 

Presented    bT^oV^'^^X  \^(7\^oTi'vAK(2.  ^"ID.^) 

Division  ..?*?^^''^r^*-^ 
Section  .S^^=r'LJ (j 


I-V?-  fl.TTBitchja 


/ 


LIFE  IN^  JESUS: 

A  MEMOIR 

MRS.  MARY  WOSLOW,      ' 


ARRANGED   FROM   HER 


C0rr^spiihna,  §mh  ^tilr  fltougbts. 


BY  H5B   SON 

OCTAVIUS  WNSLOW,  D.  D., 

AUTHOR   OP 

'MTDNIGHT  HARMOflES,"  "PERSONAL   DECLENSION   AND   REVITAL,"  "THE   PRECIOUS 

THINGS   OF  GOD,"  ETC. 


"  lu  her  had  Nature  bounteously  combined 
The  tenderest  bosom  with  the  strongest  mind  ; 
I  view  the  Mother  and  the  Saint  in  one, 
And  pay  beyond  the  homage  of  a  Son." — KnigM. 

Her  children  arise  up,  and  call  her  blessed." — Prao.  xxxi.  28. 


NEW    YORK: 
ROBERT   CARTER   &    BROTHERS, 

No.    580    BEOADWAY. 
1860. 


EDWARD   O.    JENKINS, 

printer  &  Sterfotgper, 
No.  26  Frankfort  Street. 


PREFACE 


There  are  few  literary  tasks  more  delicate  in  conception, 
difficult  in  design,  or  responsible  in  execution,  than  that  of 
composing  a  parent's  life — that  parent  a  mother.  Under  ordi- 
nary circumstances,  to  portray  a  character  distinguished  for  its 
preeminent  excellence,  strongly  developed  in  some  of  its  essen- 
tial features,  and  remarkable  for  a  certain  idiosyncrasy  which 
assigns  to  it  a  place  in  the  portrait  gallery  peculiarly  and 
impressively  its  own,  would  impose  upon  the  delineator  the 
greatest  caution  ;  lest  the  imagination,  enamoured  of  its  study, 
should  be  allowed  unduly  to  control  the  judgment,  and  thereby 
an  ideal  rather  than  a  truthful  picture  should  be  the  result. 
But,  to  sketch  a  character  which,  from  childhood,  we  have 
filially  loved  and  venerated,  and,  in  later  life,  have  looked  upon 
with  a  deepening  admiration,  bordering  upon  a  feeling  of  re- 
ligious awe ; — a  character,  too,  sanctified  in  an  eminent  degree 
by  the  grace  of  God,  demands  the  possession  of  powers  to 
which  the  writer  can  prefer  but  a  feeble  claim.  A  mother  ! 
who  has  not  felt  the  exquisite  tenderness  of  her  love,  the  magic 
power  of  her  influence,  the  sacred  reverence  of  her  name  ? 
Has  she  weaknesses  ? — what  feeling  heart  could  unveil  them  ? 

(3) 


4  PREFACE. 

Has  she  virtues  ? — what  fihal  hand  can  paint  them  ?  And  yet 
the  holy  office  has  been  undertaken  of  perpetuating  a  mother's 
memory !  It  seemed  proper  that  some  individual  should 
weave  together  the  incidents  of  a  life  too  interesting  and  in- 
structive to  be  altogether  lost.  Who  so  fitted  for  the  -work,  as 
one  who  had  known  her  so  long,  and  had  known  her  so  well  ? 
The  absence  of  the  present  Memoir  from  the  biography  of  the 
Christian  church — imperfectly  as  its  materials  are  compiled — 
the  writer,  with  lowliness,  hesitates  not  to  say,  would  have 
been  a  real  and  serious  loss.  The  memorial  of  a  life  so  unre- 
servedly consecrated  to  God, — the  publication  of  a  correspon- 
dence, so  rich  in  Christian  experience,  and  replete  with  Chris- 
tion  comfort,  must,  with  God's  blessing,  be  greatly  and  exten- 
sively useful.  To  retain  and  perpetuate,  therefore,  something 
of  that  bright  spirit  that  has  passed  away,  and  which  itself 
could  not  be  retained, — to  catch  the  mantle  as  it  fell  in  its 
celestial  flight,  and  pass  it  down,  a  sacred  and  precious  heir- 
loom, to  the  Christian  church,  were  a  solemn  and  imperious 
duty,  from  which  no  conviction  of  inability  or  sense  of  unwor- 
thiness  should  be  allowed  to  shrink. 

There  were  difficulties  in  the  accomplishment  of  the  work, 
other  than  those  inseparable  from  its  peculiar  nature.  It  was 
found  impossible  to  give  that  fulness  to  the  biography,  that 
was  desired,  without  involving  allusion  to  the  living.  Per- 
sonal references  to  some  who  survive,— increasingly  to  feel  how 
irreparable  is  their  loss, — have  already  insinuated  themselves 
into  the  volume  to  a  greater  extent  and  more  prominently  than 
either  the  judgment  or  taste  of  the  compiler  approved.  They 
were,  however,  so  closely  interlaced  with  her  writings  as  to 


PREFACE.  5 

render  a  separation  difficult,  if  not  impossible,  without  essen- 
tially impairing  their  beauty  and  effect. 

The  destruction,  by  her  own  hands,  of  one  of  her  earliest 
and  most  important  private  journals,  together  with  a  large 
mass  of  letters  of  a  deeply  interesting  and  circumstantial  char- 
acter, deprives  the  work  of  that  completeness  of  consecutive 
and  incidental  history  which  the  editor  would  like  to  have 
preserved.  The  habit,  too,  of  not  dating  many  of  her  letters, 
and  jottings  in  her  diary,  would  greatly  have  embarrassed  the 
chronological  arrangement  of  the  matter,  (and  may  possibly 
have  done  so  to  some  shght  extent,)  but  or  the  events  them- 
selves, which  have  formed  tolerably  correct  landmarks,  guid- 
ing our  course  along  the  stream  of  her  life. 

Painfully  trying  to  his  feelings,  and  physically  exhausting, 
as  the  work  has  been,  it  is  not  without  some  regret  that  his 
task  is  concluded.  Not  only  has  he  counted  it  an  honour — 
the  least  in  his  father's  house — to  have  been  intrusted  with  an 
office  so  responsible  and  sacred,  but  the  prosecution  of  his  work 
has  conferred  a  happiness  hallowed  and  indescribable.  It  has 
been  to  him,  in  many  a  still  hour  of  night,  like  a  prolongation 
of  personal  communion  Avith  her  pure  and  glorified  spirit,  thus 
"preventing  the  feeling  of  entire  disruption,  and  forming  a 
kind  of  intermediate  stage  between  her  society  in  this  world 
and  the  everlasting  union  of  heaven." 

Acknowledgments  are  due  to  those  of  her  correspondents 
who  have  kindly  furnished  for  the  Memoir  letters  in  their  pos- 
session. It  has  been,  necessarily,  but  to  a  limited  extent  that 
the  compiler  has  been  able  to  avail  himself  of  these  invaluable 
treasures.     He  hopes,  however,  to  follow  the  present  volume 


6  PREFACE. 

with  a  second  one,  composed  entirely  of  selections  from  his 
mother's  unpublished  remains,  in  which  many  of  these  letters 
will  appear. 

The  work — already  and  solemnly  dedicated  to  the  Triune 
God — is  now  humbly  laid  at  the  feet  of  Christ's  one  church, 
with  the  fervent  prayer,  that  the  example  which  it  presents  of 
a  LIVING  FAITH,  and  of  a  Catholic  Christianity  may  in- 
struct, comfort,  and  animate  many  saints  in  their  Christian 
course ;  and  thus  bring  honour  and  praise  to  Him  whom,  liv- 
ing, it  was  her  supreme  delight  to  serve ;  and  whom,  though 
dead,  through  these  memorials,  she  still  may  glorify. 

"  Oh,  cherish'd  and  revered  !  fond  memory  well 
On  thee  with  sacred,  sad  delight  may  dwell ! 
So  pure,  80  blest  thy  life,  that  death  alone 
Could  make  more  perfect  happiness  thine  own. 
He  came  ;  thy  cup  of  joy,  serenely  bright, 
Full  to  the  last,  still  flow'd  in  cloudless  light ; 
He  came — an  angel,  bearing  from  on  high 
The  all  it  wanted, — Immortahty  I" — Mrs.  Hkmans. 

Leamington,  England. 


CONTENTS 


CHAPTER    I. 

PAGB 

Christianity  a  Spiritual  Life— The  Believer  a  Living  Soul— The  Prevalence  of 
Religious  Formalism — Archbishop  Leighton — The  Moral  Incentive  of  a  High 
Standard  —  Birth — Ancestry — Early  Training — A  Mother's  Influence  —  Mrs, 
Forbes — Providential  Preservations — First  Prayer — Marriage — The  Pilgrim 
Fathers— Military  Life— 11—21 

CHAPTER    II. 

The  Day-dawn  of  Grace— First  Convictions  of  Sin—"  The  Whole  Duty  of  Man  "— 
Residence  at  Romford— Removal  to  London — St.  James's  Chapel,  Pentonville 
—Rev.  Thomas  Sheppard— Spiritual  Distress— Xight  of  Weeping— Morning  of 
Joy— Full  Conversion — Writings  of  Rev.  John  Newton — Interesting  Stranger 
—Spiritual  Conflicts — Restored  Peace — Letter  to  her  Mother — Foreshadow- 
ings  of  Trial 22—31 

CHAPTER  III. 

The  Practical  Character  of  her  Religion— Family  Worship — ^Letter  to  her  Mother 
— ^Bermuda,  its  Salubrity,  Inhabitants,  Spiritual  Condition— Asylum  of  the 
Puritans — Andrew  Marvel — Whitfield  visits  Bermuda — His  successful  Labours 
— Dr.  George  Forbes — Her  Exertions  to  secure  a  Minister  for  Bermuda — Rev. 
George  Burder — Rev.  H.  H.  Cross — Chapel  opened  in  St.  George's — Remark- 
able Providence — Rev.  Duncan  Dunbar — Colonial  Slavery — Rescue  of  a  Slave 
Family— Manumits  her  Slaves — ^Providential  Escape — ^Illness  of  her  Husband 
— Dr.  Hamilton— Influence  of  Christian  Physicians— Religious  Anniversaries 
— William  Wilberforce,  Esq. — Her  Young  Family  ....        32 — 64 

CHAPTER    IV. 

God's  Adjustment  of  His  People  to  their  Position— Her  Illness— Captain  Winslow's 
Retirement  from  the  Army— Loss  of  Property— Her  Removal  to  America — 

(7) 


5  CONTENTS. 

Colonel  Bayard— Divie  Bethune — Her  Opinion  of  the  United  States — Death 
of  her  Infant  —  Death  of  her  Husband — Letters  to  her  Son — Inconsolable 
Grief — Light  in  Darkness — A  Remarkable  Dream — An  Especial  Promise — Her 
Baptism — Walks  of  Usefulness — A  Pious  Idiot— Conflict  of  Faith— Letter  to 
her  Son — Memorial  to  the  King— William  Wilberforce — Her  Communion  with 
God 55—79 

CHAPTER   Y. 

Revisits  England- Former  Scenes  —  Return  to  America  —  Residence  at  Mount 
Pleasant — Letter  to  her  Mother — Removal  to  New  York — The  Mothers'  Meet- 
ing—American Revivals — President  Edwards — ^The  Pilgrim  Fathers — Outpour- 
ing of  the  Spirit  on  her  Family— Letters  to  her  Children— Remarks  on  the 
Baptism  of  the  Holy  Ghost — On  Faith  and  Prayer — Resume  of  her  History — 
Touching  Letter  to  her  Son 80—89 

CHAPTER   VL 

Her  Second  Visit  to  England — Earnest  Letter  to  her  Children — Extracts  from 
her  Diary — Rev.  James  Harington  Evans— A  Remarkable  Providence — Heart- 
searchings— Death  of  George  IV. — Reflection  on  Christmas — Letter  to  her 
Mother — Letter  to  her  Son  R. — Letter  to  her  Son  H. — Rev.  Mr.  Evans'  Preach- 
ing-Thoughts in  Pentonville  Chapel— Interesting  Discovery — Letter  to  her 
Son — Spiritual  Fluctuations— Her  Birthdaj^- The  Necessity  of  Trials — Minis- 
terial Encouragements — Qualifications  of  a  Minister's  Wife  .        .        90 — 125 

CHAPTER   VII. 

Her  Fitness  for  Counsel  and  Comfort — Illness  and  Death  of  Mrs.  Evans — ^Visit  to 
Cambridge — Haslingfleld — Letter  to  her  Pastor — Rev.  Mr.  Carus— Diary — 
Rev.  Mr.  Melville — Letter  to  her  Son  Rev.  I.  D.  W.— Her  last  Visit  to  America 
— Ordination  of  her  Son — Diary— Revival  in  New  York — Return  to  England — 
Death  of  her  Mother — Tugby — ^Village  Scenes— Her  Prayers  for  the  Queen — 
Anecdote  of  the  Queen— Avoidance  of  Debt — Rev.  R.  Cecil— Memoir  of  Rev. 
Dr.  Payson — Letter  to  her  Son  Rev.  L  D.  W.,on  Ministerial  Work— Heart- 
searchings — Letter  to  her  Son  Rev.  G.  E.  W.,  on  Ministerial  Responsibility — 
Missionary  Memoir  of  Mrs.  Harriet  Winslow— A  Jewel  in  Mrs.  Harriet  Wins- 
low's  Crown 126—163 

CHAPTER   VIII. 

Her  Thoughts  on  Spiritual  Subjects — Communion  with  God — Dr.  Love — Letter  to 
her  Son  H.  J.  W.— Letter  to  her  Son  R.  F.  W.— Her  Thoughts  on  Prophetic 
Truth — Tlie  Second  Coming  of  the  Lord — Signs  of  the  Times— Puseyism — 
Gouds  Breaking— Parable  of  the  Pearl  of  Great  Price— God's  Dealings  in  His 
Leadings — Grateful  Recollections — Spiritual  Joy — The  Christian  Journey — 
Godly  Sincerity— On  Unholy  Jealousy— The  Unity  of  the  Spirit— Growth  in 


CONTENTS.  y 

PAGE 

Grace— Rev.  C.  G.  Finney— On  the  Conduct  of  a  Minister's  Wife— Parental  In- 
dulgence—Death of  her  Daughter-in-law— Nearness  to  God — Feelings  at  the 
Lord's  Supper— To  her  Son  in  Trial— To  her  Son  R.  F.  W.— Visit  to  Napton  164—190 

CHAPTER    IX. 

The  Christian's  Chequered  Life— Death  of  her  Son  H.— Letters  on  her  Bereave- 
ment— Diary — Letter  to  her  Daughter— Taplow — Reflections  on  Visiting  Wind- 
sor Castle — Maternal  Associations — Address  to  Mothers — Letter  to  John-street 
Maternal  Association — Visit  to  Brighton — Letter  to  her  Son       .        .       191 — 209 

CHAPTER    X. 

Her  Passion  for  Souls — Incident  of  Rev.  Charles  Simeon — Faithfulness  of  an 

American  Pastor — Letter  to  the  Duke  of Letter  to  Lord Letter  to 

the  Archbishop  of ,  on  Baptismal  Regeneration — Letter  to  A.  G.,  Esq.,  of 

New  York— Letter  to  E.  T.  C,  Esq.— Letter  to  I.  W.,  Esq.,  Boston,  U.  S.— 
Letter  to  J.  T.,  Esq. — ^Her  Love  of  Union  and  of  Truth — The  Evangelical 
Alliance — Diary — Anti-State-Church  Movement — Letter  to  Miss  C. — Letter  to 
the  Hon.  and  Rev.  B.  W.  N. — Letter  to  a  Missionary,  on  the  American  Anti- 
Slavery  Society — Letter  to  her  Niece,  Mrs.  G. — On  Public  Reading  and  Prayer 
— On  Ministerial  Watchfulness — On  Intercourse  with  God — Her  Faith  in  the 
Resurrection  of  Clirist — Looking  unto  Jesus — Conversion  of  her  Grand- 
children—Extracts from  her  Diary 210 — 239 

CHAPTER    XI. 

Her  Peculiar  Talent — ^The  Philosophy  of  Sympathy — Abercrombie  on  the  Moral 
Feelings — Letters  of  Consolation  :  To  a  beloved  Friend — ^To  Miss  L.  0.,  on  the 
Death  of  her  Mother — ^To  Mrs.  F.,  on  the  Illness  of  her  Husband — To  Mrs.  E. 
B.,  on  the  Death  of  her  Infant — To  Mrs.  C,  on  her  Illness — To  the  same,  on 
the  Death  of  her  Sister— To  Mrs.  C. ,  on  her  Affliction— To  Miss  L.  0. ,  on  behalf 
of  a  Distressed  Clergyman — To  her  Son,  on  the  Death  of  his  Child— To  Mrs. 
G.,  on  the  Death  of  her  Husband— To  Mr.  W.,  on  the  Death  of  his  Wife— To 
Rev.  J.  H.  E.,  on  his  Illness— To  Mrs.  H.,  on  the  Death  of  her  Husband- 
To  Miss  E.  W.,  in  Trial— To  Rev.  B.  P.  in  Domestic  Affliction— "  Must  I  my 
Brother  Keep  ?  "—Extracts  from  her  Diary— "  There  is  a  Voice,  it  comes  to 
me  " 240 — 261 

CHAPTER    XII. 

Remarks  on  Christian  Experience — Diary— Letters  on  Experimental  Religion— Let- 
ter to  Lady  B.,  on  the  Sealing  of  the  Spirit— To  a  Beloved  Friend,  on  Looking 
to  Christ  for  Evidences— To  Lady  L.,  on  Anticipation  of  Heaven— To  Miss  M., 
on  Ad  /ancement  in  the  Divine  Life— To  Mrs.  T.,  on  Christ's  Presence  in  Sick- 
ness-To  Mrs.  A.,  on  the  Confession  of  Sin— To  Mrs.  W.,  on  Entering  Fully  into 


10  CONTENTS. 


PAGE 

Christ— To  Rev.  J.  H.  E. ,  a  Word  in  Season  to  a  Sick  Pastor— To  Mrs.  Lieuten- 
ant-Col. P.  B.,  on  an  open  Heart  with  God — To  the  Hon.  F.  T.,  on  making  Sure 
of  Salvation — To  Lady  L.,on  the  Holy  Spirit — ^To  Miss  S.,  on  the  Christian 
Race— To  Lady  Mary  F. ,  on  Waiting  for  the  Lord— To  Mrs.  C. ,  Heaven  an  In- 
centive to  Religious  Perseverance — To  Mrs.  C. ,  on  the  Intercession  of  Christ 

—To  Mrs.  C.  G.,  on  the  Death  of  her  Child— To  her  Son— To  Miss  I -,  in  her 

Illness— To  E.  S.,  on  Telling  Jesus— To  W.  D.  L.,  in  Darkness  of  Mind— Mrs. 
AlersHankey 262—319 

CHAPTER    XIII. 

Fruit  in  Old  Age— Diary — Rev.  Dr.  Stone,  Brooklyn — Prayer  in  Suffering — Death 
of  Dr.  Chalmers — Burden  Cast  upon  God — ^Her  Lameness— Remarkable  Re- 
covery—Napton  Vicarage— Death  of  her  Daughter-in-law — Visit  to  the  Grave 
— Anticipations  of  Heaven — Bridge  on  Faith— Her  Prayer  for  the  Evangelical 
AlUance — ^Letter  to  her  Daughter — Death  of  the  Rev.  James  Harrington  Evans 
— Sympathy  with  Anxious  Inquirers— Letter  to  Lady  A.  de  Capel  B.— Letters 
to  H.  and  E.  S. — Alarming  Illness — Dr.  Golding  Bird — Letters  to  her  Grand- 
children— Rev.  David  Fenton  Jarman — General  Correspondence        .        320 — 395 

CHAPTER    XIY. 

Last  Epoch  of  the  Christian's  Life — Growing  Heavenliness — Longing  to  Depart — 
Devotional  Meditations — The  Sight  of  the  Dying — Religion  the  Business  of  Life 
— Faith  in  the  Posthumous  Answers  to  Prayer — Exclusive  Dealings  with  God 
— "Beyond  the  Smiling  and  the  Weeping  " — Broken-hearted  Communion — 
Longing  for  Revival — The  One  Church,  the  Bride  of  Christ — Recognitions  in 
Heaven — Last  Sabbath  in  the  Sanctuary — Failing  Strength — Holy  Counsels— 
The  Sick  Room— The  Gate  of  Heaven— Dying  Sayings — ^The  Closing  Scene — 
Her  Triumphant  Death — Concluding  Remarks 396 — 42(5 


MEMOIE. 


CHAPTEE    I. 

The  real  believer  in  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ  is  truly  and 
emphatically  a  'a  Hving  soul.'  Christianity  with  him  is  more 
than  a  creed,  a  symbol,  or  a  name ;  it  is  a  vital  and  a  vital- 
izing principle,  an  incorporate  of  his  moral  being :  in  a  word, 
it  is  a  spiritual  life.  In  his  experience  the  '  glorious  gospel 
of  the  blessed  God  is  not  a  myth,'  but  a  Divine  verity  ;  and 
the  truths  it  reveals  are  not  fictions  but  attested  facts,  not 
dreams  but  solemn  realities.  He  has  passed  from  death  unto 
life,  is  a  new  creature  in  Christ,  has  his  '  fruit  unto  holi- 
ness and  the  end  everlasting  life.'  And  while  multitudes  are 
thronging  the  mere  vestibule  of  the  temple,  offering  their 
dead  sacrifices  to  a  living  God ;  he,  approaching  by  the  *  new 
and  living  way,'  has  penetrated  within  the  inner  shrine,  and, 
enveloped  with  the  incense-cloud  of  the  great  Atoning  Sacri- 
fice, is  holding  '  fellowship  with  the  Father,  and  with  His 
Son  Christ  Jesus.'  The  highest  element  of  his  being  is  to 
glorify  God  here ;  and  the  consummation  of  his  hope  here- 
after will  be  the  enjoyment  of  God  for  ever.  Thus  experi- 
mentally taught  of  the  Spirit,  he  is  led  to  disbelieve  as  a 
fable,  and  to  reject  as  an  impertinence,  every  dogma  and 
vanity  that  would  supplant  the  true  gospel  of  Christ,  or  that 
offers  itself  as  a  substitute  for  a  real  heartfelt  experience  of 
the  truth.  To  sanctify  and  adorn  this  lower  world  with  such 
'  living  temples'  of  the  Spirit,  and  to  replenish  the  world  to 
come  with  their  wonder  and  praise,  was  the  great  purpose  of 
God  in  the  gracious  mission  of  His  Son  to  our  race.      "  I  am 

(11) 


12  MEMOIR    OF    MIIS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

come  that  they  might  have  life."  "  The  water  that  I  shall 
give  you  shall  be  in  you  a  well  of  water  springing  up  into 
everlasting  life."  "  Know  ye  not  that  ye  are  the  temple  of 
God,  and  that  the  Spirit  of  God  dwelleth  in  you  ?" 

In  an  age  Avhen  religious  formalism — the  bane  of  the  Chris- 
tian church — is  so  prevalent;  and  when  even  in  Christ's 
quickened  body  the  pulse  of  spiritual  life  in  many  throbs  but 
languidly,  it  is  refreshing  to  meet  with  an  instance  of  real, 
earnest  religion,  exhibiting  in  its  governing  principles,  and  re- 
flecting in  its  daily  habit,  the  power  and  lustre  of  a  heaven- 
descending  and  a  heaven-alluring  Christianity.  Such  an 
example  now  invites  the  study  of  the  spiritual  mind.  And 
to  a  spiritual  mind  only  will  it  possess  any  degree  of  interest 
or  attraction.  The  sentimentalist,  whose  piety  sublimates  into 
dreamy  mysticism, — the  formalist,  whose  religion  evaporates 
into  ritual  observance, — or  the  romantic,  whose  ideal  of  Chris- 
tianity is  the  vastness  and  splendour  of  heroic  achievement, 
will  be  conscious  of  a  feehng  of  disappointment  as  the  eye 
rolls  over  these  pages.  The  history  they  detail,  and  the 
character  they  portray,  derives  nothing  of  its  incident  or  its 
charm  from  sources  equivocal  as  these.  And  yet  it  is  no 
imaginary  or  inimitable  Christian  we  are  about  to  contem- 
plate. There  was  nothing  in  her  principles  or  example — 
nothing  in  the  grace  which  made  her  what  she  was,  and  to 
which  she  owed  all  her  hope  for  eternity — to  which  the  most 
humble  saint  may  not  aspire,  and  to  which  the  feeblest  might 
not  attain.  "  If  none  go  to  heaven  but  such  a  man  as  this, 
what  will  become  of  me  ?"  was  the  desponding  exclamation 
of  one  who  witnessed  with  admiration,  yet  dismay,  the  pre- 
eminently godly  conversation  of  the  seraphic  Leighton.  We 
anticipate,  however,  no  such  feeling  of  despair  as  the  result 
of  the  perusal  of  this  volume.  We  trust  that  the  life  we  are 
about  to  trace,  heavenly  and  holy  though  it  was,  will  so  ex- 
hibit the  fullness  and  preciousness  of  Christ,  so  illustrate  the 
power  and  sufficiency  of  divine  grace,  and  so  unfold  the  lov- 
ing, winning  cliaracter  of  God,  as  to  stimulate  and  encourage 
the  lowliest  heart  that  admires  its  beauty,  and  would  ftiin 
transcribe  its  excellence.  "  Nevertheless,  it  is  of  incalculable 
advantage  to  have  before  us  some  bright  examples  of  saints 
who  have  outstripped  their  competitors,  and  gained  the  sum- 
mit of  the  hill  up  which  the  train  of  feeble  pilgrims  is  still 
painfully  toiling.     Such  extraordinary  proficients  in  the  life 


BIRTH — ANCESTRY.  13 

iirid  power  of  godliness  are  the  salt  of  the  earth  to  keep  it 
from  corruption.  They  rebuke  the  slackness  of  those  half- 
hearted, home-sick  mariners  who  stand  off  and  on,  wistfully 
eying  the  shore  from  which  they  have  voluntarily  parted,  in- 
stead of  launching  into  the  deep,  and  making  sail  for  a  better 
country."  *  Such  a  '  proficient  in  the  life  and  power  of  god- 
hness'  we  are  about  to  present ;  and  although  a  filial  hand 
tremblingly  attempts  the  portrait,  it  yet  will  be  his  single  aim 
so  truthfully  to  delineate  each  feature  of  her  character  as  to 
present  her  as  she  really  was ;  and  yet  so  carefully  to  veil  the 
glory  of  the  creature  as  shall  constrain  all  who  look  upon  the 
picture  to  magnify  the  grace  of  God  in  her. 

Mrs.  Winslow  was  bom  in  St.  George's,  Bermuda,  on 
the  28th  of  February,  1774.  On  the  paternal  side  she  was 
of  Scotch  descent.  Her  grandfather.  Dr.  George  Forbes,  f 
was  a  native  of  Scotland,  but  resided  in  Bermuda ;  and  was 
united  in  marriage  to  the  eldest  daughter  of  Thomas  Jones, 
Esq.,  President  of  the  Council,  and  during  two  temporary  va- 
cancies in  the  administration,  acting  Governor  of  the  colony. 
Robert  Forbes,  the  youngest  son  of  this  marriage,  adopting 
the  profession  of  his  father,  pursued  his  studies  in  Edinburgh ; 
and  on  taking  his  degree,  returned  to  the  island,  and  after- 
wards married  Mary,  the  only  daughter  of  Alexander  Rush, 
Esq.  Mary  Forbes,  the  subject  of  this  Memoir,  was  the 
single  issue  of  this  union. 

An  only  child,  and  the  sole  representative  of  his  family,  her 
father's  affections  and  hopes  concentrated  upon  her  with  no 
ordinary  intensity,  and  his  anxiety  to  fit  her  for  her  future  posi- 
tion in  life  was  proportionably  great.  No  means,  therefore, 
which  a  cultivated  mind  could  suggest,  or  ample  resources 
command,  were  spared  in  placing  within  her  reach  the  highest 
literary  advantages.  After  giving,  with  his  own  hands  the 
first  form  and  development  to  her  mind  and  character,  a  com- 
petent tutor  was  procured  from  Scotland,  to  whose  educa- 
tional care  the  interesting  charge  was  now  confided. 

But  while  her  mental  training,  under  her  father's  super- 
vision, was  thus  successfully  advancing,  another  and  not  less 
potent  influence  was  silently  at  work,  aiding  the  formation  of 
a  character  which,  for  its  natural  impressibility   and  strength, 

«  Pearson's  Life  of  Archbishop  Leigiitoa. 

f  Dr.  Forbes  belonged  to  a  younger  branch  of  the  fifteenth  Lord  Forbes, 
of  Putechie  Castle,  Aberdeenshire. 


14  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

rendered  all  tlie  more  necessary  the  skilful  moulding  of  a 
mother's  plastic  hand.  Possessing  a  remarkably  matured 
judgment,  great  force  of  character,  and  gentleness  of  disposi- 
tion, few  women  were  better  fitted  for  the  task  than  Mrs. 
Forbes.  Faithfulness,  however,  compels  us  to  notice  an  essen- 
tial deficiency  in  her  early  education,  which  no  intellectual  ad- 
vantages, however  great,  or  parental  anxiety,  however  intense, 
could  supply — we  refer  to  the  absence  of  the  Christian  element 
Rehgion,  indeed,  was  not  entirely  excluded,  but  it  was  the 
religion  of  form  rather  than  of  power.  It  was  not  until  she 
had  reached  the  culminating  point  of  life,  that  Mrs.  Forbes 
became  a  subject  of  Divine  grace.  Up  to  that  period  of  her 
history  she  had  been  basing  her  hope  of  heaven  upon  a  mere 
ethical  rehgion.  Those  winning  traits  of  disposition  and  mu- 
nificent acts  of  benevolence  which  invested  her  character  with 
so  great  a  charm,  and  which  won  for  her  such  universal  love, 
were  made  to  take  the  place  of  the  weightier  matters  of  faith 
in  Christ  and  love  to  God.  The  perusal  of  Hervey's  works, 
(aided  by  the  letters  of  her  daughter,)  in  which  that  deep- 
thinking  writer  exposes,  by  a  process  of  reasoning  the  most 
scriptural  and  convincing,  though  in  a  style  somewhat  florid 
and  diffuse,  the  fallacy  of  every  hope  of  justification  but  by 
the  imputed  righteousness  of  Christ,  was  the  first  means,  in 
the  hands  of  the  Holy  Spirit,  of  bringing  home  to  her  mind  a 
conviction  of  her  lost  condition  as  a  sinner,  and  of  unveiling 
to  her  eye  the  sufficiency  and  beauty  of  the  Lord  Jesus  as  a 
Saviour.  From  the  moment  that  she  exchanged  her  own 
righteousness  for  the  righteousness  of  Christ,  she  devoted  her- 
self to  the  service  and  glory  of  her  Redeemer  with  a  self- 
sacrificing  zeal  and  singleness  of  purpose  which  never  swerved 
nor  faltered  to  the  moment  that  she  finished  her  Christian 
career,  and  peacefully  rested  from  her  labours  in  the  eighty- 
sixth  year  of  her  age. 

As  the  chief  interest  of  this  Memoir  is  derived  from  the  re- 
ligious character  of  its  subject,  we  cannot  too  soon  introduce 
the  reader  to  that  period  of  her  history  which  marks  the  first 
inspiration  of  spiritual  life  ;  prefacing  it,  however,  with  a  brief 
record  of  some  of  those  remarkable  providential  circumstances 
in  her  early  and  unconverted  years,  which  may  be  regarded 
as  the  foreshadowings  of  G-od's  purposes  of  love  and  grace 
towards  her.  We  quote  from  a  narrative  penned  by  herself, 
and  addressed  to  her  family : — 


PROVIDENTIAL    PRESERVATIONS.  15 

"I  have  often  promised  to  relate  to  you  some  of  God's  most 
gracious  dealings  towards  me  in  my  early  life,  showing  how 
manifestly  His  people  are  preserved  in  Christ  Jesus^  and  called. 
With  Paul  I  may  say,  I  have  been  in  deaths  oft  by  land  and 
sea,  by  fire  and  water.  The  first  remarkable  event  of  my  life 
was  a  sudden  recovery  from  illness  when  about  five  years  of 
age,  after  I  had  been  given  over  by  my  father  to  die.  But  a 
more  striking  providence  followed.  Soon  after  my  almost 
miraculous  restoration  as  from  the  grave,  I  accompanied  my 
parents  during  the  French  war  on  a  visit  to  England.  Our 
vessel  was  a  light  barque,  carrying  a  few  guns,  and  but  ill 
furnished  for  severe  conflict  with  the  enemy.  On  entering 
the  Channel,  and  midway  between  the  English  and  French 
coasts,  a  ship  of  war  hove  in  sight.  It  was  towards  night, 
and  as  she  appeared  to  bear  down  upon  us,  our  captain  pre- 
pared for  action.  My  mother  and  I  were  hurried  from  the 
cabin  to  what  was  thought  a  place  of  greater  safety  below. 
My  father  remained  on  deck.  All  was  confusion  above  us. 
while  I  was  astonished  at  being  thus  suddenly  removed  from 
my  comfortable  berth  to  the  dismal  quarters  beneath  the  decks. 
We  had  not  been  long  there,  when  I  observed  a  boy  come 
occasionally  to  the  place  of  our  imprisonment,  and  with  a  large 
horn  in  his  hand  take  something  from  out  of  a  barrel,  having 
first  fixed  a  lighted  candle  upon  its  edge  and  leaving  it  there. 
Observing,  as  I  sat  upon  my  mother's  lap — who  was  too  ab- 
sorbed in  anxiety  to  notice  the  circumstance — that  the  piece 
of  candle  was  nearly  burnt  to  the  edge,  I  got  down,  put  out 
my  hand  and  took  it  away,  saying  '  Mamma,  this  will  burn 
the  barrel.'  It  was  a  cask  of  gunpowder!  Had  I  not  re- 
moved it  at  that  moment,  or,  in  removing  it,  had  a  spark  fallen 
from  the  lengthened  wick,  the  vessel  and  all  on  board  must 
instantly  have  been  blown  to  atoms.  What  a  wonderful  pre- 
servation from  instantaneous  and  eternal  destruction  ;  for  it  is 
not  supposed  that  there  was  a  single  person  on  board  who 
knew  the  Lord  !  " 

As  night  grew  on,  concealed  by  its  darkness,  the  man-of- 
war  passed  their  little  vessel  unobserved,  and  thus,  through 
the  good  hand  of  God  upon  them,  they  were  preserved  from 
captivity  on  the  one  hand,  and  from  immediate  death  on  the 
other.  They  arrived  safely  in  England,  and  ;if*-er  remaining 
until  the  health  of  Dr.  Forbes  was  restored,  they  returned  to 
Bermuda,  by  way  of  the  West  Indies.     They  touched  at  An- 


li^  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

tigua  for  a  few  days,  and  accepted  an  invitation  to  dine  and 
spend  the  night  at  the  house  of  a  distinguished  resident  of  the 
island,  who  asked  a  large  party  of  the  inhabitants  to  meet 
them.  They  retired  late,  but  not  many  hours  had  passed  when 
the  door  of  their  room  was  burst  open,  and  a  voice  of  alarm 
roused  them  from  their  sleep  with  the  terrific  cry  that  the 
house  was  on  fire,  urging  their  immediate  escape.  Not  a  mo- 
ment was  to  be  lost.  Her  mother,  wrapping  a  portion  of  the 
l)edclothe3  round  herself  and  child,  rushed  from  the  room,  while 
her  father,  seizing  what  valuable  things  he  could,  prepared  to 
follow.  In  a  few  moments  the  flames  bursting  from  every 
part,  had  completely  enveloped  the  house  ;  the  roof  fell  in  with 
a  tremendous  crash,  and  in  a  short  time  the  beautiful  mansion, 
which  a  few  hours  before  had  been  the  brilhant  scene  of  festive 
hospitality,  was  now  a  mass  of  smouldering  ruins.  Had  they 
not  been  aroused  at  the  moment  they  were,  so  rapid  was  the 
conflagration,  they  must  inevitably  have  perished.  Thus  was 
the  life  of  God's  chosen  one  again  redeemed  from  destruc- 
tion— still  preserved  in  Christ  Jesus. 

Yet  another  remarkable  interposition  of  God's  providence, 
as  occurring  in  early  life,  may  be  given.  After  a  short  pas- 
sage from  New  York  to  Bermuda,  accompanied  by  her  aunt, 
they  arrived  on  a  beautiful  morning  in  sight  of  the  island. 
Everything  looked  promising,  and  all  were  rejoicing  in  the 
prospect  of  soon  landing  amidst  the  welcomings  of  relatives 
and  friends.  The  prospect,  as  they  neared  the  cluster  of 
islands,  was  surprisingly  lovely.  The  blue  hills  in  the  dis- 
tance— the  tall  cedars — the  coral  shore  stretching  into  a  trans- 
parent ocean — the  gentle  breeze  blowing  from  the  land  laden 
with  a  thousand  perfumes — the  blue  sky  above — and  the  whole 
panorama  bathed  in  the  warm  beams  of  a  southern  sun,  gave 
to  the  entire  scene  the  enchantment  of  a  fairy  land.  All  were 
prepared  for  going  on  shore,  waiting  but  the  pilot  to  come  off 
and  conduct  them  in.  But  ere  an  hour  had  passed,  the  sky 
grew  dark,  storm-clouds  gathered,  a  fearful  hurricane,  common 
in  these  latitudes,  suddenly  arose,  and  the  vessel,  driven  out 
again  to  sea,  threatened  every  moment  to  founder.  All  was 
now  confusion  and  dismay.  In  a  few  moments  the  masts  were 
cut  away,  and  the  deck,  washed  by  the  mountain  waves,  was 
swept  of  everything  but  the  caboose.  It  was  an  appalling 
spectacle.  Every  face  gathered  paleness,  and  despair  seized 
every  heart.     Vessels  making  for  the  same  port  were  seen  to 


PROVIDENTIAL   PRESERVATIONS.  17 

go  down  into  the  yawning  billows  with  all  sail  standing.  As 
the  sea  made  a  complete  breach  over  the  vessel,  the  officers 
and  crew  were  compelled  to  take  refuge  in  the  cabin,  waiting 
their  expected  and  almost  certain  doom.  The  helm  was  lashed, 
and  the  dismantled  hulk,  which  a  few  hours  before  was  gal- 
lantly steering  for  her  port,  was  now  tossed  like  a  log  upon 
the  ocean.  The  first  long  dreary  night  was  one  of  horror.  In 
this  helpless  condition  they  drifted  about  for  several  days, 
when — the  gale  having  somewhat  subsided — coming  up  to  a 
deserted  wreck,  w^iich  like  themselves  had  suffered  in  the 
storm,  they  took  from  her  the  masts  and  rigging,  which  lay 
dangling  at  her  side ;  and  refitting,  as  best  they  could,  their 
disabled  vessel,  once  more  made  their  way  to  the  island,  which 
they  reached  in  safety,  and  were  received  by  their  friends  as 
those  whom  the  sea  had  given  back  from  the  dead.  It  was  a 
singular  providence,  that  on  opening  the  caboose  for  the  pur- 
pose of  preparing  some  food,  the  goat,  which  had  taken  refuge 
there  in  the  storm,  sprang  out ;  and  thus,  in  the  absence  of 
the  supply  of  water,  which  the  sea  had  swept  from  the  decks, 
afforded  a  little  timely  nourishment  during  the  remainder  of 
the  passage.  In  narrating  this  remarkable  deliverance,  she 
adds,  "  But  what  of  God  ?  "Was  there  one  grateful  heart 
there  ?  I  am  sure  mine  was  not.  Oh,  the  wonders  of  His 
love  !  Oh,  the  marvellous  goodness  and  long-suffering  of  our 
God  !  How  much  has  He  borne  with  my  manners  in  the 
wilderness  !  " 

On  the  6th  of  September,  1791,  Miss  Forbes  was  married 
in  St.  George's,  Bermuda,  to  Thomas  Winslow,  Esq.,  who, 
with  a  detachment  of  his  regiment,  was  at  the  time  quartered 
in  the  island.  A  lineal  descendant  of  Edward  Winslow,  one 
of  the  earhest  of  the  Pilgrim  Fathers,  and  Governor  of  Ply- 
mouth colony.  Captain  Winslow  was  ennobled  in  his  ancestry. 
The  history  of  the  Pilgrims  will  ever  form  one  of  the  most 
entrancing  and  instructive  chapters  in  the  annals  of  the  Chris- 
tian church.  Although  many  long  years  have  passed  since 
the  "May-flower"  sailed  out  of  the  waters  of  Delft  Haven, 
and  revolution  has  succeeded  revolution,  and  school  has  fol- 
lowed school  in  church  and  state,  the  memory  of  the  Pilgrims 
still  lives  in  undimmed,  undying  interest,  more  precious  and 
fragrant  now  than  ever.  It  would  seem  as  if  it  were  especially 
awarded  to  the  intelligence  and  piety  of  the  present  age  to 
exhibit  the  principles,  to  vindicate  the  cliaracter,  and  to  embalm 


18  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

the  memory  of  those  distinguished  confessors.  Certainly  no 
preceding  age  has  j^resented  a  hght  more  favourable  to  the  calm, 
accurate  study  of  their  history  than  the  present.  Historians, 
differing  from  them  in  ecclesiastical  views,  yet  unblinded  by 
prejudice,  have  delighted  to  glorify  the  grace  of  God  in  those 
holy  men  and  women — who,  for  conscience'  sake,  for  truth's 
sake,  and  for  Christ's  sake,  expatriated  themselves  from  the 
land  of  their  birth,  braved  the  storms  of  a  winter's  voyage, 
and  sought  amidst  the  unbroken  and  inhospitable  wilds  of  New 
England  the  religious  liberty  denied  them  at  home.  Linked 
by  her  marriage  with  this  "noble  array  of  martyrs,"  was  now 
the  subject  of  our  Memoir.  Nor  did  she  prove  an  unworthy 
graft  of  a  stem  so  honoured.  In  the  evangelical  principles 
which  she  maintained,  in  the  strong  faith  she  exhibited,  in  the 
patience  in  suffering  and  the  fortitude  in  adversity  which  she 
exemplified,  the  spirit  of  the  Pilgrims  would  seem  to  have 
revived  in  her. 

It  would,  perhaps,  be  unnecessary,  under  ordinary  circum- 
stances, to  venture  more  than  a  passing  allusion  to  the  history 
of  her  marriage ;  but,  as  this  event  wears  somewhat  of  a  reli- 
gious aspect,  it  being  connected  with  the  first  real  prayer  she 
is  supposed  ever  to  have  offered,  a  more  circumstantial  detail 
may  be  expected. 

Entered  upon  at  an  age  of  extreme  youth  and  warm  im- 
pulse, with  but  a  slight  knowledge  of  the  world,  and  deprived 
of  a  father's  gentle  but  firm  control,  we  conceal  not  that  the 
step  as  taken  by  her  involved  a  degree  of  responsibility  and 
hazard  too  serious  for  ordinary  prudence  to  justify.  That  it 
was  in  every  respect  a  suitable  alliance,  yielding  to  its  latest 
hour  unmingled  happiness,  must  be  traced  to  something  beyond 
the  sagacity  and  forethought  of  a  warm-hearted  and  confiding 
girl,  of  but  eighteen  bright  summers.  Referring  to  it  in  after 
years,  she  remarks,  "  I  acted  wrong ;  but  God  most  wonder- 
fully and  mercifully  directed  the  whole,  and  overruled  the  evil 
for  our  good  and  for  His  own  glory."  The  '  evil '  to  which 
she  here  so  ingenuously  refers  was  the  impetuosity  which  led 
her  to  act,  in  so  momentous  a  matter,  independently  of  author- 
ity. Adverse  to  her  marrying  in  the  army,  as  necessarily  in- 
volving a  wide  separation  from  her  child,  her  mother  had  dis- 
couraged several  military  suitors  for  her  daughter's  hand,  and 
had  as  decidedly  opposed  the  attentions  of  Lieut.  Winslow. 
But  her  heart's  young  affections  were  secretly  and  irrevocably 


FIRST   PRAYER.  19 

surrendered,  not  only  to  the  most  admired  and  beloved  officer 
in  his  regiment,  but  to  one  whose  station  in  life  and  whose 
personal  excellence  were  worthy  of  her  confidence.  That 
with  a  step  involving  so  much  excited  natural  feeling  there 
should  be  blended  a  sentiment  so  thoughtful  and  sacred  as  that 
which  we  are  about  to  record  is,  doubtless,  the  most  remark- 
able and  instructive  feature  in  the  narrative.  Her  own  pen 
the  most  appropriately  and  beautifully  pursues  the  story. 

"Now  nearly  eighteen,  gay,  thoughtless,  full  of  life  and 
vivacity,  I  felt  my  freedom  and  enjoyed  it.  Three  companies 
of  the  47th  Regiment  arrived  at  Bermuda  from  New  Provi- 
dence. The  new  comers  soon  obtained  introduction  to  the 
leading  families  of  the  island,  and  greatly  increased  its  gaieties. 
It  was  more  than  a  year  before  I  became  sensible  of  the  at- 
tractions and  attentions  of  one  of  the  officers.  These  atten- 
tions grew  more  marked.  My  mother  became  alarmed.  I 
was  immediately  sent  from  home,  and  placed  under  the  care 
of  an  aunt  residing  several  miles  from  town.  One  day  a  gen- 
tleman came  out  to  dinner.  In  the  course  of  the  conversation 
he  casually  mentioned  that  orders  had  come  from  New  Provi- 
dence for  Lieut.  Winslow  to  join  the  regiment  there.  This 
intelligence  went  like  a  dagger  to  my  heart.  In  vain  I  strove 
to  disguise  my  feelings, — bursting  into  tears,  I  left  the  table. 
Then  was  I  convinced  that  my  heart  was  not  my  own.  I  retired 
to  my  room  to  reflect  upon  my  course.  I  knew  the  Governor 
could  not  interpose,  nor  had  the  Colonel  in  command  power  to 
detain  an  officer  under  orders  from  head-quarters.  My  happiness 
was  at  stake.  Great  was  my  distress,  intense  my  agony  of 
mind.  "Who  could  prevent  his  going  ?  The  thought  suddenly 
occurred  to  me, — God  can  !  In  a  moment  I  arose,  locked  my 
door,  and  fell  upon  my  knees  before  Him,  It  was  my  first 
prayer  !  In  the  simplest  form  of  words  imaginable,  I  earnestly 
pleaded  with  the  Lord  not  only  to  prevent  his  going,  but  to 
give  him  to  me  as  my  husband.  The  prayer  was  offered — the 
request  was  made, — and  I  arose  from  my  knees  with  a  spirit 
as  light  as  a  feather.  My  sadness  and  anxiety  all  were  gone. 
Was  not  this  of  God  ?  Was  not  this  faith  in  the  power  of 
God  ?  What  brought  such  instantaneous  and  perfect  relief  to 
my  distressed  heart?  Was  it  not  that  God  gave  me  the 
power  to  believe  that  He  would  grant  me  my  request  ?  The 
next  day,  with  the  permission  of  my  aunt,  I  mounted  my 
horse,  and  attended  l^y  a  servant,  rode   into  town.     To  my 


20  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

astonishment  my  mother  received  me  affectionately,  and  uttered 
not  a  word  of  rebuke  at  my  return.  The  Lord  had  turned 
her  heart.  That  evening  I  met  the  object  of  my  ajQfections. 
The  proposal  of  a  private  marriage  was  made,  and,  after  some 
trembling  hesitation,  was  acceded  to.  The  next  morning — a 
hcence  having  been  procured — we  met  at  the  house  of  my 

friend,  Judge  L ,  and  from  thence,  accompanied   by  two 

of  the  officers  and  the  wife  of  one  of  them,  we  went  to  the 
house  of  the  clergyman  of  the  parish,*  where  I  was  united  in 
the  bonds  of  holy  wedlock  to  the  man  of  my  choice,  the  be- 
loved of  my  heart.  The  first  emotion  of  my  mother,  when 
the  intelhgence  was  broken  to  her,  was  distress ;  the  second 
was  love.  I  was  received  and  forgiven.  Never  had  she 
reason  to  regret  my  choice.  She  loved  my  husband  as  her 
own  son,  and  an  affectionate  son  he  proved.  Thus  was  my 
prayer  answered  three  days  only  after  I  had  offered  it  up  to 
that  God  with  whom  all  things  are  possible.  From  the  mo- 
ment I  uttered  that  prayer,  every  obstacle  which  before  seemed 
insurmountable  was  removed.  "Was  there  not  faith  in  that 
prayer — faith  in  the  power  of  God?  Surely  there  was;  and 
yet  how  many  years  did  it  lie  beneath  the  rubbish  of  the  fall ! 
Still  I  was  His,  and  my  precious  husband  was  His,  and  we 
were  to  be  the  honoured  parents  of  many  that  should  be  His, 
some  to  preach  His  blessed  Gospel,  and  all,  I  trust,  to  be  united 
together  in  one  band  of  love  at  His  right  hand  through  an 
endless  eternity." 

In  throwing  back  a  glance  upon  the  preceding  narrative, 
fidehty  as  a  Christian  biographer,  yet  blended  with  the  most 
sacred  filial  reverence,  would  seem  to  demand  from  the  pen 
that  records  it,  an  observation  in  reference  to  the  principle  of 
action  which  she  herself,  in  moments  of  calm  reflection,  and 
when  true  religion  had  become  enthroned  upon  her  heart,  so 
honestly  and  emphatically  deprecated.  There  were  two  points 
in  her  marriage  which  render  the  self-responsible  course  she 
adopted  such  as  no  reasoning  could  commend,  and  the  imita- 
tions of  which,  no  results,  however  overruled  by  God,  could 
justify.  The  one  was,  —  the  too  excited  feelings  which  were 
allowed  to  control  the  judgment,  and  the  other, — the  acting  in 
opposition  to  a  parent's  wishes.  It  is  true,  there  does  not  ap- 
pear to  have  been  any  express  command  or  positive  injunction  ; 
but  surely  it  was  enough  to  know  that  her  mother  disapproved 

*  Tt  was  then  the  custom  to  celebrate  marriages  in  private  houses. 


mCFLECTIONS.  21 

of  the  step,  to  have  dictated  a  more  reflective  course.  "  Honour 
thy  father  and  thy  mother,"  is  a  divine  precept  of  such  impor- 
tance in  God's  sight,  as  to  be  annexed  to  the  promise,  "  that 
thy  days  may  be  long  in  the  land  which  the  Lord  thy  God 
giveth  thee."  In  no  step  in  life  (and  for  the  youthful  reader 
of  these  pages  we  especially  venture  upon  the  remark) — for 
none  involves  consequences  of  such  moment — is  a  child  more 
imperiously  and  solemnly  bound  to  recognize  parental  authori- 
ty than  that  which  Miss  Forbes  now  took.  We  are  not  pre- 
pared to  say  that  in  all  similar  cases  a  parent's  judgment  may 
be  the  best — for  it  may  be  warped  by  prejudice,  or  be  con- 
trolled by  unworthy  influence, — yet  no  circumstances  what- 
ever can  justify  an  entire  abnegation,  on  the  part  of  the  child, 
of  that  sacred  relation  which  God  has  made  a  beautiful  type  of 
His  owp^  and  which  imparts  to  the  domestic  constitution  its 
dignity  and  strength. 

And  yet  that  first  prayer  !  Ah  !  who  can  adequately  de- 
scribe i  .s  preciousness  and  importance  ?  It  is  the  first  breath 
of  God — the  first  pulse  of  spiritual  life — the  first  dawn  of  end- 
less gk  ry  in  the  soul.  How  many  an  earnest  pastor,  how 
many  a  pious  parent,  how  many  a  fond  friend  anxiously  waits 
the  blfssed  announcement — "Behold,  he  prayeth  !"  That 
faint  scintillation  of  spiritual  life  may  retire,  as  if  quenched  in 
utter  d'.rkness,  and  long  and  dreary  may  be  the  night  that 
enshrouds  it ;  but  at  some  future  day  it  will  reappear — for  it 
was  in  .perishable  — and  realize,  in  its  fulness  of  blessing,  the 
hope  it?  first  pale  gleam  had  inspired.  Blessed  truth !  the 
little  sc  ed  of  grace,  once  dropped  into  the  soul,  will  germinate, 
'  take  rrot  downward  and  bear  fruit  upward'  unto  life  eternal. 

Passing  over  several  years  subsequent  to  her  marriage  — 
years  spent  in  military  life,  and,  although  not  devoid  of  much 
that  w.'uS  interesting  and  eventful,  yet  supplying  in  their  his- 
tory hu^  little  material  in  keejDing  with  the  grave  character 
of  this  volume — we  proceed  to  record  that  momentous  event 
which  f^ave  to  all  her  future  life  its  reality,  sanctity,  and  charm. 


CHAPTER   11. 

To  a  mind  in  sympathy  with  the  beautiful  in  nature,  there 
are  few  spectacles  more  exquisitely  enjoyable  than  the  day- 
dawn  in  spring.  To  watch  the  gradual  dissolving  of  night's 
deep  shadows  into  grey  twihght, — the  twilight  blushing  into 
the  rose-hue  of  morning — to  catch  the  iirst  new-born  ray  trem- 
bling in  the  eastern  sky,  all  nature  starting  from  its  slumber, 
and  hymning  its  early  praise  to  the  Creator,  who  "  maketh 
the  outgoings  of  the  morning  and  the  evening  to  rejoice" — is 
a  scene  of  intense  interest  and  beauty.  But  to  a  mind  sensi- 
ble of  moral  beauty,  transcendently  more  lovely  is  the  day- 
dawn  of  grace  in  the  soul.  To  trace  the  first  faint  glimmer  of 
spiritual  light  struggling  with  the  darkness  of  the  mind — to 
behold  that  mind  gradually  emerging  from  its  night  of  gloom 
into  the  calm  sunshine  of  a  new  spiritual  creation,  and  to  watch 
its  progress  as  it  "  shineth  more  and  more  unto  the  perfect 
day,"  is  a  spectacle  of  yet  surpassing  grandeur.  Such  a  pic- 
ture, as  sketched  by  her  own  pen,  we  are  about  to  contem- 
plate : 

"  From  the  age  of  ten  years  I  have  been  in  the  habit  of 
reading  to  my  mother,  every  night,  the  '  Whole  Duty  of  Man.' 
This  book,  I  believe,  brought  me  under  a  law-work  of  soul. 
After  my  marriage,  I  discontinued  reading  it,  but  still  what  I 
had  read  was  impressed  upon  my  mind  and  memory.  Often 
would  the  thought  come  over  me,  '  How  can  such  a  one  as  I 
get  to  heaven  ?  Heaven  is  a  good  place,  and  only  the  good 
go  there.  Oh,  if  I  could  but  cease  from  sin  and  keep  the 
Commandments.'  Sometimes  I  shut  myself  up,  and  with  the 
the  '  Whole  Duty  of  Man'  or  the  Prayer  Book  in  my  hand, 
upon  my  knees  I  have  solemnly  promised  I  would  keep  all  the 
Commandments,  and  while  doing  this  have  felt  greatly  relieved 
of  my  burden,  as  if  the  work  were  done  that  was  to  fit  me  for 
heaven.  But  ere  the  day  was  over,  my  goodness  had  passed 
away,  and  I  felt  as  unfit  as  ever  for  the  abodes  of  the  holy  and 
the  good.  At  other  times  I  thought  I  was  not  worse  than 
most  people,  and  that  God  was  too  good  to  condemn  the  whole 
world.  During  this  period  I  never  hinted  my  feelings  to  my 
husband :  I  was  afraid  he  would  think  from  my  distress  of 
(22) 


FIRST    CONVICTIONS   OP   SIN.  23 

mind  that  I  had  committed  some  dreadful  sin,  nor  could  I  ex- 
plain my  views  to  him.  I  heard  no  gospel,  though  a  constant 
attendant  at  church.  Once  I  ventured  to  go  to  the  Lord's 
Table,  and  recollect  shedding  tears  at  hearing  of  the  sufferings 
of  Christ.  But  soon  after  I  relapsed  into  the  ways  of  the 
world  and  forgot  my  vows.  A  young  creature,  the  wife  of 
one  of  the  officers,  died  at  a  place  where  our  regiment  was 
quartered.  Her  death  greatly  shocked  me,  as  I  feared  she 
was  not  good  enough,  any  more  than  myself,  to  go  to  heaven, 
I  was  in  the  room  when  she  died ;  but  as  we  were  under 
orders  for  Bermuda,  I  soon,  in  the  bustle  and  excitement  of 
preparing  for  the  voyage,  forgot  the  serious  impression  her 
death  made  upon  me ;  but  still  an  earnest  desire  more  or  less 
followed  me  to  try  and  commend  myself  to  God,  and  make 
myself  fit  for  heaven.  I  often  hoped  I  might  die  of  a  linger- 
ing disease,  as  that  would  afford  me  more  time  for  repentance. 
"Soon  after  my  marriage  I  was  at  a  ball;  I  was  then  a 
bride,  receiving  much  attention,  and  my  pride  was  gratified. 
I  had  married  the  man  I  loved,  and  who  loved  me  in  return. 
My  mother  was  more  than  reconciled  to  the  step  I  had  taken 
— she  was  pleased.  I  had  everything  my  carnal  heart  could 
desire,  not  a  wish  was  ungratified.  I  was  at  the  very  zenith 
of  earthly  happiness.  On  returning  from  the  ball,  I  took  a 
hasty  review  of  the  evening  I  had  passed  as  I  lay  sleepless 
upon  my  pillow.  The  glitter — the  music — the  dance — the 
excitement — the  attention — the  pleasure,  all  passed  before  me. 
But  oh,  I  felt  a  want  I  could  not  describe.  I  sighed,  and 
whispered  to  myself  these  expressive  words :  '  Is  this  all  ?'  I 
felt  at  the  moment  that  if  this  were  all  the  happiness  the  world 
could  bestow,  then  was  there  a  lack  I  knew  not  how  to  sup- 
ply, and  a  void  I  could  not  fill.  I  had  reached  the  very  sum- 
mit of  earthly  bliss,  and  found  it  to  fall  short  of  what  my 
heart  craved,  and  my  soul  required.  Prom  this  time  I  grew 
more  fond  of  retirement,  and  less  inclined  to  mingle  with  the 
gay  world.  I  felt  that  what  I  had  been  pursuing  in  the  early 
part  of  my  life  was  not  happiness.  I  turned  from  it  with  a 
sensation  of  loathing,  and  sought  in  solitude  what  I  had  never 
found  in  the  brilliant  and  crowded  walks  of  life.  I  thought 
that  there  must  be  a  state  where  real  happiness  was  to  be 
found.  In  this  condition  of  mind  I  continued  for  years,  striv- 
ing to  keep  the  law,  and  to  shape  my  course  by  the  '  Whole 
Duty  of  Man.'     I  endeavoured  to  walk  so  as  to  please  God, 


24  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

but  again  and  again  my  best  resolutions  were  broken.  These 
feelings  I  concealed  from  all  around  me,  for  I  would  not  for 
the  world  have  breathed  a  hint  that  I  was  unhappy  to  the 
dearest  friend.  I  saw  every  one  around  me  apparently  happy 
in  the  possession  of  the  world  which  had  lost  its  charm  for  me. 
I  now  sought  peace  of  mind  in  domestic  enjoyment.  I  was 
encircled  by  my  children,  possessed  a  husband  who  anticipated 
my  fondest  wish,  and  my  heart  could  sigh  for  nothing  of 
earthly  bliss  which  I  did  not  possess — and  still  I  was  unhappy. 
I  was  a  sinner, — and  this  secret  conviction  beclouded  every 
prospect,  and  embittered  every  cup." 

Such  were  the  mental  exercises — sad,  yet  hopeful — which 
foreshadowed  the  day-spring  from  on  high  in  her  heart.  It 
was  now  the  twilight  of  grace  in  her  soul.  The  dark  clouds 
which  had  so  long  enshrouded  her  were  breaking,  and  this 
dreary  night  of  weeping  was  fast  retiring  before  the  dawning 
splendour  of  a  morning  of  joy.  After  living  a  military  life 
for  some  years,  Captain  Winslow  was  induced  to  retire  to  an 
ancestral  estate  near  Romford,  in  Essex.  But  change  of  place 
and  diversity  of  scene  supply  no  real  relief  to  a  mind  burdened 
with  sin.     Referring  to  her  removal,  she  remarks : 

"  While  here  I  was  conscious — though  surrounded  by  every 
earthly  comfort,  and  by  all  I  loved,  and  had  more  time  for 
reading  and  reflection — of  the  same  lack  I  had  felt  years  be- 
fore. My  mind  was  restless.  My  soul  wanted  what  earth 
could  not  supply.  And  yet  I  could  not  describe  to  any  one 
what  I  needed,  nor  what  I  felt.  I  was  unhappy — at  times  mis- 
erable ;  my  weary  soul  thirsting  for  what  it  had  not,  and  yet 
I  could  not  answer  myself,  and  say  what  that  one  thing  was." 

It  was  no  longer  possible  to  conceal  from  her  husband  a  sad- 
ness which,  like  the  spoiler,  wrapped  itself  within  the  folds  of 
every  flower  of  earthly  good.  The  quick  eye  of  affection  de- 
tected a  lurking  sorrow,  the  cause  of  which  baffled  his  ingenu- 
ity to  discover.  He  marked  the  pallor  of  her  cheek,  the  stifled 
sigh,  and  the  vain  attempt  at  cheerfulness.  It  was  enough, 
however,  to  know  that  she  was  unha]vpy ;  attributing  it  to  the 
solitude  of  their  residence,  he  instantly  resolved  upon  an  ex- 
pedient for  its  relief.  On  returning  home  one  day,  he  informed 
her  that  he  had  taken  a  house  in  town,  and  proposed  an  imme- 
diate removal.  The  idea  of  a  change  was  pleasing,  and  in  a 
short  time  they  were  fully  established  in  their  new  abode.  In 
all  this  God's  hand  was  signally  moving.     He  was  loading  her 


ST.    JAMES'S    CHAPEL,    PENTONVILLE.  25 

blind  steps  by  a  way  she  knew  not,  but  it  was  to  bring  her  soul, 
panting  for  the  "  living  water,"  to  the  spring  whence  it  flowed. 
It  does  not  appear  that  the  ministry  of  the  parish  church  in 
which  her  new  residence  was  situate  was  of  a  character  calcu- 
lated to  meet  the  exigencies  of  such  a  case.  There  was  the 
absence  of  that  evangelical  element  which  could  alone  consti- 
tute it  a  message  of  "  life  and  spirit  "  to  its  hearers.  Referring 
to  it,  she  says,  "There  was  nothing  to  satisfy  my  soul."  The 
first  event  marking  God's  overruling  providence  in  this  change 
of  residence  was  the  appointment,  just  at  this  juncture,  of  the 
Rev.  Thomas  Sheppard  to  the  perpetual  curacy  of  St.  James's 
Episcopal  Chapel,  Pentonville,  and  who,  seven  years  after- 
wards, succeeded  to  the  rectory  of  Clerkenwell.  "  How  beau- 
tiful are  the  feet  of  them  that  preach  the  gospel  of  peace,  and 
bring  glad  tidings  of  good  things !"  Never  did  these  expres- 
sive words  of  the  evangelical  prophet  receive  a  more  striking 
illustration  than  now.  Mr.  Slieppard  was  a  decided  man  of 
God,  and  an  able  minister  of  the  New  Testament.  His  minis- 
try, sound  in  doctrine,  and  richly  experimental  in  its  character, 
was  accompanied  by  an  earnestness  of  spirit,  and  a  persuasive- 
ness of  address,  which  at  once  met  the  peculiar  state  of  mind 
it  was  designed  to  relieve.  Thus  two  individuals  under  the 
especial  guidance  of  God  entered  the  parish  of  Pentonville 
almost  simultaneously.  The  one  was  a  soul  bowed  down  with 
grief  for  sin,  and  who  could  in  nowise  lift  up  herself — the 
other  was  a  messenger  of  peace,  whose  ministry  of  grace  was 
to  loosen  her  bonds,  and  set  her  captive  spirit  free.  For  her 
sake  his  feet  were  guided  thither,  little  divining,  doubtless,  for 
what  especial  intent  his  Master  had  thus  brought  him.  But 
the  narrative  is  best  and  more  fully  told  by  herself: 

"The  change  of  residence  was  pleasant  to  me.  I  was  thrown 
more  amongst  my  friends,  and  for  awhile  my  mind  was  diverted 
from  its  gloom.  We  were  near  the  Chapel  of  Ease.  I  went, 
but  there  was  nothing  to  satisfy  my  soul.  The  minister  had 
been  preaching  here  for  twenty-one  years,  but  now  it  was  the 
Lord's  time  that  he  should  be  removed,  and  that  a  real  shep- 
herd should  take  his  place.  I  went,  and  heard  from  the  new 
minister,  for  the  first  time  in  my  life,  the  precious  gospel  op 
PEACE.  This  was  what  I  had  wanted  to  know  for  many  years, 
that  Jesus  Christ  had  come  into  the  world  to  save  poor  sinners. 
I  was  a  sinner,  and  wanted  to  be  saved.  Oh,  how  eagerly  I 
listened,  and  drank  in  every  word  !  I  had  been  in  vain  trying 
2 


26  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

to  work  out  mj  salvation,  but  my  \voik  always  fell  short,  and 
left  me  as  poor  and  miserable  as  ever.  Now  was  held  out  to 
me  the  hope  that  I  might  be  saved  by  the  work  of  another — the 
work  of  Jesus  Christ.  With  one  observation  of  Mr.  Sheppard  I 
was  much  impressed.  Describing  my  spiritual  state  of  mind 
on  one  occasion  he  most  solemnly  said,  '  If  there  is  such  an 
individual  present,  I  will  pledge  my  soul  for  it  that  that  in- 
dividual is  in  the  way  to  Christ.'  With  this  remark  I  was 
deeply  struck.  I  thought  the  free  invitation  of  the  gospel  he 
was  presenting  must  be  true,  since  this  godly  man  was  willing 
to  risk  his  soul  upon  the  trutli  of  what  he  was  asserting.  Oh, 
if  this  were  true,  I  might  after  all  be  saved  !  My  heart  and 
mind  were  now  at  work.  I  repaired  to  my  Bible,  and  searched 
it  again  and  again.  By  grace  are  ye  saved  through  faiih^  and 
that  not  of  yourselves^  it  is  the  gift  of  God,  was  a  passage  that 
arrested  my  attention.  I  found  that  in  the  Epistle  of  James 
we  were  justified  by  works,  and  my  heart  sank  within  me.  I 
had  no  works,  and  could  do  none  pleasing  and  acceptable  to 
God.  In  the  Epistles  of  Paul  I  read  that  we  were  justified  by 
faith.  There  seemed  a  contradiction.  My  anxious  mind  could 
find  no  rest,  but  still  I  felt  a  ray  of  hope  dawn  upon  my  be- 
nighted soul,  and  continued  to  hear  the  precious  truth  as  one 
hungering  and  thirsting  for  divine  knowledge.  One  night, 
watching  alone  by  the  side  of  a  sick  child,  I  took  my  Bible 
and  searched  the  Scriptures.  The  question  how  the  sinner 
could  be  justified,  pressed  heavily  upon  my  mind.  If  I  could 
be  saved  by  faith  in  the  righteousness  of  another^  then  I  felt 
that  there  was  hope  for  me ;  but  if  there  was  anything  for 
me  to  do  towards  meriting  this  salvation,  I  saw  I  must  be 
forever  lost.  I  read  first  one  epistle  and  then  another,  when 
as  I  read,  the  words  w^ere  brought  to  my  mind,  AsJc,  and  ye 
shall  receive.  I  reasoned,  who  is  it  that  says  this  ?  It  is  God. 
Can  God  lie?  It  is  impossible.  He  must  do  what  he  has' 
said.  He  has  commanded,  Aslc,  and  ye  shall  receive.  I  will 
ask.  I  fell  upon  my  knees  and  pleaded  the  promise.  My 
petition  was  offered  in  the  simple  language  of  an  untutored 
child.  I  knew  nothing  of  Christian  experience,  had  heard  the 
gospel  but  a  few  times,  and  the  only  thing  that  had  fastenad 
itself  upon  my  mind  was  the  truth  that  a  poor  sinner  could  be 
saved.  Thus  I  went  to  God  and  pleaded  the  promise,  asking 
him  how  such  a  wretched  sinner  as  I  was  could  be  s;'v  >d. 
I  did  not  wrestle  so  much  for  my  salvation  as  to  know  hoio  I 


MORNING    OF   JOY.  27 

could  be  saved  as  a  helpless  sinner  that  could  do  nothing.  I 
arose  from  my  knees,  and  again  took  my  Bible.  I  read  and 
compared  scripture  with  scripture,  but  the  one  part  appeared 
to  contradict  the  other,  and  my  mind  was  left  in  darkness  and 
perplexity.  Again  I  carried  the  promise  to  the  throne  of 
grace,  and  again  wrestled  with  the  Lord.  I  returned  to  my 
Bible,  but  it  was  yet  a  sealed  book.  The  third  time  I  ventured 
near  the  Lord,  still  pleading  this  one  gracious  promise,  Ask, 
and  ye  shall  receive.  In  an  instant  light  broke  in  upon  my 
soul.  Jesus  stood  before  me  and  spoke  these  blessed  words, — 
I  AM  THY  SALVATION !  I  hailed  the  glad  tidings — my  heart 
and  soul  responded — Jesus  was  with  me — He  had  himself 
spoken — I  had  seen  the  Lord — had  heard  His  voice — my  soul 
was  saved — my  burden  was  gone — the  grave-clothes  in  which 
I  had  been  so  long  confined  fell  off — my  spirit  was  free,  and  I 
seemed  to  soar  towards  heaven  in  the  sweetest,  richest  enjoy- 
ment— my  heart  filled  with  a  joy  unspeakable.  I  arose  from 
my  knees  to  adore,  and  praise,  and  bless  His  holy  name.  Oh, 
what  a  night  was  that,  never,  never,  to  be  forgotten !  I  had 
seen  Jesus.  It  was  no  vision  of  the  bodily  senses  that  I  saw ; 
but  I  had  no  more  doubt  that  I  was  a  redeemed  and  pardoned 
sinner,  that  I  had  seen  Christ,  and  held  communion  with  Him 
who  died  that  I  might  live,  than  I  had  of  my  own  existence. 
It  was  with  difficulty  I  could  refrain  from  calling  up  the  whole 
house  to  hear  what  the  Lord  had  done  for  my  soul,  I  thought 
all  would  believe  and  rejoice  too,  so  ignorant  was  I.  As  soon 
as  it  was  morning  I  informed  my  husband  of  what  the  Lord 
had  done  for  me.  He  looked  amazed  at  what  I  said,  and 
feared  I  should  lose  my  senses.  I  was  grieved  that  he  did 
not  believe  and  could  not  understand,  and  urged  him,  by  every 
argument  I  could  employ,  to  seek  for  the  same  blessing,  which 
I  was  sure  the  Lord  would  give  him. 

"  It  has  since  been  evident  to  myself,  that  when  the  Holy 
Ghost  gave  me  the  promise  to  plead,  He  also  gave  me  a 
measure  of  faith  to  credit  God  for  its  fulfilment,  and  in  answer- 
ing the  prayer  of  simple  faith,  Christ  came  into  my  soul  with 
a  full  and  free  salvation.  /  am  thy  salvation  !  This  was  good 
news  indeed,  fresh  from  heaven.  Christ  was  mine,  heaven 
was  mine, — all  care  and  sorrow  had  vanished,  and  I  Avas  as 
happy  as  I  could  be  in  the  body.  I  had  found  what  I  had 
long  sought.  I  had  been  in  search  of  real  happiness  for  years, 
and  in  one  night  I  found  it  all  in  Jesus.     God's  richest  tre;is- 


28  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

ury  had  been  thrown  open  to  my  view,  and  in  Him  I  found  all 
I  wanted  for  time  and  eternity.  In  this  happy  frame  I  con- 
tinued many  weeks,  imploring  all  I  knew  and  loved  to  come  to 
Christ,  but  none  understood  me.  I  began  to  think  that  no  one 
knew  Jesus  Christ  but  dear  Mr.  Sheppard  and  myself,  and 
often  felt  that  if  I  had  met  a  chimney  sweep  in  the  street  that 
knew  and  loved  Christ,  I  could  embrace  him  as  a  brother." 

Such  is  the  simple,  glowing  narrative  of  one  upon  whose 
soul  the  Sun  of  Righteousness  had  just  arisen.  In  the  earnest- 
ness of  rehgious  feeling  breathing  through  these  genuine  utter- 
ances of  the  heart,  the  reader  may  trace  the  leading  character- 
istic of  her  subsequent  Christian  life.  That  at  this  early  period 
of  her  new  birth  there  was  much  holy  zeal,  as  yet  unaccom- 
panied with  deep  Christian  experience,  she  always  meekly 
acknowledged.  She  thought  every  mind  would  believe  her 
simple  story,  and  that  every  heart  would  sympathize  with  her 
holy  joy.  She  needed  the  helping  hand  of  an  advanced  Chris- 
tian. It  would  appear,  however,  that  in  the  absence  of  per- 
sonal intercourse  with  living  saints,  she  met  with  the  works  of 
that  eminent  man  of  God,  the  Rev.  John  Newton,  Rector  of 
Olney,  whose  richly  experimental  writings,  clothed  in  beautiful 
simplicity  of  style,  were  admirably  adapted  to  her  state  of 
mind,  and  were  richly  owned  of  God  in  deepening  her  Christian 
knowledge  and  experience.  To  the  latest  period  of  her  life  she 
referred  with  gratitude  to  the  benefit  she  had  derived  from  his 
writings,  and  one  of  the  books  found  in  her  room  after  death 
was  a  volume  of  her  favourite  author,  John  Newton.  The 
foregoing  remarks  are  thus  borne  out  in  her  continued  biog- 
raphy : — 

"  Some  months  after  this  Satan  w^as  permitted  to  try  my 
young  faith,  and  to  cast  a  cloud  over  my  mind.  Unbelief 
began  to  work.  I  feared  I  might  be  mistaken,  as  I  could  meet 
with  none  among  all  my  friends  who  either  understood  what  I 
said,  or  knew  what  I  had  experienced.  Had  I  then  a  matured 
Christian  to  whom  I  could  have  opened  my  heart,  it  would 
have  been  a  great  comfort.  And  yet  it  was  well  it  was  so, 
that  I  might  flee,  not  to  an  arm  of  flesh,  but  to  the  living  God. 
My  mind  was  brought  into  darkness.  The  sensible  presence 
of  Christ  was  withdrawn,  and  sadness  filled  my  heart.  I  sought 
Him  but  found  Him  not ;  I  prayed,  but  received  no  comfort. 
Pacing  my  room  one  day  under  this  dark  dispensation,  and 
fearing  I  never  again  should  enjoy  what  I  once  had,  I  threw 


SPIRITUAL    CONFLICTS.  29 

myself  upon  my  knees,  and  cried  to  the  Lord  to  come  and 
bless  me  if  I  had  not  deceived  myself.  In  a  moment,  in  con- 
descending love,  the  same  precious  Jesus  stood  before  me  as 
He  did  at  the  first,  saying,  O  thou  of  little  faith,  zoherefore  didst 
thou  doubt  f  I  well  recollect  my  answer.  Clasping  my  hands 
in  ecstacy,  I  exclaimed,  '  My  Lord,  and  my  God  !  I  cannot 
and  will  not  doubt;  forgive  my  base  ingratitude.'  Over- 
whelmed with  that  blessed  interview,  I  thought  I  never,  no, 
never  would  doubt  again.  Satan  fled  from  the  presence  of 
the  Lord,  and  I  was  left  alone  with  God, — 7ny  God,  my  own 
God.  I  could  not  tell  my  joy,  and  no  one  understood  my  feel- 
ings. At  this  tim.e  I  became  acquainted  with  the  writings  of 
the  Rev.  John  Newton.  I  read  them  with  great  delight,  and 
if  he  had  been  alive,  I  would  have  walked  miles  to  have  con- 
versed with  him." 

It  was  not  long  before  the  providence  of  God  guided  to  her 
door  the  steps  of  a  deeply-taught,  aged  Christian  in  humble 
life.  To  him  she  opened  her  heart,  and  found  a  warm  response. 
He  kindly  took  her  by  the  hand,  and  in  lowliness  of  mind  she 
yielded  herself  to  his  instructions.  In  a  letter  to  her  mother 
she  thus  refers  to  this  auspicious  circumstance : — 

"I  enclose  you  a  note  from  a  poor  man  addressed  to  me. 
He  is  poor  in  this  Avorld's  goods,  but  rich  in  faith.  He  watches 
over  me  as  a  father  Avould  a  child,  and  I  believe  loves  me  as 
much.  He  visits  me  often,  comforts  and  reproves,  and  en- 
deavours to  build  me  up  in  my  most  holy  faith ;  and  when  he 
cannot  come,  he  writes  to  me.  He  is  a  most  pious,  excellent 
Christian.  His  thoughts  and  whole  heart  are  continually  in 
heaven.     Oh,  that  I  were  but  more  like  him  ! 

It  is  an  interesting  fact,  that  on  her  return  from  abroad 
some  years  afterwards,  she  sought  out  her  early  Christian  in- 
structor, found  him  much  advanced  in  years,  in  ill-health,  and 
the  occupant  of  an  alms-house.  Thither  she  frequently  re- 
paired, bearing  with  her  some  httle  temporal  comfort,  and 
often  receiving  in  return  a  word  of  spiritual  blessing.  She  oc- 
casionally invited  him  to  her  house,  and  administered  to  his 
necessities,  until  the  venerable  pilgrim  exchanged  his  lowly 
abode  on  earth  for  the  many-mansioned  home  of  his  Father  in 
Heaven. 

The  following  letter  addressed  to  her  mother  at  Bermuda, 
with  which  we  close  this  chapter,  whilst  it  confirms  the  pleasing 
fact  of  her  parent's  spiritual  change,  evidences  at  the  same 


80  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

time  the  remarkable  clearness  and  growth  of  her  own  views 
of  divine  truth ;  and  in  the  illness  of  her  husband,  to  which  it 
refers,  foreshadows  those  trying  dispensations  which  afterwards 
gave  such  maturity  to  her  Christianity,  and  rendered  her  so 
extensively  useful  in  comforting  others  with  the  comfort  with 
which  she  herself  had  been  comforted  of  God  : — 

"  My  dearest  Mother,  October  22,  1810. 

"...  Thank  God  you  are  all  well ;  but  above 
all  things,  I  desire  to  thank  and  bless  His  holy  name  that  you 
and  Bella  are  so  wonderfully  brought  to  know  yourselves,  and 
to  know  Him  whom  to  know  is  life  everlasting.  Blessed  be 
God,  who  passes  by  so  many,  and  who  has  deigned  to  look 
upon  us  who  were  lying  as  others,  dead  in  sin.  Infinite  in 
sovereignty,  infinite  in  goodness,  infinite  in  power  !  why  He 
passes  by  some  and  calls  others,  is  only  known  to  Himself; 
but  there  is  a  time  coming  when  we  shall  know  even  as  we 
are  known,  and  be  enabled  to  see  that  He  acts  consistently 
with  his  goodness  and  mercy.  All  we  have  to  do  in  this  vale 
of  tears  is  to  press  forward  to  the  glorious  prize  He  has 
placed  in  our  view,  looking  continually  to  Jesus,  trusting  not 
to  our  own  strength,  but  waiting  in  humble  dependence  upon 
Him  for  all  our  sufficiency  to  carry  us  on,  and  to  enable  us  to 
hold  out  unto  the  end.  He  that  has  promised  is  true  and 
faithful  to  His  w^ord.  Oh,  that  we  may  be  found  like  His  be- 
loved handmaiden  of  old,  sitting  at  His  feet.  His  eye  is  ever 
upon  His  dear,  dependent  flock ;  He  knows  all  our  need,  and 
has  promised  to  supply  it.  But  for  these  things  He  will  be 
inquired  of.  It  is  at  a  throne  of  grace  Jesus  makes  Himself 
known  to  His  saints,  comforts  them,  revives  their  drooping 
spirits  with  a  view  of  those  blessings  He  has  in  store  for  them. 
This  world  is  not  our  home — we  look  for  a  better.  His  people 
are  pilgrims  here  on  earth,  and  generally  are  a  poor  and  af- 
flicted people.  They  have  not  their  portion  here  as  thousands 
have, —their  portion  is  to  come.  Their  names  are  w^ritten  in 
the  book  of  life,  and  were  written  before  the  foundation  of 
the  world.  They  are  as  dear  to  Him  as  the  apple  of  His  eye. 
Then  what  have  we  to  fear?  nothing;  but  everything  to  hope. 
Blessed  be  God  who  sent  His  only  Son  to  pay  our  debt,  to 
rescue  us  from  the  power  of  Satan,  to  cleanse  us  from  all  our 
guilt,  to  clothe  our  souls  with  His  righteousness,  and  thereby 
give  us  a  rightful  claim  to  a  crovxai  of  glory.     Blessed  be  that 


LETTER   TO    HER    MOTHER.  31 

dear  Son  who  condescended  to  come  amongst  us,  to  assume 
our  nature,  and  to  do  for  us  what  we  had  no  power  to  do  for 
ourselves.  And  blessed  be  the  Holy  Spirit,  who  in  infinite 
mercy  forms  and  prepares  us  for  the  heavenly  kingdom.     I 

am  dehghted  to  find  dear  B has  such  clear  views  of  the 

doctrine  of  the  Atonement.  And  oh,  that  they  may  reach 
her  heart,  and  influence  all  her  thoughts,  words,  and  actions. 
My  last  letter  will  have  informed  you  that  the  children's  ill- 
ness was  occasioned  by  the  measles,  and  my  precious  husband's 
from  a  rupture  of  a  blood-vessel  in  the  lungs.  These  things 
altogether,  have  been  a  severe  trial  to  mind  and  body,  but  I 
have  been  in  a  most  wonderful  manner  supported  under  them. 
I  have  gone  through  enough  to  kill  a  dozen  women  stronger 
than  myself;  but  the  Lord  has  fulfilled  the  promise,  and  given 
me  strength  according  to  my  day. 

"  On  Monday  evening  I  heard  a  very  popular  minister, 
who  was  to  preach  at  a  chapel  in  Lincoln's  Inn  Fields.  I 
waited  some  time  until  the  doors  were  opened,  and  then  ob- 
tained a  seat  near  the  pulpit.  But  although  the  place  was 
large,  every  part  was  densely  crowded,  and  people  standing 
in  the  aisles.  The  preacher  was  Alexander  Fletcher,  from 
Scotland,  a  young  man  of  about  twenty-two.  But  oh,  how 
zealous,  fervent,  and  inexpressibly  great  and  sweet  in  ex- 
plaining the  glad  tidings  of  salvation  !  His  discourse  was 
addressed  to  children  particularly,  and  he  has  such  uncommon 
power  in  directing  and  fixing  the  attention  of  both  old  and 
young,  that  I  do  not  believe  the  eyes  of  either  were  off  him 
during  the  whole  service.  This  good  steward  of  Jesus  preaches 
almost  every  evening  in  some  part  or  other  of  London.  Oh, 
when  I  see  such  servants  of  the  Lord  spending  their  strength, 
their  lives,  their  all  for  God,  and  counting  it  nothing  so  that 
they  might  win  Christ,  I  look  at  myself  and  mourn  over  my 
unprofitableness,  and  desire  to  lie  low  in  the  dust.  This  good, 
zealous  man  of  God,  though  followed  by  crowds,  appears 
humble  and  lowly,  like  his  blessed  Master.  Oh,  my  dear 
mamma,  how  I  long  to  have  you  with  me,  where  you  may 
hear  the  blessed  gospel  preached  in  a  thousand  places.  How 
precious  it  is  in  the  ear  of  the  redeemed  !  It  is  the  soul's  food, 
and  we  grow  lean  and  lukewarm  without  it.  May  every  cove- 
nant blessing  attend  you,  is  the  prayer  of  your  affectionate 
daughter,  M.   W." 


CHAPTEK    III. 

The  earnest  and  practical  character  of  her  religion  soon  be- 
came apparent.  The  yearning  of  her  heart  for  the  spiritual 
well-being  of  others,  which  now  appeared,  was  not  less  the 
natural  outflow  of  her  new-born  feelings  than  the  forecastings 
of  her  future  devotedness.  The  fervent  zeal  to  which  her 
Christianity  gave  birth,  and  which  was  but  now  in  the  first 
pantings  of  its  inspiration,  she  retained  in  all  its  bloom  until 
death.  It  was  natural  that  those  of  her  own  house  should  oc- 
cupy her  first  thoughts,  and  share  her  deepest  sympathies.  As 
a  follower  of  Christ,  she  stood  alone  in  her  family.  She  felt 
her  responsibility  and  resolved  to  act.  Her  first  step  in  carry- 
ing out  this  her  solemn  resolution  to  serve  the  Lord  was  the 
erection,  of  what  until  now  had  no  place  in  her  domestic  circle 
— a  family  altar  to  God.  The  accomplishment  of  her  purpose 
demanded  no  little  moral  courage,  wisdom,  and  firmness.  The 
proposal  was  submitted  to  her  husband,  and  though  kindly, 
was  yet  strongly  opposed.  But  the  conviction  of  duty  was  too 
deep  to  be  overcome.  The  energy  of  will,  and  the  remarkable 
grace  which  in  after  years  confronted  and  vanquished  difficul- 
ties in  the  way  of  duty  more  formidable,  and  which  bore  her 
through  trials  yet  more  severe,  crovvmed  this  her  first  work  and 
testimony  for  God  with  the  most  pleasing  success.  Consent 
was  at  length  given ;  the  effort  was  made  in  God's  strength, 
and  God  blessed  it.  The  family  and  household  were  convened 
for  what  to  them  was  a  novel  yet  impressive  service.  Her 
husband,  at  first  declining  to  be  present,  was  there.  She  con- 
ducted the  service,  read  a  portion  of  God's  word,  and  then  all 
but  one  of  that  circle  knelt  while  she  offered  solemn  prayer, — 
the  father  of  that  worshipping  family  alone  stood.  But  when 
again  they  assembled,  that  heart  was  subdued,  its  hostility  dis- 
armed, and  side  by  side  with  his  wife  and  little  ones  he  bent 
the  knee  before  their  Father  in  heaven.  From  this  moment 
(32) 


FAMILY   WORSHIP.  33 

the  fire  enkindled  on  that  domestic  altar  never  went  out. 
Whether  at  home  or  abroad,  journeying  on  the  land,  or  voy- 
aging upon  the  sea,  family  prayer  was  never  omitted.  "As 
for  me  and  my  house,  we  will  serve  the  Lord,"  was  a  holy 
resolve  with  which  no  other  engagements  ever  were  allowed 
to  interfere.  From  the  commencement  of  her  Christian  course 
until  its  close,  her  grand  and  single  aim  was  to  live  for  God. 
To  Him  her  first  thoughts,  first  time,  first  duties  were  given. 
All  other  and  secondary  calls,  duties,  and  claims  were  held  in 
stern  abeyance.  "Seek  jq  first  the  kingdom  of  God  and  His 
righteousness,"  was  the  precept  in  which  she  undeviatingly 
walked,  leaving  God  to  fulfil  as  most  faithfully  he  did,  the 
promise  with  which  it  is  annexed,  "  and  all  things  else  shall 
be  added  unto  you."  Happy  if  her  holy  example— the  exam- 
ple of  one  ever  conscious  of  her  own  weakness,  yet  knowing 
wherein  her  great  strength  lay — shall  confirm  the  wavering 
purpose,  or  encourage  the  hesitating  heart  of  some  feeble,  timid 
witness  for  the  Lord.  Alas !  how  many  professedly  Christian 
households  are  there  without  a  family  altar,  simply  because 
there  are  no  hands  in  that  circle  strong  enough  in  faith  to  rear 
it,  and  no  hearts  fervent  enouo-h  in  love  to  light  its  sacred  fires. 
But  how  grievous  the  twofold  sin, — first,  the  neglect  of  a  sacred 
and  binding  duty ;  and  then  to  limit,  in  its  performance,  the 
promised  grace  and  strength  of  the  Holy  One  of  Israel !  The 
believer  should  ever  remember,  that  God  has  enjoined  no  pre- 
cept unaccompanied  by  a  promise ;  and  that  it  is  only  as  we 
are  found  walking  in  filial,  unreserved  obedience  to  the  one, 
that  he  is  found  faithfully  and  fully  performing  the  other. 
Christ  enjoins  upon  His  disciples  no  yoke,  and  imposes  no  bur- 
den— calls  to  no  service,  and  sends  no  trial — for  which  He 
does  not  vouchsafe  all  requisite  aid.  "  My  grace  is  sufficient 
for  thee,"  is  a  promise  which  embraces  in  its  illimitable  range 
every  member,  and  all  the  circumstances  of  each  member,  of 
the  household  of  faith.  Looking,  then,  to  Him,  "  Let  the 
weak  say  I  am  strong:"  let  the  timid  "glory  in  their  infirmi- 
ties ;"  and  let  those  who  are  cast  down  exclaim,  "  In  the  Lord 
have  I  righteousness  and  strength."  Apposite  to  these  re- 
marks is  the  following  extract  from  one  of  her  letters  to  her 
mother : — 

"Do  you,  my  dearest  mamma,  have  family  prayer?    I  hope 

you  do,     B and  you  are  of  one  mind,  and  when  only  two 

or  three  meet  together  to  worship  God,  He  has  promised  to  be 
2* 


34  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

amongst  them.  He  has  not  said  to  the  seeking  seed  of  Israel, 
Seek  ye  my  face  in  vain.  How  pleasing  it  is  to  the  Lord 
when  we  are  enabled,  in  spite  of  an  ensnaring  world,  to  erect 
an  altar  to  Him  in  our  house,  and  say  with  Joshua,  As  for  me 
and  my  house,  we  will  serve  the  Lord.  Call  the  servants  to- 
gether, read  a  portion  of  Scripture,  and  go  to  prayer.  If  you 
have  not  yet  been  able  to  do  this,  I  hope  you  will  do  it.  Let 
the  wicked  laugh  ;  let  them  call  you  by  what  names  they  may ; 
be  not  afraid,  for  more  are  they  icho  are  for  you,  than  those  who 
are  against  you.  You  have  all  the  saints  on  earth,  and  all  the 
saints  in  glory,  and  all  the  angels  in  heaven,  and  best  of  all, 
God  Himself  on  your  side.  And  if  God  be  for  you,  who  can 
be  against  you  ?  You  fight  under  a  good  Captain,  the  Cap- 
tain of  your  salvation,  who  will  make  you  more  than  con- 
queror. I  would  earnestly  recommend  to  you  extempore 
prayer.  Lay  aside  your  forms  of  prayer,  and  the  Lord  Him- 
self will  teach  you  to  pray  from  the  heart.  The  blessed  Spirit 
has  promised  to  help  our  infirmities  in  prayer." 

Among  the  first  general  objects  which  enlisted  her  Chris- 
tian sympathies  and  efforts,  was  the  spiritual  condition  of  her 
own  native  isle.  In  St.  George,  the  metropolis  of  the  Bermu- 
das— a  beautiful  group  of  islands  bestudding  the  bosom  of  the 
Atlantic  ocean — there  still  resided  her  mother,  and  a  wide  cir- 
cle of  kindred  and  friends.  God  had  done  much,  in  point  of 
natural  scenery  and  salubrity  of  climate,  for  the  Bermudas. 
Few  spots  in  this  beautiful,  though  fallen  creation,  concentrate 
so  much  varied  loveliness,  and  of  so  high  a  tone,  as  do  these 
isles  of  the  sea.  Poetry,  in  some  of  her  sweetest,  if  not  her 
most  truthful  strains,  has  often  sung  their  praises ;  while  his- 
tory, with  perhaps  more  stern  fidelity,  has  awarded  them  an 
honourable  page  in  its  no  less  interesting  annals.  Nor  to  poetry 
and  history  alone  are  the  Bermudas  indebted  for  their  fame. 
Invalids  from  distant  climes,  attenuated  by  disease,  and  aban- 
doned by  hope,  who  have  repaired  to  these  islands,  seeking 
but  to  eke  out  an  enfeebled  existence  yet  a  little  longer,  and 
to  meet  death  with  mitigated  suffering,  have,  beneath  their 
soft  skies,  and  fanned  by  their  balmy  breezes,  been  restored  to 
perfect  health ;  and  lived,  either  to  settle  permanently  in  the 
island,  or  to  return  to  the  homes  they  expected  to  have  quitted 
for  ever.  Nor  were  the  Bermudas  less  renowned  for  the  gener- 
ous kindness  and  boundless  hospitality  of  their  native  inhabi- 
tants, than  for  the   romantic  loveliness  of  their  scenery.     No 


ANDREW   MARVEL.  35 

consumptive  ever  landed  upon  their  shores  in  quest  of  health 
— no  tourist  ever  came  to  explore  their  beauties — no  wayfar- 
ing mariner  was  ever  stranded  upon  their  rocks,  who  met  not 
here  a  friend,  and  found  not  here  a  home.  The  only  rivalry 
that  existed  was, — who  should  show  most  kindness  to  the 
stranger.* 

But  lovely  and  fertile  as  these  fairy  islands  were,  and  still 
more  attractive  the  native  character  of  their  inhabitants,  the 
early  history  of  the  Bermudas  does  not  appear  to  furnish  any 
clear  or  authentic  evidence  that  evangelical  religion  had  ever 
very  extensively  prevailed.  And  yet,  if  we  may  credit  An- 
drew Marvel,  of  the  Commonweath — one  of  the  greatest  wits 
and  statesmen  of  his  age,  and  a  Christian  poet,  too,  of  no  mean 
worth — it  would  seem  that  the  Bermuda  islands  afforded  an 
asylum  to  some  of  the  Puritans  from  the  tyranny  which  drove 
so  many  to  seek  in  other  lands  the  liberty  of  conscience  denied 
them  in  their  own.f      But,  if  this  be  true,  the  piety  which 

*  "Waller,  in  his  "  Summer  Islands,"  a  poem  of  exquisite  beauty,  thus 
portrays  this  salubrious  clime  : — 

"  For  the  kind  spring  (which  but  salutes  us  here) 
Inhabits  these,  and  courts  them  all  the  year  ; 
Ripe  fruits  and  blossoms  on  the  same  trees  live, 
At  once  they  promise,  and  at  once  they  give. 
So  sweet  the  air,  so  moderate  the  clime, 
None  sickly  lives,  or  dies  before  his  time. 
Heaven  sure  has  kept  this  spot  of  earth  uncursed, 
To  show  how  all  things  were  created  first." 

t  This  historical  fact  is  embodied  iu  the  following  poem,  entitled 
"Bermudas,"  composed  by  Andrew  Marvel,  and  pubhshed  about  the 
year  1661,  It  is  supposed  to  be  a  chant  of  the  Puritans  who  fled  to 
these  islands:  — 

"  Where  the  remote  Bermudas  ride 

In  the  ocean's  bosom,  unespied, 

Prom  a  small  boat  that  rowed  along, 

The  list'ning  winds  received  this  song : 
"  •  What  should  we  do  but  sing  His  praise, 

That  led  us  through  the  wat'ry  maze, 

Unto  an  isle  so  long  unknown, 

And  yet  far  kinder  than  our  own  ? 

Where  He  the  huge  sea-monsters  wracks, 

'J  hat  lift  the  deep  upon  their  backs. 

He  lands  us  on  a  grassy  stage, 

Safe  from  the  storm's  and  prelates'  rage ; 

He  gave  us  this  eternal  spring, 

Which  here  enamels  everything ; 


36  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

these  holy  refugees  enkindled,  in  course  of  time,  either  expired 
altogether,  or  lived  only  in  the  smouldering  embers  which 
faintly  glowed  beneath  the  cold,  deadening  forms  of  a  preva- 
lent but  lifeless  religion.  Yet  God  had  purposes  of  mercy 
towards  these  islands,  which  He  was  about  now  to  unfold. 
It  was  on  the  15th  of  March,  1748,  that  the  Rev.  George 

And  sends  the  fowls  to  us  in  care, 
On  daily  visits  through  the  air ; 
He  hangs  in  shades  the  orange  bright, 
Like  golden  lamps  in  a  green  night ; 
And  does  in  the  pomegranate  close 
Jewels  more  rich  tlian  Ormus  shows. 
He  makes  the  figs  our  mouths  to  meet, 
And  throws  the  melons  at  our  feet : 
But  apple  plants  of  such  a  price, 
No  tree  could  ever  bear  them  twice. 
"With  cedars,  chosen  by  His  hand, 
From  Lebanon,  he  stores  the  land, 
And  makes  the  hollow  seas  that  roar, 
Proclaim  the  ambergrease  on  shore. 
He  cast  (of  which  we  rather  boast) 
The  gospel's  pearl  upon  this  coast, 
And  in  their  rocks  for  us  did  frame 
A  temple  where  to  sound  His  name. 
Oh  !  let  our  voice  His  praise  exalt, 
Till  it  arise  at  heaven's  vault, 
"Which,  then  (perhaps)  rebounding,  may 
Echo  beyond  the  Mexique  Bay.' 

"  Thus  sang  they  in  the  English  boat, 
An  holy  and  a  cheerful  note ; 
And  all  the  way,  to  guide  their  chime, 
With  falhng  oars  they  kept  the  time." 

Works  of  Andrew  Marvel,  by  Captain  Edmund  Thompson, 
3  vols.  1776. 

There  is,  perhaps,  no  man  whose  name  deserves  to  be  held  in  more 
sacred  veneration,  by  those  to  whom  the  memory  of  the  Puritans  is  dear, 
than  Andrew  Marvel.  He  occupied  an  illustrious  niche  in  the  history 
of  his  times.  His  father  was  a  clergyman  of  great  learning  and  of  high 
repute.  He  met  an  affecting  and  untimely  death.  Crossing  a  river  with 
a  bridal  party,  for  whom  he  was  about  to  officiate,  a  sudden  squall  arose, 
and  the  entire  group,  including  the  young  and  beautiful  bride,  perished. 
The  son,  Andrew,  who  appeared  to  inherit  much  of  his  father's  gifts, 
was  educated  at  Cambridge,  and  afterwards  represented  Forkington- 
upon-HuU  in  Parliament,  was  secretary  to  the  English  Embassy  at  Con- 
stantinople, and  Assistant  Latin  Secretary  to  Milton,  under  Cromwell. 
To  him  the  blind  bard  was  indebted  for  the  early  popularity  oi"  his  sub- 
lime poem.     Finding  "  Paradise  Lost,"  the  copyright  of  wliich  Milton 


WHITFIELD — HIS    VISIT   TO    BERMUDA.  37 

Whitfield,  the  great  apostle  of  his  age,  landed  in  Bermuda. 
He  had  arrived  from  New  York,  with  impaired  health,  borne 
down  with  anxiety  and  toil,  seeking  amidst  the  loveliness  and 
tranquillity  of  these  enchanting  isles  a  few  weeks'  bodily  and 
mental  rest  from  his  exhausting  labours.  An  entire  stranger, 
ill,  and  depressed,  his  reception  was  worthy  of  the  people, 
and  soothing  to  his  lone  feelings ;  it  was  kind,  sympathizing, 
and  hospitable.  Whitfield  was  pleased  with  the  beauties  of 
the  place,  and  charmed  with  the  simplicity  and  friendship  of 
the  inhabitants.  A  rapid  survey  of  the  spiritual  condition  of 
the  population  was  sufficient  to  convince  this  zealous  minister 
of  Christ  that  an  extended  field  of  evangelical  labour,  white 
to  the  harvest,  Avas  spread  out  before  him.  Enfeebled  by  ill- 
ness, and  oppressed  by  care,  though  he  was,  his  mighty  soul 
was  stirred  within  him,  and  he  yearned  to  proclaim  throughout 
that  lovely  group  the  unsearchable  riches  of  Christ.  Scarcely 
allowing  himself  a  week's  repose,  he  commenced  his  mission. 
The  pulpits  of  the  parish  churches  being  closed  against  him 
by  a  law  of  the  island,  which  recpired  a  license  from  home, 
and  which  the  Governor  would  fain  have  relaxed  in  his  favour, 
he  preached  to  large,  attentive,  and  affected  auditors  in  the 
Presbyterian  pulpit,  in  the  Town-house  of  St.  George's,  in 
private  dwellings,  and  in  the  open  air.  The  immediate  result 
was  what  might  have  been  anticipated  from  the  ministry  of 
Whitfield.  Everywhere  from  the  highest  to  the  lowest, — from 
the  Executive  to  the  most  ignorant  slave  in  the  island, — society 
was  moved  to  its  centre,  as  by  one  mighty  impulse,  on  the 
subject  of  religion.  A  general  and  powerful  awakening 
transpired.  Crowds  were  attracted  to  his  ministry — his  word 
was  with  power — and  multitudes  were  profoundly  impressed, 
and  not  a  few  hopefully  converted.  Such  an  outpouring  of 
God's   Spirit,    such   a    revival  of    evangelical  religion,   those 

had  just  sold  for  fifteen  pounds,  remained  unhonoured  and  unknown,  Mar- 
vel wrote  a  complimentary  poem  on  its  publication,  which  at  once  un- 
veiled its  beauties  to  the  undiscerning  eye  of  the  public,  and  brought  it 
into  notice.  He  was  a  man  of  great  integrity  of  principle,  and  of  extra- 
ordinary moral  courage.  Of  him  it  was  said  hy  an  historian  of  his  day, 
"  He  had  the  courage  to  attack  arbitrary  government  in  the  reign  of  a 
tyrant,  and  to  attempt  to  defend  the  Protestant  church  when  the  head 
of  it  died  a  Papist."  Some  poc-t  thus  refers  to  two  of  the  greatest  men 
of  his  day: 

"  'Tis  Marvel  braves  the  wicked  acts  of  kings  ; 
But  what  the  Muses  dictate — Milton  sings." 


38  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

islands  had,  perhaps,  never  before  witnessed.  Amongst  the 
first  to  welcome  Mr.  Whitfield  to  Bermuda,  and  to  offer  the 
hospitality  of  his  house,  was  Dr.  George  Forbes,  the  grand- 
father of  the  subject  of  this  memoir.  He  received  the  inter- 
esting stranger  to  his  home,  paid  him  the  most  courteous 
attention,  and  employed  his  influence  in  obtaining  the  Council 
Chamber  for  his  use,  in  which  the  Governor,  several  of  the 
council,  the  clergymen  of  the  parish,  and  a  number  of  the 
townspeople  assembled  in  the  most  devout  order  to  hear  the 
message  of  salvation  from  his  lips.  The  reader  will  gather  a 
better  idea  of  the  remarkable  success  of  Mr.  Whitfield's  labours 
in  Bermuda,  during  which  he  preached  generally  twice  a  day 
for  a  month,  from  the  extracts  given  below,  selected  from  his 
own  private  journal.* 

*  "  Wednesday,  April  6.     After  sermon  Dr.  Forbes  and  Mr.  P , 

the  Collector,  desired  me  to  favour  them  and  the  gentlemen  of  the  town 
with  my  company  to  dine  with  them.  I  accepted  the  invitation.  The 
Governor,  the  President,  and  Judge  Bascombe  were  there.  All  won- 
dered at  my  speaking  so  freely  and  fluently  witliout  notes.  At  table 
liis  Excellency  introduced  somethhig  of  religion,  by  asking  me  the  mean- 
uig  of  the  word  •  hades.'  Several  other  things  were  started  about  free 
will,  Adam's  fall,  predestination,  &c.,  to  all  which  God  enabled  me  to 
answer  so  pertinently,  and  taught  me  to  mix  the  utile  and  dulce  so  to- 
gether, that  all  at  table  seemed  highly  pleased,  shook  me  by  the  hand, 
and  invited  me  to  their  respective  houses.  The  Governor,  in  particular, 
asked  me  to  dine  with  him  on  the  morrow ;  and  Dr.  Forbes,  one  of  his 
particular  intimates,  invited  me  to  drink  tea  in  the  afternoon.  I  thanked 
all,  returned  proper  respects,  and  went  to  my  lodgings  with  some  degree 
of  thankfulness  for  the  assistance  afforded  me,  but  awed  before  God  at 
the  consideration  of  my  unspeakable  unvvorthiness.  In  the  afternoon, 
about  five  o'clock,  I  expounded  the  parable  of  the  prodigal  son  to 
many  people  at  a  private  house,  and  in  the  evening  had  liberty  to  speak 
freely  and  closely  to  those  that  supped  with  me.  Oh,  that  this  may  be 
the  beginning  of  good  gospel  times  to  the  inhabitants  of  this  town  ! 
Lord,  teach  me  to  deal  prudently  with  them,  and  cause  them  to  melt 
under  Thy  word. 

"  Sunday,  17.  God  still  magnifies  His  power  and  goodness  more  and 
more.  This  morning  we  had  a  plea.siug  sight  in  Mr.  Paul's  meeting- 
house. T  began  to  preach,  and  tlie  people  to  be  affected  as  in  days  of 
old  at  home.  Indeed,  the  prospect  is  encouraging.  '  Praise  the  Lord, 
0  my  soul.' 

"  May  7.  In  my  conversation,  these  two  days,  with  some  of  my 
friends,  I  was  diverted  much  in  hearing  several  things  that  passed  among 
the  poor  negroes  since  my  preaching  to  them  last  Sunday. 

"  One  of  the  number,  it  seems,  said,  '  that  if  the  book  I  preached  out 
of  was  the  best  book  that  was  ever  bought,  and  came  out  of  London,  she 
was  sure  it  had  never  all  that  in  it  which  I  spoke  to  the  negroes.'     Tho 


WHITFIELD — HIS   SUCCESSFUL   LABOURS.  39 

"Laden  with  abundance  of  prayers  and  blessings,"  to  use 
his  own  words,  Whitfield  bade  farewell  to  Bermuda  and  its 
generous  inhabitants,  bearing  with  him,  as  the  expression  of 
their  grateful  love,  ample  provisions  for  his  voyage,  and  up- 
old  man  who  spoke  out  last  Sunday  and  said,  '  Yes,  Sir,'  when  I  asked 
them  whether  all  the  negroes  would  not  go  to  heaven,  being  questioned 
by  somebody  why  he  spoke  out  so.  answered,  '  that  the  gentleman  put 
the  question  once  or  twice  to  them,  and  the  other  fools  had  not  the  man- 
ners to  make  me  any  answer,  till  at  last  I  seemed  to  point  at  him,  and 
he  was  ashamed  that  nobody  should  answer  me,  and  therefore  he  did.' 
Another,  wondering  why  I  said  negroes  had  black  hearts,  was  answered 
by  his  black  brother  thus  ;  '  Ah  !  thou  fool  dost  not  thou  understand  it  ? 
he  means  black  with  sin.'  From  all  which  I  infer  that  the  Bermuda 
negroes  are  more  knowing  than  I  supposed;  that  their  consciences  are 
awake,  and  consequently  prepared,  in  a  good  measure,  for  hearing  the 
gospel  preached  unto  them. 

"  Sundaj^  May  15.  '  Praise  the  Lord.  0  my  soul,  and  all  that  is 
within  me  praise  His  holy  name!'  This  morning  I  preaclied  my  fare- 
well sermon  at  Mr.  Paul's  meeting-house ;  it  was  quite  full,  and  as  the 
President  said,  above  a  hundred  and  fifty  whites,  besides  blacks,  were 
round  the  house.  Attention  sat  on  every  face  ;  and  when  I  came  to 
take  my  leave,  oh,  what  a  sweet  unaffected  weeping  was  there  to  be 
seen  everywhere.  I  believe  there  were  few  dry  eyes.  The  negroes, 
likewise,  without  doors,  I  heard,  wept  ])lentifully.  My  own  heart  was 
affected,  and  though  I  have  parted  from  friends  so  often,  yet  I  find  every 
fresh  parting  almost  unmans  me,  and  very  much  affects  my  heart !  Sure- 
ly a  great  work  is  begun  in  some  souls  at  Bermuda  !  Carry  it  on.  O 
Lord,  and  if  it  be  thy  will,  send  me  to  those  dear  people  again.  Even 
so,  Lord  Jesus.     Amen. 

"Sunday,  May  22.  Blessed  be  God!  the  little  leaven  thrown  into 
the  three  measures  of  meal  begins  to  ferment,  and  work  almost  every 
day  for  the  week  past.  I  have  conversed  with  souls  loaded  with  a  sense 
of  their  sins,  and  as  far  as  I  can  judge,  really  pricked  to  tlieir  heart.  I 
preached  only  three  times,  but  to  almost  three  larger  auditories  than 
usual.  Indeed  the  fields  are  wliite,  ready  unto  harvest.  God  has  been 
pleased  to  bless  private  visits.  Go  where  I  will,  upon  the  least  notice, 
bouses  are  crowded,  and  the  poor  souls  that  Ibllow  are  soon  drenched 
in  tears.  This  day  I  took,  as  it  were,  another  farewell.  As  the  ship 
did  not  sail,  I  preached  at  Somerset  in  the  morning,  to  a  large  congre- 
gation in  the  fields,  and  expounded  in  the  evening  to  as  large  a  one  at 
Mr.  Harvey's  house,  round  which  stood  many  hundreds  of  people.  But 
in  the  morning  and  evening  how  did  the  poor  souls  weep!  The  Lord 
seemed  to  be  with  me  in  a  peculiar  manner.  After  the  service,  when  I 
lay  down  on  the  bed  to  rest,  many  came  weeping  bitterly  round  me,  and 
took  their  last  farewell.  Though  my  body  was  very  weak,  yet  my  .soul 
was  full  of  comfort.  I  magnified  the  Lord,  and  my  spirit  rejoiced  in  God 
my  Saviour.  Abundance  of  prayers  and  blessings  were  put  up  for  my 
safe  passage  to  England,  and  speedy  return  to  Bermuda  again.  May 
they  enter  into  the  ears  of  the  Lord  of  SabaothI" — Whitfield's  Joiinal. 


40  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

wards  of  one  liunclred  pounds  for  his  Orphan  House,  the  spon- 
taneous contributions  of  several  parishes  where  he  had  preached 
the  word.  The  traces  of  his  labours  existed  for  many  years 
afterwards ;  and  although,  in  process  of  time,  this  powerful  re- 
vival was  succeeded  by  a  sad  relapse  into  religious  formalism, 
both  in  the  pulpit  and  amongst  the  people,  yet  the  seed  then 
sown  by  this  prince  of  preachers  still  bore  fruit.  Amongst  the 
converts  of  his  ministry  appears  to  have  been  an  aunt  of  Mrs. 
Winslow,  a  family  tradition  of  whom  still  existed,  that  her 
favourite  and  frequent  exclamation  was,  "  Oh,  for  more  grace  ! " 
Alas !  that  a  declension  so  melancholy  should  have  followed  a 
spiritual  awakening  so  gracious.  But  God  had  not  left  Him- 
self without  a  witness.  There  still  existed  a  little  remnant 
who  preserved  the  coal  unquenched.  The  occasional  visit  of 
a  gospel  minister  in  quest  of  health,  or  in  the  providence  of 
God,  driven  upon  the  island  by  stress  of  weather,  helped  to 
keep  alive  the  smouldering  embers  of  vital  religion.  This 
feeble  band,  who  may  be  regarded  as  the  conservators  of  evan- 
gelical piety  in  Bermuda,  were  wont  to  assemble  statedly  for 
public  worship,  one  of  their  number  generally  reading  a  dis- 
course from  ''  Burder's  Village  Sermons."  It  was  to  meet  this 
spiritual  destitution  that  the  thoughts  of  Mrs.  Winslow,  as  ex- 
pressed in  the  following  letters  to  her  mother,  were  directed  : — 
"August,  1813.  I  am  trying  very  hard  to  send  you  a 
dear  gospel  minister  to  be  settled  in  St.  George's ;  and  I  do 
earnestly  entreat  that  you  all  will  endeavour,  if  I  succeed  in 
obtaining  one,  to  procure  him  a  place  to  preach  in  until  he  is 
enabled  to  build  a  chapel.  The  Lord  has  blessed  me,  and  I 
think  I  am  called  in  duty  to  lay  out  what  He  has  given  me 
for  His  glorj',  I  think  I  can  spare  fifty  pounds  a  year  to  aid 
the  minister  until  he  is  sufficiently  established,  and  draws 
around  him  a  cons-rea-ation  who  will  be  able  to  afford  him  a 
proper  mamtenance.  I  have  employed  several  dear  minis- 
ters to  inquire  for  one  who  may  be  made  a  blessing  to  you  all. 
Now,  I  wish  to  hear  from  you,  just  to  know  whether  you  can 
obtain  a  place  for  him  to  preach  in,  and  whether  you  can  raise 
a  subscription  to  pay  its  expenses  until  I  am  enabled  to  build 
a  chapel ;  for  I  mean  to  build  one  myself,  in  God's  good  time  ; 
and  I  trust  some  of  my  own  children  will  stand  up  in  it,  preach- 
ing, from  heartfelt  experience,  the  unsearchable  riches  of 
Christ,  when  you  and  I,  my  precious  mother,  will  be  admiring 
and  adoring  the  same  Jesus  in  eternity.     All  things  are  pos- 


EFFORTS   TO   OBTAIN   A   MINISTER   FOR   BERMUDA.      41 

sible  with  our  God ;  and  great  are  my  expectations  from  Him. 
He  has  put  large  desires  in  my  heart,  and  has  promised  in  His 
own  word  to  fulfil  them.  You  must  give  me  a  part  of  the 
garden,  if  you  think  proper;  or,  if  that  cannot  be,  I  must 
purchase  a  piece  of  ground  in  the  town.  A  chapel  must  be 
built  where  my  God  will  be  glorified  and  souls  won  to  Christ. 
Oh,  that  you  knew  how  He  blesses  my  soul,  and  how  much 
He  reveals  His  tender  love  to  me,  so  that  there  are  moments 
when  I  am  hfted  above  the  world  and  feel  next  door  to  heaven  ! 

"My  dear  Mother, — I  cannot  express  to  you,  though  I 
hope  you  feel  it  also,  the  comfort  and  consolation  I  derive 
from  seeing  my  eternal  interest  in  Christ  and  in  the  love  of 
God  as  my  Covenant  Father.  How  great,  how  unspeakably 
great  are  our  privileges,  and  how  glorious  the  prospect  we 
have  before  us !  Jesus  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  those 
who  put  their  trust  in  Him.  I  have  been  praying  much  for 
you  all  lately,  with  respect  to  your  spiritual  welfare,  that  the 
Lord  would  fill  your  hearts  with  peace  and  joy  in  believing, 
and  lift  you  above  this  poor,  fleeting,  perishing  world.  I  am 
doing  my  utmost  to  get  you  a  minister,  but  none  are  willing 
to  leave  their  native  land."      At  a  later  date  she  adds : — 

"  I  am  doing  my  best  to  procure  a  minister  to  send  to  you, 
but  I  find  it  more  "difficult  than  I  expected,  as  those  who  are 
good  prefer  remaining  at  home,  and  I  will  not  send  you  an 
indifferent  one.  However,  let  us  trust  the  Lord,  and  in  His 
own  good  time  He  will  provide  one." 

The  following  note,  addressed  to  Mrs.  Winslow,  from  the 
late  excellent  and  venerable  Rev.  George  Burder,  author  of 
the  "  Village  Sermons,"  just  alluded  to,  manifests  the  interest 
he  felt  in  this  missionary  effort. 

"My  Dear  Friend,—  "London,  May,  18U. 

"  I  have  not  been  unmindful  of  Bermuda.  I  men- 
tioned it  at  a  meeting  where  many  ministers  were  present,  and 
begged  to  be  informed  if  they  could  hear  of  any.  There  is 
no  person  so  hkely  to  speak  to  as  Mr.  Thomas  Wilson,  of 
Islington.  But,  indeed,  all  the  academies  are  jealous  of  trans- 
ferring their  students  from  their  original  destination,  being  sup- 
ported by  the  public.  I  will  still  make  inquiry,  and  hope,  sooner 
or  later,  we  shall  succeed.  I  will  call  upon  you  if  I  can,  but 
my  hands  are  more  than  full — I  cannot  do  half  my  business. 
"  I  am,  Madam,  yours  in  the  Lord,  George  Border." 


42  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

From  among  a  large  number  of  candidates  who  had  pre 
sented  themselves,  one  at  length  was  deemed  suitable  for  the 
appointment,  and  was  accepted.  The  Rev.  H.  H.  Cross  and 
his  wife  embarked  on  this  interesting  mission,  and  arrived  safe 
at  Bermuda,  amid  the  cordial  and  afiectionate  greetings  of  the 
little  Christian  band  of  whom  he  was  to  assume  the  pastoral 
oversight.  The  chapel  was  completed,  and  dedicated  to  the 
worship  of  God,  in  connexion  with  a  remarkable  and  thrilling 
incident,  strikingly  illustrative  of  His  gracious  and  all-govern- 
ing Providence.  The  interesting  narrative  to  which  we  refer, 
will  be  found  below,  in  a  letter  from  the  Rev.  Mr.  Cross,  ad- 
dressed to  the  Rev.  John  Arundel,  of  the  London  Missionary 
Society.* 

*   ''St.  George's,  Bermuda.  June  20,  1821. 

"  I  am  liapp}'  to  inform  you,  my  dear  brother,  that  our  chapel  was 
opened  on  the  ]  3th  of  April,  under  peculiar  circumstances  of  gratitude 
and  delight  towards  Him  who  conducts  all  things  after  the  counsel  of  His 
own  will. 

"  Previous  to  its  opening,  my  mind  was  a  great  deal  exercised  respect- 
ing the  service  of  that  important  day.  I  had  no  brother  to  whom  I 
could  say,  '  Come  and  help  me:'  I  stood  alone;  and  my  feelings  often 
overwhelmed  me.  My  fears,  however,  were  very  singularly  dispersed 
by  our  kind  and  ever  gracious  God.  On  Saturday,  previous  to  the  13th, 
a  ship  appeared  in  sight  otf  the  island,  hoisting  signals  of  distress  :  and 
a  report  was  soon  circulated,  '  that  she  was  full  of  passengers  and  seve- 
ral Methodist  parsons,  in  a  state  of  starvation  ;  six  months  from  Liver- 
pool, bound  for  New  York.'  I  immediately  thought  on  Mr.  AA^ard  ;  and 
by  referring  to  the  Magazine,  found  that  the  time  of  his  sailing  from 
Liverpool  to  the  United  States  exactly  corresponded.  I  went  up  the 
signal  hill,  where  all  vessels  are  seen,  and  looked  with  an  anxious  eye 
towards  the  ship,  hoping  and  fearing  that  Mr.  Ward  might  be  on  board. 
On  my  return,  however,  I  found  from  a  friend  who  had  just  heard  from 
New  York,  that  Mr.  W.  had  been  there,  and  was  then  about  to  return 
to  England.  On  Sabbath  afternoon,  the  ship,  with  great  difficulty,  came 
witliin  anchorage  off  tlie  island.  Some  of  my  friends  went  with  pro- 
visions on  board,  and  found  the  passengers  in  great  distress,  yet  filled 
with  consolation,  and  manj'-  of  them  with  'joy  and  peace  in  believing.' 
As  the  passengers  were  no  strangers  to  the  language  of  Canaan,  my 
friends  were  soon  introduced  to  the  Rev.  Duncan  Dunbar,  a  Baptist 
minister,  his  wife  and  four  children;  Rev.  Mr,  Grey,  a  Presbyterian 
minister,  and  his  interesting  wile  (to  us  particularly  so,  because  we  soon 
learnt  that  she  had  been  brought  to  the  saving  knowledge  of  the  truth 
from  the  circumstances  of  the  voyage) ;  and  Mr.  AYest,  a  teacher,  a  very 
pious  young  man,  and  son  to  Rev,  Mr.  West,  of  Dublin.  They  stated, 
in  brief,  the  distressing  circumstance  to  my  friends,  who  could  not  then 
listen  to  their  '  Tale  of  woe'  before  they  came  for  some  fresh  supplies 
(circumstances  prevented  the  missionaries  from  landing  on  the  Sabbath, 
and  my  duties  from  seeing  them  that  evening).     It  appeared  they  had 


CHAPEL   OPENED    IN   ST.    GEORGe's.  43 

The  subject  of  colonial  slavery  has  happily  ceased  to  rouse 
those  feehngs  of  horror  and  indignation,  which  at  one  time 
stirred  the  Enghsh  mind  to  its  centre,  by  the  universal  and 

been  at  sea  nearly  six  months  :  for  four  months  they  had  been  on  the 
allowance  of  five  potatoes  per  day,  and  for  three  weeks  the  Missionaries 
had  scarcely  a  drop  of  water  in  their  mouths :  such  were  the  cries  of 
many  children  on  board,  that  they  were  obliged  to  deny  themselves 
what  they  could  only  obtain  from  the  clouds,  to  satisfy  the  thirst  of  the 
little  ones.  They  were,  however,  in  good  health ;  and  were  constrained 
to  say,  'Though  we  have  had  nothing,  we  have  possessed  all  things.' 

"'J he  Divine  presence  had  evidently  blessed  the  labours  of  these  de- 
voted servants  of  Jesus  to  the  hopeful  conversion  of  several. 

"  P]arly  on  Monda}-  morning  I  went  off  with  several  of  my  friends  to 
the  ship,  and  was  soon  in  the  midst  of  this  interesting  Mission  family.  I 
found  them  perfectly  happy,  yea,  rejoicing  in  the  prospect  of  meeting 
some  Christian  friends  in  a  strange  country. 

"  During  their  stay  with  us,  we  had  our  new  chapel  opened.  Mr. 
Dunbar  preached  in  the  morning,  from  Gen.  xxviii.  17,  and  Mr.  Grey  in 
the  evening,  from  Zecli.  xiv.  IG.  17,  to  a  very  crowded  and  attentive 
congregation.  The  collection  amounted  to  eighty  dollars.  Our  friends 
remained  with  us  nearly  three  weeks,  and  their  circumstances  and 
labours  made  a  deep  impression  on  many.  One  evening  after  Mr.  D. 
had  delivered  an  excellent  and  faithful  sermon  from  Acts,  vii.  34,  the 
Collector  of  the  Customs  went  to  one  of  my  friends,  and  begged  that 

his  name  might  be  put  down  for doubloons,  (£21  6s.  8d  currene}^) 

for  the  general  catastrophe,  which,  he  observed,  has  been  so  gratefully 
remembered  by  the  stranger  this  evening.  In  tlie  morning  we  waited 
on  him  to  return  our  thank.s,  and  to  say,  that  as  the  government  liad 
given  orders  that  the  passengers  should  all  be  taken  care  of,  and  for- 
warded to  New  York  hy  the  first  vessel,  we  begged  to  decline  his  kind 
otier.  (-n  stating,  however,  the  great  object  of  Mr.  D.'s  mission,  and 
showing  him  his  case  which  was  strongly  recommended  by  most  of  the 
ministers  in  Edinburgh,  Glasgow  and  Liverpool,  and  particular!}'  by  a 
written  recommendation  from  Dr.  Chalmers.  <  whom  the  Collector  knows,) 
he  ver}'  generously  presented  Mr.  D.  with  the  sum  for  the  object  of  his 
mission,  adding,  '  When  you  arrive  at  New  Brunswick,  show  your  case 
to  several  gentlemen  (whose  names  he  gave  Mr.  D.)  ;  and  give  my  re- 
spects to  them,  and  tell  them  to  look  at  your  book  ;  and  say,  I  hope  to 
hear  from  you  that  they  have  followed  my  example.  God  bless  you, 
and  give  you  success.'  "\Ye  obtained  also,  from  other  friends,  subscrip- 
tions to  the  amount  of  £40,  besides  clothing  and  necessaries  for  tlie 
voyage.  Every  day  rendered  them  more  endearing  to  the  friends  of 
Jesus  in  this  place.  Fain  could  we  have  said,  '  Abide  with  us,  for  tliere 
is  room;'  and  glad  would  they  have  been  to  .sa}^,  '  We  will  continue 
with  you ;'  but  the  piercing  cry  of  the  red  men  of  the  wood.s,  '  No 
white  man  teach  red  man  '  had  penetrated  their  hearts.  '  For  these,' 
said  they,  '  we  have  left  all :  and  for  these  we  must  leave  you.'  Tiiej'" 
left  us  on  Good  Friday,  and  we  are  daily  expecting  to  hear  of  their 
arrival." 


44-  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

entire  extinction  of  the  monstrous  evil.  In  the  Bermudas,  as 
in  all  the  West-India  Islands,  slavery  of  course  existed.  By 
a  legislative  law  of  the  islands,  however,  the  importation  of 
slaves  was  strictly  prohibited.  To  this  enactment,  as  also  to 
the  benevolent  feelings  for  which  Bermudian  society  was  pro- 
verbial, may  be  attributed  the  mitigated  and  mild  form  Avhich 
slavery  in  this  colony  assumed. 

If  in  any  place  involuntary  servitude  appeared  divested  of 
its  more  repulsive  features,  it  was  here.  But  prune  and  mod- 
erate the  evil  as  you  may — lighten  its  yoke,  and  gild  its 
chain— lessen  its  toil,  and  call  it  by  mild  and  gentle  names, — 
"  Slavery,  thou  art  a  bitter  draught !  "  It  is  a  system  contrary 
to  all  the  tender  instincts  of  our  nature,  is  at  war  with  the 
genius  of  Christianity,  and  is  opposed  by  every  sentiment  and 
feeling  of  true  religion  and  virtue.  Familiar  as  Mrs.  Winslow 
was,  from  childhood,  with  this  species  of  servitude,  she  yet 
never  was  wholly  reconciled  to  the  monstrous  principle  of 
holding  property  in  man.  On  reaching  her  majority,  she 
found  herself  the  owner  of  two  domestic  slaves ;  but  although 
lapsing  to  her  by  inheritance,  it  will  appear  that  she  was  ill  at 
ease  in  her  possession ;  in  this  sentiment  she  was  strengthened 
by  the  best  feelings  and  efforts  of  her  husband.  An  illustra- 
tion of  this  may  here  be  given  : — A  poor  free  negro  man 
hastened  one  day  to  Captain  Winslow,  in  the  greatest  dis- 
tress, and  informed  him  that  his  wife  and  children,  who  were 
slaves,  were  on  the  eve  of  being  sold  to  another  master,  with 
the  prospect  of  their  removal  from  the  island,  and  in  all  proba- 
bility their  separation  from  him  for  ever.  He  came  to  request 
his  sympathy  and  aid  in  rescuing  them  from  so  distressing  a 
fate.  His  appeal  met  with  a  cordial  and  instantaneous  re- 
sponse. Not  a  moment  was  to  be  lost.  Seizing  his  sword, 
and  adjusting  it  as  he  passed  through  the  streets,  accompanied 
by  the  anxious  negro.  Captain  Winslow  hastened  to  the  auction 
mart.  The  sale  had  commenced.  There  stood  the  poor  trem 
bling  woman  and  her  children,  for  whom  a  large  sum  had 
already  been  offered.  Captain  Winslow  instantly  became  a 
competitor.  The  contest  grew  warm.  Observing  his  deter- 
mination to  purchase,  the  price  rose  to  an  enormous  sum.  At 
this  juncture,  the  terror-stricken  father  approached  him,  and 
said,  "  0  Massa,  do  not  bid  any  more ;  I  shall  never  be  able 
to  repay  you,  Massa."  ''  Never  mind,  Ben,"  was  the  answer. 
At  length  victory  decided  in  his  favour,  and  he  bore  away  in 


MANUMITS   HER   SLAVES.  45 

triumph  the  slave-wife,  mother,  and  little  ones,  restoring  them 
FREE  to  the  dehghted  and  grateful  husband  and  parent.  "I 
shall  never  be  able  to  repay  jou,  Massa,"  was  the  exclamation 
of  the  poor  negro.  "No  matter  if  you  cannot,"  was  all  the 
reply  of  one,  Avhose  heart  had  already  fovmd  its  full  reward  in 
the  generous  impulse  it  had  cherished,  and  in  the  pure  happi- 
ness it  had  conferred.  Mrs.  Winslow's  views  on  this  subject 
may  be  gathered  from  the  following  letter  to  her  mother : — 

"  I  wish,  my  dear  mamma,  to  give  my  two  negroes,  Ben 
and  John,  their  freedom.  I  cannot  bear  the  idea  of  having 
slaves.  But  if  you  think  it  most  for  their  good  to  keep  them 
in  my  service,  I  will  have  their  freedom  made  out,  so  that  at 
my  death  they  may  not  be  liable  to  be  sold  or  made  slaves.  I 
sometimes  think,  that  to  give  such  a  poor  creature  as  John  his 
freedom  now,  (in  other  words  to  cast  him  off,)  he  would  soon 
go  to  ruin.  But  still  I  would  desire  so  to  manage  things  as  to 
make  him  free  whenever  he  can  maintain  himself,  and  to  secure 
his  freedom  now  in  case  I  should  be  called  home," 

It  is  almost  needless  to  add  that  her  directions  were  im- 
mediately and  fully  complied  with.  And  yet  it  was  one  of 
her  bitterest  self-accusations,  as  from  the  close  of  her  pilgrimage 
she  looked  upon  its  past,  that  she  had  ever  been  the  involun- 
tary possessor  of  a  slave.  It  is  true,  they  were  inherited  and 
not  j)urchased — were  kindly  treated,  justly  remunerated,  and 
ultimately  freed  ;  yet,  as  the  shadows  of  eternity  deepened 
around  her,  this  solemn  background  of  human  life  brought  out 
in  bolder  relief  the  circumstances  and  events  of  bygone  years, 
and  she  was  known  to  weep  and  humble  herself  before  God, 
for  her  past  participation  in  an  evil  which  now  appeared  in  a 
light  so  sinful,  and  in  a  character  so  abhorrent. 

The  spiritual  mind  will  sympathize  with  the  exercises  de 
tailed  in  the  following  letter. 

To  her  Mother. — "  Oh  that  I  could  commit,  with  my  soul, 
all  my  temporal  concerns  into  the  hands  of  my  covenant  God, 
and  feel  that  He  who  has  the  hearts  of  all  men  at  His  com- 
mand will  give  me  all  things,  and  do  all  things  necessary  for 
me  !  for  Jesus  will  '  do  all  things  well.'  Pray,  my  precious 
mother,  that  He  would  increase  my  faith,  for  I  need  it  every 
hour  and  every  moment  of  the  day.  I  often  go  to  Him  w^ith 
the  intention  of  casting  all  my  cares  upon  Him,  but  as  often 
bring  them  away  again.  Oh,  how  far,  how  very  far  do  I  fall 
short  of  what  a  true  Christian  ought  to  be  !     I  grieve  and 


46  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

lament  my  shortcomings,  and  long  to  evince  myself,  by  prac- 
tice as  well  as  by  profession,  a  lowly  follower  of  Jesus  Christ ; 
and  He,  I  trust,  with  whom  all  things  are  possible,  will  enable 
me  to  overcome  and  be  more  than  conqueror.  All  my  hope 
is  in  Him,  my  eye  is  up  to  Him  ;  and  He  has  promised  that 
he  will  in  nowise  cast  out.     Pray  for  me." 

In  the  extract  which  follows,  we  trace  the  early  workings 
of  that  simple,  yet  strong  faith — a  faith  all  the  stronger  because 
so  childlike — for  which  her  whole  Christian  life  was  so  remark- 
able. It  records,  too,  one  of  those  providential  interpositions 
which  so  frequently  appear  in  her  history.  Her  eldest  son 
had  recently  left  her,  on  a  visit  to  Bermuda,  and  she  thus 
writes  to  her  mother : — 

"  I  long  to  hear  from  my  precious  child,  but  still  I  am  not 
so  uneasy  about  him  as  you  and  others  would  imagine ;  for  I 
know  who  commands  the  winds  and  the  waves,  and  I  know 
also  who  has  said,  If  you  ask  anything  in  my  7iame,  it  shall  be 
granted  you.  So  you  see  the  Lord  calls  me  to  walk  by  faith, 
and  He  gives  me  faith  to  trust  Him,  to  His  own  praise  and 
glory.  I  awoke  last  night  and  discovered  my  room  on  fire — 
three  of  my  children  were  with  me.  I  had  prayed  that  the 
Lord  would  watch  over  me  and  mine,  and  not  forgetting  you 

and  B ,  and  keep  us  from  danger.     He  heard  my  petition. 

I  awoke  just  in  time  to  save  myself  and  family  from  being 
burnt.  It  was  occasioned  by  a  spark  falling  from  the  rushlight 
upon  the  dressing-table,  which  set  fire  to  the  wainscot  and 
the  table,  which  were  burning  when  I  awoke.  I  extinguished 
the  fire,  opened  the  door  to  let  the  smoke  escape — for  both 
rooms  were  filled — without  alarming  the  family,  and  retired  to 
bed  again  to  meditate  on  the  goodness  of  God  to  such  an  un- 
worthy creature.  Has  He  not  said  that  His  angels  encamp 
round  about  His  people ;  and  have  I  not  reason  to  believe 
Him  and  bless  Him  for  all  His  mercies  ?  So  you  see,  my  be- 
loved mother,  that  you  have  no  occasion  to  be  uneasy  about 
me,  for  I  am  in  very  precious  hands.  I  only  grieve  that  I 
make  no  greater  progress  in  the  Divine  life.  But  what  a 
mercy  to  be  in  the  way  to  heaven  ;  and  sure  I  am  that  He 
who  has  put  me  in  that  way  will  keep  me  there  until  the  time 
comes  to  call  me  to  partake  of  those  blessings  He  has  purchased 
for  me  with  the  precious  price  of  His  own  blood." 

But  a  dark  cloud  was  now  gathering  over  her  domestic  hap- 
piness.    The  remarkable  grace  we  have  seen  developing  itself 


ILLNESS    OF    HER    HUSBAND.  47 

in  the  infancy  of  her  Christian  hfe,  was  about  to  pass  through 
the  crucible.  The  precious  faith,  so  richly  bestowed,  was  now 
to  be  tried  as  by  fire.  And,  perhaps,  from  this  period  of  her 
history  may  be  dated  the  commencement  of  those  disciplinary 
dealings  of  her  Heavenly  Father,  which  gave  such  a  decided 
impress  and  complexion  to  her  future  life ;  and  to  the  salutary 
influence  of  which  may  be  attributed  that  completeness  and 
mellowness  of  Christian  character,  for  which  she  afterwards 
became  so  eminent.  The  affliction  to  Avhich  we  now  refer,  was 
the  renewed  and  alarming  illness  of  her  husband,  the  circum- 
stances of  which,  and  the  exercises  of  her  mind  on  the  occa- 
sion, she  thus  details  ; — 

"  My  dearest  Mamma, —  *  London,  Aug.  22,  1813. 

"  I  know  it  will  distress  you  to  hear  that  my  be- 
loved husband  is  again  laid  on  a  bed  of  sickness,  perhaps  the 
bed  of  death.  He  was  getting  better,  and  was  looking  as 
well  as  ever  he  did ;  but  I  thought  the  Lord  would  bring  him 
low  to  save  his  soul.  The  world  and  worldly  people  were 
alluring  him  from  all  his  good  resolutions.  On  Tuesday  even- 
ing I  took  a  short  walk  with  him,  and  then  left  him  in  good 
health,  to  go  to  the  House  of  God.  On  my  return,  I  Avas  told 
that  he  had  retired.  I  had  stopped  to  visit  a  dying  saint,  and 
thus  made  it  late  before  I  returned.  As  soon  as  he  heard  me, 
he  called  me  from  the  head  of  the  stairs,  to  come  to  him.  I 
found  him  pale  and  trembling,  for  just  as  he  was  stepping  into 
bed,  he  coughed  and  raised  blood.  I  sent  for  the  physician, 
and  endeavoured  to  tranquillize  his  mind.  The  doctor  came, 
but  said  it  was  so  little  he  would  not  bleed  him,  and  after  tak- 
ing something  prescribed,  he  composed  himself  to  sleep.  The 
next  morning  he  appeared  as  well  as  usual,  and  came  down 
stairs.  But  about  twelve  o'clock  the  dreadful  hcemorrhage 
returned  rapidly,  I  sent  off  for  another  physician,  a  Christian 
man.  They  took  nearly  a  quart  of  blood  from  his  arm.  The 
ha3morrhage  then  abated  for  about  an  hour,  when  it  returned 
again,  and  continued  off  and  on  until  five  o'clock.  My  dear- 
est mother,  how  you  would  have  felt  to  have  witnessed  the 
agony  of  his  distressed  mind.  He  said  there  was  no  hope  for 
him — that  he  had  neglected  the  day  of  salvation,  and  the  Lord 
would  have  no  mercy  on  his  soul.  He  implored  me  to  pray 
for  him  continually.  I  did  pray.  I  spoke  to  him  of  the  love 
of  Jesus,  and  entreated  him  to  call  upon  Him  who  had  prom- 


48  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

ised  that  those  who  came  to  Him  he  would  in  nowise  cast 
out.  He  hung  upon  every  word  I  said,  and  repeated,  'Oh, 
that  I  had  but  taken  your  advice  !'  He  could  not  speak  much, 
but  I  continued  to  repeat  to  him  every  precious  promise  as  well 
as  I  was  able.  He  now  lies  between  life  and  death.  But 
while  there  is  life  there  is  hope.  The  doctors  have  some  hopes 
to-night  that  he  may  recover.  The  sight  of  the  children  threw 
him  into  great  agitation.     Two  hours  ago  he  exclaimed,  'Jesus, 

0  blessed  Jesus !  manifest  Thyself  to  me  I'  It  was  the  first 
prayer  I  ever  heard  him  utter ;  and  I  doubt  not  but  Jesus  has 
heard  it,  too.  The  physician  spoke  sweetly  to  him,  and  im- 
plored him  to  continue  to  call  upon  the  Lord  until  He  answered 
him.  Mr.  Stewart  has  also  been  with  him,  and  endeavoured 
to  lead  him  to  Jesus.  We  have  just  been  at  prayer  by  his 
bed-side,  and  I  am  now  writing  close  by  him. 

"  This,  my  precious  mother,  has  been,  and  is,  a  trying  time 
to  me ;  but  the  Lord,  ever  faithful  to  His  promise,  is  with  me, 
and  gives  me  strength  according  to  my  day.  Fear  not  for 
me ;  God  is  my  Father ;  He  watches  over  me,  and  will  not 
afflict  me  beyond  what  he  will  give  me  strength  to  bear ;    and 

1  trust,  if  it  is  the  Lord's  will.  He  will  again  restore  him.  I 
have  entreated  him  not  to  think  of  me  or  of  his  children,  but 
only  to  think  of  his  own  soul.  I  read  and  pray,  and  watch 
over  him,  and  am  scarcely  a  moment  from,  his  side.  He  says, 
if  he  is  but  spared,  how  differently  will  he  live.  Oh,  that 
Jesus  may  hear  my  prayer,  and  cause  his  soul  to  rejoice. 

'■'■Friday  nighty  23. — My  precious  Winslow  has  had  a  good 
night,  and  has  continued  so  throughout  the  day.  The  bleed- 
ing has  not  returned,  but  the  physician  says  he  is  not  out  of 
danger.  He  says  nothing,  for  he  is  not  allowed  to  speak ;  but 
I  trust  he  thinks  the  more.  We  have  just  been  at  prayer  by 
his  side.  Good  Mr.  Baker  engaged  in  prayer,  and  all  the  fam- 
ily, as  usual,  attended.  May  the  Lord  in  mercy  hear  our 
prayers !  My  spirits,  which  for  two  days  and  nights  have 
been  wonderfully  supported,  to-night  a  little  flagged,  and  a 
trifling  thing  threw  me  into  tears.  I  have  everything  to  be 
thankful  for ;  but  my  mind  has  been  on  the  full  stretch,  and 
weeping  nov.^  is  a  relief.  But  I  am,  thank  God,  well,  and 
have  no  fear  but  for  the  salvation  of  my  precious  husband's 
immortal  soul.  Oh,  may  he  be  led,  in  this  affliction,  to  seek 
Jesus  with  all  his  heart ! 

"  24. — Thank  God,  he  is  better  to-day.     Oh,  may  this  warn 


ILLNESS   OF   HER   HUSBAND.  49 

him  to  flee  from  the  wrath  to  come  !  but  I  am  afraid  it  will  not 
suflQce.  His  distress  is  not  occasioned,  I  fear,  by  sin  committed 
against  a  holy,  good,  and  righteous  God,  but  from  a  fear  of 
death.  However,  the  Lord  knows  best  how  to  work  upon  the 
sinner's  heart,  and  I  trust  He  will  save  his  soul. 

"  Saturday  afternoon. — The  physician  has  seen  Winslow, 
and  says  he  thinks  he  will  do  well.  He  implored  him  to  pray 
to  the  Physician  of  souls,  who  knew  his  heart,  and  could  read 

there  his  desires.     I  am  rejoiced  you  have  Miss  M with 

you  :  I  doubt  not,  from  what  Mr.  S.  tells  me,  she  is  a  child  of 
God,  and  knows  what  it  is  to  be  born  again.  May  she  prove 
a  real  blessing  to  you.  Tell  her  I  love  her,  because  she  be- 
longs to  the  fold  of  Jesus,  and  for  her  attachment  to  you. 
May  the  Lord,  whom  we  serve,  strengthen  your  heart  to 
persevere  in  the  blessed  cause,  and  to  show  to  all  about  you 
what  great  things  he  has  wrought  in  your  soul !  Broad  is 
the  road  to  destruction,  and  many  go  therein ;  narrow  is  the 
road  that  leads  to  glory,  and  there  are  few,  comparatively,  who 
find  it — happy  few !  And,  oh,  what  a  mercy  that  he  has 
guided  our  feet  there !  Our  souls  and  bodies  ought  to  be  de- 
voted to  Him,  to  glorify  Him  for  His  distinguishing  grace ; 
for  what  are  we  more  than  others,  that  He  should  fix  His 
everlasting  love  upon  us  while  we  were  dead  in  trespasses  and 
in  sins  ?  But  He  will  have  mercy  upon  whom  He  will  have 
mercy.  Blessed,  for  ever  blessed,  be  His  adored  name.  Oh, 
for  grace  to  serve  Him  better,  and  to  love  Him  more  !  We 
love  Him^  because  He  first  loved  its.  Our  love  is  the  effect,  and 
not  the  cause,  of  His  love  to  us. 

"  Sept.  3. — I  know  it  will  please  you  to  have  a  line,  especially 
as  I  can  tell  you  my  dearest  Winslow  is  mending  as  fast  as  I 
could  wish.  May  grace  be  as  thriving  in  his  soul  as  health  is 
in  his  body  !  I  am  strong,  and  in  good  spirits ;  for  my  Friend 
above  reigneth,  and  He  has  enabled  me  to  cast  every  weight 
of  care  upon  Him.     I  have  everything  to  praise  Him  for ;  for 

goodness  and  loving-kindness  follow  me  all  my  days.  Mrs. 

said  to  me  the  other  day,  "  What  a  blessing  it  is,  situated  as 
you  are,  that  you  are  religious  ! '  She  might  have  said,  'What 
a  blessing  it  is  that  God  is  your  Friend ! '  Oh,  the  sweets  of 
religion  1  To  know  the  Lord  Jesus  is  our  Friend,  surpasses 
every  earthly  good,  and  is  better  than  the  possession  of  a  thou- 
sand worlds.  To  have  Him  to  go  to, — to  lay  before  Him  all 
our  wants,  to  express  our  fears,  to  plead  his  promises,  and  to 
3 


50  MEMOIR    OF    MKS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

expect  that  because  He  has  promised  He  will  fulfil, — is  worth 
more  than  all  the  world  can  give.  His  ear  is  ever  open  to  the 
prayer  of  his  people,  and, 

*  Though  hell  and  death  obstruct  the  way, 
The  weakest  saint  shall  win  the  day.' 

"My  precious  husband  begins  to  understand  and  to  love  the 
truth.  He  who  has  begun  a  good  work,  will  complete  it  in 
him.  He  loves  and  admires  Mr.  Sheppard,  our  worthy  clergy- 
man, who  regularly  visits  us  once  a  fortnight ;  and  although 
Winslow  does  not  say  much,  he  listens  with  the  profoundest 
attention  to  everything  of  a  serious  nature  when  we  have  any 
religious  friends  with  us." 

Thus,  the  dark  cloud,  enshrouding  her  domestic  happiness, 
and  which  for  a  while  wore  an  aspect  so  threatening,  was  in  a 
measure  removed.  The  pious  physician,  to  whom  allusion  is 
made  in  the  preceding  extracts,  merits  a  passing  notice.  The 
gentleman  referred  to,  was  the  late  Dr.  James  Hamilton,  a 
name  as  sacred  to  religion  as  it  w^as  dear  to  science.  The  pe- 
culiar and  salutary  influence  of  the  Christian  physician  was, 
perhaps,  never  more  strikingly  illustrated  than  in  the  case  of 
Dr.  Hamilton.  Everywhere,  and  on  all  occasions,  he  was  the 
man  of  God ;  but  nowhere  did  his  Christianity  shine  with  so 
rich  a  lustre  as  by  the  side  of  the  sick  bed.  On  one  occasion, 
when  allusion  was  made  to  the  happy  results  of  a  prescription, 
with  lowliness  he  remarked,  that  he  "never  prescribed  a  rem- 
edy imaccompanied  with  a  prayer  for  the  Divine  blessing  upon 
its  use."  It  was  frequently  his  habit,  extensive  as  was  his 
practice,  to  spend  five  minutes  in  prayer,  before  retiring  from 
the  sick  room,  thus  leaving  upon  the  mind  of  his  patient  a 
most  soothing,  healthful  influence.*  What  an  incalculable 
blessing  may  such  an  individual  be  !     The  Christian  physician 

*  A  marble  tablet,  erected  to  his  memory  in  the  City  Road  Chapel, 
thus  truthfully  records  his  many  Christian  virtues :  "His  religion  was 
exhibited  in  his  medical  profession,  in  his  family,  in  his  general  inter- 
course with  societ}',  in  the  sweetness  and  amiability  of  his  temper,  in 
the  habitual  composure  and  happiness  of  his  life,  and  pre-eminentl}'  in 
his  Catholic  spirit,  which  led  him  to  love  all  who  feared  God,  without 
any  distinction  of  sect  or  party.  He  ascribed  his  eminent  success  in  his 
professional  efforts  to  the  power  of  God  in  answer  to  prayer:  and  he 
hved  and  died  with  the  abiding  conviction  of  his  own  unworthiness  as  a 
sinner,  and  of  the  sufficiency  of  a  Saviour's  righteousness,  at  the  good 
old  age  of  eighty-six." 


INFLUENCE    OP    CHRISTIAN   PHYSICIANS.  51 

is  begirt  with  opportunities  of  usefulness,  to  which  the  gospel 
minister  can  scarcely  aspire.  The  clergyman  is,  in  most  in- 
stances, the  last  attendant  of  a  sick  room  thought  of,  the  last 
summoned,  and  often  when  too  late  to  be  of  any  essential 
avail — the  patient,  perhaps,  worn  by  fever,  racked  with  agony, 
or  stupified  by  anodynes.  But  the  Christian  physician  is  the 
constant  attendant ;  he  possesses  the  ear,  the  confidence,  and 
the  grateful  regard  of  the  sick  person.  "Without  awaking  a 
needless  suspicion  of  danger,  and  thereby  producing  undue  ex- 
citement, he  can  direct  the  languid  eye  to  the  good  and  great 
Ph3'sician  of  tlie  soul,  and  tell  of  His  blood,  the  only  remedy 
for  the  mind's  malady.  Thus,  like  his  divine  Master,  whom 
of  all  others  he  most  closely  resembles,  he  may  travel  from 
ward  to  ward  in  this  vast  hospital,  "  healing  all  manner  of 
diseases,  and  preaching  the  gospel  of  the  kingdom."  Who,  as 
he  accompanies  Dr.  Hamilton  to  the  bedside  of  the  sinking 
and  alarmed  patient,  and  marks  his  affectionate  fidelity  and 
Christian  concern  for  the  higher  interests  of  the  soul,  feels  not 
a  desire  that  a  vocation  so  ennobled  as  a  science,  and  so  purely 
benevolent  as  a  profession,  might  be  universally  sanctified  and 
consecrated  by  religion  ? 

Mrs.  Winslow's  ecclesiastical  views  at  this  period  may  be 
gathered  from  the  following  letter  to  her  mother  : — 

"  We  are  going  on  as  usual,  so  that  there  is  nothing  impor- 
tant to  tell  you.  My  rehgious  pursuits  are  my  greatest  delight; 
and  I  can  truly  say,  religion's  ways  are  to  me  ways  of  pleas- 
antness, and  all  its  paths  are  peace.    I  had  a  long  conversation 

with  Mr. the  other  day  on  this  subject ;  but  as  I  am  not 

a  member  of  his  communion,  and  dishke  much  I  see  in  it,  and 
as  he  is  very  bigoted  to  his  own  views,  we,  of  course,  cannot 
in  many  things  agree.  But,  lest  you  should  wonder  wherein 
we  differ,  it  will  be  necessary  to  say  it  is  only  on  church  gov- 
ernment and  ordinances  ;  and  as  he  sees  not  with  the  Church 
of  England,  while  I  remain  in  it,  he  thinks  I  act  wrong.  But  as 
I  see  so  many  errors  in  his,  I  will  remain  where  I  am  until  I 
find  a  purer  and  more  perfect  branch  of  Christ's  church.  I  hear 
the  gospel  in  its  greatest  purity  and  excellence,  and  next  to 
communion  with  God,  it  is  my  greatest  comfort  and  joy  to 
wait  upon  the  preaching  of  the  word.  Hardly  any  weather 
keeps  me  at  home.'' 

Warmly  attached,  however,  as  she  was  to  the  Established 
Church,  to  which  she  then  belonged,  her  soul,  panting  for  the 


52  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

living  water,  could  slake  its  thirst  at  any  channel  through 
which  it  flowed.  She  delighted,  therefore,  to  attend  the 
weekly  ministration  of  ministers  of  Christ,  other  than  those  of 
her  own  church  ;  and  regularly  once  a-week  she  walked  a  mile 
to  Islington  Chapel,  where  her  soul  was  often  refreshed  by  its 
services.  The  eminent  provincial  ministers,  who  at  this  period 
supplied  in  rotation  the  pulpits  of  Tottenham  <Jourt  Road 
Chapel,  and  the  Tabernacle,  Moorfields,  frequently  allured  her 
to  these  "  wells  of  salvation,"  from  which,  in  seasons  of  trial 
and  spiritual  dejection,  she  often  returned  invigorated  and 
comforted.  She  manifested,  at  this  stage  of  her  Christian 
course,  a  deep  interest  in  the  spread  of  the  gospel  through  all 
lands;  and  thus  refers,  in  a  letter  to  her  mother,  to  the  re- 
ligious anniversaries  then  transpiring  : — 

"I  am  just  going  into  the  City,  to  attend  the  Missionary 
Meeting,  and  will  write  to  you  on  my  return.  Evening. — I 
did  not  return  from  the  meeting  until  five  o'clock,  and  then 
only  had  time  to  take  a  cup  of  coffee,  and  hurry  off  to  the 
evening  service.  I  have  indeed  been  animated  to-day,  at  see- 
ing so  many  of  God's  dear  people  exerting  their  powers  to  the 

utmost  for  the  spread  of  the  everlasting  gospel.     T and  I 

set  out,  as  soon  as  I  arranged  my  family  matters  for  the  day, 
and  we  were  fortunately  at  the  London  Tavern  in  time  to 
obtain  sittings  ;  for  many  ladies  stood  the  whole  service.  The 
speaking  lasted  from  two  o'clock  until  five.  All  was  anima- 
tion and  zeal.  My  favourite,  Mr.  Wilberforce,  was  most  ex- 
cellent. The  eloquence  of  the  orator,  the  elegance  of  the 
gentleman,  and  the  piety  of  the  Christian,  were  all  blended  in 
him,  and  in  all  he  said.  The  crowd  was  very  great,  and  the 
applause  at  the  different  speeches  so  loud  and  so  long  that  my 
head  ached  while  my  heart  rejoiced.  Lord  Gambler  was  in 
the  chair,  and  what  little  he  said  showed  that  his  heart  and 
soul  were  devoted  to  Jesus.  I  never  saw  such  an  assemblage 
of  gospel  ministers  in  one  place  before,  and  such  a  number  of 
ladies,  whose  countenances  beamed  with  delight,  and  whose 
tears  bespoke  their  love  to  the  cause  of  Christ.  This  is  a 
busy  w^eek  for  the  church  militant.  Missionary  meetings  and 
sermons  in  all  directions,  and  by  the  Church  of  England,  Inde- 
pendents, and  Baptists  ;  for  here  they  all  sweetly  unite  in  send- 
ing the  blessed  gospel  to  the  poor  heathen.  Besides  this,  there 
is  a  society  formed  for  instructing  the  Jews,  and  bringing  God's 
ancient  people  (or  rather  using  the  moans,  with  His  blessing, 


HER   YOUNG   FAMILY.  §3 

for  bringing  them)  to  bow  their  knee  to  our  Immanuel.  This 
meeting  also  takes  place  this  week,  and  I  am  invited,  as  a 
member  of  the  society,  to  attend,  at  which  I  shall,  please 
God,  have  the  happiness  of  seeing  many  Jews  baptized  in  the 
name  of  Jesus,  How  I  shall  rejoice,  when  it  pleases  God  to 
bring  you  to  us,  to  go  with  you  to  such  places;  for  I  know  it 
will  gladden  your  heart.  May  the  Captain  of  our  salvation 
keep  us  steady  and  persevering !  And  when  I  see  the  many 
temptations  all  around  me,  and  feel  my  own  weakness,  I  in- 
deed work  out  my  own  salvation  with  fear  and  trembling. 
"What  a  glorious  animating  prospect  we  have  before  us !  A 
crown  of  glory  —  an  inheritance  incorruptible.,  undefiled^  and 
thatfadeth  not  away;  and  this  is  reserved  in  heaven  for  God's 
people,  and  they  are  kept  for  it  by  the  mighty  power  of  God. 
Fear  7iot,  little  flock,  says  Jesus  ;  it  is  your  Father's  good  pleas- 
ure to  give  yon  the  kingdom.     Good-night." 

The  following  familiar  letter  is  introduced  as  being  the  only 
one  in  the  volume  which  affords  anything  like  a  particular  ref- 
erence to  her  young  family  ;  thus  supplying  a  link  in  the  nar- 
rative, which,  perhaps,  would  otherwise  be  missed : — 

"  My  dearest  Mother, —  Twickenham  Common. 

"  Yours  was  forwarded  to  me  at  this  |)lace,  where 

I  am  for  a  week,  with  my  dear  little  suffering  0 ,  in  the 

hope,  with  God's  blessing,  the  change  of  air  may  be  of  service. 
The  Lord  only  knows  whether  I  shall  ever  rear  him.  The 
physician  in  town  pronounces  him  in  a  decline,  but  that  the 
change  of  air  may  be  of  service.  He  is  very  dear  and  pre- 
cious to  me  ;  but  I  desire  to  resign  him  into  His  hand,  who  is 
able  to  rescue  him  even  from  the  grave  ;  and  if  it  be  His 
blessed  will  to  take  him,  I  have  a  humble  hope  that  He  will 
give  me  grace  to  say.  Thy  will  he  done!  But  oh,  my  dear 
mother,  you  know  my  heart  is  wrapped  up  in  my  children  ; 
and  this  sweet  little  sufferer  is  particularly  dear  to  me,  because 
he  has  been  almost  all  his  life  afflicted  ;  and  I  beheve,  if  every 
hair  of  his  head  were  numbered,  I  have  had  a  tear,  a  sigh,  a 
groan  for  each  one.  I  am  often  afraid  the  Lord  is  chastening 
me  for  my  too  anxious  concern  about  my  children.  But  I 
know  that  all  He  does  will  eventually  be  for  my  good  and  His 
glory. 

"  I  have  a  little  cottage  on  Twickenham  Common  for  a 
month,  where  the  air  is  fine,  and  all  the  other  children  seem 


54  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

much  benefited  by  it.  I  have  with  me  the  five  younger  chil- 
dren.    I and  E ,  with  a  young  friend  of  theirs,  come 

down  to  me  on  Saturday,  as  they  then  break  up  for  the  Mid- 
summer. Dear  httle  F is  one  of  the  loveUest  boys,  per- 
haps, you  ever  saw.     R grows  a  fine  fellow,  and  often 

talks  of  you  and  his  little  wife.     He  is  a  good-looking  boy, 

nearly  as  tall  as  G ,  who  is  as  wild  as  possible,  and  as  lazy 

as  T .     I  received  a  letter  from  him  yesterday,  at  Cadiz, 

but  there  is  no  prospect  at  present  of  his  coming  home.*.  .  .  . 
God  is  my  Shepherd,  and  all  my  concerns  are  in  His  hands. 
Blessed,  forever  blessed,  be  His  dear  and  holy  name,  who  has 
looked  with  everlasting  mercy  on  such  a  poor,  vile  sinner  as 
me,  and  encouraged  me  with  such  sweet  manifestations  of  His 
love,  to  trust  my  soul  and  all  my  interests  in  His  hands  ;  and 

if  God  is  for  me,  who  can  prevail  against  me  ?     If  J\Irs. 

comes  home,  I  will  endeavour  to  see  her  for  your  sake ;  but  I 
rather  decline  much  intercourse  with  worldly  people ;  for  if 
one  can  do  them  no  good,  they  are  sure  to  do  you  some  harm. 
May  the  Lord  bless  you  in  your  soul,  and  enable  you  to  follow 
after  the  one  thing  needful,  and  induce  you  to  make  that  the 
chief  concern  of  your  life  !  Religion  is  a  personal  thing ;  we 
must  not  leave  our  salvation  to  an  uncertainty,  and  merely  con- 
sider Jesus  as  the  Saviour  of  sinners ;  but  we  are  to  know 
that  He  is  our  Saviour ;  and  the  Scriptures  encourage  us  to 
press  forward  until  we  do  ascertain  this  ;  and  God  has  never 
promised  what  he  does  not  mean  to  perform.  The  ever-blessed 
Jesus  has  encouraged  us  to  ask  and  implore,  and  we  must  take 
no  denial,  but,  like  the  importunate  widow,  never  rest  until 
He  blesses  us,  and  assures  us  by  the  witness  of  the  Spirit,  that 
He  is  ours,  and  that  we  are  His  blood-bought  children.  May 
He  give  His  blessing  to  these  imperfect  words,  is  the  earnest 
prayer,  my  dearest  mamma,  of  your  affectionate  daughter." 

*  Her  eldest  son,  then  a  midsbipmau  in  the  Royal  Navy. 


CHAPTEK    IV. 

Probably,  in  no  part  of  Grod's  dealings  with  His  people  is 
the  perfection  of  His  work  more  apparent — His  wisdom,  love, 
and  power  more  clearly  seen — than  in  fitting  them  for  the 
exact  niche  in  life  He  had  pre-ordained  them  to  fill.  And  it  is 
no  shght  mercy  for  the  Christian  to  have  a  clear,  unmistak- 
able perception  of  the  Lord's  mind  concerning  this  matter; 
and  then,  be  his  mission  lowly  or  exalted,  his  post  of  duty  one 
of  honour  or  humiliation,  to  have  grace  vouchsafed  cheerfully 
to  acquiesce,  and  promptly  to  obey.  Thus  had  God  remark- 
ably fitted  the  subject  of  our  Memoir  for  the  position  in  life  in 
which  she  was  now,  and  for  so  many  years,  in  sad  and  lonely 
widowhood,  to  glorify  Him.  The  path  she  was  henceforth  to 
tread,  demanded  a  character  of  no  ordinary  energy,  fortitude, 
and  strength ;  but  more  than  this — and  apart  from  which  the 
miglitiest  powers  of  nature  must  have  succumbed — a  large 
degree  of  the  Saviour's  grace,  so  freely  promised,  and  so 
richly  bestowed  upon  all  who  humbly  seek  it.  But,  great  as 
was  the  occasion  which  now  summoned  into  action  the  best 
powers  of  her  mind,  by  the  help  of  Him  who  perfects  His 
strength  in  human  weakness,  she  proved  herself  equal  to  the 
emergency.     And  we  will  glorify  God  in  her. 

The  retirement  of  Captain  Winslow  from  the  army  has 
already  been  mentioned.  The  circumstances  which  led  to  this 
step  it  may  be  interesting  to  the  reader  more  minutely  to 
relate.  It  was  at  a  critical  period  of  her  hfe — when  danger- 
ously ill  in  Ireland — that  the  47th  Regiment  was  under  orders 
to  embark  for  India.  The  troops  had  left  Cork  for  Ports- 
mouth, and  were  prepared  to  sail  at  a  moment's  notice ;  the 
wind  was  unfavourable,  and  the  transports  were  detained.  It 
was  a  moment  of  intense  anxiety  to  Captain  Winslow.  Un- 
willing to  leave  his  wife  under  such  circumstances,  and  with 
no  prospect  of  hearing  from  her  for  many  months  to  come,  he 
resolved,  without  a  moment's  hesitation,  to  retire.     Permission 

(55) 


56  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

to  sell  was  asked  from  the  Duke  of  York — the  Commander-in- 
Chief  Mrs.  Winslow's  illness  increased — the  Duke  hesitated 
— a  slight  variation  of  the  wind  would  decide  the  question. 
The  suspense  was  agonizing.  At  length  the  Colonel  of  the 
regiment  handed  him  a  letter  from  head-quarters,  containing 
the  Duke's  consent.  In  less  than  an  hour  afterwards  the  wind 
veered,  and  the  transports  sailed  ;  and  Captain  Winslow  re- 
linquished a  commission  in  the  army  he  had  held  from  early  life, 
with  equal  honour  to  himself  and  fidelity  to  his  sovereign. 
Tlius,  often  do  the  most  signal  events  of  our  history — those 
upon  which  all  the  future  turns  as  on  a  pivot — transpire  as  in 
a  moment,  and  by  a  power  manifestly  beyond  ourselves.  This 
were  a  phenomenon  utterly  inexplicable,  but  for  the  doctrine 
of  a  particular  Providence,  guiding  and  shaping  the  minutest 
as  the  most  important  events  of  our  life.  Nothing  could  have 
been  further  from  his  thoughts  than  the  position  in  which  Cap- 
tain Winslow  now  suddenly  found  himself  A  few  hours 
before,  he  could  not  have  conceived  that  he  should  be  walking 
on  the  ramparts  of  Portsmouth,  gazing  upon  the  transports  as 
they  spread  their  canvas  to  the  fair  breeze,  and  stretched  away 
to  the  ocean.  This  sudden  and  decisive  step  was,  upon  first 
reflection,  a  cause  of  much  disappointment  and  regret  to  Mrs. 
Winslow,  who  had  looked  forward  to  the  army — for  which, 
from  habit,  she  had  now  imbibed  a  strong  liking — as  the 
future  profession  of  her  sons.  She  lived,  however,  to  acknowl- 
edge God's  hand  in  this  apparently  adverse  movement,  and 
gratefully  to  acquiesce  in  a  circumstance  which  threatened  to 
bhght  so  much  hope,  but  which,  in  reality,  resulted  in  so  much 
good.  And  although  her  interest  in  military  affairs  never 
entirely  ceased,  yet  as  her  Christianity  deepened,  she  desired, 
and  sought  for  her  children  other  and  more  peaceful,  yet  not 
less  honorable  and  useful  vocations. 

Some  years  after  Captain  Winslow's  retirement  from  the 
army,  his  ample  fortune  became  seriously  impaired  through  ill- 
advised  and  disastrous  investments.  It  was  this  circumstance 
— an  important  link  in  the  chain  of  events,  evolving  God's 
purposes  of  love — that  suggested  a  removal  to  the  United 
States  of  America,  as  offering  wider  scope  for  a  family  com- 
posed almost  entirely  of  boys,  and  a  place  of  residence  more 
favourable  to  resources  now  sadly  crippled.  Accordingly,  at 
the  close  of  the  Peninsular  war,  the  subject  of  this  Memoir, 
accompanied  by  a  family  of  ten  children  and  several  of  her 


HER  REMOVAL  TO  AMERICA.  57 

attaclied  household,  embarked  for  New  York.  Her  husband 
— whom  she  Avas  desirous  of  preceding,  with  a  view  of  wel- 
coming him,  on  his  arrival,  to  a  new  and  pleasant  home — was 
to  follow  her  in  a^  few  months.  It  was  a  novel  and  a  serious 
undcjL'taking  for  a  female,  lone  and  unaided, — her  eldest  son 
yet  a  minor,  and  her  youngest  child  an  infant  at  the  breast. 
Writers  of  taste  have  been  wont  to  expatiate  with  great  elo- 
quence and  feeling  upon  the  sublimity  presented  in  the  spec- 
tacle of  a  woman  educated  amidst  the  elegancies  and  indulg- 
ences of  prosperous  life,  meeting  the  sudden  reverses  of  for- 
tune with  fortitude,  and  proving  the  comforter  and  the  support 
of  her  husband  when  bowed  beneath  the  stern  blast  of  adver- 
sity. "As  the  vine,  which  has  long  twined  its  graceful  foliage 
about  the  oak,  and  been  lifted  by  it  into  sunshine,  will,  when 
the  hardy  plant  is  rifted  by  the  thunderbolt,  cling  round  it 
with  its  caressing  tendrils,  and  bind  up  its  shattered  boughs ; 
so  it  is  beautifully  ordained  by  Providence,  that  woman,  who 
is  the  mere  dependent  and  ornament  of  man  in  their  happier 
hours,  shall  be  his  stay  and  solace  when  smitten  with  sudden 
calamity;  winding  herself  into  the  rugged  recesses  of  his 
nature,  tenderly  supporting  the  drooping  head,  and  binding  up 
the  broken  heart."*  At  no  period  of  Mrs.  Winslow's  life  did 
her  mental  force  and  decision  of  character  appear  more  tran- 
scendent than  now.  The  reverse  of  fortune,  which  well-nigh 
crushed  the  spirits  of  her  husband,  but  served  to  nerve  and 
animate  her  own.  The  calamity  which  despondingly  de- 
pressed him,  gave  intrepidity  and  elevation  to  her.  She 
struck  upon  an  expedient  and  resolved  upon  its  execution. 
Few  individuals,  yet  fewer  of  her  gentle  sex,  could  have 
braced  themselves  to  responsibilities  so  great,  or  would  have 
submitted  to  sacrifices  so  costly.  To  expatriate  herself  from  a 
land  of  such  endeared  associations — voluntarily  to  relinc[uish  a 
home  of  such  luxurious  comforts,  and  a  circle  of  friendships  so 
choice — to  adjust  herself  with  such  grace  to  altered  circum- 
stances— to  confront  with  firmness  new  difficulties,  and  enter 
cheerfully  upon  unknown  trials,  called  into  play  no  ordinary 
powers,  and  fully  realized  the  exquisite  picture  of  woman  in 
adversity,  as  sketched  with  so  much  elegance  and  truth  by  the 
American  writer  we  have  quoted,  and  for  which,  so  accurate 
iu  the  resemblance,  she  might  have  sat  as  the  original. 

♦  Washington  Irving. 
3* 


58  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

It  was  in  the  month  of  June,  1815,  accompanied  by  her 
responsible  charge,  she  embarked  from  Gravesend  for  New 
York.  The  Divine  precept,  "  Seek  ye  first  the  kingdom  of 
God  and  His  rigliteousness,"  was  still  her  guiding  star.  Hav- 
ing engaged  for  her  large  party  of  ten  children  and  her  ser- 
vants, the  entire  cabin  of  the  vessel,  she  was  not  long  in  con- 
secrating it  to  the  service  of  God.  As  soon  as  possible,  the 
family  altar  was  again  reared,  and  throughout  the  voyage 
she  was  enabled  to  maintain  morning  and  evening  worship  ; 
and  during  the  day  to  carry  out  her  httle  plans  of  domestic 
instruction  and  usefulness,  Avith  the  same  regularity  and  zeal 
as  at  home.  In  this  God  remarkably  aided  her.  For  when 
the  voice  of  praise  and  prayer  first  ascended  to  the  deck,  the 
captain,  on  ascertaining  the  cause,  immediately  gave  the  strictest 
orders  that  all  interruption  should  cease  during  the  service ; 
and  he  was  frequently  observed  quietly  to  descend  the  com- 
panion-way, take  off  his  hat,  and  kneel  outside  the  cabin 
during  the  prayer.  Pie  was  subsequently  invited,  with  a  few 
others,  who  requested  the  favour,  regularly  to  unite  in  the 
family  devotions.  Thus  did  God  honour  one  who,  in  her  con- 
scious weakness  but  godly  sincerity,  everywhere  sought  to 
honour  Him.  It  was  a  favourite  maxim  of  hers,  which  many 
readers  of  this  A^olume  will  recognise,  "Walk  in  the  precept^ 
and  God  will  fulfil  the  irromiser  In  the  intermediate  part  of 
the  ship  she  discovered  a  young  lady,  far  advanced  in  a  de- 
cline, and  who,  with  her  little  son,  was  on  her  way  to  rejoin 
her  husband.  She  immediately  had  her  removed  to  her  own 
cabin,  that  she  might  administer  to  her  temporal  comfort,  and 
that  the  invalid  migh  tenjoy  the  daily  rehgious  privileges  of 
the  family.  Thus,  one  who  was  destined  to  expire  with  the 
first  breath  she  inhaled  of  the  land  air— for  she  died  as  the 
ship  dropped  her  anchor  in  the  placid  waters  of  the  Hudson, 
and  before  she  met  her  husband — was  permitted,  ere  she  en- 
tered the  eternal  world,  to  hear  frequently  explained,  and 
affectionately  enforced,  the  grand  theme  of  the  gospel — that 
Christ  Jesus  came  into  the  world  to  save  the  chief  of  sinners. 

Mrs.  Winslow  found,  in  the  land  of  her  adoption,  a  home 
and  a  sanctuary.  Furnished  with  introductions  to  some  of 
the  leading  families  of  New  York,  amongst  whom  were  Colonel 
Bayard,  formerly  of  the  British  Consulate,  and  Divie  Bethune, 
the  son-in-law  and  biographer  of  Mrs.  Isabella  Graham,  she 
was  solaced  with  the  reflection  that,  though  an  exile,  and  in  ad- 


HER    OPINION    OF   THE   UNITED   STATES.  59 

• 

versitj,  she  was  not  Avithout  that  sympathy  and  kindness  which 
to  none  is  more  welcome  and  soothing  than  to  the  lone  heart  of 
the  stranger.  And,  as  the  circle  of  her  friendships  widened,  en- 
riched by  some  of  the  most  eminent  for  Christian  influence 
and  worth,  she  soon  discovered  the  continent  that  had  attracted 
her  to  its  friendly  coasts  to  be  in  hospitality  and  courtesy,  as 
in  language  and  religion,  the  affectionate  daughter  of  the  land 
she  had  left.  And  when,  in  after  years,  she  quitted  its  shores, 
to  spend  the  evening  of  her  life,  and  die,  amid  earlier  scenes 
and  older  friendships,  the  recollection  of  the  land  that  had 
afforded  her  a  pleasant  asylum  in  adversity,  she  still  warmly 
and  gratefully  cherished.  America  was  hallowed  ground  to 
her.  The  history  of  her  sojourn  upon  its  soil  had  engraven 
its  name  more  deeply  and  ineffaceably  on  her  heart  than 
"  France"  was  said  to  have  been  on  the  heart  of  Mary  Queen 
of  Scots.  Her  interest  in  its  prosperity  never  decreased.  Its 
religious  literature,  the  histories  of  its  churches,  and,  especially, 
the  biographies  of  its  saints,  beguiled,  happily,  many  an  hour 
of  her  closing  pilgrimage.  She  contemplated  it  with  a  kind 
of  prophetic  interest.  Its  vast  territory,  its  exhaustless  capa- 
bilities, and  its  glorious  revivals,  impressed  her  with  the  con- 
viction that  America  was  destined  to  be  the  future  home  of 
the  church,  the  Mount  Ararat,  where  the  Ark  would  repose 
from  the  storms  and  convulsions  of  the  Old  World,  the  hemi- 
sphere upon  which  would  dawn  the  first  light  of  the  millennial 
glory.  There  was  but  one  dark  spot  in  its  history,  over  which 
she  wept ;  and  many  a  fervent  petition  she  sent  up  to  heaven 
for  its  removal.  That  spot  effaced,  America  would  stand  forth 
peerless  amongst  the  nations  of  the  earth.  Give  her  entire 
population  equal  rights  and  liberty — civil  and  religious — and 
she  will  soar  in  national  greatness  and  in  moral  influence,  like 
her  own  symbolic  eagle,  to  the  sun. 

And  yet  it  was  in  this  land  that  she  was  made  to  drink  most 
deeply  of  the  waters  of  adversity.  She  had  scarcely  become 
settled  in  her  new  and  pleasant  home  ere  death  invaded  it. 
The  infant  daughter  she  had  borne  across  the  Atlantic  sickened 
and  died.  This  was  the  first  draught  from  sorrow's  cup.  That 
cup  was  now  to  be  brimmed.  While  the  corpse  of  her  babe 
lay  yet  unentombed,  the  woeful  intelligence  reached  her  that 
she  was  a  widow!  "Deep  calleth  unto  deep  at  the  noise  of 
thy  waterspouts ;  all  thy  waves  and  thy  billows  are  gone  over 
me."     Such  was  now  her  mournful  experience.     He  letters 


60  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW. 

written  at  this  sad  period  of  her  history,  a  few  of  which  only 
are  preserved,  will  best  depict  the  deep  and  varied  exercises 
of  her  mind  under  this  overwhelming  calamity.  Addressing 
her  eldest  son,  then  in  Bermuda,  who,  on  receiving  the  tidings 
of  his  father's  death,  hastened  to  England,  she  thus  writes : — 

"My  precious  Child, —  ^^ew  York,  1816. 

"  Your  dear  mother  is  imder  the  chastening  hand  of 
God.  My  dear  suffering  infant  lies  a  corpse :  and  the  letter 
containing  the  intelligence  of  your  dear  father's  and  my  beloved 
husband's  death,  was  this  day  put  into  my  hands.  I  am  hum- 
bled under  the  mighty  hand  of  God.  My  soul  is  bowed  down. 
The  death  of  my  child  was  almost  overwhelming;  but  the 
death  of  my  dear,  my  precious,  my  ever-to-be-lamented  hus- 
band, is  the  heaviest  afSiction  I  have  ever  met  with.  I  trust 
the  Lord  will  yet  enable  me  to  say,  Thy  ivill,  0  God,  not 
mine,  he  done  !  I  wish  you  could  have  been  there.  Oh,  that 
you  had  been  in  time  to  have  closed  his  eyes !  I  need  com- 
fort. I  am  in  a  strange  place.  The  Lord  help  me  and  in- 
crease my  faith !  The  Lord  have  mercy  upon  me,  for  I  am  in 
trouble.  I  trust  his  soul  and  the  dear  departed  spirit  of  my 
infant  are  now  rejoicing  together  in  glory.  That  is  my  only 
comfort.  I  am  too  much  afflicted  to  write  more.  May  God 
bless  you,  my  child,  prays  your  truly  afflicted,  widowed  mother." 

But  overwhelming  as  was  this  affliction,  God,  whose  chast- 
enings  are  always  tempered  with  mercy,  left  her  not  without 
strong  consolation.  It  was  not  in  unmitigated  and  hopeless 
grief  that  she  wept.  The  last  illness  and  closing  scene  of 
Captain  Winslow's  life  afforded  satisfactory  evidence  that  he 
had  sought  and  found  the  Saviour.  His  conviction  of  sin  was 
deep,  and  his  believing  reliance  upon  the  atoning  merits  of  the 
Bedeemer  earnest  and  childlike.  He  died  in  the  assured  hope 
of  an  humble  penitent,  a  sincere  believer,  "looking  for  the 
mercy  of  our  Lord  Jesus  Christ  unto  eternal  hfe."  Such  was 
the  inexpressible  comfort  provided  by  Him  whose  hand  had 
now  slain  her  fondest  earthly  treasure.  She  now  saw  the 
fruit  of  her  long  travail  of  soul.  Her  prayers  were  answered, 
though  as  by  fire.  "  Thou  calledst  in  trouble,  and  I  delivered 
thee  ;  I  answered  thee  in  the  secret  place  of  thunder :  I  proved 
thee  at  the  w^aters  of  Meribah."  The  long-sought  mercy 
came  —her  husband  was  saved ;  but  the  blessing  was  draped 
in  woe.     '  By  terrible  things  in  righteousness'  God  had  an- 


INCONSOLABLE   GRIEF.  61 

swered  her,  and  her  '  song  was  of  mercy  and  judgment.'  The 
blow  fell,  however,  with  crushing  effect.  Her  mental  dis- 
tress seemed  to  baffle  the  kindest  efforts  of  her  pastor  and  her 
friends  to  soothe.  Her  soul  refused  to  be  comforted.  To  the 
deep  son:ow  of  bereavement  was  now  added  the  yet  deeper 
anguish  of  spiritual  darkness  and  despondency.  Satan  was 
permitted  to  buffet  her,  and,  for  a  time,  the  dark  waters  went 
over  her  soul.  Thus  the  calamity  that  at  once  withered  her 
lovely  flower,  and  broke  the  'strong  staff  and  the  beautiful 
rod,'  was  augmented  by  a  momentary  suspension  of  the  Di- 
vine presence.  It  was  at  this  juncture  the  following  hymn  of 
her  favourite  author,  Newton,  read  casually  to  her  by  her  son 
E ,  spoke  the  first  consolation  to  her  sad  heart. 

"  I  ask'd  the  Lord  that  I  might  grow 
In  faith,  and  love,  and  every  grace, 
Might  more  of  his  salvation  know, 
And  seek  more  earnestly  his  face. 

"  'Twas  he  who  taught  me  thus  to  pray. 
And  he,  I  trust,  has  answered  prayer ; 
But  it  has  been  in  such  a  way 
As  almost  drove  me  to  despair. 

"  I  hoped  that  in  some  favour'd  hour 
At  once  he'd  answer  my  request, 
And  by  his  love's  constraining  power 
Subdue  my  sins,  and  give  me  rest. 

"Instead  of  this,  he  made  me  feel 
The  hidden  evils  of  my  heart. 
And  let  the  angry  powers  of  hell 
Assault  my  soul  in  every  part. 

"  Yea,  more  ;  with  his  own  hand  he  seem'd 
Intent  to  aggravate  my  woe, — 
Cross'd  all  the  fair  designs  I  schemed, 
Blasted  ray  gourds,  and  laid  me  low. 

"  '  Lord  !  why  is  this  ?'  I  trembling  cried : 
'  Wilt  thou  pursue  thy  worm  to  death  V 

'  'Tis  in  this  way,'  the  Lord  replied, 
'  I  answer  prayer  for  grace  and  faith. 

"  '  These  inward  trials  I  employ. 

From  self  and  pride  to  set  thee  free  ; 
And  break  thy  schemes  of  earthly  joy, 
That  thou  may'st  seek  thy  all  in  me.'  " 


62  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

How  well  calculated  were  these  richly  experimental  breath- 
ings to  pour  the  oil  of  soothing  over  the  broken  waters  now 
surging  her  soul !  Bereaved  Christian,  the  same  fount  of  con- 
solation is  yours.  Approach,  and  drink  abundantly.  Your 
pleasant  picture  is,  perhaps,  destroyed,  your  beauteous  flower 
has  faded,  your  sheltering  arm  is  withered ;  but  Jesus  is  yours, 
your  deathless  Friend,  the  Brother  born  for  your  adversity, 
and  you  have  in  Him  all,  and  infinitely  more,  that  was  lovely 
and  loving,  tender  and  protective,  in  the  treasure  you  have 
lost.  This  is  but  the  Lord's  all-wise  and  righteous  mode  of 
drawing  you  into  a  greater  nearness  to  Himself. 

We  continue  a  few  of  the  letters  addressed  to  her  eldest 
son  at  this  period  of  her  grief.  "What  a  beauteous  bow  ap- 
pears in  the  dark  cloud  of  her  afiQictions  !  Blessed  disciphne 
that  results  in  such  weanedness ! 

"  My  dearest  Child, —  Kew  York,  Feb.  7,  1816. 

"  I  have  but  little  spirits  to  write,  but  as  I  know  you 
will  be  anxious  to  hear  from  me,  I  have  struggled  with  my 
feelings  to  gratify  you.  The  Lord  has  indeed  laid  His  chast- 
ening hand  upon  your  afflicted  mother.  My  precious,  my 
beloved  husband  I  shall  see  no  more  in  the  flesh.  But,  oh, 
what  a  comfort  to  my  soul  that  I  shall  meet  liim  at  the  right 
hand  of  God  !  I  grieve  at  his  sufferings,  and  in  imagination  I 
am  ever  hovering  round  his  bed.  My  soul  has  been  bowed 
down,  and  I  was  afraid  I  should  at  first  sink  under  so  heavy 
an  affliction.  Wave  upon  wave,  bitter  upon  bitter.  But  the 
Lord  has  said,  As  thy  day,  so  shall  thy  strength  he;  and  He  has 

been  faithful  to  His  promise.     E has  proved  himself  a 

dear  child ;  he  has  been  everything  to  me,  at  this  trying  time, 
that  I  could  wish.  How  gracious  is  the  Lord  to  me  !  It  is 
my  Father  that  has  chastened  me,  and  it  shall  be  for  my  good 
and  His  glory.  Now,  my  precious  child,  you  are  my  most 
anxious  concern.  You  will  need  wisdom  from  above  to  direct, 
and  grace  to  uphold  you  every  moment.  Keep  close  to  a 
throne  of  grace,  and  doubt  not  the  God  of  all  grace  will  give 

you  both.     Give  my  love  to .     It  soothed  my  sorrow  to 

know  that  I  possessed  the  love  and  friendship  of  some  of  God's 

dearest,  choicest  people.     Tell  dear  Miss  M I  feel  very 

grateful  for  her  letter ;  for  though  it  cost  me  many  tears,  yet 
it  was  by  far  the  most  satisfactory  one  I  have  had,  and  my 
heart  has  thanked  her  for  it  a  thousand   times.     Oh,  that  I 


LETTERS   TO    HER   SON.  63 

could  have  sat  by  his  bedside  as  slie  did !  Mysterious  are  the 
ways  of  God  !  This  bereaving  providence  has  done  more  to 
wean  me  from  the  world,  and  show  me  the  importance  of  eter- 
nal things,  than  you  can  imagine.  Blessed  be  God  for  all  His 
dispensations,  the  evil  as  well  as  the  good. 

****** 

"  I  am  at  times  miserable  indeed  beyond  conception.  Past 
scenes  crowd  upon  my  mind,  and  unavailing  regrets  seem  to 
overwhelm  my  better  feelings.  I  have  truly  been  laid  low  in 
the  dust,  and  abhor  myself  as  the  chief  of  sinners.  For  some 
days  Satan  desired  to  have  me,  to  sift  me  as  wheat ;  darkness 
overpowered  my  mind ;  doubts  and  fears  respecting  my  ever- 
lasting safety  crowded  upon  me.  This,  too,  was  after  I  had 
thought  myself  resigned  to  the  will  of  God,  and  began  to  be 
interested  in  my  family  concerns.  I  see  it  was  the  enemy. 
Oh,  that  I  had  never  left  your  precious  father.  See  Mr.  Shep- 
herd, and  beg  he  will  relate  to  you  exactly  every  word  that 
passed  between  him  and  my  dear  husband  before  he  died.  My 
severe  trials  have  awakened  a  general  sympathy  among  the 
dear  people  of  God,  who  have  visited  and  endeavoured  to  com- 
fort me ;  but  vain  is  the  help  of  man  ;  God  alone  can  comfort. 
Dr.  Stamford,  an  excellent  minister,  called  upon  me,  and 
preached  afterwards  a  sermon  on  the  occasion  of  my  bereave- 
ment, from  the  words, — Shoio  me  wherefore  thou  contendest  with 
me;  but  I  could  not  hear  it,  though  I  am  told  it  was  excel- 
lent." 

While  it  is  painful  to  trace  the  bitter  and  unjust  self-accusa- 
tions contained  in  the  following  letter,  it  is  at  the  same  time 
delightful  to  observe  how  richly  the  '  rod '  '  blossomed '  with 
the  holy  fruits  of  her  deeply-sanctified  grief. 

"  My  beloved  Child, —  Xew  York,  May  28,  1816. 

"  I  have  received  your  letter  to-day,  for  which  I  have 
been  just  thanking  my  God  and  your  God,  the  Father  to  the 
fatherless  and  the  widow's  God.  I  am  thankful  that  He  has 
supported  you  under  the  severest  trial  you  have  been  called 
to  meet  with  since  you  entered  the  vale  of  tears — the  loss  of 
your  dear,  your  precious  father.  Neither  you  nor  I  knew  half 
his  worth.  The  Lord  gave  us  a  treasure,  but  we  knew  not 
its  value  until  too  late.  I  hope  this  has  been  a  sifting  time 
with  you,  as  it  has  been  with  your  poor  mother.  How  great 
a  backslider  have  I  been !     How  did  I  let  my  vile  heart  go 


Gi  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

out  after  covetoiisness,  and  wander  from  the  patli  of  duty,  when 
I  left  my  beloved  husband  !  Oh,  my  dear  child,  this  thought 
liad  well-nigh  drove  me  to  despair.  But,  blessed  be  the  rock 
of  my  salvation,  that,  though  in  some  measure  He  has  suffered 
me  to  be  sifted  as  wheat,  and  the  enemy  to  come  like  a  flood, 
the  Spirit  helped  my  infirmities,  and  I  was  through  Him  en- 
abled to  keep  a  fast  hold  on  the  covenant  ivMchis  ordered  in  all 
things  and  sure.  My  Father  has  chastened  me,  but  his  loving- 
kindness  he  has  not  taken  from  me,  nor  suffered  his  faithful- 
ness to  fail.  It  has  been  good  for  me  that  I  have  been  afflict- 
ed. Oh,  my  child,  self-righteousness,  self-will,  and  a  covetous 
spirit  have  led  me  far  astray ;  but  the  Lord  has  overruled  even 
these  hated  sins  for  my  good,  and  the  salvation  of  the  precious 
soul  of  your  dear  beloved  father.  All  is  well.  Soon  Ave  shall 
meet  again ;  and  this  is  my  great  consolation.  We  are  in  a 
strange  land ;  but  the  God  of  Jacob  is  my  God,  and  the  God 
of  my  fatherless  ones.  England  is  highly  privileged  for  the 
precious  means  of  grace  ;  but  we  have  here  the  simple  truths 
of  the  gospel,  and  much  sterling  piety  amongst  professors. 
.  .  .  Lord,  have  mercy  upon  me,  and  let  me  see  Thy  hand 
in  this  !  Lead  my  mind  to  contemplate  him  where  he  now  is. 
For  millions  of  worlds  would  he  not  return.  But  still  my 
widowed  heart  aches,  and  will  ache  while  I  live ;  and  yet  I 
trust  the  Lord  has  reconciled,  or  will  reconcile  me  to  His 
blessed  will.  But  I  have  touched  a  chord  that  unfits  me  al- 
most for  everything. 

"May  the  Lord  watch  over  you,  and  bring  you  in  safety  to 
me.  I  have  so  many  mercies  for  which  I  desire  to  be  thank- 
ful, but  I  am  full  of  misgivings  and  unbelief,  often  ready  to 
exclaim.  All  these  things  are  against  me  !  The  Lord  has  sup- 
ported me  under  a  heavy  and  deep  affliction ;  what  more  lies 
before  me,  He  only  knows  loho  ivorketh  all  things  after  the 
counsel  of  His  own  ivill.  My  mind  is  often  greatly  exercised, 
but  the  Lord  has  said,  Leave  thy  fatherless  children  ;  I  will  pre- 
serve them  alive.  To  Him  do  I  desire  to  look,  and  in  Him  will 
I  trust.  The  promise  is,  Seek  ye  first  the  kingdom  of  God  and 
His  righteousness,  and  all  things  else  shall  he  added  unto  you. 
Did  I  not  hope  to  see  the  salvation  of  the  Lord  in  the  land  of 
the  living,  I  should  sink  in  despair.  Oh,  your  dear  father !  I 
mourn.  It  is  no  sin  to  weep :  Jesus  wept  at  the  grave  of 
Lazarus ;  Mary  and  Martha  wept ;  and  may  not  I  also  weep  ? 
I  wish  you  would  ,g;o  to  tlie  vault  whore  your  dear  father  lies, 


LETTERS   TO    HER   SON.  65 

and  see  if  tliere  is  room  for  your  poor  unworthy  mother  too — 
I  wish  to  lay  my  bones  by  him ;  if  you  can  do  this  without 
too  much  distressing  your  own  feelings.  I  cannot  account  for 
it,  but  it  has  been  the  constant  desire  of  my  heart,  (as  I  can- 
not see  it  myself,)  that  you  should  see  the  coffin  that  contains 
his  beloved  body.  I  shall  see  that  body  again,  shining  more 
gloriously  than  the  brightest  angel  in  heaven." 

TVe  w^ill  not  longer  detain  the  reader  on  this  mournful  part 
of  her  history,  than  to  quote  a  short  extract  from  one  of  her 
letters  to  her  eldest  son,  which  blends  a  cheering  lio-ht  with 
the  dark  shadows  in  this  picture  of  woe.  It  is  instructive,  and 
to  the  afflicted  believer  encouraging,  to  behold  the  sparklings 
of  the  gold  amidst  the  '  fires '  of  the  furnace. 

"At  times  my  spirits  are  low,  but  I  know  it  is  for  my  good 
that  I  have  been  afflicted ;  and  I  see  plainly  why  it  has  been 
permitted,  and  have  to  acknowledge  that  the  Lord,  even  in 
this,  has  not  chastened  me  according  to  my  backslidings.  I 
see  love  and  mercy  directing  this  stroke,  and  I  trust  it  will  be 
abundantly  sanctified  to  my  soul.  Your  dear  father  is  now 
rejoicing  amongst  the  redeemed,  and  it  will  not  be  long  before 
we  shall  meet  again  to  part  no  more  for  ever.  I  have  indeed 
been  humbled  to  the  very  dust,  and  my  mind  brought  into 
greater  darkness  and  distress  than  I  ever  experienced  before, 
in  addition  to  my  great  loss.  I  often  sat  upon  the  floor,  and 
wept  aloud  in  an  agony  of  mind  impossible  to  describe  ;  but 
the  Lord  has  put  the  enemy  to  flight,  and  again  blest  me  with 
a  sense  of  His  loving-kindness ;  so  that  my  mind,  upon  the 
whole,  is  comfortable  and  stayed  upon  my  God.  Tribulation 
must  be  felt,  or  it  would  not  he  tribulation ;  and  it  is  needful. 
I  think  I  have  learnt  more  of  my  dreadfully  wicked  heart,  and 
the  preciousness  of  Jesus,  during  this  trial,  than  I  ever  learnt 
before.  It  has  been  a  bitter  disciphne,  but  I  hope,  with  God's 
blessing,  it  will  bring  forth  the  2:>eaceable  fruits  of  righteousness  ; 
tending  to  wean  me  from  the  world  and  from  self,  and  causing 
me  to  know  where  my  great  strength  lieth.  Let  us  go  to  the 
Lord,  who  knows  best,  for  direction ;  taking  care  not  to  lay 
down  a  plan  for  om-selves,  before  we  ask  His  counsel,  lest  He 

leave  us  to  smart  for  our  folly.     Thank  Mrs.  H ,  and  tell 

her  I  shall  never  forget  her  kindness  to  my  dear  husband.  It 
was  like  a  Christian,  and  may  the  Lord  bless  her  a  thousand 
times  for  it.  My  heart  is  full,  and  I  am  weeping  while  I 
write." 


66  MEMOIR   OP   MRS.   MARY  WINSLOW. 

The  most  touching  review  of  this  part  of  her  history,  written 
maii}^  years  after,  is  from  a  narrative  addressed  to  her  family. 
AVe  have  no  strong  predilection  in  favour  of  dreams,  nor  did 
the  subject  of  this  Memoir  regard  them  with  superstitious  rev- 
erence ;  and  yet  of  old  the  Lord  did  sometimes  make  known 
His  will  by  dreams,  and  even  appointed  individuals  especially 
to  interpret  them.  It  was  in  a  dream  that  the  mystic  ladder 
appeared  to  Jacob  ;  it  was  by  a  dream  that  prophetic  revela- 
tions were  made  to  Joseph  ;  and,  under  the  New  Testament 
dispensation,  it  was  still  by  a  dream  that  the  angel  of  the  Lord 
appeared  to  Joseph,  the  husband  of  Mar}^,  on  several  occasions. 
And  among  the  signs  of  the  universal  spread  of  the  Gospel, 
we  are  prophetically  told  this  shall  be  one.  "  It  shall  come 
to  pass,  that  I  will  pour  out  my  Spirit  upon  all  flesh  ;  your 
sons  and  your  daughters  shall  j^rophesy ;  your  old  men  shall 
dream  dreams ;  your  young  men  shall  see  visions."*  We 
would  be  cautious  therefore,  of  speaking  lightly  of  this  mode 
of  producing  sacred  impressions  on  the  mind.  "  In  thoughts, 
from  the  visions  of  the  night,  when  deep  sleep  falleth  on 
man,"f  we  know  not  Avhat  communications  God  may  make, 
what  tf  uths  He  may  illustrate,  or  what  lessons  He  may  teach. 
We  should  keep  in  mind,  however,  that  the  revealed  word  of 
God  is  our  only  and  sure  '  word  of  prophecy,  to  which  we  do 
well  that  we  take  heed  as  unto  a  light  that  shineth  in  a  dark 
place.'  It  is  thus  Mrs.  Winslow  narrates  her  mental  exercises 
at  this  time: — 

"  Soon  after  I  was  brought  to  the  feet  of  Jesus,  I  had  a  re- 
markable dream ;  and  although  I  place  but  little  confidence  in 
dreams  in  general,  I  think  this  did  mean  something.  I  thought 
I  was  in  the  cabin  of  a  ship  in  the  midst  of  the  ocean.  There 
were  others  with  me.  We  appeared  to  face  the  windows  of 
the  cabin,  from  which  alone  we  had  light.  I  appeared  with 
others,  struggling  to  get  nearer  to  the  hght,  but  some  invisible 
being  seemed  to  draw  us  back  at  every  step  we  advanced  to- 
wards the  window.  And  still  the  struggle  continued.  My 
eyes  were  towards  the  light,  but  I  could  make  no  progress. 
Presently  the  roof  of  the  cabin  disappeared,  and  I  saw  one  like 
an  angel  coming  down  from  heaven.  He  approached  nearer 
and  nearer,  and  fixing  his  eyes  upon  me,  with  such  a  counte- 
nance of  compassion  and  love  I  cannot  describe,  said,  '  I  am 

*  Joel  IL  28.  f  Job  iv.  13. 


A    REMARKABLE    DREAM.  67 

with  thee.'  I  exclaimed  aloud,  '  It  is  the  Son  of  God  ! '  He 
then  ascended,  and  became  like  a  bird  in  the  air,  but  not  out 
of  sight.  Then  the  tormentors  commenced  again,  and  the 
struggle  to  get  disengaged  from  them  was  renewed.  Once 
more  the  same  blessed  Being  descended,  and  with  the  same 
benignant  look  repeated  the  words,  '  I  am  with  thee.'  While 
He  spake  all  was  quiet,  but  as  soon  as  He  ascended  as  before, 
the  battle  with  our  invisible  enemies  continued.  The  third 
time  He  came  down,  when  He  said,  '  I  \vill  be  with  thee  even 
unto  the  end.'  Every  object  instantly  disappeared.  He  took 
me  in  His  arms,  and  appeared  to  go  under  the  waves.  I  was 
tranquil,  and  felt  no  fear,  but  weary,  rested  my  head  upon  His 
bosom.  How  long  we  were  under  the  water  I  know  not,  but 
it  appeared  not  a  moment  ere  He  arose  with  me,  still  in  His 
arms,  and  ascended  towards  heaven ;  and  then  my  joy,  my 
ecstasy,  was  so  overwhelming,  my  bosom  heaved,  and  I 
awoke.  The  impression  left  upon  my  mind  by  this  '  vision  of 
the  night,'  I  have  never  lost.  What  appeared  but  a  dream 
has  since  become  a  reality.  How  has  the  Lord  upheld  me  in 
the  deep,  dark  waters,  not  suffering  them  to  overwhelm  me 
quite.  He  has  kept  my  head  above  them,  so  that  I  sank  not 
in  their  midst.  In  the  dark  night  of  my  weeping  He  was 
near ;  His  eye.  His  loving  eye,  was  upon  me.  God's  children 
came  to  me,  but  my  sorrow  seemed  too  deep  for  their  sympa- 
thy to  reach  :  they  endeavoured  to  comfort  me,  but  vain  was 
their  effort.  One  day,  when  alone,  my  heart  overwhelmed 
within  me,  a  man  of  God,  '  a  son  of  consolation, '  was  sent  to 
me.  He  drew  me  out  to  disclose  all  my  feelings,  my  doubts, 
and  misgivings  of  God's  love.  I  opened  my  heart  to  him  in 
perfect  confidence,  and  the  Spirit  enabled  him  to  open  his 
mouth  for  God.  He  unfolded  God's  eternal  and  unchangeable 
love  to  His  children,  and  proved  from  every  part  of  the  Sacred 
Volume,  that  it  was  not  because  I  was  not  His  child,  He  had 
chastened  me ;  but  because  I  was  His  child.  Long  and  faith- 
ful was  his  conversation,  and  oh,  how  comforting !  I  felt  all 
that  he  said.  Every  word  brought  conviction  to  my  mind 
and  comfort  to  my  heart.  'Then,'  I  exclaimed,  lifting  my 
eyes  to  heaven,  and  clasping  my  hands,  '  God  is  still  my 
Father,  my  reconciled  Father.'  Light  broke  into  my  be- 
nighted soul,  my  heart  opened  to  receive  the  message  the 
Lord  had  sent  by  His  dear  servant,  the  enemy  fled  from  me, 
and  I  w^as  comforted.     To  know  I  was  still  His,  and  that  His 


68  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

love  was  unchanged,  strengthened  me  to  look  up  to  Him  from 
whence  my  lielp  came.  I  was  comforted,  too,  by  a  letter  your 
dear  father  wrote  to  me  during  his  illness.  I  believe  tlie  Lord 
took  me  from  him  that  he  might  not  lean  upon  an  arm  of 
flesh  for  comfort,  but  upon  Himself  alone.  He  did  so.  He 
fled  to  Jesus,  and  was  saved.  The  Lord  had  taken  him  from 
the  evil  to  come  ;  and  now  I  was  to  gird  my  mind  to  bear  the 
burden  alone,  He  supported  me." 

We  are  henceforth  to  contemplate  Mrs.  Winslow  as  occu- 
pying a  new  and  untried  position  in  life,  involving  responsi- 
i^ilities  and  cares  of  no  ordinary  character.  She  was  now  a 
widow,  with  a  large  family  of  sons  dependent  upon  her  for 
their  training  and  settlement  in  life.  "  She  that  is  a  widow 
indeed,  and  desolate,  trusteth  in  God."  Such  was  her  present 
condition.  The  surges  of  grief  now  yielded  to  a  calm,  intel- 
ligent survey  of  her  position.  She  threw  herself  upon  God. 
The  covenant  she  made  with  him  when  a  wife,  she  now  and 
more  solemnly  renewed  as  a  widow, — that  the  Lord  should  be 
her  God.  It  was  at  this  important  crisis  of  her  history  that 
the  following  touching  incident  in  her  experience  occurred : — 

"  I  had  sent  one  of  my  sons,  a  youth  of  ten  years  old,  ac- 
companied by  a  servant,  across  the  river  on  a  matter  of  busi- 
ness. The  appointed  time  for  his  return  arrived,  but  he  did 
not  appear.  Hour  after  hour  passed  away,  and  nightfall  drew 
on,  but  he  came  not.  The  last  steamboat  touched  the  pier, 
but  he  was  not  on  board.  I  walked  my  room  for  hours  in 
prayer,  and  in  great  agitation  of  mind.  Keenly  did  I  then 
feel  my  lonely,  helpless  w^idowhood.  Again  and  again  I 
sought  the  Lord.  After  passing  hours  in  this  state  of  mental 
anxiety,  I  sent  a  brother  in  search,  and  soon  after,  all  made 
their  appearance.  He  had  missed  his  way.  The  Lord  heard 
a  mother's  prayer,  and  brought  him  in  safety  to  me.  After  all 
had  retired  for  the  night,  I  was  left  alone  with  God.  My 
mind  and  heart  had  been  greatly  exercised  throughout  the 
day.  I  felt  deeply  my  helplessness  and  responsible  situation. 
I  thought,  '  How  can  I,  a  helpless  woman,  care  for,  and  train 
up,  these  children  to  manhood  ? '  I  felt  I  should  sink  beneath 
the  overwhelming  conviction  of  my  weakness  and  insufficiency. 
I  paced  my  room  in  prayer,  tried  to  take  hold  of  a  promise ; 
but  all  was  dark,  the  present  and  the  future,  as  midnight.  It 
was  late  before  I  retired  to  rest.  In  vain  I  endeavoured  to 
compose  myself;  sleep  had  forsaken  me.     Again  I  lifted  up 


AN    ESPECIAL    PROMISE.  69 

my  heart  in  prayer.  I  tried  to  cease  from  thinking,  and  to 
close  my  eyehds,  but  in  vain.  All  night  I  continued  in  prayer, 
until  just  before  the  dawn  of  the  day  these  words  were  spoken 
to  my  ear  and  heart,  as  if  an  audible  voice  had  uttered  them  : 
'  I  WILL  BE  A  Father  to  thy  fathfrless  children.'  I 
knew  this  voice,  and  could  make  no  mistake.  So  powerful 
was  it,  I  instantly  replied  aloud,  '  0  Lord,  he  thou  the  Father 
of  my  fatherless,  0  my  God!'  Oh,  the  solemnity  of  that 
hour !  I  felt  G-od  was  with  me,  and  my  soul  was  filled  with 
joy  and  holy  reverence.  He  had  condescended  to  visit  my 
lone  room,  and  fill  it  with  His  presence.  He  had  come  to 
comfort  his  widowed  child,  and  I  ivas  comforted.  My  soul 
poured  out  its  grateful  acknowledgments.  I  could  adore,  and 
praise,  and  bless  His  holy  name.  A  solemn,  sacred  influence 
pervaded  the  place.  God  was  with  me,  of  a  truth.  Fatigued 
with  the  anxieties  of  the  day,  and  exhausted  with  the  mental 
exercises  through  which  I  had  passed  that  night,  I  composed 
myself  to  rest.  The  Lord  withdrew,  and  my  weary  eyes 
were  closed  in  refreshing  sleep.  Years  have  passed  since 
then,  and  the  Lord  has  not  for  one  moment  forgotten  His  prom- 
ise. But  I  take  the  promise  to  extend  beyond  this  poor 
dying  world.  Had  the  Lord  given  each  of  my  children  a 
w^orld,  and  they  should  lose  their  souls,  what  would  it  profit 
them  ?  I  believe  He  designs  to  be  their  Father  to  all  eternity, 
and  that  I  shall  meet  all,  all  my  children  in  heaven.  How 
often  have  I  gone  and  pleaded  this  promise  before  Him,  and 
have  always  found  my  faith  increased.  And  still  my  faith 
holds  out;  for  He  is  faithful  that  has  j^romised.'" 

From  the  moment  God  sealed  upon  her  sorrowing  heart  this 
especial  and  remarkable  promise,  causing  her  to  rest  in  His 
own  veracity  as  the  pledge  of  its  fulfilment,  she  became  ani- 
mated as  by  a  new  and  mighty  impulse.  Her  natural  spirits, 
unstrung  by  grief,  and  her  mental  powers,  paralyzed  by  anxiety, 
now  acquired  fresh  tone  and  energy.  An  overwhelming  pres- 
sure of  despondency  and  care  seemed  suddenly  and  entirely 
to  be  lifted  from  off  her  mind.  Strengthened  with  might  in 
the  inner  man,  she  cast  her  care  on  God ;  and  girding  herself 
anew  for  the  arduous  duties  to  which  he  now  summoned  her, 
with  a  calmness  ofjudgment,  a  firmness  of  resolution,  and  a 
reliance  of  faith,  equal  to  the  dignity  of  her  position,  she  cheer- 
fully met  and  vigorously  discharged  all  its  claims.  The  prom- 
ise thus  given  proved  as  a  sheet-anchor  to  her  soul  in  many 


70  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MiRY   WINSLOW. 

a  subsequent  hour  of  storm  and  cloud.  And  when  at  times — 
for  such  there  were— the  sentence  of  death  seemed  Avritten 
upon  it,  her  faith  in  God  never  faltered ;  giving  to  that  prom- 
ise, as  she  herself  tells  us,  its  widest  range  of  meaning,  she 
rose  al30ve  the  temporal  blessing  it  involved,  and  claimed,  as 
the  only  limit  of  its  fulfilment,  a  divine  heritage,  a  spiritual 
birthright,  an  eternal  home  for  her  orphan  ones.  She  knew 
that  she  had  to  do  with  a  Being,  all  whose  resources  of  power, 
wisdom  and  love  were  as  boundless  as  His  own  infinity ;  who 
was  not  only  a  prayer-hearing,  and  a  prayer-answering,  but  also 
a  prayer-exceeding  God ;  and  who,  in  the  bestowment  of  His 
blessings  upon  His  people,  never  gave  less,  but  always  more 
than  He  had  promised,  or  than  they  had  asked.  She  rea- 
soned— and  it  was  the  logical  reasoning  of  true  faith — that  if 
God,  in  the  lone  hours  of  that  night  of  weeping  and  of  prayer, 
had  engaged  to  be  a  Father  to  her  fatherless  children,  that  en- 
gagement bound  Him  to  them  as  their  Heavenly  Father.  To 
this  broad  interi^retation  of  the  pledge,  she  held  Him  with  a 
grasp  which  never  for  an  instant  relaxed.  And  when  she 
died,  it  was  in  the  firm,  unfaltering  faith  of  that  promise.  Not 
having  received  its  complete  fulfilment,  but  viewing  it  afar  off, 
she  was  persuaded  of  it,  embraced  it,  and  closed  her  eyes  with 
an  undimmed,  unshaken  assurance,  that  it  would  be  even  as 
God  had  said,  and  that  she  would  meet  again  all  the  children 
He  had  given  her — an  undivided  family  in  heaven. 

And  yet  it  must  not  be  inferred  from  this  that  her  path 
henceforth  was  never  beclouded  by  the  shadows  of  a  fluctuating 
faith,  or  that  she  was  no  more  of  an  anxious  and  a  doubtful 
mind.  Far  from  this.  Where  are  the  evidences  of  grace  in 
the  absence  of  infirmity  ?  And  where  the  victories  of  faith  in 
the  non-resistance  of  unbelief?  There  were  seasons — many 
indeed — when  she  was  cast  down  with  anxious  care  and  pain- 
ful foreboding.  Alone,  and  with  but  the  wreck  of  former 
affluence,  she  was  called  to  meet  the  growing  demands  of  a 
family  of  nine  sons,  fast  advancing  into  manhood.  It  was  only 
by  a  careful  husbanding  and  wise  expenditure  of  her  crippled 
resources  that  she  was  enabled  to  educate  them  for  professional 
life  ;  but  with  God's  blessing  upon  her  judicious,  self-sacrificing 
efforts  it  was  accomplished;  and  "her  children  rise  up  to  call 
her  blessed."  As  her  sons  advanced  in  years,  she  parted  from 
them,  one  by  one,  with  a  view  to  the  completion  of  their  edu- 
cation at  home.     There,  beneath  the  eye  of  her  elder  son,  who 


LETTER    TO    HER    SON.  71 

now  merged  the  relationship  of  an  elder  brother  in  the  higher 
one  of  a  foster-father,  they  were  trained  for  their  future  posi- 
tions in  life.  It  was  on  one  of  these  occasions  that  she 
penned  the  following  letter  to  one  of  her  sons,  then  a  youth, 
on  his  way  home  to  pursue  his  professional  studies,  and  now 
usefully  engaged  as  a  clergyman  of  the  Church  of  England  : — 

"  My  pkecious  George, —  New  York,  1818. 

"  I  hope  before  this  comes  to  hand  you  are  with 
your  dear  brother*  and  sister.  This  is  the  fourth  day  since 
you  left  me,  and  my  prayers  have  been  offered  up  for  you 
morning,  noon,  and  night ;  and  often  has  my  heart  ascended 
on  your  behalf,  when  I  have  been  otherwise  engaged.  "When 
my  weeping  eyes  followed  you,  I  felt  an  inexpressible  sweet- 
ness and  comfort  in  offering  up  this  short  prayer,  — '  Now, 
Father,  I  commit  this  child  into  Thy  hands.  Follow  him 
with  thy  blessing,  shield  him  from  every  evil,  carry  him  in 
safety  where  he  is  going,  and  let  him  be  Thine  for  time  and 
for  eternity.  Fulfil  Thy  promise,  on  which  Thou  hast  caused 
Thine  handmaid  to  hope,  and  be  Thou  a  Father  to  her  father- 
less children.'  From  that  moment  my  heart  was  comforted, 
though  I  felt  the  separation.  The  night  was  wet  and  gloomy, 
and  I  followed  you  in  imagination  to  your  lonely  berth,  ill, 
and  wishing  yourself  by  our  comfortable  fireside  at  home.  I 
have  thought  of  you  almost  continually,  my  dear  boy ;  for  you 
are  now  without  a  friend  or  relative.  But  God  is  with  you, 
and  that  comforts  me.  Your  dear  brothers  tried  to  look  cheer- 
ful when  they  returned  to  me,  but  I  could  see  they  were  much 
affected.  While  I  am  writing,  you  are  at  this  moment  on  the 
mighty  deep  :  but,  as  Mrs.  Isabella  Graham  says,  '  it  is  God's 
ocean,' — my  God's. 

"  20th. — My  dear  G ,  when  we  all  gather  round  the 

evening  fireside,  I  find  myself  looking,  every  now  and  then, 
at  the  door,  expecting  to  see  you  enter ;  and  once  or  twice, 
when  we  have  been  going  to  read  the  Bible,  I  have  waited  a 
moment  or  two,  looking  round  for  an  absejit  one,  who  I  then 
recollected  was  far,  very  far  away  from  me.  How  often  have 
I  carried  you  in  the  arms  of  faith  to  a  throne  of  grace,  be- 
seeching the  Lord  to  put  His  hand  upon  you  and  bless  you. 
Oh,  my  child,  if  you  but  knew  the  blessedness  of  the  religion 

*  Her  eldest  son  T.,  then  recently  married  and  settled  in  England. 


72  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WJNSLOW. 

of  Jesus,  its  sweetness,  rich  enjoyment,  and  reality,  you  would 
not  rest  a  moment  until  you  could  call  the  Lord  your  own." 

To  her  eldest  son  she  thus  writes : — 

"  I  felt  so  distressed  through  the  whole  day  and  night,  at 
not  hearing  from  you  on  the  arrival  of  the  packet,  that  to 
change  the  scene,  and  give  a  turn  to  my  thoughts,  I  set  out 

on  a  visit  to  my  sweet  E ,  at  Mrs.  B 's.*     I  should 

tell  you,  however,  that  I  had  heard  through  Captain that 

G was  well,  though  he  had  not  reached  you.     For  this,  I 

failed  not  to  thank  my  God,  and  to  implore  His  aid  to 
strengthen  me,  and  enable  me  to  bear  up  under  this  and  every 
other  disappointment  and  trial,  through  what  His  infinite  wis- 
dom should  see  fit  I  should  pass  while  on  my  pilgrimage 
through  this  wilderness.  I  felt  sensible  I  was  aiming  in  my 
own  strength  to  be  resigned  to  His  will  and  to  trust  Him  ; 
and  knowing  how  impossible  it  was  for  me  to  do  this,  went  to 
His  footstool  and  confessed  my  weakness  and  total  inability  to 
do  anything  without  Him.  And  oh !  how  graciously  does  He 
at  all  times  deal  with  His  unworthy  child,  His  ungrateful,  un- 
believing child.      B is  in  affliction,  and  I  am  obliged  to 

remind  her  of  the  faithfulness  of  our  God,  His  promises.  His 
boundless  love  towards  His  children  ;  His  power  and  goodness 
enabling  Him  to  perform  them  all;  and  in  doing  so,  my  own 
spirits  are  revived,  my  own  faith  and  confidence  increased  by 
the  recital;  and  I  am  helped  thereby  to  go  on  from  day  to 
day  with  a  cheerfulness,  under  circumstances  which  I  should 
have  thought,  formerly,  would  have  made  me  lose  my  reason 
or  break  my  heart.  I  speak  not  of  want ;  for,  blessed  be  His 
holy  name.  He  has  never  suffered  me  to  want  any  good  thing 
that  was  absolutely  necessary  for  me;  for  I  am  certain,  that 
what  I  have  thought  I  wanted,  it  were  better  I  should  want; 
for  had  it  not  been  so,  infinite  love  would  have  given  it  me." 

"December  26th. — My  soul  longs  for  the  privilege  of  again 
hearing  a  full  gospel.  I  feel  my  poverty,  and  my  need  of 
Christ,  more  and  more But  I  do  believe  these  exer- 
cises of  soul,  which  I  often  have  in  consequence  of  this  low 
state  of  spiritual  enjoyment,  will  ultimately  prove  to  my  ad- 
vantage, and  for  the  glory  of  God.  My  choicest  seat  is  at  the 
foot  of  the  cross.  When  I  can  but  view  His  bleeding  w^ounds, 
and  obtain  one  glance  by  faith  of  His  gracious  countenance,  it 

*  The  boarding-school  at  which  her  daughter  was  placed. 


HER    BAPTISM.  73 

is  worth  a  thousand  worlds  to  me.  Nothing  else  can  give  me 
joy  an.d  comfort.  I  have  had  not  a  few  battles  with  Satan, 
as  it  respects  past  experience,  and  have  been  put  to  my  wits' 
end;  but  I  find  it  is  the  safest  to  keep  close  to  Jesus;  and  as 
I  came  at  first,  so  I  come  again  and  again ;  in  this  way  the  foe 
is  defeated,  and  my  soul  is  melted  with  love,  while  He  lifts 
upon  me  His  heavenly  countenance." 

If  there  were  one  feature  in  the  religious  character  of  Mrs. 
Winslow  more  distinct  and  palpable  than  any  other,  and  which, 
as  her  Christianity  ripened,  became  a  yet  more  strongly  de- 
veloped, firmly  rooted,  and  all-controlling  principle  of  her  life, 
it  was  the  profound  homage  with  which  her  whole  soul  bowed 
to  the  supreme  authority  of  God's  revealed  word.  To  her 
enlightened  view,  no  doctrine  was  propounded  in  the  Bible, 
the  belief  of  which  was  a  matter  of  indifference ;  and  no  pre- 
cept was  enjoined,  the  observance  of  which  was  a  question  of 
choice.  As  a  child  of  God,  to  obey  instantly  and  unquestion- 
ingly,  she  regarded  as  an  imperious  duty;  and  as  a  Christian 
disciple,  to  mould  her  walk  according  to  the  example  of  the 
Saviour,  she  counted  her  sweetest  privilege.  With  her,  hu- 
man opinion,  worldly  interest,  self-ease,  were  as  the  fine  dust 
in  the  balance  weighed  in  the  scale  with  her  Lord's  solemn 
and  comprehensive  injunction — "Teaching  them  to  observe 
all  things  whatsoever  I  have  commanded  you."  Influenced 
by  this  principle — a  principle  which  governed  the  lowliest  ac- 
tions of  her  life — and  in  compliance  with  what  she  interpreted 
as  a  divine  and  positive  injunction,  we  find  her  avowing  her 
faith  in  Christ,  and  dedicating  herself  anew  to  the  Lord,  in 
the  solemn  rite  of  believers'  baptism. 

The  spiritual  reader,  who  may  not  see  eye  to  eye  with  her 
on  this  subject — and  there  will  be  many  such — cannot  yet  fail 
to  approve  the  principle  which  governed  her,  and  to  reverence 
the  conscienciousness  which  dictated  the  step.  Addressing 
her  mother  from  New  York,  she  writes : — 

"  I  trust  you  will,  by  God's  blessing,  be  able  to  come  to  us 
in  the  spring.  I  had  intended  to  have  written  to  you  with 
respect  to  my  baptism,  but  the  subject  requires  a  clearer  head 
and  a  mind  less  agitated  than  mine  is  at  present.  But,  my 
beloved  mamma,  I  saw  it  to  be  a  plain  and  positive  command 
of  Christ,  and  I  am  called  to  obey  Him,  as  far  as  He  gives  me 
light  so  to  do.  I  have  for  years  been  impressed  with  the  im- 
portance of  the  subject.  I  read  in  my  Bible  that  only  those 
4 


74  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

who  helieved,  or  had  true  faith,  were  the  scriptural  subjects  of 
baptism ;  ivhosoever  beh'eveth  and  is  haptizcd.  Infants  cannot 
believe,  and  consequently  baptism,  in  their  case,  loses  its  sig- 
nificance. Nor  could  I,  in  all  my  examination,  find  a  solitary 
passage  or  example  in  the  New  Testament,  that  wnll  lead  me 
to  the  conclusion  for  a  moment,  that  children  were  baptized  in 
the  early  church.  But  in  the  time  of  the  apostles,  as  soon  as 
sinners,  or  adults,  were  called  through  grace  to  believe,  they 
were  baptized  and  added  to  the  church,  I  shall  some  time 
hence  write   more  fully  to  you  on  the   subject.      I  have  not 

heard  from  T since  he  sailed  for  England  ;  but  the  Lord 

is  my  help,  and  in  every  trial  and  trouble  my  soul  looks  to  and 
and  leans  upon  Him,  and  I  am  comforted." 

In  the  midst  of  her  personal  sorrow  and  domestic  duties  she 
found  time  for  walks  of  practical  Christian  usefulness.  In 
one  of  these  rambles  she  met  with  the  following  remarkable 
instance  of  the  grace  of  God  in  a  poor  idiot  girl :  "  The  en- 
trance of  Thy  word  giveth  light;  it  giveth  understanding  unto 
the  simple,"  Such  was  the  case  with  poor  Ellen,  who  had  been 
brought  to  a  knowledge  of  the  truth  through  the  instrumiental- 
ity  of  the  Rev.  Archibald  Maclay,  the  then  esteemed  pastor 
of  Mrs.  Winslow.  On  every  other  subject  but  the  love  of 
Christ  to  her,  the  mind  of  the  poor  idiot  was  a  perfect  blank. 
But  on  this,  the  deepest  and  sublimest  of  all  themes,  she  spake 
with  a  sincerity  and  earnestness  of  feeling  which  the  most 
eloquent  language  could  not  express.  In  one  of  her  letters, 
Mrs,  Winslow  details  an  interesting  visit  to  this  pious  imbe- 
cile : — 

"  I  entered  the  little  room.  It  was  clean  and  tidy,  with  a 
bed  in  one  corner  farthest  from  the  fire,  by  the  side  of  Avhich, 
in  an  old  arm  chair,  sat  an  idiot  girl  about  seventeen  years 
of  age.  She  was  dressed  neatly,  and  looked  happy,  though 
ill.  Her  mother,  a  respectable -looking  woman,  was  by  her 
side.  I  took  an  offered  chair,  and  draAving  near  the  girl,  asked 
her  how  she  was.  She  replied,  'Sick.'  'And  what  have  you 
in  your  lap?'  pointing  to  a  book  which  lay  there.  She  opened 
it,  and  with  an  expression  of  delight  I  shall  not  soon  forget, 
reached  it  to  me.  It  was  the  New  Testament.  'Do  you  love 
the  Lord,  my  dear  child?'  'Oh,  yes,'  she  replied,  though  with 
great  difficulty;  'Jesus  is  good.'  'He  is  good,  my  poor  child; 
what  a  mercy  for  you  that  He  has  enabled  you  to  know  it.' 
'Oh,  yes,'  she  repeated  again,   'Jesus  is  good.     Mr.  Maclay 


A   PIOUS    IDIOT.  75 

good  man;  Mr.  Maclaj  tell  poor  Ellen  of  Jesus.'  I  turned  in- 
quiringly to  her  mother,  who  told  me  her  simple,  affecting 
story.  She  had  a  year  or  two  back  been  convinced  that  she 
was  a  sinner,  and  her  distress  of  mind  in  consequence  was  so 
great,  that  it  brought  on  the  illness  (paralysis)  with  which  she 
is  now  affected.  Her  intellect,  feeble  from  her  birth,  is  now 
nearly  gone,  and  she  is  unable  to  understand  little  else  but 
that  'Jesus  is  good,  and  loves  poor  Ellen,'  and  this  is  her  con- 
stant cry.  She  is  always  reading  her  New  Testament,  which, 
with  a  hymn-book,  is  her  constant  companion.  She  was  very 
attentive  to  all  I  said  of  the  Lord,  and  listened  with  great 
eagerness.  I  read  to  her  a  hymn  she  gave  me,  and  then,  look- 
ing earnestly  in  my  face,  she  said,  pausing  between  each  word. 
In — my — Father  s  —  house — are — many — mansions.  As  she 
could  with  difficulty  speak,  I  repeated  to  her  the  following 
verses.  But,  oh,  what  an  expression  of  joy  and  delight  did 
she  manifest!  Her  whole  body  was  convulsed,  and  her  ecstasy 
seemed  too  much  for  her  poor  shattered  frame  to  bear.  She 
spread  both  her  hands  before  her  face,  while  tears  of  joy  stood 
in  her  eyes.  As  soon  as  she  could  speak,  'Jesus  is  good; 
Jesus  loves  poor  Ellen,'  were  the  words  which  seemed  most 
fully  to  express  her  whole  heart.  So  great  was  her  agitation, 
and  so  incessantly  and  rapidly  were  these  words  repeated,  I 
was  compelled  to  lay  my  hands  gently  upon  her,  and  soothe 
her  to  silence.  When  I  left  her  humble  abode,  I  thought, 
'There  dwells  an  heir  of  glory,  a  joint  heir  with  Christ  Jesus, 
in  a  cellar  kitchen,  rich  in  faith.'  Oh,  how  true  the  precious 
word  of  God:  God  hath  chosen  the  foolish  things  of  the  world, 
and  weak  things  of  the  ivorld,  and  base  things  of  the  world,  and. 
things  ivhich  are  despised,  and  things  which  are  not,  that  no  flesh 
should  glory  in  his  j^resence,^^ 

She  was  not  without  her  severe  conflicts  of  faith;  yet  we 
always  trace  in  her  experience  the  irrepressible  energy  of  this 
mighty  grace  under  circumstances  of  its  deepest  trial.  Ad- 
dressing her  children  from  New  York,  she  says: 

".  .  .  .  I  have  nothing  new  myself  to  communicate  to 
you,  but  I  feel  a  desire  to  say  to  you  all  this  evening,  'How 
are  you?'  'Is  it  well  with  you?'  'Is  it  well  with  your  chil- 
dren?' It  will  be  a  long  time  before  I  can  get  an  answer. 
But  my  God  is  your  God ;  and  though  a  vast  ocean  divides  us. 
He  is  present  with  us  both,  and  has  engaged  that  it  shall  be 
well;  yea,  that  it  is  weU  with  his  people.    What  a  mercy  that 


76  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

a  throne  of  grace  is  accessible  to  us  both,  and  at  the  same  time 
where  we  meet  in  Christ,  and  under  the  influence  of  the  same 
Spirit  commend  each  other  to  the  tender  care  of  our  dear  Re- 
deemer, who  has  undertaken  to  manage  all  our  concerns.  Oh 
that  I  could  at  all  times  take  the  comfort  of  this  precious  truth, 
and  be  careful  for  nothing,  but  with  prayer  and  thanksgiving 
make  all  my  requests  known  to  the  Lord.  My  faith  is  but 
small  at  present;  sometimes  I  stand  in  doubt  whether  I  have 
any  at  all;  and  there  have  been  seasons  when  I  have  been 
tempted  to  think  I  never  had  known  the  grace  of  God  in  truth. 
For  some  months  past  I  have  had  sharp  conflicts  with  my  cor- 
rupt nature  and  the  old  adversary ;  and  when  I  have  cried  out 
in  agony  of  soul,  'Lord,  have  mercy!  Lord,  hear!  can  I  be 
thine?  can  I  be  thy  child?'  this  passage  of  Scripture  has  in- 
variably presented  itself  to  my  mind.  Cast  not  away  your  con- 
fidence^ which  hath  great  recompense  of  reward.  I  thought  it 
strange  that  this  passage  was  ever  on  my  mind,  so  that  I  could 
repeat  it  aloud  as  I  walked  the  streets.  Nevertheless,  I  am 
still  called  to  follow  as  under  a  cloud.  I  feel  my  vileness,  my 
unprofitableness,  my  woful  shortcomings,  and  am  thankful  if  I 
can  but  only  creep  to  the  foot  of  the  cross,  and  there  repose 
my  weary  soul  refreshed  by  one  look  at  Jesus,  who,  1  do  trust, 
died  for  my  sins.  But  oh,  I  want  to  be  more  conformable 
to  His  lovely  image,  to  be  sanctified,  body,  soul,  and  spirit, 
and  to  have  every  power  of  my  mind  under  the  constant  influ- 
ence of  the  Holy  Spirit.  You,  too,  have  in  some  degree  been 
in  the  furnace,  but  I  trust  it  has  been  sanctified  to  you  both. 
You  have  gone  on  so  prosperously  that  it  was  time  for  the 
Lord  to  try  your  grace.  The  faith  that  is  not  tried  is  doubt- 
ful. Trials  and  crosses  test  the  Christian's  faith  and  Christ's 
faithfulness,  and  these  things  bring  rich  experience  to  the  be- 
liever's soul  which  otherwise  he  would  never  have  had. 

The  following  family  incident  will  interest  the  reader,  only 
so  far  as  afi'ording  an  illustration  of  Mrs.  Winslow's  energy  of 
character,  and  the  deep  religious  sentiment  w^hich  pervaded 
and  sanctified  all  her  secular  engagements.  There  is  a  passing 
allusion  to  one  of  the  most  catholic  Christians,  able  statesmen, 
and  distinguished  philanthropists  of  his  age.  With  William 
WiLBERFORCE  it  was  her  privilege  to  be  on  terms  of  sacred 
friendship.  His  "  Practical  View  of  Christianity"  was  one  of 
her  favourite  works;  and  in  the  early  stages  of  her  religious 
experience,  contributed  materially  to  mould  and  establish  her 


MEMORIAL   TO    THE   KING.  77 

opinions.  To  the  latest  period  of  life,  she  cherished,  for  the 
memory  of  this  illustrious  man,  feelings  of  the  most  profound 
veneration.  The  writer,  then  a  little  boy,  has  a  vivid  recol- 
lection of  accompanying  her  on  a  morning  visit  to  him  at  Ken- 
sington Gore,  and  of  receiving  some  confectionery,  offered  with 
the  most  winning  kindness,  from  those  hands  which,  more  than 
all  others,  had  laboured  to  wrench  the  shackles  from  the  slave. 
The  extract  that  follows  refers  to  a  presentation,  through  Mr. 
"Wilberforce,  of  claims  supposed  to  exist  upon  the  British  Gov- 
ernment for  the  confiscation  of  large  family  estates  in  the 
North  American  colonies,  when  those  colonies  separated  from 
the  Crown.  A  short  time  before  the  revolution,  the  Provin- 
cial Council,  which,  until  about  the  year  1765,  was  always 
the  aristocratic  branch  of  the  Legislature,  and,  of  course,  com- 
posed of  the  most  distinguished  individuals  in  the  country, 
had,  for  the  most  part,  become  attached  to  the  popular  party, 
and  hence,  in  opposition  to  the  Governor.*  In  consequence 
of  this,  commissions  were  granted  by  mandamus  to  distin- 
guish loyalists,  of  whom  the  father  of  Captain  Winslow  was 
one.  It  is  supposed,  however,  that  he  never  acted  under  this 
commission.  The  appointment  was  in  opposition  to  the  gene- 
ral sentiments  of  the  people,  which  soon  afterwards  terminated 
in  the  revolution  and  ultimate  separation  of  the  colonies  from 
the  mother  country.  The  consequence  of  the  acceptance  of 
this  office,  however,  was  the  rehnquishment  and  subsequent 
confiscation  of  a  large  family  property  in  Boston,  U.  S.,  and 
for  the  indemnification  for  such  a  sacrifice,  it  was  thought,  just 
claims  existed  upon  the  Government  at  home.  Writing  to 
her  son,  she  says  :  — 

"  I  must  now  tell  you  I  have  petitioned  the  King  with  re- 
spect to  your  dear  father's  claims.  You  may  remember  how 
often  he  intended  to  prefer  those  claims  himself,  on  account 
of  his  father's  services  and  his  own,  but  never  lived  to  put  his 
intentions  into  execution.  I  have,  therefore,  written  to  Mr. 
Wilberforce,  and  also  to  Lord  Dundas,  under  cover  of  my  peti- 
tion, urging  them  to  exert  themselves  on  my  behalf.  I  know 
that  I  shall  get  nothing  without  the  Lord's  blessing  attends  it ; 
but  the  hearts  of  Kings  and  Princes  are  in  His  hands ;  to  Him 
I  have  committed  the  thing,  and  hope  I  shall  be  satisfied, 
whatever  be  the  result.     Your  grandfather  Winslow  was  one 

*  Hutchinson. 


7B  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY   WINSLOW. 

of  the  King's  mandamus  Counsellors  in  Boston ;  and  durmg 
the  Revolution  he  quitted  it,  and  all  his  vast  property,  to  fol- 
low the  army,  but  died  before  he  reached  home.  In  conse- 
quence of  this,  your  father  lost  the  fortune  that  would  have 
been  his  on  coming  of  age.  Your  father  entered  the  British 
service  at  seventeen,  serving  both  at  home  and  abroad.  These 
are  the  outlines  of  my  claims  upon  Government,  and  I  men- 
tion them  to  you,  as  you  may  be  questioned  upon  the  subject. 
I  thought  it  would  be  worth  while  for  you  to  call  on  Mr.  Wil- 
berforce,  at  Kensington  Gore,  and  ascertain  if  there  is  any 
likelihood  of  the  claims  being  recognized.  I  have  referred  him 
to  Judge  Leonard,  who  knew  your  grandfather,  and  also  to 
Colonel  Backhouse,  under  whom  your  father  served  for  many 
years.  But  all  my  concerns  are  in  the  best  hands.  However, 
make  every  prudent  inquiry  about  it ;  and  may  He  who  is  the 
widow's  God  give  you  all  the  wisdom  that  you  may  need,  and 
follow  your  attempt  to  serve  your  mother  with  His  best  bless- 
ing. You  remember  when  the  widow,  whose  son  Elijah  had 
restored  to  life,  cried  to  the  king  for  her  lands,  the  prophet's 
servant  stood  by  and  pointed  her  out  to  him.  The  Lord 
opened  the  king's  heart,  and  her  request  was  granted,  even 
more  than  she  asked.  That  same  God  is  my  God,  and  still 
tuorketh  all  things  after  the  council  of  His  own  will.  Be  not 
faithless  hut  believing. ^^ 

Powerful  as  was  the  interest  with  which  this  memorial  was 
sustained,  it  failed  to  secure  a  response  to  the  prayer,  in  con- 
sequence of  the  length  of  time  that  had  elapsed  in  preferring 
the  claim.  But  higher  concerns  now  engaged  her  thoughts,  as 
will  appear  from  the  following  extracts  from  correspondence 
with  her  family :  — 

"  Your  grandmamma  seems  quite  young  again.  How  gra- 
ciously the  Lord  has  in  all  things  dealt  with  his  aged  hand- 
maid !  She  has  outlived  nearly  all  her  relatives  and  early 
friends ;  they  are  passed  into  eternity,  while  she  has  been 
spared,  and  blessed  to  her  old  age  with  a  knowledge  of  the 
truth,  and  with  a  stable  peace  and  reliance  upon  her  Saviour 
for  all  that  is  needful  for  time  and  for  eternity.  Her  frame 
and  feelings  are  seldom  very  lively,  but  her  faith  steady,  and 
her  peace  unceasing.  Her  spiritual  joy  is  not  great,  but  she 
goes  on  her  way  relying  on  God,  and  looking  forward  without 
a  fear  to  the  moment  when  she  will  be  called  to  pass  the  dreary 
valley  of  the  shadow  of  death.     While  I  have  my  changes, 


HER    COMMUNION  WITH   GOD.  79 

sometimes  rejoicing  in  my  Saviour,  and  triumphing  over  all 
that  opposes  my  way ;  at  other  times  cast  down,  feeling  my 
unworthiness,  and  afraid  of  deceiving  myself,  she  is  passing  on 
her  way  like  the  sun  without  a  cloud.  But  our  God  is  wise 
in  all  His  dispensations  towards  His  people,  and  all  my  exer- 
cises are  needful. 

"  Oct.  21st. — Oh  what  a  mercy  is  a  throne  of  grace  !  I  think 
I  never  knew  the  value  of  prayer  so  much  as  of  late.  Since  I 
have  parted  with  so  many  of  my  children,  I  feel  I  have  so 
much  more  to  do  with  God.  I  have  so  many  more  petitions 
to  present  for  you  all,  that  it  seems  to  me  a  more  constant  in- 
tercourse is  kept  up  between  my  soul  and  Jesus,  and  thereby 
enables  me  to  discover  such  a  fulness,  such  a  sufficiency,  such 
goodness,  and  boundless,  matchless  love,  that  at  times  I  can 
but  kneel  and  weep.  My  mind  is  led  from  earthly  things  to 
longing  desires  after  conformity  to  His  holy  likeness.  Oh,  to 
be  holy  !  How  beautiful  does  holiness  appear  to  be  !  To  be 
holy  is  to  be  happy.  May  the  Lord  sanctify  us  !  A  little 
while  and  we  shall  be  done  with  those  things  that  but  too  often 
encumber  us,  and  then,  oh,  what  glory  awaits  the  believing 
soul ! 

"January  17. — The  cold  is  intense.  Last  night,  while  in- 
terceding with  the  Lord  to  have  pity  upon  the  poor  and  needy, 
and  supply  their  wants  during  this  trying  season,  I  recollected 
a  widow  woman  had  called  on  me  for  help  a  week  ago,  but 
from  various  causes  I  had  done  nothing  in  her  case.  I  felt 
humbled  before  a  heart-searching  God  for  my  neglect,  and  this 
morning  I  set  off  and  found  out  her  abode,  above  the  Vaux- 
hall  Gardens.  Her  httle  stock  of  fuel  was  out ;  and  finding  it 
a  wortliy  case,  I  gave  her  a  note  to  the  Widows'  Society,  and 
no  doubt  she  will  be  supplied  with  a  load  of  wood.  I  then 
called  on  a  young  woman  in  a  consumption.  She  says  she 
has  no  hope  for  eternity.  I  directed  her  to  Jesus,  and  then 
left  her." 


CHAPTER    V. 

A  RESIDENCE  of  nearly  five  years  in  a  new,  and,  to  an 
European  constitution,  somewhat  trying  climate,  had  greatly 
impaired  her  health,  and  rendered  essential  to  its  recovery  a 
sea  voyage  and  a  season  of  entire  repose.  Accordingly,  in 
1820,  accompanied  by  one  of  her  sons,  she  recrossed  the  At- 
lantic, and  spent  four  or  five  months  with  the  elder  branches 
of  her  family.  Her  first  return  to  England  since  her  sore  be- 
reavement, it  were  not  difficult  to  imagine  what  would  be  the 
intensity  of  her  thoughts  and  feehngs  on  revisiting  once  more 
the  scenes  of  former  prosperity  and  happiness.  Landing  at 
Deal,  she  travelled  all  night,  and  arrived  in  London  in  the 
grey  light  of  morning,  while  yet  the  vast  metropolis  was 
wrapped  in  profound  stillness,  presenting  all  the  appearance  of 
a  great  city  of  the  dead.  But  the  sombre  and  grave-like  aspect 
of  the  town  harmonized  with  the  feelings  of  her  lone  and  sad- 
dened heart.  Her  course  from  the  place  where  she  alighted 
brought  her  in  view  of  endeared  and  sacred  spots — the  pleasant 
home  which  had  been  the  scene  of  so  many  years  of  domestic 
happiness — the  hallowed  sanctuary,  within  whose  walls  she 
had  first  heard  the  gospel  of  Christ,  and  beneath  whose  shadow 
reposed  the  beloved  remains  of  the  husband  of  her  youth. 
"Overpowered  by  my  feelings,"  she  writes,  "I  allowed  but  a 
glance  at  scenes  so  painfully  dear,  and  was  soon  welcomed  by 
the  afiectionate  greetings  of  my  children.  Blessed  be  God, 
the  God  of  all  my  comforts,  for  His  goodness  and  mercy  to  the 
most  unworthy  of  all  His  creatures.  Assist  me  to  bless  and 
praise  His  Holy  name."  Soothed  by  social  intercourse  with 
the  family  of  her  eldest  son,  whose  generous  and  afiectionate 
consideration  left  nothing  to  desire  that  could  contribute  to  her 
comfort,  and  renovated  in  health  by  travel  through  diff'erent 
parts  of  England  and  Scotland,  after  above  four  montlis' 
pleasant  sojourn  she  recrossed  the  Atlantic,  and  arrived  at 
New  York  under  happier  and  brighter  auspices  than  those 
with  which  she  first  landed  a  saddened  stranger  upon  its  shores. 
[80] 


RETURN   TO   AMERICA.  81 

On  her  return  to  the  United  States  she  retired  to  a  small 
estate,  wOiich  she  rented,  on  the  banks  of  the  majestic  Hudson. 
Here,  favoured  with  an  evangelical  ministry,  and  in  the  enjoy- 
ment of  the  communion  of  saints,  she  spent  four  years  of  con- 
genial repose,  revelling  amidst  the  rich  beauties  of  nature,  for 
which  sJie  possessed  so  exquisite  a  taste,  and  indulging  in 
those  rural  pursuits  in  which  she  always  took  particular  de- 
liglit.  Of  the  many  interesting  letters  dated  from  this  roman- 
tic spot,  we  can  afford  space  but  for  one,  as  indicating  the 
supremo  ascendancy  which  spiritual  concerns  still  maintained 
in  her  heart ;  and  as  containing  '  pleasant  words '  for  those 
who  are  sincerely  and  honestly  inquiring  for  the  truth  as  it  is 
in  Jesus. 

"  My  dearest  Mamma, —  Mount  Pleasant,  1823. 

"...  Glad  was  I  to  get  dear 's  letter  ;  and 

though  I  grieve  he  is  not  rejoicing  in  the  Lord,  I  am  far  from 
being  discouraged.  He  has  life.  A  dead  sinner  never  feels 
that  he  is  ungrateful  to  the  best  of  Beings,  that  he  is  in  the 
*  gall  of  bitterness,'  or  is  afraid  of  being  a  hypocrite.  The 
Lord  himself  has  commenced  the  work  in  his  soul,  and  He  will 
carry  it  on ;  not,  perhaps,  in  our  way,  but  in  His  own  w^isdom, 
until  He  accomplishes  the  thing  He  has  put  His  hand  to.  I 
would  rather  see  him  diving  to  the  bottom  of  truth,  for  the 
truth,  than  to  take  it  up,  as  many  do,  on  the  ipse  dixit  of  their 
fellow-men ;  and  fancy  they  beheve  the  gospel  because  others 
do  whose  opinions  they  respect,  and  in  consequence  of  which 
they  are  harassed  with  doubts  and  misgivings,  and  their  use- 
fulness impaired,  all  their  journey  through.     If  our  gracious 

Lord  designs  that should  be  called  to  labour  in  the  dear 

Redeemer's  kingdom  (a  real,  not  a  featlier-hed  soldier).  He  will 
bring  him  to  plough  deep  for  the  truth,  and  perhaps  bring  him 
through  painful  exercises  too.  Blessed  be  His  adored  name, 
for  the  hope  he  causes  my  heart  to  feel  on  this  subject.  I 
have  had  to  pray,  '  Anything,  or  any  way,  dearest  Lord,  so 
that  thou  wilt  convert  his  soul  and  bring  him  into  thy  blessed 
service.'  Thomas  thought  it  was  all  imagination  as  it  respected 
the  resurrection  of  Jesus,  although  his  brethren  declared  they 
had  seen  Him,  till  compelled  by  a  view  of  Christ  himself  to 
exclaim.  My  Lord  and  my  God  !  Paul,  too,  hated  the  name 
of  Jesus,  and  thought  it  a  made  up  story  to  deceive,  until  Jesus 
met  him  in  the  way.  And  I  have  often  remarked  that  some 
4* 


82  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

of  the  most  eminently  useful  ministers  of  the  cross  have  been 
extricated,  by  the  all-powerful  arm  of  the  Redeemer,  from  the 
very  hotbed  of  unbelief  I  do  not  expect  that  this  work  in 
his  soul  will  be  done  in  a  few  days,  or  weeks,  or  perhaps 
years ;  but  that  it  will  be  done,  I  have  little  doubt,  and  bless 
the  Lord  for  his  abundant  goodness  to  him  and  to  me.  If  you 
see  Mr.  ,  inquire  how  the  revival  at  New  Haven  pro- 
ceeds, and  how  Mr.  Bethune's  son  holds  out." 

The  return  of  Mrs.  Winslow  to  America,  and  her  removal 
from  the  banks  of  the  Hudson  to  a  permanent  residence  in 
New  York,  formed  one  of  the  most  interesting  epochs  in  the 
history  of  her  sojourn  in  that  land.  We  refer  to  an  especial 
and  remarkable  season  of  Divine  grace  with  which  God  vis- 
ited her  domestic  circle,  imparting  a  quickened  impulse  to  her 
own  spiritual  feelings,  and  resulting  in  the  accession  of  three 
of  her  children  to  the  ranks  and  service  of  Christ.  The  exist- 
ence of  that  striking  peculiarity  in  the  history  of  the  transat- 
lantic churches, — Religious  Revival, — is  now  a  fact  generally 
well  known.  There  are  few  intelligent  Christians  of  any 
clime,  who  have  not  heard,  and,  perhaps,  it  might  be  added,  to 
whom  in  some  degree  the  influence  has  not  extended,  of  those 
especial  and  remarkable  baptisms  of  the  Spirit  with  which  the 
Great  Head  of  the  church  from  time  to  time  visits  the 
churches  in  America.  It  comes  not  within  the  scope  of  the 
present  volume  to  explain  the  theory  of  this  wonderful  phe- 
nomenon ;  all  that  we  can  allow  ourselves  to  do  is  to  bear  a 
lowly  testimony  to  the  fact  of  its  existence.  The  ecclesiastical 
historian,  as  he  traces  at  some  future  period — w^hen  their  na- 
ture is  better  understood,  and  their  influence  better  known — 
the  origin,  progress,  and  results  of  these  extraordinary  seasons 
of  religious  excitement,  will  probably  date  their  commence- 
ment from  the  first  settlement  of  the  Pilgrim  Fathers  on  those 
western  shores.  It  was  not,  therefore,  remarkable,  that  New 
England  should  have  been  the  birthplace  and  the  cradle  of  the 
first  religious  awakening  on  that  vast  continent.  The  most 
remarkable  displays  of  Divine  power,  however,  appeared  in 
the  times  and  under  the  awakening  ministry  of  the  elder  Ed- 
wards— a  man  of  colossal  intellect,  of  seraphic  piety,  and  of 
childlike  simplicity.  Prom  that  period,  embracing  the  labours 
of  Whitfield,  the  Tennants,  Davies,  Brainard,  and  other  emi- 
nent and  holy  divines,  to  the  present  time,  America  has  been 
the  theatre  of  some  of  the  most  signal  displays  of  the  presence 


THE   mothers'   meeting. — HAPPY   RESULTS.  83 

and  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost  the  church  of  God  has  ever 
witnessed.  We  pause  not  to  ask  why  it  should  be  so.  This 
would  lead  us  into  too  wide  a  range  of  inquiry — but  so  it  is. 
"We  may,  however,  venture  upon  the  remark,  that  the  social 
principle  in  America — though  this  may  not  elucidate  the  origin 
of  these  sovereign  manifestations  of  Divine  grace — has  been 
found  peculiarly  favourable  to  the  promotion  of  religious  revi- 
vals. Commencing  with  an  individual,  the  sacred  influence 
has  extended  to  a  family,  from  thence  to  an  entire  congrega- 
tion; the  impulse  thus  given  to  religious  feeling  has  widened 
until  a  village,  a  town,  and  even  a  city,  has  been  moved  to  its 
centre  on  the  stupendous  concerns  of  eternity.  Such  have 
often  been  the  progress  and  the  happy  results  of  American 
revivals.  We  turn  our  attention  now  to  an  illustration  of 
these  interesting  phenomena,  more  circumscribed,  but  not  less 
marked. 

The  domestic  revival  to  which  the  following  extracts  refer 
was  preceded  by  the  devotional  meetings  of  an  association  of 
Christian  mothers,  representing  diflferent  branches  of  the  church 
of  Christ,  who  convened  weekly  for  the  purpose  of  especial  and 
united  prayer  for  the  Divine  blessing  upon  their  families.  Mrs. 
Winslow  has  often  described  those  seasons  as  hallowed  by  an 
extraordinary  degree  of  the  presence  and  anointing  of  the  Holy 
Ghost.  Frequently  has  she  been  seen  to  return  from  them 
with  tearful  eyes  and  a  glowing  countenance,  to  diffuse  around 
her  home-circle  the  influence  of  her  own  solemn  and  heavenly 
communings.  The  wrestling  intercessions  of  this  band  of  holy 
women,  of  praying  mothers — mighty  in  their  weakness — soon 
brought  the  blessing  for  which  they  pleaded.  Over  one  fam- 
ily, especially,  the  mercy-cloud  gathered,  unveiling  its  heaven- 
sent treasure.  Commencing  with  herself,  the  blessing  ex- 
tended to  one  and  another,  and  yet  another  of  her  circle,  until 
there  was  not  a  room  in  her  dwelling  that  resounded  not  with 
the  voice  of  prayer  and  praise.  In  the  following  extracts  from 
her  family  correspondence,  written  from  New  York,  and  at 
diflferent  intervals  in  the  progress  of  the  revival,  she  thus  nar- 
rates this  good  and  wondrous  work : — 

"In  the  commencement  of  this  year,  before  a  revival  even 
was  thought  of,  the  Lord  met  with  my  soul,  after  some  months 
of  comparative  darkness  and  desertion,  during  which  time  I 
felt  like  wrestling  Israel ;  for  my  spirit  was  in  heaviness,  and 
I  earnestly  sought  and  felt  after  my  absent  Lord.     At  last  He 


■84  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

appeared,  and  filled  my  heart  with  unspeakable  joj.  Like 
Mary,  I  arose  from  the  sepulchre,  and  hastened  to  tell  the  dis- 
ciples that  the  Lord  had  risen  upon  me  as  the  Sun  of  Righteous- 
ness. My  heart  was  enlarged,  and  my  mouth  was  open  to 
speak  good  of  His  holy  name ;  not  only  in  my  own  family,  but 
to  others,  exhorting  them  to  ask  and  to  expect  great  things, 
for  the  Lord  was  at  hand.  I  entreated  them  to  arise  out  of 
the  spiritual  lethargy  they  appeared  to  be  in,  and  Jesus  would 

bless  them  as  He  had  blessed  me." 

*  *  *  % 

"In  what  language  can  I  express  my  gratitude  to  God  for 
all  His  abundant  o-oodness  to  me  and  mine  ?     I  am  at  a  loss. 

o 

My  cup,  at  times,  overflows.  Praise  Him  on  my  behalf,  my 
dear  children,  who  know  the  value  of  this  great  salvation. 
My  children  here  are  walking  in  the  narrow  road,  and  are 
sweetly  united  in  the  tenderest  bonds  of  Christian  love.  Not 
one  unconverted  soul  is  under  my  roof     All,  all  love  the 

Saviour.     My  house  is  a  house  of  prayer." 

*  *  *  * 

"  The  good  work  is  still  progressing.  During  this  revival 
my  soul  has  felt  its  refreshing  influence,  and  still  continues  to 
experience  a  most  precious  unfolding  of  Christ's  love.  For 
many  years  I  have  not  felt  anything  like  it.  I  see  a  fulness 
in  Jesus  I  hardly  ever  saw  before.  Bless  the  Lord,  0  my 
soul !  Several  churches  have  partaken  of  this  heavenly  shower, 
and  I  trust  it  will  increase  more  and  more.  Many  who  love 
the  Lord  are  upon  their  watch-tower  looking  out  for  His  ap- 
proach. Oh,  it  is  a  refreshing  season  !  My  own  soul  can 
testify  that  Jesus  is  among  us  of  a  truth.  It  seems  as  if  new 
strength  had  been  imparted  to  gird  up  the  loins  of  my  mind, 
and  to  set  out  afresh  to  run  the  heavenly  race.     I  can  look 

back  and  see  with  concern  how  I  have  loitered  on  my  way." 

*  *  4t  * 

"  This  precious  revival  is  still  advancing.  The  Lord  is 
pouring  out  His  Spirit  in  a  way  I  never  before  saw  or  felt. 
And  what  I  now  see  and  feel  has  tended  to  confirm  my  soul 
more  than  ever  in  the  reality  of  the  religion  of  Jesus,  and  of 
that  eternal  world  to  which  we  are  fast  approaching.  There 
is  nothing  like  enthusiasm.  I  am  quite  inadequate  to  give  you 
any  just  idea  of  this  most  solemn  and  gracious  work  of  God. 
It  is  to  me  something  like  the  day  of  Pentecost." 

*  *  *^  * 


DOMESTIC   REVIVAL.  85 

"  Everything  under  my  roof  seems  to  wear  another  aspect. 
Old  things  have  passed  away,  and  all  things  have  become  new. 
I  can  say  of  my  children,  '  Behold,  Lord,  they  pray  ! '  The 
things  of  God  open  upon  them  with  deep  interest.  The  ways 
of  wisdom  are  pleasant,  and  everything  not  connected  there- 
with, tasteless.  Oh,  what  has  God,  my  God,  wrought  for  His 
unworthy  handmaid !  Had  He  given  me  an  earthly  crown  it 
had  been  dross  in  comparison.  It  appears  to  me  that  the  Lord 
is  about  to  do  great  things  for  our  wricked  world.  He  will 
pour  out  His  Spirit  upon  all  flesh,  as  He  has  promised.  Oh, 
that  you  may  feel  that  he  is  drawing  nigh  in  your  part  of  the 
world  !  Ask,  and  expect  great  things  from  Him.  You  can- 
not ask  too  much  when  you  ask  in  Jesus'  name,  and  God  can- 
not give  too  much  when  He  gives  for  Jesus'  sake.  How  near 
He  has  been  to  us  !  You  will  hardly  think  I  can  speak  too 
much  on  this  interesting  subject,  when  it  is  said,  the  angels  in 
heaven  rejoice  over  one  sinner  that  repenteth.  And  here  are 
three  to  whom  Jesus  has  given  repentance  and  life  under  my 
roof.     If  the  angels  rejoice  in  heaven,  well  may  I  rejoice  on 

earth," 

*  *  *  * 

"  And  now  my  heart  is  going  out  after  you  all.  The  Lord's 
arm  of  grace  is  not  shortened  but  that  it  can  extend  across  the 
Atlantic.  Who  can  tell  but  at  this  moment  it  has  commenced 
among  you  all  ?  I  must  pray  on.  Elisha  was  wroth  against 
the  king  of  Israel  because  he  smote  on  the  ground  thrice,  and 
stayed ;  declaring  that  if  he  had  smitten  five  or  six  times,  his 
enemies  should  have  fallen  before  him.  May  I  be  enabled  to 
carry  my  unconverted  children  in  the  arms  of  faith  to  Jesus, 
until  He  put  His  hand  upon  them  and  bless  them.  The  re- 
vival is  still  going  on,  not  only  here  (New  York),  but  also  in 
every  part  of  America.  In  Philadelphia,  and  in  many  other 
places,  numbers,  I  am  told,  are  inquiring  their  way  to  Zion. 
It  appears  almost  like  the  millennial  day.  Unitarianism,  like 
a  pernicious  weed,  is  spreading  in  Boston;  but  lately  they 
have  had  a  more  extensive  revival  than  we  have  had  here. 
This  has  been  a  year  of  wonders  ;  thousands  have  been  born 
into  the  kingdom  of  our  Lord  and  Saviour,  Jesus  Christ. 
These  are  glorious  manifestations  that  Jesus  lives,  and  is  ac- 
complishing all  His  gracious  purposes,  and  will  bring  His 
people  into  a  wealthy  place  at  last.  How  has  my  faith  been 
strengthened,  and  my  soul  established  in  the  truth,  from  what 


86  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY  WINSLOW. 

I  have  seen  of  His  power  and  grace  beneath  my  own  roof, 
and  from  what  I  have  experienced  in  my  own  soul !  Oh,  may 
He  extend  His  arm  of  mercy  to  you  all ! '  I  do  look  for  it, 
and  am  ready  to  say,  '  I  cannot  let  Thee  go  until  Thou  bless 
me  in  the  conversion  of  all,  alV  As  it  respects  myself,  my  joy 
is  settled  down  into  a  stable  peace,  and  increasing  confidence 
in  the  dear  Redeemer.  I  feel  a  throne  of  grace  very  precious, 
and  the  name  of  the  Lord  a  tower  of  strength.  It  appears  to 
me  that  I  was  to  have  travail  of  soul  for  these  children,  and  a 
deeper  work  in  my  own.  I  am  still  utter  weakness  in  myself, 
but  am  enabled  to  keep  a  more  steadfast  eye  upon  Jesus." 

Such  is  the  prevailing  power  with  God  of  a  praying  and 
believing  mother.  Let  the  Christian  parent,  anxious  and 
earnest  for  the  spiritual  and  eternal  wellbeing  of  her  children, 
take  encouragement  from  the  preceding  narrative,  and  give 
herself  to  prayer  for  the  outpouring  of  the  Spirit  upon  her 
family.  Taking  hold  of  His  word,  let  her  remind  God  of  His 
promise, — "  I  will  pour  my  Spirit  upon  thy  seed,  and  my  bless- 
ing upon  thine  offspring ; "  and  thus  travailing  in  birth  a 
second  time  in  the  energy  of  faith,  and  in  the  wrestling  of 
prayer,  it  will  be  the  joy  of  her  heart  to  behold  Christ  formed 
within  them  the  hope  of  glory. 

And  why  are  not  Revivals  of  religion  more  frequent  in  this 
land  ?  Why  have  we  not  those  special  baptisms  of  the  Spirit, 
for  which  the  churches  in  America  are  so  distinguished  ?  That 
we  are  not  entirely  without  manifest  tokens  of  the  Spirit's 
presence,  we  thankfully  acknowledge.  In  the  absence  of  the 
showers^  we  have  the  continual  dew  of  the  Spirit.  But  are  we 
not  justified  in  expecting  more  than  this — even  the  Gut2Muri?ig 
of  the  Spirit  ?  Is  not  the  Spirit  the  property  of  the  universal 
church  ?  Is  not  the  present  emphatically  the  dispensation  of 
the  Spirit  ?  Have  we  not  the  prediction  and  the  promise  of 
His  large  bestowment  in  these  last  days  ?  And  is  not  Christ 
enthroned  in  heaven,  having  received  the  promise  of  the 
Father,  prepared  to  rain  down  righteousness  upon  His  church  ? 
Why,  then,  have  we  not  the  blessing  ?  Some  observations  of 
Mrs.  Winslow,  on  the  power  of  prayer  and  faith,  gleaned  from 
"Thoughts"  recorded  in  her  Journal,  may  probably  supply  an 
answer : — 

"  0  Lord,  revive  us  in  the  midst  of  the  years !  How  is  it 
that  we  have  no  precious  revivals  here,  and  that  the  all-impor- 
tant subject  lies  with  so  little  weight  upon  our  hearts  ?     It  is 


THOUGHTS  ON  THE  POWER  OF  PRAYER.      87 

because  we  do  not  believe  the  matter-of-fact,  altliougli  God  has 
promised,  and  declared  the  truth.  When  Christ  had  risen, 
and  some  were  eye-witnesses  of  the  fact,  yet  when  they  de- 
clared the  blessed  truth  to  the  rest,  they  were  as  those  that 
mocked.  We  testify  that  these  things  are  so,  for  we  have 
seen  and  felt  them  ourselves.  Our  hearts  have  burned  within 
us,  and  our  souls  have  been  refreshed  as  with  new  wine  from 
the  kingdom.  The  doors  have  been  shut  about  us,  and  Jesus 
has  been  in  our  midst  within,  blessing,  reviving,  and  refresh- 
ing us— giving  life  to  the  dead,  and  speaking  comforting  words 
to  His  saints.  It  has  been  the  mighty  work  of  an  Almighty 
God,  manifesting  His  power,  and  displaying  His  love. 

"  Oh,  the  mighty  power  of  prayer  !  Even  the  best  of  Chris- 
tians know  but  little  what  it  really  is.  The  apostle  felt  the 
truth,  when  he  exhorted  the  saints  to  pray  toithout  ceasing. 
Christian,  are  you  in  trouble? — call  upon  the  name  of  the 
Lord,  and  He  will  deliver.  This  poor  man  cried^  and  the  Lord 
heard  him^  and  saved  him  out  of  all  his  troubles.  His  ear  is 
ever  open  to  the  cry  of  His  people,  and  His  arm  outstretched 
on  their  behalf.  His  aim  is  ever  to  make  you  happy  in  Him- 
self, and  happy  throughout  eternity.  Make  Him  your  con- 
fidant ;  entrust  Him  with  all  your  secrets.  Let  Christ  be  your 
friend,  and  you  need  no  other.  All  hearts  are  at  his  disposal ; 
and  if  a  man's  ways  please  the  Lord  He  maketh  even  his  enemies 
to  be  at  peace  with  him.  Are  you  poor  and  needy  ?  Go  to 
Christ  for  all  you  need.  Satan  may  suggest  that  these  are 
carnal  things.  But  did  not  the  Lord  send  His  servant  to  the 
widow,  to  be  fed  for  many  days?  and  did  the  barrel  of  meal 
waste,  or  the  cruse  of  oil  fail  ?  Did  He  not  send  a  celestial 
messenger  to  prepare  Elijah's  breakfast  while  he  slept  ?  And 
is  He  not  the  same  now?  Go,  then,  to  Christ  for  all  you 
need. 

"  Faith  is  the  gift  of  God,  and  it  is  a  working  agent  in  the 
soul  of  the  believer.  It  has  to  do  with  God,  and  with  Him 
only.  It  takes  hold  of  His  faithfulness,  who  cannot  deny  Him- 
self. Simple  faith  honours  God,  and  God  honours  simple  faith. 
True  faith  works  in  the  dark  as  in  the  light.  It  cannot  fail, 
but  will  always  come  off  triumphant.  And  what  is  faith? 
It  is  simply  believing  what  God  has  said — taking  Him  at  His 
word.  Faith  tries  God,  and  God  tries  the  faith  He  gives. 
Little  faith  brings  home  but  little.  Be  it  unto  you  according  to 
your  faith.     Seek  much  for  this  Divine  grace.     It  is  for  you 


88  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW. 

treasured  up  in  Christ.  Look  not  for  it  in  yourself.  It  grows 
in  its  native  soil.  It  is  in  Christ  Jesus'  rich  treasure-house. 
It  is  of  heavenly  origin,  and  leads  the  soul  to  the  source  from 
whence  it  came.  Only  believe.  Trust  Him,  ye  tried  and 
empty  saints,  and  you  shall  rejoice  in  the  goodness  and  tender 
mercies  of  your  faithful  and  unchanging  God.  I  may  also  re- 
mark, that  nothing  tests  or  strengthens  faith  so  much  as  the 
trying  dispensations  of  God  towards  His  peopk.  The  furnace 
destroys  everything  but  the  pure  gold.  Nothing  but  real 
faith  can  endure  the  heat  of  the  fiery  crucible,  and,  what  is 
strange,  it  grows  in  the  fire." 

CoupUng,  then,  these  cognate  graces, — prayer  and  faith, — 
let  the  churches  of  Christ  prove  God  now  herewith,  if  He  will 
not  open  the  windows  of  Heaven,  and  pour  out  a  blessing,  that 
there  shall  not  be  room  enough  to  receive  it. 

The  following  touching  reminiscences,  from  her  own  pen,  of 
a  period  in  her  history,  thus  rapidly  traversed,  may  form  a 
befitting  close  to  this  chapter  of  the  work.  As  a  personal 
communication,  and  unveiling  thoughts  and  feelings  most 
sacred  to  a  mother's  heart,  some  hesitation  has  been  felt  in  in- 
troducing it ;  but  the  conviction  that  it  beautifully  illustrates 
her  character  as  a  Christian  parent,  while  it  bears  a  noble 
testimony  to  the  faithfulness  of  a  pray er-h earing  God,  has 
pleaded  against  private  feelings.  It  is  addressed  to  one  of  her 
sons  : — 

"  Before  I  rose  this  morning,  I  was  led  to  take  a  review  of 
the  Lord's  dealings  with  you  and  me.  I  could  not  but  see  and 
feel  that  you  have  been  a  child  of  many  prayers,  and  that  God 
has  turned  a  listening  ear  to  the  voice  of  my  supplications  for 
you.  A  few  months  before  your  birth,  the  Lord  met  with  my 
soul,  and  most  blessedly  drew  me  to  Himself,  making  Himself 
known  to  me  as  my  Saviour  and  my  God.  I  bore  you  during 
this  sweet  season  of  my  espousal  to  Christ.  It  was  the  time 
of  my  ^  first  love.'  The  first  spark  of  divine  life  I  then  received. 
After  your  birth,  I  was  brought  to  the  verge  of  eternity ;  for 
nearly  twenty-four  hours  there  was  hardly  a  hair's-breadth  be- 
tween me  and  death.  The  physicians  concealed  my  danger  ; 
but  God  did  for  me  what  no  human  skill  could  do,  and  I  was 
spared, — snatched  as  from  the  grave.  When  you  were  about 
five  years  old,  I  took  you  into  the  country  for  your  liealth  ; 
and  there,  through  the  mistake  of  the  nurse,  who  brouglit  me 
a  wrong  medicine,  I  administered  to  you  a  powder,  'sufficient,' 


TOUCHING   REMINISCENCES.  89 

the  doctors  said,  '  to  have  killed  ten  men.'  At  the  moment  of 
the  dreadful  discovery,  these  words  of  a  beautiful  hymn  were 
brought  to  my  mind — 

'  In  all  thy  troubles  sharp  and  strong, 
My  soul,  to  Jesus  fly.' 

I  did  so.  He  heard  my  prayer.  The  physicians  said  that  you 
must  die.  The  Lord  said,  '  He  shall  not  die,  but  live.'  He 
answered  prayer,  and  gave  you  back  to  me.  They  afterwards 
said  it  was  a  miracle.  During  the  time  of  that  gracious  revival, 
how  did  I  pray  that  He  would  meet  with  your  soul.  He  did 
so.  He  knows,  and  He  only,  how  I  wrestled  for  your  full 
conversion.  I  wanted  a  clear  proof  of  a  new  birth  in  Christ. 
He  answered  my  prayer,  and  gave  you  once  more  to  me  as 
from  the  dead, — a  hving  child,  born  again  of  the  Spirit.  .  .  . 
Oh,  it  is  good  to  look  back,  and  trace  His  dealings  and  His 
wondrous  works  to  the  children  of  men !  Taking  thus  a  re- 
view of  these  gracious  things,  under  the  teaching  of  the  Eter- 
nal Spirit,  so  far  from  being  puffed  up,  they  will  lay  us  low  in 
the  dust  under  a  sense  of  our  base  ingratitude  towards  Him, 
and  the  wretched  returns  we  have  made  for  such  distinguish- 
ing mercies.  Oh,  that  He  might  keep  you  humble,  and  give 
you  such  views  of  your  own  heart  as  will  cause  you  to  feel  as 
well  as  confess,  that  you  are  less  than  the  least  of  all  saints. 
This  is  my  prayer  for  you,  and  myself  too.  A  mother's 
prayers  have  been  your  swaddhng-clothes  from  your  birth. 
Do  you  pray  for  me  ?     I  am  sure  you  do." 


CHAPTER  VI. 

In  1828,  a  few  months  following  the  interesting  events  re- 
corded in  the  preceding  chapter,  again  prostrated  in  strength 
by  the  excessive  heat  of  an  almost  tropical  climate,  and,  per- 
haps, scarcely  less  so  by  the  extreme  mental  excitement 
through  which  she  had  just  passed,  she  found  it  necessary  to 
make  a  second  voyage  to  England,  for  the  purpose  of  recruit- 
ing her  health.  In  contemplating  this  step,  she  thus  writes  to 
her  family : — 

"  I  am  not  quite  certain  but  that,  with  God's  blessing,  you 
may  see  me  in  the  autumn.  If  I  come,  you  must  be  prepared 
to  find  me  much  altered  in  appearance.  I  suppose  you  will 
hardly  know  your  weather-beaten  mother.  But  I  think  the 
change  of  climate  would  soon  recruit  my  health,  with  the 
Lord's  blessing.  But  I  am  growing  old,  and  nothing  can  re- 
pair the  ravages  of  years,  I  do  earnestly  pray,  if  the  Lord  do 
not  go  with  me.  He  will  not  suffer  me  to  go  hence.  I  long  to 
see  all  my  children,  but  I  desire  to  wait  patiently  the  Lord's 
time.  My  times  are  in  His  hands.  Oh,  that  He  may  direct 
my  steps  !" 

After  a  perilous  passage,  but  marked  by  especial  mercy,  she 
arrived  at  Liverpool  in  safety ;  spent  a  few  months  with  her 
eldest  son  in  the  country,  and  thence  took  up  her  residence  in 
London.  Anxious  for  the  holy  walk,  and  growth  in  the  divine 
life,  of  those  of  her  family  she  had  left  in  America,  she  had 
scarcely  touched  the  shores  of  England  when  she  addressed  to 
them  the  following  earnest  epistle.  We  have  no  heart  to 
abridge  a  document  so  strikingly  illustrative  of  the  spirituality 
of  her  mind  and  the  practical  character  of  her  Christianity,  and 
so  replete  with  useful  sentiments  : — 

"  My  dearest  Children, —  July,  1828. 

"  ,  .  .  .  And  now  that  I  have  given  you  an  account 
of  the  goodness  of  God  in  bringing  me  throus:h  so  many  dan- 
[90] 


EARNEST   LETTER   TO    HER    CHILDREN.  91 

gers,  and  in  the  midst  of  my  dear  family  on  this  side  of  the 
water,  let  me  turn  to  your  best  interests.  I  have  left  you,  my 
beloved  children,  (still  more  beloved,  because  you  belong  to 
Christ,)  in  the  place  of  your  spiritual  birth.  /  have  left  you, 
but  God  is  with  you.  Keep  close  to  Jesus.  Forget  not  my 
old  exhortation,  Pray  without  ceasing.  Go  to  Him  for  all  you 
need  ;  lean  upon  Him.  There  is  a  fulness  in  Christ,  treasured 
up  for  you,  that  the  highest  angel  in  heaven  cannot  fathom. 
Tell  Him  all  that  is  in  your  heart.  Lay  your  case  before  Him 
as  if  He  did  not  already  know  it.  This  is  the  sweet  simplicity 
of  faith  that  Christ  loves.  You  cannot  come  too  often.  Bring 
to  Him  your  little  cares  as  well  as  your  great  ones.  If  any- 
thing is  a  trouble  to  you,  however  small  it  may  be,  you  are 
warranted,  nay,  commanded,  to  take  it  to  Him,  and  thereby 
you  glorify  His  name.  /  will  also  leave  in  the  midst  of  thee  an 
affiicted  and  poor  people^  and  they  shall  trust  in  the  name  of  the 
Lord.  Pray  much  for  a  tender  conscience,  a  conscience  sus- 
ceptible of  the  least  sin, — as  susceptible  as  the  eye  to  the  touch ; 
and  never  rest  if  you  feel  guilt  there,  however  small,  until  it  is 
removed  by  a  fresh  application  of  the  precious  blood  of  Christ. 
If  we  confess  our  sins,  He  is  faithful  and  Just  to  forgive  us  our 
sins,  and  to  cleanse  us  from  all  unrighteousness.  Wherever  you 
are,  at  home  or  by  the  wayside,  lift  up  your  heart  to  that  pre- 
cious Saviour  who  has  manifested  so  much  love  to  your  souls. 
Never  be  afraid  to  come  to  Him.  Satan  will  tempt  you  here ; 
but  beware  of  his  suggestions.  He  would  keep  you  from 
Christ ;  but  Christ  is  as  needful  for  you,  every  step  you 
take  to  glory,  as  when  you  were  overwhelmed  with  sorrow, 
under  a  sense  of  your  awful  state  as  a  sinner  before  God. 
Never  look  within  for  comfort ;  you  will  find  nothing  there 
but  what  is  calculated  to  humble  you.  But  look  to  Jesus. 
There  is  everything  in  Him  to  encourage  you  in  your  warfare. 
And  yet  it  is  needful  that  you  examine  your  own  hearts  from 
day  to  day,  that  you  may  be  well  acquainted  with  all  your 
spiritual  diseases,  and  forget  not  that  Christ  is  your  Physician. 
He  has  undertaken  for  your  cure,  and  to  fit  you,  by  the  in- 
dwelling of  His  Spirit,  for  the  inheritance  He  has  prepared  for 
you.  Oh,  live  upon  Him  out  of  yourselves.  You  need  fear 
nothing  but  sin,  nor  even  that  with  a  slavish  fear,  but  with  a 
godly,  filial  fear.  Avoid  trifling,  lukewarm  professors.  They 
are  the  bane  of  the  church  of  Christ.  If  you  can  do  them  no 
good,  they  will  do  you  much  harm.  One  thing  I  would  espe- 
3* 


92  MEMOIR   OF   MRS,    MARY   WINSLOW. 

cially  remind  you  of;  in  all  your  difficulties  and  trials,  (for 
many  you  will  have,)  go  not  first  to  an  arm  of  flesh,  nor  sit 
and  ponder  what  you  shall  do ;  but  go  directly  to  your  dear 
Saviour,  and  ask  earnestly  for  wisdom  and  grace  to  guide  you 
through  them  ;  watch  the  leadings  and  openings  of  His  gra- 
cious providence,  and  follow  on  as  He  leads  the  way,  and  He 
will  make  even  these  things  to  work  for  your  good.  If  you 
feel  your  want  of  faith,  ask  this  of  Him,  that  you  may  come  in 
faith ;  for  this  is  as  much  His  gift,  as  the  blessing  you  want. 
Your  wives  are  professors  of  the  same  blessed  hope. 
But,  the  husband  is  the  head  of  the  luife^  even  as  Christ  is  the 
head  of  the  church  ;  and  they  will  look  to  you  for  an  example. 
Walk  before  them  circumspectly ;  pray  with  them,  and  pray 
for  them,  and  allow  nothing  to  interrupt  family  worship.  May 
God  give  you  wisdom  in  all  things.  I  thought,  when  you 
were  brought  to  the  knowledge  of  the  truth,  my  care  for  you 
would  be  over;  but  I  feel  as  anxious  now  that  you  should  walk 
worthy  of  His  blessed  name,  as  I  was  before  that  your  souls 
might  be  saved.  Remember  that  your  strength  is  perfect 
weakness,  and  yet  with  Christ's  strength  you  can  do  all  things. 
Again,  I  repeat,  live  upon  Him.  Aim  to  glorify  Him  in  all 
things,  and  to  possess  an  abiding  sense  of  the  indwelling  of  the 
Holy  Spirit,  that  your  thoughts,  desires,  and  affections  may 
soar  to  heavenly  and  eternal  objects.  If  you  lose  this,  you 
cannot  walk  comfortably.  Cast  your  cares,  as  they  arise,  upon 
Him  who  careth  for  you.  Do  not  covet  riches  :  pray  against 
this  more  or  less  easily  besetting  sin  of  many  of  God's  people. 
Forget  not  the  exhortation.  Be  content  with  such  things  as  ye 
have.  Keep  close  to  Jesus ;  for  if  you  walk  at  a  distance,  you 
have  need  to  fear  the  rod :  nevertheless.  His  loving-kindness 
He  will  not  take  from  you.  He  loves  while  He  chastens.  A 
few  more  years,  and  we  shall  have  done  with  all  things  here 
below,  and  eternity,  with  all  its  glorious  realities,  will  burst 
upon  your  view.  Oh,  then,  live  for  eternity.  Think  much  of 
your  blessed  inheritance  there,  and  let  the  glory  of  God  be 
dearer  to  you  than  your  own  lives.  Follow  on  to  know  more 
of  Him.  Be  very  thankful  for  what  he  has  already  done,  but 
press  on  for  more.  Be  not  satisfied  with  a  little,  when  He  has 
such  immense  riches  to  bestow.  0/jeri  thy  mouth  wide,  and  I 
will  fill  it.  Above  all,  before  I  close, — and  do  bear  with  me, 
for  my  heart  is  very  full,  and  you  are  doubly  dear  to  me,  since 
you  belong  to  Christ,  my  beloved  children — never,  never  omit 


EARNEST   LETTER   TO    HER    CHILDREN.  93 

secret  prayer.  I  take  shame  to  myself  that  I  have  not  spoken 
of  this  before.  Remember,  the  first  departures  from  Christ 
begin  at  the  closet,  or  rather  in  the  heart ;  and  then  private 
prayer  is  either  hurried  over,  becomes  a  mere  form,  or  is  en- 
tirely neglected.  My  dear  children,  grieve  not  the  Spirit; 
and  whenever  you  feel  a  desire  to  pray,  that  moment  lift  up 
your  heart  to  Him  who  is  always  near  you.     I  can  truly  say, 

'  Sweet  the  moments,  rich  in  blessing. 
Which  before  the  cross  1  spend. ' 

How  often  do  I  leave  the  family  circle,  when  one  or  the  other 
of  you  is  pressing  on  my  mind — passing,  perhaps,  through 
some  trial,  or  beguiled  by  some  temptation  ;  I  retire  to  my 
room,  close  the  door,  and  fall  upon  my  knees,  plead  for  you 
with  many  tears,  and  commend  you  again  and  again  to  Him 
who  has  promised  to  carry  the  lambs  in  his  arms.  I  wish  to 
caution  you  against  a  great  evil  in  many  churches ;  I  allude  to 
gossiping  professors,  who,  when  they  meet,  instead  of  talking 
of  Christ,  talk  about  almost  everything  else, — '  busy  bodies,' 
who  go  from  house  to  house,  speaking  things  which  they  ought 
not.  Oh,  what  a  dishonour  are  such  to  the  cause  of  the  dear 
Redeemer  !  Rebuke  such  in  gentleness  of  spirit,  and  withdraw 
from  them.  Pray  that  your  own  minds  might  be  duly  solem- 
nized with  the  weight  and  importance  of  eternal  things,  and 
that  your  conversation  might  have  a  savour  of  the  gospel  at 
all  times,  for  your  own  comfort,  and  for  the  edification  of 
others.  As  ye  have  received  Christ  Jesus  the  Lord,  so  walk  ye 
in  Him.  Pray  and  watch  against  a  light  and  trifling  spirit  in 
yourselves,  and  go  nowhere  where  it  is  Hkely  to  be  called  forth. 
Remember  that  God  has  to  do  with  the  heart.  To  this  man 
ivill  I  look,  even  to  him  that  is  poor  and  of  a  contrite  spirit. 
Humility  is  one  of  the  sweetest  graces  of  God's  Spirit.  Ear- 
nestly seek  to  know  as  much  of  your  own  hearts  as  will  keep 
you  sitting  at  the  foot  of  the  cross ;  and  at  the  same  time  to 
know  as  much  of  Christ's  heart  as  will  enable  you  to  rejoice  in 
the  fulness  and  sufficiency  there  is  in  Him.  May  God  keep 
you,  guide  and  instruct  you,  in  every  good  word  and  work, 
and  carry  you  in  His  tender  bosom,  are  my  unceasing  prayers, 
night  and  day." 

It  may  be  proper  that  we  should  now  introduce  the  reader 
to  the  more  private  and  sacred  records  of  her  hidden  life. 
The  journals  from  which  we  ouote  were  visible  to  no   other 


m  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

eye  than  her  own ;  and  were  kept  by  her  but  as  way-marks 
of  her  rehgious  progress,  and  as  memorials  of  God's  gracious 
and  providential  deahngs  in  her  personal  history.  Her  lowly 
spirit  cannot  now  be  wounded  by  their  publication;  while 
their  embodiment  in  this  work  will,  perhaps,  more  than  anything 
else,  illustrate  the  close  transactions  of  her  soul  with  God. 
The  essence  of  real  religion  is  intimacy  with  God.  The  di- 
vine life  in  the  soul  will  ascend  to  the  source  from  whence  it 
came.  And  that  record,  which  reveals  to  us  the  sacred  mys- 
teries of  this  holy  life,  which  throws  a  ray  upon  its  intricacies, 
and  shows  us  how,  like  Enoch  and  Noah,  we  too  may  "  walk 
with  God,"  must  be  of  inestimable  value  to  the  Christian 
church.  In  the  extracts  we  are  about  to  make,  we  trace  the 
experience  of  one  who  dealt  faithfully  with  her  own  soul,  and 
honestly  with  God.  She  set  the  Lord  always  before  her. 
With  an  eye  intent  upon  her  path,  yet  ever  looking  to,  and 
resting  upon  Him,  she  sought  so  to  shape  her  course  as  to 
please  God  in  all  things.  She  lived  as  constantly  "  beholding 
the  Invisible,"  and  felt  that  she  had  alone  to  do  with  Him. 

In  the  course  of  her  diary,  a  name  frequently  occurs,  em- 
balmed in  the  memory  of  many  who  will  read  these  pages. 
It  was  a  kind  Providence  that  gently  led  her  steps,  soon  after 
her  arrival  in  England,  to  the  chapel  of  the  late  Rev.  James 
Harington  Evans.  But  recently  returned  from  the  hallowed 
scenes  her  letters  have  so  glowingly  described,  her  heart  was 
fully  prepared  warmly  to  sympathize  with  a  ministry,  the  pe- 
culiar excellence  and  winning  charm  of  which  was  the  power 
of  the  Holy  Ghost,  with  which  the  Saviour  was  exalted.  On 
the  first  occasion  of  her  appearance  within  this  sanctuary,  the 
Lord  especially  met  with  her  soul, — first  in  the  spiritual,  fer- 
vent prayer,  and  then,  more  manifestly,  through  the  powerful 
message  of  His  truth. 

We  now  introduce  the  reader  to  the  more  private  expe- 
rience of  the  subject  of  this  Memoir,  as  recorded  from  time  to 
time  during  1828  and  1829:— 

"  London,  July  10th,  1828. — Had  nearness  to  God  this 
morning,  and  an  earnest  desire  to  resign  myself,  my  children, 
and  all,  into  His  blessed  hands,  and  to  know  no  will  but  His. 
We  are  reading  regularly  through  the  Bible.  The  12th  of 
Exodus  was  the  chapter  of  the  day.  Oh,  that  I  and  all  my 
household  might  feed  continually  upon  the  precious  Lamb  of 
God  •  and  with  the  bitter  herbs  of  unfeigned  repentance  may 


DIARY.  95 

■we  eat  thereof,  witli  our  loins  girded  about  with  truth,  and 
our  hearts  and  faces  towards  the  heavenly  Canaan  !  Prayed. 
Oh,  for  more  of  the  spirit  of  prayer  !  Lord,  pour  it  down 
upon  us,  for  Jesus'  sake  !  Poor  old  Mrs.  D.  came.  I  must 
obtain  a  pension  for  her  soon,  or  she  will  be  removed,  before 
she  gets  it,  to  a  better  pension  above,*  She  appears  ill,  but 
contented,  though  in  a  workhouse.  God  has,  I  trust,  pre- 
pared her  for  a  home  not  made  with  hands,  eternal  in  the 
heavens.  How  many  such  hidden  ones  has  our  dear  Jesus  in 
this  vale  of  tears !  Although  overlooked  by  the  rich  and 
mighty.  His  eye  sees  them,  His  heart  pities  them,  and  He  is 
meetening  them,  by  all  His  dispensations,  for  the  glorious  in- 
heritance He  has  prepared  for  them  above.  What  a  change, 
from  a  body  of  sin  and  death — from  the  privations  of  a  work- 
house— to  the  heavenly  abode  and  presence  of  Jesus  !" 

"  12th. — Read  this  morning  the  14th  of  Exodus,  detailing 
the  many  trials  of  faith  in  the  history  of  Israel  of  old.  They 
were  commanded  to  '  stand  still,  and  see  the  salvation  of  the 
Lord,'  Hedged  in  on  every  side,  what  could  they  do  but 
stand  still,  until  the  Lord  opened  a  way  for  them  ?  My  way, 
too,  is  hedged  up  just  now.  May  I  be  able  to  trust  in  the 
Lord,  and  never  be  left  to  murmur  or  repine,  but  to  wait  and 
see  the  salvation  of  my  God  !  Lord,  let  me  see  the  pillar  of 
cloud  by  day,  and  the  pillar  of  fire  by  night.  Not  one  step 
can  I  take  without  Thee.  My  soul  is  much  exercised.  Un- 
dertake, O  Lord,  for  thy  widowed  handmaid  1  I  can  truly 
say.  To  whom  can  I  go  but  unto  Thee  ?  I  never  fail  to  find, 
that  trials  drive  me  closer  to  Christ,  and  quicken  me  in  the  ex- 
ercise of  prayer.  Oh,  how  is  it  that  I  do  so  constantly  need 
the  rod?" 

"  13th. — I  awoke  in  the  night,  and  a  care,  something  like  a 
trial  in  prospect,  presented  itself  to  my  mind.  I  could  not 
sleep  until  I  laid  it  before  the  Lord  ;  for,  to  whom  can  I  go 
in  all  my  troubles  and  difficulties,  but  to  Him  who  is  a  Father 
to  the  fatherless,  and  the  widow's  God  ?  Almost  directly 
afterwards  I  fell  asleep.  I  had  unburdened  myself  to  Him 
who  has  all  hearts  in  his  hands ;  and  my  mind  was  at  peace. 
Oh,  what  a  privilege  is  this !  How  remarkably  precious  is  a 
throne  of  grace  to  a  tried,  tempted  Christian  at  all  times  I 
Had  a  sweet  opportunity   this  morning,    and  much  liberty. 

*  This  pension  was  secured. 


96  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW. 

Could  unhesitatingly  say,  '  Abba,  Father !  '  and  lay  before 
Him  all  that  was  in  my  heart,  believing  he  heard  me." 

"  14th. — Intended  to  have  gone  to  Hampstead,  but  the  rain 
prevented.  I  desire  to  acknowledge  the  hand  of  God  even  in 
a  shower  of  rain.  I  was  not  to  go.  Felt  a  wandering  of 
mind  while  engaged  in  prayer  for  a  moment,  and  in  the  whole 
exercise  a  want  of  fervour.  It  was  not  a  heart-searching, 
melting  season,  such  as  I  am  sometimes  favoured  with.  Oh, 
how  good  is  God  to  permit  such  a  one  to  approach  Him  !  " 

"  15th. — The  Lord  orders  aU  things.  I  desire  to  keep  a 
steadfast  eye  upon  Him.  How  much  I  felt  to-day,  my 
prayers  needed  to  be  prayed  over  and  to  be  repented  of. 
What  need  have  we  of  a  merciful  High  Priest,  who  can  be 
touched  with  a  feeling  sense  of  our  infirmities!  Precious 
Jesus !  let  me  feel  my  dependence  upon  Thee  more  and 
more." 

"  20th.  Sabbath. — Illness  has  kept  me  from  the  house  of 
God  to-day.  I  have  felt  very  insensible,  although  I  have  so 
much  cause  for  thankfulness  and  gratitude.  The  Lord  has 
heard  my  prayer,  and  graciously  answered  my  petition,  in 
spite  of  unbelief  and  ingratitude  on  my  part.  He  has  turned 
away  the  evil  I  feared,  and  made  this  hard  thing  easy,  and 
this  crooked  path  straight.  Blessed  be  His  ever-adored  name. 
In  those  things  that  troubled  me,  I  sought  the  Lord.  My 
petitions  were  graciously  answered.  May  I  never  forget  the 
least  of  His  benefits  !  I  am  surrounded  with  innumerable 
blessings.  My  children  round  me,  the  sweet  privilege  of  the 
gospel  at  hand,  when  able  to  attend,  and  no  bodily  pain  of 
any  consequence.     Bless  the  Lord,  0  my  soul !  " 

"23rd. — Had  a  most  comfortable  assurance,  both  last  night 
and  this  morning,  of  my  interest  in  a  crucified,  risen  Saviour, 
and  found  I  could  tell  Him  all  that  was  in  my  heart.  I  am  a 
poor,  wanting  creature  ;  always  coming  for  a  fresh  supply. 
But  oh,  what  cause  for  thankfulness  it  is  an  ever-flowing, 
overflowing  fountain  to  which  I  come !  I  have  much  comfort 
in  commending  my  children,  the  dear  lambs  of  Christ's  flock, 
to  the  especial  care  of  the  dear  Shepherd.  Lord,  keep  them 
as  the  apple  of  Thine  eye ;  and  may  those  who  are  waiting 
for,  and  expecting  their  halting,  be  ashamed  and  confounded 
when  they  see  that  Christ  is  in  them  of  a  truth." 

"  26th. — Awoke  with    distressing   thoughts  of  .     As 

soon  as  I  was  up,  I  dropped  upon  my  knees  before  the  Lord ; 


DIARY.  97 

and  without  preparing  my  mind  for  prayer,  as  some  are  ena- 
bled to  do,  I  brought  my  want  directly  before  Him.  My 
heart  was  troubled,  and  I  told  it  to  the  Lord.  I  did  plead 
with  many  tears,  that  as  He  had  given  me  His  Son  to  die  for 
me,  He  would  not  withhold  the  lesser  blessing,  and  impart  to 

all  that  grace  he  so  much  needed  to  preserve  him  from 

the  ten  thousand  snares  Satan  would  lay  for  his  unguarded 
feet.  This  is  the  only  way  I  can  get  on.  When  trials  press 
upon  my  mind,  I  must  arise  and  carry  them  to  God.  To 
whom  else  can  I  go  ?  I  would  not  often  tell  the  dearest  friend 
in  the  world  what  passes  in  my  mind ;  but  I  can  disclose  it  all 
to  Jesus !  I  can  and  do  unbosom  myself  to  Him  whose  com- 
passions fail  not,  and  who  remembers  I  am  but  dust ;  yet  pities 
and  loves  me  better  than  I  love  myself.  Had  much  more  com- 
fort and  openness  in  prayer  in  the  family  last  night.  Felt  the 
Lord  very  near,  and  eternal  things  all-important." 

"August   2nd. — Yesterday  was   dear  's  birthday.      I 

felt  happy  at  the  birth  of  my  son,  but  that  happiness  was  tri- 
fling, although  all  that  a  fond  mother  could  feel,  in  comparison 
of  what  my  heart  experienced  at  the  hour  of  his  spiritual 
birth.  I  truly  did  travail  with  him  a  second  time,  that  Christ 
might  be  revealed  within  him  the  hope  of  glory.  Oh,  the 
gladness  of  that  interesting  moment !  Angels  united  in  a 
mother's  joy.  The  church  below,  the  church  above, — all,  all 
rejoiced ;  and  Christ  was  well  pleased  to  see  the  travail  of  His 
soul.  May  He  who  then  made  Himself  known  to  him  as  his 
Redeemer,  be  graciously  pleased  to  pour  into  his  heart  the  rich 
blessing  of  His  grace,  and  fit  and  qualify  him  for  great  useful- 
ness in  His  blessed  cause.  Give  him,  O  Lord,  humbleness  of 
spirit,  and  stamp  Thine  image  deep  within  his  inmost  soul." 

"I  increasingly  feel  that  this  is  not  my  rest;  it  is  polluted. 
Go  where  he  may,  rest  where  he  will,  trials  and  crosses  await 
the  Christian.  Oh  for  faith — a  constant,  abiding  faith,  that 
keeps  a  steady  eye  within  the  veil,  where  our  tempted,  tried, 
and  afflicted  Saviour,  now  triumphant  Conqueror,  is  seated,  and 
ever  lives  to  make  intercession  for  His  dear  people,  who  are 
following  his  footsteps !  What  a  sore  trial  is  the  working  of 
pride  within  the  heart !  I  have  had  to  conflict  with  this  enemy 
of  late,  which  I  had  almost  thought  was  quite  gone.  Heard 
an  excellent  sermon  from  the  Lord's  sent  servant,  Mr.  Evans, 
from  the  words.  Tell  me,  0  thou  lohoyn  my  soul  loveth,  where 
thou  feedest,  &c.  He  was,  as  usual^  most  sweetly  experimerx-. 
5 


98  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

tal.  It  was  chiefly  to  the  cliurch,  though  he  forgot  not  to  ad- 
dress sinners." 

"  Have  had  mucli  exercise  of  mind,  and  deep  searchings  of 
heart.  Some  new  lesson  in  the  school  of  Christ  is  daily,  nay, 
hourly,  to  be  learned ;  some  hidden  evil  to  be  felt ;  some  new 
enemy  to  be  encountered ;  some  fresh,  precious  views  of  Jesus 
to  be  obtained.  Oh,  how  lovely,  how  good — exceeding  good 
— is  Jesus  Christ  to  unworthy  me !  He  is  enough  to  satisfy 
my  soul.  When  disappointed  in  the  creature,  and  I  turn  with 
a  sickening  feeling  from  the  world  to  Christ,  I  find  here  no  dis- 
appointment; here  is  fulness  of  joy,  an  ocean  of  love,  a  heart 
to  feel  and  sympathize,  an  eye  to  pity,  and  a  power,  an  infinite 
power,  to  sup-ply  all  my  wants,  to  comfort  my  drooping  spirits, 
to  refresh  my  fainting  heart,  and  fill  me  with  joy  and  peace  in 
believing.  Jesus  is  an  all-satisfying  portion,  and  He  is  thy 
portion,  0  my  soul." 

"  Had  an  interview  yesterday  with  Mr.  Evans.  I  pray  the 
Lord  to  bless  it.  In  the  evening  went  where  I  need  not  have 
gone,  and  found  the  conversation  of  some  professing  Christians 
a  great  snare  to  my  soul.  Have  need  to  pray,  O  Lord,  not 
only  lead  me  not  into  temptation,  but  hedge  up  my  way, 
though  with  thorns  and  briers,  that  I  go  not  into  it.  Oh,  the 
sad  levity  and  trifling  of  some,  even  of  the  ministers  of  Christ! 
I  am  aware  of  the  same  evil  in  myself,  and  by  these  things  lay 
up  material  for  bitter  repentance.  On  my  return  home,  had  to 
go  to  the  Lord  for  fresh  pardon,  humbled  in  the  dust.  But 
for  ever  blessed  and  adored  be  His  name,  to  me  He  is  love.  I 
feel  to-day  a  sweet  tenderness  of  spirit ;  and  while  reading  in 
the  family,  my  heart  was  drawn  out  by  faith  to  Christ,  and 
could  not  but  speak  of  Him  to  my  children." 

"  Mr. ,  a  professed  minister  of  the  gospel,  has  been  here, 

and  has  just  left  with to  see .  I  wonder  what  busi- 
ness a  man,  declaring  himself  sent  of  God  to  lead  poor  sinners 
to  Christ,  has  to  do  with  the  sights  and  shows  of  this  perish- 
ing world !  How  can  he  exhort  his  flock  to  live  above  the 
world  and  all  its  vanities,  while  he  himself  is  going  after  them  ? 

As  good  Mr.  says,  it  is  our  duty  to  have  our  eyes  shut 

and  our  ears  stopped  to  everything  that  is  not  a  step  in  that 
ladder  that  reaches  from  earth  to  heaven.  I  cannot  under- 
stand some  Christians,  and  they  do  not  understand  me.  I 
may  be  wrong ;  but  when  I  read.  Come  out  from  among  them, 
and  be  ye  separate;  Love  not  the  world,  nor  the  things  that  are 


DIARY.  99 

in  the  world,  and  many  other  such  solemn  exhortations,  with 
so  many  exceeding  great  and  precious  promises  to  the  over- 
coming Christian,  I  am  satisfied  of  the  way  a  behever  in  Christ 
should  walk,  and  have  only  to  regret  I  so  often  wander  from 
it  myself.  Dear  Saviour,  keep  me  near,  very  near,  thy  bless- 
ed self.  Shelter  me  under  thine  almighty,  protecting  wing, 
till  the  storm  of  life  is  past.  And  oh,  in  infinite  mercy  remem- 
ber the  dear  lambs  of  the  flock,  and  suffer  them  not  to  wander 
from  Thee.  Let  them  feel  their  ow^n  weakness,  and  take  hold 
of  Thy  strength." 

"  Feeble  in  body,  but  very  happy  in  the  Lord,  a  sweet,  con- 
tented, childlike  spirit,  looking  upward  and  feeling,  as  well  as 
knowing,  God  is  good.  His  name  to  my  soul  is  Love.  Had 
a  delightful  open  view,  as  it  were,  while  engaged  in  family 
prayer,  of  the  glorious  work  of  the  all-sufficient  atonement 
and  sacrifice  of  the  Son  of  God.  Tears  flowed  while  I 
thanked  my  God,  and  my  children's  God,  for  this  most  pre- 
cious covenant  of  grace,  for  my  interest  in  it,  and  the  sweet 
assurance  I  have  that  some  of  them  are  also  interested  therein. 
Blessed,  for  ever  blessed,  be  His  most  precious  name.  I  am 
not  well,  and  this  tabernacle  seems  daily  to  decay.  Be  it  so ; 
it  shall  be  raised  again  at  the  last  day,  fashioned  like  unto  His 
glorious  body.  Christ's  owm  resurrection  is  the  earnest  given, 
and  I  know  that  my  Redeemer  liveth  to  fulfil  His  engagement; 
My  soul  rejoiceth  in  Christ  my  Saviour.  Often  the  enemy 
whispers  to  me,  when  I  feel  a  holy  nearness  to  Jesus,  and  my 
soul  is  very  happy,  that  some  trial  is  near  at  hand.  Lord,  I 
desire  to  trust  in  Thee,  in  whom  is  all  my  hope  and  my  salva- 
tion. My  children  are  Thy  children.  Blessed  be  Thy  name 
for  that.  Help  me  to  say,  *  Thy  will,  not  mine,  be  done.'  I 
cannot  do  this  wdthout  the  especial  influence  of  Thy  Spirit." 

"Sept.  1st. — Took  possession  of  my  pew  yesterday  at  John- 
street.  May  the  Lord,  in  His  rich  mercy,  make  this  step  a 
blessing  to  me  and  to  my  children.  The  steps  of  a  good  man 
are  ordered  hy  the  Lord.  Had  to  contend,  while  in  the  house 
of  God,  with  a  wandering  spirit ;  felt  it  impossible  to  keep  my 
mind  stayed  upon  the  precious  truths  I  heard,  or  attempted 
to  hear.  Oh,  how  the  w^orld,  with  all  its  cares,  crow^ds  upon 
the  poor  pilgrim,  even  in  his  most  solemn  moments !  He 
would  fain  say.  Abide  thee  here^  and  I  will  go  yonder  and  wor- 
ship. What  a  mercy  that  we  have  a  faithful  High  Priest  at 
the  right  hand  of  the  Majesty  on  high,  to  make  intercession 


ICO  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

for  all — all  our  manifold  short-comings,  sins  and  transgres- 
sions." 

"  Rev.  Mr.  W called  this  morning,  and  mentioned  that 

after  an  unsuccessful  attempt  to  obtain  a  curacy,  he  received  a 
letter  from  his  wife,  saying,  that  she  had  discovered  that  a 
confidential  servant  had  robbed  them,  and  that  she  had  deter- 
mined to  dismiss  her.     Mr.  W wrote  to  say  that  she  had 

better  keep  her  for  the  present,  as  his  circumstances  were  too 
straitened  to  pay  her  the  wages  due  to  her.  A  few  days  after, 
he  returned  home,  and  found  his  family  much  tried  by  the 
girl,  who  had  refused  to  remain,  and  had  gone  to  a  neighbour's, 
alleging  as  a  reason  for  her  leaving,  that  she  would'not  be  paid 
for  her  services.  In  addition  to  this  trial,  a  bill  from  a  trades- 
man was  sent  in,  demanding  immediate  payment.     They  had 

no  money.     Mr.  W felt  his  character  as  a  minister  was 

at  stake  in  a  village,  where  everything  was  soon  known  from 
house  to  house.  In  this  dilemma  and  distress,  they  knelt 
down  and  laid  their  case  before  the  Lord.  In  the  morning  the 
postman  brought  a  letter.  On  opening  it,  it  was  found  to  con- 
tain a  ten-pound  note  in  a  blank  cover.  This  paid  all  demands, 
and  left  a  surplus  on  hand.  Oh,  that  men  would  praise  the 
Lord  for  his  goodness  to  the  children  of  m.en !  He  came  to 
relate  to  me  this  remarkable  providence.  My  heart  felt  re- 
freshed, and  my  faith  strengthened,  by  this  sweet  manifestation 
of  God's  kind  remembrance  of  His  poor  servant.  It  is  good 
to  walk  by  faith ;  to  feel  dependent  for  all,  and  to  come  to 
Him  as  little  children  for  all  we  need." 

"  Sept.  5th. — Find  that  many  of  my  difficulties  and  trials — 
I  dare  not  call  them  afflictions — arise  from  quarters  where  one 
least  expected  them.  O  Lord,  help  me  more  and  more  to 
cease  from  man,  whose  breath  is  in  his  nostrils,  and  to  expect 
nothing  but  evil  from  an  evil  world  !  But  these  are  but  little 
trials  after  all.  They  do  not  wring  the  heart ;  they  may 
grieve  and  wound,  but  nothing  more.  I  think  I  know  what 
afflictions  are — yea,  the  deep  waters  of  affliction  too.  Bereav- 
ing providences — the  joy  of  my  heart,  the  companion  of  my 
youth,  the  father  of  my  children,  cut  down  as  with  a  stroke  ! 
Dwelling  in  a  strange  land,  surrounded  by  a  helpless  young 
family,  bereft  of  fortune  when  most  wanted — the  enemy  suf- 
fered to  buffet  my  almost  defenceless  soul,  the  very  foundations 
of  my  faith  trembling  beneath  this  flood  of  tribulation — these 
are  afflictions  1     I  was  in  the  furnace,  but  the  Lord  stood  by. 


DIARY.  101 

Since  then  I  have  been  enabled,  upon  my  knees,  amidst  floods 
of  grateful  tears,  to  thank  Him  for  those  very  afflictions  that  I 
then  thought  would  bring  me  to  nothing." 

"  8th. — Have  much  cause  to  be  humbled.  Why  does  every 
little  disappointment  affect  me  so  much  ?  I  feel  truly  I  am  a 
sinful  creature,  unable  of  myself  to  think  a  good  thought. 
Never,  never  did  sin  appear  so  hateful,  and  my  own  nothing- 
ness so  great,  as  yesterday  at  the  table  of  the  Lord.  Felt 
something  of  a  broken  heart.  I  wept  much,  but  still  my  hope 
was  in  the  Lord,  and  did  look  up,  like  the  wounded  Israelites, 
to  the  cross  of  Christ.  Lord,  my  help  is  alone  from  Thee. 
Strengthen  me  with  might  in  the  inner  man,  and  let  not  my 
enemies  prevail  against  me.  Oh,  the  hidden  evil  of  the  heart, 
unknown  and  unfelt,  until  the  Spirit  of  Christ  sees  fit  to  reveal 
the  depths  of  iniquity  that  are  there.  It  is  a  sickening  view ; 
and  were  it  not  that  Christ  Jesus  came  into  the  world  to  save 
sinners,  I  should  lie  down  in  utter  despair." 

"  18th. — How  has  my  heart  been  pained  to-day  from  what 
it  has  felt  of  evil  within  !  How  much  I  often  discover  con- 
trary to  the  Holy  Spirit  of  Christ !  To-day  has  been  one  of 
sore  conflict — the  spirit  lusting  against  the  flesh,  and  the  flesh 
lusting  against  the  spirit ;  so  that  I  have  been  obliged  again 
and  again  to  cry  to  the  Lord  for  help  from  on  high.  Nothing 
but  the  precious  blood  of  Christ  can  wash  this  guilt  away. 
How  soon  was  I  ruffled  to-day ;  and  now  could  weep,  yea,  and 
do  weep,  and  shall  weep  for  it.  Lord,  forgive  me,  for  Jesus' 
sake.  Oh,  for  a  sanctified  heart !  Lord,  undertake  for  thy 
unworthy  creature,  and  come  not  into  judgment  with  me  ! 
Look  upon  me  in  the  face  of  thy  dear  Son,  and  when  thou 
lookest,  forgive." 

"27th. — Found  much  sweetness  in  drawing  near  to  God  in 
family  worship — a  blessed  sense  of  the  reahty  of  eternal  things. 
Oh,  that  I  might  be  kept  through  this  day  with  a  steady  eye 
upon  Christ !  Read  for  our  morning's  portion  part  of  the  in- 
teresting life  of  Gideon.  How  true  it  is — Not  hy  might,  nor 
hy  poiuer,  hut  my  Spirit,  saith  the  Lord.  There  is  an  inex- 
pressible sweetness  in  the  thought,  that  salvation  is  not  of 
works ;  and  that  our  full  and  complete  acceptance  is  not  in  our 
wretched  selves.     It  is  all,  all  of  grace." 

"Nov.  7th. — A  little  more  than  twelve  months  ago  the 
Lord  led  me  up  into  the  mount,  and  showed  me  in  a  small 
measure  His  glory,  aiid  caused  His  goodness  to  pass  before 


102  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   ^YIXSLOW. 

me.  My  soul  was  happy,  oh,  how  happy.  Felt  I  was  with 
God,  and  that  God  was  with  me.  Was  permitted  to  talk  with 
Him — as  a  friend  talketh  with  his  friend.  Perceived  in  Christ 
a  fulness  I  had  no  conception  of,  and  it  was  but — Ask^  and  ye 
shall  receive.  My  dear  children  were  wonderfully  brought  to 
the  foot  of  the  cross,  and  one  after  another  translated  out  of 
Satan's  dark  kingdom  into  the  kingdom  of  God's  dear  Son. 
Shall  I  ever  forget  that  most  precious  season  of  Divine  love  ? 
Oh,  never,  7iever  may  it  be  blotted  out  of  my  mind  for  one 
moment.  But  how  is  it  now  with  thee,  oh,  my  soul  ?  What 
has  thy  God  been  showing  to  thee  of  laie  ?  He  has  been 
showing  me  more  of  the  hidden  evil  of  my  heart,  and  calling 
me  to  sore  conflicts  with  the  world,  the  flesh,  and  the  devil. 
With  this  threefold  troop  I  have  had  much  to  do  lately.  But, 
thanks  be  to  God,  my  Saviour  is  not  ovit  of  sight,  and  he  has 
engaged  to  bring  me  ofi"  more  than  conqueror." 

"  20th. — I  think  it  wrong  to  be  always  living  in  anticipation 
of  affliction,  just  because  it  is  written.  Through  much  tribulation 
ye  must  enter  the  kingdom.  Sufficient  to  the  day  is  the  evil  thereof. 
It  is  very  discouraging  to  hear  ministers  sa}^,  especially  to 
young  Christians,  '  Pray  for  faith,  but  remember,  in  so  doing, 
you  pray  for  afflictions.'  Christ  says,  Ask  anything  in  my 
name  ;  ask,  that  your  joy  might  he  full.  I  know  that  the  apos- 
tle speaks  of  rejoicing  in  tribulation.  Howbeit,  I  do  tliink  by 
constantly  poring  over  anticipated  troubles,  we  lose  the  sweet 
enjoyment  of  present  mercies  in  the  expectation  of  future  evil. 
I  pray  to  be  enabled  to  praise  Him  for  the  present,  and  trust 
His  love  for  all  that  is  to  come.  Lord,  increase  my  faith,  and 
let  my  joy  be  full." 

"Dec.  10th. — This  day  is  set  apart  by  the  churches  of  the 
Baptist  denomination  for  prayer  and  fasting,  for  the  outpouring 
of  the  Holy  Spirit.  May  God  give  His  especial  blessing,  and 
hear  their  prayers  !  The  gracious  Revivals  in  New  York  have 
stirred  up  the  Lord's  people  on  this  side  of  the  Atlantic.  May 
it  be  for  the  glory  of  His  own  name." 

"  This  evenmg  attended  a  prayer-meeting  in  John-street,  for 
the  outpouring  of  the  Holy  Spirit.  It  was  full.  The  fault  I 
generally  perceive  with  most  prayer-meetings  occurred  again 
to-night.  The  prayers  were  too  long,  and  not  to  the  point. 
Evervthing  was  touched  upon  but  the  one  thing  we  had 
agreed  to  meet  and  pray  for,  except  by  one  dear  brother,  and 
that  but  slightly.     I  do  wish   there  were  less  ^jreaching  in 


DIARY.  103 

prayer,  and  more  beseeching^  as  poor  needy  sinners,  for  what 
we  want.  On  my  return  home  I  assembled  the  domestics,  v/ho 
all  profess  to  know  the  Lord,  and  suggested  that  we  should  join 
our  supplications  as  a  household,  for  the  great  blessing  that 
thousands  to-night  were  looking  up  for.  I  read  the  second  of 
the  Acts.  We  then  sang  an  appropriate  hymn,  when  each — 
all  except  the  housemaid — prayed,  following  each  other  with- 
out rising  from  our  knees.  We  had  four  short,  sweet,  and 
simple  prayers,  and  it  was  a  time  of  refreshing,  for  which  God 
be  praised.  Oh,  that  the  Holy  Spirit  may  be  poured  out  from 
on  high  upon  all  our  souls,  and  upon  the  churches." 

"20th. — Still  travelling  on,  I  humbly  trust,  through  this 
w^aste  howling  wilderness,  to  my  heavenly  home.  Want  to 
look  more  to  Jesus,  that  I  may  be  strengthened  for  this  con- 
tinual warfare,  for  so  it  is  with  me.  But  am  too  often  looking 
to  some  broken  cistern  still ;  but  afterwards  can  say,  when  en- 
abled to  turn  and  take  a  fresh  view  of  Christ,  I  do  prefer  Him, 
with  all  my  trials  and  cares,  to  all  that  the  world  calls  good." 

"Jan.  21st,  1829. — What  a  mercy,  of  more  value  than  a 
thousand  worlds,  to  walk  in  the  fear  of  the  Lord  all  the  day 
long ;  to  be  enabled  to  live  above  the  smiles  or  frowns  of  this 
world,  and  to  find  the  love  of  Christ  all-satisfying  to  our  souls  ; 
to  feel  all  creature-love  swallowed  up  in  Christ,  and  to  know 
that  he  loves  us  better  than  we  love  ourselves.  Have  felt 
these  few  days  very  comfortable,  stayed  upon  the  Lord :  and 
to-day,  sweet  peace  and  joy,  arising  from  a  believing  view 
of  the  ever-blessed  gospel  of  the  Son  of  God.  As  soon  as  I 
take  my  eye  from  Jesus,  and  look  for  anything  like  comfort 
from  this  world,  or  look  within  for  something  to  rest  upon,  I 
begin  to  be  in  trouble,  and  have  again  to  run  into  the  name  of 
the  Lord,  which  is  a  strong  tower  to  my  soul  at  all  times." 

"  Have  been  conflicting  more  or  less,  for  some  time,  with 
vain  thoughts.  But  yet  I  can  say,  In  the  multitude  of  my 
thoughts  laithin  me,  thy  comforts  delight  my  soul.  But  yet  what 
grief  it  is  that  my  thoughts  are  not  always  on  the  Saviour, 
and  that  there  is  such  proneness  to  attempt  to  draw  comfort 
from  the  creature,  and  to  sorrow  when  we  find  it  all  vanity 
and  vexation  of  spirit.  Oh,  why  look  to  creature-love  when 
the  love  of  Christ  is  always  the  same  ? " 

"  March  8th. — How  many  mercies  have  I  had  to  recount 
since  I  last  wrote  in  this  journal !  How  much  of  God's  gra- 
cious dealings  with  my  soul  have  I  omitted  to  record — and  I 


104  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

regret  it;  for  it  is  good  to  look  back  and  see,  from  time  to 
time,  how  wonderfully  and  mercifully  He  leads  His  people 
forward  through  a  host  of  enemies  to  that  happy  place  He  has 
prepared  for  them.  I  find  Mr.  Evans's  ministry  as  rich  pas- 
ture to  my  soul,  and  the  fellowship  of  the  church  very  sweet 
and  encouraging.  '  How  sweet  to  my  soul  is  communion  with 
saints ! '  I  can  truly  say  so." 

"April  13th. — Had,  to-day,  a  most  sweet  and  endearing 
view  of  God,  as  my  Father  in  Christ.  Felt  as  if  the  Lord 
were  again  about  to  pour  out  His  Spirit,  and  revive  His  work 
in  our  hearts.  Went  this  morning  to  see  Yf  est's  picture  gal- 
lery. A  view  of  '  Death  on  the  Pale  Horse,'  and  '  Christ 
Kejected,'  was  very  interesting.  But  who  can  portray,  in  any 
painting,  the  extent  of  misery  and  woe  sin  has  brought  into 
our  world ;  or  the  sufferings  of  that  holy,  spotless  soul,  that 
was  once  on  Calvary  made  an  offering  for  sin?  Upon  the 
whole,  it  is  not  an  outward  exhibition  of  these  important 
truths  to  the  natural  eye,  but  the  application  of  them  to  the 
heart  by  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  that  can  alone  con- 
vince, humblCj  and  lead  the  soul  to  Christ.  May  I  be  led 
more  and  more  to  cling  to  Jesus,  and  feel  increasingly  the 
power  of  His  resurrection  in  my  soul :  the  Spirit  bearing  testi- 
mony within  that  He  still  lives  to  do  all  He  has  promised  for 
me  and  mine,  and  all  who  come  unto  Him." 

"  Answered  Mr.  W 's  letter  of  inquiry,  respecting  the 

revivals  in  America.  In  his  acknowledgment,  he  seems  de- 
lighted with  having  an  account  from  one  who  had  been  so 
blest  in  such  a  season  of  especial  love,  and  who  could  bear  a 
personal  testimony  to  the  truth  of  them.     Received  from  him 

a  kind  invitation  to  visit  N ;  but  cannot  go  so  far  from 

home,  unless  the  Lord  had  something  for  me  to  do  there.  1 
am  his.  Blessed  be  His  name !  if  it  were  His  will  to  send 
me  to  the  farthest  corner  of  the  globe,  to  bear  my  evidence  to 
that  most  blessed  truth,  I  would  most  willingly  go.  God  does 
pour  out  His  Spirit  in  a  most  especial  manner  upon  His  church. 
At  such  times  of  '  refreshing  from  the  presence  of  the  Lord,' 
sinners  are  converted  to  God,  and  saints  are  avrakened  out  of 
their  slumbers,  and  set  out  with  fresh  vigour  and  zeal  to  run 
the  heavenly  race.     Thanks  be  to  God  for  such  seasons  !  " 

"When  the  first  Adam  fell,  God  cursed  the  ground  for 
man's  sake,  and  said,  Thorns  also  and  thistles  shall  it  hrinfj 
forth  to  thee.     When  Christ,  the  Second  Adam,  came  ta  by 


DIAEY.  105 

made  a  curse  for  us,  He  was  crowned  with  those  very  thorns 
with  which  the  earth  was  cursed,  thereby  removing  the  curse 
far  from  us.  How  wretchedly  poor  are  my  best  conceptions 
of  this  most  glorious  work !  Dear  Lord,  enlighten  my  under- 
standing, that  I  may  more  and  more  see  the  infinite  value  of 
this  wondrous  work  of  everlasting  love ;  and  may  my  base 
ingratitude  and  unbelief  never  be  thorns  to  wound  Thee  afresh. 
Give  me  more  of  that  precious  faith  that  purifies  the  heart  and 
works  by  love." 

"  I  have  been  ill,  and  was  much  reduced  in  strength,  but 
the  Lord  has  heard  prayer.  At  a  time  when  my  disorder  was 
peculiarly  distressing,  and  was  pronounced  likely  to  be  fatal,  a 
word  of  rich  comfort  was  brought  to  my  mind,  and  I  was  sup- 
ported. This  was  the  passage  of  Scripture  my  mind  was 
stayed  upon  :  With  God  all  things  are  possible.  Then,  thought 
I,  it  is  possible  He  can  reheve  me  from  this  sore  disease ;  and 
I  know  something  of  his  tender  mercies,  and  that  His  ear  is 
ever  open  to  the  cry  of  His  people.  My  pain  was  removed, 
and  my  strength  is  gradually  returning.  Oh,  how  precious  is 
a  throne  of  grace,  and  a  God  of  grace  to  go  to ! " 

"  Last  week,  dined  with  the  poor  of  the  church,  nearly 
sixty  in  number.  The  rich  waited  upon  the  poor,  and  they 
seemed  happy.  The  dinner  was  provided  by  our  dear  pastor, 
who  also  waited  upon  them.  It  was  a  delightful  day — not 
soon  to  be  forgotten.  We  had  much  Christian  experience  and 
profitable  conversation,  and  did  not  separate  until  near  nine 
o'clock.  Want  more  life  in  my  soul — more  of  the  Spirit's 
influence — a  closer  walk  with  God." 

"  How  often  has  an  unkind  look  or  word  proved  a  blessing 
to  my  soul !  It  has  made  me  flee  to  Christ ;  and  there  I  have 
found  no  unkindness.  He  has  appeared,  at  such  times,  more 
than  to  make  up  for  the  want  of  all  creature-love  and  created 
good." 

"  The  King  of  England  is  very  ill,  and  perhaps  will  shortly 
be  called  to  lay  aside  all  his  earthly  honours  and  royal  ap- 
parel, and  feel  his  crown  of  nothing  worth.  What  a  change  ! 
What  are  kings  better  than  the  poorest  beggar,  when  they 
are  about  to  die?  One  drop  of  the  precious  blood  that  cleans- 
eth  from  all  sin,  and  applied  by  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost, 
is  of  more  worth  to  a  dying  sinner  than  millions  of  kingdoms. 
How  does  our  poor  King  feel  at  this  present  moment  ?  God 
be  merciful  to  his  soul  I " 
5* 


106  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

"  The  Lord  has  housed  my  dear  H 's  eldest  girl  before 

she  had  tasted  much  of  the  bitter  weeds  growing  in  this  waste, 
howling  wilderness.  He  took  her  to  Himself;  and  she  is  safe 
from  the  windy  storm  and  tempest.  Oh,  for  grace  to  improve 
all  His  dispensations,  and  to  remember,  that  all  things  luork  to- 
gether  for  good  to  them  that  love  God,  to  them  who  are  called 
according  to  His  purpose.  I  desire  to  keep  a  steadfast  eye 
upon  Christ,  come  what  may — desiring  no  will  but  His!" 

"  Tlie  King  of  England  now  lies  in  his  splendid  palace, 
closed  in  his  leaden  coffin  from  the  sight  of  every  one.  Nearly 
his  last  words  were,  '  0  God,  I  am  dying  ! '  And  a  few  mo- 
ments before  he  expired,  looking  wistfully  around  upon  his 
attendants,  he  exclaimed,  'This  is  death!'  But  oh,  what  is 
the  death  of  the  body  in  comparison  of  the  death  of  the  soul  1 
Mrs.  P is  also  taken  away  in  a  moment.  She  was  pre- 
paring mourning  for  the  king ;  but  they  have  met  in  eternity. 
The  curtain  has  fallen,  and  we  cannot  tell  what  is  passing 
there.  Oh,  how  needful  to  be  ready  !  Precious  Jesus  !  bind 
the  gospel  to  my  heart,  and  let  it  be  dearer  to  me  than  ever." 

"  Dec.  26. — Was  ill  yesterday,  and  was  obliged  to  keep  my 
bed.  The  family  had  a  happy  day  together.  It  was  pleasant 
to  them   to  meet  so  many,  and   I   am  sure  my  kind-hearted 

T was  as  happy  as  a  prince.     After  all  I  could  not  but 

reflect  on  the  way  in  which  Christmas-day  is  generally  kept. 
It  is  the  birth-day  of  our  blessed  Lord.  In  general,  when  the 
world  celebrates  the  birth-day  of  a  highly  distinguished  indi- 
vidual, they  speak  much  of  his  character,  ways,  and  exploits. 
But  on  this  day  of  carnal  delight,  Christ's  name  [in  the  social 
circle]  is  seldom  mentioned.  He  is  kept  out  of  sight,  or  if  any 
allusion  should  be  made  to  him,  it  would  be  received  with 
grave  looks  and  sullen  indifference.  Oh,  w^hat  a  God  of  long- 
suffering  is  ours !  How  He  bears  with,  and  how  much  He  has 
to  bear  with,  even  in  his  children.  May  He  keep  us  from  the 
evil  of  the  world  !  *  I  pray  not  that  thou  shouldest  take  them 
out  of  the  luorld,  but  that  thou  shouldest  keep  them  from  the  evilT" 

From  her  diary  we  turn  again  to  her  correspondence,  which 
affords  a  further  insight  into  the  activities  of  her  Christianity. 
Truly,  like  her  Lord  and  Master,  she  "went  about  doing  good." 
And  here  it  may  be  appropriate  to  advert  to  a  feature  in  Mrs. 
Winslow's  Christianity,  thus  far  almost  entirely  veiled  from 
sight.  The  simple  design  with  which  we  set  out  was  to  ex- 
hibit more  her  inner  and  hidden,  than  her  outward  and  visible 


DIARY.  107 

life.  The  careful  reader  will  not  fail  to  infer  from  the  preced- 
ing pages,  and  will  still  more  so  from  those  which  follow,  that 
her  Christianity  w^as  eminently  irractical.  Her  whole  religious 
life  was  an  embodiment  of  the  great  principle — "  No  man 
liveth  to  himself"  From  the  moment  that  she  felt  the  power 
of  vital  godliness  in  her  own  soul,  the  grand,  all-absorbing  aim 
of  her  hfe  was  the  bringing  of  souls  to  Christ.  She  sought  to 
accomplisli  this  in  that  way  for  which  God  had  peculiarly  fitted 
her.  Other  Christians,  equally  devoted  and  zealous,  may  have 
possessed  more  taste  and  aptitude  for  Committee  work ;  and 
others  might  be  more  frequently  seen  moving  amidst  the  whirl 
and  din  of  the  great  machinery  of  Christian  benevolence.  But 
while  in  the  earlier  stages  of  her  religious  course,  when  health 
and  time  were  more  at  her  command,  she  took  a  prominent 
and  active  part  in  the  various  religious  societies  of  the  day, 
yet  as  years  grew  on,  and  life  became  more  mellowed  and  con- 
templative, she  sought  to  promote  the  same  object  from  more 
concealed  and  sequestered  points  of  observation.  It  would 
therefore  be  unjust  to  the  subject  of  our  Memoir  to  infer,  that 
because  we  especially  restrict  ourselves  to  the  more  important 
feature  of  her  Christian  character — her  walk  with  God — 
that  therefore  it  was  deficient  in  that  outward  and  correspond- 
ing life  of  Christian  activity — that  '  looking  not  upon  our  own 
things,  but  also  upon  the  things  of  others' — which,  more  or  less, 
is  essential  to  the  harmony  and  symmetry  of  Christian  charac- 
ter. If  ever  an  individual  laboured  for  the  conversion  of  sin- 
ners, it  was  she.  But  she  laboured,  as  we  have  remarked,  in 
that  way  for  which  God  had  peculiarly  and  eminently  qualified 
her.  He  had  given  her  the  "  pen  of  a  ready  writer."  This 
gift — a  rare  and  a  powerful  one — she  wholly  and  constantly 
consecrated  to  God.  It  is  believed  she  seldom  wrote  a  note, 
however  brief,  in  w^hich  there  was  not  something  to  lead  the 
thoughts  to  eternity.  But  not  to  this  instrumentality  of  doing 
good  was  she  wholly  restricted.  For  several  years  she  had  her 
district,  which  she  faithfully  and  systematically  visited.  And 
when  too  advanced  in  life  for  so  active  an  employment,  she 
would  often  steal  away  to  some  scene  of  sickness  and  sorrow 
amongst  the  abodes  of  the  poor,  especially  to  those  who  were 
of  the  'household  of  faith,'  to  administer  spiritual  instruction 
and  comfort,  and  on  her  way  home  she  w^ould  frequently  make 
purchases  for  their  temporal  necessities.  Truly,  like  her  Lord 
and  Master  she  "  w^ent  about  doing  good." 


108        MEMOIR  OF  MRS.  MARY  WINSLOW. 
TO  HER  MOTHER. 

"  I  have  just  returned  from  visiting  the  poor  and  wretched 
in  the  lanes  and  alleys  of  this  great  town.  I  have  but  little 
time  to  write  as  I  formerly  did.  I  often  have  thought  that  the 
Lord  had  nothing  more  for  me  to  do ;  but  He  seems  to  have 
called  me  to  my  old  work  again,  and  it  is  one  I  always  had, 
and  still  have,  great  delight  in.     IMay  He  bless  it  to  me  and 

to  the  poor  to  whom  I  am  sent.     Mr. and  I  go  arm  and 

arm  with  our  Bibles  from  house  to  house,  arid  from  attic  to 
attic.  He  always  gets  a  little  behind  when  I  am  leaving  and 
tells  them  to  be  sure  and  '  say  their  prayers.'  He  is  a  high 
churchman,  but  I  believe  he  is  laying  it  aside  every  day. 
There  is  no  doubt  in  my  own  mind  of  his  conversion.  He  is 
the  Lord's,  and  He  is  teaching  him." 

"  If  dear  is,  through   God's  blessing,   with  you,   my 

dearest  mamma,  you  will  find  enough  in  the  journal  addressed 
to  him  to  interest  you  as  far  as  details  go.  I  do  feel  very 
anxious  about  you  all  at  this  unhealthy  season  of  the  year. 
May  God  preserve  you  all !  How  very  necessary  to  have  our 
witness  within  quite  clear,  that  when  he  says,  '  Come  up 
hither,'  we  might  be  able  to  reply,  '  Lo,  Lord,  with  joy  I 
come !'  Oh,  to  look  upon  this  world  continually  as  one  we 
have  nothing  to  do  with  but  to  pass  through  it  to  the  glory  of 
Him  who  has  prepared  a  better  for  us !  The  road  through  it 
was  designed  to  be  a  thorny  one,  that  we  should  not  set  our 
affections  here  ;  and  as  it  is  our  dear  Lord's  will  that  we  should 
have  tribulation,  what  a  mercy  for  us  that  He  chooses  all  our 
trials,  and  arranges  them  in  proper  order  in  His  infinite  love 
and  wisdom  to  suit  our  soul's  best  interests.  Let  us  look 
oftener  to  our  mercies,  and  less  to  our  trials,  and  then  see  what 
cause — oh,  what  cause — we  have  for  thankfulness.  I  feel  at 
present  very  low,  but  am  trying  to  look  to  Jesus.  The  cares 
of  my  children,  though  not  beneath  my  roof,  and  under  my 
eye,  are  ever  mine  in  a  measure.  Who  can  tell  what  a 
mother's  heart  feels,  but  a  mother  ?  You  and  I  know  ;  but 
what  is  best  of  all,  our  God  knows.  Let  us  think  a  little  of 
our  home — our  pleasant  home.  A  precious  Jesus  waiting  to 
welcome  his  weary  pilgrims  there.  A  sweet  home  indeed — a 
Father's  home- — and  a  happy  meeting  with  all  who  are  dear  to 
us  and  to  Christ,  No  more  sea  to  separate  us — no  more  sick- 
ness^ no  more  sin,  nor  more  labour — but  one  endless  scene  ol 
love  and  happiness.'- 


LETTERS   TO    HER    CHILDREN.  109 

TO    HER    SON    R . 


"My  dearest  R , 

"  How  is  it  that  you  do  not  write  more  often  ?  It 
grieves  me  much  when  I  do  not  hear.  I  have  heard  that 
your  httle  R.  was  ill ;  and  as  no  letters  have  come  to  hand,  I 
begin  to  fear  some  evil,  and  my  spirit  seems  to  rest  upon  you, 
my  precious  child.  Oh,  that  God  might  keep  you  from  all 
evil ;  above  all,  keep  you  from  ever  sinning  against  Him,  or 
grieving  His  Holy  Spirit,  by  whom  you  are  sealed  unto  the 
day  of  redemption.  I  do  pray  that  the  glory  of  God  might 
be  dearer  to  you  than  your  own  life.  Oh,  be  very  jealous  of 
it,  and  watchful  over  yourself.  Think  what  a  God,  God  has 
been  to  me.  How  He  has  led  me  continually  to  look  to  Him 
in  all  my  diflBculties,  and  dehvered  me  out  of  all  my  troubles. 
Oh,  it  is  sweet  to  live  a  life  ol  holy  dependence  upon  the 
Saviour !  I  find  it  more  and  more  so  every  day.  May  he 
save  you  from  trusting  your  own  heart,  or  leaning  to  your  own 
understanding  in  anything.  I  feel  I  as  much  need  His  faith- 
ful hand  at  every  step  now  as  when  I  first  started  in  the  divine 
life,  and  so  will  you.  Oh,  try  Him.  The  more  you  try  Him, 
the  more  you  will  find  Him  a  Brother  horn  for  adversity. 
Make  use  of  His  precious  promises.  He  will  accept  them, 
and  make  full  payment,  and  you  shall  have  to  praise  and  bless 
His  holy  name.  Oh,  that  God  might  be  pleased  in  mercy  to 
keep  us  all  from   ever  bringing  a   disrepute   upon  His  holy 

cause.     It  were  better  to  die.     I  think is  still  seeking, 

but  he  certainly  has  not  found  Him  yet,  whom  we  love  and 
desire  to  love  more  and  more.  Oh,  how  precious  is  Jesus  to  a 
poor  seeking  sinner  !  His  name  is  as  ointment  poured  forth. 
What  a  mercy  that  when  we  sin  we  have  in  Him  an  Advo- 
cate, and  a  fountain  still  open  to  wash  away  our  sin,  and  al- 
ways welcome  to  come ;  never  so  welcome  to  Christ  as  when 
we  feel  our  misery  and  poverty,  our  nothingness  and  unwor- 
thiness.  He  it  is  who  gives  the  broken  and  contrite  heart  that 
He  delights  to  look  upon.  The  enemy  would  fain  keep  us 
from  Christ  when  we  feel  our  vileness ;  but  it  was  for  sinners 
Jesus  died.  May  the  Lord  bless  you,  and  keep  you  moment 
by  moment,  is  the  daily  prayer  of  your  affectionate  mother." 


to  her  son  h . 

"  My  dearest  H , 

"  .  .  ,  .  AYhat  should  we  do  were  it  not  for  a  throne 
of  grace  to  go  to  ?     In  all  my  troubles  and  difiiculties  I  floe  to 


110  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

Christ,  for  none  can  help  me  but  Him.  Do  you  the  same. 
You  need  not  carry  your  own  burdens,  when  Christ  has  com- 
manded you  to  cast  them  on  Him.  Learn,  in  the  earher 
stages  of  your  Christian  pilgrimage,  to  go  constantly  to  Jesus. 
Live  upon  Him  for  all  you  need  for  both  soul  and  body,  for 
He  has  redeemed  and  will  take  care  of  both.  In  doing 
this  you  honour  Christ,  and  glorify  your  Father  who  is  in 
heaven.  Another  thing  I  would  wish  to  impress  upon  yon 
is,  never  to  keep  guilt  upon  your  conscience.  As  soon  as 
you  are  sensible  of  having  sinned,  go  that  moment  to  Jesus, 
confess  it,  and  ask  His  cleansing  blood  to  be  applied,  and  the 
guilt  removed.  Do  not  be  tempted  to  put  it  off  to  a  more 
convenient  hour.  Here  Satan  will  endeavour  to  foil  you  by 
persuading  you  that  it  is  time  enough  to  confess  that  sin  at 
night,  when  you  retire  for  prayer ;  but  go  at  that  moment  to 
Christ,  and  this  will  eimble  you  always  to  rejoice  in  Him,  and 
enable  you  to  retain  a  tender  conscience,  which  is  a  great 
blessing.  .  .  .  We  have  no  revivals  here,  but  still  there  is  a 
great  deal  of  sterling  Christianity  found." 

TO    HER   SON    O . 

" .  .  .  .  Oh,  what  a  God  do  you  serve  ?  How  infinitely 
condescending  in  all  His  steps  towards  you,  and  how  deeply 
indebted  are  you  to  give  yourself  entirely  to  Him  !  Dear 
Mr.  Evans  was  showing  on  Tuesday  evening  the  various 
w^ays  in  which  a  believer  first  declined  from  God.  One  was 
in  making  light  of  little  sins.  He  remarked  the  Holy  Spirit 
might  be  grieved  even  by  a  look — a  lie  in  the  heart  which 
did  not  escape  the  lips — a  w^ord — a  thing  which  might  be 
liwfnl  in  itself,  but  might  wound  the  tender  conscience.  The 
Spirit  consequently  withdraws  His  heavenly  influence,  and  the 
soul  is  left  barren  and  cold :  and  this  state  grows  more  and 
more,  until  the  Lord  again  appears,  restores  the  soul,  and 
heals  the  poor  backslider.  There  is  a  backsliding  in  heart 
which  only  God  can  discern.  Oh,  let  us  beware  of  that. 
Beware  of  trifling  conversation  ;  it  grieves  the  Spirit.  One 
way  to  be  assured  that  we  are  not  going  hack  in  the  divine 
life  is  to  go  forioard.  This  is  an  observation  of  Mr.  Evans 
yesterday,  and  which  he  says  he  got  from  good  Mr.  Adams, 
of  whom  he  speaks  in  the  highest  terms  as  a  minister  and  a 
Christian.     He  preaches  at  Cowes." 


LETTERS  TO  HER  SON.  Ill 

TO  HER  MOTHER. 

"  .  .  .  .  To-morrow  we  shall  have  our  dear  pastor  again. 
Oh,  what  a  precious  gospel  we  hear  ;  doctrinal,  practical,  and 
experimental  religion,  beautifully  blended.  He  preaches  the 
gospel,  lives  and  walks  in  it.  We  all  love  him.  He  is  truly 
a  man  of  God,  liighly  gifted,  yet  humble  as  a  little  child.  I 
never  knew  a  man  who  seemed  to  find  his  way  to  one's  affec- 
tions as  Mr  Evans  does  in  his  preaching.  He  arrests  your 
attention,  instructs  3'our  mind,  and  captivates  your  heart. 
While  he  is  preaching,  you  never  see  a  wandering  eye.  Oh, 
for  many  more  such  labourers !....!  have  had  a  minister 
from on  a  visit ;  but  his  conversation  has  been  unprofit- 
able. He  is  too  light  and  trifling.  My  soul  was  grieved  ; 
but  remembering  that  a  sparrow  falls  not  to  the  ground  with- 
out my  Lord,  I  thought  he  was  sent  here  by  Him.  I  asked 
the  Lord  if  He  had  not  sent  him,  to  remove  him  ;  or  that,  if 
He  had,  to  change  his  spirit  and  sanctify  his  sojourn  under  my 
roof.  The  Lord  heard  me.  This  man  is  changed  for  the 
better,  and  confesses  he  feels  as  different  as  a  man  could  feel 
from  what  he  did  before  he  came.  He  attended  Mr.  Evans's 
ministry,  which  was  greatly  blest  to  him  ;  and  he  is  now 
humble  as  a  little  child,  and  his  conversation  serious  and 
proper.  He  remarked  to  me,  '  I  believe  in  Revivals  now,  for 
I  can  truly  say  I  feel  a  revival  in  my  own  soul  since  I  came 
to  town.'  So  you  see  how  good  is  God  to  all  who  trust  in 
Him. 


TO    HER    SON    0- 


"  Sabbath. — Heard  Mr.  Evans  from  the  words.  Bear  ye  one 
another's  burdens,  and  so  fulfil  the  laiu  of  Christ.  How  deep 
are  the  riches  of  the  love  of  Christ.  The  Lord  does  wonder- 
fully open  His  heart  to  this  His  beloved  servant.  In  the 
afternoon  the  newly-appointed  deacons  were  set  apart.  It 
was  a  most  dehghtful  season.  Mr.  Evans  so  humble  and 
excellent  in  his  address  to  them,  particularly  in  his  allusion  to 
their  care  for,  and  their  kindness  and  tenderness  towards  the 
poor — their  poor  brethren.  Saw  beloved  Mr.  Whitmore  ;  he 
gave  me  a  loving  look  for  you,  I  know.  It  was  just  such  a 
look  as  he  used  to  give  you,  so  you  can  fancy  it. 

"  Well,  I  have  been  to  prayer  for  you.  What  a  comfort 
we  can  meet  at  a  throne  of  grace,  although  so  far  apart :  and 


112  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.   MARY   WINSLOW. 

that  Jesus  can  answer  our  petitions  for  eacli  other  at  the  very 
moment  they  are  presented !  God  be  praised  for  this  glori- 
ous plan  of  salvation,  and  this  method  of  access  to  Him,  so 
suited  to  our  condition.  No  other  way  would  have  done.  I 
see,  dear  child,  by  the  papers,  you  are  delivering  a  course  of 
sermons  on  the  Second  Advent  of  Christ.  I  pray  you  may 
be  kept  within  the  strictest  bounds  of  Scripture,  for  it  is 
critical  ground  upon  which  you  are  treading,  and  the  imagina- 
tion may  be  made  a  handle  of  by  the  enemy  of  souls  to  lead 
you  into  vain  speculations,  as  it  has  done  many  others.  Keep 
close  to  the  word  of  God.     Do  not  wear  yourself  out. 

"  I  miss  your  arm  when  I  go  to  the  house  of  God,  and  the 
little  chat  when  we  return.  But  I  think  of  you  as  I  go,  and 
remember  Jesus  has  said,  I  will  never  leave  thee  nor  forsake  thee. 
Heaven  would  be  no  heaven  to  me  if  I  did  not  find  my  Sa- 
viour there — He  who  loved  me  in  prosperity,  loved  me  in  ad- 
versity, and  will  love  me  even  unto  death.  This  evening  I 
received  your  interesting  letter.  It  did  me  good,  but  I  was 
grieved  to  hear  your  spirits  were  depressed.  My  precious 
child,  when  you  accepted  the  pastoral  office,  you  commenced  a 
life  of  trial  both  from  saint  and  from  sinner.  Oh,  do  not  be 
surprised  at  all  you  meet  with.  Look  to  Jesus.  Do  not  let 
difficulties  dirtress  you.  The  cause  is  Christ's,  and  all  you 
have  to  do  is  to  take  them  to  Him." 

"  16th. — Since  I  last  wrote,  the  Lord  has  turned  my  heart 
to  praise,  and  has  most  blessedly  drawn  my  soul  nearer  to 
Himself,  and  blessed  me  with  a  clearer  view  of  Jesus  seated 
at  His  right  hand — risen  indeed ;  risen  for  me,  and  risen  for 
you.  These  words  have  been  a  sweet  portion  to  my  soul : — 
This  Jesus  has  God  raised  up,  of  ivhom  toe  all  are  witnesses. 
And  you  all  are  witnesses  too,  my  dear  children;  for  surely 
God  did  bow  the  heavens,  and  pour  out  His  Holy  Spirit  upon 
you  as  a  witness  that  He  that  was  dead  w^as  alive,  and  liveth 
for  evermore.  Oh,  witness  for  Him !  let  your  preaching  wit- 
ness for  Him,  let  your  lives  witness  for  Him,  let  your  hearts 
witness  for  Him,  abounding  in  love  towards  Him,  and  towards 
all  who  bear  His  image." 

TO    HER    SON    H . 


"  ....  I  have  just  heard  of  the  loss  of  your  dear  little 
M.  E. — I  feel  more  for  you  than  for  the  dear  child ;  for  she,  I 
know,  is  happy  beyond  description ;  but  you,  the  dear  par- 


INTERESTING    DISCOVERY.  113 

ients,  will  feel  it  keenly.  I  trust  the  Lord  who  has  wounded 
will  heal  and  sanctify.  We  ought  to  hold  our  comforts  with  a 
loose  hand.  This  is  a  little  scion  severed  from  the  parent  stem, 
and  transplanted  to  the  garden  of  glory  above.  We  ought  to 
rejoice  while  we  mourn,  that  she  is  taken  from  the  evil  to  come, 
and  so  soon  made  happy.  Keep  your  eye  upon  Christ.  He 
loves  you  as  you  loved  your  little  one,  but  He  loved  her  far 
more,  and  so  took  her  to  the  enjoyment  of  Himself  May  He 
preserve  you  both,  and  keep  you  near  Himself"  .... 

TO    HER    MOTHER. 

"  ....  I  am  as  sure  as  I  have  got  this  pen  in  my  hand 
that  a  life  of  constant  employment  is  the  best  for  the  Chris- 
tian ;  and,  on  the  contrary,  a  life  of  worldly  ease  and  prosperi- 
ty is  a  time  of  temptation  to  the  soul,  and  great  grace  is 
needed  to  keep  us  from  falling  into  it.  Trials  and  difficulties 
lead  to  God,  and  the  soul  is  kept  lively  and  active.  When 
external  things  flourish,  inward  things  droop.  When  the 
world  frowns,  Christ  is  welcome,  and  we  flee  to  Him  ;  and 
this  is  one  of  the  reasons  that  our  Heavenly  Father  so  often 
appears  to  chide,  for  His  love  is  always  the  same,  even  when 
Providence  frowns.  I  do  not  know  whether  I  told  you  of  a 
little  circumstance  that  took  place  a  few  days  ago.  I  was 
called  to  visit  the  case  of  a  poor  widow  with  seven  children, 
living  in  a  miserable  alley,  and  in  great  distress  and  want. 
After  some  conversation  with  her,  which  did  not  entirely  sat- 
isfy me  that  she  was  altogether  a  Christian,  I  left  her  some  as- 
sistance, pointing  her,  at  the  same  time,  to  the  widow's  best 
Friend.  On  visiting  her  again,  after  some  conversation  not  at 
all  satisfactory,  I  went  to  prayer,  bringing  her  and  myself  to 
God,  not  as  saints,  but  as  two  poor  sinners.  My  heart  was 
much  drawn  out  to  plead  for  her  ,•  so  much  so,  that  I  wept  as 
I  prayed.  On  resuming  my  seat,  the  poor  woman  made  some 
allusion  to  her  husband's  ordination.  '  Was  your  husband  a 
minister?'     I  asked.     'Yes,  ma'am,  he  was  •  and  he  preached 

the  truth,  for  which  he  was  persecuted.     His  name  was .' 

'Was  he  ever  in  America?'  'Yes,  in  New  York.'  Did  he 
ever  preach  in  London  ?'  '  Yes,  and  came  to  this  house  to 
die.'  I  was  deeply  affected  to  find  I  was  in  the  lowly  cottage 
where  the  Rev,  Mr.  ,  whom  I  had  often  heard  with  inter- 
est, breathed  his  last.  I  said,  '  I  knew  your  husband  in  New 
York.'     She  eagerly  fixed  her  eyes,  swimming  in  tears,  on  my 


il4  MEMOIR   OP    MRS.    MARY   AVIXSLOW. 

face,  and  said,  '  Oh,  ma'am,  tell  me  your  name.'  On  being  in- 
formed, she  said,  '  Ah !  I  have  heard  my  poor  husband  men- 
lion  that  name ;  and  only  think  that  you  should  be  brouglit 
here,  in  such  a  place,  to  visit  me  !'  I  felt  very  much  affected ; 
and,  as  you  may  suppose,  more  interested  in  her  case  than 
ever.  Good-night.  The  watchman  is  crying  the  hour  of  nine 
o'clock." 


TO    HER    SOX    0 . 

"October  9th. — On  Sunday  evening  I  worshipped  in  Pen 
tonville  Chapel,  and  heard  Mr.  Sheppard.  As  soon  as  I  was 
seated,  I  felt  such  an  inexpressible  love  to  God  for  His  great 
and  wonderful  goodness  to  me  in  all  my  weary  pilgrimage, 
from  the  time  I  used  to  worship  there  with  your  dear  father 
and  all  you  little  ones,  that  I  wept.  I  took  a  review  of  all 
the  way  He  had  led  me,  the  troubles  and  difficulties  through 
which  He  had  brought  me,  His  long-suffering  patience  and 
unmerited  goodness  and  love  in  following,  upholding,  and  com- 
forting me,  and  at  last  bringing  me  back  where  my  eyes  again 
saw  my  teacher  in  the  sanctuary  where  I  first  heard  of  a 
precious  salvation  and  a  crucified  Saviour.  He  caused  all  His 
goodness  to  pass  before  me,  and  my  heart  overflowed  with 
penitence  and  love,  I  felt,  too,  near  the  body  of  my  dear 
husband,  whose  spirit,  I  trust,  is  rejoicing  in  glory  with  Christ. 
Dear  Mr,  Sheppard  preached  an  interesting  sermon  on  prayer, 
illustrated  by  Samson,  when  he  pulled  down  the  pillars,  and 
destroyed  both  himself  and  the  Philistines.  But  there  wa8 
too  much  of  Samson,  and  too  little  of  Christ," 

"IStli, — Heard  Mr.  Evans  from  Hebrews  iv.  14;  Seeing 
then  that  we  have  a  great  High  Priest^  that  is  i:)assed  into  the 
heavens^  Jesus  the  Son  of  God^  let  us  hold  fast  our  iwofession. 
He  dwelt  a  great  deal  upon  the  real  professor  holding  fast  his 
profession,  in  which  he  advanced  much  to  encourage ;  while 
he  addressed  nominal  professors  very  awfully,  and  half-hearted 
professors  very  closely.  While  the  Doxology  was  being  sung, 
I  thought  I  would  raise  my  voice  in  praise,  which,  as  soon  as 
I  did,  the  Lord  broke  sweetly  into  my  soul,  and  filled  my 
heart  with  joy  and  peace, — the  peace  which  the  world  knows 
nothino;  of." 


Oh  for  this  love  let  rocks  and  hills 
Their  lasting  silence  break." 


LETTER    TO    HER    SON'.  115 

"  Monday. — I  was  yesterday  enabled  to  attend  the  prayer- 
meeting  in  John-street  liefore  the  service,  which  is  always 
very  sweet  to  my  soul.  Afterwards,  Mr.  Evans  preached  from 
the  words,  Thy  gentleness  hath  made  me  great.  In  the  evening 
we  sat  round  the  table  of  our  dying  Lord.  I  had  not  tliat 
clear  view  of  my  Beloved  I  am  sometimes  favoured  with. 
The  subject  of  tlie  discourse  was  the  command  of  Joshua  to 
the  IsraeHtes  to  go  in  and  possess  the  land.  Mr.  E.  dwelt 
miich  on  the  freshness  of  the  gift,  and  the  fulness  of  the  good 
land ;  and  showed  how  many  stood  but  on  its  borders,  and  did 
not  enter  in.  He  spoke  of  Canaan  being  a  type  of  the  king- 
dom of  God  in  this  world ;  that  there  were  not  two  kingdoms, 
but  one,  part  on  earth  and  part  in  heaven,  as  Christ  says,  The 
kingdom  of  God  is  ivithin  you.  At  the  new  birth  the  believer 
enters  into  this  kingdom,  and  becomes  a  subject.  He  was 
very  full  and  sweet  in  encouraging  the  timid  Christian  to  go 
fully  into  this  good  land,  and  enjoy  the  rich  blessings  that  are 
for  him." 

"  Another  sabbath  is  passed.  I  could  only  attend  one 
service.  The  text  was  from  Genesis  xxiv.  53  :  Wilt  thou  go 
with  this  man  f  And  she  said,  I  will  go.  He  was  very  ex- 
cellent ;  but  as  Mr.  Whitmore  said,  he  did  not  open  the  casket 
enough,  and  speak  quite  so  much  of  Christ  as  he  might  have 
done.  On  Tuesday  morning  I  heard  Mr.  Wilkinson  at  the 
Bank.  Genesis  xxi.  3.  It  was  full  of  Christ,  and  so  refresh- 
ing and  encouraging.     Remember,  my  dear  O ,  the  more 

your  sermons  are  filled  with  Christ,  from  first  to  last,  the  more 
will  Christ  honour  your  ministry.  There  is  no  preaching  hke 
it.  Never  be  afraid  of  not  finding  something  new  to  say  of 
Him.  The  Holy  Ghost  wiU  supply  you  with  matter  as  you 
go  on.  Never  doubt  it,  never  fear.  The  whole  Bible  points 
to  Christ,  and  you  must  make  it  all  bear  upon  the  same  sub- 
ject— Christ  the  sum  and  substance  of  the  whole.  In  Him, 
God  and  the  sinner  meet,  and  they  can  meet  nowhere  else. 
All  the  promises  are  in  Christ  Jesus,  and  we  must  get  into 
Christ  before  we  can  get  at  the  promises  ;  and  then  they  are 
all  yea  and  amen  to  us." 

TO    HER    MOTHER. 

".  .  .  .  I  often  think  how  mysterious  are  the  ways  of  God. 
It  is  our  mercy,  however,  to  know  at  all  times  that  He  is  di- 
recting our  steps,  and  that  not  a  circumstance  in  our  lives  but 


116  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    M4RY   WINSLOW. 

is  included  in  the  ererlasting  covenant  that  is  ordered  in  all 
things  and  sure.  I  feel  your  society  would  add  much  to  my 
happiness,  I  often  have  so  much  to  say  to  you.  But  oh,  what 
a  mercy  that  we  both  have  Jesus  to  open  our  hearts  to  !  It 
is  a  great  thing  to  be  helped  to  be  satisfied  with  God's  deal- 
ings and  ways,  and  not  to  dictate  to  Him,  even  in  our  minds, 
what  we  conceive  would  be  better  for  us.  It  is  not  change  of 
place  or  circumstances,  but  Christ  alone  that  can  make  us  truly 
happy  here  and  hereafter,  God  would  have  us  cease  from 
these  things,  and  live  upon  Him  alone  for  our  enjoyments. 

Mr. is  fast  declining,  and  seems  to  have  to  make  a  fresh 

acquaintance  with  Jesus.  A  cold,  intellectual  faith,  a  mere 
assent  to  the  gospel,  will  not  stand  in  a  dying  hour.  We  want 
something  more." 

"Yesterday  I  heard  a  precious  sermon  from  Mr.  Evans, 
from  Rev.  i.  8,  showing,  throughout  the  whole,  that  Jesus 
Christ  is  the  omnipotent  God,  '  the  Almighty.'  It  was  grand, 
it  was  sublime.  I  trust  I  felt  something  of  the  convincing 
power  of  the  truth,  that  this  omnipotent  Being  was  my  precious 
Jesus,  in  whom  I  trust,  and  on  whom  I  daily  depend  for  all  I 
need  for  time  and  for  eternity." 

TO    HER    CHILDREN. 

" ....  I  look  upon more  in  the  light  of  a  backshder, 

and  have  a  more  favourable  opinion  of  him  than  his  family 
have,  although  he  is  in  a  most  miserable  state  for  a  Christian 
to  be  in.  But  let  him  that  thinketh  he  standeth^  take  heed  lest  he 
fall^  is  an  admonition  that  should  cause  us  to  look  narrowly  to 
our  own  way,  and  not  cast  the  first  stone  at  a  fallen  brother, 
but  rather  pray  for  such  a  one.  Beware,  my  dear,  dear  chil- 
dren, of  the  first  declension  from  Christ.  Examine  your  hearts, 
and  bring  them  daily,  yea  hourly,  to  Jesus,  with  all  that  you 
find  evil  there  ;  and  He  will  subdue  it,  and  give  you  the  vic- 
tory. Never  sit  down  to  reason  with  your  own  heart,  for  it  is 
deceitful ;  but  fly  to  your  true,  your  tried  Friend,  and  He  will 
never  disappoint  nor  deceive  you.  Never  neglect  private 
prayer ;  and  plead  hard  with  Jesus  for  a  constant  and  abiding 
spirit  of  prayer,  so  that  you  can  lift  up  your  heart  to  Him 
wherever  you  are,  or  in  whatever  you  may  be  engaged.  Plead 
much  for  the  promised  indwelling  of  the  Holy  Ghost.  Be 
cautious  of  grieving  this  most  blessed  Guest  of  your  souls ;  and 
when  you  do,  go  immediately  to  Christ,  and  He  will  wash  it 


LETTERS  TO  HER  CHILDREN.  llT 

all  away.  Avoid  light,  trifling  professors  of  religion ;  their 
influence  will  be  as  poison  to  your  souls.  Be  very  cautious 
to  whom  you  open  your  heart.  Make  no  one  your  confidant 
but  Jesus.  Oh,  commune  with  Him  of  all  that  is  in  your 
heart.  If  you  are  wounded,  go  and  tell  Christ.  If  you  are  in 
need,  go  and  tell  Christ, — the  silver  and  the  gold  are  His.  If 
you  are  in  trouble,  go  and  tell  Christ,  and  He  will  deliver  you 
out  of  it,  and  you  shall  glorify  Him.  Live  upon  Hira  as  little 
children  would  live  upon  a  dear,  kind,  and  tender  father.  Oh, 
how  happily  will  you  then  pass  on  your  way !  If  at  any  time 
you  are  in  perplexity  or  difficulty,  through  your  own  impru- 
dence or  otherwise,  go  not  to  an  arm  of  flesh,  nor  sit  down  to 
consider  how  you  are  to  obtain  deliverance ;  but  go  directly  to 
Jesus,  and  tell  Him  all,  all ;  and  He  will  appear  for  you,  and 
bring  you  out  of  all,  by  suggesting  to  your  minds  the  right 
means  to  be  used,  and  following  them  with  His  blessing.  Oh, 
I  beseech  you  to  do  this,  and  may  the  Lord  incline  you  to  do 
so  for  His  name's  sake  !     Amen  and  amen." 

TO    ONE    OF    HER    SONS. 

"How  is  it  with  your  soul  and  body  to-day,  my  dear  child? 
I  trust  you  feel  Christ  very  near  and  increasingly  precious.  I 
felt  much  comfort  to-day  while  pleading  with  many  tears  for 
}ou.  I  believe  the  Lord  heard,  and  will  graciously  answer.  I 
seldom  lift  up  my  heart  to  God,  but  you  are  present  to  my 
mind,  morning,  noon,  and  night.  May  He  hold  you  continu- 
ally in  the  hollow  of  His  hand,  and  make  you  a  rich  blessing 
whenever  He  calls  you  to  stand  up  in  His  name." 

Elevated  as  were  at  times  her  spiritual  feelings,  it  will  ap- 
pear from  the  following  that  she  was  subject  to  those  changes 
and  depressions  which  more  or  less  mark  the  experience  of  all 
the  Lord's  people.  And  yet  it  was  a  characteristic  of  her 
faith,  that  in  her  gloomiest  depressions,  and  in  her  deepest 
trials,  she  never  lost  sight  of  her  interest  in  the  unchangeable 
covenant.  That  covenant  was  her  sheet-anchor  in  every  storm. 
She  knew  that  God  might  vary  His  dispensations,  but  could 
not  change  in  His  love.  She  learned  to  judge  of  Him,  not  by 
His  providence,  but  by  His  word ;  by  what  He  said  rather 
than  by  what  Ho  did ;  and  tliis  kept  her  soul  confiding  and 
serene  amidst  the  fluctuations  of  hope  and  the  waves  of  sorrow. 
One  trait,  however,  of  her  Christianity  we  must  not  overlook. 
She  was  never  satisfied  to  remain  in  a  sluggish  state  of  soul, 


118  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

or  to  walk  beneath  the  veiHngs  of  the  divine  presence.  She 
arose  and  "went  about  the  city,  in  the  streets  and  in  the 
broadways,  seeking  Him  whom  her  soul  loved,"  nor  rested 
until  she  found  Him.  The  following  extracts,  illustrating  this, 
are  from  letters  addressed  to  one  of  her  sons : — 

"29th. — I  feel  very  low  in  my  soul,  and  need  a  plunge  in 
the  divine  life.  I  have  not,  since  that  precious  revival,  felt  so 
barren  and  so  listless  as  of  late.  But  God  knows  my  heart, 
how  I  long  after  Him,  and  how  far  I  am  from  being  happy  or 
satisfied  in  such  a  frame.  How  miserable  it  is  to  walk  with- 
out the  sun  !  But  in  the  darkest  hour  the  Christian  has,  he 
may  safely  rely  on  the  faithfulness  of  Him  with  whom  is  no 
shadow  of  turning.  This  is  my  comfort — Jesus  is  still  the 
same.  But  I  want  to  walk  closer  to  Him,  and  to  enjoy  the 
smiles  of  His  blessed  face.  "What  is  the  world,  or  ten  thousand 
worlds,  to  me,  if  He  withdraw  His  heavenly  countenance  ? 
Nothing  under  heaven  can  compensate  for  the  loss  of  this. 
True,  we  are  to  walk  by  faith ;  but  I  always  fear  something  is 
wrong  in  us  when  Christ  retires,  even  for  a  day  or  an  hour.  I 
have  been  trying  to  examine  myself,  and  can  see  nothing  but 
evil ;  therefore  I  must  turn  afresh  to  Christ,  and  one  believing 
glance  of  that  all-sufficient  Atonement  will  dispel  every  cloud, 
and  fill  my  soul  with  joy  and  comfort.  How  I  covet  the 
broken  heart  and  the  contrite  spirit !  I  would  rather  seek  my 
Saviour,  sorrowing  every  step  I  take,  than  feel  a  dull,  hard, 
insensible  heart.  Jesus  has  died — Jesus  is  risen — and  Jesus 
is  in  very  deed  at  the  right  hand  of  God  exalted,  and  there 
ever  lives  to  plead  the  cause  of  His  poor,  tried,  tempted  fol- 
lowers. I  have  been  thinking  of  the  worldling's  happiness. 
It  never  satisfies — affords  no  real  enjoyment — ^it  does  not  reach 
the  soul.  Ten  thousand  worlds  could  not  satisfy  me,  now  that 
I  have  tasted  the  unspeakably  precious  love  of  Christ.  Well, 
then,  let  us  hold  fast  our  confidence,  and  still  look  upward ; 
and  when  we  cannot  run,  let  us  walk ;  and  when  we  cannot 
walk,  let  us  creep  after  him — but  still,  go  forward.  Better  to 
follow  Him  as  a  Mary  did,  weeping,  than  be  satisfied  without 
Him.  Oh,  that  we  may  press  on,  remembering  Jesus'  eye  is 
ever  upon  us,  although  we  may  not  always  be  able  to  discern 
Him." 

"  I  am  convinced  that  much  intercourse  with  lukewarm  pro- 
fessors does  great  injury  to  the  believer,  for  which  reason  I 
longed  to  return  home  once  more.     Oh,  avoid  such !     Light 


LETTERS   TO    HER   SON.  119 

and  trifling  conversation  acts  as  a  poison  to  the  life  of  God  in 
the  soul.  It  grieves  the  Spirit,  and  He  withdraws  His  sen- 
sible influence.  May  the  Lord  keep  us  from  evil,  that  it 
grieve  us  not,  and  restore  constantly  to  us  the  joys  of  His  sal- 
vation." 

"  I  felt  refreshed  on  Tuesday  evening  at  the  lecture.  How 
needful  are  the  means  of  grace,  if  we  wish  to  thrive.  I  hope 
you  will  encourage  meetings  for  praj'er,  my  beloved  child. 
May  God  give  you  wisdom  in  all  things,  and  grace  to  do  His 
most  holy  will !  Let  me  entreat  you  to  look  to  him  con- 
tinually, for  counsel  to  direct  in  little  as  well  as  in  great  mat- 
ters. Great  things  often  spring  out  of  little  things.  I  perceive 
you  have  forgotten  '  Rutherford's  Letters.'  I  wish  you  had 
taken  them.  Keep  to  the  old  divines.  Modern  divinity  is 
very  shallow — has  very  little  of  Christ  and  experience.  May 
God  give  you  a  spiritual  appetite  and  deep  experience  in  the 
things  pertaining  to  His  kingdom !  Oh,  that  we  might  both 
be  led  to  sit  more  constantly  at  the  feet  of  Jesus,  looking  up, 
like  little  children,  into  His  face  to  catch  His  smile  and  watch 
His  eye — to  see  what  He  would  have  us  to  do,  seeking  no- 
where else  for  comfort  and  guidance  but  in  Him.  In  a  short 
period,  and  we  shall  have  done  with  everything  but  God  ;  and 
oh,  that  we  may  have  chiefly  to  do  with  Him  now." 

"  How  sweet  to  feel  that  all  the  kindness  and  tenderness  of 
the  creature  flow  first  from  Christ.  If  this  be  so,  the  creature 
may  change,  but  Jesus  never.  In  all  your  perplexities,  rest  in 
the  Loirl,  and  ivait  jMtiently  for  him.  It  is  in  a  patient  wait- 
ing for  Him  and  not  in  an  impatient  dictating  to  Him,  that  He 
blesses.  Does  the  burthen  of  your  work  press  heavily  upon 
you  ?  Try  and  think  it  not  a  burthen — Christ  has  borne  a 
heavier  one  for  you.  Count  it  an  honour ;  and  be  assured 
that  this  is  a  trial  of  your  faith,  and  to  lead  you  to  know  more 
of  your  own  heart  and  more  of  the  heart  of  Jesus.  The  re- 
ligion of  Christ  I  more  and  more  see  to  be  a  divine,  a  glorious 
reality.  It  is  no  cunningly-devised  fable ;  it  is  truth — con- 
firmed, settled,  grounded  in  the  heart  and  soul  by  the  power 
of  the  Holy  Ghost.  Let  us  not,  then,  be  faint  and  weary 
because  of  the  way.  It  is  the  Lord's  way.  Thorny  and 
steep  though  may  be  the  ascent,  when  we  reach  the  summit 
we  shall  be  well  repaid  for  all  our  labour." 

"  Your  dear  letter  has  been  a  source  of  much  comfort  to 
me,  and  this  morning  particularly  was  much  blessed  to  my 


120  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

soul.  As  you  say,  '  What  a  blessing  it  is  to  realize  the  Being 
of  God.''  I  feel  that  He  is,  and  that  He  is  all  around  us — 
closer  to  us  than  we  are  to  ourselves ;  for  in  Him  we  live,  and 
move,  and  have  our  heing.  I  often  awake  in  the  morning  with 
strong  unbelief,  attended  with  such  a  feehug  of  despondency 
as  throws  a  gloominess  over  all  my  prospects.  How  dig- 
honouring  is  this  to  God !  I  fall  upon  my  knees,  and  in  a  mo- 
ment it  is  gone.  I  see  the  face  of  Christ,  and  his  loving, 
compassionate  look  disperses  the  cloud,  and  all  is  peace.  This? 
morning,  your  sweet  view^  of  God  refreshed  me  while  in 
prayer,  and  drew  forth  my  soul  towards  Him  in  adoring  grat- 
itude." 

"Last  evening,  at  the  church-meeting,  in  relating  the  ex- 
perience of  a  child  of  God,  Mr.  Evans  spoke  of  the  individ- 
ual's earnest  wish  to  be  honest  ivith  God.  Oh,  I  thought, 
that  God  would  make  me  honest  with  Him ;  that  He  would 
give  me  a  holy,  upright,  honest  dealing — having  no  conceal- 
ments, no  reservations  !  A  thorough  cleansing  from  all  hypoc- 
risy, vain-glory,  and  hated  emulation — a  wanting  to  be  thought 
something,  when  we  are  less  than  nothing !  What  a  chamber 
of  iniquity  is  the  heart,  all  hidden  and  unknown,  until  God  in 
mercy  shows  it  to  us,  as  we  are  able  to  bear  the  disclosure ! 
This  is  ploughing  up  the  fallow  ground  afresh." 

"  I  have  never  felt  God  the  Father  so  dear  and  endearing 
as  of  late.  To  say,  'My  father,' — to  come  to  Him  as  to  a 
father  who  loves  and  pities  you,  and  can  and  will  do  all  need- 
ful good, — how  sweet !  But  while  He  sends  the  trial  until  it 
accomplishes  the  end  for  which  it  was  designed,  yet  he  wall 
give  all-sufficient  grace  while  it  lasts.  I  would  gladly  have 
you  with  me,  if  it  were  the  Lord's  will ;  but  our  happiness 
depends  not  upon  change  of  circumstances  or  of  place,  but 
upon  a  submission  of  our  wills  to  the  will  of  God — a  complete 
surrender  of  every  desire  and  wish  to  Him  who  is  acquainted 
with  what  is  best  for  us." 

"Feb.  27th. — This  is  my  birthday.  This  morning,  before 
rising,  I  had  such  a  precious  manifestation  of  love  poured  into 
my  soul  by  the  God  of  love,  that  my  heart  was  broken  with 
deep  contrition  and  repentance,  accompanied  with  a  holy  long- 
ing to  be  more  swallowed  up  in  God — to  be  more  like  Him — 
more  wholly  and  devotedly  His,  than  I  have  ever  been.  My 
heart  seemed  opened  to  God,  and  His  heart  opened  to  me.  I 
felt  such  a  spirit  of  praise  as  I  could  scarcely  contain.     What 


LETTERS  TO   HER  SON.  121 

shall  I  say  to  these  things  ?  I  am  Christ's  and  Christ  is  mine. 
He  causes  me  to  know  it ;  I  feel  it  to  be  so  without  a  doubt, 
or  even  the  shadow  of  a  doubt.  And  yet  this  very  thing  it 
is  that  humbles  me  in  the  dust  before  Him.  I  weep  that  I 
am  such  a  sinner,  while  I  stand  in  wonder  and  astonishment 
that  God  can  love,  and  does  love,  such  a  one  as  I ;  and  having 
loved  me  in  time,  will  love  me  through  eternity.  Oh,  help 
me  to  praise  Him !  Jesus  is  mine — Jesus  is  yours ;  and  we 
shall  live  together  to  praise  Him  and  cast  our  crowns  at  His 
feet." 

"I  opened  my  Bible  this  morning,  and  my  eye  rested  upon 
Nehemiah,  i.  11  :  O  Lord,  I  beseech  thee,  let  noio  thine  ear  he 
attentive  to  the  prayer  of  thy  servant,  and  to  the  prayer  of  thy 
servants,  who  desire  to  fear  thy  name  ;  and  prosper,  I  pray  thee, 
thy  servant  this  day,  and  grant  him  mercy  in  the  sight  of  this 
man.  It  was  quite  a  season  of  reviving  to  my  soul,  and  my 
heart  was  made  glad,  for  Nehemiah's  God  is  my  God,  and 
your  God,  too,  beloved ;  and  His  ear  is  ever  open  to  our  cry. 
And  yet,  when  the  Lord  was  about  to  answer  Nehemiah's 
prayer,  he  was  afraid  through  unbelief  What  a  good  and 
gracious  God  He  is,  to  bear  with  us  as  He  does !  Our  wicked, 
soul-destroying,  God-dishonouring  unbelief,  keeps  us  grovelling 
in  the  dust,  when  we  ought  to  be  soaring  on  the  eagle-wing  of 
gratitude  and  love." 

"  How  needful  it  is  to  have  a  Guide  who  knows  the  end 
from  the  beginning,  and  if  we  ask  counsel  from  Him,  He  will 
give  it,  only  watching  our  deceitful  hearts,  that  we  do  not 
make  up  our  minds,  and  then  go  to  God  for  counsel.  I  be- 
lieve there  are  many  Christians  w^ho  are  walking  in  a  smooth 
path,  and  have  nothing  outwardly  to  contend  with,  who  would 
be  thankful  to  be  tried  ;  for  they  feel  that  if  they  have  faith 
it  has  never  been  tested,  and  are  sometimes  doubting,  because 
they  have  never  been  afflicted  as  God's  people  usually  are. 
They  have  never  been  led  to  feel  deeply  the  abounding  iniquity 
of  their  own  hearts ;  and  while  they  read.  If  ye  he  without 
chastisement,  whereof  all  are  j^drtakei's,  then  are  ye  hastards  and 
not  so)is,  they  tremble  lest  they  should  only  have  a  name  to 
live,  while  they  will  be  found  wanting  in  the  last  day.  Oh, 
that  God  would  make  us  grateful  that  it  is  as  well  with  us  as 
it  is  ;  and  that  the  little  trials  we  have  may  be  so  sanctified 
as  to  draw  us  near  to  Christ,  and  make  Him  more  precious 
than  ever  I " 
6 


122  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WTNSLOW. 

"The  difficulties  aud  trials  connected  with  your  holy  office 
as  a  minister  of  the  everlasting  gospel,  give  me  many  errands 
to  the  throne  of  grace,  where  1  lay  your  case  l:>efore  the  Lord, 
and  plead  with  many  tears  on  your  behalf.  But  I  pray  to  be 
kept,  at  the  same  time,  from  a  spirit  of  dictation.  Our  heav- 
enly Father  knows  better  how  to  control  and  direct  our  con- 
cerns than  v,'e  know  ourselves.  Oh,  to  be  among  the  number 
who  wholly  trust  in  the  Lord!  What  a  perpetiial  warfare  is 
the  Christian's  course !  Many  of  God's  saints  talk  to  me  as  if 
I  had  got  above  these  things;  but  oh,  they  little  know  that  I 
am  as  poor  as  poverty  itself,  and  am  obliged  to  draw  all  my 
supplies  from  the  same  source  with  themselves,  and  that  with- 
out Christ  I  can  do  nothing.  Indwelling  sin  is  my  daily  cross, 
compared  with  which  every  other  appears  liglit." 

"Nothing  but  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost  can  convert 
the  soul.  The  word,  and  the  preaching  of  the  word,  pass  for 
nothing,  unless  accompanied  by  the  Holy  Spirit.  It  is  like 
attempting  to  shoot  a  bird  from  a  gun  charged  only  with 
powder.  This  should  give  the  trembling,  doubting  believer 
much  comfort,  and  also  the  more  assured  one ;  for  if  God  has 
begun  His  work  in  the  soul,  God  will  complete  it,  and  all  sin 
cannot  destroy  it.  A  sinner  converted  by  the  Holy  Ghost 
cannot  destroy  himself  He  may  destroy  his  comfort  and 
peace,  and  impair  his  spirituality,  but  his  soul  he  cannot  de- 
stroy, for  Christ  has  redeemed  and  sanctified  it  by  His  blood. 
How  poor  and  contemptible  is  all  the  wisdom  and  talent  of 
man  when  left  to  itself!  Salvation,  from  first  to  last,  is  of 
God.  God  begins  it,  God  carries  it  on,  and  God  will  finish  it 
for  ever.     Blessed  be  His  holy  name  ! " 

"  January  28th. — I  perceive  by  your  letters  that  you  are  often 
depressed.  This  is  natural,  from  the  many  trials  and  difficulties 
connected  with  your  office.  But  you  must  remember  that  you 
are  called  to  endure  hardship  as  a  good  soldier  of  Jesus  Christ ; 
and  must  expect  to  be  tried  and  buffeted  if  you  would  be  an 
experimental  minister  of  the  cross.  And  do  not  forget  He  is 
infinite  in  wisdom,  who  selects  and  orders  all  your  trials  as 
those  best  suited  to  your  case,  and  most  qualified  to  prepare 
you  for  your  work.  Be  assured  no  other  would  have  done. 
May  we  be  more  sanctified  by  what  we  suffer !  I  am  yet  a 
learner,  and  seem  as  if  I  always  required  my  Father's  disci- 
pline. Oh,  for  a  more  subdued  and  weaned  heart  from  all  but 
God!"  .     . 


123 

"  The  more  T  know  of  the  utter  impossibihty  of  the  Chris- 
tian, after  he  is  a  Christian,  to  keep  himself  for  one  hour,  yea, 
for  one  moment,  the  more  deeply  anxious  I  feel  for  myself,  and 
for  all  who  profess  the  name  of  Christ.  Those  may  be  ready 
to  say,  who  are  but  little  acquainted  with  the  deceitfulness  of 
their  own  hearts,  Is  thy  servant  a  dog  that  he  should  do  this  f 
but  the  longer  we  are  in  this  warfare  the  more  jealous  we 
should  be  of  ourselves.       It  was  the  prayer  of  David,  Hold 

thou  me  up  and  I  shall  be  safe.     Tender  love  to   dear . 

Tell  her  I  have  never  been  so  firmly  convinced  as  of  late  of 
the  absolute  necessity  of  the  holy,  wise  walk  of  a  minister's 
wife.  It  is  my  constant  prayer  that  God  will  fully  qualify 
her  for  her  high  and  solemn  position.  One  consideration  is  of 
importance.  A  minister's  wife  should  never  allow  her  hus- 
band's mind  to  be  harassed  with  the  anxieties  and  perplexities 
of  domestic  concerns.  Every  little  difficulty  and  annoyance 
of  that  kind  should  be  kept  quite  from  his  knowledge.  Not 
long  since,  I  was  much  pained,  when  on  a  visit  to  a  dear  man 
of  God,  while  listening  to  his  many  conflicts,  his  wife,  a  Chris- 
tian woman,  too,  entered,  and  commenced  a  tedious  detail  of 
a  difficulty  she  had  had  with  one  of  the  domestics.  Poor  man ! 
he  sighed,  and  that  sigh  conveyed  a  volume  of  meaning  to  my 
mind." 

"  Unbelief  is  the  strongest  enemy  we  have  to  contend  with. 
How  it  tries  and  harasses  the  believer  every  step  of  his  event- 
ful journey  !  It  engenders  in  him  often  the  basest  ingratitude, 
and  causes  him  to  mourn  when  it  is  his  duty  and  privilege  to 
rejoice.  How  much  too  it  curtails  all  his  mercies ;  for  it  is 
now,  as  in  the  days  of  Christ,  Be  it  unto  you  according  to  your 
faith — so  that  little  faith  secures  but  little  comfort,  and  less 
enjoyment.     Oh,  for  a  stronger  confidence  in  God  !" 

As  a  means  of  embodying  and  giving  practical  effect  to  the 
holy  sympathy  of  Christian  mothers,  perhaps  no  institution  has 
been  found  more  suitable,  or  has  been  more  honoured  with  the 
Divine  blessing,  than  the  "  Maternal  Association."  The  influ- 
ence of  pious  mothers,  silent,  yet  mighty,  has  become  almost 
proverbial.  How  few  training  for  the  Christian  ministry  in 
the  schools  of  the  prophets,  or  as  settled  pastors  are  cultivating 
successfully  the  vineyards  at  home,  or  on  heathen  shores  are 
honoured  missionaries  of  the  cross,  would  be  found,  on  inquiry, 
who  had  not  been  blest  with  godly  mothers  !  And  of  these 
how  fewer  still  the  number  who  would  not  testify  that  it  was 


124  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

that  mother's  hand  that  first  guided  their  infant  footsteps  to 
the  Saviour!  It  was  here,  in  the  bosom  of  the  Christian 
family,  the  tiny  seed  was  sown  which,  in  long  after  years,  and 
when,  perhaps,  the  hand  that  dropped  it  was  mouldering  in  the 
grave,  struck  deep  its  roots,  and  extended  wide  its  branches, 
blessing  the  world  with  its  fruit,  and  beautifying  the  church 
witli  its  comeliness.  It  was  here,  in  the  pious  home,  the 
latent  desire  to  be  a  Christian  was  inspired,  the  first  thought 
of  being  a  minister  was  conceived,  and  the  purpose  of  a  life  for 
Grod  was  formed.  Oh,  let  Christian  parents  awake  to  a  con- 
viction of  their  mighty,  almost  creative  power !  Few  were 
more  sensible  of  this  than  Mrs.  Winslow,  and  few  more  hon- 
oured than  she  in  the  right  direction  of  her  influence.  Com- 
pelled by  her  removal  from  town,  to  withdraw  from  attendance 
at  the  meetings  of  the  John-street  Chapel  Maternal  Associa- 
tion, yet  cherishing  for  its  object  an  undiminished  and  prayer- 
ful interest,  she  addressed  the  following  letter,  designed  to 
encourage  her  in  this  good  work,  to  the  former  wife  of  her 
pastor : — 

"...  And  so  you  are  discouraged.  Trials  and  difficulties 
many,  faith  tried,  and  only  three  met !  Did  you  expect  to 
undertake  a  work  for  Christ  and  get  on  smoothly,  while  there 
is  everything  within  and  without  to  oppose  it  ?  Did  you  ex- 
pect faith  would  not  be  tried  in  this  matter  ?  Faith  takes 
hold  of  the  strength  and  power  of  God,  and  looks  alone  to 
Him.  You  were  looking  to  your  little  feeble  band  of  three, 
although  you  were  within  the  number  Christ  has  promised  to 
bless.  In  a  country  place  in  America,  a  few  Christian  females 
engaged  to  meet  to  pray  for  a  blessing  on  their  families ;  but 
after  a  while  it  declined,  and  continued  to  do  so  until  only  two 
came.  "  Shall  Ave  give  up  ?'  was  the  question.  They  thought 
of  God's  faithfulness  to  His  promise,  of  His  power  and  good- 
ness, and  resolved  to  go  on.  They  met.  these  two  only,  again 
and  again.  They  pleaded  the  promise,  and  encouraged  each 
other  by  their  prayers.  At  last  the  aiisioer  came.  God  tried 
their  faith,  Jesus  interceded,  and  it  had  not  failed.  Some  who 
had  left  them  returned,  others  followed  ;  the  place  of  prayer 
was  soon  filled.  The  Lord  poured  out  His  Spirit  on  them,  and 
they  prayed  in  earnest  until  the  blessing  was  given.  The 
church  felt  the  holy  influence  ;  their  children  at  home  began 
to  inquire  what  they  must  do  to  be  saved ;  the  mothers  direct- 
ed them  to  Jesus,  and  prayed  on.     God  in  very  deed  bowed 


LETTER   TO   THE    MATERNAL    ASSOCIATION".  125 

the  heavens,  and  came  down  in  their  midst  to  bless  them. 
Many  of  their  unconverted  children  and  husbands  were  led  to 
submit  to  Christ,  and  the  whole  church  shared  in  this  remark- 
able revival.  Dear  sister,  take  courage  and  look  up.  God 
loves  to  hear  your  prayers.  Did  the  mothers  in  John-street 
Chapel  but  see  their  children  standing  on  the  edge  of  an  awful 
precipice,  and  know  that  none  but  God  could  prevent  their 
destruction,  would  they  not  cry  day  and  night  to  Him  ?  But 
what  can  be  compared  to  the  eternal  death  that  awaits  them, 
if  they  die  unconverted  ?  And  will  they  not  meet  together 
for  united  prayer,  that  their  dear  children  may  escape  from  the 
wrath  to  come?  Again  I  say  unto  you,  if  two  of  you  shall 
agree  on  earth  as  touching  anything  that  they  shall  ask,  it  shall 
he  done  for  them  of  my  Father  luhich  is  in  heaven.  Matt,  xviii. 
19.  Thi^  is  a  promise  worth  millions  of  gold  and  silver,  and 
this  promise  you  have  to  plead.  May  God  help  us  to  give 
full  credence  to  His  word,  and  deal  with  Him  as  one  who 
cannot  but  do  all  He  has  promised,  because  He  is  God!  In 
proportion  as  we  feel  the  infinite  value  of  the  immortal  soul, 
we  shall  feel  anxious  for  its  salvation.  Now,  beloved,  expect 
difficulties,  expect  opposition,  even  from  your  own  heart;  but 
you  have  the  Lord  on  your  side.  Jesus  is  waiting  to  be  gra- 
cious. The  Holy  Spirit  is  waiting  to  do  all  that  He  has  en- 
gaged to  do ;  and  angels  are  w^aiting  to  rejoice  over  uncon- 
verted sinners,  in  answer  to  your  prayers.  We  shall  never 
fully  know,  until  we  get  to  heaven,  the  mighty  power  of  im- 
portunate prayer  with  God.  If  I  knew  your  time  of  conven- 
ing, I  would  unite  my  poor  prayers  with  yours.  I  am  earnest 
on  this  subject,  knowing  the  great  blessings  that  have  attended 
such  efforts.  Go  forward  in  the  strength  and  power  of  Jeho- 
vah-Jesus, and  God  must  and  will  bless  you." 


CHAPTER    VII. 

Mrs.  Winslow  was  never  more  at  home,  and,  we  might 
add,  never  happier — for  her  happiness  and  her  Lord's  glory 
were  one  and  inseparable — than  when  administering  counsel 
to  the  perplexed,  or  comfort  to  the  afflicted.  Her  own  natu- 
rally strong  judgment  early  brought  into  exercise,  and  schooled 
for  the  greater  part  of  her  life  in  adversity,  she  was  thus  emi- 
nently fitted,  from  the  rich  stores  of  her  own  experience,  to 
administer  to  the  exigencies  of  others — advising  those  whose 
path  was  intricate,  and  comforting  those  who  were  in  any  sor- 
row, by  the  comforts  with  which  she  herself  had  been  comforted 
of  God.  Hence  so  many  of  the  letters  which  appear  in  this 
volume  are  addressed  to  persons  in  circumstances  of  trial  and 
affliction. 

The  bereavement  of  her  pastor,  by  the  removal  of  his  wife, 
under  circumstances  of  such  painful  interest,  would  naturally 
call  forth  the  expression  of  her  deepest  and  most  tender  sym- 
pathy. During  the  week  which  intervened  between  the  sud- 
den attack  and  its  fatal  termination  she  was  scarcely  absent 
from  the  scene  of  anxiety ;  and  one  whole  night  was  spent  in 
prayer  with  Mr.  Evans,  in  the  vestry,  over  which  lay  the  suf- 
fering object  of  their  long  midnight  wrestlings.  We  find  in 
her  journal  the  following  references  to  this  mournful  event. 

"May  5th,  1831. — Since  I  last  wrote,  the  Lord  has  taken 
my  dear  friend,  Mrs.  Evans,  after  little  more  than  a  week's 
illness.  His  presence  was  with  her,  and  He  most  graciously 
manifested  His  love  towards  her  in  carrying  her  through  the 
dark  valley.  She  died  in  the  triumph  of  faith.  Her  dear 
husband  was  almost  overwhelmed  by  the  suddenness  of  the 
stroke,  and  staggered  under  his  irreparable  loss.  But  the 
Lord  who  spake  such  sweet  peace  to  his  wife,  supported  the 
bereaved  husband,  and  enabled  him  to  say,  Thy  luill  he  done  ! 
It  was  a  shock  almost  sufficient  to  overcome  nature;  but  God 
is  all-sufficient  at  all  times  for  His  saints." 
(126) 


DEATH   OF   MRS.    EVANS.  127 

"The  last  time  I  saw  our  dear  departed  sister,  Mrs.  Evans, 
was  on  the  day  she  died.  When  I  entered  the  room,  she  held 
out  her  hand,  and,  taking  mine,  said  some  most  affectionate 
things ;  for  her  whole  heart  seemed  dissolved  into  love.  I 
never  saw  such  a  death.  Her  countenance  was  full  of  holy, 
joyful  anticipation.  Her  soul  seemed  filled  with  Christ.  She 
said,  with  uncommon  energy  of  manner,  '  See,  dear  sister,  how 
good  is  the  Lord  !  Jesus  is  most  precious.  Christ  has  so 
blessedly  manifested  Himself  to  me.  He  has  been  with  me 
through  all  the  operations ; '  and  then  looking  earnestly  into 
mv  face,  said  :  '  I  have  known  more  of  Christ  in  this  week  than 
I  have  known  in  all  my  whole  life  put  together.  And  now,' 
she  continued,  with  such  a  sweet  smile,  '  I  am  going  to  Him, 
He  has  prepared  a  place  for  me,'  'Yes,'  I  rephed,  'and  He 
will  come  and  receive  you  to  himself,  according  to  His  own 
word.'  After  a  few  words  of  prayer,  I  left  her,  with  a  sweet 
hope  of  meeting  her  at  the  right  hand  of  God.  Death,  in  her 
case,  was  divested  of  its  sting  and  the  grave  of  its  victory,  and 
Jesus  enabled  her  most  blessedly  to  triumph  over  both." 

In  one  of  her  letters  to  her  family,  she  refers  to  the  grace 
which  sustained  her  afflicted  pastor : — 

"  Dear  W\\  Evans  will  be  again  in  his  pulpit  on  Tuesday 
evening.  He  is  now  in  the  country.  I  dined  at  Hampstead 
the  Friday  before  we  went ;  he  was  very  much  supported,  but 
still  greatly  afflicted.  He  came  to  me  on  the  Sunday  night 
before  the  funeral,  I  heard  his  voice  below,  and  ran  down  to 
meet  him.  Finding  I  was  alone,  he  dismissed  the  carriage 
and  came  up.  He  sat  down,  and  gave  vent  to  his  feelings. 
We  had  much  conversation,  and  God  did  bless  it  to  the  com- 
fort of  his  dear  servant.  I  said,  '  God  will  restore  peace  to 
your  soul.'  He  replied,  '  He  has  done  it,  and  within  this  house.' 
He  left  me,  composed  and  comfortable.  He  told  me  since,  that 
he  shall  never  forget  that  spot,  to  the  day  of  his  death." 

Soon  after  this  event,  she  visited  her  eldest  son,  who  was 
then  resident  at  Cambridge.     From  thence  she  writes : — 

"  I  had  a  pleasant  journey  to  this  place,  with  only  two 
ladies  inside.  We  had  some  agreeable  and,  I  hope,  profitable 
conversation,  althougli  they  were  both,  I  could  see,  bnt  moral- 
ists, depending  upon  their  doing  and  their  not  doing.  Yet 
they  listened  very  attentively  while  I  endeavoured  to  show 
them  the  cobweb  garment  of  such  a  profession.  They  gave 
me  their  respectful  attention,  but  I  could  clearly  perceive  they 


128  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW 

did  not  at  all  understand  me ;  so  I  left  them  as  I  found  them. 
Perhaps  they  may  think  more  about  it  some  time  hence.     On 

arriving  at  the  house,  dear  E met  me  in  the  parlour,  and 

instantly  after  Mrs.  C ,  with  her  good  husband,  in  his  gig, 

at  a  little  distance.  And  now  I  am  seated  in  the  sweet  little 
drawing-room,  surrounded  with  shrubbery,  and  everything 
looking  delightfully  refreshing  to  the  eye.  You  might  fancy 
yourself  twenty  miles  in  the  country,  it  is  so  encircled  with 

trees.     In  a  short  time  T made  his  appearance,  in  cap  and 

gown,  looking  very  well.  We  all  went,  in  the  evening,  to 
hear  good  Mr.  Simeon,   and  my  soul  was  sweetly  refreshed 

with  the  simple,  but  precious  truths  of  the  gospel.     G 

took  me  to  some  of  the  colleges ;  but  although  they  are  very 

fine,  I  have  but  little  taste  for  these  things.     Miss  M and 

Mrs.  F called  yesterday.    To-morrow  I  go  to  Haslingfield. 

Dear  Mrs.  C insists  that  my  visit  to  Cambridge  is  to  her." 

Of  the  letters  Avritten  during  her  visit  to  Haslingfield,  where 
she  met  much  that  was  congenial  with  her  taste — a  picturesque 
village,  and  spiritual  and  affectionate  intercourse — only  one  can 
be  found.     It  is  addressed  to  her  bereaved  pastor ; — 

"Haslingfield  Vicarage,  Cambridge,  May  24tli,  1831. 
"  .  .  .  .  I  long  to  know  how  your  mind  is,  and  if  the 
Lord  is  keeping  you  resting  in  the  bosom  of  His  love,  comfort- 
ing and  refreshing  your  soul  by  continual  draughts  from  the 
overflowing  fountain  of  living  waters.  Oh,  how  sweet  it  is  to 
be  kept  in  such  a  position !  Pray  that  I  may  be  kept  in  it.  I 
have  had  some  taste,  and  that  makes  me  long  for  more.  I  am 
staying  a  little  while  with  those  who  truly  love  the  Lord,  and 
whose  works  proclaim  their  love  sincere.  I  see  godliness 
brought  into  daily  practice,  without  ostentation.  These  dear 
friends  do  the  will  of  God  from  the  heart,  and  it  is  their  meat 
and  drink  so  to  do.     May  God  bless  them  more  and  more ! 

Mrs.  C is  a  real  labourer  in  the  cause  of  Christ,  and  Mr. 

C one  of  the  kindest-hearted  and  most  benevolent  beings 

I  ever  met  with.  .  .  .  Oh,  what  a  mercy  to  have  a  throne 
of  grace,  and  a  tender,  compassionate,  loving  Christ  to  go  to 
at  all  times,  and  under  all  circumstances  !  A  large  welcome  ; 
no  frown  to  fear ;  no  distant  look.  Oh,  that  we  all  might  live 
upon  Him,  moment  by  moment !  For  this  reason,  He  takes 
away  our  props,  that  w^e  might  lean  altogether  upon  Himself; 
and  that  is  why  He  has  dealt  with  you,  my  dear  brother  in 


A   TOUCHING   INCIDENT.  129 

affliction.  God  knows,  I  have  loved  you  better  since  the 
Lord  placed  you  in  the  same  furnace  with  myself.  My  heart 
can  feel  all  you  felt.  You  will  at  some  time  or  other  see,  as 
I  have  seen,  that  that  w^as  the  very  thing  you  needed,  and 
wonder  at  the  Lord's  goodness  in  delaying  it  so  long.  Blessed 
be  His  name,  that  He  has  in  a  measure  comforted  you !  and 
be  assured  He  will  fill  the  void  He  has  made,  with  Himself. 
He  took  your  dear  wife  away  to  make  room  for  Himself;  and 
the  place  that  w^as  prepared  was  quite  ready  for  her,  and  she 
was  quite  ready  for  it ;  so  that  all  we  have  to  do  is  to  bow  to 
His  most  blessed  will,  and  fill  up  the  little  span  that  now  re- 
mains for  us  here,  in  doing  the  work  He  has  assigned  us,  and 
be  ready  to  go  home  at  a  moment's  warning.  .  .  .  You 
have  a  double  claim  upon  Him  now ;  make  good  use  of  it,  for 
He  loves  to  have  us  argue  the  point  with  Him.  We  need  not 
fear  being  too  familiar  or  too  troublesome.  The  oftener  we 
come,  the  more  welcome.  Now  I  do  thank  God,  who  has 
blessed  you  with  His  own  Spirit,  or  you  could  not  permit  such 
a  poor  one  as  I  am,  who  have  need  to  be  taught  of  you,  to  talk 
to  you  in  this  way.  I  am  persuaded  you  know  all  this,  and 
oh,  how  much  more  !  But  God  does  often  speak  a  word  of 
comfort  through  his  poor  and  despised  ones,  and  sends  a  mes- 
sage of  love  by  the  mouth  of  a  young  child  to  an  elder  one ; 
and  the  elder  will  be  glad  to  receive  it,  too.  ]\Iay  Jesus  com- 
fort your  heart,  and  give  you  much  of  His  sensible  presence. 
Love  to  dear  C ." 

It  was  during  her  visit  to  Cambridge  that  the  touching  inci- 
dent in  her  Christian  feelings,  mentioned  in  the  following  ex- 
tract, took  place: — 

"I  wrote  to  you  yesterday  ;  but  as  I  was  just  now  reading 
dear  Mr.  Simeon's  Memoir,  I  felt  such  a  gush  of  holy  love, 
even  the  love  of  Christ,  filling  my  heart,  that  it  brought  afresh 
to  my  mind  a  circumstance,  which,  if  you  see  Mr.  Cams,  I 
wish  him  to  know.  I  went  to  hear  Mr.  Carus  one  evening 
when  at  Cambridge.  My  heart  during  the  day  had  been  cold 
and  barren.  I  took  my  seat  in  the  pew,  in  this  wretched 
state  of  soul.  Dear  Mr.  C.  announced  his  text :  /  sat  down 
under  His  shadow  loith  great  delight,  and  his  fruit  luas  siueet  to 
my  taste. — Song  of  Solomon  ii.  3.  His  first  observation  was, 
'These  words  refer  to  Jesus.'  In  a  moment  my  soul  was 
melted,  my  heart  overflowed  w^ith  love:  I  wept.  His  name 
was  as  ointment  poured  forth.     I  coiled  myself  up  in  one  cor- 


130  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

ner  of  the  pew,  and  had  the  most  blessed  season  of  commun- 
ion through  the  whole  service.  What  he  said  of  whom  my 
soul  loved  was  sweet  and  refreshing.  From  that  time  I  have 
never  seen  nor  heard  Mr.  Cams,  but  the  Lord  did,  through 
him,  send  a  rich  blessing  to  my  soul.  Give  my  love  to  him. 
We  shall  soon  meet  where  we  shall  be  all  of  one  mind,  in  a 
brighter,  happier  world,  surrounding  the  throne  of  Him  we 
love.  Blessed  be  God  for  this  prospect !  It  often  causes  the 
dark  cloud  to  withdraw,  and  the  weary  soul  to  take  fresh  cour- 
age, and  press  onward,  and  look  upward.  Blessed  is  the  hope 
of  the  Christian  !  Many  may  be  the  trials  of  his  faith ;  but  I 
believe  the  most  tried  Christian  knows  the  most  lo\nng  heart 
of  the  Saviour.  He  is  a  tried  stone.  Tried  by  the  hand  of  His 
Father ;  tried  by  the  hand  of  justice ;  tried  by  the  wicked,  and 
tried  by  His  saints.  He  tries  the  faith  He  gives.  Had  He 
not  tried  me  in  the  furnace  of  affliction,  my  loss  would  have 
been  immense.  I  thank  Him  for  my  deep,  deep  cup  of  sorrow. 
Whatever  draws  or  drives  us  to  Christ  is  a  blessing.  We  then 
breathe  a  holy,  heavenly  atmosphere,  and  see  the  poverty  of 
all  other  things  to  make  us  happy  here  or  hereafter." 

From  her  Diary. — "  Returned  from  Cambridge.  The  Lord 
carried  me  out,  and  brought  be  home  in  safety.  I  have  had 
many  things  to  exercise  my  mind,  and  some  very  important 
ones  to  decide  upon.  May  God  add  His  blessing,  and  merci- 
fully forgive  my  manifold  infirmities  and  shortcomings.  I 
have  to  praise  His  holy  name  for  a  comfortable  assurance  of 
my  adoption  in  His  family.  I  can  come  to  Him  as  my  Fa- 
ther, and  find  it  good  to  draw  near  to  Him  at  all  times.  His 
loving-kindness  He  does  not  take  from  me,  nor  suffer  His 
faithfulness  to  fail.     Blessed  be  God  for  His  goodness  to  dear 

G !     From  a  letter  received  from  him,  it  appears  Christ 

has  mercifully  at  last  shone  in  upon  his  soul.  I  rejoice  over 
him,  and  pray  he  may  be  kept  still  going  forward,  until  he  ob- 
tains a  clearer  view  of  the  loveliness  of  his  dear  Redeemer." 

"April  17th. — I  have  just  returned  from  Islington  church, 
where  I  heard  Mr.  Melville.  I  wished  much  to  hear  him 
preach  on  the  second  advent  of  Christ,  but  was  disappointed, 
as  he  did  not  touch  upon  the  subject ;  but  he  was  very  great  and 
powerful.  The  text  was,  /  am  the  Lord.  I  change  not ;  there- 
fore ye  sons  ofJacoh  are  not  consumed.  He  was  very  excellent 
upon  the  immutability  of  God.  I  never  heard  a  more  power- 
ful preacher,  and  one  so  completely  full  on  every  point  be 


LETTER    TO    HER    SOX,    REV.    I.    D.    W.  131 

touched.  I  thought,  however,  there  was  not  enough  of  Christ; 
but  he  was  more  on  the  attributes  of  God,  particularly  on  His 
unchangeable  nature,  and  the  impossibility  of  being  otherwise 
than  what  he  had  declared  Himself  to  be — an  unchanging 
God." 


TO    HER    SON,    REV.    I.    D.  W- 


"  June  15th. —  .     .  Tiie  Lord  has  wonderfully  upheld  me 

in 's  illness,  and  under  great  fatigue  and  anxiety.     As  thy 

day  Z5,  so  shall  thy  strength  be,  is  a  promise  fulfilled  afresh,  as  it 
has  been  a  thousand  times   over   in   my  experience.     I   have 

been  thinking  of entering  upon  his  new  sphere  of  labour, 

and  it  recalled  to  my  recollection,  as  illustrating  the  uncer- 
tainty of  life's  brightest  prospects,  the  Lord's  mysterious  deal- 
ings with  two  ministers,  with  whose  cases  I  became  acquainted 
in  New  York.  The  one  was  that  of  the  Rev.  George  Duffie, 
minister  of  St.  Thomas's  Episcopal  church;  and  the  other, 
that  of  the  Rev.  M.  Bruen,  minister  of  the  Bleeker-street 
Presbyterian  church.  Their  attached  congregations  erected 
for  them  new  and  beautiful  sanctuaries,  with  handsome  dwell- 
ings adjacent.  Their  prospects  for  the  future  were  bright  and 
promising,  but  soon  after  these  edifices  were  completed,  and 
they  had  taken  possession  of  them,  both,  after  a  few  days'  ill- 
ness, were  brought  to  the  grave.  The  circumstances  made  a 
deep  impression  on  my  mind  at  the  time,  and  which  I  have 

not  yet  lost.     I  have  written  to to  remind  him  of  this, 

and  to  implore  him  to  turn  in  upon  his  own  heart,  and  see  how 
matters  stand  between  his  soul  and  God.  It  is  an  easy  thing 
to  preach  to  others,  and  to  do  many  things :  but  it  is  quite 
another  matter  to  appear  naked  before  a  holy  God,  and  to 
render  an  account  of  every  idle  word.  True,  His  children  are 
already  justified,  and  stand  complete  in  Christ ;  but  even  here 
we  may  be  taken  by  surprise,  and  what  is  yet  more  awful, 
may  make  a  fatal  mistake.  Therefore  it  is  that  the  Lord 
warns  us  to  watch  for  His  coming.  Oh,  that  we  may  go  to 
Jesus  for  a  fresh  anointing  of  His  Spirit !  The  Lord  has,  I 
hear,  suddenly  removed  one  that  was  committed  to  your 
charge.  Did  you  ever  examine  her  as  to  the  state  of  her 
soul  ?  Did  you  personally  warn  her  of  her  woful  condition  as 
a  sinner  ?  It  is  easy  for  you  to  warn  sinners  from  the  pulpit ; 
but  to  go  to  them,  examine  their  hope,  and  to  deal  faithfully, 
honestly,  yet  affectionately  with  them  as  in  the  sight  of  God, 


132  MEMOIR   OF    xMRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

is  the  solemn  duty  of  every  one  who  stands  up  professedly  in 
the  name  of  Christ.  Whatever  God  has  given  you  to  do,  do 
it  faithfully  as  in  His  sight,  whose  eye  is  watching  all  you  do 
and  all  you  do  not.  Oh,  that  you  might  feel  the  infinite  value 
of  one  lost  soul,  and  the  responsibility  that  rests  upon  you  as 
a  professing  minister  of  Christ !  You  may  reply,  that  people 
will  resist  this  personal  examination.  They  may  say  so  at 
first,  and  yet  they  may  have  to  thank  you  for  it  to  all  eternity. 
It  is  not  talking  about  religion,  or  assenting  to  all  you  say,  that 
accomplishes  the  great  object ;  it  is  a  close  personal  investiga- 
tion of  the  real  condition  of  their  never-dying  soul.  It  is  not 
their  constant  attendance  at  church,  and  taking  the  sacrament, 
and  saying  prayers,  that  will  save  them ;  you  have  been 
taught  difierently  from  this,  and  therefore  more  will  be  required 
at  your  hands." 

"  I  was  glad  to  hear  from  you,  and  trust  you  are  in  your 
new  habitation  by  this  time.  Be  thankful  for  it,  and  look  fully 
to  the  Lord,  and  He  will  supply  all  your  need^  according  to  His 
riches  in  glory  hy  Jesus  Christ.  Only  think  of  such  an  encour- 
aging promise  made  to  us !  Why  need  we  want  any  good, 
when  the  Lord  has  said.  No  good  thing  loill  He  loithhold  from 
them  that  lualk  uprightly  ?  And  again,  /,  the  Lord,  search  the 
heart,  to  give  to  every  man  according  as  his  ivork  shall  he.  Thus 
the  Lord  deals  with  us  according  to  the  working  of  the  heart. 
How  jealous,  then,  ought  we  to  be  over  our  hearts ;  and  when 
we  find  a  traitor  there,  how  earnest  should  we  be  to  bring  him 
directly  to  the  Saviour,  that  He  might  enable  us  to  place  our 
foot  upon  its  neck,  while  He  himself  subdues  the  evil  that  He 
hates.  How  many,  alas  !  there  are,  who  deem  a  life  of  exter- 
nal decency  and  order  alone  sufficient ;  who  think,  if  they  scru- 
pulously attend  religious  duties,  visit  the  poor,  &c.,  God  is 
well  pleased,  and  all  is  well.  But  God  has  to  do  with  the 
heart,  and  all  these  external  things  might  be  done,  and  yet 
everything  be  wrong  there.  He  looks  at  the  spring  of  all  we 
do,  not  at  the  action  only,  but  at  the  motive  from  whence  it 
springs.  The  apostle  speaks  of  the  constraining  love  of  Christ. 
Love  to  God,  and  love  to  His  people  because  they  are  Plis, 
should  be  the  ruling  principle  urging  on  to  every  good  word 
and  work.  The  Lord  is  blessing 's  ministry.  Leaming- 
ton is  highly  blest  with  the  Gospel.     Mr.  Craig  is  faithful  to 

sinners,   and  so  is  dear  Dr.  Marsh.     Lord has  got  the 

honour  he  sought,  but  oh,  what  a  bubble !     Oh,  that  we  might 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,    REV.    I.    D.    W.  133 

always  endeavour  in  all  things,  in  thought,  word,  and  deed,  to 
please  God ;  setting  aside  everything  which  is  not  connected 
with  His  glory,  and  contemplate  all  things  and  all  events  more 
in  the  light  of  eternity  !  My  dear  children,  I  see  myself  more 
and  more,  every  hour,  a  poor  sinner,  unworthy  of  the  least 
crumb  that  falleth  from  the  Master's  table.  But  I  see,  at  the 
same  time,  Jesus  a  great  Saviour,  divinely  able,  and  most  lov- 
ingly willing,  to  save  the  chief  of  sinners,  even  me  ;  and  no 
one  can  tell  how  this  thought  fills  my  heart  with  contrition, 
and  my  eyes  with  tears.  I  have  never  wept  so  much  for  sin 
as  I  have  done  lately.  Often  have  I  put  up  the  prayer,  Search 
me,  0  God.  The  Lord  has  heard  and  answered  it ;  and  oh,  if 
it  had  not  been  that  the  fountain  was  still  open,  I  should  have 
sunk  into  unutterable  despair.  He  has  ploughed  up  the  fallow 
ground  afresh  of  my  poor  heart,  and  the  view  presented  has 
prostrated  me  in  the  dust ;  and  if  ever  I  felt  what  a  broken 
heart  and  contrite  spirit  was,  I  have  of  late.  Oh,  the  evil 
that  is  there  covered  over  by  the  rank  weeds  of  self-love,  self- 
complacency,  or  self  in  some  hideous  form  or  other,  that  it  is  not 
discernible  until  the  Holy  Spirit  makes  it  known.  And  yet 
how  little  do  we  know  of  it  even  by  this  divine  teaching ! 
But  if  God  is  pleased  to  show  us  enough  to  make  us  cling 
closer  to  the  cross,  to  make  Jesus  more  precious,  sin  more  hate- 
ful, and  our  prayers  more  of  a  wrestling  character  for  the 
special,  sanctifying,  life-giving  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  shall 
we  not  have  cause  to  praise  and  bless  His  holy  name  for  ever 
and  ever  ?  But  while  I  have  thus  been  led  of  late  to  mourn 
so  much  for  sin,  I  have  never  felt  pardon  so  abundantly  mani- 
fested. God  be  praised  for  a  free-grace  gospel!  Oh,  keep 
close  to  the  cross  !  Look  well  to  your  own  vineyard,  and 
then  will  you  be  able  to  take  care  of  the  vineyards  of  others. 
Know  nothing  among  men  save  Christ  Jesus  crucified.  Take 
Him  for  an  example  in  all  things  ;  aim  to  have  a  single  eye  to 
His  glory ;  and  that  God  may  bless  you  and  give  you  abund- 
ance of  grace  here,  and  a  plenitude  of  glory  hereafter,  are  the 
prayers  of  yours,  &c." 

It  was  in  1833  that  Mrs.  Winslow  paid  a  final  visit  to  the 
United  States.  It  was  at  a  somewhat  advanced  period  of  life 
tliat  she  took  this  step  ;  but  she  was  constrained  to  do  so  with 
the  view  of  meeting,  for  the  last  time  on  earth,  her  aged 
parent,  and  her  children  who  were  residing  there.  Accom- 
panied by  her  daughter  slie  again  embarked  upon  the  ocean. 


134  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

Her  outward  passage  was  attended  with  much  personal  suf- 
fering and  relative  anxiety.  But  God  sustained  and  bore  her 
through  it  all,  and  granted  her  a  happy  re-union  with  those 
she  lov^ed.  After  twelve  months  of  sacred  enjoyment,  she 
parted  from  them,  to  meet  no  more  until  they  assembled  again 
"  without  fault  before  the  throne  of  God  and  the  Lamb."  The 
following  interesting  letter  to  her  pastor,  Rev.  J.  H.  Evans, 
and  extracts  from  her  private  journal,  touchingly  describe  her 
exercises  during  this  visit ;  while  they  present  her  as  still 
maintaining  the  same  elevated  tone  of  spirituality,  child-like 
trust  in  God,  and  singleness  of  heart  in  His  service,  which 
characterized  her  in  all  places  and  under  ail  circumstances : — 

"  Beloved  Brother, —  New  York,  June  22d,  1833. 

"  How  I  have  wished  to  write  to  you  since  my  arrival, 
but  hitherto  I  have  not  been  permitted.  The  Lord  has  carried 
me  through  many  trials  and  sorrows  since  I  saw  you,  and  He 
has  also  given  me  to  see  much  of  His  goodness,  faithfulness, 
and  unchano:inor  love,  towards  the  unworthiest  of  all  His  saints 
— the  weakest  of  the  w^eak  and  the  vilest  of  the  vile  ;  but  so  it 
is,  and  on  such  he  loves  to  bestow  His  choicest  mercies.  For 
ever  blessed  be  His  name,  my  soul  can  adore  Him  ;  and  it  is 
my  heart's  desire  to  trust  him  to  the  end.  I  left  England  with 
a  heavy  heart.  The  parting  w^th  my  dear  children  on  the 
deck  of  the  vessel,  on  a  wet,  dark,  and  dreary  night,  was  dis- 
mal. When  they  left  me,  I  retired  to  my  cabin,  to  commit 
them  and  myself  to  God.  [Here  follow  details  of  the  severe 
illness  of  her  daughter  and  herself]  But  God  was  with  me  ; 
and,  as  soon  as  I  was  recovered,  I  lifted  up  my  heart  to  Him 
who  alone  could  help  me  in  this  my  great  time  of  need.  I  felt 
persuaded  my  dear  child  might  in  a  moment  be  in  eternity. 
Oh,  it  was  a  trying  season.  I  clung  to  Christ — pleaded  the 
promise  that  He  once  had  made  over  to  me,  that  He  would  be 
a  Father  to  my  fatherless  children,  and  implored  Him,  in  the 
dear  name  of  Jesus,  to  spare  her  until  she  knew  him  as  her 
reconciled  Father  in  Christ  Jesus.  It  was  a  trial  of  faith — 
naked  faith,  resting  entirely  on  the  faithfulness  of  God.  The 
Lord  lieard  my  petition ;  and,  although  she  continued  more  or 
less  ill,  she  gradually  recovered.  The  weather  was  stormy 
and  most  unpleasant  during  the  greater  part  of  the  passage — 
but  He  brought  us  through  all;  and  on  the  7th  of  May  I  had 
the  comfort,  nay  the  joy,  of  seeing  my  three  sons  shedding 


FINAL  VISIT   TO    AMERICA.  135 

many  tears  of  gratitude  over  me,  on  that  very  spot  upon  the 
deck  where  my  heart  had  been  agonized  with  sorrow,  and 

from  whence  I  had  sent  up  so  many  fervent  petitions.     E 

was  aUve  and  better ;  R ,  H ,  and  0 were  clus- 
tering around  me,  in  joyful  gratitude  to  God  for  bringing  me 
once  more  to  them.  I  felt  happy;  but  oh,  my  dear  brother, 
none  but  God  himself  could  bear  wnth  such  as  we  are.  Did 
my  thank-offerings  go  up  with  as  much  fervour  as  my  earnest 
wrestlings  for  help  ?  Ah  me  !  This  has  been  my  grief,  and 
has  often  laid  me  low  before  God.  I  abhor  myself  in  dust  and 
ashes  on  this  very  account.  It  is  my  greatest  comfort  that 
Jesus  lives,  and  is  at  the  right  hand  of  God,  and  His  precious 
blood  cleanseth  from  all  sin." 

"  Last  evening  dear  0 was  ordained.     It  was  a  most 

interesting  service.  You  may  suppose  what  I  felt  when  I 
saw  my  son  kneeling,  while  the  hands  of  the  Presbytery  were 
laid  upon  his  head,  and  prayer  was  offered  that  God  would  fit 
him  for  tlie  great  work  to  which  he  was  solemnly  being  set 
apart.  TVhen  I  saw  the  hands  of  the  ministers  resting  upon 
him,  my  prayer  was,  '  Now,  Lord,  lay  Thy  hand.  Thy  blessed 
hand  upon  him,  and  fill  him  with  the  Holy  Ghost,  that  he  may 
do  Thy  work  from  the  heart,  and  be  kept  humbly  sitting  at 
Thy  feet.'  My  paper  is  drawing  to  a  close,  and  I  have  not 
said  half  that  is  in  my  heart.  We  both  said,  that  evening, 
*  Oh,  that  dear  Mr.  Evans  had  been  in  that  pulpit !  We  love 
you ;  and  never  can  be  sufficiently  thankful  to  God  for  the  rich 
blessing  He  has  made  your  ministry  to  us  both.  Pray  for  us. 
I  do  value  your  prayers ;  for  often  have  they  led  me  nearer  to 
Christ.     Dear  friend,  farewell." 

From  her  diary  at  sea. — "  May  1st,  1833. — Left  England  on 
the  1st  of  April,  from  Portsmouth.  We  are  now  nearly  four 
hundred  miles  from  New  York,  with  a  light  wind.  Our  pas- 
sage thus  far  has  been  most  unpleasant.     The  first  ten  days 

E was  so  ill  I  thought  she  would  have  died.     I  cried  to 

the  Lord  and  He  heard  me,  and  has  been  better  to  me  than 
my  fears  on  her  account.  We  have  had  unpleasant  passen- 
gers, which  has  added  much  to  the  discomforts  of  a  sea- voyage. 
My  health  has  greatly  suffered,  from  fatigue  of  mind  and  body. 
Oh,  that  the  Lord  may  be  gracious  to  me,  and  overrule  all  for 
our  good  and  His  own  glory!  He  has  been  my  Helper  hither- 
to, and  will  he  not  be  my  Helper  still  ?  In  Him  is  all  my 
trust.     The  weather  is  now  fine,  and  all  on  deck  are  enjoying 


136  MEMOIR   OP   MRS.   MARY    WINSLOW. 

it.  May  the  Lord,  who  has  preserved  us  through  so  many 
storms  and  dangers,  carry  us  in  safety,  and  give  me  to  see  my 
children's  face  with  joy,  and  not  with  grief,  and  lay  His  cause 
upon  all  our  hearts ;  so  that  we  may,  as  with  one  heart,  enter 
upon  the  work  with  a  single  eye  to  His  glory,  and  find  it  our 
sweetest  meat  and  drink  to  do  His  will." 

"  Neiv  York^  8th. — The  Lord  has  again  brought  me  to  this  dis- 
tant land,  after  passing  through  much  sickness  and  anxiety  on 
the  passage,  and  caused  me  to  see  the  faces  of  my  three  children 

with  joy ;  and  has,  within  a  few  days,  brought  dear  G 

from  Bermuda  to  join  our  family  circle.  For  ever  blessed  be 
his  dear  name,  for  so  many  instances  of  His  wondrous  love  to 
unworthy  me." 

"  19th. — I  have  had  the  comfort  of  seeing  my  three  children 
engaged  in  the  service  of  Christ,  on  that  very  spot  where, 
seven  years  ago,  He  translated  them  out  of  Satan's  kingdom 
into  the  kingdom  of  His  dear  Son.  Precious  Jesus  !  fit  them 
all  for  great  usefulness,  and  cherish  this  infant  church  in  Thy 
tender  bosom.  Carry  the  pastor  and  the  fiock  near  Thy  com- 
passionate heart,  and  greatly  bless  with  the  gifts  and  graces  of 
Thy  Holy  Spirit.  My  dear  mother,  too,  in  her  84th  year,  has 
arrived,  accompanied  by  B from  Cincinnati.  She  is  con- 
fined to  her  room  from  lameness.  Her  memory  fails  her  much; 
but,  although  the  earthly  tabernacle  seems  by  little  and  little 
to  be  dissolving,  she  still  retains  the  same  kind  and  tender  feel- 
ing towards  all  around  her.  Her  faith  seems  firm  in  Christ ; 
and  when  she  can  fix  her  mind,  she  appears  to  rejoice  in  the 
hope  set  before  her  in  the  gospel.  May  her  last  days  be  her 
happiest  and  brightest !" 

"  Have  had  of  late  increasing  reason  to  know  that  God's  ear 
is  ever  open  to  the  cry  of  His  children,  and  that  He  will  send 
down  answers  of  peace.  I  was  ill, — my  pain  very  great  for 
some  hours, — nothing  appeared  to  give  me  relief.  At  last  I 
fled  to  my  stronghold :  I  cried  unto  the  Lord,  and  He  heard 
me.  The  pain  abated,  and  in  about  fifteen  minutes  I  fell 
asleep,  and  awoke  in  the  morning,  feeling  only  weak,  and 
gradually  recovered.  Oh,  that  I  did  but  always  at  once  look 
up  to  Christ !  But  what  a  lamentable  proneness  to  go  every- 
where else  before  we  flee  into  the  name  of  the  Lord,  which  is 
a  strong  tower  to  the  righteous.  Have  been  helped  to  rejoice 
in  His  goodness  of  late,  and  feel  my  confidence  increase  while 
at  a  throne  of  grace.     It  seems,  while  there,  as  if  I  could  not 


DIARY.  137 

doubt.  I  can  realize  the  mighty  blessings  of  the  everlasting 
gospel  as  mine,  and  my  mind  sweetly  rests  on  the  Divine 
faithfulness.  I  seldom  rise  from  my  knees  without  weeping ; 
my  whole  heart  melted  with  contrition  in  view  of  the  wonder- 
ful love  of  God  to  one  so  poor  and  vile  as  I.  Oh,  how  near 
does  He  sometimes  draw  me  to  Himself!  And  when  I  look 
around,  and  see  so  many  mercies,  so  many  blessings,  such  ten- 
der care  in  providing  for  all  my  wants,  no  good  things  with- 
held,— although  my  base  heart  has  distrusted  Him  in  the  very 
midst  of  countless  proofs  of  His  love, — I  abhor  myself  in  dust 
and  in  ashes.  God  has  forgiven,  and  does  forgive  me,  but  I 
cannot  forgive  myself." 

"25th. — How  is  it  w^ith  thee,  0  my  soul?  Hovv^  is  it  be- 
tween thee  and  God  ?  This  is  a  question  I  often  need  put  to 
myself  as  I  journey  onward.  I  require  to  pause  and  think 
what  I  am,  and  what  I  am  doing,  and  whether  I  really  am 
going  forward  or  not.  I  have  been  thinking  with  what  a  de- 
lusion Satan  continually  aims  to  blind  the  minds  of  men  as  to 
the  brevity  and  uncertainty  of  human  life.  How  often  does 
he  prevail,  even  w^ith  the  real  Christian !  On  looking  back 
upon  the  past  sixty  years  of  my  life,  and  forward  to  the  little 
point  that  remains,  what  a  dream !  How  like  a  vision  does  it 
appear !  Oh,  how  little  of  it,  if  any  at  all,  has  been  spent  to 
the  real  glory  of  Him  who  gave  it.  I  cannot  trace  a  single 
thing  I  ever  did  in  my  whole  life,  that  affords  me  any  real 
pleasure  to  look  back  upon.  Oh,  if  I  had  nothing  more  to 
comfort  me,  I  should  be  a  wretched  creature  indeed !  And 
now  I  know  and  feel  at  times  what  a  behever  in  Christ  should 
be  who  is  a  candidate  for  a  crown  of  glory,  and  a  disciple  of 
Him  who  was  not  of  this  Avorld ;  but  how  far  short  do  I 
come !  Sometimes,  when  at  a  throne  of  grace,  I  can  see  and 
feel  forcibly  the  littleness  of  everything  around  me  ;  and  when 
I  have  a  glimpse  of  God  as  He  is  in  Himself,  as  well  as  what 
He  is  to  my  soul,  I  sink  in  all  my  nothingness,  melted  into 
love  at  His  feet.  What  should  I  do  but  for  Jesus  ?  Precious 
Jesus !  I  do  love  Thee.  Thou  art  the  chief  among  ten  thou- 
sand. I  am  wearied  with  the  creature,  for  disappointment  is 
■written  upon  the  dearest  object  here  below.  But  in  Thee 
there  is  no  disappointment,  thou  blessed,  dearest  one.  Oh, 
that  I  could  love  Thee  as  I  wish  to  do,  and  serve  Thee  with 
all  the  powers  of  my  mind  and  body !  Let  not  my  heart 
wander  from  Thee :  keep  me  under  the  shadow  of  Thy  wing 
till  the  storm  of  life  be  past." 


138  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

"Oct.  15th,  1833. — New  York. — My  dear  mother  sailed 
on  this  day  for  Bermuda.  I  felt  I  never  loved  her  so  well 
before  as  1  have  since  she  left  us.  When  I  fancy  her,  aged, 
feeble,  and,  perhaps,  ill,  on  a  tempestuous  ocean,  and  exposed 
to  all  the  discomforts  of  a  voyage,  I  can  but  weep  and  pray. 
Pray  for  her  I  do,  and  that  is  my  only  comfort.  I  believe  the 
Lord  loves  her  better  than  I  do,  and  to  His  care  I  constantly 
commit  her.  She  was  determined  to  go,  as  she  said,  to  lay 
her  bones  in  her  own  native  place.  I  urged  her  to  remain 
with  me,  but  it  was  her  wish  and  decided  determination ;  and 
if  the  Lord  takes  her  in  safety,  she  will  escape  the  cold  win- 
ter here,  and  may  live  a  few  years  longer  for  it.  May  God 
in  His  mercy  carry  her  in  safety  !" 

It  was  again  her  privilege  during  this  brief  and  final  visit  to 
the  United  States  to  participate  in  one  of  those  showers  of 
spiritual  blessing  to  which  reference  is  made  in  the  earlier  part 
of  this  volume.  The  following  letter,  addressed  to  her  pastor, 
will  convey  some  idea  of  the  themes  and  the  style  of  the  pul- 
pit addresses  which  generally  prevail  on  these  interesting  oc- 
casions, and  the  mode  of  meeting  the  numerous  cases  of  awak- 
ening which  occur  : — 

"Beloved  Bro.  in  the  Lord, —  N.  Y.,  Jan.  24tb,  1833. 

"  The  Lord  seems  to  have  awakened  his  servants 
here  to  a  sense  of  their  duty,  and  the  vast  responsibility  at- 
tached to  them  as  His  ministers.  '  Protracted  meetings  '  are 
now  held  in  almost  all  the  churches,  and  some  of  them  are  of 
a  most  interesting  character.  I  have  been  for  some  days  at- 
tending one  ;  it  is  in  a  Presbyterian  church,  and  the  ministers 
who  conduct  it  seem  men  of  God,  and  preach  as  with  the 
great  white  throne  full  in  view.  The  grand  aim  in  their  preach- 
ing and  addresses  is,  to  rouse  the  sinner — to  follow  him  in  all 
his  refuges  of  lies — to  knock  from  beneath  him  every  false 
prop,  and  to  show  him  that  if  he  perislies,  the  fault  is  not 
God's,  but  his  own.  Next  to  this,  their  endeavour  is  to  awaken 
the  church  itself  to  activity  and  earnestness  in  the  cause  of 
God.  The  whole  day,  from  six  o'clock  in  the  morning  until 
half-past  nine  o'clock  in  the  evening,  with  intervals,  is  devoted 
to  prayer  and  preaching.  After  the  sermon,  all  who  feel 
themselves  lost  and  undone  sinners  are  invited  to  come  for- 
ward and  occupy  pews  in  front  of  the  pulpit.  The  praying 
part  of  the  assembly  then  cluster  round  them,  and  petitions 


REVIVAL    IX    NEW    YORK.  139 

are  offered  on  their  behalf.  This  would  be  a  new  and  strange 
thing  in  England,  but  God  sees  fit  to  own  this  to  the  salvation 
of  many  souls.  Last  evening  I  felt  it  peculiarly  solemn.  I 
felt  God  was  there.  Seventeen  individuals  advanced,  many 
young,  some  elderly  men,  deeply  concerned.  Oh,  how  my 
heart  was  drawn  out  towards  God  on  their  behalf !  There  was 
no  excitement — no  noise  or  enthusiasm.  The  feeling  was 
deep,  silent,  solemn  as  eternity.  All  knelt  and  followed  in 
prayer,  which  consisted  of  eight  or  nine  short,  earnest,  wresthng 
petitions  to  God  for  their  salvation.  The  church  was  earnestly 
exhorted  to  lay  aside  their  earthly  concerns  for  a  season,  and 
give  themselves  wholly  up  to  the  Lord  and  to  His  work. 
While  some  are  engaged  in  the  prayer-meetings,  others 
go  out  in  the  lanes  and  alleys  to  persuade  men  and  women 
to  come  and  hear  the  sound  of  the  gospel.  The  minister 
visits,  and  receives  visits  at  home  after  the  meetings  for 
prayer.     I  feel  my  heart  a  little  revived  already,  and  bless 

God  for  it I  should  remark,  that  while  the  church  is 

stirred  up  to  plead  earnestly  for  sinners,  the  Lord  the  Spirit 
causes  them  to  feel  their  own  lack,  and  brings  them  to  God  in 
humble  confession  of  their  coldness  and  unbelief.  Unbelief, 
unbelief,  oh,  this  is  our  great  crime  before  God !  We  will  not 
take  Him  at  His  word,  fully  believing  all  that  He  has  prom, 
ised.  Did  w^e  really  believe  that  sinners  will  be  cast  into  hell, 
should  we  not  be  more  earnest  both  with  them  and  with  God, 
although  we  do  know  that  salvation  is  of  God,  and  that  He 
alone  can  save  a  sinner  ?  Oh  yes,  we  should.  But  our  faith 
is  so  small,  and  what  we  have  we  do  not  exercise  sufficiently 
to  obtain  more.  Is  it  not  often  but  a  mere  form  of  words, 
when  we  pray.  Lord.,  increase  our  faith?  It  is  a  cold,  formal 
duty,  and  we  go  away,  and  think  no  more  of  it,  and  so  God 
does  n3t  grant  the  boon  we  so  little  value.  I^Iay  the  Lord 
renew  His  precious  work  in  our  souls !  If  the  religion  of 
Christ  is  not  the  business  of  our  whole  life,  it  is  nothing,  and 
we  are  nothing,  and  shall  be  found  as  nothing,  or  worse  than 
nothing,  w^hen  He  comes  to  judge  the  world." 

"  25th. — The  Lord  is  doing  a  great  work  here,  my   dear 
brother,  and  my  soul  rejoices  in  God   and  in  the  prospects  of 

His  church Whole   families  have,  in    the    last 

two  weeks,  been  translated  out  of  the  kingdom  of  Satan 
into  the  kingdom  of  God's  dear  Son.  The  addresses  yester- 
day were  chiefly  to  urge  Christians  to  increased  activity  and 


140  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

earnestness  in  prayer,  showing  their  great  responsibiUty,  espe- 
cially at  such  a  season.  It  was  solemn,  heart-searching  truth. 
Oh,  if  we  did  but  fully  believe  that  God  will  condemn  the 
impenitent  sinner  to  eternal  perdition,  w^e  should  act  very  dif- 
ferently. But  we  do  not  believe  it,  although  Jehovah  is  as 
much  bound  to  fulfil  that  promise  as  any  other.  How  He 
bears  with  His  redeemed  ones !  Why  are  not  our  children 
converted  ?  Because,  humanly  speaking,  we  care  so  little 
about  it.  We  pray  for  them,  it  is  true ;  but  it  is  with  forma- 
lity and  coldness ;  and  so  we  wrap  it  up,  whilt;  they  are 
rapidly  travelling  to  the  regions  of  eternal  woe.  Last  eve- 
ning, the  '  anxious  seats'  were  filled  with  those  who  earnestly 
desired  the  prayers  of  God's  people.  Many  have  been  recon- 
ciled to  God  through  the  peace-speaking  blood  of  Christ,  and 
many  more  are  inquiring  what  they  shall  do  to  be  saved.  I 
am  glad  to  be  where  Jesus  is  passing  by.  I  just  get  a  glimpse 
of  His  face  now  and  then,  and  can  plead  with  Him  as  a  man 
pleadeth  with  his  friend.  Help  me  to  praise  Him.  When  I 
cannot  find  words,  I  sit  and  weep  before  Him.  His  name  is 
Love.  That  my  soul  knoweth  right  well.  Oh,  that  all  our 
children  might  rise  up  and  call  Him  blessed  !  A  young  lady 
in  the  bloom  of  youth  and  beauty,  living  in  all  the  gaiety  of 
the  world,  was  brought  under  the  appalling  conviction  of  her 
awful  state  before  a  holy  God.  The  world  she  so  much  loved 
was  at  once  dressed  in  sable  to  her  view.  She  was  miserable, 
and  everything  else  looked  so.  For  nights  she  knew  not 
scarcely  what  it  was  to  sleep.  Some  time  after  this  she 
thought  she  had  obtained  a  hope  in  Christ,  but  it  was  soon 
gone,  and  she  was  left  in  darkness.  But  in  a  few  days,  while 
she  was  in  prayer,  and  while  prayer  was  being  made  for  her 
by  the  church,  the  Lord  revealed  Himself  to  her  soul,  and 
filled  it  wnth  unspeakable  joy.  Her  eyes  were  now  opened, 
and  everything  appeared  changed.  She  w^as  happy  in  the 
Lord,  and  her  countenance  was  radiant.  When  her  minister 
entered  the  parlour,  and  extended  his  hand,  he  said,  '  I  need 
not  ask  how  it  is  with  you ;  I  see  you  have  been  with  Jesus.' 
I  must  add  that  this  young  convert,  in  all  the  fervour  of  her 
first  love,  went  from  house  to  house,  amongst  her  kinsfolk  and 
friends,  imploring  them  to  come  and  hear  the  gospel." 

"29th, — Never  did  I  feel  my  mind  more  solemn,  and  my 
heart  more  drawn  out  for  the  salvation  of  sinners,  than  at  the 
present  time.     As  I  sat  last  evening  in  the  sanctuary,  and  saw 


REVIVAL   IN    NEW   YORK.  141 

twenty  or  thirty,  old  and  young,  go  forward  for  the  prayers 
of  God's  people,  thus  acknowledging  that  they  felt  their  need 
of  Christ,  I  raised  my  heart  to  my  Father,  and  prayed  Him, 
for  Jesus'  sake,  to  have  mercy  upon  them.  Dear  brother,  the 
Lord  is  with  us,  doing  a  mighty  work.  The  Baptists  are 
much  engaged.  A  cloud  of  mercy  is  hovering  over  this  city, 
and  the  prayers  of  God's  people  will  pierce  it,  and  bring  down 
showers  of  blessing.  My  children  are  earnestly  engaged  in 
bringing  sinners  where  the  Holy  Ghost  is  displaying  His 
miglity  power.  They  visit  from  house  to  house,  dealing  faith- 
fully with  all  they  meet  who  know  not  God.  My  own  soul 
is  greatly  refreshed  and  drawn  near  to  the  Lord.  For  ever 
blessed  be  His  name  for  this  renewed  token  of  His  kind  re- 
membrance to  one  so  unworthy  of  the  least  of  His  mercies." 

"  30  th. — There  is  not  a  country  in  the  world  where  religion 
and  religious  intelligence  are  so  constantly  and  prominently 
brought  before  the  attention  as  in  this.  In  fact,  it  is,  at  least 
at  the  present  time,  one  continued,  interesting  topic  of  conver- 
sation. Every  one  is  talking  about  it  and  engaged  in  it  some 
way  or  other.  This  is  a  dehghtful  state  of  things.  Our  own 
prayer  meetings  are  taking  a  deeper  tone,  and  the  members  of 
the  church  are  engaged  each  in  visiting  from  house  to  house, 
endeavoring  to  induce  some  poor  sinner  to  come  and  hear  the 
gospel.  This  evening  is  to  be  spent  chiefly  in  prayer  and  ex- 
hortation. The  Lord  is  indeed  doing  a  great  work,  and  all 
seem  alive  to  its  importance,  except  a  few  who  are  endeavour- 
ing to  justify  their  coldness  and  supineness  under  the  plea  of 
God's  sovereignty,  and  so  sit  still  while  others  are  reaping  this 
rich  harvest  of  souls  to  the  glory  of  God.  I  think  I  never 
heard  before  such  fervent  appeals  to  the  consciences  of  men,  so 
completely  divesting  them  of  all  their  refuges  of  lies,  as  I  have 
this  last  week.  How  I  do  love  old-fashioned  conversions, 
where  sinners  are  brought  to  feel  they  are  sinners,  crying  out 
under  the  conviction  '  What  must  I  do  to  be  saved?'  and  are 
then  led  by  the  self-same  Spirit  to  look  to  Jesus,  and  are  at 
once  enabled  to  believe  and  rejoice.  I  cannot  understand  this 
long  process  of  months  and  years  seeking,  and  seeking,  and 
never  finding,  until,  perhaps,  at  a  dying  hour.  God  is  the 
same  now  that  he  was  in  the  New  Testament  times — Christ  is 
the  same — the  Spirit  is  the  same — and  the  sinner  is  the  same. 
"Well,  then,  there  must  be  a  woful  lack  of  the  Spirit's  holy  in- 
fluence, owing  to  our  unbelief.    I  will  continue  to  give  you,  as 


142  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

the  Lord  will  help  me,  an  account  of  His  most  gracious  deal- 
ings with  His  churches  on  this  side  of  the  water.  Oh,  that  the 
Lord  might  visit  you  in  your  part  of  the  vineyard,  and  so  re- 
vive His  work  that  sinners  may  be  converted,  and  the  saints 
sealed  and  set  apart  under  the  fresh  anointings  of  the  Holy 
Ghost.  I  love  poor  perishing  sinners  more  than  I  can  express. 
I  have  been  very  narrow-hearted  and  selfish,  and  I  hate  and 
abhor  myself  because  of  it.  I  have  been  looking  for  salvation 
too  exclusively  for  my  own  family,  and  the  little  circle  about 
me,  and  have  wanted  more  of  that  expansive  love  that  brought 
Christ  from  heaven  to  save  sinners.  Dear  brother,  endeavour 
to  show  them  their  awful  condition ;  scatter  their  vain  excuses, 
and  tell  them  they  must  repent  and  believe  the  gospel,  or  they 
are  lost  for  ever.  They  need  not  be  told  that  they  have  no 
power  to  repent  and  beheve.  They  will  soon  find  they  are 
powerless^  and  begin  to  cry  for  mercy  to  Him  who  will  give  re- 
pentance, and  power  to  beheve  too.  Forgive  me  for  saying 
so  much  on  this  subject  to  you,  who  are  so  much  better  quali- 
fied to  judge  than  I ;  but  I  feel  more  than  ever  the  absolute 
necessity  of  awakening  the  sinner  to  see  his  lost  condition  ; 
for  Satan  has  ten  thousand  ways  of  deluding;  and  shall  we 
not,  under  God,  do  all  we  can,  if  by  any  means  we  may  save 
some  by  plucking  them  out  of  the  fire  ?  Salvation  is  of  God, 
but  the  means  are  ours,  and  we  cheerfully  leave  Him  to  give 
the  blessing.     My  love  to  the  church  in  John  Street." 

After  spending  a  year  in  happy  and  useful  intercourse  with 
her  children,  in  reviving  the  cherished  friendships  of  other 
days,  and  in  seeing  her  aged  parent  once  more,  and  for  the 
last  time  in  the  flesh,  she  re- embarked  for  England.  Her 
homeward  voyage  and  arrival  are  thus  noted  in  her  journal : 

"May  24th,  1834. —  On  hoard  the  2yO'Cket  ship  Philadelphia, 
I  am  once  more  upon  the  mighty  ocean,  on  my  return  to  dear 
England,  with  E.  and  J.  R.  under  my  care.  The  weather  is 
delightful,  the  wind  fair,  and  everything  comfortable  as  I  could 
possibly  expect  on  board  ship.  It  was  a  severe  trial,  parting 
with  my  dear  children.  My  mind  was  greatly  exercised,  as 
usual,  to  know  the  path  of  duty.  So  far  the  Lord  has  pros- 
pered our  voyage.  I  do  pray  He  may  be  pleased  to  continue 
His  tender  mercies  towards  us,  and  grant  me  to  see  the  face 
of  my  dear  children,  to  whom  I  am  going,  with  comfort,  and 
preserve  those  I  have  been  obliged  to  leave  behind.  The  Lord 
is  good,  and  my  soul  desires  to  praise  His  holy  name." 


DEATH    OF    HER   MOTHER.  143 

"In  sight  of  the  Lizard  and  of  dear  old  En-rland  once  more, 
after  a  prosperous  voyage  of  eighteen  days  from  New  York. 
The  Lord  has  wonderfully  appeared  for  me,  and  many  have 
been  the  prayers  offered  up  on  my  behalf,  and  which  He  has 
in  condescending  mercy  deigned  to  answer.  A  pleasant  cap- 
tain and  a  fine  ship," 

"  Landed  in  Portsmouth  in  good  health,  and  left  the  next 
day  for  London,  where  I  arrived  at  nine  o'clock  in  the  even- 
ing, and  found  all  well  and  happy  to  see  me  again.  The  Lord 
has  been  merciful  indeed  to  me.  His  name  is  '  Love.'  For  ever 
blessed  be  His  holy  name,  for  all  His  dealings  toAvards  me. 
My  hope  is  in  Him  for  all  things  here  and  hereafter.  God  be 
praised !" 

The  mother  of  Mrs,  Winslow  has  already  been  introduced 
to  the  reader.  The  time  arrived  when  her  long  and  steady 
course  should  be  finished,  and  she  should  enter  into  the  joy  of 
her  Lord.  Full  of  year.^,  rich  in  grace,  and  ripe  for  glory,  this 
venerable  and  beloved  lady  breathed  her  last  in  her  own  native 
isle,  and  was  buried  in  the  sepulchre  of  her  fathers.  In  her 
diary  Mrs.  Winslow  thus  briefly  but  touchingly  records  this 
event : — 

"Heard  of  the  death  of  my  beloved  and  ever-precious 
mother,  the  oldest  and  dearest  friend  I  had  in  this  world  of 
sorrow.  She  has  gone,  I  trust,  to  glory,  and  is  now  rejoicing 
with  Christ  and  the  many  dear  friends  who  have  gone  before 
her.  Who  can  tell  the  glory  that  surrounds  the  saints  on  their 
entrance  into  that  abode  of  bliss?  How  strange  that  we  do 
not  more  long  to  be  there !  Dearest  mamma,  you  are  now 
freed  from  a  body  of  sin  and  death,  and  a  life  of  pain  and  suf- 
fering. I  sorrow,  but  not  as  those  who  have  no  hope.  I  do 
have  a  hope  of  her  that  gladdens  my  heart,  and  I  trust  to  see 
her  again  at  the  right  hand  of  Christ,  and  to  spend  a  happy 
eternity  with  her,  and  go  no  more  out  for  ever.  Oh,  that  I 
may  be  helped  to  keep  my  garments  unspotted  from  the  world, 
and  to  be  ready  when  the  summons  comes." 

On  the  appointment  of  her  son,  the  Rev.  G.  E.  Winslow, 
to  the  vicarage  of  Tugby,  Leicestershire,  she  spent  a  few 
months  there,  from  whence  the  following  extracts  are  dated. 
Possessing,  as  we  have  already  remarked,  an  exquisite  taste 
for  landscape  beauty,  and  charmed  with  the  simplicity  of  rural 
life,  a  picturesque  country  village — its  ivy-mantled  church  and 
pretty  vicarage,  its  rude  hamlets  and  honest  villagers,  its  sim- 


144  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

plicity  and  repose  would  harmonize  with  her  feehn^,  and 
supply  her  with  rich  material  for  reflection  of  an  interesting 
and  varied  character.  And  when  to  her  fondness  for  the 
country  we  add  the  spiritual  eye  with  which  she  would  con- 
template the  works  of  God — seeing,  enjoying,  and  glorifying 
Him  in  all — we  are  prepared  to  find  her  pouring  forth  such 
pious  thoughts  and  poetic  feelings,  and  sketching,  with  her 
holy  and  graphic  pen,  such  interesting  village  scenes  as  are 
contained  in  the  following  extract  from  letters  : — 

TO    HER    SON. 

^^  Tughy  Vicarage^  July^  1837. — How  lovely  is  all  nature. 
As  I  sit  at  my  window  with  the  casement  open,  the  beautiful 
lawn  in  front,  the  fine  tall  trees  surrounding  it,  the  hawthorn 
hedges,  the  green  fields  stretching  beyond,  with  the  bright  sun 
and  refreshing  breeze  imparting  life  and  healthfulness  to  the 
whole,  truly  do  I  feel  that  there  is  nothing  like  the  works  of 
God,  I  have  just  been  walking  round  the  lawn,  inhaling  the 
fragrance  of  the  sweet  roses  which  hang  in  rich  clusters  from 
the  house,  thrusting  their  heads  into  the  parlour  window. 
This  is  a  sweet  place.  But  every  place  where  Jesus  is,  and 
which  He  blesses  with  His  presence,  is  sweet.  He  can  trans- 
form a  dungeon  into  a  palace,  and  His  presence  can  turn  dark- 
ness into  light.     G has  just  gone  to  Norton  to  preach.     I 

have  been  praying  for  him,  that  while  he  is  preaching  to  others 
God  might,  tlirough  the  Eternal  Spirit,  preach  to  him.  And 
I  have  been  praying  for  you  too.  And  oh,  that  God  might 
make  you  a  real  blessing,  anoint  you  afresh  for  jowr  all-impor- 
tant work,  and  keep  you  sitting  low  in  a  low  place  at  the  feet 
of  Jesus.  My  heart  is  often  drawn  out  on  your  behalf,  that 
you  may  be  more  and  more  deeply  taught  of  the  Holy  Ghost, 
may  preach  and  act  only  to  please  God,  losing  sight  of  self 
and  of  everything  but  Christ,  in  a  full  view  of  the  great  white 
throne,  and  under  a  deep  sense  of  the  vast  responsibihty  that 
rests  upon  you  as  a  minister  of  Christ.  I  sometimes  think  I 
should  have  wearied  out  all  the  host  of  heaven  with  my  many 
thousand  prayers  and  petitions  for  you  all,  and  for  myself;  but 
God  is  love,  and  His  love  is  never  wearied  with  hearing." 

"  At  the  entrance  of  the  village  is  the  cottage  of  a  poor  aged 
widow,  who  can  with  difficulty  move  upon  her  crutches  from 
chair  to  chair  ;  but  she  knows  and  loves  the  Lord.  Her  Bibj<^, 
*  Fox's  Book  of  Martyrs,'  a  volume  of  sermons  by  an  old  divin*.-. 


VISIT   TO    TUGBY   VICARAGE.  145 

and  the  '  Pilgrim's  Progress,'  have  been  her  chief  means  of  in- 
struction, and  God  has  blessed  them  to  her  soul.  She  is  greatly 
afflicted  with  bodily  infirmity,  but  patient,  submissive,  and 
thankful.  I  often  leave  the  vicarage,  and  bend  my  steps  to 
this  lonely  pilgrim,  where,  seated  in  an  old  broken  chair  by 
her  little  fire  of  dried  sticks,  we  talk  of  Christ  and  what  he  has 
done  for  us  both,  and  of  our  happy  prospects,  till  my  heart  is 
soothed  and  refreshed,  and  the  dear  redeemed  old  saint  unites 
her  praises  with  mine. 

"  The  church  is  romantically  situated  on  a  rising  ground, 
which  looks  down  on  the  village  below,  and  commands  a  beau- 
tiful prospect  of  the  surrounding  country.  It  is  skirted  with 
large  and  beautiful  trees,  which  overshadow  the  graves  of  the 
many  dead  who  sleep  here  until  the  resurrection  day.  It  is  a 
pleasant  retreat  for  contemplation.  I  often  sit  here,  and  turn 
my  eyes  from  the  dead  lying  at  my  feet,  to  the  various  rural 
occupations  of  the  living  beyond,  and  some  are  seen  milking 
the  cows,  feeding  the  lambs,  or  mowing  the  grass ;  others,  in 
the  distance,  are  gathering  in  and  stacking  the  hay,  while  the 
sun  setting  in  rich  splendour,  imparts  animation  and  loveliness 
to  the  whole.  Oh,  that  men  would  praise  the  Lord  for  His 
goodness !  And  oh,  that  these  things  did  more  elevate  my 
heart  to  Him,  the  Giver  of  all  good  !  And  yet,  after  all,  this 
is  not  my  rest,  blessed  be  God. 

"  I  have  just  returned  from  a  visit  to  my  poor  pilgrim.  I 
walked  softly  in,  and  found  her  with  her  glasses  on,  attentively 
reading  a  book  she  had  upon  her  lap.  '  What  are  you  read- 
ing ?  '  I  inquired.  '  The  Shepherd,  ma'am  ;  the  Shepherd  who 
laid  down  his  life  for  the  sheep,'  looking  up  into  my  face  with 
an  expression  of  sweet  peace  and  content.  I  replied,  '  Yes, 
and  for  you  and  for  me  too,  if  we  are  His  sheep.'  It  was  one 
of  the  sermons  of  the  good  old  divine  I  mentioned,  and  the 
dear  aged  saint  was  feasting  upon  the  precious,  sterling  truths 
it  contained.  I  found  another  excellent  work  in  her  rich  li- 
brary :  '  Boston's  Four-fold  State.'  I  said,  '  Have  you  dined  ? ' 
'Yes.'  'What  have  you  had?'  'Boiled  milk.'  This,  I 
found,  was  her  chief  diet ;  and  oh,  how  happy  she  is  !  She 
says  she  is  happier  than  the  rich  or  the  mighty  in  their  palaces, 
and  from  my  heart  I  beheve  it.  The  squire  is  kind  to  her, 
and  has  lent  her  a  little  garden  in  a  field,  which  her  attentive 
and  dutiful  son  cultivates  for  her." 

"  I  went  last  evening  to  see  another  aged  pilgrim ;  but  mark 
7 


146  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

the  diflference.  This  good  woman  ^for  I  have  little  doubt  but 
that  she  is  one)  is  abounding  with  all  the  comforts  of  life. 
She  is  a  widow,  w^ith  two  industrious  sons,  and  one  kind 
daughter.  She  has  a  nice  house,  comfortable  farm,  and  every- 
thing to  make  her  happy.  But  she  is  f;ir  from  being  so.  For 
although  I  believe  her  to  be  a  child  of  God,  she  is  constantly 
harassed  with  the  idea  that  she  has  grieved  away  the  Spirit, 
and  will  be  lost  for  ever.  This,  I  believe,  has  arisen  from  bad 
teaching  and  disease  of  body.  I  have  endeavoured  to  cheer 
her  up  by  leading  her  to  look  more  fully  to  Christ  than  to  her- 
self. I  sat  with  her  last  evening  for  nearly  an  hour,  and  found 
it  refreshing  to  my  soul  to  speak  of  Jesus." 

"  E writes  me  that  he  has  had  two  boroughs  offered  to 

him,  but  I  have  urged  him  not  to  stand.  The  country  is  in  a 
state  of  ferment  at  present.  The  new  accession  to  the  throne 
involves  a  new  Parliament,  and  the  Tories  are  straining  every 
point  to  secure  as  many  Conservatives  as   possible.     In  the 

evening  G drove  me  in  his  phaeton  to  Alexton   Hall, 

where  we  took  tea  with   Mrs.  W ,  who  was  alone.     We 

had  a  long  conversation  on  religion  and  Christian  experience, 
and  stayed  until  a  late  hour.  What  a  mercy  that  Jesus  is 
everything  to  me !  Truly  in  Him  I  live,  and  move,  and  have 
my  being.  He  is  around  about  my  path  by  day  and  by  night, 
and  my  soul  rejoices  in  God  my  Saviour.  The  sun  is  just  set- 
ting, and  looks  beautiful  as  it  casts  its  fading  beams  upon  the 
tall  trees  and  green  fields  ere  it  bids  us  good-night.  The  birds, 
too,  are  chirping  their  evening  song  before  they  fold  their  lit- 
tle heads  beneath  their  wing  for  rest. 

'  The  ploughman  homeward  plods  his  weary  way, 
And  leaves  the  world  to  darkness  and  to  me.' 

So  I  learned  in  younger  days  at  school.  Nearly  a  dozen  have 
just  passed  the  garden  gate,  each  with  a  bundle  of  sticks  upon 
his  shoulders,  to  kindle  a  cheerful  blaze  when  he  gets  home, 
ere  he  lays  his  jaded  limbs  to  rest.  The  sleep  of  a  labouring 
man  is  sweet. 

"  Here  and  there  I  find  a  humble  soul  in  a  thatched  cottage, 
who  but  few  know,  but  who  are  the  lowly  and  hidden  fol- 
lower's of  the  meek  and  despised  Saviour.  I  rode  on  horse- 
back the  other  day  to  the  adjoining  village ;  and  while  G 

went  on  some  miles  further,  I  alighted  at  a  good  man's  dwel- 
ling, the  front  of  which  was  covered  with  roses   trailed  up 


VILLAGE   SCENES.  147 

against  the  wall,  and  went  in,  and  passed  two  or  three  hours 
with  him  and  his  aged  wife  very  happily.  They  offered  me 
the  best  their  house  afforded,  which  was  a  glass  of  cowslip 
wine.  I  seated  myself  on  their  sofa  in  a  nice  little  parlour, 
where  everything  indicated  neatness  and  industry,  with  a  wide 
window  in  front,  of  small  panes  of  glass,  but  tastefully  orna- 
mented with  clusters  of  fresh-blown  roses  on  the  outside.  Here 
I  sat  and  talked  of  Christ,  while  the  dear  old  man  (his  eyes 
filled  with  tears)  echoed  to  his  wife,  who  was  deaf,  what  I  had 
said  to  him  from  time  to  time.  I  had  much  profitable  conver- 
sation with  them.  The  good  man  said  at  parting,  '  Oh,  ma'am, 
you  do  not  know  how  comforting  this  visit  has  been  to  me.' 

When  G returned,  I  mounted  my  horse,  promising  to  see 

them  again,  and  galloped  home  to  the  vicarage." 

"Yesterday  was  the  Sabbath.  G preached  an  excel- 
lent discourse.  He  took  for  his  subject  the  anxiety  of  Zac- 
cheus  to  see  Jesus  as  he  passed  by.     He  drew  some  excellent 

ideas  from  it,  and  the  application  was  good.     Dear  E has 

been  greatly  blessed  in  her  labours  in  the  school.  Her  thorough 
and  effective  method  of  discipline,  blended  with  so  much  win- 
ning softness,  has  produced  a  complete  revolution  for  the  bet- 
ter. You  can  form  no  idea  how  promptly  the  children  obey, 
and  yet  how  tenderly  they  love  her.  She  has,  with  the  aid  of 
the  mistress,  made  the  mode  of  instruction  so  interesting,  that 
the  parents  could  not,  if  they  were  so  inclined,  detain  their 
children  at  home.  Yesterday  they  were  brought  to  the  vicar- 
age,  and    underwent  a  private    examination  previous  to  the 

pubHc  one,  which  takes  place  next  week.     G examined 

them  on  two  chapters  of  the  Bible ;  and  it  was  pleasing  to  hear 
how  well  they  answered,  while  his  observations  were  instruc- 
tive and  solemn.     They  then  sung  their  hymns,  accompanied 

by  E on  the  piano.     The   chapters  on  which  they  were 

questioned  were  the  18th  and  19th  of  the  Gospel  of  John  :  and 
as  I  sat  in  an  adjoining  room,  listening  to  the  sufferings  of  the 
Redeemer,  and  the  unheard-of  ignominy  heaped  upon  the 
matchless  Son  of  God,  the  effect  on  my  mind  was  such  that  I 
could  not  recover  my  spirits  the  whole  evening," 

"  G 's  ministry  seems  much  blessed.     There   is  in  his 

preaching  a  rich  savour  of  the  Divinity  of  Christ.  He  insists 
constantly  and  earnestly  upon  the  Godhead  of  Jesus,  as  the 
'everlasting  Father,'  as  'the  mighty  God;'  and  this  imparts 
such  strength  and  consolation  to  the  soul,  that  my  heart  has 
often  been  refreshed  in  a  way  that  I  little  expected  " 


148  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

"  '  How  sweet,'  as  dear  Mrs.  Winslow* 
expressions  of  love  from  strangers,  who  show  them,  not  for  our 
sakes,  but  for  Christ's  sake.'  It  emanates  from  the  fulness  of 
His  love.  All  the  affection  of  Christian  friends  is  the  result 
of  His  overflowing  heart — ^just  as  the  beams  which  scatter 
light  and  Avarmth  around  us  flow  from  the  sun,  the  great  centre. 
He  inclines  them  to  love  us,  and  do  us  good  for  His  sake.  I 
have  felt  to-day  much  blessedness  in  viewing  the  Lord  as  my 
own  and  only  Friend  on  earth  and  in  heaven ;  and  making  a 
renewed  surrender  of  my  whole  heart  to  Him,  desiring  above 
all  earthly  good  that  it  should  be  moulded  according  to  His 
will,  and  made  conformable  to  His  likeness.  I  feel  much  of 
the  blessedness  of  one  who  is  emptied  of  all  confidence  in  him- 
self, feeling  there  is  nothing  in  him  of  his  own,  but  Avhat  he 
hates,  who  yet  in  the  midst  of  all  this  poverty  finds  he  has  a 
store  of  incalculable  riches  in  another,  and  that  one  is  God  in 
our  nature — the  God-man.  Christ  is  everything  to  me — I 
could  not  live  without  Him,  I  could  not  die  without  Him,  and 
heaven  would  be  no  heaven  to  me,  if  my  Beloved  were  not 
there." 

"Dear ,  I  think  your  trials  have  been  sanctified  to  me, 

as  well  as  to  yourself;  for  they  have  kept  me  in  close  contact 
with  God,  and  have  brought  me  into  more  of  His  real  charac- 
ter, not  only  as  to  what  He  is  to  His  redeemed,  but  also  as  to 
what  He  is  in  Himself.  Is  He  a  good  God  ?  He  is  goodness. 
Is  His  name  love  ?  He  is  love.  Is  He  faithful  ?  He  is  faith- 
fulness. Is  He  the  true  God  ?  He  is  truth^  and  therefore 
cannot  lie." 

After  spending  thus  happily  and  profitably  some  months  at 
Tugby,  she  left  amidst  the  general  and  affectionate  regrets  of 
the  kind-hearted  villagers.  One  of  her  letters  thus  pictures 
the  parting  scene  : — 

"  We  left  Tugby,  followed  by  a  weeping  tribe  of  the  chil- 
dren and  cottagers.  You  would  have  supposed  they  were 
parting  with  the  dearest  friend  on  earth.  The  school  was 
let  out  sooner  than  usual,  to  bid  us  good-bye  at  the  Vicar- 
age;  and  although  most  of  them  were  forbidden  to  follow, 
when  we   reached   the  turnpike-gate   they    were    there,    and 

E was  surrounded  with  tears  from  the  young,  and  with 

blessings  from  the  old.     There  we  left  the   girls ;  but  at  the 

*  Mrs.  Harriet  Winslow,  of  the  American  Mission  in  Ceylon. 


SERIOUS    ILLNESS.  149 

end  of  the  field  there  was  another  cluster  waiting  to  say  good- 
bye, and  the  boys  ran  after  the  carriage  as  far  as  they  could.  I 
have  never  before  seen  such  an  exhibition  of  tender  feeling  and 
afiection  from  people  who  but  a  few  months  ago  were  perfect 
strangers." 

On  her  return  to  town,  she  was  seized  with  the  prevailing 
epidemic  which  carried  off  so  many  hundreds,  but  in  mercy 
her  valuable  life  was  spared,  God  having  yet  a  work  to 
accomplish  in  and  by  her. 

"Since  I  last  wrote  I  have  been  very  near  eternity,  but  the 
Lord  rebuked  the  fever,  and  I  am  able  to  sit  up  for  a  few 
minutes  at  a  time.  It  was  the  influenza  in  its  most  powerful 
form.  The  Lord,  out  of  His  own  kind  heart,  put  kindness  in 
all  around  me.  My  mind,  during  those  few  days  and  nights 
of  suffering,  was  in  a  very  peculiar  state.  I  could  not  pray, 
or  even  think.  I  could  only  say,  and  at  intervals,  'Lord, 
have  mercy  upon  me,  and  heal  me.'  The  whole  power  of 
mind  seemed  prostrated  at  once.  I  thought,  Oh,  if  I  had  left 
the  salvation  of  my  soul  to  this  moment,  I  should  have  been 
lost.  Good  Mr.  D.  once  ventured  to  inquire  the  state  of  my 
mind,  I  recollect  saying,  'It  is  in  a  cloud,  but  my  hope  does 
not  depend  upon  my  feelings,  but  upon  Christ,  upon  God.' 

"While  I  sit  writing,  I  see  opposite  to  me  two  mutes  stand- 
ing at  a  door.  It  is  the  funeral  of  an  individual  who  died  of 
the  same  disease  from  w^hich  a  gracious  God  has  raised  me  up. 
He  was  a  healthy  man,  but  death  had  a  commission,  and  he 
has  appeared  before  the  judgment-seat  of  Christ.  I,  like  the 
barren  fig-tree,  have  been  spared  a  little  longer,  through  the 
intercession  of  a  precious  Saviour,  that  I  may  bring  forth  more 
fruit  to  His  glory.     I  have  just  sent  a  note  of  inquiry  to  dear 

Mrs.  R ,  for  I  feel  anxious  to  know  how  they  are.     Every 

day  will  appear  a  year  to  them  as  the  time  draws  near  for  their 
return  to  IBrooklyn.  God  grant  they  may  find  all  well  at 
home,  and  then  it  will  be  a  happy  time  indeed,  I  think  it  is 
good  sometimes  to  leave  those  we  love,  that  we  may  taste  the 
sweetness  of  meeting  again.  How  many  of  these  happy 
meetings  have  I  had  in  my  time !  It  is  almost  all  over  now\ 
But,  oh!  the  meeting  in  heaven!  that  w411  be  the  best  of  all. 
Oh,  may  God,  in  His  rich  mercy,  grant  that  I  may  meet  all, 
all  that  He  has  given  me,  and  all  I  love  on  earth,  at  His  right 
hand  at  that  great  day,  I  know  you  will  say,  Amen  and 
amen !" 


150  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

How  heart  searching  and  solemn,  yet  how  true  and  precious, 
are  the  following  thoughts: — 

"  I  have  often  thought  that,  although  God  did  so  convince 
you  of  sin  as  to  make  you  flee  into  the  very  bosom  of  Christ, 
yet  you  have  never  been  led  much  into  the  depth  of  the 
hidden  evil.  You  have  still  to  be  led  into  the  great  chamber 
of  imagery.  Oh,  the  aboundings  of  sin  there  which  no  eye 
discerneth  but  God's  until  He,  by  increasing  light,  declares  it 
to  us  little  by  little !  How  have  I  to  mourn  and  weep  before 
Him,  while  He  shows  me  to  myself — poor,  wretched,  sinful, 
and  yet  washed  and  justified  from  all  things  !  What  can  I  say 
to  these  tilings?  Love  abounding, — grace  subduing, — blood- 
cleansing, — Jesus  pardoning, — the  Spirit  renewing, — God  re- 
conciled; and  all  this  mighty  work  for  one  so  vile,  so  worth- 
less, so  hell-deserving  !     Dear ,  watch,  as  with  a  jealous 

eye  for  God's  glory,  every  hidden  spring  of  action.  Look  to 
your  thoughts  and  motives;  and  while  you  do  this,  keep  your 
eye  upon  the  cross  of  Christ,  and  you  need  not  fear  to  see 
yourself  as  you  are.  Tliis  is  the  Spirit's  w^ork  alone,  and  this 
only  Avill  make  us  go  softly  all  our  days." 

The  tender  and  prayerful  interest  with  which  she  viewed 
the  accession  of  the  present  Sovereign  to  the  throne,  was  in 
beautiful  keeping  with  the  benevolent  feelings  of  her  spiritual 
and  enlarged  mind.  Called,  in  the  providence  of  God,  to  a 
position  of  great  responsibility,  and  at  an  age  so  tender,  the 
young  Queen  became  an  object  of  her  liveliest  and  holiest 
sympathies.  Frequently  has  she  been  known  to  pour  forth 
the  most  fervent  intercessions  on  her  behalf,  especially  praying 
that,  next  to  her  own  personal  interest  in  the  salvation  of  God, 
she  might  have  grace  vouchsafed  faithfully  to  maintain  the  true 
Protestantism  of  this  land.  She  also  formed  one  of  a  little  circle 
of  Christian  ladies  who,  in  different  places,  and  at  a  given  time, 
met  in  concert  to  pray  for  their  Queen.  In  one  of  her  letters, 
she  relates  this  touching  incident  of  the  youthful  Sovereign  : — 

"Just  as  the  Princess  Victoria  came  of  age,  the  King  was 
suddenly  taken  ill,  and  a  few  weeks  after  died.  I  heard  an 
interesting  anecdote  of  the  young  Queen.  The  first  death- 
warrant  that  Lord  Melbourne  presented  for  her  signature,  she 
said,  'And  must  I  sign  it?'  and  burst  into  tears.  He  replied, 
'Your  Majesty  has  the  power  of  mitigating  the  sentence  to 
transportation  for  life.'  She  instantly  exclaimed,  'Oh,  then, 
let  it  be ;  and  transport  him.'     This  looked  lovely." 


THE   QUEEN.  151 

Her  Christianity  was  liiglily  perceptive,  and  her  religious 
character,  consequently,  singularly  practical.  It  was  the  testi- 
mony of  David,  when  referring  to  his  own  experience,  "I 
esteem  all  thy  precepts  to  be  right."  Such,  in  truth,  might 
have  been  her  language  of  wliom  we  speak.  With  an  en- 
larged heart,  she  ran  the  Avay  of  God's  commandments,  finding 
in  their  keeping  great  reward.  But  there  was  especially  one 
divine  precept  by  whose  clear  and  holy  light  she  conscientiously 
and  undeviatingly  walked ;  the  apostolic  injunction,  "  Owe  no 
man  anything^'"  was  the  precept  to  which  we  refer.  It  was 
her  principle  never  to  incur  debt,  upon  any  pretence  or  under 
any  circumstances  whatever.  She  would  make  no  purchase 
which  she  was  not  prepared  to  meet,  and  was  always  uneasy 
in  the  recollection  of  the  smallest  claim  undischarged.  And 
when  deprived  of  affluence,  and  combating  with  limited  re- 
sources, a  large  and  expensive  family  dependent  upon  her,  she 
had  the  strength  of  character  and  the  grace  of  heart  never  at 
any  period  to  allow  her  expenditure  to  exceed  her  income.  It 
was  thus  the  grace  of  God  enabled  her  to  guide  her  affairs 
with  discretion,  and  to  provide  things  honestly,  not  only  in 
the  sight  of  the  Lord,  but  also  in  the  sight  of  m^en.  By  a 
strict,  conscientious  observance  of  this  divine  rule,  she  was 
not  only  enabled  to  "render  unto  all  their  due,"  but  also  to 
contribute  liberally  of  her  substance  to  the  cause  of  God,  and 
to  the  necessities  of  Christ's  flock.  She  refers  to  this  subject 
in  the  following  extract: — 

"28th.  was  speaking  to  me  about  purchasing  a  ; 

but  I  really  thought  that,  under  existing  circumstances,  it  had 
better  not  be.  A  thing  like  this,  which  one  might  do  without, 
ought  to  be  let  alone.  That  sweet  precept  which  God  laid 
upon  my  heart  in  the  commencement  of  my  dreary  widowhood, 
He  has  enabled  me  strictly  to  keep:  Owe  no  man  anything^ 
hut  to  love  one  another.  If  in  debt,  which  I  never  allowed 
myself  to  be,  I  should  have  thought  nothing  was  at  my  own 
disposal  until  I  had  honestly  paid  that  debt.  I  have  endeav- 
oured faithfully  to  impress  the  same  upon  the  minds  of  all  my 
children,  entreating  them  rather  to  live  on  the  lowliest  fare 
than  incur  claims  which  they  have  no  power  to  meet.  It  is 
as  much  a  command  of  God  as  any  other,  and  woe  be  to  us  if 
we  disobey  it.  God  will  chasten  us  if  we  do;  and  we  shall 
find  that  what  is  withheld,  justly  due  to  another,  He  is  able  to 
take  from  us,  and  make  the  sweetest  ingredient  of  our  cup 


152  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

bitter  as  gall.  Let  us  -walk  in  this  lioly  precept  of  the  gospel, 
and  there  is  then  nothing  to  fear.  Let  us  often  look  back  upon 
all  the  way  our  God  has  led  us,  and  trace  His  gracious  dealings 
at  every  step;  and  we  shall  not  only  acknowledge  that  He  is 
good,  but  we  shall  aim  more  and  more  to  do  everything  that 
is  right  and  pleasing  in  His  sight.  Oh,  for  more  grace,  more 
uprightness  of  heart,  and  more  singleness  of  eye !  It  is  with 
God  we  have  to  do,  and  not  with  man." 

"  Dec.  24th. — I  have  to  recount  the  goodness  and  unfailing 
mercy  of  my  good  and  gracious  God,  who  has  brought  me 
thus  far  on  my  weary  pilgrimage.  I  have  to  lament  my  un 
faithfulness  and  backslidings  of  heart  from  Him.  This  has 
been  a  year  full  of  especial  mercies.  Yet  I  do  not  feel  my 
heart,  as  I  could  wish,  going  out  towards  God.  I  desire  the 
renewed  anointing  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  and  am  looking  up  for 
this  blessing.  Nothing  can  satisfy  me  without  it.  An 
indwelling  God  ;  the  water  springing  up  into  eternal  life ;  the 
constant  and  abiding  presence  of  Christ, — this  is  what  I  want, 
and  for  this  I  pray." 

"Jan.  26th. — Feel  much  nearness  to  God.  Can  tell  Him 
all  that  is  in  my  heart, — all  my  wants, — and  feel  that  Jesus 
hears  me.  I  am  directed  to  carry  my  small  as  well  as  great 
things  to  Christ ;  everything  that  troubles,  be  it  what  it  may. 
Satan  contends  with  me  here,  so  that  at  times  I  feel  almost 
ashamed  of  troubling  the  God  of  heaven  with  such  poor  trifles; 
but  I  recollect  that  a  sparrow  falls  not  to  the  ground  without 
His  notice,  and  I  am  encouraged :  God  gives  me  faith,  and  I 
conquer  the  arch-enemy  of  souls." 

"The  way  to  God  has  seemed  to  me  of  late  so  dehghtful,  so 
exactly  suited  to  a  poor  lost  sinner, — so  suited  to  me.  A  way 
sprinkled  with  atoning  blood ;  justice  and  mercy  as  a  wall  of 
defence  on  either  side ;  and  this  way  leading  to  such  a  rich 
treasure-house,  filled  with  all  blessing  for  time  and  for  eternity. 
All  is  in  Jesus  the  way  to  God,  the  way  of  holiness,  the  way 
to  glory. 

"  Sweet  the  moments,  rich  in  blessing, 
Which  before  the  cross  I  spend  ; 
Life,  and  healtli,  and  peace  possessing, 
Prom  the  sinner's  dying  Friend." 

"16th. — The  dear  Redeemer  continues  to  lift  up  upon  me 
the  light  of  his  countenance.     But  with  all  this  matchless  love, 


CHRISTIAN   EXPERIENCE   DEVELOPED.  153 

I  have  been,  and  still  am,  tried  with  earthly  wa.ndering  thoughts. 
While  in  the  body  we  cannot  escape  the  worid  ;  though  clois- 
tered from  it,  the  god  of  this  world  would  still  follow  and 
harass  us  as  much  as  he  is  permitted,  in  order  to  show  us  our 
weakness,  and  the  long-sufiering  patience  of  our  God  towards 
us." 

"Feb.  29th. — Yesterday  I  completed  my  sixty-second  year. 
Few  and  evil  have  been  the  days  of  the  years  of  my  pilgrim- 
age. To  Jacob's  words  I  can  add  this  testimony, — goodness 
and  mercy  have  followed  me  all  my  days,  and  I  am  longing 
to  praise  and  bless  His  holy  name,  who  has  done  great  things 
for  me  and  mine,  although  we  have  not  returned  Him  accord- 
ing to  His  goodness.  I  look  back,  and  sigh,  and  grieve,  and 
think  how  many  evils  I  could  have  avoided  with  my  present 
experience.  I  think  and  feel  more  and  more  the  exceeding 
sinfulness  of  sin,  and  my  own  w^eakness  and  inability  to  stand 
one  moment  without  the  all-upholding  arm  of  Jehovah-Jesus. 
How  needful  are  trials,  and  how  precious  then  the  sweet  prom- 
ises of  the  gospel ! " 

"  It  is  wondrous  bow  God,  when  we  wander  from  Ilim, 
Our  fears  and  afflictions  can  double ; 
And  then  comfort  impart  to  tlie  sorrowful  hearty 
That  we  never  could  know  but  in  trouble. 

"  Thus  faith  in  the  dark,  is  pursuing  its  mark 
Through  many  sharp  trials  of  love, 
In  this  sorrowful  waste  which  the  Christian  must  pass 
To  the  heavenly  Canaan  above." 

"  22nd. — God  is  love,  and  His  mercy  endureth  forever :  this 
my  soul  knows  to  be  true.  I  w  ould  be  holy,  even  as  He  is 
holy.  My  heart  longs  for  full  sanctification.  I  am  wearied 
with  sin ;  my  soul  loathes  it,  and  I  abhor  myself  in  dust  and 
in  ashes.  Truly,  I  tuould  not  live  alway.  Heaven  would  be 
greatly  to  be  desired,  were  it  only  to  have  done  w4th  sin  for 
ever.  But  oh,  the  presence  of  Jesus  in  all  His  glories,  unveil- 
ed to  our  wondering  eye,  will  make  our  happiness  complete. 
0  earth,  earth !  let  my  heart's  best  affections  go,  and  trouble 
me  no  more.  I  want  this  heart  only  for  Christ !  It  is  His  by 
the  purchase  of  His  blood ;  it  is  His  by  the  conquest  of  His 
grace ;  and  I  covet  it  all  for  Him.  Oh,  that  every  throb  may 
beat  with  love,  gratitude,  and  adoration  to  Him  who  has  saved 
my  soul,  and  redeemed  me  from  the  power  of  the  enemy ! 
Amen  and  amen." 
7* 


154:  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

•'  I  would  not  live  alway — live  alway  below  I 

Oh  no,  I'll  not  linger  when  bidden  to  go. 

The  days  of  our  pilgrimao-e  granted  us  here 

Are  enough  for  life's  woes,  full  enough  for  its  cheer. 

Would  I  shrink  from  the  path  which  the  prophets  of  God, 

Apostles  and  Martyrs,  so  joyfully  trod ! 

"While  brethren  and  friends  are  all  hastening  home, 

Like  a  spirit  unblest  o'er  the  earth  would  I  roam  ? 

*'  I  would  not  live  alway — I  ask  not  to  stay, 
Where  storm  after  storm  rises  dark  o'er  the  way ; 
Where,  seeking  for  peace,  we  but  hover  around, 
Like  the  patriarch's  bird,  and  no  resting  is  found  ; 
Where  hope,  when  she  paints  her  gay  bow  in  the  air. 
Leaves  its  brilliance  to  fade  in  the  night  of  despair, 
And  joy's  fleeting  angel  ne'er  sheds  a  glad  ray. 
Save  the  gleam  of  the  plumage  that  bears  him  away. 

"  I  would  not  live  alway — thus  fettered  by  sin. 
Temptation  without  and  corruption  within  ; 
In  a  moment  of  strength,  if  I  sever  the  chain, 
Scarce  the  victory's  mine  ere  I'm  captive  again. 
E'en  the  rapture  of  pardon  is  mingled  with  fears, 
And  my  cup  of  thanksgiving  with  penitent  tears. 
The  festival  trump  calls  for  jubilant  songs, 
But  my  spirit  her  own  miserere  prolongs. 

"  I  would  not  live  alway — no,  welcome  the  tomb  ! 
Since  Jesus  hath  lain  there,  I  dread  not  its  gloom ; 
Where  He  deign'd  to  sleep.  I'll  too  bow  my  head ; 
Oh  !  peaceful  the  slumbers  on  that  hallow'd  bed. 
And  then  the  glad  dawn  soon  to  follow  that  night, 
When  the  sunrise  of  glory  shall  beam  on  my  sight, 
When  the  full  matin  song,  as  the  sleepers  arise 
To  shout  in  the  morning,  shall  peal  through  the  skies. 

"  Who,  who  would  live  alway— away  from  his  God, 
Away  from  yon  heaven,  that  blissful  abode, 
Where  the  rivers  of  pleasure  flow  o'er  the  bright  plains, 
And  the  noontide  of  glory  eternally  reigns ; 
Where  the  saints  of  all  ages  in  harmony  meet. 
Their  Saviour  and  brethren  transported  to  greet; 
Where  the  songs  of  salvation  exultingly  roll, 
And  the  smile  of  the  Lord  is  the  feast  of  the  soul ; 

"  That  heavenly  music !  what  is  it  I  hear? 
The  notes  of  the  harpers  ring  sweet  in  the  air ; 
And  see,  soft  unfolding,  those  portals  of  gold ! 
The  King,  all  array'd  in  his  beauty,  behold  ! 
Oh,  give  me,  oh,  give  me  the  wings  of  a  dove, 
Let  me  hasten  my  flight  to  those  mansions  above. 
Ay,  'tis  now  that  my  soul  on  swift  pinions  would  soar, 
And  in  ecstasy  bid  earth  adieu  evermore." 

Rev.  Dr.  Muhlkxbtjrg. 


MRS.  HAWKES. — MR.  CECIL. — MR.  NEWTON.  155 


TO    HER   SON    0- 


"...  If  you  can  obtain  the  Memoir  of  Mrs.  Hawkes,  writ- 
ten by  Miss  Cecil,  do  so,  and  read  it.  It  is  republished  in 
America,  with  an  Introduction,  I  think,  by  Washington  Irving. 
Miss  Cecil  is  a  delightful  Christian.  I  had  a  long  interview 
with  her  after  I  read  the  book.  To-day  I  called  on  her,  and 
was  introduced  in  the  drawing-room,  and  sat  in  the  very  chair 
where  good  Mr.  Cecil,  Newton,  and  Simeon  once  sat.  It  is 
the  same  house  which  Mr.  Cecil  occupied  for  forty  or  fifty 
years,  and  around  the  walls  are  hung  numerous  portraits  of 
good  men,  his  and  Mr.  Newton's  among  the  rest.  It  was  a 
treat  of  no  ordinary  kind, — a  feast  of  the  soul.  These  are 
now  before  the  throne  in  glory.  Once  they  were  like  us,  tried, 
tempted,  and  often  sorrowing ;  but  now  they  are  reaping  the 
rich  reward  of  all  their  labours." 

"I  smiled  at  your  idea  of  my  arranging  my  thoughts  on 
given  subjects  when  I  address  my  children.  Why,  I  never 
know  what  I  am  going  to  write,  until  I  take  up  my  pen,  and 
then  I  give  full  licence  to  my  ideas  as  they  flow ;  and,  as  it 
happens,  the  Lord  seems  to  direct ;  for  I  believe  in  general, — 
at  least  so  some  of  my  correspondents  say, — what  I  write 
comes  just  in  season;  but  let  that  be  as  it  may,  it  comes  in 
season  from  my  heart.  Once  formality  shows  its  ugly  phiz, 
away  would  go  all  I  would  wish  to  say.  When  I  write  to 
Christians  in  trial,  I  am  often  comforted  with  the  comfort  I  am 
endeavouring  to  impart  to  others.  The  same  in  conversation. 
Were  I  a  minister,  perhaps  this  would  be  my  favourite  sub- 
ject.  But  the  Lord  has  not  called  me  to  chat  office,  so  you 
must  take  me  just  as  you  find  me  ;  for  I  am  too  old  now  to  mend 
my  ways  in  that  respect ;  but  I  will  try  and  bear  in  mind  what 

you  say  when  I  write  to .     Pray  will  you  choose  a  text 

for  me  when  I  next  write  to  you  ,^" 

"I  have  been  feasting  upon  the  memoir  of  Dr.  Payson,  He 
seems,  however,  to  have  looked  too  much  to  frames  and  feel' 
ings,  and  as  they  ebbed  and  flowed,  his  faith  did  the  same, 
and  this  caused  him  so  much  distress,  and  wore  out  his  health. 
Sensible  enjoyments  are  very  desirable,  but  they  are  not 
Christ.  Faith  in  the  dark  puts  honour  on  God,  and  the  more 
we  know  of  His  faithfulness,  the  more  will  cur  peace  flow  as 
a  river  that  never  changes  its  course,  ^here  is  al-svays  SQme» 
thing  wrong  when  He  hides  I^is  face  j  but,  after  all,  He  re' 


156  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

mains  the  same,  and  we  must  come  to  Him  again  as  poor 
sinners.  If  we  confess  our  sins,  He  is  faitlful  and  just  to  for- 
give us  6ur  sins,  and  to  cleanse  us  from  all  unrighteousness.  Con- 
fession of  sin  is  a  liolj  strengthening  exercise,  and  brings  a 
sweet  blessing  to  the  soul.  Never  let  us  keep  guilt  upon  the 
conscience.  The  Fountain  is  always  open  to  us;  and  we 
should  not  leave  a  throne  of  grace  until  we  have  a  sense  of 
pardon  through  the  fresh  application  of  his  blood.  Have  no 
concealments  from  God." 

"  25th. — Such  a  sermon  from  Mr.  Evans !  His  mind  is 
gigantic,  and  so  deeply  spiritual.  The  world  to  him  is  noth- 
ing, and  God  first  and  everything.  He  lives  near  the  Lord, 
and  cares  neither  for  the  frown  nor  the  smile  of  man.  His 
ministry  has  been  much  blessed  to  me  of  late.     He  has  just 

parted  with  C ,  who  sailed  for  India   on  last   Saturday. 

His  trial — and  a  great  trial  it  was — lias  been  sanctified  to  his 
soul ;  and  he  preaches  like  a  man  standing  on  the  verge  of 
eternity,  and  in  full  view  of  heaven.  He  has  fled  into  the 
bosom  of  God  for  consolation,  and  has  found  it." 

"  4th, — I  wish  you  would  always  write  on  the  Monday,  and 
then  I  should  know  how  the  Lord  dealt  with  you  on  the  Sab- 
bath. We  had  a  feast  of  fat  things  yesterday.  I  think  Mr. 
E.  preaches  more  of  late  as  if  he  looked  full  into  eternity,  and 
saw  the  great  white  throne.  He  is  solemn,  powerful,  and 
often  awfully  true.  But  I  must  prepare  for  my  Bible  class, 
which  I  have  in  my  room.  They  all  seem  interested,  and  it  is 
quite  encouraging.  "We  are  going  on  with  the  'Pilgrim's  Pro- 
gress.' I  trust  I  had  sweet  nearness  to  God  this  morning  in 
family  worship.  I  was  reading  the  history  of  Asa  and  Je- 
hoshaphat,  and  could  trace  the  character  of  God  in  His  deal- 
ings with  them,  as  well  as  His  general  conduct  with  the  Old 
Testament  saints,  that  it  seemed  to  establish  my  soul  in  the 
truth,  enabling  me  to  feel  that  He  was  all  that  He  says  He 
is,  and  the  same  yesterday,  to-day,  and  forever.  Oh,  tliat  we 
may  walk  uprightly  before  Him,  and  watch  against  the  treach- 
erous  foe  we  carry  within  !" 

TO  HER  SON,   REV.  I.  D,  W ,   ON  MINISTERIAL  WORK. 

"  .  .  ,  I  long  to  hear  how  you  are,  and  whether  the  Lord 
is  blessing  you  with  His  presence :  without  it  this  ^^'orld  is  a 
desolate  wilderness  indeed,  I  fear  you  will  find  it  lonesome 
where  you  are;  but  if  the  Lord  gives  you  plenty  of  work  to 


MINISTERIAL   WORK.  157 

do  for  himself,  He  will  give  you  a  sweet  reward  for  your 
labour,  and  a  contented  mind  with  your  lot.  If  you  feel  you 
are  put  where  Jesus  would  have  you  to  be,  how  sweet  will  be 
the  thought !  It  will  repress  every  wish  to  be  elsewhere. 
How  delightful  to  live  to  please  Him,  and  Him  only,  who 
died  for  you  !  I  have  been  just  praying  for  you,  and  the  Lord 
blessedly  drew  my  heart  out.  I  have  prayed  that  you  may 
feel  increasingly  the  vast  responsibility  that  rests  upon  you  as 
a  messenger  of  the  Lord  of  Hosts,  and  that  you  may  continu- 
ally have  an  eye  to  that  great  day  when  you  must  render  up 
the  account  of  your  stewardship.  Oh  that  you  may  hear 
those  blessed  words.  Well  done  good  and  faithful  servant  !  I 
asked  the  Lord,  too,  to  speak  to  you,  and  to  speak  through 
you  to  the  people.  Remember,  before  you  fix  your  mind  upon 
a  text,  to  go  upon  your  knees  and  ask  your  Master  for  one.  If 
He  gives  you  one,  He  will  speak  by  it  to  you  and  your  flock. 
Oh,  you  know  not  what  a  blessing  will  always  attend  this 
childlike  faith  in  your  heavenly  Father.  Be  much  in  search- 
ing the  Scriptures,  for,  in  so  doing,  you  will  find  rich  food  for 
your  own  soul,  and  for  the  flock  over  which  the  Holy  Ghost 
hath  made  you  overseer.  If  you  have  only  a  dozen  poor 
people,  never  let  it  be  a  temptation  to  be  less  earnest  and  fer- 
vent in  your  preaching.  If  you  watch  the  wind,  you  will  not 
sow ;  but  keep  your  eye  upon  the  Lord  of  the  harvest,  and 
do  His  work  faithfully,  and  He  will  give  you  your  hire.  And 
may  God  bless  you  and  make  you  a  blessing ! " 

To  some  individuals  the  deep  searchings  of  heart,  in  which 
she  was  wont  to  indulge,  will  appear  almost  painful.  But 
those  searchings  marked  the  honesty  with  which  she  ever 
sought  to  walk  before  God.  And  yet  the  lowliest  estimate  she 
entertained  of  herself  was  always  accompanied  with  the  most 
exalted  views  of  Christ,  and  the  clearest  apprehension  of  her 
completeness  in  Him.  She  grew  downward,  and  so  brought 
forth  fruit  upward.  Like  the  banyan-tree,  whose  branches 
first  strike  down  into  the  earth  and  then  shoot  up  again,  she 
sank  into  a  deep  consciousness  of  her  helplessness  and  depend- 
ence, and  then,  as  from  the  lowest  depths  of  self-humiliation, 
she  rose  strong  in  faith,  glowing  with  love,  and  clinging  all  the 
more  closely  to  the  Saviour.  Such  would  seem  to  be  her  ex- 
perience, as  thus  portrayed  : — 

"A  note  from ,  inviting  me  to  meet  a  minister  and  his 

wife  who  were  on  a  visit  to  them.     But  I  do  not  feel  in  spirits 


158  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

to  meet  strangers.  I  need  a  refreshing  myself,  and  blessed  be 
God,  He  has  melted  my  heart  this  morning  with  sweet  con- 
trition, blended  with  holy  joy,  and  an  increasing  desire  to  live 
to  Him  and  for  Him,  w4io  is  all  and  everything  to  my  soul. 
Oh,  if  He  were  to  turn  from  me,  I  am  lost  for  ever.  This 
world,  with  the  dearest  earthly  creatures,  could  not  satisfy  my 
soul.  And  oh,  to  call  the  Creator,  the  Upholder  of  all  worlds, 
mine — yes,  inhie,  for  I  am  His,  and  He  is  mine,  and  that 
through  all  eternity — is  a  privilege  so  sweet  tliat  angels  might 
envy.  And  is  it  boasting  to  speak  boldly  of  these  things? 
And  yet  I  have  been  convinced,  on  examination,  that  in  what 
I  have  felt  it  a  duty  and  a  delight  to  tell  of  His  great  good- 
ness, there  was  much  of  self — hateful  self — insensibly,  at  the 
time,  that  has  laid  me  low  in  the  dust  before  God.  For  this 
cause  I  do  not  like  to  meet  wath  strangers  who  have  heard  of 
me  from  dear  friends,  who  themselves  are  willing  to  overlook 
ten  thousand  infirmities  and  imperfections,  because  they  love 
me.  They  do  not  know  me  as  I  know  m.yself,  and  as  God 
knows  me.  And  I  can  truly  say,  that  it  is  my  unspeakable 
comfort  that  He  does  know  me  altogether.  I  would  not  have 
one  thing  liidden  from  Him,  which  He  in  love  hides  from  the 
world.     Oh,  the  praise  due  to  His  restraining  grace! 

"  Last  evening  I  heard  a  stranger.  His  text  was  singular. 
And  Adam  called  his  icife's  name  Eve,  because  she  was  the 
mother  of  all  living.  He  remarked,  that  as  soon  as  Adam  and 
his  wife  ate  the  fruit,  in  disobedience  to  God's  command,  they 
died — spiritually  died.  God  preached  the  gospel  to  them 
while  in  this  awful  state,  and  by  the  light  of  His  Spirit  they 
were  enabled  to  believe  in  the  promised  seed  that  was  to 
bruise  the  serpent's  head.  He  first  showed  how  much  all 
names  then  had  a  significant  meaning.  Thus,  God  changed 
Abram  to  Abraham,  because  he  was  the  father  of  the  faithful. 
Jacob's  name  was  changed  to  Israel,  because,  as  a  friend,  he 
had  power  and  prevailed  with  God.  Eve  was  the  mother  of 
all  living,  who,  like  herself,  were  made  alive  in  Christ  Jesus. 
The  seed  of  the  serpent  could  not  have  been  included,  as  they 
were  always  dead,  dead  in  trespasses  and  in  sins.  Christ  M-as 
the  seed  of  the  woman,  and  all  the  members  of  the  body,  of 
which  He  was  the  head,  were  alive  in  him.  Of  these  Eve 
was  the  mother,  for  she  was  the  living  mother  of  all  made 
alive  in  Christ  Jesus,  This  sermon  was  full  of  Christ  through- 
out." 


MINISTERIAL    RESPONSIBILITY.  159 

"  Heard  Mr.  E on  Tuesday  evening.     Ought  I  not  to 

grow  in  grace,  and  in  the  knowledge  of  God  my  Saviour  ? 
But  oh,  how  slowly  I  advance  to  what  I  ought !  One  thing  I 
do  know, — I  feel  increasingly  my  own  vileness,  and  see  in- 
creasing beauty  in  the  gospel,  and  its  suitableness  to  the  wants 
of  a  poor  sinner.  God  shows  me  more  of  my  own  sinful  self, 
and  more  of  that  perfect  righteousness  in  Christ  Jesus,  which 
is  unto  all  and  upon  all  them  that  believe." 

"  Have  you  seen  '  Mammon,'  by  the  Rev.  Mr,  Harris  ?  It 
is  excellent.  The  next  best  essay  on  the  subject  was  by  a 
policeman,  who  wrote  it  while  on  his  rounds  in  the  night,  and 
by  the  light  of  the  lamp.  Mr.  Baptist  Noel  has  just  sent  out 
a  tract  on  the  '  Unity  of  the  Church.'  It  is  delightful.  There 
has  been  such  a  demand  for  it,  that  I  could  not  obtain  a  copy 
from  the  publisher  to  send  you.  How  needful  both  to  Church 
man  and  Nonconformist  is  such  a  work  just  now,  when  the 
members  of  Christ's  body  are  warring  against  each  other, — 
brother  against  brother,  and  that  before  unbelievers.  May 
God  bless  this  work  to  His  church,  and  raise  up  many  such 
faithful  heralds  of  the  cross,  to  warn  their  brethren  of  their 
evil  ways !  " 

TO    HER    SON,   REV.  G.  E.  W ,  ON    MINISTERIAL 

RESPONSIBILITY. 

"  .  .  .  Yesterday  was  the  Sabbath,  and  you,  I  trust, 
were  standing  up  in  your  great  Master's  name,  to  declare  the 
whole  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus,  The  more  I  think  upon  it,  the 
more  I  feel  the  vast,  the  weighty  responsibility  that  rests  upon 
the  minister  of  Christ.  I  look  through  a  series  of  years,  short 
and  uncertain,  to  the  judgment-seat,  and  there  behold  him 
the  first  to  render  an  account  of  his  stewardship.  Oh,  the  tre- 
mendous responsibility — the  care  of  precious  and  immortal 
souls !  And  when  I  remember  that  I  have  three  now  stand- 
ing in  this  all-important  position,  I  feel  a  trembling  lest  any  of 
you  should  come  short  at  last.  '  Be  faithful  unto  death.'  Be- 
ware lest  you  speak  peace  when  God  has  not  spoken  peace. 
Oh,  think  of  a  poor,  deceived  soul,  going  into  eternity,  fancy- 
ing all  is  well,  and  the  minister  helping  on  the  fatal  delusion 
from  want  of  faithfulness  and  obedience  to  the  command  of 
his  God.  Shrink  not  from  duty,  however  painful.  Let  all 
things  be  right  between  you  and  God,  It  would  be  well  to 
make  a  report  of  each  day's  work  to  God ;  and  although  you 


160  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

may  have  failed  in  many  things,  and  have  come  short  in  al^ 
you  will  yet  find  this  daily  exercise  sweet  and  profitable.  li 
will  preserve  tenderness  of  conscience,  and  have  a  sanctifying 
influence  upon  the  heart.  Never  forget  for  one  moment 
whose  you  are  or  whom  you  serve  ;  and  may  the  love  of 
Christ  constrain  you  to  diligence  and  devotedness  of  heart." 

Who  does  not  feel,  as  he  closes  the  preceding  extracts  from 
her  letters  to  her  children,  how  powerful  and  deathless  is  the 
influence  of  a  holy  mother !  That  influence  employed  in 
planting  the  first  seedlings  of  thought,  in  shaping  the  first  ac- 
tions of  childhood,  still  lives  to  instruct,  admonish,  and  cheer 
in  manhood's  riper  years.  Honoured  and  privileged  are  they, 
around  whose  toilsome  path  yet  lingers  a  spell  so  sacred,  a 
power  so  gentle,  and  a  charm  so  holy  and  persuasive.  The 
sepulchre  has  closed  in  silence  over  her ;  but  her  inspiration, 
vital,  and  balmy  as  the  breath  of  spring,  still  floats  over  life's 
dreary  way,  gladdening,  moulding,  and  guiding.  Thus  is  it 
that  Christianity  ennobles,  sanctifies,  and  immortalizes  all  the 
endeared  relations  of  life.  Beneath  its  embalming  power  the 
parental  relation  never  dies.  The  authority  to  which  as  chil- 
dren we  bowed  so  submissively,  in  later  life,  when  the  snow- 
flakes  of  time  have  frosted  our  brow,  still  lives  to  sway ;  and 
the  maternal  influence  which  shaped  our  youthful  step,  yet 
holds  us  in  its  deathless  enchantment. 

TO  HER    SON    0 . 

"  March  14th. — Lord  L is  expected  in  town  to-mor- 
row. He  has  just  lost  his  second  daughter,  a  most  interesting 
and  amiable  girl  of  fifteen.  She  died  a  week  ago,  in  Paris. 
I  grieve  and  sympathize  with  him  as  a  parent.  He  never  left 
her  bedside,  and  deeply  feels  her  loss.  I  pray  for  him,  and 
desire  that  his  heart  may  be  sustained,  and  his  affliction  may 
be  sanctified.  On  "Wednesday  morning,  Mr.  Evans  preached, 
in  Rowland  Hill's  pulpit,  the  annual  sermon  for  the  Baptist 
Missionary  Society.  He  was  most  excellent.  Surrey  Chapel 
was  excessively  crowded.  His  people  met  at  six  o'clock  that 
morning,  for  prayer  on  his  behalf.  Previous  to  his  undertak- 
ing this  service,  he  had  entered  with  much  earnestness  into 
the  missionary  cause,  and  regrets  he  had  so  long  stood  aloof 
from  it;  and  now  it  occupies  much  of  his  thoughts  and 
labours ;  in  fact,  it  has  enlisted  his  whole  heart.  This  even- 
ing they  meet  in  John  street,  to  form  a  missionary  auxih- 
ary." 


MRS.  HARRIET   WINSLOW.  161 

A  reference  in  the  foregoing  extract  suggests  the  remark, 
that  it  is  always  interesting  to  trace  an  important  result  to  its 
cause.  The  strong  sympathy  with  which  the  subject  of 
Christian  missions  was  now  regarded  by  Mr.  Ev^ans,  appears 
to  have  been  in  a  great  measure  awakened  by  the  perusal  of 
the  "Memoir  of  Mrs.  Harriet  Winslow,"  the  eminent  and  be- 
loved American  missionary  to  Ceylon.  Having  received  a 
copy  from  New  York,  Mrs.  Winslow  brought  it  nnder  the 
notice  of  her  pastor  in  the  following  letter,  addressed  to  the 
second  Mrs.  E. : — 

"...  My  dear  Friend,  I  want  you  to  get  the  memoir 
of  dear  Mrs.  Winslow,  the  missionary  who  died  not  long  ago 
in  India.  It  will  do  you  good.  She  was  a  most  devoted 
woman,  and  bright  example.  I  have  read  it  with  deep  inter- 
est. She  knew  your  dear  sister  in  India,  and  corresponded 
with  her.  Your  brother's  name  is  also  mentioned,  I  think 
that,  next  to  the  Bible,  the  lives  of  God's  dear  people,  their 
Christian  experience,  and  the  dealings  of  God  with  their  souls, 
is  most  profitable.  It  stirs  one  up  to  diligence,  and  to  press 
forward  to  great  things.  I  have  felt  more  than  ever,  since  I 
read  the  labours  of  this  dear  saint,  what  a  poor  unprofitable 
servant  I  am,  and  have  been  led  to  cry  to  the  Lord  for  more 
of  the  mighty  influence  of  His  Holy  Spirit.  Mrs.  Winslow 
mentions  the  Maternal  Association  formed  in  India,  and  God's 
especial  blessing  upon  it  in  answer  to  praying  mothers.  You 
will  see,  too,  that  revivals  are  not  confined  to  America,  but 
are  wherever  God  gives  a  wrestling  spirit  for  them,  and  His 
people  are  looking  out  for  the  fulfilment  of  His  promise.  It 
has  very  greatly  delighted  me  to  see  how  Christians  of  differ- 
ent denominations  live  and  cling  together  when  away  from 
home,  and  feel  they  are  engaged  in  one  common  cause.  The 
Church  of  England,  Presbyterians,  Baptists,  Wesleyan  mis- 
sionaries, all  aiding  each  other  in  this  blessed  work  and  labour 
of  love.     Oh,  for  hearts  full  of  the  love  of  Christ ! " 

She  again  more  distinctly  refers  to  the  happy  influence  of 
this  beautiful  and  soul-stirring  missionary  biography,  in  a  letter 
to  her  daughter-in-law  : — 

"  .     .     .     I  rejoice,  my  dear  A ,  that  you  are  both 

comfortable  and  happy,  and  believe  that  you  are  where  the 
Lord  would  have  you  be.  Oh,  that  you  may  return  accord- 
ing to  His  great  goodness,  and  trace  His  dear  hand  in  all  His 
tender,  gentle  deahngs.     Walk  doubly  close  to  Him  in  the  day 


162  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

of  prosperity,  and  watch  over  your  heart  with  a  jealous  eye, 
lest  it  prove  a  temptation  and  a  snare.  Time  is  short.  You 
have  mucli,  my  dear  daughter,  to  do  for  God  in  a  little  space. 
Eternity  will  be  quite  long  enough  to  rest.  Now  is  the  time 
for  honouring  God  ;  and  you  may  be  a  great  help  to  your  hus- 
band in  the  ministry  of  the  blessed  word.  Oh,  that  God  may 
keep  3^ou  both  faithful  to  His  work.  Read  dear  Mrs.  Harriet 
Winslow's  memoir.  I  am  sure  it  will  do  you  good.  It  was 
sent  to  me  and  I  lent  it  to  others.  Mr.  Evans  says  he  cannot 
be  thankful  enougli  that  I  ever  placed  it  in  his  hands.  It  has 
made  him  quite  an  ardent  missionary  at  home.  John-street  is 
now  a  missionary  church ;  and  already  one  of  their  own  num- 
ber is  going  forth  to  carry  the  glad  tidings  of  the  gospel  to  the 
heathen." 

Few  brighter  jewels  will  adorn  Harriet  Winslow's  crown 
than  this.*  To  have  been  instrumental  by  her  holy,  self-deny- 
ing labours  in  a  foreign  field,  long  after  she  had  passed  to  that 

*  Among  those  jewels  is  the  following : 

"  A  short  time  since,  tlieie  arrived  one  evening  in  a  small  village  in 
the  western  part  of  Indiana,  a  man  in  middle  life,  clad  in  the  garb  of  a 
sailor.  His  atidetie  form,  dark  eye.  and  death-like  paleness,  together 
with  the  peculiar  bearing  which  a  sailor  alone  possesses,  drew  around 
him  at  once  a  peculiar  interest.  He  had  spent  his  youth  and  early  man- 
hood on  the  ocean,  amid  the  toils  and  perils  of  a  sailor's  life.  He  had 
enjoj-ed,  in  one  of  the  New  England  States,  the  blessings  of  an  early 
education,  and  the  instruction  of  a  pious  mother.  But  that  mother  had 
long  belbre  gone  down  to  her  grave,  sorrowing  over  the  waywardness 
and  absence  other  wandering  sou;  while  he,  far  away  from  the  home  of 
his  childhood,  and  the  inttuence  of  a  mothers  prayers,  had  become  a 
reckless  and  ungodlj'-  sailor.  He  mingled  among  the  vicious  and  profane. 
He  forgot  his  mother's  warnings,  and  became  a  swearer  and  an  intidel. 
Broken  down  at  length,  by  the  excessive  toils  of  seafaring  life,  and  the 
intiueiice  of  the  burning  climes  he  had  traversed,  and  under  the  influence 
of  an  incurable  disease,  he  was  sinking  rapidl\'  to  the  grave.  He  had 
now  turned  his  face  to  his  own  native  shore,  and  on  the  evening  I  have 
mentioned  above,  had  arrived  at  the  hou^^e  of  an  only  sister  to  die. 

"  The  neighbours  and  friends  all  flocked  around  liim  to  see  and  hear 
a  son  of  the  ocean.  But  he  was  melancliol}'-  and  silent.  He  foresaw  the 
fate  that  awaited  him.  He  knew  tiiat  he  was  doomed  soon  to  die,  and 
to  enter  upon  tliat  dark  uncertain  future,  which  he  had  for  many  years 
tried  to  believe  to  l.e  only  a  phantom  of  tlie  imagination.  But  now  he 
had  no  un,t,''(j(l]y  eouipauions  about  him  to  laugh  away  his  fears.  His 
thoughts  ran  ba';k  to  his  early  life.  He  rememljered  the  warnings  and 
counsels  of  his  niotlier.  now  no  more.  He  called  to  mind  the  tracts  that 
had  been  given  him,  and  how  ho  had  slighted  the  faithful  admonitions 
he  had  reciivetl. 

"  Christian  friends  now  gathered  around  his  dving  bedside,  and  en- 


DEATHLESS    INFLUENCE.  163 

crown,  in  awakening  in  behalf  of  the  work  to  which  she  con- 
secrated her  youth,  and  in  which  she  sacrificed  her  hfe,  a  deep, 
earnest,  practical  sympatliy  in  the  heart  of  such  a  Christian  and 
such  a  minister,  and,  through  him,  of  influencing  hundreds  more 
with  a  zeal  for  Christ,  which  still  lives  and  acts,  is  an  honour 
before  which  earth's  proudest,  brightest  laurels  pale.  Such  is 
the  deathless  influence  and  the  reward  of  a  life  devoted  to  God ! 

deavoured  to  point  him  to  the  Redeemer  of  lost  mankind.  He  lingered 
on  for  weeks,  sometimes  in  the  agony  of  despair,  sometimes  buried  in 
the  most  melancholy  stupor:  at  length,  through  the  pardoning  mercy  of 
Christ,  he  found  peace  in  believing.  Tlien,  oh,  what  a  change  came  over 
his  whole  appearance.  A  smile  of  heavenly  joy  now  lighted  up  his  pallid 
features.  His  tongue  was  now  unloosed,  and  he  was  constantly  convers- 
ing with  those  around  him  of  the  preciousness  of  the  Saviour  he  liad  found. 

"  He  spoke,  too,  with  mingled  feelings  of  sorrow  and  interest,  of  the 
efforts  that  had  been  made  for  his  salvation  b}^  Christian  passengers  on 
board  his  ship  while  he  was  a  sailor.  He  took  particular  delight  in 
speaking  of  the  lamented  Harriet  Wixslow,  and  of  her  voyage  to  India, 
on  board  the  •  Indus,'  in  which  vessel  he  was  then  an  officer.  '  I  well 
remember,'  said  he,  his  dying  eye  brightening  with  animation, — '  I  well 
remember  that  devoted  missionary  band,  who  then  sailed  to  their  tield 
of  labour  in  our  vessel.  ^Irs.  Wixslow,  in  particular,  I  can  never  forget. 
She  was  so  kind  and  faithful,  so  persevering  and  constant  in  her  endeav- 
ours to  arrest  our  attention,  and  le  id  us  to  reflect  on  our  awful  condition, 
that  I  have  always  wondered  why  I  did  not  then  become  a  Christian, 
with  some  others  of  the  crew.  But  I  stifled  all  my  convictions,  and  put 
off  the  all-important  concerns  of  my  soul.  fSome  of  the  tracts  she  gave 
I  read,  others  I  threw  away ;  but  I  could  never  throw  away  or  get  rid 
of  her  faithful  admonitions.  They  have  always  followed  me.  l\\  the 
ocean  storm — amid  the  tierce  bowlings  of  the  tempest,  when  a  yawning 
eternity  was  at  my  feet,  her  sweet,  kind  voice  of  admonition  was  sound- 
ing on  my  ear,  wherever  I  went,  among  my  profane  associates  on  ship- 
board, or  in  the  haunts  of  vice  on  the  shore.  When  I  consider  how  she 
liad  left  for  ever  the  home  of  her  childhood,  and  her  dear  brother  and 
friends  behind,  forsaking  all  the  pleasant  associations  of  her  early  life,  to 
go  and  spend  her  days  among  an  ignorant  and  barbarous  people,  1  could 
not  withstand  such  arguments  against  my  scepticism.  There  must  cer- 
tainly be  a  reality  in  the  religion  of  Christ.  And.  then,  the  delightful  me- 
moir of  her.  prepared  by  her  husband,  I  have  read  it  many  times.  Oh,  it  is 
all  true!      She  ivas  a  Christian,  and  now  I  hope  to  meet  her  in  heaven.' 

"  During  the  few  last  days  of  his  life,  he  spoke  frequently,  with  tears 
of  gratitude,  of  Mrs.  Winslow,  and  enjoined  on  all  his  friends  to  obtain 
and  read  the  interesting  memoir  of  her  life.  He  died  in  the  triumph  of 
faith  in  a  glorious  Redeemer,  whom  he  had,  through  nearly  his  whole 
life,  slighted  and  despised. 

"  Dear  reader,  here  you  have  an  example  of  the  wide-spread  influence 
of  Christian  effort.  That  same  good  seed  which  was  sown  twenty-eight 
years  ago  on  board  a  ship  on  the  ocean,  we  find  springing  up  in  the 
centre  of  the  great  West." 


CHAPTER    VIII. 


*It  is  a  certain  fact,'  remarks  Foster,  'that  whenever  a 
man  prays  aright,  he  forgets  the  philosophy  of  it,  and  feels  as 
if  his  supplications  really  loould  make  a  difference  in  the  deter- 
minations and  conduct  of  the  Deity.  In  this  spirit  are  the 
prayers  recorded  in  the  Bible.'  Mrs.  Winslow,  whose  life 
was  baptized  in  devotion,  whose  soul  was  clad  with  prayer  as 
with  a  garment,  presents  a  striking  illustration  of  this  beautiful 
thought.  While  ever  deeply  conscious  of  the  solemnity  of 
prayer,  recognizing  it  to  be,  what  it  truly  is,  the  most  exalted 
exercise  of  the  soul,  the  most  elevated  state  of  thought  and 
feeling  of  which  the  mind  is  susceptible, — yet  none  engaged 
in  the  exercise  with  more  simple  views  or  with  a  more  child- 
like spirit  than  she.  Convinced  that  God  answered  prayer  in 
a  way  consonant  with  the  Divine  purpose,  and  worthy  of 
His  own  character,  she  yet  so  wrestled,  and  argued,  and  rea- 
soned with  Him,  as  if,  in  the  words  of  the  profound  thinker  we 
have  just  quoted,  her  'supplications  really  could  make  a  differ- 
ence in  the  determination  and  conduct  of  the  Deity.'  And  so 
must  we  approach  the  mercy-seat,  not  as  philosophers,  but  as 
Christians, — not  as  slaves,  but  as  children,  feeling  that  if  prayer 
cannot  move  God  to  us,  prayer  yet  can  move  the  lowly  sup- 
plicant towards  God.  The  'Thoughts'  we  are  about  to  glean 
from  her  private  record  and  her  letters,  will  give  us  a  deeper 
insight  into  the  interior  of  her  inner  life,  and  exhibit  her  views 
on  some  important  doctrinal  and  experimental  points  of  divine 
truth. 

ON    COMMUNION    WITH    GOD. 

"  How  little  is  this  understood  !  A  cold,  formal,  heartless 
prayer  often;  and  if  not  in  God's  own  children  altogether 
heartless,  yet  how  little  real  communion, — oh,  how  little!  No 
interchange  of  love,  no  confession  of  sin,  no  adoring  gratitude, 
no  emptying  of  the  burdened  heart  into  the  loving  heart  of 
God.  This  is  communion,  and  such  as  even  the  angels  them- 
selves behold  with  dehght,  while  they  can  but  imperfectly  un- 
[164] 


COMMUNION    WITH   GOD.  165 

derstand  tlie  happiness  known  only  to  the  saints  of  God.  How 
w^as  I  privileged  this  morning,  confessing  my  own  and  my 
children's  sins,  and  giving  myself  and  them  up  into  the  Lord's 
hand,  to  do  with  us  as  seemeth  Him  good." 

"  Taplow,  July  9th. — The  Lord  has  been  very  gracious  in 
suffering  me  to  draw  near  to  Him,  and  granting  me  much  of 
his  sensible  presence.  Dr.  Love,  in  his  '  Letters,'  describes 
my  experience  better  than  I  can  myself.  If  ever  my  heart 
truly  rejoices,  it  is  in  the  view  of  what  God  is,  as  seen  in 
Christ,  irrespective  of  my  personal  interest,  and  yet  not  losing 
sight  of  my  union  to  Christ.  Dr.  Love,  whose  attainments 
were  giant-like,  compared  with  my  poor  speck  of  knowledge, 
expresses  this  more  fully  ;  but  his  experience  is  mine.  On  the 
same  ladder  the  Lord  has  placed  my  foot,  though  he  is  higher 
up  by  many  rounds  than  I.  "When  the  character  of  God  is 
unfolded  in  Christ, — His  infinite  greatness,  overpowering  good- 
ness, and  glorious  perfections, — my  soul  is  filled  with  inex- 
pressible joy ;  I  feel  swallowed  up  in  their  vastness,  and  weep, 
without  being  able  to  say  why  I  w^eep.  Oh,  if  a  glimpse  now 
and  then  is  so  overpowering,  what  must  the  full  vision  of  that 
glory  be  ?  The  body  here  could  not  contain  it.  God  be 
praised  for  the  little  view,  and  for  the  full  revelation  that 
awaits  us  in  that  better,  brighter  world  above." 

"  12th. — Dr.  Love  remarks,  'How  sweet  is  the  bitterness  of 
that  repentance  which  is  truly  divine  and  gracious !  The  same 
light  which  opens  the  springs  of  godly  sorrow,  also  uncovers 
the  fountain  of  divine  joy.'  These  words  express  my  own  ex- 
perience, and  which  I  had  thought  w^as  peculiar  to  myself; 
and  have  therefore  seldom  advanced  it  to  others,  lest  I  should 
mislead  or  perplex  those  to  whom  I  wish  to  do  good.  Still  I 
think  dear  Dr.  Love  did  not  deal  sufficiently  with  the  manhood 
of  Christ.  He  seemed  to  look  too  little  to  God  in  Jesus.  What 
comfort  or  sympathy  can  a  poor  sinner  desire  from  looking  to 
an  infinitely  holy  God  out  of  Christ  ?  When  God  spoke  to 
men,  He  came  down  clothed  with  a  cloud ;  and  when  this 
same  God  speaks  to  us,  it  is  in  Jesus,  robed  in  the  cloud  of  our 
sinless  humanity.  Thus  revealing  Himself,  we  look  and  live. 
It  is  then  we  behold  Him  in  all  the  milder  rays  of  divine  light 
and  glory,  and  adore,  love,  and  bless  Him  who  says.  Fear  not, 
it  is  /." 


166  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 


TO    HER    SON    H- 


"  I  received  your  long  and  interesting  letter,  and  thank  you 
for  it.  .  .  .  When  you  enlisted  under  the  banner  of  King 
Jesus,  you  commenced  the  life  of  a  soldier,  and  are  therefore 
called,  as  a  good  soldier  of  Jesus  Christy  to  fight  manfully. 
Your  enemies  are  the  word,  Satan,  and  the  flesh ;  this  last  is 
the  greatest  of  all ;  it  lies  down  and  rises  up  with  you,  and 
wherever  you  are,  this  enemy  is  always  at  hand.  But  you  are 
exhorted  to  put  on  the  whole  armour  of  God,  and  to  stand ; 
and  by  faith  in  Christ  you  shall  conquer.  Keep  your  eye 
steadily  upon  Jesus.  Be  not  surprised  at  the  conflict  you 
wage ;  it  is  an  evidence  that  you  are  Christ's  true  disciple.  If 
you  were  not  a  possessor  of  spiritual  life,  you  would  have  noth- 
ing to  oppose  you  from  within.  Those  who  are  dead  in  sin 
know  nothing  of  this  warfare.  A  corpse  floats  down  with  the 
stream ;  but  where  there  is  living  faith  in  the  soul,  it  stems 
the  tide,  buffets  with  the  waves,  and  makes  its  way  through 
all  that  opposes  it.  Be  of  good  courage,  keep  close  to  Jesus, 
and  you  have  nothing  to  fear  from  within  or  without.  God, 
who  is  our  Sun  and  shield^  ivill  give  grace  and  glory;  and  no 
good  thing  ivill  He  luitliliold  from  them  that  walk  uprightly.  Be 
diligent  in  the  use  of  all  the  means  of  grace,  and  may  the  Lord 
abundantly  bless  your  soul,  and  provide  for  all  your  wants." 

To  the  same. — "  I  did  not  mean  to  write  to  you  this  time, 
but  you  are  so  good  yourself  in  writing  to  me,  that  I  could  not 
bear  to  pass  you  by.  .  .  .  It  is  a  mercy  to  be  kept  with 
our  eyes,  and  our  hearts  too,  up  to  the  dear  Saviour,  that  we 
may  be  ready  when  He  gives  the  summons.  This  world  is 
nothing  more  than  a  wretched,  dying  vanity.  But  the  bright 
world  to  which  we  are  travelling  has  substantial  blessing  and 
happiness  unutterable  to  bestow.  Oh,  then,  what  folly  to 
grieve  here,  and   suffer  our  affections  to  wander  from  God  ! 

I  am  glad  you  attend  Mr.  S 's.     The  prayer-meetings  will 

revive  your  fainting  soul.  I  do  not  recollect  what  first  led  me 
there,  but  it  was  the  Lord  who  directed  my  steps.  The  steins 
of  a  good  man  are  ordered  hy  the  Lord.  May  He  meet  with 
your  soul  and  bless  you.  Many  a  time  have  I  poured  out  my 
heart  for  you  in  that  sanctuary,  and  my  fervent  prayers  were 
offered  up  for  your  salvation.  Those  were  blessed  times.  I 
often  think  of  them  now.  May  Jesus  keep  our  soul  going  out 
after  Him.  I  had  rather  seek  Him  sorrowing  from  morning 
to  night,  than  not  to  seek  Him  at  all,  or  feel  cold  and  barren 
in  my  soul.     Kiss  the  little  ones  for  grandmamma." 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,  R.  F.  W.  167 


TO    HER    SON,    R.   F.  W 


" .  .  .  I  earnestly  hope  nothing  will  induce  you  to  re- 
linquish your  habits  of  temperance.  How  earnestly  and  con- 
stantly I  pray  that  God  may  keep  you  from  everything  that, 
by  slow  and  insidious  steps,  might  lead  to  certain  and,  perhaps, 
irremediable  ruin.  Anything  in  the  form  of  drink,  but  simple 
water, — I  mean,  of  course,  of  an  intoxicating  nature, — is  dan- 
gerous. I  have,  in  the  course  of  my  life  witnessed  such  sad, 
such  awful  effects  resulting  from  moderate  drinking,  that  my 
heart  sickens  at  the  very  remembrance  of  it.  Place  nothing 
to  your  lips  stronger  than  water.  No  one  but  God  can  know 
how  anxious  I  am  that  all  my  professing  children  may  be  kept 
walking  in  the  fear  of  God,  and  in  the  love  of  the  Spirit.  Re- 
member Him  who  loved  you  unto  death  ;  live  to  Him  and  for 
Him,  and  resolve  rather  to  die  than  do  aught  dishonouring  to 
His  dear  name,  who,  in  so  remarkable  a  manner,  called  you  out 
of  darkness  into  His  marvellous  light.  Dear  child,  bear  with 
a  fond  and  anxious  mother ;  for  you  know  not  how  my  heart 
goes  out  after  you.  The  Lord  has  wonderfully  kept  me  these 
twenty-eight  years  in  His  blessed  way,  and  has  never  per- 
mitted me  to  bring  dishonour  upon  His  dear  cause.  And 
yet  I  feel  that  I  as  much  require  His  upholding  hand,  and  His 
restraining  grace,  at  this  moment,  as  I  did  at  the  first.  Let 
him  that  thinketh  he  standeth  take  heed  lest  he  fall.  Jesus  is 
very  precious  to  my  soul.  I  feel  I  cannot  live  without  Him. 
He  is  my  all-in  all.  The  world,  and  all  its  glory  and  riches, 
is  as  dross  to  mc  in  comparison  of  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth. 
And  yet  I  find  the  Christian  life  to  be  one  of  constant  war- 
fare, and  feel,  at  times,  as  though  a  host  were  encamped  against 
me. 

"Again,  let  me  exhort  you  to  keep  close  to  Christ.  Make 
Him  your  Counsellor  and  your  Confidant;  Him  to  whom  you 
may  entrust  all  your  concerns,  and  into  whose  ear  you  may 
breathe  all  your  wants.  Keep  an  open  heart  with  Christ;  you 
need  no  other  friend.  Do  all  you  can  for  His  cause,  and  He 
will  take  care  of  you.  Walk  in  uprightness  before  Him,  in 
heart,  lip,  and  life.  Should  you  discover  failures,  go  at  once 
and  confess  them,  and  get  your  pardon  sealed  to  you  afresh  by 
the  Holy  Ghost.  Never  keep  a  sense  of  guilt  upon  the  con- 
science when  it  can  be  removed  at  once  by  the  blood  of  Christ. 
There  is  not  a  more  holy  exercise  in  the  Christian's  life  than 


168  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

the  confession  of  sin  to  God,  I  mean  by  this,  that  confessing 
sin  to  God  has  a  sanctifying  influence  on  the  heart,  maintains 
purity,  and  keeps  the  conscience  tender.  You  need  not  wait 
until  you  can  retire  and  fall  upon  your  knees;  you  can  do  it 
in  a  moment.  The  heart  lifted  up  in  silent  prayer  is  sufficient. 
/,  the  Lord,  search  the  heart.  I  have  no  greater  joy  than  to 
see  my  children  walking  in  the  truth.  Put  on  Christ,  walk  in 
Christ,  and  may  God  bless  you  and  make  you  a  blessing." 

The  subject  of  prophetic  truth,  doubtless  the  more  solemnly 
urged  upon  her  attention  by  the  remarkable  aspect  of  the 
times,  of  which  she  was  a  close  and  spiritual  observer,  began 
at  this  period  to  interest  and  occupy  her  thoughts.  The  doc- 
trine of  the  Lord's  second  coming, — the  signs  which  appeared 
to  herald,  and  the  events  which  probably  would  be  ushered  in 
by  his  glorious  advent, — seemed  to  be  the  great  truth  which 
particularly  arrested  her  attention.  AVe  gather  her  sentiments 
and  feelings  on  these  interesting  topics  of  inquiry,  from  her 
diary  and  correspondence  : — 

^' Awoke  this  morning  at  about  six  o'clock,  and  read  'Hugh 
White  on  the  Second  Advent/  and  was  led  to  lift  up  my  heart 
to  the  Lord  to  direct  my  mind  into  this  important  truth,  and 
enlighten  what  was  dark  in  me  on  the  subject.  In  the  course 
of  the  day,  felt  much  tried  at  my  want  of  spirituality,  my 
coldness  and  worldliness.  I  besought  the  Lord  to  revive  in 
my  soul  every  drooping  grace  of  the  Spirit,  to  save  me  from 
sad  declension,  quicken  me  afresh  by  the  power  of  the  Holy 
Ghost,  and  draw  me  nearer  and  yet  nearer  to  himself." 

"My  dear  0 Lord's  day,  Torrington-square. 

"Have  you  ever  read  the  Rev.  Hugh  White  on  the  Second 
Advent?  If  you  have  not,  obtain  it,  and  read  it.  I  am 
perusing  it  with  deep  interest,  and,  as  far  as  I  have  gone,  I 
can  enter  fully  into  his  views.  I  am  longing  to  have  my  eyes 
open  to  the  subject  more  than  they  were.  It  appears  to  me  a 
delightful  theme  for  close  and  prayerful  investigation.  Do 
give  it  your  attention.  May  the  Lord  unfold  His  own  truth 
to  your  soul  and  mine!  Mr.  Evans's  mind  is  also  opening  to 
this  truth.  Could  I  but  be  sure  that  He  would  indeed  soon 
come,  how  my  soul  would  rejoice;  but  of  this  I  cannot  so  far 
see  any  clear  evidence.  Oh,  for  more  weanedness  from  the 
world  !  Oh,  to  love  Jesus  more,  and  to  have  Him  more  in  our 
thoughts  !     How  soon  we  may   behold  Him  in  all  His  glory, 


THOUGHTS    OX   THE    COMING   OF    CHRIST.  169 

coming  in  the  clouds  of  heaven,  with  all  His  saints  and  holy- 
angels  !  May  the  Lord  keep  us  watching  and  waiting,  and 
looking  for  the  summons,  and  enable  us  to  say,  Come.,  Lord 
Jesus^  come  quickly  !  I  grieve  that  I  have  so  long  neglected 
to  search  into  this  glorious  subject;  but  I  am  only  now  just 
beginning  to  investigate  it,  with  much  prayer,  as  I  read  that 
the  Lord  would  lead  me  into  the  truth,  and  keep  me  from 
all  error  in  judgment.  But  as  it  opens  upon  me,  I  feel  my 
soul  led  out  in  grateful  praise  and  thanksgiving.  Do  get  the 
book  I  have  mentioned,  and  read  it  with  prayerful  attention." 
The  following  unfinished  letter,  addressed  to  her  pastor,  on 
the  subject  of  the  Lord's  Coming,  and  found  among  her  papers, 
it  is  believed  was  never  sent : — 

"My  dear  and  beloved  Brother, 

"  I  send  you  the  enclosed,  and  hope,  if  you  can  spare  the 
time,  you  will  give  it  a  perusal,  and  compare  it  with  the 
Word.  Truly  it  behoves  us,  as  much  as  it  did  Daniel,  to 
search  diligently  to  know  and  understand  the  signs  of  the 
times.  God  was  far  from  being  angry  with  Kis  servant  at 
that  time;  and  if  the  apostles  wrote  and  spake  so  much  of  the 
coming  of  the  Lord  in  their  days,  as  it  is  now  nearer  to  us 
than  it  was  to  them,  it  is  assuredly  of  the  greatest  consequence 
to  examine  for  ourselves.  Truly  I  can  say,  for  one,  Come., 
Lord  Jesus,  come  quickly!  I  trust  you  will  make  time  to  in- 
vestigate this  subject,  and  may  the  Lord  enlighten  all  our  minds. 
That  some  great  movement  is  going  on  in  the  kingdom  of 
Christ  on  earth,  is  as  evident  to  my  mind  as  that  I  live.  "We 
cannot  close  our  eyes  to  what  is  passing  all  around  us.  The 
wheels  of  God's  wonderful  providence  are  moving  onward, 
and  I  think  that  none  who  love  Him  but  must  be  prayerfully 
anxious  to  watch  the  way  He  is  taking  with  His  church.  My 
heart  is  at  times  overwhelmed  with  the  thought  of  His  near 
approach.  How  delightful  the  prospect  of  being  with  Jesus, 
our  dearest  and  best  friend  on  earth  and  in  heaven !  To  see 
Hira  whom  we  have  loved,  communed  with,  confided  In,  gone 
to  in  every  time  of  trouble,  and  found  Him  a  present  help ! 
And  then  to  meet  with  those  dear  to  our  hearts,  who  have  got 
there  before  us  to  welcome  us  home  !  I  long  to  see  Jesus;  He 
is  very,  very  precious  to  my  soul,  and  I  trust  He  is  to  yours." 

To  one  of  her  sons  in  America,  who  held  what  she  consid- 
ered extreme  views  of  the  Lord's  coming,  she  thus  faithfully 
writes : —  8 


170  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

" There  is  no  doubt  but  that  the  coming  of  the 

Lord  draws  nigh,  but  as  to  the  exact  time  no  man  knows,  nor 
can  know;  therefore  you  have  been  wrong  in  fixing  a  time, 
and  running  into  extravagance,  and  causing  the  infidel  to  boast 
and  tauntingly  to  ask.  Where  is  the  promise  of  His  coming  ? 
The  believer  is  so  to  live,  that  whether  he  goes  to  Christ,  or 
Christ  comes  to  him,  he  may  be  found  with  his  lamp  brightly 
burning,  ready  to  obey  the  summons.  While  you  have  fixed 
in  your  mind  that  you  shall  certainly  be  on  earth  at  the  com- 
ing of  the  Lord,  should  death  arrest  you,  you  might  in  one 
sense  be  totally  unprepared  for  the  event,  and  probably  disap- 
pointment and  anguish  would  fill  your  heart.  Such  has  been 
the  case  with  some,  who  as  fully  expected  the  Lord  as  you  do; 
and  yet  the  Lord  sent  for  them,  and  they  had  to  pass  through 
the  dark  valley  of  the  shadow  of  death,  that  they  might  swell 
His  train  when  He  really  did  come.  Two  members  of  our 
church  were  sadly  tried  w^hen  the  Lord  sent  for  them,  and  for 
some  time  their  minds  were  greatly  distressed,  and  they  met 
the  last  enemy  with  reluctance.  Now,  see  the  danger  of  fix- 
ing the  time  as  to  the  designs  of  God  towards  us.  I  long  for 
the  coming  of  Jesus,  and  would  leave  the  world ;  but  as  I 
know  not  the  day  nor  the  hour,  let  me  be  ready  to  meet  Him 
in  whatever  way  He  might  appoint.  It  is  not  for  you  to  know 
the  times  or  the  seasons  ivhich  the  Father  hath  put  in  His  own 
power^ 

It  has  been  remarked — and  the  reader  will  have  gathered 
from  these  pages  confirmation  of  its  truth — that  she  was  a  close 
and  intelligent  observer  of  the  characteristics  of  the  times  in 
which  she  lived.  Events  which  to  others  might  pass  as  trivial 
and  meaningless,  would,  to  her  deeply  spiritual  and  observing 
eye,  be  replete  with  interest  and  pregnant  with  significance. 
She  read  the  journals  of  the  day,  and  studied  the  movements 
of  the  age,  with  but  one  object, — the  development  of  God's 
purpose  in  the  progress  of  His  truth  and  kingdom  in  the  world. 
It  is  thus  she  records  her  sentiments  on  this  subject : — 

"  The-  Lord  God  will  sift  His  church,  and  throroughly  purge 
His  floor.  He  has  commanded  His  ministering  servants  to 
separate  the  precious  from  the  vile.  This  duty  they  have 
most  awfully  neglected,  but  now  He  is  about  to  do  it  Himself; 
and  what  He  does  will  be  loell  done.  Satan  is  endeavouring 
to  overturn,  but  God  holds  him  in  His  hand,  and  Avill  overrule 
all  his  wicked  designs,  for  the  welfare  of  His  church,  the  hor,- 


SIGNS   OF   THE    TIMES.  171 

our  of  His  truth,  and  the  glory  of  His  name.  So  shall  the 
precious  be  separated  from  the  vile,  and  the  world  be  driven 
out  of  His  church.  The  work  began  in  Scotland,  has  com- 
menced in  England,  and  will  go  on  until  the  whole  is  accom- 
plished. Then  comes  the  Bridegroom,  in  the  clouds  of  heav- 
en, to  meet  His  bride,  purified  by  fire  from  all  her  dross. 
The  time  is  drawing  nigh.  Everything  indicates  it.  How 
strange  that  any  who  profess  to  be  the  disciples  of  Christ, 
should  be  indijfferent  to  what  is  passing  before  their  eyes  at 
this  momentous  period !  Surely  the  wise  virgins  are  slumber- 
ing. Oh,  that  the  church  would  awake  and  rejoice  at  the 
glorious  prospect  that  is  before  her !  The  Lord  Jesus  is  on 
His  way.  Puseyism  is  the  forerunner  of  His  second  coming. 
It  is  preparing  the  way  of  the  Lord.  How  truly  can  God 
overrule  all  things  to  accomplish  his  own  purposes, — even 
Satan's  device,  to  work  His  will,  and  do  His  chosen  people 
good." 

"clouds  breaking." 

"The  Lord  is  about  to  do  a  great  Avork  in  the  nominally 
professing  church  of  Christ.  He  is  preparing  the  way  for  His 
second  advent.  Error,  in  the  shape  of  semi-popery,  is  spread- 
ing like  wildfire,  and  this  will  finally  consume  the  chaff,  and 
leave  the  pure  wheat  yet  more  pure.  Satan  thinks  differently  ; 
but  God  designs  much  good  to  His  church,  by  permitting  the 
abounding  of  this  error.  The  church  of  Christ  has  nothing  to 
do  (in  its  union)  with  this  world ;  but  Satan  has  contrived  to 
mix  up  the  world  with  the  church,  and  now  a  holy  and  jeal- 
ous God  has  put  His  own  hand  to  the  work,  and  a  complete 
and  final  separation  will  take  place.  I  have  long  seen  His 
blessed  hand  like  a  bright  light  rising  in  the  darkness  that  has 
obscured  the  glory  of  His  church.  To  me,  it  grew  more  dis- 
tinct as  the  darkness  grew  more  palpable ;  and  while  many, 
trembling  for  the  ark  of  God,  were  quaking  for  fear,  I  have 
been  enabled  to  keep  my  eye  upon  the  little  bright  cloud 
which  grew  brighter  to  my  view.  And  oh,  how  my  soul 
has  rejoiced !  for  I  could  discern  the  faithfulness  and  love 
of  my  God,  in  that  He  was  not  unmindful  of  his  promise, 
and  that  His  eye  was  upon,  and  His  heart  still  toward,  His 
church." 

It  was  probably  in  its  prophetic  light  that  she  was  led  to 
study  the  Lord's  parable  of  "the  pearl  of  great  price,"  and  to 


172  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

offer  an  interpretation  differing  entirely  from  the  one  generally 
received. 

"I  can  truly  say,"  she  writes  in  her  diary,  "0  Lord,  come 
quickly,  and  take  Thy  one  church — Thy  bride — to  the  home 
prepared  for  her.  This  is  the  '  pearl  of  great  price,'  the  church 
— not  Christ — hidden  in  the  field.  Jesus  comes  down,  parts 
with  the  last  drop  of  His  precious  blood  to  purchase  this 
'pearl,'  and  also  the  field — the  world — for  the  sake  of  the 
pearl  which  is  the  church.  The  world  is  now  kept  in  exist- 
ence for  the  sake  of  the  church  alone ;  and  when  the  church 
is  complete  and  brought  home,  the  world,  being  of  no  further 
use,  will  be  burnt  up  and  destroyed.  Now  the  matter  in  dis- 
pute stands  thus ;  either  the  church  purchases  Christ,  or  Christ 
purchases  the  church.  As  the  church  had  nothing  wherewith 
to  purchase  Christ,  then  Christ  must  have  purchased  the 
church  ;  and  such  was  the  magnitude  of  the  price,  that  none 
save  God's  own  Son  could  have  bought  it.  In  this  sense 
Christ  died  for  the  whole  world.  He  purchased  the  world  for 
the  sake  of  the  treasure  that  was  hid  in  the  world.  To  sum 
it  up  in  a  few  words, — 'the  pearl  of  great  price,'  and  the 
'treasure  hidden  in  the  field,'  are  identical — the  elect  church 
of  God.  Christ  parts  with  all  that  He  had,  even  life  itself,  to 
complete  the  purchase  ;  and  on  the  day  of  His  public  espousals 
with  His  church  He  will  wear  the  pearl  in  His  crown  of  re- 
joicing ;  and  the  world  in  which  it  was  hid,  and  from  whence 
it  was  taken,  will  then  be  consumed." 

As  sustaining  this  interpretation  of  the  parable,  she  was 
wont  to  quote  Toplady's  beautiful  and  familiar  fines : 

"  Deathless  Principle,  arise  ! 
Soar,  thoii  native  of  the  skies ! 
Pearl  of  price,  by  Jesus  bought, 
To  his  glorious  likeness  wrought  ; 
Go,  to  shine  before  his  throne, 
Deck  his  meditatorial  crown : 
Go,  liis  triumph  to  adorn  ; 
Made  for  God,  to  God  return." 

The  study  of  God's  general  providence  necessarily  implies 
attention  to  His  particular  providences.  The  eye  that  is  broad 
awake  to  scan  with  prayerful  interest  each  new  sign  in  the 
political  and  ecclesiastical  firmament,  eager  to  trace  some  indi- 
cation of  God's  unfolding  purposes  towards  his  church,  was 
not  likely  to  overlook  His  more  especial  dealings  in  individual 


GRATEFUL   RECOLLECTIONS.  173 

history.     We  find  her,  therefore,  thus  recording  what  she  en- 
titles 

"  god's  dealings  in  his  leadings." 
"The  text  last  evening  is  from  the  146th  Psalm,  8th  verse: 
The  Lord  raiseih  them  that  are  bowed  down.  It  was  excellent 
truth,  and  most  comforting  to  the  tried  believer.  How  little 
do  we  think  of  whose  care  we  are  under,  and  whose  loving 
eye  is  ever  guiding  our  way  through  the  wilderness,  causing  all 
things  we  meet  to  work  together  for  our  good !  Thus  has  He 
led  me.  He  has  brought  me  into  the  wilderness  to  teach  me, 
to  lead  me  to  cling  closer  to  Himself;  to  brighten  every  grace 
of  the  Spirit ;  to  wean  from  a  dying  world,  and  to  show  me 
this  was  not  my  rest,  because  it  Avas  polluted.  Here  He  gave 
me  precious  faith,  and  then  tried  the  faith  He  gave. 
When  bowed  down,  He  lifted  me  up.  He  shut  me  out  of  the 
vain  things  of  a  poor  empty  world,  and  shut  me  in  to  Himself, 
He  gave  me  my  work  to  do,  and  fitted  me  for  it.  Every  mo- 
ment was  occupied  in  doing  His  will.  Whatever  I  needed  I 
went  to  Him  for,  and  never  was  denied  one  good  thing.  He 
proved  himself  the  Husband  to  the  widow,  the  Father  to  the 
fatherless,  the  home  of  the  stranger.  His  name  to  me  has 
been  a  strong  tower,  into  w^iich  I  could  flee  and  be  safe.  His 
Spirit  came  upon  me  with  all  His  hfe-giving,  converting,  and 
reconverting  power;  filling  my  dwelling  with  the  richest 
blessings  of  heaven.  Oh,  what  returns  can  I  make  for  all  His 
abounding  goodness  to  me  ?  Shall  I  not  sing  the  loudest  in 
heaven  ?" 

"  grateful  recollections." 
"  Reading  a  New  York  religious  journal,  I  observed  an  ac- 
count of  the  erection  of  a  new  place  of  w^orship  in  Oliver 
street,  the  former  one  having  been  destroyed  by  fire.  This 
little  circumstance  recalled  to  my  mind  many  trying  yet  hal- 
lowed scenes  that  have  passed  away  for  ever,  yet  cannot  be 
forgotten.  It  was  in  that  sanctuary  I  sometimes  worshipped, 
the  pulpit  being  then  occupied  by  the  late  Rev.  John  Wil- 
liams. When  my  soul  has  been  oppressed  and  desolate,  find- 
ing comfort  nowhere  else,  I  have  repaired  thither,  and  have 
found  it.  Dear  Mr.  Williams  was  an  eminent  man  of  God, 
and  a  deeply  experienced  preacher  of  the  gospel.  The  precious 
truths,  as  they  fell  with  so  much  weight  from  his  lips,  were 


174  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

often  clothed  witli  a  remarkable  degree  of  the  unction  of  the 
Spirit.  And  altliough  I  have  gone  tliere  often  with  my  heart 
overwhelmed  within  me,  I  have  yet  been  enabled,  by  his  min- 
istrations, to  look  afresh  to  the  Rock  that  was  higher  than  I. 
Oh,  that  I  could  then  have  seen  how  blessedly  and  \visely  the 
Lord  was  training  me  and  mine  for  better  things  to  come  ; 
causing  me  to  pass  under  the  rod,  that  He  might  bring  me  into 
the  bond  of  the  covenant !" 

"the  true  source  of  spiritual  joy." 
"I  believe  that  our  joy  and  rejoicing  in  Christ  Jesus  de- 
pends upon  our  faith,  that  is,  our  believing  more  firmly  the 
matter-of-fact  truths  revealed  to  us  in  the  Bible.  Do  I  helieve 
that  Jesus  Christ  lived,  and  died,  and  rose  again  from  the 
grave,  and  is  now  alive  in  heaven,  and  is  there  for  us  ?  In 
proportion  as  we  are  thoroughly  persuaded  of  this,  we  can  and 
must  rejoice.  It  is  written.  In  ivhom  ye  also  trusted  ;  after  that 
ye  believed,  ye  loere  sealed  with  the  Holy  Sjnrit  ofpro7mse,  which 
is  the  earnest  of  our  inheritance.  Eph.  i.  13.  Therefore  it 
follows,  that  in  proportion  to  our  firm  belief  of  these  divine 
verities,  these  glorious  realities,  we  shall  not  only  rejoice,  but 
be  transformed  into  the  Divine  image.  Another  mistake  com- 
mon to  many  Christians,  is  the  habit  of  looking  for  ever 
within  for  some  evidence  of  their  adoption  ;  and  finding  noth- 
ing there  satisfactory,  they  do  not  and  cannot  rejoice.  Now, 
this  is  a  serious  defect.  It  is  not  by  looking  within  ourselves, 
but,  on  the  contrary,  it  is  by  looking  quite  out  of  ourselves, 
and  directing  the  eye  alone  to  Christ, — to  what  Christ  is,  and 
where  Christ  is, — that  can  alone  give  us  real  consolation ;  and 
in  proportion  to  our  faith  in  Him,  we  not  only  rejoice,  but  our 
evidences  brighten,  and  the  Spirit  within,  whose  office  it  is  to 
glorify  Christ,  bears  witness  w4th  our  spirit  that  we  are  born 
of  God.  The  life  of  God  in  the  soul  of  man  is  one  of  the 
most  glorious  works  of  God.  It  is  a  greater  work  than  that 
of  creation.  He  says.  Let  there  he  light,  and  in  a  moment 
there  is  in  the  soul  the  light  of  life.  The  sinner  looks  to  Jesus, 
believes,  and  is  saved.  He  lives  now  for  God  and  for  a  glori- 
ous  eternity.  Tlie  Holy  Ghost,  having  full  possession  of  the 
soul,  carries  on  the  great  work  of  sanctification.  He  has 
written  on  the  heart,  Holiness  unto  the  Lord ;  and  the  constant 
prayer  of  the  renewed  soul,  as  a  result,  wiU  be,  Lead  me  in 
the  way  of  up7'ightness.^' 


GODLY   SINCERITY.  175 

"  THE    CHRISTIAN    JOURNEY. 

"Life  is  a  journey,  often  a  short  one,  and  always  uncertain. 
But  there  is  another  journey.  The  behever  is  travelling 
through  a  waste  howling  wilderness,  to  another  and  a  glori- 
ous region,  where  ineffable  delight  and  happiness  await  us. 
The  road  is  narrow,  the  entrance'  strait,  so  strait  that 
thousands  miss  it  and  perish  in  the  wilderness ;  but  true  be- 
lievers, under  the  teaching  and  convoy  of  the  Holy  Ghost, 
find  it  and  walk  in  it.  The  King,  in  His  infinite  love  and 
compassion,  has  made  a  hedge  about  them,  separating  and  de- 
fending them  from  the  many  beasts  of  prey  that  lurk  around 
them ;  and  although  they  hear  their  bowlings  and  behold  their 
threatnings,  they  are  safe  from  their  power.  But  their  stron- 
gest foe  is  within  themselves, — a  heart  deceitful  above  all  things 
and  desperately  wicked.  From  this  there  is  no  escape  but  by 
constant  watchfulness,  and  earnest  cries  to  their  best  Friend 
and  Guide  for  protection.  And  were  it  not  for  this  faithful 
Guide,  how  often,  discouraged  by  reason  of  the  way,  would 
they  turn  back  !  But  He  watches  over  them  by  night  and  by 
day,  strengthens  them  when  weak,  upholds  them  when  falling, 
encourages  them  when  cast  downi,  defends  them  when  at- 
tacked, provides  for  them  when  in  need,  leads  them  by  living 
streams,  and  causes  them  there  to  lie  down  in  pleasant  pastures, 
and  on  sunny  banks.  And  as  they  advance  they  obtain  brighter 
views  of  the  good  land  they  are  nearing,  and  they  long  to  see 
the  King  in  His  beauty,  and  the  land  that  is  yet  very  far  off, 
and  to  meet  those  that  have  already  arrived  on  that  happy 
shore." 

"  GODLY    SINCERITY." 

"  Never  pay  a  compliment  at  the  expense  of  conscience  or 
of  truth.  Fear  God.  Never  say  what  you  do  not  really  feel. 
Confess  those  sins  of  heart  which  no  eye  sees  but  God's.  As- 
sume nothing  that  does  not  belong  to  you,  and  comes  not  from 
your  heart.  Beware  of  adopting  another  person's  experience 
as  your  own.  Let  the  fear  of  God  dwell  richly  in  you.  Let 
your  heart  be  right  with  Him.  Do  all  with  your  eye  upon 
eternity.  Think  little  of  time,  except  to  improve  every  mo- 
ment. Have  an  abiding  sense  of  the  Lord's  presence  with 
5'ou,  and  do  not  be  satisfied  without  it.  Never  suffer  your 
politeness  to  carry  you  beyond  truth.  Fear  God.  Let  truth 
dwell  in  your  heart,  and  nothing  but  truth  flow  from  your  lips. 


176  MEMOIR   OF   MES.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

Pray,  and  look  for  tlie  answer.  Aim  always  to  liave  the  con- 
sciousness of  God's  ear  harkening.  Be  not  satisfied  with  an 
empty,  lifeless  form,  nor  leave  the  throne  of  grace  without  a 
recognition.  Honour  the  Spirit,  and  the  Spirit  will  honour 
you.  Plead  for  His  indwelling  power.  Grieve  Him  not,  lest 
your  heart  grow  cold,  and  your  soul  become  barren.  Strive 
to  live  on  high,  and  you  will  live  holily ;  and  to  live  holily  is 
to  liv^e  happily." 

"  UNHOLY    JEALOUSY." 

'A  suspicious,  jealous  spirit  is  one  of  the  most  corroding 
evils  and  uncomfortable  states  of  mind  an  unhappy  individual 
can  be  tormented  with.  It  makes  its  subject,  and  all  others, 
miserable.  It  impairs  confidence,  weakens  friendship,  sepa- 
rates the  best  friends,  and  produces  incalculable  mischief  far 
and  wide.  It  was  jealousy  that  hurled  the  sinning  angels  from 
heaven.  It  w^as  jealousy  that  caused  the  fall  of  our  first  par- 
ents, and  drove  them  from  paradise.  It  was  jealousy  that 
led  to  the  first  murder.  It  was  jealousy  that  produced 
hatred  and  revenge  in  Esau  towards  Jacob.  It  is  marked 
in  God's  word  as  a  hateful,  God-dishonouring,  soul-de- 
stroying sin.  Let  us  beware  of  it,  watch  and  pray  against 
it,  and  the  moment  we  detect  its  workings  within  us,  crush  it 
at  once.  It  is  the  offspring  of  Satan,  and  the  destroyer  of 
mankind.  Let  us  also  beware  of  engendering  and  encourag- 
ing dislike  to  any  one  with  wdiom  we  associate.  This  evil  un- 
checked, tends  to  corrode  the  whole  inner  man,  sours  the 
temper,  and  causes  us  to  be  an  annoyance  to  every  one 
around  us.  The  instant  we  discover  the  hateful  feeling,  let 
us  go  at  once  to  Jesus,  lay  the  heart  open  before  Him,  unveil 
the  festering  wound  to  His  loving  eye,  and  He  will  heal,  and 
give  us  the  victory  over  ourselves." 

"the  unity  of  the  spirit." 
"The  Spirit  recognises  His  own  image  wherever  He  meets 
with  it.  If  I  have  the  Holy  Spirit  dwelling  in  me,  (and  if  I 
have  not  the  Spirit  of  Christ,  I  am  none  of  His,)  the  same 
Spirit  dwelling  in  another  will  acknowledge  it.  The  Spirit 
is  a  Spirit  of  love  as  well  as  of  holiness.  And  this  He  has 
made  the  test  of  our  sonship.  We  know  we  have  j^nssed  from 
death  unto  life,  because  ive  love  the  hrdhren.  Not  brethren 
only  of  the  church  at  Ephesus,  or  of  the  church  at  Rome, 
but  brethren  in  Christ  bavins:   his   own   blessed   imaeo   en- 


GROWTH    IN   GRACE.  177 

graren  on  the  renevred  soul.  "Whenever  we  feel  not  this 
spirit  of  union,  we  might  well  doubt  our  spiritual  life  and  our 
allegiance  to  the  Son  of  God.  If  I  meet  a  beggar  in  the  street, 
or  a  poor  woman  at  an  applestall,  or  one  of  the  great  of  the 
earth,  and  discern  in  that  individual  the  Spirit  of  Christ,  I  ask 
not  of  what  church  he  is,  or  to  what  communion  he  belongs ; 
my  heart  goes  out  in  love  to  him,  and  this  is  the  one  and  self- 
same Spirit  recognising  His  own  image  in  another.  How  is 
it  with  you?  Do  you  love  Christ's  image  wherever  and  in 
whomsoever  you  meet  it  ?  Do  you  speak  unkindly  or  think 
uncharitably  of  any  of  God's  redeemed  ones,  because  they  are 
not  of  your  sect  ?  Then  you  may  well  doubt  your  sincerity. 
The  love  of  the  Spirit — the  love  which  he  inspires  in  the  heart 
— is  an  unselfish  love,  a  holy  love,  a  uniting,  cementing  love, 
a  bond  of  union  to  the  one  family  of  God,  and  to  Christ  the 
one  Head.  Again  I  repeat  the  unfailing  test.  By  this  shall 
all  men  know  that  ye  are  my  disciples,  if  ye  have  love  one  to 
ano^erP 

"growth  in  grace." 
"There  is  such  a  state  as  growing  in  grace.  Not  that  I 
believe,  in  one  sense,  I  am  a  whit  better  now  than  I  ever  was ; 
for  in  my  flesh  there  dwelleth  no  good  thing.  The  flesh  is  the 
same  that  it  ever  was,  and  will  continue  the  same  until  laid  in 
the  grave.  But  is  there  not  such  a  thing  as  knowing  more  of 
God,  and  more  of  the  absolute  certainty  of  the  truth  of  the 
gospel?  Is  there  not  such  a  thing  as  knowing  more  of  Christ, 
His  excellence,  preciousness,  and  fulness,  through  the  teaching 
of  the  Holy  Spirit?  And  will  not  this  advancing  knowledge 
confirm  and  establish  our  souls,  strengthen  our  confidence,  pro- 
mote our  happiness,  and  lead  to  holiness  of  heart,  and  of  life  ? 
This  growth  in  divine  knowledge,  this  knowing  more  of  God 
in  Christ,  is  calculated  to  invigorate  the  new  man,  and  thus  to 
keep  in  subjection  the  evil  which  we  feel  is  ever  striving  for 
the  mastery.  This  is  growing  in  grace,  and  this  is  grace 
growing  in  us.  Then  let  us  not  grieve  the  Holy  Spirit,  this 
Divine  Indweller  of  our  hearts.  Also  to  know  more  of  our 
wretched,  lost  condition,  our  helplessness  and  unworthiness,  is 
growing  in  grace ;  for  this  view  of  our  state  will  cause  us  to 
value  that  precious  blood  that  can  alone  atone  for  our  sins, 
and  to  cleave  more  closely  to  Christ,  endearing  Him  to  the 
heart,  and  glorifving  Him  in  the  life." 
8* 


178  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

The  writings  of  the  Rev.  C.  G.  Finney,  an  American  Pres- 
byterian clergyman  of  much  and  deserved  celebrity,  are  ex- 
tensively and  favourably  known  in  this  country.  Some  of  his 
theological  views  were  not  considered  as  strictly  sound  ;  favour- 
ing, as  it  was  supposed,  the  notion  of  a  certain  degree  of  moral 
ability  in  the  sinner.  It  would  appear  from  the  following 
quotation,  found  in  Mrs.  Winslow's  journal,  that  his  views  on 
this  point  have  become  essentially  modified ;  thus  ranking  him 
more  decidedly  amongst  the  orthodox,  as  he  previously  was 
amongst  the  most  zealous  and  useful  divines  of  his  age.  It  is 
with  peculiar  satisfaction  we  transcribe  the  extract  for  the 
present  work: — 

"In  a  recent  publication  by  the  Rev.  Mr.  Finney,  I  met 
with  the  following  statement  from  his  pen: — 'I  have  thought 
that  (at  least  in  a  great  many  instances)  sufficient  stress  has 
not  been  laid  on  the  necessity  of  Divine  influence  on  the  hearts 
of  Christians  and  sinners.  I  am  confident  that  I  have  some- 
times erred  in  this  respect  myself  In  order  to  rouse  sinners 
and  backsliders  from  their  self-justifying  pleas  and  refuges,  I 
have  laid  (and  I  doubt  not  others  have  also  laid)  too  much 
stress  upon  the  natural  ahility  of  sinners,  to  the  neglect  of 
showing  the  nature  and  extent  of  their  dependence  upon  the 
grace  of  God  and  the  influence  of  His  Spirit.  This  has  grieved 
the  Spirit  of  God.  His  work  not  being  honoured  by  being 
made  sufficiently  prominent,  and  not  being  able  to  get  the 
glory  to  Himself  of  his  own  work.  He  has  withdrawn  or 
withheld  His  influence.'  How  much  it  is  to  be  regretted  that 
Mr.  Finney  did  not  make  this  discovery  earlier.  Much  mis- 
chief might  have  been  avoided,  and  much  more  substantial 
good  accomplished." 

ON  THE  CONDUCT  OF  A  MINISTER'S  WIFE. 

".  .  .  .  Every  time  I  bow  my  knees  before  God,  I  pray  for 
you  that  you  may  be  spared  to  your  dear  husband,  and  be  in- 
creasingly fitted  for  the  all-important  work  He  has  given  you 
to  do.  Oh,  how  important  the  care  of  precious  souls — souls 
that  are  destined  for  an  endless  eternity  I  A  minister's  wife  is, 
of  all  others,  placed  in  the  most  responsible  situation  in  the 
church  of  God.  Much  of  his  usefulness  depends  upon  her. 
She  must  be  a  helpmate  to  the  Lord's  servant,  and  a  servant 
of  the  Lord  herself.  His  mind  is  to  be  kept  free  from  the 
little  cares  and  annoyances  that  would  interrupt  and  distract 


PARENTAL    INDULGENCE.  179 

him  in  his  studies  ;  and,  above  all,  his  ears  closed  to  the  trifling 
gossip  of  those  who  talk  much,  but  do  little  for  the  cause  of  a 
precious  Saviour.  I  am  persuaded  that  Satan  is  ever  on  the 
watch  to  make  a  handle  of  evcrj^thing  to  impair  the  usefulness 
of  God's  ministers.  Be  humble,  prayerful,  and  watchful,  always 
feeling  yourself  as  much  called  to  aid  the  work  in  your  way 
as  he  is  in  his.  And  may  God  bless  you  both,  beloved  chil- 
dren." 

ON  PARENTAL  INDULGENCE. 

"  How  necessary  it  is  to  bring  up  children  in  the  nurture 
and  fear  of  the  Lord  !  Without  this,  even  in  a  worldly  point 
of  view,  they  and  others  are  often  miserable.  No  children 
are  so  happy  as  those  who  have  been  early  taught  implicit  and 
immediate  obedience  to  a  parent's  wishes,  or  will,  or  commands. 
"^V^ould  that  parents  more  universally  felt  that,  when  they 
suft'er  their  children  to  disobey  them,  they  are  absolutely  teach- 
ing them  to  sin  against  God  by  breaking  one  of  His  command- 
ments, and  one  to  which  the  promise  of  long  life  is  given. 
No  wonder  if  God,  in  just  displeasure,  remove  the  child  from 
such  tuition.  Remember  what  a  solemn  and  instructive  lesson 
the  Holy  Ghost  has  given  in  the  history  of  Eli.  There  is 
much  danger,  from  an  amiable  wish  to  gratify  a  child,  of 
counter-ordering  our  own  orders.  If  you  once  direct  a  child 
to  do  a  thing,  however  unpleasant  it  may  be  to  yourself  or 
the  child,  insist  in  firmness  upon  immediate  and  full  obedience. 
There  should  be  no  demur,  nor  delay.  Prompt  obedience  is 
as  lovely  in  a  child,  as  its  enforcement  is  dignified  in  a  parent. 
The  firm  and  gentle  constraint  of  parental  authority  commands 
respect,  and  even  inspires  reverence  and  love  in  the  child 
towards  the  parent.  Thus,  then,  if  you  desire  your  children 
sliould  grow  up,  cherishing  for  you  profound  esteem  and  affec- 
tion, insist  upon  this  filial  duty — the  duty  of  implicit  obedience 
— and  commence  early.  To  begin  right  is  the  way  to  end 
right." 

The  death  of  an  amiable  and  much-loved  daughter-in-law,  the 

wife  of  her  son  E ,  whom  she  had  fondled  as  an  infant, 

and  who,  in  later  life,  clave  to  her  w^th  an  affection  the  most 
tender  and  inseparable,  w^as  a  sore  bereavement.  She  was 
never  so  conscious  of  her  own  weakness  as  when  under  trial ; 
and  yet,  to  those  who  knew  her  best,  she  never,  in  reality, 
more  fully  exhibited  the  strong  marks  of  a  Christ-clinging, 


180  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

God-honouring  faith  as  then.  This  problem  will  be  of  easy 
solution  to  the  Christian,  It  was  at  the  moment  of  felt  weak- 
ness, that  Christ's  own  strength  was  jDerfectecl  in  her,  and  His 
grace  found  suificient  for  her  need.  A  letter  to  a  daughter-in- 
law  in  America  describes  her  state  of  mind  under  this  calamity. 

"  My  dear  J ,  Leamiugton,  March  19tli,  1844. 

"You  will  be  grieved  to  hear  that  the  Lord  has  seen 
fit  to  lay  His   heavy  hand  upon  us,  and   to  take   to  Himself, 

most  unexpectedly,  our  dear,  precious  S .     She  has  gone, 

leaving  us  all  to  mourn  her  loss,  which,  I  doubt  not,  is  her 
eternal  gain.  The  stroke  has  been  most  afflictive  to  every 
member  of  the  family,  but  to  none  more  so  than  myself.  She 
was  tenderly  and  deservedly  beloved  by  all,  and  we  shall  miss 
her  in  a  way  that  few  can  be  missed.  To  me  no  daughter 
could  have  been  more  devoted,  or  more  tenderly  and  sincerely 
affectionate.  During  intervals  of  her  illness,  her  mind  was 
taken  up  with  eternal  things,  and  her  thoughts  of  Jesus  were 
sweet.  The  Lord  had  been  for  some  time  preparing  her  for 
this  event — it  was  a  preparation  for  heaven,  for  glory,  and  for 
the  full  enjoyment  of  Himself.  During  the  most  irying  period 
of  anxiety  I  ever  passed  through,  the  Lord  mercifully  sup- 
ported me.  Prayer  was  offered  for  her  by  the  whole  church 
in  John-street,  I  may  say  morning,  noon,  and  night ;  and  also 
by  all  who  had  the  happiness  of  knowing  her,  who  could  pray. 
But  the  Lord  had  need  of  her,  and  He  took  her  from  the  evil 
to  come.  She  was  an  obedient  wife,  a  devoted  mother,  a  lov- 
ing sister,  and  a  most  affectionate  daughter  to  me.  I  never 
knew  what  it  was  to  have  a  care,  when  with  her.  She  always 
thought  of  me,  and  everything  she  imagined  would  contribute 
to  my  comfort,  she  did.  Always  cheerful,  and  never  out  of 
temper,  her  home  was  made  happy  for  all.  I  never  knew  a 
more  unselfish  person  in  my  life ;  her  whole  aim  and  study 
was  to  make  all  happy  around  her.  She  ever  considered  her 
husband's  interests  above  everything  else,  and  to  please  him 
was  the  first  thought  of  her  heart.  He  never  left  her,  but 
hung  over  her  until  the  last,  with  the  most  tender,  heart-rend- 
ing solicitude.  Dear,  precious  saint ;  she  has  escaped  from  a 
world  of  trial,  sin,  and  sorrow,  and  is  now  with  Him  she  loved. 

The  stroke  has  been  almost  too  much  for  dear  E 's  state  of 

health.  But  after  all,  there  is  one  Friend  from  whom  death 
cannot  separate  us.     In  imagination  I  have  followed  her  into 


LETTER    TO    A   FRIEND.  181 

the  presence  of  Jesus,  witnessed  her  adoring,  sinless  gratitude 
and  love ;  her  pure  spirit  recogniing  those  once  known  and 
dear  to  her,  around  the  throne  of  God.  My  thoughts  have 
been  much  in  heaven,  and  I  seem,  sometimes,  (so  real  has  it 

been,)  to  wish  to  be  there.     Dear  J ,  Hve  more  and  more 

for  eternity.  That  the  Lord  may  keep  you  and  me,  and  all 
we  love,  in  close  readiness  for  the  summons,  come  when  it  will, 
is  my  prayer." 

From  her  Diary. — "March    20th,    1844. — Dear   S 's 

death  has  brought  eternal  things  very  near  to  me.  Heaven 
seems  always  before  me,  and  in  imagination  I  am  constantly 
there.  I  long  to  be  gone.  I  much  enjo}*,  in  anticipation,  the 
blessedness  of  that  place  where  Jesus  is,  wjiere  He  unveils 
His  beauteous  face,  and  we  shall  behold  Him  without  a  cloud 
between.     My  sweetest  meditation,  lying  down  and  rising  up, 

or  waking  in  the  night,  is  heaven.     Dear  S 's  pure  spirit 

walking  in  white,  enjoying  the  unutterable  bliss  of  perfect  free- 
dom from  sin,  in  the  presence  of  Jesus,  her  dearest,  her  best 
friend,  is  before  me.  She  once  heard  of  Him  with  the  hearing 
of  the  ear,  but  now  lier  eyes  behold  Him.  I  can  scarcely 
realize  that  she  has  outstripped  me  in  the  race,  and  has  reached 
the  goal  before  me.  The  first  shall  he  last,  and  the  last  first. 
How  often  have  we  conversed  together  of  Him,  as  we  walked 
arm-in-arm  to  the  house  of  God.  Now  she  sees  Him — is  at 
His  side — adoring  gratitude  fills  her  soul,  and  boundless  love 
beams  in  every  look.  Dear  relations,  too,  meeting  to  part  no 
more  for  ever.  What  do  we  not  owe  a  good  and  gracious 
God  for  the  hope  of  immortality  beyond  tlie  dark  and  dreary 

grave!     Precious  S was  mercifully  preserved   from    all 

those  dismal  forebodings,  w^hich  the  thoughts  of  death  and 
the  grave  often  create  in  the  dying  believer.  Before  she  knew 
her  danger  she  was  there,  safely  housed  in  the  mansion  pre- 
pared for  her.  Thanks  he  unto  God  for  His  imsjxakahle  gift ! 
And  now,  my  dear  Lord,  my  soul  waits  and  longs  for  the  fruit 
springing  from  this  dispensation.  Oh,  let  it  not  pass  away 
without  a  rich  and  mighty  blessing.  It  may,  but  God  can 
speak,  if  not  in  affliction,  yet  in  prosperity.  The  work  is  His. 
When  He  begins,  none  can  hinder.  If  He  speaks  but  the 
word,  it  shall  be  done." 

TO    A    FEIEND. 

"  Dear  Sister  in  Jesus, —  ^pril  4th,  1844. 

"  Accept  my  thanks  for  your  little  volume ;  it  just  came 


182  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

at  a  moment  when  most  acceptable  and  most  needed.  My  be- 
loved daughter's  death  has  brought  lieaven  very  near  to  me. 
It  appears  but  a  step  and  I  am  there.  I  have  followed  her 
departed  spirit  into  the  presence  of  Him  whom  she  loved  ;  have 
beheld  her  wondering  delight,  adoring  gratitude,  and  over- 
whelming love,  w^hile  she  gazed  on  Him  whose  precious  blood 
redeemed  her  soul  from  all  sin  and  sorrow  for  ever.  I  have 
imagined  the  recognition  of  her  dear  relatives  who  had  gone 
before  her,  and  have  fancied  the  holy  joy  of  her  pure  spirit  in 
meeting  them  again.  Oh,  heaven  is  worth  living  for !  A  life 
of  trial  and  of  tribulation  is  as  nothing  when  compared  with 
the  mighty  blessings  that  await  the  believer  in  Jesus,  when  he 
drops  the  body  of  sin  and  of  death.  After  recovering,  in  some 
measure,  from  the  shock  of  her  sufferings  and  death,  my  mind 
turned  to  the  bright  scene  above,  and  there  my  soul  has  been 
more  or  less  regaled  ever  since.  I  have  been,  and  still  am, 
looking  to  the  things  that  are  not  seen,  and  that  are  eternal. 
It  seems  to  have  raised  me  some  feet  above  earth,  and  I  pray 
that  I  may  not  only  be  kept  there,  but  rise  higher  and  still 
higher.  Precious  Bible!  precious  revelation  of  God's  most 
gracious  doings  of  eternal  mercy  to  such  sinners  as  we  are ! 
Oh,  to  look  beyond  that  dark  and  dismal  grave,  and  remember 
the  word  that  says,  Absent  from  the  hody^  inesent  luith  the 
Lord!  My  soul  does  rejoice  at  this  moment  in  God  my  Sa- 
viour. Oh,  He  is  very,  very  precious — none  like  Him  on  earth 
or  in  heaven.  Much  as  I  anticipate  of  happiness  in  meeting 
dear,  very  dear  relatives  in  heaven,  it  would  be  no  heaven  to 
me  if  I  did  not  see  Jesus,  my  best,  ni}^  dearest,  my  constant 
friend,  w^ho,  wnth  unceasing  patience,  tenderness,  and  mercy, 
has  followed  me  through  all  my  wanderings  in  this  wilderness 
world,  and  has  never,  no,  never  left  nor  forsaken  me  for  one 
single  moment.  To  know  Him  aright,  is  a  little  heaven  begun 
below.  The  nearer  we  get  to  Jesus  here,  the  more  we  taste 
of  the  blessedness  that  awaits  us  above.  Never,  dear  friend, 
be  satisfied  with  what  you  know  of  Him  now.  Press  on  to 
know  more  and  more.  And  w^hat  a  humiliating  reflection  it  is, 
that  Vv-e  require  often  trial  upon  trial  to  rouse  us  from  our  slum- 
bers, not  only  to  our  duty,  but  to  our  sweetest,  highest  privi- 
leges !  Dearest  Jesus,  help  Thy  pilgrims  to  live  more  like 
pilgrims,  above  a  poor  dying  world,  and  more  in  full  view  of 
the  glory  that  awaits  them  wdien  they  shall  see  Thee  face  to 
face.    Dear  friend,  forgive  me ;  but  my  heart  is  full  of  this  one 


LETTER    TO    A    FRIEND.  183 

subject,  and  I  can  seldom  write,   speak,  or  think  of  anything 

else.     Precious  S 's  death  has  been  in  some  measure  new 

Hfe  to  my  soul.  I  thank  God  for  it ;  oh,  it  was  a  mercy  to  her 
and  a  mercy  to  me.  Jesus  does  all  things  well.  I  cease  now 
to  think  of  her  in  the  grave ;  I  see  her  with  the  eye  of  faith 
alone.  Let  us  aim  in  all  things  to  follow  Him  who,  despising 
this  world's  show,  left  us  an  example  how  we  should  walk. 
The  world  and  its  nothings  are  often  a  sad  snare  to  God's 
saints.  Oh,  that  by  faith  we  may  overcome  it  all,  and  keep 
close  to  Jesus.  Ye  are  not  of  the  tuorld,  even  as  I  am  not  of  the 
world.  Let  us  try  and  not  attend  to  its  gewgaws,  and  keep 
a  more  steadfast,  unwavering  eye  upon  Christ.  He  has  gone 
a  little  before  us,  and  stands  beckoning  us  to  follow.  One 
word  before  I  close.  Live  for  eternity.  Let  go  your  hold 
upon  the  world.  I  need  this  exhortation  myself,  as  much,  per- 
haps more,  than  you  do ;  but  receive  it  from  an  aged  pilgrim 
who,  as  she  nears  the  solemn  scenes  of  eternity,  and  more  real- 
izes the  inexpressible  joys  that  await,  and  the  welcome  that 
will  greet  us  there,  is  anxious  that  all  the  behevers  who  are 
travelling  the  same  road,  might  have  their  hearts  and  minds 
more  disentangled  from  earth  and  earthly  things,  and  them- 
selves unreservedly  given  to  Christ.  Have  your  lamp  trimmed 
and  brightly  burning,  for  every  day  and  every  hour  bring  us 
nearer  and  nearer  to  our  home." 

The  heart  must  be  right  with  God,  that  can  maintain  a 
fixed,  filial,  and  confidential  intercourse  with  the  Holy  One. 
As  the  proximity  of  the  compass  to  some  false  attraction  de- 
ranges its  movements,  and  perils  the  bark  it  steers ;  so  the 
Christian's  heart,  brought  too  near  some  creature  object,  or 
some  earthly  good,  flies  off  from  God,  and  thus  disturbs  the 
serenity,  and  retards  the  sanctity  of  the  soul.  But  how  envi- 
able the  conscious  nearness  to  God,  unveiled  in  the  following 
familiar  epistle  to  her  family  ! — 

"  I  could  not  forbear  telhng  you  how  graciously  God  is 
dealing  with  my  soul.  There  seems  no  distance  between  the 
Lord  and  your  unworthy  mother.  He  draws  nearer  and  still 
nearer  day  by  day.  I  cannot  describe,  for  language  fails  me, 
His  exceeding  gentleness,  His  tender.  His  almost  speaking  love 
to  my  soul.  How  condescending  is  He  in  all  His  dealings  and 
varying  dispensations  !  I  go  to  Him  often  in  perplexity,  not 
knowing  where  to  look ;  and  as  a  babe  is  hushed  to  quietness, 
soothed  and  comforted  on  its  mother's   bosom,  so  the  Lord 


184  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

cairns  and  quiets  me.  Even  down  to  old  age  I  ivill  carry  you^ 
is  His  promise  fulfilled  in  my  experience.  I  cannot  describe 
the  inconceivable  enjoyment,  mingled  with  much  sorrow  for 
sin,  I  have  had  for  these  many  weeks.  And  as  I  cannot  de- 
scriae,  so  I  must  leave  it,  praying  that  should  the  Lord  ever 
cause  you  to  feel  the  world,  and  all  that  you  have  loved,  in- 
sufficient to  impart  one  grain  of  real  happiness,  you  may  find 
in  Jesus  all,  and  more  than  tongue  can  express,  of  what  your 
soul  needs — an  everflowing,  overflowing  fountain  of  indescrib- 
able happiness  and  holy  enjoyment.  This  is  my  sweet  experi- 
ence. I  lie  at  His  feet  a  poor,  saved  sinner,  in  sure  and  cer- 
tain hope  of  eternal  life  already  begun — heaven  foreshadowed 
and  foretasted.  May  this  encourage  you,  in  a  time  of  deep 
need,  to  apply  for,  and  expect  similar  blessings.  Never,  never 
could  it  enter  into  the  heart  of  man  to  conceive  the  rich  gifts 
there  are  in  the  heart  of  Christ  for  His  saints.  But  He  has  re- 
vealed a  little  to  my  weary  spirit,  and  God  be  praised  for  His 
wondrous  condescension  and  grace,  so  richly  bestowed  upon 
the  chief  of  sinners. 

The  communion  of  the  Lord's  Supper  has  ever  been  regard- 
ed by  the  spiritual  Christian  as  an  occasion  of  especial  nearness 
to  Christ.  It  is  then  he  seems  to  be  brought  the  closest  to  the 
cross.  All  other  objects  vanish  from  his  view,  and,  like  the 
disciples  on  the  mount,  he  feels  himself  with  'Jesus  only,' 
This  was  pre-eminently  Mrs.  Winslow's  experience.  The 
occurrence  of  this  institution  was  always  a  season  of  broken- 
hearted and  endeared  communion  with  Jesus.  She  brought 
nothing  of  her  own  to  the  Lord's  table  but  her  emptiness. 
Lying  at  this  beautiful  gate  of  the  temple  in  all  her  helpless- 
ness and  need,  she  fastened  her  believing  eyes  but  upon  one 
object,  'expecting  to  receive  something  from  Him,'  or  'seeking 
to  catch  something  out  of  His  mouth.'  It  was  seldom  indeed, 
if  ever,  that  she  was  sent  empty  away.  Happy  for  the  church 
of  God  would  it  be  if  such  scriptural  and  simple  views  of  the 
nature  and  design  of  this  ordinance  more  generally  prevailed ! 
She  thus  describes  her  feelings  on  this  hallowed  occasion  : — 

"I  trust  the  Lord  was  with  us  last  evening,  at  His  own 
table  to  bless  us.  It  is  generally  to  me  a  feast  of  love,  and  of 
close  communion  with  Christ,  I  then  feel  I  am  more  at  lib- 
erty to  make  any  especial  request  at  the  hands  of  the  Lord. 
While  I  am  trying  in  my  poor  way  to  remember  Him,  is  it 
likely  that  He  will  not  at  that  moment  more  especially  remem- 


COMFORT   IX    AFFLICTION.  185 

ber  me,  the  child  who  is  looking  full  in  His  blessed  face,  for 
an  answer  to  her  request  ?  It  is  a  season  of  remembrance  on 
both  sides.  Jesus  and  His  redeemed  one  meet  together  in 
close  contact  and  sacred  fellowship.  It  is,  too,  a  season  of 
melting  love.  The  heart  is  softened ;  Christ  crucified  for  my 
sins  is  placed  before  the  eye ;  deep  repentance  aud  holy  affec- 
tion fill  the  soul." 

It  was  to  one  of  her  family  passing  through  a  season  of 
relative  and  painful  anxiety  that  she  penned  the  following 
letter  so  replete  with  comfort,  and  glowing  with  holy,  elevated 
feeling  : — 

'■''In  the  day  of  my  trouble  I  ivill  call  upon  Thee,  for  Thou 
wilt  ansiuer  me.  The  Lord  has  favoured  me  this  morning  with 
such  a  blessed  interview,  that  my  heart  is  full  of  His  goodness, 
and  expression  fails  me  quite.  He  is  the  same,  the  very  same 
that  He  ever  was ;  and  all  that  He  says  is  true,  blessedly  true. 
He  spake  to  Abraham,  to  Jacob,  and  to  Moses,  and  to  all  the 
prophets ;  and  He  speaks  to  you  and  to  me,  the  unworthiest 
of  all,  the  poorest  of  the  poor,  and  the  vilest  of  the  vile. 
Every  new  trial,  and  every  fresh  cross,  drive  me  into  the  very 
bosom  of  Jesus ;  and  it  seems  as  if  I  could  lie  there,  and  feel 
the  very  throbbings  of  His  loving  heart.  In  the  cup  of  trial 
we  are  called  to  drink,  there  is  no  wrath,  all  is  love,  though 
faith  may  be  tried,  and  we  may  for  a  season  weep.  Dearest 
child,  language  fails  me  to  tell  you  of  the  sweet  condescension 
of  my  God  and  your  God,  to  my  waiting,  wrestling  soul,  this 
morning.  I  could  do  little  but  weep,  and  my  tears  fall  even 
while  I  write.  Surely  Plis  name  is  love,  and  w^e  shall  see 
how  needful  this  trial  of  our  faith  was.  Whatever  draws  or 
drives  us  to  Christ  is  a  mighty  blessing.  Who  can  be  permit- 
ted to  have  intercourse  with  God,  and  not  find  it  a  blessing  ? 
Can  we  come  in  close  contact  with  Infinite  Goodness  and  not 
get  good  ?  Dear  child,  all  God  has  said  to  us  in  His  word  is 
true  ;  heaven  is  true,  and  we  are  very  near  it.  It  is  all  around 
us.  Jesus  is  there  before  us — ^there  to  welcome  us.  Oh,  to 
realize  it !  try  and  realize  it.  Every  dispensation  of  His  lov- 
ing providence  is  to  cause  us  to  realize  all  that  He  has  said. 
He  wants  us  to  be  more  and  more  like  Himself,  and  therefore 
we  should  be  more  anxious  to  derive  the  full  benefit  of  the 
affliction,  than  that  it  should  be  removed.  This  is  a  time  for 
wresthng  prayer  with  God,  our  own  God.  How  needful  are 
these  high  winds  and  storms  to  cause  us  to  cling  to  our  heav- 


186  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

enlj  Pilot,  and  to  speed  our  way  to  our  blessed  harbour  of 
eternal  rest.  May  this  season  of  trial  be  fraught  with  a  large 
blessing.     The  Lord,  I  trust,  after  He  has  tried  our  faith  and 

blessed  the  affliction,  will  restore  dear to  us  again.     He 

has  ordered  every  circumstance  attending  it.  Be  fully  per- 
suaded of  this.  Satan  often  endeavours  to  work  upon  the 
wretched  infidelity  of  our  nature,  by  leading  us  to  look  at 
second  causes.  The  Lord  has  done  it,  and  the  reason  He  will 
by-and-by  reveal  to  us.  Prayer  is  continually  offered  up  here 
on  her  and  your  behalf,  by  your  loving  people.  They  have 
proved  their  love  to  Jesus,  and  to  you  as  one  given  to  lead 
them  in  the  way  to  glory.  I  am  thankful  the  Lord  has  sent 
dear  Mr,  Evans  to  comfort  you  at  this  time.  May  He  make 
you  a  mutual  blessing.  Mr.  Franklin  is  to  preach.  The  post 
has  come.  The  Lord  be  praised  for  the  good  news.  May  He 
give  us  grateful  hearts  for  all  His  mercies  " 

"  I  received  yours,  and  was  glad  to  hear  of  your  safe  return 
home  ;  and  that  the  Lord  not  only  preserved  you  in  your  jour- 
ney, but  was  blessing  your  labours.  He  is  everything  to  us  ; 
without  Him  we  are  wretched,  and  with  Him  we  have  all  that 
can  be  desired.  What  would  heaven  be  without  Jesus  !  On 
Friday  evening  I  had  a  most  blessed  season.  The  Lord  drew 
sensibly  near,  filled  my  heart  with  love,  and  my  mouth  with 
arguments,  I  felt  I  loved  Him  better  than  the  dearest  object 
on  earth,  and  could  appeal  to  Him  for  the  truth,  who  alone 
could  search  the  heart.  It  was  a  season  of  mutual  love  and 
holy  confidence,  I  pleaded  for  my  children  and  for  my  chil- 
dren's children,  while  His  loving  eye  was  upon,  and  his  heart 
tow^ards  me,  I  wept  for  sin,  and  wept  for  joy,  God  caused 
all  His  goodness  to  pass  before  me,  and  this  it  is  that  breaks 
the  heart  of  a  poor  sinner.  It  was  one  of  those  special  seasons 
I  have  been  favoured  wnth  in  my  pilgrimage.  I  was  again 
favoured  at  family  worship  ;  to  my  own  soul  it  was  a  solemn, 
endearing  season,  while  I  prayed  for  the  conversion  of  the 
whole  household  and  all  that  were  dear  to  me.  The  enemy 
has  since  suggested  that  some  heavy  trial  was  near,  and  that 
this  was  sent  as  a  preparation.  Well,  I  am  His,  and  in  His 
own  loving  hands,  and  can  fully  trust  Him  for  all," 

TO    HER    SON    R,    F,    W . 


"I  was  glad  to  get  your  last,  and  am  anxious  to  encourage 
you  to  keep  up  the  correspondence  during  the  little  space  that 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,   R..    F.    W.  187 

is  now  allowed  your  mother  in  this  vale  of  tears.  It  is  a 
world  lying  in  the  wicked  one,  and  we  are  encompassed  about 
with  a  body  of  sin  and  of  death.  It  is  a  mercy  that  it  is  as 
well  with  us  as  it  is ;  and  above  all,  that  our  gracious  and 
long-suffering  Father  has  given  us  such  a  bright  and  good  hope 
of  a  better  one  to  come.  God  be  praised  that,  vile  as  I  am, 
that  hope  shines  brighter  and  brighter  as  I  draw  nearer  the 

end  of  my  race.     There  is  such  a  thing,  my  dear  R ,  as, 

in  a  measure,  living  with  God  even  here.  Take  Him  as  your 
dearest  and  best  Friend.  Treat  Him  as  one  to  whom  you  can 
fully  confide  your  all.  Never  be  afraid  of  opening  your  whole 
heart  to  Him,  however  hateful  you  may  feel  it.  Did  you  but 
more  know  the  depth  of  that  love  that  is  in  the  heart  of  Jesus, 
you  would  never  be  reluctant  to  go  to  Him  for  all  you  needed. 
It  is  to  know  the  character  of  God  as  your  Father  in  the  per- 
son of  Jesus  Christ,  that  can  alone  give  you  confidence  in 
Him.  Dear  child,  a  few  years  and  you  pass  away  to  millions 
and  millions  that  await  you.  Waste  not  the  little  space  allot- 
ted you  to  prepare  for  them.  I  pray  for  you;  you  will  never 
know  how  often  until  we  meet  above.  Oh,  that  I  might  have 
the  happiness  of  meeting  you  and  all  my  dear  children  in 
heaven  !  Is  it  not  worth  living  for  ?  Is  it  not  worth  dying 
for?  The  '  signs  of  the  times'  declare  that  the  coming  of  the 
Lord  draweth  nigh.  All  sanctified  hearts  seem  to  feel  this. 
I  seem  myself,  like  a  vessel  that  had  weathered  storm  after 
storm,  and  tempest  after  tempest,  and  at  last  was  brought 
within  sight  of  my  desired  haven,  but  have  not  yet  cast  anchor. 
But  oh,  the  land  is  in  sight,  and  it  looks  dehghtful  to  the  eye. 

Jesus  is  on  his  way.     Dear  H ,  who  was  always  looking 

for  Him,  will   come   with  Him Remember,  that  to 

walk  in  the  precept  is  the  way  to  the  full  enjoyment  of  the 
promise.  We  must  not  expect  the  comfort  of  the  one  without 
the  observance  of  the  other.  Rather  than  incur  debt,  exer- 
cise the  most  rigid  self-denial.  Go  not  against  God,  and  God 
will  be  for  you.  None  ever  disobey  Him,  but  are  sure  to  pay 
the  penalty  of  disobedience :  I  speak  now  of  His  own  chil- 
dren. The  wicked  are  turned  into  hell,  but  His  own  elect  are 
punished  here.  Some  men's  sins  go  before  to  judgment ;  some 
men's  sins  follow  after.  The  Christian  has  been  brought  to 
judgment  here,  and  acquitted.  There  is^  therefore^  now  no 
condemnation  to  them  that  are  in  Christ  Jesus.  And  again.  We 
are  chastened  of  the  Lord,  that  we  should  not  he  condemned  with 


188  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

the  loorld.  1  Cor.  xi.  32.  Nev^er  undertake  a  cause*  without 
kneeling  down  an'd  asking  tlic  Lord  for  wisdom  and  grace.  If 
Solomon  felt  it  needful  to  do  this,  well  may  you.  Christ  says, 
Without  me  ye  can  do  nothiurj.  Be  not  fearful  you  will  lose 
your  cause  by  so  doing  ;  but  only  trust  your  case  in  the  Lord's 
hands,  and  if  a  just  one,  He  will  prosper  you.  Walk  in  His 
fear,  and  you  need  fear  nothing  else.  The  account  of  your 
visit  to  Mount  Pleasant,  and  of  our  friends  there,  was  very 
interesting  to  me.  I  never  lose  sight  of  old  friends,  particu- 
larly those  whom  I  hope  to  meet  in  another  world." 

While  on  a  visit  to  her  son  E ,  at  Taplow,  Bucks,  she 

met  with  a  slight  accident,  the  consequences  of  which  might 
have  been  severe,  to  which  she  thus  gratefully  refers : — 

'■'■  Taplow. — Came  here  on  the  25th,  and  am  much  recruited 

in  strength.     Mr.  and  ]\Irs.  E called,  and  passed  an  hour. 

A  few  days  ago,  on  returning  from  visiting  a  sick  cottager,  and 
while  conversing  for  a  few  minutes  in  the  road  with  the  medi- 
cal man,  about  the  young  woman  I  had  just  left,  his  horse 
backed  the  chaise ;  and  before  either  of  us  could  get  out  of 
the  way,  he  was  forced  against  the  wall,  and  I  was  thrown 
down,  the  wheel  passing  over  my  foot.  I  fainted,  and  was 
carried  home ;  but  on  examination,  no  bones  were  found  to  be 
broken,  only  a  few  cuts  and  bruises  received,  and  so  the  Lord 
preserved  me  from  the  greater  evil.  Enough  of  this,  but  not 
enough  of  God's  tender  love  in  it  all.  Had  my  hip  been  dis- 
located, as  my  dear  mother's  was  by  a  much  less  accident,  I 
should  have  been  crippled  for  the  remainder  of  my  Hfe. 
What  you  said  of  God's  adopted  children  was  very  sweet  to 
me  to-day.  How  often  one  word — a  simple  sente-nce — when 
applied  by  the  Holy  Ghost,  gives  comfort,  and  lifts  one  up ! 
How  much  we  need  these  helps  all  through  our  weary  pil- 
grimage !  We  are  such  forgetful  creatures  ;  too  often  forget- 
ting what  we  are,  and  what  a  God  He  is." 

"I  have  often  thought  of  the  goodness,  kindness,  and  ten- 
der sympathy  of  God,  that  though  man  had  sinned  and  was 
at  enmity  with  his  Creator,  Benefactor,  and  Friend,  so  that 
the  ground  was  cursed  for  his  sake,  there  should  yet  be  so 
much  in  this  world  to  comfort,  to  alleviate,  and  delight;  so 
much  still  lingering  of  its  pristine  beauty  to  regale  and  please. 
And  if  this  world  is  still  so  attractive,  so  lovely  to  the  eye 

*  Her  son  to  whom  these  holy  admonitions  were  addressed  was  then 
practising  at  the  American  Bar. 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON    0 .  189 

and  pleasing  to  the  senses,  what  must  that  world  be  which  in- 
finite love  has  gone  to  prepare  for  the  redeemed  and  pure 
spirits  designed  to  inhabit  it !  " 

"  I  want  to  learn  to  live  by  the  day,  trusting  God  for  the 
daily  supplies  of  His  grace,  and  for  the  leadings  of  His  provi- 
dence ;  leaving  the  morrow  in  His  own  blessed  hand,  who 
knows  how  to  give,  and  when  to  withhold." 

From  her  Diary. — "  This  is  a  lovely  day.  Have  had  near- 
ness to  Jesus  in  prayer.  Felt  I  loved  Him  above  all  earthly 
love.  Could  recall  all  His  past  dealings,  watchful  provi- 
dences, unwearied  care,  from  infancy  to  the  present  moment. 
I  delight  to  trace  before  Him  His  wondrous  dealings  all  my 
journey  through.  Oh,  what  a  God  He  has  been  to  me !  and 
what  return?  often  the  basest.  How  often  these  thoughts 
bring  forth  tears  from  my  aged  eyes,  in  the  remembrance  of 
what  He  has  been  to  me,  and  what  I  have  been  to  Him.  I 
think  I  love  the  saints  above  better  than  the  saints  below. 
Their  pure  spirits  look  so  lovely  to  me.  Oh,  the  purity  of 
heaven !  what  attraction  has  it  to  one  conflicting  at  every 
step  with  an  unholy  nature !  Precious  Jesus,  help  and 
strengthen  Thy  unworthy  one  in  doing  what  is  right  in  Thy 
sight,     I  am  Thine,  and  thou  art  mine." 

TO    HER    SON    0 


"  I  have  just  been  trying  to  sing  to  your  tune,  my  dear  child, 
that  sweet  hymn  which  we  have  often  sung  together, — 

'There  is  a  fountain  fiU'd  with  blood, 
Drawn  from  Emmanuel's  veins.' 

Oh  that  you  and  1,  and  all  we  love,  may  be  washed  in  that 
blessed  Fountain.  May  we  live  more  to  the  honour  of  Him 
whose  precious  blood  it  is.  Oh,  for  more  grace,  more  love, 
more  engagedness  of  heart  in  His  blessed  service,  more  wean- 
edness  from  a  poor  dying,  disappointing  world,  which  at  best 
is  but  a  cheat,  promising  much,  but  performing  little.  The 
poor  King  of  the  French,  Louis-Philippe,  who,  a  few  weeks 
ago,  sat  proudly  upon  his  throne,  has  just  landed  in  England, 
seeking  an  asylum  in  the  political  storm.  When  the  steamer 
that  bore  him  and  his  family  approached  the  shore,  seeing  a 
number  of  people  assembled,  he  was  afraid  to  land,  thinking 
he  should  be  insulted.  In  vain  the  people  on  board  endeav- 
oured to  encourage  him ;  he  insisted  upon  the  vessel  stopping 


190  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY   WIXSLOW. 

until  an  individual  went  on  shore,  and  returned  with  the  assur- 
ance to  the  dethroned  monarch,  that  no  indignity  would  be 
offered  him.  He  then  ventured  to  land,  shook  hands  with 
several  individuals,  bowed  to  all  around  him,  and  stepped 
hastily  into  the  carriage  that  awaited  him,  expressino-  his  o-rati- 
tude  that  he  was  on  English  ground,  and  that  he  had  been  re- 
ceived with  feelings  of  courtesy  as  a  stranger  in  distress.  Oh, 
what  a  world  is  this !  What  a  mercy  that  we  have  a  Friend 
who  rules  over  all.  and  who  has  said,  /  change  noV' 


CHAPTER   IX, 


The  believer's  life  is  changeful  and  chequered.  The  path 
along  which  he  is  retracing  his  steps  back  to  paradise,  is  paved 
with  stones  of  variegated  hues.  And  yet,  painfully  diversi- 
fied as  are  often  the  events  in  his  history,  that  very  diversity 
is  as  essential  to  the  symmetry  and  completeness  of  his  Chris- 
tian character  as  are  different  shades  of  colouring  to  the  per- 
fection of  a  picture,  or  as  opposite  notes  in  music  are  to  the 
creation  of  harmony.  "  I  will  sing  of  mercy  and  of  judgment ; 
unto  Thee,  O  Lord,  will  I  sing."  Mrs.  Winslow  was  called 
to  record  two  events  in  her  domestic  history,  singularly  illus- 
trative of  this  thought,  in  which  two  characteristic  features  of 
her  Christianity  were  beautifully  exhibited — her  unwavering 
faith  in  suffering,  and  her  grateful  spirit  in  joy. 

The  first  event  to  which  we  refer  was  the  death  of  her  son 

H .      His    conversion  has  been   alluded   to.      From  the 

time  that  he  became  a  subject  of  Divine  grace,  during  the 
revival  already  narrated,  he  was  to  her,  in  the  highest  sense, 
'a  dear  son,'  a  'pleasant  child,'  'tenderly  loved  of  his  mother.' 
They  took  sweet  counsel  together,  and  walked  to  the  house  of 
God  in  company.  It  was  often  his  privilege  to  speak  a  word 
of  heart-cheer  when  her  soul  was  depressed,  and,  by  his  filial 
affection  and  sympathy,  to  fling  many  a  warm  sunbeam  upon 
her  lone  and  shady  path.  He  was  in  all  respects  worthy  of 
the  grief  she  thus  touchingly  records  in  her  Diary  of  his 
decease : — 

"  April  2nd. — The  Lord  has  again  laid  His  chasening  hand 
upon  me,  but  in  love.  Dear  Henry  is  gone  home,  and  I  am 
a  bereaved  mother.  He  sleeps  in  Jesus,  that  is  my  only  com- 
fort ;  and  oh,  what  a  comfort  it  is !  Oh,  to  be  with  Jesus, — 
that  is  happiness.  It  is  happiness  to  walk  with  Him  here, 
but  what  happiness  to  see  Him  as  He  is,  and  to  behold  His 
glory.  And  now,  dear,  precious  Henry,  thou  art  beholding 
[1911 


192  MEMOIR    OP    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

Him  in  all  His  glory,  whom  thou  didst  long  to  r^ee  coming  in 
that  glory  in  the  clouds  of  heaven.  How  highly  favoured 
thou  hast  been !  Oh  for  faith  to  see  this,  to  me,  painful  dis- 
pensation in  its  true  light.  Let  not  your  heart  he  troubled  ;  ye 
believe  in  God,  believe  also  ^V^  me.  Lord,  I  believe  ;  help  thou  my 
unbelief.    Oh,  to  believe  that  Jesus  is  indeed  at  the  right  hand 

of  God  !     If  He  is  there,  H is  there  too,  and  I  shall  meet 

him  again.  On  the  resurrection  of  Christ  depends  our  eternal 
all.  Upon  that  single  and  glorious  truth  hinges  every  other. 
If  that  be  true,  all  that  He  has  said,  all  that  He  has  promised, 
and   all  that  He  has   engaged  to  do,  is  true.     Lord,  increase 

my  faith,  and  sanctify  this  trial  to  us  all.     Dear received 

the   mournful   intelligence,    and  immediately  left  home,    and 

came  to  me,  to  comfort  me  under  my  trouble.     Dear  H 

was  taken  to  his  happy  rest  on  Saturday  morning,  and  spent 
a  happy  Sabbath  with  the  Lord  of  the  Sabbath.  He  was 
fully  prepared  for  the  change,  and  was  more  fitted  for  heaven 
than  for  earth.  The  world  seemed  to  have  no  charms  for  him. 
It  had  lost  its  hold  for  a  long  period.  He  w^as  livmg  in  full 
expectation  of  Christ's  coming,  and  now  he  is  with  Him  whom 
he  so  ardently  longed  to  see.  Day  and  night  he  was  looking 
for  Him,  as  if  hastening  unto  the  corning  of  the  Lord  ;  so  that 
Christ  was  in  all  his  thoughts.  Ought  I  not  to  rejoice  that  he 
has  realized  his  wish,  though  not  in  the  way  he  anticipated  ? 
When  he  had  to  grapple  with  the  'last  enemy,'  he  feared  not 
death ;  and,  to  use  his  own  w^ords,  '  longed  to  clap  his  glad 
wings  and  fly  to  Jesus.'  May  God,  in  His  tender  mercy,  be 
the  Father  to  the  fatherless,  and  the  widow's  God." 

"  5th. — I  love  to  contemplate  him  there,  to  think  of  the 
welcome  he  has  received,  first  from  Jesus,  and  then  from  the 
dear  ones  who  had  gone  a  little  before  him.  All  is  now  per- 
fect knowledge,  perfect  purity,  perfect  love.  If  communion 
with  departed  spirits  is  attainable,  I  have  realized  something 
of  it.  I  have  felt  such  a  nearness  to  him,  and  such  soothing 
from  knowing  that  he  was  quite  safe  and  happy  with  Christ. 
How  sweet,  how  comforting  is  the  thought  that  I  shall  see  him 
sooner  than  if  he  had  continued  on  earth.  Heaven  is  nearer 
to  me  than  New  York.*  This  affliction  has  wafted  me  closer 
to  my  happy  home.     Oh  to  realize  it  fully  even  /zere." 

*  "  Do  you  think  your  daughter  lost,  when  she  is  but  sleeping  in  the 
bosom  of  the  Almio-hty  ?  Think  her  not  absent  who  is  in  such  a  Friend's 
house.     Is  she  lost  to  you,  who  is  found  to  Christ  ?     He  is  an  ill  debtor 


DEATH   OP   HER   SOX   H.  193 

A  few  extracts  from  one  or  two  letters  penned  at  this  time 
of  her  affliction  will  still  further  evidence  the  submissive, 
heaven-breathing  spirit  with  which  she  bowed  to  this  chasten- 
ing of  love.  She  thus  addresses  the  bereaved  widow  of  her 
son : — 

"  What  can  I  say  to  comfort  you,  my  dear  J ,  in  this 

heavy  trial,  while  I  feel  heartbroken  myself?  I  trust  ere  this 
the  true  Comforter  has  enabled  you  to  cast  your  heavy  burden 
upon  Him,  who  has  promised  to  be  a  Father  to  the  fatherless, 
and  the  widow's  God,  The  shock  that  I  have  received  has 
brought  me  a  little  nearer  to  my  home ;  and  my  great  comfort 
is  that  I  shall  see  my  dear  child  much  sooner  than  if  he  had 
remained  where  he  was.  Heaven  seems  nearer  to  me  than 
New  York,  and  dear  Henry  nearer  too.  It  seems  but  a  step 
and  I  am  there,  where  there  is  no  more  sin,  nor  death,  and 
where  all  tears  are  for  ever  wiped  away.  This  is  a  vale  of 
tears.  I  have  been  a  child  of  sorrow,  and  yet  not  one  trial  too 
many  have  I  had.  Dear  Henry  was  more  fit  for  heaven  than 
for  earth.  The  Lord  has  been  weaning  him  from  things  below 
for  some  time,  preparing  him  for  a  better  home  above.  He 
was  looking  for  Jesus,  and  longing  to  see  Him,  and  the  Lord 
has  given  him  his  wish  in  His  own  way  and  time.  We  must 
not  look  at  second  causes.  Every  circumstance  connected 
with  God's  children,  living  or  dying,  is  ordered  by  Himself. 
He  has  not  gone  a  moment  sooner  or  a  moment  later  than  God 
had  appointed.  Chosen  in  Christ  before  the  world  was,  so 
were  all  things  connected  with  him  here  wisely  and  mercifully 
ordered.  Oh,  I  love  to  think  of  him  with  Jesus,  mingling 
with  the  pure  spirits  above,  and  long  to  join  them.  ...  Go 
to  Jesus  for  all  you  need.  Take  Him  as  your  true,  your  best, 
your  only  Friend.  There  is  not  another  like  Him.  Take  Him 
as  your  brother  born  for  adversity.  The  oftener  you  go  to 
Him,  the  more  welcome  you  will  be,  and  the  better  acquainted. 
You  were  His  child  before,  but  now  you  are  His  widowed 
child,  and  have  a  double  claim  upon  Him.  Put  in  your  claim. 
Do  not  first  go  to  an  arm  of  flesh,  and  then  to  Christ.  But 
go  to  Christ  first,  before  you  make  up  your  mind  as  to  the 
course  you  should  take.  Ami  to  bring  up  your  children  for 
eternity.  May  the  Lord  bless,  comfort,  and  guide  you,  is  my 
constant  prayer." 

who  payetli  that  which  he  boiroweth  with  a  grudge.  Prepare  yourself; 
you  are  nearer  your  daughter  this  day  than  yesterday.  It  is  self-love 
in  u?  that  maketh  Ui=  mourn  for  them  that  die  in  the  Lord." — Rritherford. 


194  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 


TO  MRS.  C . 

"  I  have  not  written  to  you  for  some  time,  although  my 
thouo-hts  have  wandered  to  you.  I  have  been  in  trouble.  The 
Lord  has  laid  His  loving  hand  again  upon  me.  I  know  it  is 
in  love  to  my  soul,  and  not  one  unkind  feehng  has  lurked  in 
mj  heart  towards  Him.  He  has  taken  home  to  His  own 
bosom  one  of  my  dear  and  justly  loved  sons  ;  my  dear  Henry 
is  with  Jesus.  He  has  sweetly  housed  my  child,  leaving  me 
one  the  less  on  earth,  and  one  more  to  welcome  me  to  glory. 
Dear  friend,  in  spite  of  all  I  know  of  His  goodness,  my  poor 
heart  has  deeply  felt  this  stroke,  and  the  shock  to  my  nerves 
has  brought  me  a  httle  nearer  to  the  grave ;  but  the  support 
and  consolation  I  have  experienced  under  it,  have  amply  re- 
paid me  for  all  I  have  suffered.  Oh  the  goodness  of  God 
towards  unworthy  me !  What  can  I  render  unto  Him  for  all 
His  loving-kindness  and  tender  mercies  towards  me  and  my 
departed  one  ?  I  have  not  the  shadow  of  a  doubt  of  his  hap- 
piness at  this  moment.  There  was  not  one  in  my  family,  not 
myself  excepted,  who  was  so  thoroughly  prepared  for  this 
great  change  as  he.  He  was  brought  to  the  feet  of  Jesus  at 
nineteen,  and  since  then  has  held  on  his  way,  carrying  out  the 
principles  of  the  gospel  in  his  life  and  conversation.  He  had 
much  of  the  Spirit  of  Christ,  manifested  in  all  kindness  and 
benevolence,  even,  as  some  thought,  to  a  feult.  For  the  last 
two  years  he  has  been  looking  for  the  coming  of  Christ,  and 
imagined,  with  many  others,  that  the  time  was  near.  So  did 
the  Lord  prepare  him  for  his  inheritance.  Dear  as  he  was,  I 
would  not  recall  him  for  a  thousand  worlds.  If  there  is  such 
a  thing  as  connnunion  with  departed  spirits,  I  think  I  have  felt 
something  of  its  sweetness.  Oh  the  comfort,  the  rich  consola- 
tion and  blessing,  this  trying  dispensation  has  afforded  me !  It 
has  enabled  me  to  realize  the  unseen  realities  of  the  eternal 
world.  ...  I  long  to  hear  how  your  soul  prospers.  You  are 
the  Lord's,  His  portion  for  ever ;  and  He  is  training  you  and 
me  for  our  happy  inheritance.  Oh,  let  us  try  and  live  up  to  it. 
What  are  the  various  sorrows  of  the  way,  compared  with  the 
glory  that  shall  be  revealed  in  us  ?  May  the  Lord  lead  us  into 
an  experimental  knowledge  of  Jesus.  No  other  is  worth  hav- 
ing, living  or  dying.  As  I  draw  near  the  confines  of  eternity, 
how  poor  and  contemptible  is  everything  that  has  not  Christ 
in  it, — Christ  first,  Christ  last,  and  Christ  all  through.  Jesus 
must  be  all  in  all,  or  He  is  nothing.     Oh,  to  be  ready,  quite 


195 

ready,  to  obey  the  welcome  summons,  to  believe  all  that  God 
has  promised  us  in  His  word,  and  to  live  more  under  the  sancti- 
fying influence  of  the  Holy  Spirit  within  us.  We  must  honour 
the  Spirit  more  than  we  do,  and  He  will  honour  us,  by  reveal- 
ing more  of  Christ  to  us,  and  in  us  the  hope  of  glory.  .  .  ." 

From  her  diary. — "  Received  a  letter  from  J ,  announc- 
ing the  death  of  her  mother,  six  weeks  after  my  dear  H . 

This  is  a  severe  stroke  to  her.  May  it  lead  her  closer  to  Jesus. 
She  would,  perhaps,  have  leaned  more  upon  her  mother  than 
upon  Christ,  and  so  He  removed  this  prop  too.  He  will  have 
His  people  lean  upon  Him  alone.  I  hope  she  was  ready  for 
the  change.  Oh,  to  be  quite  ready !  O  Lord,  keep  me  mind- 
ful of  my  latter  end.  Prepare  me  for  that  great  change. 
Confirm  me  in  the  truth  of  Thy  precious  resurrection;  and 
when  the  time  comes,  take  away  all  fear  of  death  and  the 
grave,  and  let  me  see  Thy  face.  Thy  welcome  face,  all  through 
that  dark  valley,  and  give  me  an  abundant  entrance  into  Thy 
kingdom  of  glory  above.  Absent  from  the  body,  I  shall  be 
present  with  the  Lord.  To  be  with  Thee,  will  be  heaven. 
Come,  Lord  Jesus,  come  quickly." 

The  second  event  to  which  we  refer  (although  not  occurring 
at  the  same  time)  was  well  calculated  to  illustrate  another  fea- 
ture of  her  religion — her  praiseful  spirit  in  joy.  The  conver- 
sion of  her  daughter  to  Christ,  was  in  answer  to  the  wrest- 
lings which  had  broken  the  stillness  of  many  a  midnight  hour, 
and  was  the  precious  fruit  of  a  faith  that  had  long  and  patient- 
ly travailed.  Ever  on  the  alert  to  win  a  soul  to  the  Saviour, 
the  decision  of  one  for  Him,  so  near  and  so  justly  beloved, 
would  enkindle  in  her  heart  a  joy  such  as  none  but  a  mother, 
a  Christian  mother,  and  such  a  Christian  mother,  could  feel. 
Her  private  journal  thus  records  this  pleasing  occurence  : — 

"April  30th. — About  two  months  ago,  the  Lord  most  gra- 
ciously answered  my  prayers,  in   bringing  my  dearest  E 

to  sit  at  the  feet  of  Jesus.  She  is  now  a  child  of  God,  par- 
doned, justified,  and  adopted  into  His  family,  and  walking  in 
that  narrow,  blessed  way  that  leads  to  life  eternal.  God  be 
praised  for  His  marvellous  goodness  to  her  and  to  me.  Oh, 
he  is,  in  very  deed,  a  God  hearing  and  answering  prayer.  I 
receive  it  as  a  precious  earnest  of  greater  things  to  come.  0 
dearest  Lord,  I  cannot  rest  until  all  are  called,  and  all  call 
Thee  blessed.  A  dear  company  of  believers  meet  several 
times  in  the  week,  unitedly  to  pray  and  wrestle  for  the  out- 


196  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

pouring  of  the  Holy  Spirit.  This  is  what  I  have  long  been 
urging  upon  the  minds  of  the  pastor  and  the  people,  and  now 
it  has  commenced.  0  Lord,  hear !  0  Lord,  pardon  our  luke- 
warmness,  and  come  with  all  Thy  glorious  train,  and  take  a 
full  possession  of  every  heart,  and  bring  rebellious  sinners  to 
relinquish  their  enmity,  and  bow  to  Thy  rightful  sceptre.  Let 
Thy  kingdom  come,  and  Thy  will  be  done  on  earth,  even  as 
it  is  done  in  heaven.     Amen  and  amen." 

"May  10th. — Still  feeble  in  body,  but  oh,  how  thankful  at 
times  !  My  heart  overflows  with  love  to  Him  who  is  to  me 
an  ocean  of  love.  Eternity,  eternity  will  only  be  sufficient  for 
my  song  of  praise  and  thanksgiving.  Dear  E 's  conver- 
sion has  lifted  me  nearer  to  God.  Jesus  lives,  still  lives  to  an- 
swer prayer,  and  give  life  to  the  dead." 

"i/O,  God  hath  given  thee  all  that  sail  n-ith  thee."— Acta  xxvii;  24. 

"Father!  who  o'er  time's  boisterous  tide 

A  precious  bark  art  steering  ; 
Mother  !  who  anxious  at  his  side 

Each  distant  storm  art  hearing  ; 
Bind  ye  the  promise  to  your  heart, 

Thus  by  the  angel  spoken  ; 
Believe  ye  that  your  circle  blest 

Shall  gain  the  port  unbroken. 

*'  "When  stranded  on  the  rock  of  woe, 

Life's  last  faint  watch-light  burnetii, 
And  shuddermg  toward  that  bourn  to  go 

From  whence  no  guest  returueth, — 
Then  may  each  bark  yowr  love  has  launch'd. 

Gliding  with  sail  unriven, 
Send  forth  a  seraph  soul  to  form 

Your  family  in  heaven." 

"God,  in  the  riches  of  His  grace,  grant  that  it  may  be  so 
with  my  own  dear  ones ;  and  I  believe  it  will,  for  God  has 
said  to  me,  I  will  he  a  Father  to  thy  fatherless  children.  For 
Jesus'  sake,  hear  my  prayer,  0  Lord,  my  God." 

TO    ONE    OF    HER    SONS. 

"  My  mind,  body,  and  whole  heart,  are  engaged  in  the 
blessed  work  of  the  Lord,  which  is  now  going  on.     Precious 

E 's  conversion  is  a  pledge  to  me  of  greater  blessings  to 

come.  God  is  a  great  God,  and  He  loveth  to  do  great  things 
like  Himself;  and  I  come  not  in  my  own  most  worthless  name, 


THE   BLESSING    OF    EARLY   DLSCIPLINE.  197 

but  in  the  name  of  a  great  Saviour,  in  whom  He  is  well  pleased, 
and  who  has  said,  Ask  anything  in  my  name,  and  I  will  do  it. 
Here  is  encouragement  for  a  poor  w^orm  of  the  dust,  to  come 
with  large  demands  upon  the  rojal  bounty  of  the  King  of 
kings  and  Lord  of  lords.  We  have  constant  meeting  for 
prayer  for  the  outpouring  of  the  Holy  Spirit.  The  hearts  of 
God's  people  are  stirred  up  to  wrestle  for  the  blessing,  and  be 

assured  we  shall  receive  it.     E 's  conversion  has  awakened 

many  to  inquiry,  and  has  done  much  good.  She  is  indeed  a 
new  creature.  Glory  to  God  in  the  highest,  for  this  mighty 
blessing. 

"  Last  evening  dear  Mr,  Evans  met  his  Bible  class,  both 
male  and  female,  in  the  body  of  the  chapel.  It  was  full,  and 
solemn  as  eternity.  E returned  w4th  her  mind  much  en- 
gaged, and  rejoicing  in  the  prospect  of  the  blessings  that 
would  follow  such  a  solemn  and  deeply  interesting  service." 

It  often  seems  good  to  Him  who  is  "  excellent  in  council 
and  wonderful  in  working,"  to  bring  early  to  the  proof  the 
grace  He  early  gives.  Painful  and  mysterious  as  this  may 
appear  at  the  time,  it  is  yet  in  after  years  that  the  reason,  as 
the  results,  of  such  a  procedure,  is  more  apparent.  "When 
the  duties  of  life  increase,  and  with  them,  life's  trials — when  a 
matured  Christian  experience,  a  strongly-developed  character, 
and  a  mellowed  judgment,  are  demanded, — it  is  theniho,  Chris- 
tian reaps  the  golden  harvest  of  his  early  training,  and  traces 
the  infinite  wisdom  and  love  which  in  the  first  and  gentlest 
evolvings  of  his  faith  marked  for  him  a  path  of  early  suffering. 
Thus  immense  and  far-reaching  are  the  blessings  which  flow 
from  sanctified  sorrov*-.  The  illness  of  her  daughter,  while 
yet  in  the  glow  of  her  new-born  joy,  elicited  from  Mrs.  Wins- 
low's  pen  some  of  the  most  affecting  expressions  of  her  quick 
and  tender  sympathy.  The  following  choice  extracts,  com- 
posed at  this  and  at  other  periods,  are  culled  from  her 

letters  to  her  daughter. 

"Dearest  E , 

"  I  have  just  been  praying  for  you,  and  oh,  that  a 
good  and  gracious  God  might  condescend  to  send  down  an- 
swers of  peace  to  the  petitions  offered  in  the  name  of  Jesus, 
His  own  well-beloved  Son.  I  cannot  hear  until  to-morrow 
what  Dr.  Jephson  says,  and  wishes  you  to  do  ;  so  I  must  con- 
tinue to  look  up.     Oh  for  more  precious  faith ;  I  feel  I  need 


198  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

it.  May  you  enjoy  much  of  the  presence  of  Him  who  can 
make  a  sick  room  a  Bethel  to  your  soul.  All  places  where 
He  is,  are  a  heaven  below.  That  presence  can  make  every 
cup  of  affliction  sweet.  May  God  give  all  needful  judgment 
to  Dr.  J.,  and  incline  you  strictly  to  adhere  to  his  advice.  I 
have  prayed  continually  that  wisdom  might  be  imparted  to 
him.  Now  that  you  are  in  his  hands,  my  mind  is  compara- 
tively composed." 

"  I  have  been  desponding  about  you  this  morning,  precious 
child.  Oh  that  God,  my  God  and  your  God,  may  answer  my 
prayers  in  His  rich  mercy !  I  know  that  He  always  hears 
them.  I  believe  that  there  is  not  a  single  petition  put  up  by 
a  child  of  His,  however  faintly  expressed  that  petition  may 
be,  but  He  hears  it.  The  smallest  degree  of  faith  will  send  it 
not  only  into  the  ear,  but  into  the  heart  of  God.  The  Spirit 
indites  it,  and  Christ,  the  believer's  surety  and  advocate,  pre- 
sents it,  sprinkled  with  His  own  precious  blood,  to  the  Father. 
How  can  a  poor  believer  ever  fiiil,  in  his  lowest  state,  of  hav- 
ing the  perfections  of  God — His  power,  love,  and  faithfulness 
— encircling  him  moment  by  moment?  His  tender  heart  now 
enters  into  all  your  weakness  and  pain,  and  all  is  sent  in  love 
to  your  precious  soul,  more  precious  in  the  sight  of  God  than 
ten  thousand  worlds." 

"  The  Lord  stretch  forth  His  healing  hand,  and  restore  you 
to  health  and  strength ;  and  may  He  cause  your  soul,  above 
all,  to  prosper  and  be  in  health.  Surely  our  times  are  in  His 
hands^  who  loves  us  better  than  w^e  love  ourselves.  Oh,  to 
trust  Him  wholly !  He  careth  for  us.  How  much  easier  at 
times  it  seems  to  trust  Him  w^ith  our  eternal  all,  than  with  the 
inferior  concerns  of  a  few  short  and  uncertain  years.     I  have 

just  been  reading  the  Journal  of  Sir  A 's  Scripture  Reader. 

Sir  A 's  remarks  on  the  iniquity  of  removing  such  men 

from  a  sphere  of  usefulness,  on  the  plea  that  they  interfere  Avith 
clerical  duties,  are  excellent.  .  .  You  are  in  your  Father's 
hands,  and  besides,  Jesus  was  the  healer  of  bodily  disease, 
when  on  earth,  as  well  as  spiritual.  Is  He  less  so  now  ?  By 
no  means.  Have  faith  in  this  Physician ;  He  is  able,  and  as 
willing  as  He  is  able,  to  do  us  all  possible  good.  Simple,  child- 
like faith,  a  constant  coming  and  looking  to  Jesus,  will  do  won- 
ders. Have  not  I  called  upon  him  in  trouble,  times  without 
number,  and  has  He  ever  denied  me  ?  Never,  no  never  in  any 
one  instance.     Oh  to  know  the  character  of  God !     When  He 


LETTERS   TO   HER   DAUGHTER.  199 

imparts  a  glimpse  even  of  Himself,  it  seems  as  if  the  heart 
could  not  contain  Avhat  it  feels.  To  behold  Him  in  Jesus, 
sheds  a  holy  mildness,  gentleness,  and  lustre  over  all  His  great 
and  glorious  attributes.  I  am  at  a  loss  at  times  for  language 
to  express  what  I  feel." 

"  I  often  think,  how  could  I  live  without  a  throne  of  grace  ! 
It  is  a  sure  refuge,  a  resting-place  to  my  soul,  endeared  by  a 
thousand  most  tender,  soul-humbling,  soul-refreshing  interviews 
■with  the  God  of  heaven, — the  God  of  love  to  me  and  mine. 
How  sweet  to  draw  near  to  Him,  and  hear  the  whispers  of  the 
still,  small  voice  of  the  Spirit,  reproving,  counselling,  and  sooth- 
ing the  too  often  turbulent  and  excited  feelings  of  the  soul ! 
My  dear  child,  you  need  never  mourn  that  you  are  fatherless, 
since  God,  the  eternal  God,  is  your  own  Father,  better  than 
ten  thousand  earthly  parents.  Oh,  trust  Him  fully  ;  open  your 
wliole  heart  to  Him ;  tell  Him  all  you  wish,  all  you  feel,  all 
you  fear.  Keep  nothing  back.  He  will  remove  all  that  is 
wrong,  set  everything  right,  and  keep  you  quietly  resting  in 
the  embrace  of  His  matchless  love.  It  is  a  heaven  below,  to 
be  I  assive  in  His  hands,  and  know  no  \vill  but  His,  believing 
tliat  His  is  best." 

"  Taplow. — I  could  sing  of  the  praises  of  the  Lord  by  day 
and  by  night.  He  is  the  joy  of  my  heart ;  yea.  He  is  my  life. 
So  may  He  ever  be  to  you.  Cling  to  Him,  nor  let  Him  go. 
If  He  hides  himself  behind  a  cloud,  it  is  only  to  make  you  more 
earnest  in  seeking  Him.  Go  again  and  again,  until  you  find 
Him.  Think  of  a  poor  sinful  mortal  holding  converse  with 
God,  the  mighty  God,  the  everlasting  Father !  But  so  it  is. 
Be  not  satisfied  with  a  commonplace  Christianity.  How^  many 
there  are  who  have  no  certainty  as  to  their  union  with  Christ, 
are  satisfied  with  a  lifeless  form,  and  go  no  further.  Ah,  what 
losers  they  are  !  No  tongue  can  tell  the  blessedness,  when 
the  believer  can  testify  at  times  that  he  is  with  God,  and  that 

God  is  with  him.     Give  my  love  to  dear  Lady  L ,  and  to 

dear  C .     I  feel  much  love  to  that  dear  child.     May  the 

Lord  draw  her  nearer  and  nearer  to  Himself.  He  has  given 
her  one  who  fears  Him,  which  is  a  sweet  token  to  her  of  the 
love  He  has  towards  her.  Let  us  watch  the  gracious  hand  of 
our  God  in  all  His  eventful  providences.  How  circumspect 
should  we  be,  yet  not  w^alking  in  bondage,  but  as  dear  children, 
watched  over  and  directed  by  a  tender,  loving  Father,  whose 
aim  is  to  make  us  hap2:)y  here,  and  eternally  happy  hereafter," 


200        MEMOIR  OF  MRS.  MARY  WINSLOW. 

"Yesterday  we  were  at  Windsor  Castle.  It  was  a  solemn 
sermon  to  my  soul.  Where  are  all  those  kings  and  queens, 
and  other  great  ones,  whose  pictures  and  monuments  cover 
these  walls  ?  Where  are  they  now  ?  They  have  passed  away, 
and  all  the  pomp  and  shov*^  that  surrounded  them  liere  has 
vanished  with  them.  Oh,  how  trifiing  does  everything  appear 
but  tlie  one  thing  needful !  We,  too,  are  passing  away  ;  and 
vrhat  a  mercy  if  enabled  to  say,  'I  am  going  to  my  Father's 
home  above,  my  happy  home,  prepared  by  Him  who  laid 
down  His  life  for  me.'  " 

"  May  the  Lord  in  mercy  keep  us  in  liealth,  best  of  all,  in 
soul-prosperity ;  for  I  have  had  to  learn  that  the  wealth  and 
honours  of  this  poor,  dying  world  cannot  compensate  for  the 
loss  of  the  sweet  and  precious  life-giving  influence  of  the  Holy 
Spirit  within.  My  soul  has  of  late  been  much  tried,  so  that  it 
has  been  a  trial  to  me  to  open  my  mouth  in  prayer ;  and  often, 
when  I  did,  a  cloud  would  pass  that  obscured  every  ray  of 
divine  light.  My  soul  seemed  like  a  bark  at  sea,  without  a 
helm  to  steer  or  a  pilot  to  guide  it.  And  yet  the  Lord  has 
not  been  quite  out  of  sight  in  private  prayer.  Like  Mary,  I 
have  been  ready  to  say,  Jliey  have  taken  away  my  Lord.,  and  I 
hnow  not  ivhere  they  have  laid  Him.  And  yet,  like  her,  I  have 
stood  weeping  and  sorrowing  after  Him.  This  may  be  owing 
to  a  pressure  on  the  nerves  and  an  over-tried  mind ;  but  this  I 
know,  when  I  turn  within  to  search  for  the  cause,  I  see  so 
much  reason  that  God  should  thus  chasten  me,  that  I  only 
wonder  He  should  ever  cast  a  look  of  mercy  towards  me. 
Unprofitable,  unprofitable  servant  I  feel  I  have  been  all  my 
life,  and  am  compelled  to  lay  my  mouth  in  the  dust  before 
Him.  Such  have  been  my  feelings  of  late,  and  yet,  though 
cast  down,  I  am  not  in  despair,  blessed  be  God.  When  he 
has  tried  me,  I  shall  come  forth  as  gold,  I  trust,  and  shall  yet 
praise  Him  who  is  the  health  of  mv  countenance  and  my 
God." 

It  was  during  this  domestic  trial — the  illness  of  her  daughter 
— that  she  received  the  following  characteristic  letter  from  her 
Pastor,  the  Rev.  J.  H.  Evans,  touchingly  expressive  of  the 
sacred  sympathy  peculiar  to  the  beloved  writer. 

"John  Street,  July  G. 
"  My  beloved  Friend  and  dearly-esteemed  Sister  in 
Jesus,  our  sympathizing  Head, — 

"How  much  did  I  wish  to  see  von  vo.-lerdav  before  vou 


LETTER   FROM   REV.  J.  H.  EVANS.  201 

left  for  Leamington,  but  it  was  out  of  my  power.  "We  can  do 
but  little — nothing.  Jesus  has  all,  is  all,  can  do  all,  and  will 
put  all  forth  in  our  necessities,  be  they  ever_so  deep.  You 
shall  find  him  everything  in  this  your  need  of  all  things — a 
very  present  help.  We  could  never  know  His  heart  but  for 
our  troubles,  never  know  His  grace  but  for  our  worthlessness. 
There  is  a  tenderness  in  the  love  of  the  Saviour  which  our 
miseries,  I  will  not  say  draw  out,  but  exhibit.  In  no  other 
school  could  we  learn  it.  Be  not  afraid,  dear  and  precious  sis- 
ter, of  the  form  in  which  His  loving  hand  has  placed  you ;  He 
will  come  and  sit  by  you,  and  should  it  be  painful  to  the  flesh 
and  the  spirit  too.  He  can  smooth  it.     One  smile  of  his  can 

dry  up  all  your  tears.     Your  dear  and  precious  E is  more 

near  to  Him  than  she  is  to  you,  dearly  as  you  love  her.  Oh ! 
leave  her  in  His  hands.  He  has  a  right  to  her.  And  wheth- 
er He  lend  her  to  you  for  a  little  longer  or  not,  yet  He  will 
have  you  trust  her  with  Him.  His  is  a  tender  bosom,  and 
tenderly  has  He  borne  up  your  weary  head  in  many  a  weary- 
ing day,  and  sleepless  night.  He  said  that  He  would,  and  He 
has  done  it  according  to  His  word,  and  He  will  yet  do  it,  be- 
cause He  has  said  that  He  will. 

"I  was  lately  told  of  a  dear  brother  who  said  that  when  he 
first  thought  of  losing  his  only  daughter — and  he  had  but  one 
other  child — he  felt  that  he  could  not  part  with  her  ;  but  when 
he  followed  her  body  into  the  churchyard  it  seemed  as  if  he 
was  going  to  her  wedding.  This  was  the  husband  of  Lady  L. 
S.  What  cannot  grace  do  ?  Dear  and  precious  sister,  may 
the  all-sufficient  God  and  precious  Saviour  be  your  sufficient 
help  in  your  deep  trial.     He  alone  can.     My  best  love  to  dear 

0 and  his  wife.     Thank  her  for  her  kind  letter.     My 

tender  love  to  dear  E.,  when  she  can  bear  to  be  told  of  it." 

FROM    HER    JOURNAL. 

"Brighton,  Feb.  6. 
"  Came  here  a  week  ago.  ...  I  have  just  had  some  sweet 
interviews  Avith  a  young  Christian  for  whom  the  Lord  has 
done  great  things.  Surrounded  by  v/orldly  connexions  and 
worldly  prosperity,  yet  brought  to  sit  at  the  feet  of  Jesus,  and 
blessedly  taught  by  the  Spirit,  I  was  interested  to  find  so  young 
a  creature  in  so  short  a  time  (only  two  years)  with  such  a 
deep  experience  of  spiritual  things.  The  Lord  has  laid  ill 
health  at  her  door,  so  that  she  has  her  cross  to  carry,  but  it 


Or 


202  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

has  been  most  graciously  sanctified  to  her  soul's  best  interests. 
.  .  .  The  Lord  be  praised  for  all  His  tender  mercies  and 
loving-kindnesses — unceasmg  and  unwearying  as  His  love. 
My  continual  shortcomings,  and  oftcoming  for  forgiveness  again 
and  again,  does  not  exhaust  Him.  I  should  have  wearied  out 
the  whole  host  of  heaven  before  this  ;  but  Jesus  is  never  wea- 
ried with  hearing  the  cries  of  His  poor  tried  and  tempted 
saints.  Always  are  they  welcome,  and  I  think  the  oftener  I 
go,  the  more  welcome  I  am.  Not  a  frown  upon  that  counte- 
nance towards  one  wdio  really  feels  his  need  of  Him.  A  smil- 
ing welcome,  fraught  with  mighty  blessings,  which,  while  it 
gladdens  the  heart,  fills  the  soul  with  a  humlDling  sense  of  its 
own  vileness, — humbled  in  self,  exalted  in  Christ." 

"  I  want  to  live  more  on  high, — more  above  the  world  and 
all  its  little  things.  Oh,  for  wisdom  to  enable  me  to  discharge 
all  relative  duties  without  being  cumbered  ;  to  live  in  heavenly 
places  in  Christ  Jesus.  The  Lord  has  strengthened  me  to 
maintain  family  worship ;  the  people  of  the  house  regularly 
attending,  and  gratified  in  being  permitted  to  come.  The  Lord 
helps  me  to  speak  a  word  now  and  then  in  His  name,  and  gives 
me  liberty  in  prayer ;  and  yet  I  feel  quite  unequal  in  body  and 
mind.  I  feel  it  a  cross,  but  dare  not  withdraw.  May  the 
Lord  forgive  all  my  mistakes,  my  reluctance  to  do  what  I  felt 
it  was  my  duty  to  do.  But  oh,  how  good  and  how  kind  He  has 
been  to  me  !  What  a  God,  no  one  can  know  or  tell  but  my- 
self. It  almost  breaks  my  heart  when  I  think  of  the  w^ondrous 
love  He  bears  towards  one  so  utterly  worthless.  I  am  wea- 
ried to  find  I  do  not  get  on,  except  in  knowing  more  of  my 
wretchedness  and  vileness,  and  more  of  the  sufficiency  of 
Jesus,  and  the  absolute  necessity  of  going  to  Him  for  every- 
thing I  need,  and  living  upon  Him  moment  by  moment.  But 
this  is  to  be  learnt  out  by  means  of  much  ploughing  of  the 
Holy  Ghost  upon  the  renewed  heart,  and  this  through  the 
providence  of  God.  God's  providence  acts  as  the  handmaid 
to  faith  ;  and  there  is  not  a  truth  in  God's  word  but  what  must 
be  learnt  out  in  the  same  way  and  by  the  same  process.  Oh, 
to  be  a  real  Christian !  This  is  no  easy  matter.  How  many 
trials  and  crosses,  ups  and  downs,  are  needful  to  fit  us  for  the 
mansion  Jesus  has  gone  to  prepare  for  us !  And  as  soon  as 
our  education  is  complete.  He  takes  us  home  to  the  full  enjoy- 
ment of  our  inheritance  above.  Blessed  be  God  for  the  hope 
He  has  given  us  in  the  gospel  of  His  d(\ir  Son." 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,  0 .  203 

"  13tli. — A  stormy  day — the  sea  in  a  foam.  Heard  a  ser- 
mon on  tlie  llesstdness  of  the  man  unto  whom  God  imjmted 
rigldcousntss  icithout  loorks.  The  great  conflict  in  my  soul 
when  I  first  sought  the  Lord  was,  how  I  was  to  be  saved 
without  works,  for  I  had  no  works  to  come  with.  How  bless- 
edly did  Jesus  manifest  Himself  to  me  that  night,  and  say  to 
me,  '  I  am  thy  salvation  without  thy  works ; ' — a  night  to  be 
remembered  throughout  eternity  !  Bless  the  Lord,  0  my  soul! 
Hitherto  has  He  blessed  me,  chastened,  upheld,  and  comforted 
me ;  and  even  down  to  old  age  has  He  carried  me." 

"This  morning,  was  led  in  prayer  to  ask  the  Lord,  if  it  were 
good  in  His  sight,  to  make  me  in  some  way  a  humble  instru- 
ment in  His  hands  of  good  to  Lord 's  precious,  never-dying 

soul.  It  came  twice,  after  waking  from  sleep,  so  forcibly  to 
my  mind,  that  I  felt  I  must  pray  for  him.  How  could  I  show 
my  regard  in  a  more  suitable  way  than  in  praying  that  he 
might  know  what  it  was  to  possess  durable  riches  and  honours; 
for  oh,  how  far  do  they  exceed  all  earthly  glory  !  Oh,  to  know 
to  a  certainty  that  God  hears  the  prayers  of  His  saints,  and 
not  one  shall  ever  be  disregarded.  The  Spirit  indites  them, 
the  Son  presents  them  in  the  incense  of  His  own  sacrifice,  and 
God  the  Father  is  well  pleased  to  honour  them  for  Christ's 
sake  and  His  own.  After  offering  up  my  humble  petition  for 
Lord ,  the  thought  occurred  to  me,  how  utterly  impossi- 
ble it  was  for  me  to  be  of  any  spiritual  service,  circumstances 
like  mountains  preventing.  But  the  thought  again  occurred, 
what  are  mountains  in  the  way  of  the  Lord's  purposes  ?  He 
can  do  all  things,  and  He  can  do  this.  There  I  leave  it.  My 
request  has  been  made,  and  if  not  through  me,  yet  through 
some  other  means,  may  God  bless  him  and  save  his  soul  at 
last." 

TO  HER    SON    O . 

"Brighton,  Feb.  18th. 

"E went  to  the  Town  Hall,  at  a  meeting  for  the  Jews, 

last  night.  Dr.  Marsh  spoke,  and  also  his  son.  She  says  the 
latter  spoke  remarkably  well  and  to  the  purpose.  We  have  a 
nice  circle  of  friends  here,  which  makes  it  pleasant.  As  it 
respects  myself,  one  or  two  to  whom  I  can  speak  of  Jesus,  of 
Him  whom  my  soul  loveth,  is  quite  sufficient.  What  a  com- 
pany I  shall  meet  (if  permitted  to  get  there)  in  heaven !  It 
makes  me  long  at  times  to  depart  and  be  with  them.     I  feel 


204  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    VvINSLOW. 

i  hat  all  is  true  that  is  written  of  Him ;  and  if  so,  I  shall  see 
llim  and  be  with  Him  for  ever.  On  His  resurrection  hangs 
all  my  hope.  If  He  is  risen,  my  soul  is  as  safe  as  if  it  were 
there  now.  The  whole  truth  of  the  gospel  hangs  on  the  res- 
urrection of  Christ.  I  am  writing  with  the  ocean  full  in  view, 
and  it  looks  beautiful  and  serene." 

"22nd. — How  continually  is  the  Christian's  experience  vary- 
ing, chiefly  through  the  varying  providences  of  God !  There 
is  a  close  connexion  between  what  is  passing  within  the 
believer  and  what  is  transpiring  without;  both  engaged  in 
furthering  the  work  of  the  Lord  in  His  kingdom  of  grace  in 
the  soul.  There  is  no  cessation.  The  Spirit  unceasing  in  His 
work,  and  Satan  as  busily  engaged  in  thw^arting  it,  through 
the  artful  and  corrupt  propensities  of  the  flesh.  How  heartily 
do  I  hate  the  flesh,  and  long  to  drop  the  body  of  sin,  and  be 
done  with  it  for  ever," 

"Monday It  seems  a  long  time  to  w^ait  for  the  post, 

before  I  can  hear  how  the  Lord  has  been  dealing  Avith  you  on 
the  Sabbath.  Had  I  not  Him  to  look  to  for  comfort,  I  know 
not  what  I  should  do.  Yesterday,  again  and  again  I  lifted  up 
my  burdened  heart  for  you ;  and  last  evening,  at  our  feast  of 
love  (the  Lord's  Supper),  I  forgot  you  not.  That  is  always 
an  especial  season  of  sweet  communion  between  my  soul  and 
my  God.  Jesus  sits  at  His  table,  and  I  am  permitted  to  sit  at 
His  blessed  feet,  and  many  gracious  tokens  of  love  do  I  re- 
ceive. Last  evening,  w4iile  thus  communing,  He  gave  me  a 
gentle  rebuke,  which  dissolved  my  heart  into  holy  contrition, 
and  laid  me  in  the  dust ;  but  oh,  how  condescending  His  love, 
no  tongue  can  tell !  I  w^ept — He  pardoned — showed  me  His 
loving  lie  art,  and  made  me  weep  still  more.  My  great  sin  was 
in  looking  to  an  arm  of  flesh,  instead  of  the  living  God ;  that 
God  w^lio  lias  said,  /  loill  never  leave  thee,  nor  forsake  thee. 
This  produced  a  murmuring  spirit,  and  sorrow  followed  in  its 
train.  But  I  was  to  go  to  the  table  where  Jesus  sat,  and 
obtain  a  full  view  of  Him,  before  my  sin  w^as  discovered  to 
me ;  and  then  did  I  prostrate  myself  before  Him,  confessing 
my  sin,  and  He  forgave  it  all.  He  looked  upon  me  as-  benig- 
nantly  and  lovingly  as  He  did  upon  Peter,  and  this  brought 
my  ingratitude  and  unbelief — God-dishonouring  unbelief — to 
mind ;  and  I  fell  before  Him  humbled,  penitent,  and  forgiven. 
Is  not  this  just  like  Jesus?  The  text  was.  Let  us  draw  near ; 
and  truly  did  a  good  and  gracious  God  draw  near  to  me,  uii- 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,  0 .  203 

worthy  though  I  was ;  and  my  prayer  then  ascended,  that  He 
would  draw  near  to  you  and  bless  you  with  strong  faith  in 
His  love  ;  for  there  is  no  love  like  the  love  of  God.  The  faint 
glimmer  of  a  rushlight,  compared  with  the  brightest  noonday 
sun,  is  the  love  of  the  creature,  the  tenderest  and  the  fondest, 
in  comparison  with  the  wondrous,  boundless  love  of  God  in 
our  nature — God  is  us." 

"...  I  have  nothing  particularly  new  to  tell  you;  but 
when  I  remember  that  the  Lord  is  especially  in  all  the  events 
of  His  providence  towards  His  people,  I  ought  not  to  say  I 
have  no  good  news  to  tell  you.  Jesus  reigns,  and  that  is  good 
news,  though  not  new  to  you.  And  yet  we  require  to  be  con- 
tinually reminded  of  it,  for  we  are  prone  in  our  v,-orldliness  to 
lose  sight  of  it,  and  then,  like  the  Israelites,  we  murmur. 
Jesus  is  alive,  and  at  the  right  hand  of  the  Majesty  on  high. 
He  is  at  the  helm,  guiding  our  vessel  skilfully  and  safely 
through  all  dangers  and  storms,  ever  varying  and  changing, 
through  this  eventful  voyage ;  and  He  Avill  most  assuredly 
bring  us  at  last  to  anchor,  where  all  suffering,  and  trial,  and 
perils  are  at  an  end  for  ever,  in  that  harbour  of  perfect  rest 
which  remaineth  for  the  people  of  God.  .  .  .  Civil  affairs  are 
just  now  in  rather  a  perplexed,  transition  state.  They  cannot 
form  a  government.  How  wonderful  the  way  God  takes  to 
accomplish  His  mighty  purposes  in  this  lower  world !  Who 
would  have  thought  that  the  potato  disease  would  have  been 
the  means  of  overthrowing  the  government,  v,'hich  but  a  short 
time  ago  seemed  so  strong  and  powerful  ?  But  so  it  is.  Sir 
Eobert  Peel  was  for  opening  the  ports ;  the  Duke  was  not ; 
and  this  broke  up  the  Cabinet.  Oh,  how  truly  God  is  in  all 
things !  By  the  most  trivial  and  mean  things,  in  His  allwise, 
wonderful  providence.  He  performs  His  wonders  and  accom- 
plishes His  purposes.  Never  mistrust  Him.  Let  us  keep  from 
unbelief,  walk  uprightly,  and  no  good  thing  will  He  withhold." 

"  Lord's  day.  ...  I  have  prayed  again  and  again  to-day 
for  you,  remembering  the  vast  importance  of  the  subject  on 
which  you  are  to  preach  ;  and  oh,  may  the  Holy  Ghost  descend 
with  all  His  mighty  power  upon  preacher,  saint.^,  and  sinners, 
that  great  good  may  be  done  in  the  name  of  Jesus  to  the  glory 
of  the  Tri-une  Jehovah.  I  was  enabled,  though  feeling  unv/ell, 
to  be  at  the  house  of  God  this  morning.  The  text  was.  The 
way  of  life  is  above  to  the  ivise,  thai  he  may  depart  from  hell 
beneath,  Prov.  xv.  24.     He  was  excellent,  as  usual,  and  spoko 


206  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

with  apparent  comfort ;  but,  0  Lord,  I  long  to  see  a  Avhole 
congregation  brought  under  the  power  of  the  Holy  Spirit. 
There  is  a  constant  hearing  of  sermons,  but  nothing  effectually 
done  in  comparison  with  what  ought  to  be  done.  Slumbering 
saints  and  dead  sinners  compose  most  of  the  congregations. 
Oh !  for  more  of  the  power  of  prayer  among  the  children  of 
the  kingdom.  How  my  soul  longs  for  it !  How  I  wish  I 
heard  in  those  who  wait  upon  the  sanctuary  more  of  the  enjoy- 
ment of  the  truth  in  their  own  souls,  and  of  the  sensible 
presence  of  the  Lord.  How  sweet  it  is  to  have  the  enjoyment 
of  nearness  to  God ;  and  how  can  we  feel  near  to  Him  and 
not  express  our  gratitude  and  love  for  His  kind  condescension  ? 
We  know  when  we  have  the  society  of,  and  enjoy  intercourse 
with,  an  earthly  friend ;  how  much  more  endearing  and  soul- 
refreshing  is  that  of  our  Heavenly  Friend !  The  defect  is,  we 
do  not  have  His  sensible  presence,  and  this  is  our  own  fault, 
and  not  His  ;  for  the  essence  of  His  nature  is  love — ^love,  free, 
unbounded  to  the  poorest,  the  vilest,  who  look  for  it,  expect  it, 
and  will  not  be  satisfied  without  it.  The  secret  is,  we  grow 
cold  towards  this  precious  Friend,  and  are  then  satisfied  to  do 
without  an  expression  of  His  love.  No  wonder  dear  Mr.  Evans 
remarked  to-day  that  'there  were  none  so  basely  ungrateful  on 
earth  as  God's  own  children.      And  so  it  is." 

"  How  often  does  God  answer  prayer  by  terrible  things  in 
righteousness !  When  we  are  in  a  thick  mist  we  can  discern 
nothing,  and  are  anxious  to  escape  from  its  perils.  But,  as  it 
rolls  away,  we  begin  to  see  a  gleam  of  light,  and  hail  it  as  the 
commencement  of  a  fuller  and  brighter  discovery.  Now  this 
is  often  the  case  w^ith  the  objects  of  God's  everlasting  love. 
We  pray  for  what  we  believe  would  promote  our  happiness 
and  the  comfort  of  others,  and  for  the  glory  of  God.  Perhaps 
we  do  not  in  so  many  words  ask  for  this  favour ;  but  we 
earnestly  desire  it  in  oiu:  hearts,  and  often  plan  in  our  minds 
how  it  may  be  brought  about.  God  sees  the  heart's  fond  wish, 
presently  iEIe  brings  us,  by  His  all-wise  providence,  to  the  very 
thing  we  desired ;  but  oh  !  in  such  a  different  way  from  what 
we  had  planned  in  our  own  minds.  And  yet,  how  much  more 
effectually  has  He  done  it  than  we  had  thought.  Such  is  our 
God,  and  it  is  a  mercy  when  we  do  see  His  blessed  hand  in 
every  dispensation  towards  His  own  elect.  But  how  few — 
how  very  few — wat'^h  the  hand  and  the  doings  of  God,  and 
lacking  this,  they  continue  blind  to  His  great  goodness  and  His 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,  0 .  207 

unceasing  care.  How  many  walk  with  a  sickly  Christianity, 
and  although  often  tried,  they  seem  not  to  profit  from  their 
trials,  because  they  are  not  earnest  in  watching  God's  loving 
hand.  For  years  they  are  under  the  rod,  yet  we  see  so  little 
real  advance.  Oh  !  let  us  watch  against  an  infidel  Christianity, 
if  I  may  so  express  myself;  for  there  is  so  much  infidelity  in 
our  fallen  nature  still  lingering  in  the  renewed  heart,  that  we 
have  reason  mightily  to  pray  against  it.  The  believer  should 
seek  to  make  the  most  of  his  trials.  They  are  disguised 
covenant  blessings,  and  as  such,  in  love  are  sent.  We  should 
pray  over  them,  and  pray  in  them,  and  regard  them  all  as 
designed  but  to  prepare  us  for  an  eternal  glory.  They  are  sent 
for  an  especial  purpose,  to  accomplish  an  especial  good." 

"  Thus,  then,  it  is  good  to  see  God  answering  our  prayer, 
although  it  be  by  sharp  trials  of  faith.  This  tried  faith  glorifies 
God,  purifies  our  hearts,  endears  Jesus  as  a  precious  Sympa- 
thizer in  our  sorrows,  and  fits  us  for  His  dwelling-place.  We 
may  not,  as  I  have  remarked,  see  how  God  is  working  for  us 
in  the  event ;  for,  in  the  language  of  Job,  Men  see  7iot  the  bright 
light  lohich  is  in  the  clouds^  hut  the  loind  passeth  and  deanseth 
them^  and  then  the  bright  light  is  visible.  I  bless  God  again  and 
again  for  His  most  trying  dispensations  ;  and  that  He  has  given 
me,  even  such  a  one  as  me,  to  see  Him  in  all  things  connected 
with  my  present  good  and  eternal  happiness.  What  losers  are 
some  of  God's  children,  who  watch  not  and  see  not  Him  in 
every  step  they  take  through  the  wilderness  world  !  Oh  !  it 
is  inexpressibly  sweet  to  walk  with  God  full  in  view ;  to  trace 
Him  in  everything — in  creation,  in  providence,  in  grace,  in  all 
things  on  earth  and  in  heaven.  What  manner  of  person  ought 
we  to  be  in  all  holy  conversation,  who  have  thus  to  do  with 
God !  Keep  a  steady  eye  upon  His  ways,  although  they  may 
be  at  times  wrapped  in  mystery.  Watch  the  leadings  of  His 
providence ;  be  careful  not  to  go  from  Him ;  there  is  the 
danger.  Follow  after,  and  patiently  wait  with  a  watchful  eye, 
and  a  praying  heart,  and  a  trusting  mind.  His  doings,  seeking 
childlike  obedience  to  His  most  blessed,  loving  will.  And 
when  the  Lord  thus  brings  our  self-willed  hearts  into  meek 
submission,  so  that  we  are  perfectly  sati  fied  to  have  Him  to 
do  with  and  by  us  as  best  pleases  and  glorifies  Him,  having 
no  choice  in  this  or  that,  then  it  is  God  Avorks  like  Himselfj 
educes  good  from  evil,  and  brings  light  out  of  darkness." 
"  How  much  of  needless  care  and  anxietv  does  unbelief  cut 


208  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MAllY    WIXSLOW. 

out  for  the  tried  believer  in  this  wilderness  world  !  Distrust, 
base,  ungratefid  distrust,  seems  to  follow  close  at  my  side,  to 
mar  present  comforts,  and  to  dishonour  Him  whom,  in  spite  of 
all,  my  soul  loveth.  Since  four  o'clock  this  morning,  the  hour 
at  which  I  awoke,  has  this  enemy  had  a  hard  contest  with  me. 
I  went  to  the  Lord  and  asked  for  that  help  which  only  He 
could  give  ;  but  it  was  not  until  half-an-hour  ago  I  opened  my 
Bible,  and  my  eye  rested  on  the  53rd  Isaiah,  4tli  verse :  Surely 
He  hath  home  our  griefs  and  carried  our  sorrows.  At  once  my 
base  ingratitude  dissolved  my  heart  into  deep  contrition,  and 
tears  flowed  down  my  cheeks.  Did  he  indeed  carry  my 
sorrows,  wdiich  I  must  have  carried  through  eternity?  Did 
He  bear  my  grief,  was  He  striken  for  my  transgression,  for 
which  hell  must  have  been  my  portion  for  ever  ?  Even  for 
this  my  sin  of  distrust  did  He  suffer,  and  shall  I  doubt,  for  one 
moment,  of  His  wondrous  love,  unceasing  and  unchanging? 
He  was  indeed  the  Antitype  of  the  ram  caught  in  the  thicket, 
and  offered  up  in  my  stead,  as  a  burnt-offering  to  a  holy  God, 
and  by  His  stripes  my  soul  is  healed,  and  healed  for  ever. 
How  marvellous  is  the  display  of  electing  love  and  sovereign 
grace  to  such  a  one  as  me !  How  do  I  abhor  myself  in  dust 
and  in  ashes,  while  I  remember  that,  unless  upheld  and  pre- 
served by  that  same  love,  the  very  next  difficulty  that  occurs 
will  find  me  as  distrustful  and  doulDting  as  ever.  What  a  God 
is  ours  !  He  loves  to  pardon  and  delights  in  mercy.  And  yet, 
God  forbid  that  we  should  think  lightly  of  sin  because  He  is 
so  good  and  ready  to  forgive !" 

to  her  son,  rev.  g.  e.  w. ,  on  iiis  illness. 

"Dearest  G , 

"God  is  love,  and  this  has  been  most  blessedly 
manifested  to  us  from  first  to  last.  He  has  been  to  us  a  God 
hearing  and  a  God  answering  prayer ;  and  yet  he  has  not  left 
us  without  a  Father's  chastening  hand.  As  His  children.  His 
redeemed  ones.  He  has  caused  us  to  pass  under  the  rod,  but  it 
has  been  in  such  a  tender,  gentle  way,  and  so  blended  with 
manifestations  of  love  and  goodness,  that  we  have  to  bless 
and  praise  Him  for  it  all.  lie  is  raising  you  up  again,  I  trust, 
{or  greater  usefulness,  and  more  devotedness  of  heart  and  life. 
It  is  no  small  matter  to  l^e  a  consistent  Christian,  an  Israelite 
indeed^  in  whom  there  is  no  gvile.  To  accomplish  this  great 
end,  we  too  often  need  the  discipline  of  that  covenant  which 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,  REV.  C.  E.  W.  209 

is  ordered  in  all  things  and  sure — and  we  shall  have  it.  How 
often  and  how  much  do  we  mistake  the  character  of  God ! 
We  think  He  is  such  a  one  as  ourselves ;  but  He  must  do  all 
Pie  has  declared  that  He  will,  because  He  is  God.  7,  the  Lord^ 
change  not.  There  is  no  after  purpose  or  thought  with  God  ! 
He  sees  the  end  from  the  beginning.  This  is  a  delightful  sub- 
ject for  contemplation ;  and  if  you  will  give  it  your  attention, 
restricting  yourself  to  the  study  only  of  God's  pure  word, 
comparing  scripture  with  scripture,  you  will  find  a  delightful 
field  of  truth  in  which  to  roam,  w^orthy  the  labour  of  a  whole 
life ;  for  out  of  it  will  grow  many  most  precious  and  important 
truths,  on  other  branches  of  the  glorious  gospel  of  our  Lord 
and  Saviour  Jesus  Christ.  ...  I  should  have  wished  to  have 
been  with  you,  but  it  seems  I  was  to  stop  here  for  a  season, 
and  this  was  without  my  own  planning,  and  therefore  I  know 
it  to  be  of  the  Lord.  Oh  how  much  infidelity  there  is  in  our 
fallen  nature  to  contend  with,  all  our  journey  through.  May 
the  Lord  increase  our  faith !  Let  me  hear  from  yourself,  how 
you  are  and  how  you  feel,  I  was  grateful  for  your  last,  and 
praise  God  on  your  belialf." 

"  A  holy  familiarity  between  God  and  His  redeemed  chil- 
dren is  most  lovely  and  blessed.  He  feeds  the  lamp  and  keeps 
it  burning,  and  the  soul  rests  quietly  in  the  hands  of  the  best 
of  Friends,  and  best  of  Fathers.  I  think  tliat,  in  general,  we 
do  but  take  too  superficial  a  view  of  what  sin  is  in  the  sight  of 
God,  a  holy  God,  and  we  do  not  sufficiently  examine  our 
hearts  by  Plis  holy  law.  Such  a  view  of  what  sin  is  would 
make  us  cling  closer  to  the  cross  of  Christ ;  it  would  send 
us  oftener  to  the  atoning  blood  for  cleansing,  and  endear 
to  us  the  preciousness  and  worth  of  a  throne  of  grace.  It 
would  also  keep  us  from  being  mere  yea  and  nay  Christians, 
or  half-hearted  Christians,  and  make  us  more  earnest  for  the 
salvation  of  others.  It  would,  too,  enable  us  to  form  a  better 
judgment  of  our  own  case,  as  well  as  more  clearly  discerning 
the  case  of  others,  A  slight,  imperfect  knowledge  of  what  sin 
is,  leads  to  almost  every  evil  a  Christian  is  liable  to  fall  in,  and 
is  dishonouring  to  God.  Let  us  look  more  at  what  He  inflicted 
upon  His  beloved  Son  for  sins  not  His  own.  Oh  pray  to  have 
just  that  insight  into  it  as  may  make  you  cling  more  to  Christ, 
and  fit  you  for  increased  usefulness  to  souls.  May  the  Lord 
lead  you  into  all  truth,  keep  your  eye  and  heart  towards  Him- 
self, moment  by  moment,  and  make  you  a  faithful  minister  of 
Jesus  Christ. 


CHAPTER    X. 

Compassion  for  the  well-being  of  souls  is  one  of  the  most 
holy  and  spontaneous  impulses  of  our  religion.  In  this  con- 
sists what  is  termed,  the  '  energies  of  Christianity.'  Chris- 
tianity is  not  a  person,  but  an  idea ;  and  the  development  of 
this  idea  in  the  soul  of  those  who  believe  and  obey  the  truth, 
inspiring  all  its  faculties,  and  consecrating  them  to  God,  is  the 
power  or  energy  of  Christianity.  "  The  expulsive  power  of  a 
new  affection,"  as  Dr.  Chalmers  beautifully  expresses  it,  dis- 
lodging from  the  heart  its  reigning  selfishness,  inspires  it  with  the 
feeling  and  sentiment  of  the  purest  benevolence,  which  yearns 
to  make  others  partake  of  its  joy.  When  Andrew  found  the 
Messiah,  moved  by  the  impulse  of  a  discovery  so  great,  he 
went  in  quest  of  his  brother  Simon,  and  "  brought  him  to 
Jesus."  The  impassioned  exclamation  of  the  Jewish  quceu,  as 
she  contemplated  the  threatened  massacre  of  her  nation,  may 
befittingly  express  the  intense  and  holy  solicitude  of  a  pious 
heart,  yearning  to  save  the  objects  of  its  love  from  a  more  cer- 
tain and  appalling  doom,  "  How  can  I  endure  to  see  the  de- 
struction of  my  kindred  ?"  And  yet,  while  thus  I  write,  we 
are  far  from  speaking  of  personal  faithfulness  on  the  subject  of 
religion  as  either  a  facile  or  a  pleasant  task.  Nay,  it  is  prob- 
ably the  most  difficult  and  delicate  of  all  Christian  duties. 
To  conquer  an  instinctive  feeling  of  delicacy  and  reserve;  to 
assume  an  appearance  of  superior  sanctity  ;  to  chill,  perhaps, 
affection  ;  forfeit  friendship ;  and  to  rouse  a  feeling,  if  not  of 
hostility,  yet  of  dislike,  and  yet  be  faithful^  demands  no  ordi- 
nary grace. 

AVe  have  already  spoken  of  her  passion  for  souls.  Never 
was  the  subject  absent  from  her  mind ;  it  entwined  itself  with 
all  her  thoughts,  engrafted  itself  on  all  her  actions,  breathed  in 
all  her  praj'ers.  Her  views  of  eternity  were  so  realizing,  her 
conviction  of  the  truth  of  the  gospel  was  so  strong,  and  her 
[210] 


HER   PASSION    FOR   SOULS.  211 

sense  of  the  preciousness  of  the  Saviour  was  so  great,  that  the 
interests  of  the  soul  rose  before  her  eye  with  a  magnitude  so 
vast,  and  a  solemnity  so  overpowering,  as  to  lessen  the  com- 
parative importance  of  every  other  object.  No  one  crossed 
her  path,  and  her  pen  traced  no  lines,  without  a  word  that  spoke 
of  a  world  to  come.  With  singular  appropriateness  might  she 
have  embodied  her  deep  and  holy  passion  in  the  expressive 
language  of  the  poet : — 

''  For  me,  when  I  forget  the  darling  theme, 
Be  my  tongue  mute,  my  fiincy  paint  no  more, 
And,  dead  to  joy,  forget  this  heart  to  beat." 

In  illustrating  the  importance  of  a  direct  appeal  to  individ- 
uals on  the  subject  of  personal  religion  she  would  frequent- 
ly quote  a  touching  incident,  related  to  her  when  at  Cam- 
bridge, of  the  late  excellent  Rev,  Charles  Simeon.  On  one 
occasion  he  was  summoned  to  the  dying-bed  of  a  brother. 
Entering  the  room,  his  relative  extended  his  hand  to  him,  and 
with  deep  emotion  said,  "  I  am  dying,  and  you  never  warned 
me  of  the  state  I  was  in,  and  of  the  danger  to  which  I  was  ex 
posed  from  neglecting  the  salvation  of  my  soul !"  "  Nay, 
my  brother,"  replied  Mr.  Simeon,  "I  took  every  reasonable 
opportunity  of  bringing  the  subject  of  religion  before  your 
mind,  and  frequently  alluded  to  it  in  my  letters."  "  Yes,"  ex- 
claimed the  dying  man,  "  you  did ;  but  that  was  not  enough. 
You  never  came  to  me,  closed  the  door,  and  took  me  by  the 
collar  of  my  coat,  and  told  me  that  I  was  unconverted,  and 
that,  if  I  died  in  that  state,  I  should  be  lost.  And  now  I  am 
dying,  and,  but  for  God's  grace,  I  might  have  been  for  ever 
undone  !"  It  is  said  that  this  affecting  scene  made  an  inefface- 
able impression  on  Mr.  Simeon's  mind.  To  this  startling  fact 
she  w^ould  add  another,  scarcely  less  affecting,  authenticated 
by  the  gentleman  to  whom  it  referred.  A  distinguished  Amer- 
ican clergyman  was  especially  and  deeply  concerned  for  the 
conversion  of  a  member  of  his  congregation  who,  from  his 
great  wealth  and  moral  worth,  occupied  a  position  in  society 
of  considerable  importance.  He  had'  for  years  attended  the 
faithful  ministrations  of  the  pastor,  but  as  yet  gave  no  evidence 
of  a  change  of  heart.  Regular  in  his  attendance  at  the  sanc- 
tuary, fascinated  with  the  eloquence  of  the  preacher,  and  gene- 
rous in  his  expression  of  admiration,  he  yet  remained  immersed 
in  the  world  and  without  the  pale  of  the  church.    His  minister 


212  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MAIIY    V\'INSLO\V. 

yearned  for  liis  conversion.  Calling  upon  him  early  one  morn- 
ing, he  requested  a  private  interview.  He  at  once  disclosed 
his  mission.  In  a  conversation,  brief  but  pointed,  earnest  but 
affectionate,  personal  but  courteous,  he  pressed  upon  his  friend's 
serious  attention  the  immediate  consideration  of  his  soul,  the 
claims  of  eternity,  and  the  duty  of  immediate  submission  to 
God.  The  solenm  appeal  was  listened  to  with  kindly  respect, 
but  with  the  brief,  emphatic  reply,  "  I  have  no  time  for  these 
things."  "Not  time!"  exclaimed  the  beseeching,  faithful 
minister,  "then,  sir,  you  must y???f?  time!"  With  these  brief 
but  thrilling  w^ords,  uttered  with  the  profoundest  solemnity,  he 
left  him.  The  merchant  repaired  to  his  counting-house,  and 
was  soon  immersed  in  the  world.  In  vain,  however,  he  strove 
to  give  his  thoughts  to  business ;  the  words,  "  You  must  find 
time,"  still  vibrated  on  his  ear,  and  excluded  every  other 
thought  from  his  mind.  Quitting  the  scene  of  his  gains,  he 
returned  to  his  home,  bowed  down  under  the  conviction  of  his 
lost  condition  as  a  sinner.  The  Spirit  of  God  was  now  mov- 
ing, as  of  old,  upon  the  dark,  disordered  elements  of  the  soul, 
and  soon  a  new  creation  Avas  to  spring  forth — holy,  beautiful, 
and  deathless.  In  a  few  days  the  object  of  this  holy  solicitude 
and  personal  appeal  became  a  new  creature  in  Christ  Jesus, 
and  afterwards  a  distinguished  and  useful  member  of  His 
church. 

Such  was  the  tender  fliithfulness  to  souls  she  was  wont  to 
urge  upon  all  Christians,  and  which  she  herself  so  beautifully 
exemplified.  AjjjjUcatio?!  of  gospel  truth  in  the  pulpit,  and 
direct  personal  appeal  out  of  it,  were  points  upon  which  she 
would  insist  with  an  earnestness  and  solemnity  of  manner 
peculiarly  her  own.  It  was  no  slight  evidence  of  the  sincer- 
ity and  depth  of  her  holy  sympathies,  that  she  shrunk  not 
from  the  task  of  addressing,  on  all  the  momentous  subjects  of 
religion,  individuals  occupying  high  places  of  responsibility  in 
the  land.  She  was  frequently,  and  with  tears,  heard  impas- 
sionately  to  exclaim,  "  Oh,  who  will  warn — who  will  entreat 
them  ?  "  Copies  of  letters  thus  addressed,  w^ere  found  among 
her  papers,  one  or  two  of  wdiicli  may  be  given,  as  illustrating 
this  noble  feature  of  her  Christian  character. 

"to  the  duke  of  . 


"  Understanding  that  your  Grace  knew  Colonel  Mackinnon, 
of  the  Coldstream  Guards,  and  having  heard  that  he  died  a 


LETTERS    TO    THE    DUKE    OF    .  213 

believer  in  the  Lord  Jesus — a  truly  converted  and  holy  man 
— I  have  taken  the  liberty  of  sending  you  a  copy  of  a  small 
book  of  prayers,  composed  by  himself,  and  expressing,  as  I 
trust,  the  true  breathings  of  his  heart.  A  few  friends  of  his, 
I  have  understood,  finding  them  among  his  manuscript  papers, 
published  them  after  his  death.  I  sliould  hope,  however, 
that  at  a  later  period  of  his  life,  clearer  light  was  vouchsafed 
him,  as  from  one  of  the  prayers,  which  I  shall  mark,  it  is  evi- 
dent he  then  had  not.  I  presume  that  as  you  knew  him  when 
a  young,  gay,  thoughtless  man  of  the  world,  his  conversion 
will  not  be  entirely  without  interest  to  you.  In  the  prayer  to 
w^hich  I  have  referred,  it  is  evident  that  he  is  mixing  up  his 
repentance  and  reformation,  in  some  degree,  with  the  atoning, 
finished  work  of  the  Saviour.  Now  it  is  clear  from  the  gos- 
pel of  Christ,  that  he  could  not  be  saved  by  any  work  done  in 
him,  nor  for  any  work  of  merit  done  by  him.  God  pardons, 
justifies,  and  saves  poor  sinners  for  Christ's  sake  alone.  It  is 
Christ's  obedience  and  death  which  honours  the  law  of  God, 
and  which  satisfies  divine  justice  on  our  behalf  The  Holy 
Spirit  works  repentance,  faith,  and  every  other  Christian  grace 
in  the  believer,  as  a  fruit  and  consequence  of  his  free  justifica- 
tion, not  to  justify  him,  or  to  fit  him  for  being  justified.  As  a 
believer  he  is  already  justified  by  the  Atonement  made  on  his 
behalf  by  the  Lord  Jesus.  We  are  saved  as  sinners,  not  as 
saints ;  and  if  we  come  to  Christ  lost  and  undone  in  ourselves, 
having  nothing  to  commend  us  to  His  notice,  or  to  propitiate 
His  favour,  and  seek  this  great  mercy  with  our  whole  heart, 
we  shall  surely  find  Him,  and  He  will  manifest  Himself  unto  us 
as  He  does  not  unto  the  world.  The  Lord  grant  that  you  may 
have  this  precious  blessing  before  you  go  hence.  It  is  a  peril- 
ous and  an  awful  thing  to  be  satisfied  with  a  form  of  godhness 
without  the  vital,  saving  power.  Except  a  man^  says  Christ, 
he  horn  again,,  he  cannot  see  the  kingdom  of  heaven.  Eternity 
and  an  immortal  soul,  surely,  are  solemn  realities,  and  not  to 
be  sported  with.  God,  w4th  whom  we  have  to  do,  is  holy  as 
well  as  merciful,  and  righteous  as  v^^ell  as  gracious.  Justice 
must  be  satisfied,  and  holiness  must  be  honoured,  ere  mercy  can 
reach  the  sinner.  Jesus  Christ  is  alone  able  to  save  you  from 
eternal  ruin ;  and  if  you  have  not  sought  Him  with  the  whole 
heart,  I  would  most  affectionately  and  earnestly  implore  your 
Grace  to  lose  not  a  moment  in  this  all-momentous  work.  The 
mistakes  of  time  cannot  be  rectified  in  eternity.     You  cannot 


214  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MiRY   WINSLOW. 

return  to  make  good  the  errors  of  the  present.  It  is,  there- 
fore, of  infinite  moment,  that  you  should  be  sure  that  you  are 
building  your  hope  of  heaven  upon  the  one,  only  foundation, 
which  is,  Christ  Jesus.  Believe  in  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ,  and 
thou  shalt  he  saved.  I  do  not  thus  address  you  because  I  think 
you  are  a  greater  sinner  than  myself,  or  than  thousands  who 
are  basing  their  acceptance  with  God  upon  unscriptural  and 
fatal  grounds ;  but  because  the  Lord  has  laid  you  much  upon 
my  mind ;  and  situated  as  you  are — encircled  by  the  pomp 
and  gilded  vanities  of  this  poor,  dying  world — it  was  not  likely 
that  the  truth,  the  precious  truth,  would  reach  your  ear.  I 
pray  God  that  you  may  be  faithful  to  your  own  soul,  and  be 
led  to  examine  yourself,  and  ascertain  if  you  are  prepared  to 
stand  at  the  bar  of  God.  He  may  summon  you  at  any  moment 
— at  midnight  the  cry  may  come,  'Prepare  to  meet  thy  God !' 
Come  to  Jesus  then,  just  as  you  are.  He  will  receive,  and 
Avelcome,  and  save  you,  for  He  will  in  nowise  cast  out  any 
who  come  to  Him.  Come  as  a  poor,  bankrupt  sinner ;  come 
empty  and  self-loathing ;  come  with  a  life  of  sin,  and  rebellion, 
and  folly :  only  come  to  Jesus,  and  He  will  be  gracious  and 
and  save  you,  luithout  money  and  without  price.  This  is  from 
one  who  wishes  to  meet  you  at  the  right  hand  of  Christ. 


"to  lokd  ,  on  his  illness. 

"My  Lord, — 

"  I  have  heard  with  regret  that  you  are  ill,  seriously  ill,  and 
likely  soon  to  stand  before  God.  Permit  me,  with  unfeigned 
respect  and  sincere  sympathy,  to  approach  you  with  the  ques- 
tion. Are  you  ready  ?  Are  you  prepared  for  the  solemn  change 
that  awaits  you?  Eternity,  with  its  dread  realities,  is  before 
you,  and  you  have  a  soul  to  be  saved  or  lost  for  ever  !  What, 
at  the  present  moment,  can  be  of  such  importance  to  you  as  a 
correct  knowledge  of  your  real  condition  as  a  sinner  in  the 
sight  of  a  holy  God,  who  searcheth  the  heart?  You  must  be 
sensible  that  you  have  hitherto  lived  in  neglect  of  your  soul, 
in  forgetfulness  of  God,  and  in  oblivion  of  eternity.  The 
world  with  all  its  pomps  and  gaieties,  its  interests  and  honours, 
has  had  complete  control  of  your  mind,  and  full  possession  of 
your  heart.  You  have  lived  ivithout  God  and  without  hope  in 
the  world.  That  you  may  have  observed  the  forms  of  godli- 
ness I  admit,  but  God  will  not  be  mocked  with  a  mere  exter- 


LETTER    TO    LORD    .  215 

v.rI  vrork ;  He  has  to  do  with  the  heart.  Plis  language  is,  My 
.<?o;7,  give  me  thy  heart.  And  now,  my  lord,  you  are  about  to 
appear  in  the  presence  of  this  holy  Lord  God,  who  is  just  to 
Himself,  while  He  is  most  merciful  to  the  sinner.  Most  ear- 
n vastly  and  respectfully  do  I  urge  upon  you  the  immediate  con- 
sideration of  the  things  that  make  for  your  eternal  peace. 
Trifle  not  with  your  endangered  and  immortal  soul.  Even 
now,  at  the  eleventh  hour,  you  may  find  mercy.  The  fatal 
error  in  your  present  state  may  be  a  false  security,  or  a  reli- 
ance upon  the  mere  mercy  of  God's  character,  not  knowing 
that  if  He  does  not  accept  you  in  the  righteousness  of  Christ, 
He  is  to  you,  and  will  be  to  all  eternity,  a  consuming  fire. 
Flee  to  the  Saviour  now  as  a  lost,  self-ruined,  and  helpless  sin- 
ner. Listen  to  His  own  most  gracious  and  encouraging  word, 
God  so  loved  the  luorld,  that  He  gave  His  only-hegotten  Son^ 
that  luhosoever  helievcth  in  Him  should  not  perish^  hut  have  ever- 
lasting life.  Do  not  reply,  'I  do  believe,'  if  your  belief  is  but 
the  bare  assent  of  the  understanding  to  the  truth  of  the  gos- 
pel. With  the  iii:art  man  helieveth  unto  righteousness.  If, 
with  the  penitent  jailer,  you  truly  believe  in  the  Lord  Jesus 
Christ,  if  your  faith  is  a  simple  coming  to  Jesus,  as  a  lost,  un- 
done sinner,  receiving  Him  with  your  whole  heart,  you  will 
experience  a  joy,  and  peace,  and  hope,  which  nothing  in  this 
poor  world  could  ever  give  or  take  away.  Cease  not  to 
wrestle  with  Him  in  prayer  until  He  bless  you.  Yield  your 
heart,  if  now  a  conviction  of  guilt  burdens  it,  if  now  a  sense 
of  sorrow  saddens  it,  to  the  gracious  invitation  of  the  Saviour, 
Come  unto  me,  all  ye  that  labour  and  are  heavy  laden,  and  I  will 
give  you  rest.  Seek  that  rest  nowhere  else  but  in  Christ.  The 
heart  of  Jesus  overflows  with  love  to  sinners.  It  was  to  save 
sinners  He  condescended  to  hve,  and  consented  to  die.  He 
came  to  seek  and  to  save  that  luhich  teas  lost.  Those  who  seek 
Him  with  the  whole  heart  shall  certainly  find  Him,  Oh,  lose  no 
time  !  Ever}^  moment  is  of  more  value  to  you  now  than  ten 
thousand  worlds.  Close  your  door,  and  exclude  every  object 
uom  3'our  mind  l)ut  Clirist.  Be  importunate,  and  give  Him 
no  rest  imtil  you  yourself  find  rest  in  His  atoning  work,  and 
the  Holy  Ghost,  in  the  riches  of  His  mercy,  applies  to  your 
conscience  that  precious  blood  of  Christ  that  can  alone  impart 
peace  to  a  poor,  guilty,  condemned  sinner.  Banish  from  your 
mind  the  notion  of  making  your  peace  with  God.  It  is  only 
the  Lord  Jesus  who  can  make  our  peace,  by  becoming,  as  Ho 


216  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

has  done,  a  peace-oflfering  to  God  for  us.     To  Him,  then,  flee, 
who  saves  to  the  uttermost  all  who  come  unto  God  hy  HimP 

to  the  archbishop  of  ,  on  baptismal  regeneration. 

"  My  Lord  Archbishop, — 

"  Observing,  by  the  papers,  that  the  case  of  Mr.  G is 

soon  to  come  before  you  for  adjudication,  I  presume  to  address 
you  on  the  subject.  It  is  as  a  fellow-behever  in  the  Lord 
Jesus  that  I  take  this  hberty,  feehng  that  the  question,  that  is 
to  pass  under  your  consideration,  is  closely  connected  with  the 
glory  of  God  and  the  honour  of  our  Redeemer.  Eternity  is 
before  us,  and  at  the  tribunal  of  God  you  and  I  will  soon 
stand,  pardoned,  I  humbly  trust,  by  the  blood  and  justified  by 
the  righteousness  of  Christ.  It  is  with  a  close  realization  of 
this  solemn  fact  I  now  write.  The  doctrine  of  Baptismal 
Regeneration, — a  doctrine  which,  by  those  who  hold  it,  is 
made  to  take  the  place  of  the  renewing,  quickening  power  of 
the  Holy  Ghost — is  a  dogma  not  found  in  the  Word  of  God. 
That  it  may  be  taught  in  the  writings  of  men  I  admit — and  it 
is  appalling  to  reflect  how  many  souls,  deluded  and  ensnared 
by  this  error,  have  gone  to  their  account  '  with  a  lie  in  their 
right  hand,'  cauglit  in  this  net  of  Satan — but  it  has  no  place 
in  the  Bible.  The  Word  of  God  is  the  Christian's  sole  rule 
of  faith.  It  is  from  this  word  we  are  to  draw  the  truths  we 
believe — by  this  word  we  are  to  order  our  steps — and  by  this 
word  we  shall  be  judged  in  the  last  day.  '  To  the  law  and 
to  the  testimony.'  A  most  solemn  admonition  meets  us  at  the 
close  of  this  sacred  record.  If  any  man  shall  add  unto  these 
things^  God  shall  add  unto  him  the  plagues  that  are  written  in 
this  hook.  Thus  jealously  has  God  guarded  the  purity  of  His 
holy  word.  He  has  spoken  it,  and  I  believe  it.  Baptismal 
Regeneration  has  been  added  by  the  dictum  and  teaching  of 
men  as  a  doctrine  to  be  believed.  For  this  He  has  a  contro- 
versy with  His  church.  I  believe  that  He  is  sifting  her,  and 
is  showing,  by  the  existence  and  spread  of  Puseyism,  the 
great  iniquity  of  those  who  have  engrafted,  and  would  engraft, 
upon  the  revealed  word  an  error  so  fatal  to  souls,  and  so  dis 
honouring  to  the  work  of  the  Holy  Spirit.  I  do  most  respect 
fully  and  earnestly  implore  you  to  ponder  well  your  position. 
Seek  counsel  from  the  Most  High.  May  He  enable  you  to 
set  aside  the  world's  opinion,  and  to  act  with  your  eye  fixed 


LETTER   TO   THE   ARCHBISHOP  OP .  217 

upon  tlie  great  white  throne  anrl  in  view  of  an  endless  eter- 
nity. How  many  have  passed  into  the  eternal  world  fatally 
deceived  by  this  error  !  Baptized  in  infancy,  they  were  taught 
to  view  themselves  as  spiritually  regenerated,  as  made  the 
children  of  God;  and  they  died,  it  is  to  be  feared,  with  no 
more  light  and  no  more  grace,  believing  they  were  safe.  Ter- 
rible delusion  !  I  beseech  you  to  enter  your  solemn  and  de- 
cided protest  against  this  insidious  and  spreading  error.  Who 
can  tell  but  that  God  has  placed  you  in  your  present  eminent 
position,  in  order  to  deal  a  death-blow  at  this  unscriptural  and 
fatal  dogma.  "When  the  Jewish  nation  was  to  be  massacred, 
Mordecai  said  to  the  queen :  If  thou  altogether  holdest  thy  peace 
at  this  time,  then  shall  there  enlargement  and  deliverance  arise  to 
the  Jews  from  another  quarter.  .  .  .  And  who  knoiveth 
whether  thou  art  come  to  the  kingdom  for  such  a  time  as  this  ? 
May  the  Lord  God  impart  to  your  grace  all  wisdom,  prudence, 
and  faithfulness  to  do  His  will  in  this,  and  in  all  things  con- 
nected with  His  glory.  Soon  will  He  come  whose  right  it  is 
to  reign  !  All  the  devices  of  Satan,  and  all  false  doctrine,  and 
erroneous  teaching  of  men,  will  then  vanish  before  Him.  Oh, 
let  us  meet  our  God  wnth  unspotted  hands  !  Cleansed  by  the 
blood  of  atonement,  and  sanctified  by  the  indwelling  Spirit, 
we  shall  stand  complete,  not  having  spot  or  wrinkle  or  any  such 
thing.  Regard  me  as  one  who  prayerfully  desires  to  see  you, 
in  your  present  position  of  responsibility  and  influence,  act 
boldly  for  God,  for  His  truth,  and  for  His  one  church,  so  that 
His  dear  and  blessed  name  be  not  dishonoured. 

TO  A G ,   ESQ.,   OF  NEW  YORK. 

"  Dear  Friend,—  May  3, 1848. 

"  I  was  much  grieved  to  hear  that  your  dear  mother 
was  no  more.  I  believe  she  loved  the  Lord  Jesus,  and  that 
she  is  now  with  Him  who  loved  her,  and  washed  her  from  her 
sins  in  His  own  most  precious  blood,  I  cannot  forget  her. 
Very  dear  was  she  to  me.  Many  hours  of  happy  inter 
course  we  have  had  together ;  and  the  sincere,  disinterested 
affection  manifested  towards  me  and  mine  has  never  been 
forgotten.  I  never  cease  to  love,  or  can  forget  old  friends. 
And  oh,  what  a  joy  it  is  to  know  that,  although  she  is  gone 
from  earth,  I  shall  see  her  again,  and  enjoy  a  far  more  delight- 
ful intercourse  with  her  above  than  ever  I  did  below.  God 
be  praised  for  this  good  hot)e  through  grace.  This^  my  dear 
10 


218  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

Mr.  G ,  was  jour  denr  mother's  hope,  and  it  is  mine,  and 

oh,  may  it  be  yours!  Time  is  i^hort,  and  eternity,  with  all  its 
solemn  realities,  is  before  us.  Oh,  let  me  urge  upon  you  to 
give  your  mind,  your  heart,  your  every  |'(nver,  to  seek  earn- 
estly and  perseveringly  an  interest  in  tlic  Saviour  of  sinners ! 
What  can  the  world  do  for  you  at  a  dying  hour  ?  What  could 
the  wealth  of  ten  thousand  worlds  avail  you  when  you  stand 
before  the  judgment-seat  of  Christ  ?  When  I  last  saw  or 
heard  of  you,  you  were  an  unconverted  man.  But  how  is  it 
with  you  now  ?  Do  you  love  Jesus,  the  sinner's  Friend  ? 
Are  you  reconciled  to  God  ?  Do  you  know  Christ  for  your- 
self? Sincerely  do  I  trust  that  God  will  answer  your  precious 
mother's  ten  thousand  prayers,  offered  up  for  you,  her  only 
child  and  her  beloved  son.  You  were  everything  on  earth  to 
her.  May  you  meet  her  in  heaven !  Shall  I  tell  her  when  I 
meet  her  there  (for  soon  my  time  will  come),  that  you  are  on 
your  way  to  glory  ?  Write  and  tell  me  what  are  your  views 
on  the  all-important  subject  of  religion,  and  what  are  your 
hopes  for  eternity.  Oh,  flee  to  Jesus !  He  requires  no  work 
from  you  in  order  to  purchase  salvation.  It  is  His  own  free 
gift  of  everlasting  and  unchanging  love.  Go  to  Him,  then,  as 
you  are ;  He  will  open  His  arms  to  embrace  you,  more  glad 
to  receive  you  than  you  are  to  come.  He  came  into  the 
world  to  save  sinners — poor,  helpless,  lost  sinners — sinners  that 
could  do  nothing  to  save  themselves.  To  them  he  says.  Look 
unto  m,e,  and  he  ye  saved.  Him  that  cometh  unto  me,  I  will  in 
nowise  cast  out.  I  will  not  weary  you,  but  will  conclude,  only 
expressing  the  hope  that  you  will  let  me  hear  whether  you 
have  been  brought  to  sit  at  the  feet  of  the  Son  of  God,  that  I 
may  carry  the  news  to  your  dear  mother,  whom  ere  long  I 
hope  to  see,  when  we  shall  know  even  as  we  are  known,  and 
when  all  tears  will  be  wiped  from  our  eyes  for  ever.  Believe 
me,  heaven  is  worth  living  for,  and  worth  dying  for.  It  is  all 
true.  Heaven  is  true,  and  Christ  is  true,  and  God  is  true,  and 
His  word  is  true.  May  He  bless  you,  dear  friend,  and  save 
your  never-dying  soul. 

TO   E T c ,  ESQ. 

"Dear  C ,  June  3,  1848. 

"Poor  Mr.  0 is  dead!     Have  you  heard  of  it. 

If  so,  what  was  the  state  of  his  mind  ?  Write  and  tell  me. 
His  poor  wife,  bow  I  feel  for  her !     Is  not  this  a  solemn  call  to 


corhespondencb.  219 

us  all  ?  "What  is  our  life  ?  How  uncertain  !  and  yet  is  it  not 
awfully  true  that  poor  wretched  man  rushes  heedlessly  on, 
thoughtless  of  what  awaits  him  in  an  endless  eternity  ?  Oh, 
that  we  who  profess  to  have  our  eyes  open — we  who  profess 
to  know  the  way,  the  truth,  and  the  life — did  but  so  let  our 
light  shine  around  us,  that  others  might  be  led  to  seek  the 
same  mighty  blessings  that  await  all  who  value  their  own 
souls !     Dear  friend,  this  is  a  solemn  warning  to  you  and  to 

me.     Poor  0 is  gone !  and  we  are  travelling  fast  through 

this  wilderness  world,  and  soon  shall  pass  away  too.  Let  us, 
then,  feel  more  like  pilgrims  and  strangers  here.  Let  us  not 
seek  our  rest  where  our  precious  Jesus  had  no  place  to  lay  His 
head.  Let  us  rejoice  more  in  the  prospect  of  that  glorious  in- 
heritance prepared  for  us  above,  where  He  is  who  hath  loved 
us  unto  the  death.  Oh,  for  ten  thousand  world  would  I  not 
have  my  portion  here !     But  I  only  intended  when  I  took  my 

pen  to  inquire  of  you  any  particulars  of  poor  0 's  state  of 

mind  before  he  departed.  He  was  your  friend,  I  presume,  or 
what  the  Avorld  calls  a  friend.  Will  you  not  go  and  see  his 
poor  wife  ?  Be,  in  the  best  sense,  the  good  Samaritan  to  her 
now.  Visit  her  in  her  sorrow,  and  lead  her  mind  to  Jesus, 
the  Friend  of  the  friendless.  Such  has  He  been  to  me  and 
mine,  and  as  such  I  can  commend  Him  to  all.  Oh,  that  all 
did  but  know  Him,  then  all  must  and  would  love  Him !  My 
love  to  your  wife.     I  wish  I  knew  her  better. 

TO  I W ,   ESQ.,   BOSTON,   U.  S.,   ON  THE  ATONEMENT. 

"Dear  Friend, —  London,  June  6,  1848. 

"Although  I  have  not  written  to  you  for  some  time, 
yet  you  have  been  much  in  my  thoughts,  and  I  determined,  in 
the  strength  of  the  Lord,  to  address  you  once  more,  and,  per- 
haps, for  the  last  time  on  this  side  of  eternity.  You  and  I  are 
hastening  fast  through  time.  At  the  longest  period  of  our  ex- 
istence it  is  but  short.  But,  oh,  our  spiritual  existence!  where 
and  when  will  it  end  ?  Never,  never !  It  is  a  solemn  and 
awful  truth,  yet  to  the  Christian  dehghtful.  As  long  as  the 
existence  of  God  Himself,  so  will  be  ours.  Because  I  live 
(says  Christ),  ye  shall  live  also.  It  is  a  blessed  thought  that 
the  Triune  God — the  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Ghost — are  all 
engaged  in  the  salvation  of  a  poor  sinner.  The  Father  so 
loved  the  world  as  to  give  His  only-begotten  Son.     The  Son, 


220  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

Jesus  Christ,  came  into  the  world  to  save  sinners.  And  it  was 
through  the  Eternal  Spirit  He  offered  himself  without  spot 
unto  God.  Tlie  whole  seventh  chapter  of  Hebrews  is  full  of 
the  precious  Atonement  made  by  Christ  for  the  redemption 
of  the  soul.  Without  the  shedding  of  blood  there  can  be  no  re- 
mission. I  could  wish,  if  possible,  to  be  much  in  earnest  on 
this  subject ;  as  it  is  here,  my  dear  friend,  I  fear  that  we  differ. 
If  I  am  not  saved  by  the  Atonement  made  on  Calvary,  I  am 
yet  in  my  sins,  and  am  unsaved.  To  be  sound  in  the  doctrine 
is  needful  (as  you  justly  observe),  for  who  can  build  a  hope  of 
heaven  on  any  other  foundation  than  that  which  is  laid,  Jesus 
Christ  himself,  the  chief  corner-stone  ?  This  one  foundation  is — 
God  manifest  in  the  flesh — offered  and  making  a  full  and  suffi- 
cient atonement  for  the  sins  of  His  people,  laid  to  His  account 
by  the  hands  of  Eternal  Justice.  He  ivas  made  sin  for  us, 
who  knew  no  sin,  that  we  might  be  made  the  righteousness  of 
God  in  Him.  Without  the  Divine  Atonement,  I  repeat, 
I  am  lost  for  ever.  No  mere  creature  could  atone  for  the 
sins  of  millions  of  the  human  race.  It  was  the  Divinity  of 
Christ  that  made  efficacious  all  that  he  did  and  suffered. 
His  resurrection  was  a  receipt  from  Divine  Justice  that 
ample  satisfaction  had  been  given  for  the  broken  law  of  a 
holy  God.  All  our  righteousness  is  but  as  filthy  rags,  and 
how  can  we  commend  ourselves  to  God  but  as  we  stand 
in  a  better  righteousness  than  our  own?  I  feel  my  journey 
drawing  to  its  close,  and  if  I  had  to  put  my  finger  upon  one 
single  good  action  that  I  have  ever  done  during  my  life  that 
was  not  tainted  and  defiled  by  sin,  as  a  term  of  my  salvation, 
I  should  be  eternally  separated  from  God,  Sin  is  mixed 
with  every  thought,  and  nothing  but  the  blood  of  Jesus  Christ 
can  cleanse  us  from  its  defilement.  If  Christ  is  (not  the  power 
of  God)  not  God  Himself — God  in  our  nature — He  could  not 
have  atoned  for  one  single  soul  of  Adam's  race.  On  this  doc- 
trine of  the  Atonement  hangs  our  everlasting  happiness.  Our 
eternal  all  is  at  stake.  Oh,  let  us  never  forget  that  Jesus 
Christ  came  into  the  world  to  save  sinners !  My  only  hope  is 
in  this ;  and  I  believe  I  shall  be  saved  through  the  vicarious 
sacrifice  made  on  the  cross,  when  he  exclaimed.  It  is  finished. 
The  Holy  Ghost,  too,  the  Third  Person  in  the  glorious  Trinity, 
performs  His  part  in  this  great  work,  in  applying  the  atoning 
blood  to  the  conscience,  renewing,  sanctifying,  and  taking  pos- 
session of  the  soul  here,  and  fitting  it  for  the  full  enjoyment  of 


UNION    WITfl    CHRIST.  221 

the  glory  that  awaits  it  hereafter.  May  the  Lord  the  Spirit 
open  our  eye  to  see,  and  our  heart  to  receive  the  truth  as  it 
is  in  Jesus.     Love  to  all  your  circle. 

TO  J.  T ,   ESQ.,   ox   REALIZING    OUR    ONENESS    WITH  CHRIST. 

"Dear  Christian  Friend, —  May  30th,  1848. 

"  I  have  just  received  yours,  and  hasten  to  answer 
it.  I  am  never  Letter  prepared  to  reply  to  a  letter  than  when 
I  first  receive  it.  The  memory  is  treacherous,  and  at  74  (this 
is,  I  suppose,  the  case  with  all  dying  mortals)  particularly  so. 
But  I  am  wrong ;  the  believer  in  Christ  is,  in  a  sense,  immor- 
tal. For  although  the  body  dies,  it  only  sleeps  in  Jesus,  and 
shall  be  raised  again  at  the  last  day.  Three  times  in  one  chap- 
ter Jesus  says,  /  ivill  raise  it  up  again  at  the  last  day.  Here  is 
comfort  for  you  and  me.  Is  Jesus  increasingly  precious  to 
you  ?  I  gather  from  your  letter  that  He  is  so.  Bless  Him  for 
it.  He  is  faithful  to  all  His  exceeding  great  and  precious  prom- 
ises, and  by  them  we  are  made  partakers  of  the  divine 
nature.  Keep  hold  of  your  oneness  with  Christ.  If  we  lose 
sight  of  that  blessed  truth,  we  are  at  sea  in  a  moment.  I  in 
you  and  you  in  me.  Think,  then,  that  Jesus  and  you  are  one ; 
one  in  time,  and  one  in  eternity  ;  never  separated,  and  insepara- 
ble. Oh,  how  this  precious  truth  should  be  ever  present  with 
us  on  all  occasions,  at  home  and  abroad,  in  public  and  in  pri- 
vate, living  or  dying  !  Dear  brother,  go  on  to  know  more  of 
the  power  of  the  resurrection  of  Christ  in  your  soul,  that  you 
may  thereby  glorify  Him  who  is  your  life,  and  that  you  may 
be  more  abundantly  useful  in  His  service.  I  am  glad  to  hear 
that  you  have  been  able  to  do  good  in  the  name  of  your  belov- 
ed Lord.  Time  is  short — life  is  uncertain.  Let  us,  then,  em- 
ploy the  talent  God  has  given  us,  that  we  may  have  more  abun- 
dantly. Each  behever  has  his  or  her  gift,  whatever  that 
gift  may  be ;  and  Christ  says.  Occupy  until  I  come.  Let  us 
not  bury  our  talent  in  earthly  things,  for  these  pass  away,  and 
we  shall  live  for  ever.  We  are  on  a  journey  the  most  event- 
ful that  ever  an  immortal  undertook.  We  must  press  forward. 
There  is  no  standing  still  in  this  journey.  We  are  to  follow 
on  to  know  the  Lord ;  to  grow  in  grace.  You  have  already 
travelled  some  stages  in  this  heavenly  road  since  I  saw  you ; 
but  there  is  much  of  the  good  land  yet  to  be  possessed.  We 
are  to  go  forward  to  know  more  of  Christ  and  of  our  election 


222  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW, 

of  God ;  so  shall  we  be  happy  in  our  souls  and  established  in 
the  truth.  I  am  often  grieved  in  meeting  some,  professing 
godliness,  who  seem  to  be  standing  still  in  the  same  place  for 
years,  and  know  no  more  of  God  than  at  the  first.  .  .  Let 
us,  then,  live  near  to  Christ,  and  go  oftener  to  Him.  I  find, 
from  long  experience,  that  confession  of  sin  is  one  of  the  most 
healthful  exercises  of  the  renewed  soul — constant  and  imme- 
diate confession.  If  toe  confess  our  sins,  He  is  faithful  and  just 
to  forgive  us  our  sins.  If  I  feel  a  corruption  in  my  heart,  dis- 
honouring as  it  must  be  to  God,  what  am  I  to  do  ?  If  I  sit 
down  to  reason  it  away,  I  might  as  well  attempt  to  create  a 
world.  Then  what  am  I  to  do  ?  Take  it  at  once  to  Jesus  ; 
tell  Him  all  about  it ;  and  the  faith  that  carried  it  to  Jesus  will 
overcome  it  in  His  name.  Precious  faith,  with  which  we  are 
to  fight  all  our  battles,  and  overcome  in  the  name  of  Jehovah- 
Jesus.  Oh,  what  mighty  privileges  has  the  follower  of  the 
Saviour !  We  learn  to  deal  unceasingly  with  God,  and  God 
deals  unweariedly  with  us.  Let  us  aim  in  all  things  to  glorify 
Him,  for  in  a  little  while.  He  that  shall  come  will  come,  and  will 
not  tarry.  Let  us  keep  a  purified  conscience  by  constant  con- 
fession. "We  need  not  always  retire  to  do  this.  In  the  street, 
in  company,  or  anywhere,  we  can  lift  up  our  heart  to  Him ; 
and  a  thought,  a  sigh  can  reach  His  heart,  and  He  can  mani- 
fest His  forgiving  love.  I  think,  if  there  is  a  verdant  spot  in 
this  wilderness  world,  it  is  where  a  poor  believing  sinner,  with 
a  contrite  broken  heart,  sits  at  the  feet  of  Jesus.  The  sinner 
confessing — Jesus  pardoning — the  blood  applied,  and  the  con- 
science cleansed — all  guilt  removed,  and  the  redeemed  of  the 
Lord  rising  from  his  knees,  rejoicing  in  the  Lord  his  God. 
Such  have  I  often  experienced,  and  therefore  I  commend  it  to 
all  who  are  followers  of  the  Lamb.  We  have  had  trials  of 
sickness ;  but  the  Lord  often  tries  the  faith  of  His  saints,  that 
they  may  try  His  faithfulness  in  the  fulfilment  of  His  promise. 
He  is  ever  with  them  in  all  their  troubles,  and  in  all  their  con- 
cerns He  is  equally  concerned.  When  we  depart  from  Him 
He  chastens,  but  does  not  lose  sight  of  us,  no,  not  for  an  in- 
stant. His  glory  is  closely  connected  with  all  Ave  say  and  all 
we  do.  Know  ye  not  that  your  bodies  are  the  tetnj^les  of  the 
Holy  Ghost  ?  Oh,  how  should  this  keep  us  watchful,  lest  we 
grieve  this  blessed  Inmate !  The  Lord  bless  you  and  increase 
you  in  all  spiritual  knowledge,  prays  yours  in  a  most  precious 
Jesus." 


LETTER   TO   HER   SOX.  223 

It  is  a  lesson  which  the  church  of  Christ,  in  "these  last 
days,"  has  been  practically  learning,  that  the  broadest  spirit  of 
Christian  charity  may  exist  in  connexion  with  the  most  inflexi- 
ble fidelity  to  Christian  truth.  A  union  that  demands,  as  a 
holocaust  upon  its  altar,  the  right  of  private  judgment,  freedom 
of  conscience,  and  the  privilege  of  '  speaking  the  truth  in  love,' 
is  w^anting  in  all  the  essential  elements  of  a  true  and  holy 
union.  No  individual  ever  maintained  more  strenuously  the 
unity  of  the  church  of  God,  and  at  the  same  time  bowed  with 
profounder  reverence  to  the  supreme  Headship  and  authority  of 
Christ,  than  the  subject  of  our  memoir.  To  those  who  knew 
her  but  partially,  she  might  have  appeared,  at  times,  exclusive 
in  her  views,  and  stern  in  her  spirit.  But  to  those  who  knew 
her  long  and  well,  that  exclusiveness  was  but  an  uncompro- 
mising attachment  to  God's  word,  and  that  sternness  but  the 
intensity  of  her  love  to  souls.  As  illustrating  these  happy  fea- 
tures of  a  truly  catholic  Christian,  we  quote  from  her  letters 
and  journal : — 


TO  HER  SON,   REV.  I.  D.  W . 

"I  have  just  had  a  sweet  visit  from  my  own  dear  pastor  Mr. 
Evans.  How  full  of  Christ  is  the  heart  of  this  dear  man  of 
God  !  Oh,  that  we  were  all  more  like  him,  or  rather  more  like 
Christ.  .  .  .  Where  I  see  the  love  of  Christ  most  prevail 
in  the  heart,  there  I  see  love  to  the  saints.  Love  ye  one  another, 
even  as  I  have  loved  you.  Blessed  be  God  there  are  no  sepa- 
rating walls  in  heaven ;  and  of  this  be  assured,  wherever  you 
meet  with  one  who  bears  much  of  the  image  of  Christ,  you 
will  find  no  bigotry  or  exclusiveness,  but  a  prevailing  love  to 
all  who  are  conformed  to  the  same  image.  Let  us  beware  of 
a  spirit  of  sectarianism  and  exclusiveness,  for  sure  I  am,  God 
is  displeased  with  it,  and  will  show  His  displeasure  in  due  time. 
Let  us  live  above  all  unholy,  unrighteous  feelings,  and  have 
little  to  do  with  those  who  hold  them,  for  evil  communications 
corrupt  good  manners.  God  is  love.  Heaven  is  one  ocean  of 
love,  and  believers  are  commanded  to  love  one  another,  even 
as  Christ  hath  loved  them.  The  Spirit  does  not  love  to  dwell 
where  love  is  not  the  prevailing  feeling.  In  fact  where  the 
Spirit  is,  there  will  be  love ;  and  the  manifest  want  of  this 
grace  in  any,  is  a  proof  that  the  Spirit  of  Christ  is  not  in  them." 


224  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

TO    ANOTHER    OF    HER    SONS. 

"  If  God  will,  I  shall  come  to-morrow,  and  remain  over  the 
Lord's-day.  May  the  Lord  direct  all  my  step?,  and  all  my 
doings,  and  hedge  up  my  way  where  I  would  go  wro]ig.  I 
shall  see  you,  please  God,  soon  after  you  receive  this.  1  long 
to  hear  more  about  the  sailing  of  that  precious  ship  called  the 
'  Evangelical  Alliance.'  I  was  fearful  of  a  wreck  on  the 
slavery  question.  May  the  Lord,  the  Pilot,  conduct  her  safe- 
ly through  all  the  dangers  of  her  boisterous  voyage.  His  ban- 
ner over  her  is  Love  ;  and  her  freight  is  composed  of  precious 
gold,  and  jewels  of  the  first  water." 

On  a  subsequent  occasion  she  again  alludes  to  this  sub- 
ject:— 

"  I  rose  early,  and  after  a  hurried  breakfast,  prepared  to  go 
to  Exeter  Hall,  to  the  Meeting  of  the  Evangelical  Alliance. 
The  place  was  filled,  many  standing.  The  meeting  was  not 
of  that  animated  character  that  was  exhibited  at  the  first  gath- 
ering at  Liverpool ;  but  still  it  was  truly  gratifying  to  see  so 
many  happy  faces  assembled  together,  to  join  heart  to  heart  to 
aid  in  this  alliance  of  Christian  love  and  fellowship.  The  first 
speaker  said  a  few  words  which,  to  me,  were  anything  but  en- 
couraging. He  remarked  that  we  were  not  to  expect  much, 
or  look  for  any  great  results  at  present,  &c.  I  could  hardly 
sit  patiently,  and  listen  to  his  unbelieving  speech.  We  are  to 
ask  for,  and  expect  great  things,  from  a  great  God.  Dr.  Lief- 
child  followed,  and  spoke  well.  Then  Mr.  Bickersteth,  who 
also  spoke  much  to  the  purpose.  And  then  a  hymn,  and  a 
long,  a  very  long  prayer,  from  a  vicar.  A  Wesleyan  minister 
followed,  and  after  him  Mr.  Baptist  Noel  rose,  and  spoke  with 
great  energy,  earnestness,  and  a  clear  head,  but  without  ex- 
citement, for  above  an  hour,  and  miich  to  our  satisfaction. 
Others  were  to  speak,  but,  it  being  late,  we  were  obliged  to 
leave.  There  was,  in  my  judgment,  a  deficiency.  There 
needed  more  of  the  humble  acknowledgment  of  sin, — the  sin 
of  disunion,  want  of  love,  &c., — and  looking  to  the  Holy  Spirit 
for  help,  which  always  indicates  the  Divine  presence.  Tliere 
was  this  great  lack.  Nevertheless,  it  was  cheering  and  pleas- 
ant to  witness  the  union." 

FROM    HER    DIARY. 

"  The  love  of  Christ  in  the  heart  of  the  believer,  is  the 
cement  that  unites  the  church  together  as  one  body — Christ 


LETTER  TO    A   MINISTER.  225 

the  Head.  The  Spirit  of  Christ  in  me  recognises  and  acknowl- 
edges His  own  hkeness  in  another,  and  goes  out  to  that  Chris- 
tian in  holy  love.  This  is  the  sweetest  of  all  Christian  fellow- 
ship. It  is  thus  the  Lord  is  preparing  His  church  on  earth  for 
the  blessed  place  He  has  gone  to  prepare  for  it  in  heaven.  He 
is  spiritually  educating  and  training  her  for  her  glorious  in- 
heritance above.  It  is  ready,  and  the  invitation  from  the  lips 
of  Jesus  will  soon  be  heard,  Enter  into  the  joy  of  thy  Lord. 
And  oh,  the  unspeakable  happiness  and  joy  of  the  redeemed 
and  glorified  family  !  With  a  calling  so  heavenly,  and  with  a 
hope  so  glorious,  what  manner  of  persons  ought  we  to  be  in 
all  manner  of  holy  conversation  and  godliness?" 

"  Then  let  the  rude  tempest  assail, 
The  blasts  of  adversity  blow, 
The  haven,  thoup^h  distant,  I  hail, 
Beyond  this  rough  ocean  of  woe. 
When  safe  on  the  beautiful  strand, 
I'll  smile  at  the  billows  that  foam, 
Kind  angels  to  hail  me  to  land, 
And  Jesus  to  welcome  me  home."* 

TO    A    MINISTER ON    THE    ANTI-STATE-CHURCH    MOVEMENT. 

"  On  reading  your  excellent  remarks  on  the  Anti-state- 
Church  Association,  I  felt  a  union  with  your  conciliatory  spirit, 
and  a  sympathy  with  your  views.  With  you,  I  think,  as  I  did 
indeed  from  the  first,  that  the  movement  was  inexpedient  and 
unwise.  No  one  upon  earth,  calling  himself  a  Christian,  and  in 
reality  one,  could  more  earnestly  desire  than  myself,  the  sev- 
erance  of  the  Church  of  Christ  from  the  world ;  and  no  one 
could  more  deeply  deplore,  or  sincerely  mourn  over,  such  an 
alliance,  than  I.  The  Church  of  Christ  upheld  by  the  world, 
is  contrary  to  Christ's  express  word, —  Ye  are  not  of  the  ivorld, 
even  as  I  am  not  of  the  luorld.  My  kingdom  is  not  of  this  world. 
He  who  is  the  Head  and  Husband  of  the  Church,  surely  is 
able  to  sustain  and  guide  it  through  the  wilderness,  and  con- 
duct it  at  last  to  glory.  It  is  not  the  puny  arm  of  man  that 
can  accomplish  this  great  work.  From  the  moment  that  I  saw 
the  serpent  head  of  Popery,  under  the  disguise  of  Puseyism, 
rear  itself  in  Oxford,  from  that  moment  I  felt  that  God  Him- 
self was  about  to  accomplish  a  great  work,  and  by  this  very 
thing    at    which    all    were  alarmed  and    which    all    deplored. 

*  Miss  Taylor. 
10* 


226       MEMOm  OF  MRS.  MARY  WINSLOW. 

What  is  impossible  with  man  is  possible  with  Him.  And 
when  I  saw,  and  firmly  believed,  that  God  was  beginning  to 
purify  His  one  church,  and  with  His  fan  thoroughly  to  sift  His 
floor,  separating  the  precious  from  the  vile,  I  did  deplore  such 
an  organization ;  and  wondered  that  its  promoters  did  not  so 
discern  '  the  signs  of  the  times'  as  to  see  God's  own  hand  work- 
ing. It  appeared  to  me  like  Uzzah's  attempt  to  steady  the 
ark.  And  though  I  feared  not  like  sad  consequences  as  befel 
him,  still  the  attempt  seemed  to  me  as  unnecessary  and  feeble. 
I  fear  it  has  done  no  real  good,  and  has  but  resulted  in  widen- 
ing the  separation  already  too  much  existing  between  the  truly 
spiritual  of  God's  people  within  the  Establishment  and  those 
without  its  pale.  At  the  same  time  I  do  call  in  question  the 
motives  of  those  who  have  embarked  in  the  movement." 

TO    MISS    M.    C ,    ON    HER    BAPTISM. 

''Taplow,  Lord's-day. 
"I  do  rejoice  to  hear  that  the  Lord  is  evidently  in  your 
midst,  and  with  you,  my  young  sister,  in  a  particular  manner, 
who  has  led  you  to  acknowledge  Him  before  a  gainsaying 
world,  and  His  church  here  below.  Not  that  you  are  one  bit 
more  safe,  or  more  in  Christ  than  you  were  before  your  bap- 
tism ;  but  you  have  showed  your  love  to  Him  in  obeying  His 
sweet  command,  and  casting  away  all  confidence  in  what  you 
once  thought  would  do  quite  as  well.  You  have  now  openly 
put  on  Christ — huried  loith  Him  in  haj^tism^  ivliei'ein  you  are 
risen  luith  Him  through  the  faith  of  the  operation  of  God,  who 
hath  raised  Him  from  the  dead.  So,  beloved  one,  I  trust,  as 
in  a  figure,  you  were  baptized  in  the  likeness  of  His  death,  and 
your  death,  too,  to  the  world,  and  the  flesh,  so  you  will  be 
helped  to  go  on  your  way  rejoicing  in  Christ  Jesus.  Precious 
Jesus !  how  sweet  to  walk  with  Thee,  taking  up  every  cross 
we  meet  in  the  way.  Thy  love  making  it  light  and  pleasant. 
Oh,  to  have  faith  simply  to  follow  the  Lord  w^herever  he  sees 
fit  to  lead  us ;  to  live  for  eternity,  manifesting  that  we  are  not 
of  the  world,  even  as  He  w^as  not  of  the  world.  So  let  us 
walk  as  He  walked,  taking  His  word  only  as  our  guide  and 
directory ;  and  I  am  persuaded,  that  if  we  go  to  Jesus  and  in- 
quire of  Him  only.  He  will  make  our  path  plain  before  us,  yea, 
and  will  travel  every  step  of  that  way  with  us,  too.  We  shall 
walk  in  God's  company  when  Jesus  is  with  us,  and  we  walk 
with  Him.   .   .   .   While  T  do  wish  to  enforce  upon  all  believers 


LETTER   TO   THE    KOX.  AXD  REV.  B.  W.  N.  227 

the  great  duty  of  obeying  Jesus  in  all  He  commands,  I  do  not 
wish  to  attach  any  undue  weight  to  this  sweet  and  most  ex- 
pressive ordinance.  And  yet  I  do  think  it  is  the  duty  of  every 
believer  to  follow  Christ,  to  walk  as  He  walked;  and  in  so 
doing,  I  believe  it  will  add  much  to  his  comfort,  consolation, 
and  advance  in  the  divine  life.  May  the  Lord  lead  us  all  safe- 
ly and  uprightly  in  the  way,  and  the  glory  shall  be  to  His 
holy  name  for  ever  and  ever. 

TO  THE    HON.  AND  REV.  B,  W.  N ,   ON    UNITY  OF    JUDGMENT 

IN  THE  CHURCH  OF  CHRIST. 

".  .  .  .  I  am  informed  that  you  are  writing  a  work  on  the 
church.  .  .  .  How  important  to  remember  that  we  are  Christ's 
servants ;  that  He  hath  given  us  all  needful  direction,  and  left 
us  not  to  our  own  wisdom  in  any  one  thing  connected  with 
His  glory,  and  the  spiritual  welfare  of  His  one  church.  How 
necessary  that  in  His  church  there  should  be  unity  of  judgment 
in  what  He  has  taught  and  enjoined.  The  exhortation  is.  Be 
of  one  mind.  I  beseech  you^  hrethren,  by  the  name  of  our  Lord 
Jesus  Christy  that  ye  all  speak  the  same  thing^  and  that  there  he 
no  divisions  among  you  ;  but  that  ye  be  j^f^'ffsctly  joined  together 
in  the  same  mind  and  in  the  same  judgment^  1  Cor.  i.  10.  .  .  . 
Dear  brother  in  Jesus,  examine,  in  prayerful  attention,  the 
word  of  God.  La}^  the  case  before  the  Lord,  and  when  you 
pray,  expect  an  ansioer.  Jesus  is  the  very  same — as  full  of 
compassion,  sympathy,  gentle,  tender  love,  as  when  he  walked 
the  streets  of  Jerusalem.  Oh,  aim  to  get  his  listening  ear. 
Without  me,  He  says,  ye  can  do  nothing.  It  is  as  needful  to 
hearken  and  to  expect  an  answer,  as  it  is  to  pray.  The  Lord 
does  in  reality  bow  down  His  ear  to  what  His  child  would  say. 
J'his  j)Oor  man  cried^  and  the  Lord  heard  him.  Dear  brother, 
bear  with  an  aged  pilgrim  who  has  almost  got  home — the 
pearly  gates  in  view.  Heaven  seems  a  glorious  reality,  and  I 
shall  soon  be  there.  It  is  all  around  us.  Oh,  to  live  for  Him 
who  died  for  us,  and  in  constant  communication  with  the 
Father,  and  His  Son  Jesus  Christ.  I  am  seldom  in  town,  but 
when  I  am,  I  occupy  my  place  in  John-street,  and  have  found 
it  pleasant  to  hear  and  see  you  in  that  pulpit,  where  but  a  little 
while  ago  I  heard  my  beloved  friend  and  pastor  for  so  many 
years." 

To  an  eminent  missionary,  who,  in  his  fervent  and  somewhat 
indiscriminate  denunciations  of  slavery,  had  alluded  in  strong 


228  MEMOIR    OF   Mr^S.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

terms  to  the  system  in  the  United  States,  without  recognizing 
the  existence,  and  encouraging  the  labours,  of  those  Cliristians 
in  America  who,  amidst  obloquy,  self-denial,  and  loss,  Avere 
toiling  for  the  extinction  of  the  evil,  she  addressed  the  follow- 
ing affectionate  and  faithful  remonstrance  : — 

"  Beloved  Brother  in  Jesus, — 

"  I  rejoice  that  the  Lord  has  so  graciously  blest  your 
work  of  faith  and  labour  of  love  among  the  poor  slaves  in  the 
West  Indies ;  and  may  He  go  on  to  bless  you.  I  feel  it, 
however,  a  duty  I  owe  to  many  dear  people  of  God,  to  en- 
deavour to  correct  an  unintentional  mistake  into  which  you 
appear  to  have  fallen,  with  respect  to  slavery  in  America.  It 
is  in  the  Southern^  and  not  in  the  Northern  States,  that  slavery 
exists  ;  and  even  where  it  has  its  stronghold  it  is  yielding  to 
the  force  of  public  sentiment.  In  the  non-slave-holding  states 
there  exists  a  noble  band  of  Christians,  who  have  come  boldly 
forward  to  grapple  with  the  evil,  and  whose  labours  God  is 
blessing.  You  speak  from  hearsay,  but  I  from  personal  obser 
vation.  During  my  recent  visit  to  New  York,  the  first  anti- 
slavery  meeting  was  held  by  men  who,  in  the  fear  of  God, 
went  forth  with  their  lives  in  their  hands,  boldly  and  fearlessly 
protesting  against  the  system.  They  took  the  spoiling  of  their 
goods  joyfully;  their  dwellings  were  assailed — their  sanctuaries 
were  outraged — their  persons  were  endangered ;  but  God  up- 
held them,  and  has  so  marvellously  blest  their  efforts,  that  the 
little  band  has  become  a  great  one,  continues  to  increase,  and 
will  increase,  I  doubt  not,  until  there  exists  not  a  slave  in 
America.  These  dear  men  are  not  to  be  overlooked,  but 
acknowledged  and  affectionately  encouraged,  by  all  who  love 
the  cause  of  universal  emancipation.  I  am  personally  ac- 
quainted with  some  of  them,  and  a  witness  to  what  they 
endured  for  C'~  rist's  sake.  We,  in  this  land,  can  speak  quietly 
on  this  mattu-r,  but  it  is  quite  another  thing  to  confront  the  foe 
on  his  own  ground,  which  these  men  of  God  do.  God  bless 
them  and  uphold  their  hands,  until  they  shall  see  the  blessed 
gospel  carried  through  the  length  and  breadth  of  the  land  ;  and 
not  a  slave  in  that  highly-favoured  country  be  found  who  shall 
not,  in  all  the  glory  of  his  freedom,  both  from  the  bondage  of 
Satan  and  of  man,  stand  up  to  praise  God  for  having  inclined 
the  hearts  of  His  people  to  advocate  their  cause.  May  the 
Lord  bless  you,  and  keep  you  near  himself,  that  while  you  are 


COMMENCING   THE   DIVINE   LIFE   ARIGHT.  229 

labouring  for  the  souls  of  others,  your  own  soul  may  be  con- 
tinually refreshed  from  the  Fountain  of  living  waters,  is  the 
sincere  prayer  of,  yours  in  the  dear  Redeemer." 

TO    HER    NIECE,    MRS.    G. ,    ON    COMMENCING    THE    DIVINE 

LIFE  ARIGHT. 

"Dear  M ,  March  30. 

"  I  have  only  time  to  write  a  few  lines  in  answer  to 

your  question.     Mr.  E never  did  preach  one  thing  and  do 

another.  He  does  not  himself  baptize,  as  his  health  would 
not  admit  of  it ;  but  that  he  has  been  baptized  is  certain,  and 
your  informer  has  been  misinformed.  .  .  .  May  the  Lord 
direct  you  in  every  step  you  take  in  this  heavenward  journey. 
It  is  most  important  and  eventful.  Nothing  on  earth  can 
possibly  be  of  equal  moment  to  you  and  to  me.  Oh,  to  be 
quite  sure  that  we  are  right !  Short  may  be  our  journey,  as 
we  have  seen  by  many  dear  to  us.  They  have  passed  away, 
and  we  are  following.  The  scene  unfolding  before  us  is  grand 
— it  is  most  glorious.  The  prospect  to  me,  at  times,  is  most 
dehghtful,  and  soon  shall  I  see  Jesus,  my  best  Friend,  with 
whom  I  have  had  sweet  communion  here,  and  so  many  precious 
souls  dear  to  me,  among  the  millions  that  surround  the  throne. 
Oh,  commence  this  journey  right.  Everything  depends  upon 
a  right  beginning.  One  wrong  turn  in  setting  out,  and  all  will 
be  wrong  the  whole  of  the  way.  The  starting  point  for  the 
saint  of  God  is  the  finished  work  of  Jesus — to  know  he  is 
pardoned  and  accepted  in  the  Beloved  of  God  the  Father.  It 
is  then  he  knows  his  election  of  God,  and  can.  say,  '  I  am 
saved  ! '  He  then  can  run  the  race  with  holy  delight ;  and 
though  he  may  necessarily  have  many  enemies  to  contend  with, 
botli  from  within  and  from  without,  yet  He  who  has  once  set 
him  upon  his  feet  and  bid  him  go  forward,  will  watch  Over 
him,  by  day  and  by  night,  guide  him  and  correct  him  when 
needful,  and  assuredly  enable  him  to  hold  out  to  the  end. 
And  then  the  reward  ! — Come,  ye  blessed  of  my  Father.  I  do 
not  say  that  all  the  children  of  God  have  equally  clear  and 
distinct  evidences  of  their  sonship ;  but  I  do  say  they  ought 
to  have  it,  and  it  is  their  own  fault,  and  not  Christ's,  if  they 
have  it  not.  I  would  inquire  of  such,  Has  Christ  spoken 
peace  to  your  soul  ?  Has  He  manifested  himself  to  you, 
according  to  His  promise  ?     If  He  has  not,  do  not  rest  your- 


230  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

self,  or  gire  Him  rest,  until  you  have  that  mighty  blessing. 
It  is  for  any  poor,  needy,  seeking  sinner.  Seek  it  until  you 
receive  it,  and  be  not  satisfied  without  it.  '  Ye  shall  find  me 
wlien  ye  seek  me  with  your  whole  heart.'  Many  who,  from 
not  setting  out  aright,  have  gone  on  sickly  and  infirm  all  their 
journey,  are  never  truly  happy  in  themselves,  or  capable  of 
administering  to  the  happiness  of  others.  Jesus  Christ  is  the 
same  now  that  He  ever  was.  He  that  spoke  to  Abraham,  to 
Isaac,  and  to  Jacob — who  was  with  Moses  in  the  wilderness, 
and  with  the  Apostles  in  their  labours — who  appeared  to  Saul 
of  Tarsus,  and  to  many  others,  after  His  resurrection,  is  the 
very  same  now.  He  is  not  changed  one  bit.  He  is  as  ready 
now  to  make  Himself  known  to  His  saints,  and  to  speak  sweet 
peace  to  their  souls,  as  He  ever  w^as.  Only  believe,  and  you 
shall  see,  and  your  soul  shall  rejoice  w4th  joy  unspeakable  and 
full  of  glory.  Oh,  to  liave  the  Lord  always  with  us,  by  day 
and  by  night,  and  not  to  rest  without  we  are  sensible  of  His 
precious  presence !  Seek  for  Him  ;  for  everything  indicates 
that  His  coming  draweth  nigh.  Have  your  lamp  bright  and 
shining — plenty  of  oil  in  your  vessel." 

TO  ONE  OF  HER  SONS ON  PUBLIC  PRAYER  AND  READING. 

"  .  .  .  .1  have  often  wished  to  say  a  word  on  the 
subject  of  public  pra3'er  and  reading.  You  know  my  dislike 
to  2)reaching  in  j:)rayer  ;  and  you  also  disapprove  of  it.  And 
yet  I  think  many  ministers  are  apt  to  fall  into  the  same  evil, 
although  I  know  some  who  never  do.  Prayer  is  the  most 
holy  exercise  of  the  soul,  and  should  be  the  pure  breathings 
of  the  renewed  heart  in  humble,  earnest  petition,  as  in  the 
presence  of  a  holy  God.  And  when  the  soul  feels  in  the  pres- 
ence of  God,  and  loses  sight  of  the  worms  of  the  dust  who 
are  listening  to  Him,  there  is  no  self-seeking  or  wish  to  please 
the  ear  of  man,  but  humbly  to  get  the  blessed  ear  of  God  him- 
self. This  may  be  a  difficult  matter  at  times,  but  the  more  it 
is  tried,  the  more  the  Lord,  the  Spirit,  will  aid  the  effort.  My 
opinion  is,  that  both  prayer  and  preaching  should  be  what  the 
poorest  might  imderstand  and  feel,  and  also  meet  the  warmest 
desires  and  approbation  of  the  most  cultivated  intellect.  How 
sweet  is  the  simple,  precious  truth  just  as  the  Scriptures  give 
us !  May  the  Lord  bestow  every  gift  and  grace  of  His  Holy 
Spirit,  and  anoint  most  richly  for  His  own  work.  Again,  I 
have  observed  that  in  reading  the  Scriptures  in  public,  there  is 


ox    INTERCOURSE    WITH    GOD.  231 

frequently  this  defect.  For  instance,  the  epistles  are  often 
read  in  a  devotional  tone  of  voice.  Now,  they  are  merely 
letters  to  the  churches,  and  should  be  read  in  the  same  tone  of 
voice  as  one  would  read  a  letter,  and  not  as  if  one  were  pray- 
ing. Then,  again,  the  gospels  are  mere  narratives,  or  details 
of  the  history  of  the  church  and  the  apostles,  and  should  be 
read  in  the  same  manner  in  which  one  would  read  any  other 
history.  Some  of  the  Psalms  may  be  read  in  a  more  solemn 
and  devotional  tone  of  voice,  but  not  all.  Those  that  David 
offered  as  prayers  should  be  read  as  prayers,  but  no  others 
A  person  with  a  refined  taste  and  a  cultivated  ear  would  soon 
detect  the  inconsistencies.  I  think  a  good  reader  is  almost  as 
necessary  as  a  good  2)reacher ;  indeed,  the  one  seems  essential 
to  the  other." 

TO   HER   SON,   REV.    G.    E.    W ,   ON   INTERCOURSE   WITH   GOD. 

"  .  .  .  .  As  it  respects  what  is  generally  called 
'news,'  I  have  none  to  tell;  but  as  you  will  expect  to  hear 
from  me,  I  can  have  a  little  chat  with  you ;  for  how  strange  it 
would  be  if  a  Christian  mother  had  nothing  to  say  to  a  believ- 
ing child,  without  adverting  to  this  poor  dying  world,  while 
professing  to  be  striving  for  another  and  a  better  !  Is  there 
not  enough  in  a  precious  Jesus  to  engage  all  our  thoughts  and 
all  our  hearts?  We  love  to  talk  of  an  absent  friend  who  is 
dear  to  us  ;  and  what  friend  is  there  like  Him  ?  And  should 
He  not  be  dearer  to  us  than  the  dearest  object  on  earth? 
He  is  that  Friend  that  sticketh  closer  than  a  brother^  and  a  Brother 
born  for  adversity.  Let  us  not  for  a  moment  imagine  that 
when  things  go  smooth  with  us  here,  that  we  are  no  more  to 
see  tribulation,  that  we  shall  have  no  more  time  of  trouble. 
If  we  forget  or  neglect  Him  in  prosperity,  will  He  hear  and 
answer  us  in  adversity  ?  Oh,  let  this  base  ingratitude  be  far 
from  us.  Let  Him  be  our  chief  joy  now.  Let  us  keep  very 
near  to  Him,  and  let  no  idol  come  between  our  soul  and  our 
best,  nearest,  and  dearest  Friend.  Believe  me,  when  I  have 
passed  an  hour  in  company  with  the  worldling,  and  the  pre- 
cious Saviour  has  never  been  mentioned,  I  have  felt,  when 
upon  my  knees,  guilty  before  Him,  and  have  hid  my  face  in 
shame ;  and  more  so  still,  when  He  has  condescended  to  seol 
a  fresh  pardon  through  the  application  of  His  precious  blood, 
by  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  Oh,  how  dead  are  the 
unconverted  to  this  heavenly,  holy  intercourse  between  a  child 


232  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

of  God  and  his  Heavenly  Father !  Truly,  the  secret  of  the 
Lord  is  ivith  them  that  fear  Him.  ...  I  wish  you  had 
one  day  set  apart  at  your  own  house,  or  in  the  church,  for 
meeting  and  conversing  with  those  who  are  inquiring  their 
way  to  Zion.  Good  Mr.  does  this,  and  also  has  a  par- 
ticular service  with  the  believers  every  week,  to  know  the 
state  of  their  souls.  Be  thou  diligent  to  hnoiu  the  state  of  thy 
flock.  Take  heed^  therefore,  imto  yourselves,  and  to  all  the  flock 
over  which  the  Holy  Ghost  hath  made  you  overseer,  to  feed  the 
church  of  God,  ivhich  He  hath  purchased  with  His  oiun  hlood. 
Oh,  walk  in  the  truth,  to  the  glory  of  Him  who  will  have  you 
render  up  an  account  of  your  stewardship  at  that  great  day, 
for  which  all  other  days  were  made." 

The  reader  will  not  fail  to  have  remarked  how  strong  a  hold 
upon  her  faith  and  Christian  feelings  the  doctrine  of  our  Lord's 
resurrection  maintained.  It  might  almost  be  said  to  have 
been  the  truth  which  the  Holy  Spirit  unfolded  to  her  mind. 
She  saw,  as  w4th  the  keen  eye  of  the  acutest  theologian,  the 
intimate  and  essential  relation  of  this  single  truth  to  the  whole 
Christian  scheme.  This  one  fact  of  the  gospel  verified,  she 
knew  that  all  other  doctrines  were  true.  Her  whole  Christian 
life  was  a  constant  dealing  with  the  life  of  Jesus.  In  the 
grace  that  sanctified  her,  in  the  strength  that  supported,  and  in 
the  consolations  that  soothed  her,  she  was  a  constant  witness 
of  the  fact  that — Jesus  ivas  alive.  She  was  never  known  to 
linger  at  His  empty  grave.  Often  has  she  been  seen  to  weep 
at  His  cross,  never  at  His  tomb.  The  sufferings  of  Christ 
have  been  known  to  dissolve  her  whole  soul  into  penitence ; 
the  resurrection  of  Christ  to  fill  it  with  the  sublimest  joy. 
And  who,  with  any  spiritual  apprehension  of  this  truth,  will 
charge  her  with  exaggerating  either  its  importance  or  its  pre- 
ciousness  ?  The  resurrection  of  Christ  is  the  resurrection-life 
of  the  Christian.  A  living  Christ  dwells  in  him — a  living 
Christ  intercedes  for  him — a  hving  Christ  upholds,  guides, 
shields,  and  comforts  him;  and  when  "Christ,  toho  is  our  life, 
shall  appear,  then  we  also  shall  appear  with  Him  in  glory." 

"  I  experienced  much  comfort  and  enjoymerrt  this  morning, 
in  meditating  on  the  resurrection  of  Christ.  I  felt  that  He 
was  really  risen  ;  that  my  best  and  dearest  Friend  was  truly 
alive  and  in  heaven  for  me ;  there,  seated  at  the  right  hand 
of  God,  loving  and  watching  over  me  and  mine,  and  that  I 
was  safe  in  His  hands,  come  life,  come   death.     I  fell  upoa 


LOOKING    UNTO   TESUS.  233 

mj  knees,  and  poured  out  my  soul  in  adoring  gratitude,  praise, 
and  thanksgiving.  I  long  for  another  fresh  token  of  His  love 
in  the  conversion  of  all  dear  to  me.  I  thought  of  the  stone 
rolled  from  the  door  of  the  sepulchre,  while  Mary  was  pon- 
dering in  her  mind  how  it  could  be  accomplished.  The  Lord, 
who  can  do  all  things,  can  remove  the  stone  that  lieth  upon 
the  dead,  and  the  dead  shall  live  to  praise  and  bless  His  holy 
name." 

"  The  only  way  which  a  good  and  gracious  God  has  pointed 
out  to  us  in  the  Scriptures,  in  which  we  may  be  enabled  to  go 
on  our  heavenly  journey  is,  by  looking  unto  jesus,  not  only 
when  we  first  commence,  but  all  our  journey  through.  In 
the  first  place,  we  ought  to  be  well  assured  that  we  have  really 
and  truly  been  reconciled  to  God  through  the  precious  peace- 
speaking  blood  of  His  dear  Son.  If  we  have  sought  Him 
with  our  whole  heart,  we  have  found  Him ;  and  if  we  have 
found  Him,  we  must  know  that  all  our  sins  are  freely  forgiven 
for  His  sake.  Ye  shall  find  me  luhen  ye  seek  me  ivith  your 
whole  heart.     This  is  true,  for  God,  who  cannot  lie,  says  it." 

"LOOKING   UXTO    JESUS. 

"Wherefore  droops  thy  trembhng  soul? 

Wherefore  sadden'd  is  thy  brow  ? 
Clouds  around  thy  path  may  roll, 

But  thy  God  is  present  now. 
Raise  thine  eyes,  the  cross  is  there, 

Steadfast  still,  though  tempest  frown  ; 
Lift  up  thy  head,  and  make  tliy  prayer, 

Claim  thy  Saviour  for  thine  own ; 
Make  through  Him  thy  deep  appeal, 
LooKiN'Cr  UXTO  Jesus,  kneel. 

"  He,  the  Author  of  the  faith 

winch  thy  Spirit  sliall  renew, 
In  His  sacred  hour  of  death 

Finish'd  th}^  salvation  too. 
Learn  thy  Saviour's  power  to  see  ; 

He,  the  life,  the  truth,  the  way, 
Ints-'rceded  e'en  for  thee, 

Ere  thy  heart  had  learn'd  to  pray. 
Lift  thy  heart,  and  raise  thy  hand, 
Looking  uxto  Jesus,  stand. 

"  When  the  water-floods  of  grief 

Round  thy  helpless  head  shall  rise, 
When  there  seemeth  no  relief, 

Look  toward  the  eternal  skies : 


236  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

God  is  only  effectually  profitable  as  it  is  worked  out  by  the 
trying  providence  of  God  in  the  soul's  deep  experience.  Head- 
knowledge  will  not  do.  Hearing  with  the  outward  ear  does 
but  little  for  the  soul,  enables  it  to  make  no  headway  towards 
heaven,  or  unfolds  to  us  the  tenderness  of  Christ,  or  the  real 
character  of  God.  The  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus  is  more  known 
in  one  deep  trial  than  a  year  of  smooth  sailing.  Worldly  pros- 
perity is  but  indifferent  soil  for  the  Christian  to  grow  in.  It 
rather  stunts  the  soul ;  and  nothing  but  an  Almighty  arm  can 
save  from  the  sleep  of  death." 

Not  only  w^as  she  permitted  to  see  her  children,  but  her 
children's  children,  avowing  her  covenant  God  as  their  God 
and  Portion.  She  thus  gratefully  records  the  interesting 
event : — 

From  her  Diary. — "  The  w^ork  of  grace  in  the  family  has 

filled  our  hearts  with  wonder  and  joy.      Three  of  T 's 

children,  I  do  trust,  have  been  brought  to  surrender  their 
hearts  to  Jesus.  The  Lord  is  answering  my  prayers ;  He  has 
dropped  the  mantle  of  His  love  upon  my  grandchildren,  and 
called  them  into  His  kingdom.  The  work  in  their  hearts  is  a 
gentle  drawing  with  the  cords  of  love  to  a  Father's  reconciled 
bosom,  where,  I  trust,  their  precious  souls  will  be  screened 
from  all  the  evil  of  an  evil  world,  and  be  prepared  to  serve 
Him  here  and  hereafter.  Their  convictions  of  sin  have  not 
been  deep,  but  God  the  Spirit  works  as  a  Sovereign  in  all  He 
does ;  and  what  they  know  not  now  they  will  know  hereafter, 
as  he  leads  them  onward.  Perhaps,  if  they  knew  w^hat  a  bed 
of  impiety  lies  deeply  seated  in  their  hearts,  they  would  at 
once  sink  into  despair,  and  give  up  all  for  lost.  But  the  Lord 
will,  by  little  and  little,  make  them  acquainted  with  their  own 
hearts  in  the  same  proportion  as  they  know  His  heart.  Oh, 
how  wisely  He  acts  in  all  His  dealings  with  His  children  ! 
He  gives  no  account  of  any  of  His  matters,  but  acts  as  a  Sove- 
reign on  His  throne." 

"  In  my  private  reading  this  morning,  went  through  God's 
gracious  dealings  with  the  children  of  Israel,  in  tlie  third  chap- 
ter of  Joshua,  in  dividing  the  waters  of  Jordan,  and  taking 
them  over  in  safety  to  the  good  land  He  had  promised  to 
Moses.  Afterwards,  I  read  the  same  in  the  family,  and  found 
much  liberty  in  speaking  a  little  from  it.  It  was  sweetly  en- 
couraging to  my  own  soul ;  for  Joshua's  God  is  my  God  ;  and, 
although  I  hear  no  audible  voice  from  heaven,  I  hear  the  still 


DIARY.  237 

small  voice  of  the  Spirit  speaking  to  my  inmost  heart.  Blessed 
be  God  for  the  precious  revelations  of  His  holy  will  concerning 
us !  I  am  in  a  wilderness,  but  God  is  with  me.  I  walk  by 
faith,  and  not  by  sight.  He  is  in  all  things  concerning  me.  I 
find  it  the  hardest  thing  to  sit  still  when  in  difficulties.  My 
busy,  unbelieving  heart  is  ever  for  doing  or  undoing, — planning 
and  arranging  better  and  quicker  than  a  good  and  wise  God. 
Oh,  to  be  still  and  wait  patiently  on  God !  this  is  my  wisdom. 
I  thank  Him  for  keeping  me  from  betraying  outwardly  my 
spirit,  however  the  storm  may  have  raged  within,  and  thus 
bringing  dishonour  on  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth.  I  bless 
him  for  preventing  grace,  for  restraining  grace,  for  a  throne  of 
grace,  where  I  can  relieve  my  burdened  heart,  and  tell  Him 
all,  keeping  nothing  back,  good  or  had.  Oh,  is  not  this  a 
mighty  privilege  ?  The  God  of  Heaven,  the  Creator  of  all 
worlds,  stooping  in  love  to  simple  dust!  Had  sweet  access  to 
Him  this  morning  in  private.  His  presence  humbled  and 
melted  my  heart  with  deep  contrition.  How  I  loathe  myself, 
at  such  favoured  seasons,  in  dust  and  ashes  before  Him !" 

"Have  been  forcibly  impressed  with  the  truth,  that  the 
kingdom  of  God  comes  not  with  observation.  A  stander-by 
knows  nothing  of  what  is  passing  within  the  soul  of  the  be- 
liever— the  mighty  work  which  God  the  Spirit  is  carrying  si- 
lently on.  The  hidden  evil  is  revealed — his  soul,  in  sorrow, 
flees  to  Jesus — the  Comforter  applies  the  blood  to  the  accusing 
and  disturbed  conscience — the  throne  is  erected — the  King 
reigns  supreme — the  soul  rejoices ; — all  this  transpires  in  the 
believer  without  any  outward  sign,  and  the  world  knows  it 
not.  And  so  the  kingdom  of  God's  grace  in  the  soul  worketh 
secretly  and  silently,  and  without  observation." 

"  My  memory  fails  me Lord,  whatever  else  fails  me, 

never,  oh,  never  let  me  forget  Thee,  nor  cease  to  pray  and 
praise  while  I  have  breath  to  do  it !  Oh,  thou  blessed  and 
Eternal  Spirit,  help  my  infirmities,  and  open  both  my  heart 
and  my  mouth !  Oh,  take  of  the  things  of  Jesus,  and  show 
them  to  me,  that  I  may  be  enabled  to  ask  and  expect 
great  things  from  Thee  for  His  dear  sake  !  Lord,  teach  me  to 
pray !  I  would  sit  at  Thy  feet  as  a  httle  child  and  learn  of 
Thee.  Lord,  help  me !  Strengthen  me,  for  I  am  poor  and 
needy !  My  soul  trusteth  in  Thee ;  let  me  not  be  put  to 
shame.  Suffer  me  not  to  grieve  Thy  Holy  Spirit,  or  dis- 
honour Thee  before  the  rising  generation !     Thou  hast  prom- 


238  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

ised  never  to  leave  nor  forsake  me,  and,  even  down  to  hoar 
hairs,  to  carry  me." 

"  How  wonderful  is  God  in  all  His  great  and  gracious  deal- 
ings !  He  places  us,  as  soon  as  the  spiritual  eye  is  opened,  in 
His  school.  First,  the  infant-school ;  and  then  onward  and 
upward,  from  class  to  class,  losing  no  opportunity  of  spiritual 
instruction.  Many  hard  lessons  have  we  to  learn  and  to  re- 
learn.  But,  oh,  the  unwearied  patience  and  tenderness  of  our 
Teacher  !  Some  of  His  children  are  slow  learners,  dull  schol- 
ars, and  require  the  discipline  of  the  rod  to  stimulate  them  to 
more  earnestness,  attention,  and  submission.  Some  imagine 
they  have  arrived  at  the  end  of  their  education,  and  sit  down 
at  their  ease :  but  presently  they  are  called  upon  to  solve  some 
hard  problem,  and  they  find  that  they  know  less  than  they 
thought,  and  for  their  boasting  are  sent  back  to  a  lower  class, 
and  made  to  commence  where  they  first  began.  Such  is  the 
school  of  Christ.  Lord,  teach  me  more  and  more  of  Thyself, 
and  of  my  own  poverty,  misery,  and  weakness.  And,  oh,  un- 
fold to  my  longing  eyes  and  heart  what  there  is  in  Thyself  to 
supply  all  my  need,  and  in  Thy  loving,  willing  heart,  to  do  all 
for  me,  and  all  in  me,  to  fit  me  for  Thy  service  here,  and  for 
Thy  presence  hereafter  !  Sanctify  abundantly  all  Thy  varying 
dispensations  to  the  welfare  and  prosperity  of  my  soul,  and  in- 
crease in  me  every  gift  and  grace  of  thy  Spirit,  that  I  may 
show  forth  Thy  praise,  and  walk  humbly  and  closely  with 
Thee.  Thou  knowest  what  a  poor,  worthless  worm  I  am,  and 
how  utterly  unworthy  of  the  least  mercy  from  Thy  merciful 
hands ;  but  Thou  lovest  to  bestow  Thy  favours  upon  the  poor 
and  needy,  such  as  me,  thou  most  precious  Lord.  Thou  hast 
been  a  good  and  gracious,  sin-pardoning  God  to  my  soul,  and 
a  very  present  help  in  every  time  of  trouble.  Leave  me  not, 
nor  forsake  me,  now  that  old  age  is  overtaking  me,  and  grey 
hairs  thicken  upon  me.  I  know  Thou  wilt  not.  Thou,  who 
hast  been  with  me  all  my  journey,  wilt  not  leave  me  now ;  for 
Thou  art  faithful  that  hast  promised.  I  feel  my  dependence 
on  Thee  more  than  ever.  Without  Thee  I  can  do  nothing. 
Helpless  as  an  infant,  I  hang  upon  Thee,  to  do  all  for  me  and 
all  in  me.     Oh,  what  a  Friend  is  Christ  to  me  ! " 

"  111  in  bed  with  influenza.  The  Lord  still  gracious  and 
kind.  All  is  in  love.  No  good  thing  does  He  withhold. 
Mercy,  mercy,  mercy,  all  is  mercy.  The  bush  on  fire,  and  not 
consumed, — such  am  I.     Sin  enough  in  my  flesh  to  kindle  a 


DIARY.  239 

flame  that  never  could  be  quenched ;  but  the  Spirit  is  there  to 
overcome  ;  and  faith,  however  weak,  is  always  a  conqueror. 
Faith  honours  God,  and  God  honours  faith.  Little  faith  never 
need  to  hang  its  head  ;  it  can  do  wonders  with  God,  and  for 
God.  It  is  His  own  gift,  and  given  like  Himself,  full  and  free, 
and  it  is  ever  pointing  to  eternity. " 


CHAPTER    XI. 


*'  If  the  Lord  has  ever  honoured  me  in  any  way  by  making 
use  of  me,  it  has  been  in  comforting  the  comfortless,  or  in 
speaking  a  word  to  the  tried  and  heavy-laden ;  but  never,  to 
my  knowledge,  in  rousing  the  dead  sinner,  I  must  leave  that 
to  better  hands.  God  does  not  honour  me  much  in  that  way. 
He  fits  His  people  for  whatever  work  He  has  for  them  to  do, 
and  when  they  attempt  any  other  they  fail.  And  yet  I  do 
feel  most  anxious  for  the  conversion  of  sinners.  No  subject 
lies  so  near  my  heart,  and  for  nothing  do  I  more  earnestly 
pray."  Such  were  the  lowly  views  of  herself,  as  cherished  by 
the  subject  of  this  memorial.  And  what,  though  her  talent 
w^as  single,  and  her  mission  limited  ?  What  if  God  had  con- 
fided to  her  no  other  and  costlier  gift,  or  had  appointed  her  to 
no  higher  or  wider  sphere  than  that  of  counselling,  succouring, 
and  sympathizing  with  the  perplexed,  the  feeble,  and  the  tried 
of  His  family  ?  Surely,  it  were  a  gift  to  which  the  highest 
angel  in  heaven  might  aspire,  and  a  mission  he  might  pant  to 
discharge.  To  this  work,  for  w4nch  she  seemed  peculiarly  and 
pre-eminently  fitted,  she  was,  in  the  providence  of  God,  fre- 
quently called.  Schooled  in  adversity,  she  knew  how  to  ad- 
dress herself  to  those  who  Avere  tracing  the  dreary  path  she 
had  already  trod.  Having  drunk  deeply  of  the  cup  of  grief, 
she  could  speak  a  word  of  heart-cheer  to  those  whose  lips  were 
but  just  touching  its  brim.  Call  we  this  a  feeble  gift,  a  minor 
mission  ?  Oh,  there  is  no  distinction  like  that  of  being  a  hene- 
factor  of  MIND  ;  and  there  is  no  privilege  like  that  of  expressing 
sympathy  witli  sorrow.  But  how  little  is  the  philosophy  of 
sympathy  understood  !  How  few  regard  and  cultivate  it  as  a 
self-disciplinary  feeling,  equally  as  a  means  of  soothing  and  al- 
leviation to  others !  And  yet  there  is  scarcely  a  single  one  in 
the  class  of  our  emotional  feelings  more  peculiarly  adapted  to 
work  out  this  grand  res?ult.  "Sympathy,"  as  an  eminent  phil* 
[2401 


ON    CONSOLATION.  241 

osophical  writer  justly  remarks,  "by  bringing  us  in  contact 
with  individuals  in  various  forms  and  degrees  of  suffering,  tends 
to  withdraw  us  from  the  power  of  self-love,  and  the  deluding 
influence  of  present  things.  .  .  .  The  due  cultivation  of  the 
benevolent  affections,  therefore,  is  not  properly  to  be  considered 
as  the  object  of  moral  approbation,  but  rather  as  a  process  of 
moral  culture.  They  may  enable  us  in  some  degree  to  benefit 
others,  but  their  chief  benefit  is  to  ourselves."*  Who  cannot, 
from  experience,  testify  to  the  truth  of  this  ?  Who  that  has 
sought  to  soothe  another's  woe  has  not  found  a  balm  for  his 
own  lonely  grief  ?  Who  that  has  poured  out  his  soul  in  inter- 
cessory supplications  for  others  has  not  felt  the  prayer  he 
breathed  to  Heaven  returning  into  his  own  bosom  laden  with 
its  joy  and  peace  ?  In  a  word,  who,  in  the  indulgence  of  a 
sacred  benevolence,  and  with  a  single  eye  to  the  Divine  glory, 
has  ever  attempted  the  accomplishment  of  any  good,  has  not 
been  conscious  of  a  mental  enjoyment  the  most  exquisite,  and 
of  a  moral  discipline  the  most  salutary  ?  Such  is  the  reflex 
influence  of  true  sympathy.  It  is  now  our  privilege  to  present 
a  few  of  Mrs.  Winslow's  letters  of  Christian  consolation,  se- 
lected from  a  large  mass,  without  any  particular  regard  to 
exact  chronological  arrangement.  The  following  remarks  from 
her  Diary  may  not  be  an  inappropriate  introduction  to  these 
epistles  : — 

"  I  think,  if  the  believer  makes  any  attainment  in  the  knowl- 
edge of  God  and  of  himself,  or  any  advance  in  the  Divine  life, 
he  must  have  much  to  do  with  the  varied  and  changing  prov- 
idences of  God.  In  this  way  the  Spirit  chiefly  and  mainly 
worketh  in  him,  and  grounds  and  settles  him  in  the  truth. 
There  is  not  a  single  truth  in  God's  word  which  will  be  of  any 
avail  to  us,  but  as  it  is  wrought  out  in  the  experience  of  the 
soul,  by  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  through  the  varying 
dispensations  of  Divine  Providence.  Thus  the  Israelites  were 
led  through  many  trials  and  difficulties  in  the  wilderness,  to 
show  them  what  was  in  them.  We  are  such  obtuse  scholars ; 
and  I  often  wonder  and  wonder  again  at  the  patience  of  a 
good,  gracious,  and  unchanging  God  towards  us.  He  varies 
His  dealings,  that  He  might  teach  us  our  nothingness,  weak- 
ness, and  total  helplessness.  Faith,  too,  is  constantly  brought 
into  exercise,  and  is  thereby  increased  in  strength,  by  an  in- 

*  Abercrombie  on  the  Moral  Feelings. 
]] 


CHAPTER    XI 


*'  If  the  Lord  has  ever  honoured  me  in  any  way  by  making 
use  of  me,  it  has  been  in  comforting  the  comfortless,  or  in 
speaking  a  word  to  the  tried  and  heavy-laden ;  but  never,  to 
my  knowledge,  in  rousing  the  dead  sinner.  I  must  leave  that 
to  better  hands.  God  does  not  honour  me  much  in  that  way. 
He  fits  His  people  for  whatever  work  He  has  for  them  to  do, 
and  when  they  attempt  any  other  they  fail.  And  yet  I  do 
feel  most  anxious  for  the  conversion  of  sinners.  No  subject 
lies  so  near  my  heart,  and  for  nothing  do  I  more  earnestly 
pray."  Such  were  the  lowly  views  of  herself,  as  cherished  by 
the  subject  of  this  memorial.  And  what,  though  her  talent 
was  single,  and  her  mission  limited  ?  What  if  God  had  con- 
fided to  her  no  other  and  costlier  gift,  or  had  appointed  her  to 
no  higher  or  wider  sphere  than  that  of  counselling,  succouring, 
and  sympathizing  with  the  perplexed,  the  feeble,  and  the  tried 
of  His  family  ?  Surely,  it  were  a  gift  to  which  the  highest 
angel  in  heaven  might  aspire,  and  a  mission  he  might  pant  to 
discharge.  To  this  work,  for  which  she  seemed  pecuharly  and 
pre-eminently  fitted,  she  Avas,  in  the  providence  of  God,  fre- 
quently called.  Schooled  in  adversity,  she  knew  how  to  ad- 
dress herself  to  those  who  were  tracing  the  dreary  path  she 
had  already  trod.  Having  drunk  deeply  of  the  cup  of  grief, 
she  could  speak  a  word  of  heart-cheer  to  those  whose  lips  were 
but  just  touching  its  brim.  Call  we  this  a  feeble  gift,  a  minor 
mission  ?  Oh,  there  is  no  distinction  like  that  of  being  a  hene- 
f actor  of  MIND  ;  and  there  is  no  privilege  like  that  of  expressing 
sympathy  with  sorrow.  But  how  little  is  the  philosophy  of 
sympathy  understood  !  How  few  regard  and  cultivate  it  as  a 
self-disciplinary  feeling,  equally  as  a  means  of  soothing  and  al- 
leviation to  others !  And  yet  there  is  scarcely  a  single  one  in 
the  class  of  our  emotional  feelings  more  peculiarly  adapted  to 
work  out  this  grand  result.  "  Sympathy,"  as  an  eminent  phil- 
[240] 


ON    CONSOLATION.  241 

osophical  writer  justly  remarks,  "by  bringing  us  in  contact 
with  individuals  in  various  forms  and  degrees  of  suffering,  tends 
to  withdraw  us  from  the  power  of  self-love,  and  the  deluding 
influence  of  present  things.  .  .  .  The  due  cultivation  of  the 
benevolent  affections,  therefore,  is  not  properly  to  be  considered 
as  the  object  of  moral  approbation,  but  rather  as  a  process  of 
moral  culture.  They  may  enable  us  in  some  degree  to  benefit 
others,  but  their  chief  benefit  is  to  ourselves."*  Who  cannot, 
from  experience,  testify  to  the  truth  of  this  ?  Who  that  has 
sought  to  soothe  another's  woe  has  not  found  a  balm  for  his 
own  lonely  grief  ?  Who  that  has  poured  out  his  soul  in  inter- 
cessory supplications  for  others  has  not  felt  the  prayer  he 
breathed  to  Heaven  returning  into  his  own  bosom  laden  with 
its  joy  and  peace?  In  a  word,  who,  in  the  indulgence  of  a 
sacred  benevolence,  and  with  a  single  eye  to  the  Divine  glory, 
has  ever  attempted  the  accomplishment  of  any  good,  has  not 
been  conscious  of  a  mental  enjoyment  the  most  exquisite,  and 
of  a  moral  discipline  the  most  salutary  ?  Such  is  the  reflex 
influence  of  true  sympathy.  It  is  now  our  privilege  to  present 
a  few  of  Mrs.  Winslow's  letters  of  Christian  consolation,  se- 
lected from  a  large  mass,  without  any  particular  regard  to 
exact  chronological  arrangement.  The  following  remarks  from 
her  Diary  may  not  be  an  inappropriate  introduction  to  these 
epistles  : — 

"  I  think,  if  the  believer  makes  any  attainment  in  the  knowl- 
edge of  God  and  of  himself,  or  any  advance  in  the  Divine  life, 
he  must  have  much  to  do  with  the  varied  and  changing  prov- 
idences of  God.  In  this  way  the  Spirit  chiefly  and  mainly 
worketh  in  him,  and  grounds  and  settles  him  in  the  truth. 
There  is  not  a  single  truth  in  God's  word  which  will  be  of  any 
avail  to  us,  but  as  it  is  wrought  out  in  the  experience  of  the 
soul,  by  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  through  the  varying 
dispensations  of  Divine  Providence.  Thus  the  Israelites  were 
led  through  many  trials  and  difficulties  in  the  wilderness,  to 
show  them  what  was  in  them.  We  are  such  obtuse  scholars ; 
and  I  often  wonder  and  wonder  again  at  the  patience  of  a 
good,  gracious,  and  unchanging  God  towards  us.  He  varies 
His  dealings,  that  He  might  teach  us  our  nothingness,  weak- 
ness, and  total  helplessness.  Faith,  too,  is  constantly  brought 
into  exercise,  and  is  thereby  increased  in  strength,  by  an  in- 

*  Abercrombie  on  the  Moral  Feelings. 
11 


242  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

creasing  knowledge  of  God's  veracity,  power,  and  love.  We 
often  pray,  Lord^  increase  our  faith.  The  Lord,  in  answering 
this  prayer,  places  us  in  such  circumstances  as  call  it  forth. 
The  little  we  have  (and  we  often  find  we  have  much  less  than 
we  thought  we  had)  is  to  set  to  work  with  God,  with  whom 
alone  faith  has  to  do.  Providences,  adverse  and  painful,  stir 
up  to  cry  mightily  unto  God.  Then  come  in  the  promises. 
These  become  unspeakably  precious.  Faith  takes  them,  as  so 
many  promissory  notes,  to  the  great  Promiser  for  acceptance. 
Faith  takes  them,  as  so  many  promissory  notes,  to  the  great 
Promiser  for  acceptance.  Faith  knocks  and  waits,  knocks  and 
waits  again  ;  thus  is  it  exercised  and  increased.  Presently  the 
hand,  the  helping  hand,  is  held  out,  and  deliverance  comes, 
and  God,  the  mighty  Deliverer,  is  seen.  Then  we  say,  The 
Lord  is  my  helper  ;  I  luill  not  fear  what  man  can  do  unto  me. 
All  our  journey  through,  from  first  to  last,  the  great  work  of 
preparation  for  usefulness  in  His  service  here,  and  for  the  rich 
enjoyment  of  His  presence  in  glory,  is  thus  carrying  on  in  the 
soul  of  the  believer.  When  his  spiritual  education  is  finished, 
he  is  at  once  put  in  possession  of  the  inheritance  prepared  for 
him  from  before  the  foundation  of  the  world.  Oh,  what  a  God 
is  ours !  Who  is  like  Him  in  wisdom  and  goodness,  mercy 
and  truth  ?" 

To  a  beloved  friend,  endeared  by  a  long  and  tried  friend- 
ship, she  thus  writes,  in  a  season  of  anxiety :  — 

"Beloved  in  the  Lord  Jesus, — 

"  I  remember  you  in  my  poor  prayers,  and  do  trust 
the  Lord  will  be  with  you,  giving  all  needful  grace,  wisdom, 
and  above  all,  precious  faith,  to  cast  your  burden  upon  Him, 
and  from  whom  cometh  all  our  help.  Is  He  not  a  present  help 
in  time  of  trouble  ?  He  w411  carry  you  through  your  labour 
of  love,  for  His  name's  sake,  and  give  you  to  acknowledge, 
that  as  your  day,  so  was  your  strength.  Has  He  not  given 
you  a  work  to  do  for  Him,  and  will  He  not  fit  you  for  the 
work,  seeing  His  own  glory  is  connected  with  it  ?  Fear  not, 
then ;  Jesus  is  with  you  and  me.  He  has  laid  by  one  upon 
whom,  perhaps,  you  depended  too  much,  to  show  you  how 
easily  and  blessedly  He  can  work  by  whatever  instruments  He 
chooses  to  employ.  We  are  so  prone  to  look  to  the  creature ; 
and  then  He  takes  our  prop  away,  that  we  may  lean  upon 
Him  and   upon  Him  only.   .  .  .  Now,  beloved  sister,   be  of 


LETTERS   OF   CHRISTIAN   SYMPATHY.  243 

good  courage.  God  is  with  you,  Christ  is  with  you,  the  Holy 
Ghost  is  with  you,  and  all  the  host  of  heaven  are  with  you, 
and  you  need  not  fear.  Be  not  over-anxious.  There  is  an 
anxiety  that  borders  on  unbelief.  Get  rid  of  that,  and  believe 
that  Jesus  is  really  with  you  in  all  you  have  to  do  for  the 
spiritual  welfare  of  those  dear  children.     I  grieve  for  dear 

Mr. .     May  the  trial  be  abundantly  sanctified  to  him.     If 

he  is  to  be  useful,  he  must  have  trials ;  and,  perhaps,  God  is 
teaching  him  some  precious  truth  from  soul-experience,  for 
which  he  will  have  to  praise  and  bless  Him  throughout 
eternity.  He  does  nothing  in  vain  towards  His  own  people, 
for  He  loves  them  too  well  to  afflict  them  for  nought.  I  shall 
continue  to  remember  you  all ;  and  do  not  forget  your  sister 
in  the  tribulation  and  kingdom  of  Jesus  Christ,  for  I  truly  need 
your  prayers. 

TO  MISS  L.  0 ,  ON  THE  DEATH  OF  HER  MOTHER. 

"  My  dear  YOUNG  Friend, —  October  28th,  1851. 

"  I  have  been  longing  to  write  to  you ;  but  although 
I  have  not  done  so  yet,  you  and  your  dear  sisters  have  been 
much  in  my  heart  and  in  my  thoughts.  The  Lord  has  taken 
from  you  your  dear  mother,  I  humbly  hope  to  His  own  loving 
self.  If  so,  you  will  meet  her  again ;  and  oh,  what  a  meeting 
will  that  be  !  What  a  gathering !  Your  dear  mother  is  now 
beyond  all  care  and  anxiety,  hushed  to  peace  in  the  bosom  of 
Jesus,  the  Saviour  of  sinners.  Think  of  her  as  she  now  is. 
She  has  seen  the  Lord.  What  a  change,  from  a  bed  of  weari- 
ness and  a  body  of  suffering,  to  be  in  an  instant  in  the  presence 
and  within  the  arms  of  Christ !  Oh,  let  it  be  our  aim,  our 
chief  business,  and  the  desire  of  our  souls,  to  walk  humbly  and 
closely  with  God !  In  a  little  while  and  we  pass  away  ;  and 
oh,  how  we  shall  wonder  at  ourselves  that  we  could  have  suf- 
fered any  one  thing  to  divert  our  minds,  even  for  a  moment, 
from  the  great,  the  overwhelming  concerns  of  eternity!  .  .  . 
And  now  you  are  cast,  in  an  especial  manner,  on  the  all-pro- 
tecting care  and  love  of  Jesus  Himself,  who  will  be  both  a 
Father  and  a  Mother  to  you  all.     I  often  think  of  the  last 

interview  I  had  with  your  dear  mother.  Lady  0 ,  when 

she  called  upon  me  at  Brighton.  How  little  did  I  then  think 
I  should  see  her  no  more  on  earth !  She  looked  so  well,  and 
was  in  such  good  spirits.  Now  she  is  wdth  Jesus.  Oh,  the 
infinite  comnassion  of  the  Lord !     A  look,  a  desire,  a  sigh  He 


244  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY   WINSLOW. 

will  acknowledge.  Great  faith  will  bring  great  comfort  into 
the  soul,  but  little  faith  can  get  to  heaven.  If  no  more  than 
as  a  grain  of  mustard-seed,  it  will  land  the  soul  safely  there. 
Blessed  be  God  for  all  His  great,  rich,  and  precious  promises. 
They  are  all  like  Himself.  And  now,  beloved  friend,  it  is  the 
will  of  God  that  you  should  look  to  Him,  and  to  Him  only. 
He  is  a  Father  to  the  fatherless.  Whatever  your  care  or 
trouble  may  be,  take  it  at  once  to  Jesus.  Your  present  position 
is  an  enviable  one ;  for,  if  God  be  for  you,  who  can  be  against 
you  ?  Were  your  dear  father  and  mother  still  with  you,  what 
could  they  do  for  you  more  than  God  Himself  can  do  ?" 

TO    THE    SAME. 

"January  10th. — I  am  longing  to  hear  how  the  Lord  your 
God  and  Father  is  dealing  with  you.  You  are  peculiarly  His 
own.  When  father  and  mother  go,  then  the  Lord  will  take 
you  up,  and  carry  you  in  His  loving  fatherly  arms,  care  for, 
and  lead  you  through  this  wilderness ;  so  that  you  have  noth- 
ing to  fear,  and  nothing  to  do  but  to  trust  in  the  Lord  with  all 

your  heart.     Has  your  brother  E arrived  ?  and  how  is 

he  ?  I  feel  deeply  interested  in  you  all,  since  your  trying  and 
heavy  loss.  Your  orphan  state,  at  present,  is  one  of  peculiar 
and  tender  interest.  May  the  Lord  enable  you  to  take  a  fresh 
hold  of  Him,  and  he  will  prove  Himself  better  than  ten  par- 
ents. Why  has  he  dealt  thus  with  you  ?  To  bring  you  to  a 
better  acquaintance  with  Himself,  that  you  might  know  more 
of  that  loving,  faithful  heart,  that  says,  I  will  never  leave  thee 
nor  forsake  thee.  I  would  not  have  been  without  my  sad  trials 
for  ten  thousand  worlds.  What  should  I  have  known,  the 
little  I  do  know,  of  His  wondrous,  tender,  and  imchanging 
love,  but  for  them  ?  The  Lord  bless  you  and  your  dear  sis- 
ters, and  keep  them  in  the  hollow  of  His  hand,  and  bring  them 
to  His  heavenly  kingdom.  And  oh,  what  a  meeting  we  shall 
have  in  heaven !  This  is  but  a  wilderness,  and,  like  the  chil- 
dren of  Israel,  we  must  pass  through  it  to  reach  our  heavenly 
home.  Live  much  in  holy  contemplation  of  the  glory  that  awaits 
you.  This  will  enable  you  to  bear  the  bitter  trials  that  daily 
cross  your  path.  Carry  all  your  difficulties,  small  and  great, 
at  once  to  Jesus.  His  ear  is  open  to  your  requests,  and  He 
will  make  every  crooked  path  straight,  and  rough  path  smooth. 
We  are  on  a  journey,  and  how  soon  it  terminates  !  But,  oh, 
how  awfully  blind  are  many  who  call  themselves  Christians ! 


LETTERS    OF    CHRISTIAN   SYMPATHY.  245 

Religious  formalism  is  the  bane  of  thousands.  They  say 
prayers — but  never  pray.  They  know  nothing  of  the  great 
change  from  nature  to  grace — nothing  of  the  new  birth.  They 
have  no  personal,  spiritual  acquaintance  with  Christ ;  nothing  of 
real  conversion.  Is  it  not  melancholy  to  see  so  many  whom 
we  love,  yet  living  in  the  gall  of  bitterness  and  in  the  bond  of 
iniquity,  while  we  know  that  dying  in  that  state  they  are  lost 
for  ever  ?     Oh,  let  us  pray  for  them,  who  know  not  to  pray 

for  themselves.     My  love  to  Mrs.  F ;  to  your  aunts  at 

Brighton.  I  love  all  who  love  Christ.  Also,  your  brothers 
and  sisters.  They  are  one  family.  Oh,  to  be  a  whole  family 
in  heaven !     Let  me  hear  from  you." 

TO    MRS.    F ,   ON    THE    ILLNESS    OF    HER    HUSBAND. 

"  Beloved  Friend, —  January  26th,  1852. 

"I  hear  your  dear  husband  is  ill.  May  the  Lord  heal 
and  comfort  him.  May  he  have  the  enjoyment  of  His  mani- 
fested presence.  Satan  will  try  hard  to  harass  him,  but  Jesus 
is  near.  His  darling  attribute  is  mercy — mercy  to  the  chief 
of  sinners  is  the  delight  of  His  soul.  Call  ujDon  me  in  the  day 
of  trouble^  and  I  will  deliver  thee,  and  thou  shalt  glorify  me. 
Look  unto  me,  and  he  ye  saued.  This  same  Jesus,  tell  your 
husband,  is  waiting  to  be  gracious  to  him.  He  listens  to  hear 
his  voice.  I  trust  he  is  resting  alone  in  Him.  Tell  him  not 
to  look  within  for  evidence,  but  to  look  direct  to  Jesus  only. 
He  is  just  the  same  that  He  was  when  He  trod  the  streets  of 
Jerusalem.  Was  He  ever  known  to  reject  any  who  came  to 
Him  ?  It  is  not  in  the  heart  of  Jesus  to  turn  away  from  the 
vilest  who  call  upon  Him.  It  is  sinners  He  came  to  save,  not 
saints,  and  as  sinners  we  must  come.  I  trust  the  Lord  will 
comfort  you  in  your  present  trial.  May  He  manifest  Himself 
to  your  dear  husband !  I  enclose  for  you  the  '  Untrodden 
Path.'  " 

TO  THE  SAME ON  THE  DEATH  OF  HER  HUSBAND. 

"  I  only  heard  of  your  loss  yesterday.  The  Lord  has  taken 
your  dear  husband  from  the  evil  to  come,  and  in  a  Httle  while 
you  shall  meet  him  again.  May  He  comfort  your  sorrowing 
heart  with  a  blessed  realization  of  that  glorious  truth.  Them 
also  luhich  sleep  in  Jesus  ivill  God  bring  with  Him.  And  should 
He  call  us  away  before  He  comes,  we  shall  still  meet  them  in 
glory,  and  join  our  shouts  of  praise  with  theirs.     In  the  mean- 


246  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WTNSLOW. 

time,  beloved  friend,  you  are  the  object  of  His  especial  care, 
as  His  endeared  child.  You  have  a  double  claim  on  Jesus 
now,  who  is  the  liusband  to  the  widoiu.  Gro  to  Him  with  all 
your  fears,  your  difficulties,  your  pressures,  whatever  they  may 
be ;  great  or  small,  real  or  imaginary.  His  loving  ear  will  be 
ever  open  to  listen  to  your  voice.  Your  oneness  with  Jesus 
makes  your  cares  His  cares,  your  concerns  His  concerns.  He 
will  deny  you  nothing  that  will  be  for  your  good  or  comfort. 
This  will  make  the  little  space  left  us  on  earth  less  irksome ; 
and  constant  communion  with  this  precious  Friend  will  tend 
to  conform  us  to  His  image.  Let  me  hear  how  the  Lord  dealt 
with  your  dear  departed,  and  how  He  is  dealing  with  your 
bereaved  heart.  Oh,  what  an  honour  put  upon  us,  to  have 
Christ  as  our  Husband;  and  now  that  He  has  written  you  a 
widow,  this  is  what  He  is  to  you  and  to  me." 

TO  MRS.  E B ,  ON  THE  DEATH  OF  HER  CHILD. 

"  My  DEAR  YOUNG  FrIEND, 

"I  see,  by  the  papers,  the  Lord  has  been  pleased  again 
to  try  you  in  removing,  or  shall  I  not  rather  say,  in  housing, 
another  of  your  little  ones  ;  it  is  gone  to  join  the  host  of  those 
already  there.  ^  0/  such,'  says  Christ,  '^s  the  kingdom  of 
heaven.''  This  has  been,  no  doubt,  a  severe  trial,  and  your 
affectionate  heart  has  deeply  felt  it,  as  well  as  your  dear  hus- 
band. But  as  there  is  nothing  that  can  take  place  towards  a 
child  of  Gi-od  but  what  our  Heavenly  Father  designs,  in  infinite 
love,  for  our  spiritual  advancement,  which  is  closely  connected 
with  His  own  glory,  we  are  to  submit  to  His  holy  will,  and 
believe  that  there  was  a  needs-be  for  it.  The  Lord  loves  His 
children  too  well  to  lay  upon  them  the  weight  of  a  feather, 
without  an  absolute  necessity.  I  hope  you  have  been  enabled 
to  say,  Not  my  will,  hut  Thine  he  done.  Perhaps,  in  this  afflic- 
tion, you  have  felt  it  hard  in  God  to  deal  thus  with  you ;  and 
the  enemy  may  have  suggested  that  God  could  not  love  you, 
or  He  would  not  so  afflict  you.  Now,  the  reverse  is  the  case. 
The  Lord  chastens  those  whom  He  loves;  and  were  we 
without  chastisement,  we  might  well  doubt  our  sonship. 
Your  little  ones  are  not  lost,  but  have  only  preceded  you  to 
glory.  They  are  taken  from  the  evil  to  come.  The  Lord 
loved  them  better  than  you  could  do,  or  He  would  not  have 
reheved  them  so  soon  from  all  the  ills  and  temptations  of  this 
poor,  wicked  world.     A  time  of  affliction  should  be  a  search- 


LETTERS   OF    CHRISTIAN   SYMPATHY.  247 

ing  time  with  our  liearts.  "We  should  see  how  matters  stand 
between  our  souls  and  a  heart-trying  God,  He  is  jealous  of 
our  love.  Pie  will  occupy  the  first  place.  And  if,  upon  in- 
vestigation, we  find  tliat  the  world  or  the  creature  has  displaced 
the  Saviour  from  our  affections,  what,  then,  have  we  to  do  ? 
Only  to  acknowledge  our  iniquity,  returning  to  Him  who  is 
willing  to  receive  our  confession,  and  to  pardon  our  sin  .... 
May  He  comfort  your  heart  and  bless  your  soul." 

TO  MRS.   C ,   ox  HER  ILLNESS. 

"  My  dear  Friend, —  September  2nd,  1852. 

"  I  was  glad  to  see  your  handwriting  to-da}^,  but  how  sorry 
[  was  to  hear  you  continue  so  tried  in  body !  Surely  the 
Lord  loves  you  too  well  to  lay  the  weight  of  a  feather  upon 
you,  were  it  not  for  some  wise  and  loving  purpose  He  has  in 
view  preparing  you  for  the  full  enjoyment  of  the  glory  He  has 
gone  to  prepare  for  you.  Think  of  this  wlien  resting  your 
afflicted  body, — Jesus  had  no  bed  on  Avhich  to  rest — no  voice 
to  speak  a  word  of  kindness ;  persecuted  and  reviled,  He 
sought  the  dark  and  dreary  mountain,  and  there  He  rested. 
He  was  then  paying  our  debt  of  sin  to  Divine  Justice,  and  He 

paid  it  to  the  last  mite God,  even  our  own 

God,  deals  wisely  and  graciously  with  us  in  all  His  varying 
dispensations.  God  is  love,  and  no  one  that  knows  Him  can 
doubt  it  for  a  moment.  If  tears  could  be  shed  in  heaven,  we 
should  weep  that  we  ever  mistrusted  His  goodness  in  His 
dealings  towards  us.  Let  us,  in  this  world  of  trial,  cling  close 
to  Him,  and  lean  more  upon  Him  as  little  helpless  children. 
Keep  a  constant  intercourse  with  Him.  Tell  Him  all  you  feel, 
or  wish  or  want.     Christ  and  you  are  one.     We  are  bone  of 

His  bone,  and  flesh  of  His  flesh May  the  Lord's 

richest  blessings  rest  upon  you." 

TO  THE  SAME, ON  THE  DEATH  OF  HER  SISTER. 

"  You  have  been  in  trouble,  and  I  knew  it  not  until  last 
evening.  And  has  the  Lord  at  last  appeared  for  His  suffering 
child  ?  Has  He  taken  her  out  of  all  her  troubles,  to  lier  hap- 
py, happy  home  ?  Long  had  she  been  refining  in  the  furnace, 
and  preparing  for  that  place  Jesus  had  gone  to  take  possession 
of  for  her.  Not  one  pain  did  she  suffer,  or  sorrow  did  sh^ 
feel,  but  had  in  it  the  tenderest  love  of  Jesus,  All  was  need- 
ful.    He  was  preparing  her  for  the  full  enjoyment  of  His  pres- 


248  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

ence.  Shall  not  the  Judge  of  all  the  earth  do  right?  I  wish 
her  joy.  She  has  made  her  escape  from  a  world  of  sin  and 
trouble,  and  from  a  body,  not  only  of  sin  and  death,  but  of 
suffering,  and  long  a  clog  to  her  soul.  She  has  broken  loose 
from  her  cage,  and  is  with  Jesus.  Oh,  the  happiness  to  look 
upon  Him — to  behold  Him  in  all  His  unveiled  beauties — to 
see  Him  face  to  face  !  I  rejoice  that  she  is  at  last  released. 
1  feel  heaven  is  very  near.     Oh,  to  be  ready,  quite  ready ! 

The  recognition  of  the  saints  in  glory  is  a  sweet 
thought.  Shall  we  know  Abraham,  Isaac,  and  Jacob,  and 
not  know  those  with  whom  we  have  had  sweet  fellowship  on 
earth  ?  Surely  we  shall ;  and  one  of  the  delightful  employ- 
ments of  heaven  will  be,  to  trace  back  the  way  the  Lord  led 
us  safely,  in  spite  of  ourselves,  through  the  wilderness  world ; 
and  then  shall  we  see  how  needful  was  every  cross,  and  trial, 
and  pain,  and  dispensation,  with  which  our  precious  Jesus  saw 
fit  to  exercise  us.  And  we  shall  meet  w^here  all  differences  of 
sentiment  will  be  for  ever  done  away,  and  w^e  shall  see  eye  to 
eye,  and  Christ  w^ill  be  all  in  all  to  our  unhappy  souls.  Let 
us  try  to  be  more  like  Christ,  and  less  like  ourselves.  May 
the  Lord  bless  you,  and  comfort  your  heart,  and  the  heart  of 
the  bereaved  widower,*  and  the  motherless  children,  is  my 
earnest  prayer." 

TO  MRS.  C ,  AT  A  TIME  OF  DEEP  AFFLICTION. 

"  Dear  sister  in  Jesus, —  Leamington,  May  9th. 

"My  dear  son  has  permitted  me  to  see  your  mournful  let 
ter;  and  having  myself  passed  through  the  dark  waters  of 
tribulation,  I  thought  I  would  drop  you  a  line,  to  encourage 
your  heart  in  the  Lord.  When  we  recollect  that  Jesus  and 
His  saints  are  one — I  in  you  and  you  in  me — that  this  blessed 
union  is  eternal,  and  can  never  be  dissolved ;  then  is  He  in  all 
our  afflictions  and  trials,  great  and  small.  Nothing  can  take 
place  towards  us  but  is  especially  designed  for  our  advance- 
ment in  the  Divine  life.  He  has  now  placed  you  in  just  that 
position  to  prove  His  faithfulness  and  love.  Watch  His  tender 
dealings  towards  you,  and  see  if  He  does  not  prove  to  you  that 
He  is  better  than  ten  husbands,  or  ten  thousand  friends.     He 

*  The  late  Venerable  Archdeacon  Hodson,  one  of  the  brightest  lights 
of  the  Church  of  England,  eminent  for  his  sound  theological  views,  as 
for  his  earnest  piety.  He  died  recently,  while  making  the  tour  of  {ho 
Continent. 


LETTERS   OF   CHRISTIAN   SYMPATHY.  249 

wants  you  to  be  better  acquainted  with  Himself — to  know 
Him  more  personally.  He  wants  you  to  have  more  to  do  with 
Him,  that  you  may  understand  more  of  His  real  character, 
both  as  to  His  divine  and  human  natures.  These  are  stately 
steppings  Jesus  is  now  taking  with  your  soul.  He  says  to  you, 
*  Now  come  nearer  to  me,  My  child ;  look  more  into  My  lov- 
ing heart — see  your  name  written  there  never  to  be  effaced. 
Fear  not.  I  will  never  leave  thee,  for  we  are  owe.'  You 
have  hitherto  loved  Christ  for  saving  your  soul;  now  He 
would  have  you  love  Him  for  what  He  is  in  Himself.  How 
can  this  be,  unless  you  are  brought  into  closer  contact  with 
Him  ?  He  has  taken  your  husband,  to  place  Himself  in  the 
same  position.  He  wants  you  to  live  a  life  of  sweet,  holy 
dependence  upon  Him  as  your  Husband,  Friend,  Provider, 
Care-Taker,  Benefactor.  He  designs  to  be  all  to  you  and 
yours,  a  Father  to  the  fatherless,  and  the  widow's  God.  Be- 
loved, you  are  highly  honoured  of  God ;  you  are  now  in  a 
position  to  live  a  life  of  faith  on  the  Son  of  God, — the  hap- 
piest, the  holiest  life  a  mortal  can  enjoy  in  this  world.  You 
have  now  a  twofold  claim  upon  God,  as  His  adopted  and  His 
widowed  child.  Take  Him  now  as  one  who  has  engaged  to 
provide  for  all  your  wants,  and  the  wants  of  your  children. 
Go  to  him  for  all  you  need — not  first  to  the  creature,  but  to 
Jesus  at  once.  If  we  honour  the  creature  more  than  we  hon- 
our Christ,  we  must  expect  He  will  suffer  us  to  be  disappoint- 
ed. Tell  all  to  Jesus ;  keep  nothing  back  from  Him.  Only 
trust  Him  fully.  Honour  Him  with  your  entire  confidence. 
"We  live  at  too  great  a  distance  from  Christ.  He  wants  us  to 
experience  more  of  His  sympathy,  His  boundless  love.  His 
nearness  to,  and  His  oneness  with  us.  Forgive  me  if  I  have 
presumed  in  giving  this  advice  to  one  whom  I  only  know 
through  her  sweet  letter,  I  am  an  aged  pilgrim,  who  has 
travelled  this  thorny  road  before  you.  I  may  be  permitted  to 
speak  a  word  for  Jesus  to  one  who,  in  some  measure,  is  travel- 
ling the  same.  May  the  Lord  make  these  few  hints  a  little 
help  to  you  in  your  pilgrimage. 

to  miss  l.  o ,  in  behalf  of  a  distressed  clergyman. 

"Dear  young  Friend, — 

"  You  will,  perliaps,  call  to  mind  the  circumstance  of  the 
ilev.  Mr. ,  the  clergyman,  who  has  fallen  into  very  dis- 
tressed and  trying  circumstances.     His  health  prevents  him 
11* 


250  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW. 

from  labouring  as  he  could  wish,  and  his  family  is  large.  I 
wrote  to  dear  Mr.  Noel,  and  he  has  sent  me  a  httle  help ;  and 
now  I  must  remind  you  of  your  promise  to  do  what  you  can  for 
this  dear  afflicted  servant  of  God.  Inasmuch  as  ye  have  done 
it  unto  one  of  the  least  of  these^  my  hrethren,  ye  have  done  it  unto 
Me.     Do  you  remember  James  Montgomery's  '  Stranger  and 

his  Friend,'  which  S.  C used  to  play  with  so  much  feeling, 

and  which  always  brought  Jesus,  precious,  compassionate  Jesus, 
present  to  my  mind  ?     A  verse  will  remind  you  of  it : — 

'A  poor  wayfaring  man  of  grief 
Has  often  crossed  me  in  my  way, 
And  sued  so  humbly  for  relief, 
That  I  could  never  answer,  Nay. 

'  I  had  not  power  to  ask  his  name, 
Whither  he  went,  or  whence  he  came  ; 
Yet  there  was  something  in  his  eye 
That  won  my  heart,  I  knew  not  why.* 

I  must  send  you  the  music.     Your  dear  sister,  M ,  will 

sing  it  with  effect.  Now,  will  you  endeavour  among  your 
friends  to  assist  this  dear  man  ?  See  Christ  in  His  servant, 
believe  and  feel  that  you  are  doing  it /or  Him.  Return  me 
the  enclosed  letters,  and  what  your  hand  findeth  to  do,  do  it 
quickly^  as  I  must  hasten  to  send  him  all  the  aid  I  can.     Dear 

has  commenced   a  course  of  sermons  on  the  Creation. 

The  one  last  Lord's  Day  evening  was  on  Genesis  i.  2  :  And 
the  earth  was  without  form^  &c.  The  sweetest  part  was  the 
Spirit  of  God  moving  upon  the  face  of  the  waters — figurative 
of  the  Spirit  hovering  over  the  dark,  chaotic  soul  of  man. 
The  lecture  was  listened  to  with  breathless  silence,  and,  I  hope, 
was  blessed  to  many  a  dark,  unconverted  soul  present.  Be 
not  long  in  answering  this,  as  I  shall  wait  impatiently  until 
some  help  be  sent.  I  am  informed  they  are  really  suffering 
from  want.     My  Christian  love  to  all  your  circle." 

TO  HER  SON,  ON  THE  DEATH  OF  A  CHILD. 

"The  Lord  has  mercifully  housed  our  dear  little  sufferer; 
has  taken  it  to  His  garden  of  perfume  above.  It  was  so  ap- 
pointed by  Infinite  wisdom.  I  trust  you  will  see  it  so.  If 
the  utmost  tenderness  and  love  could  have  saved  her,  she 
would  have  been  saved,  .  .  .  She  is  not  lost ;  she  is  in  the 
tender  bosom  of  Jesus ;  and  this  was  designed  from  eternity. 


LETTERS   OF    CHRISTIAN  SYMPATHY.  251 

May  your  hearts  be  comforted,  and  you  be  enabled  to  say, 
'  The  Lord  gave^  and  the  Lord  hath  taken  away  ;  blessed  he  the 
name  of  the  Lord.''  " 

TO   MRS.  G. ,  ON  THE  DEATH  OF  HER  HUSBAND. 

"DearC ,  May  1849. 

"  I  loved  your  precious  mother,  and  now  that  you  are 
in  trouble,  my  heart  turns  to  you  in  this  your  hour  of  deep 
sorrow.  God  had  need  of  your  dear  partner,  and  has  sent  for 
him  home.  He  only  lent  him  for  a  season  ;  and  now  look  at 
him  where  he  is.  Would  he,  if  he  could,  return  to  this  poor, 
wicked  world,  and  again  take  up  that  body  of  sin,  and  of 
suffering,  and  of  death?  Think  of  him  as  a  pure  spirit  in  the 
presence  of  God,  at  the  feet  of  Jesus,  mingling  with  that  holy, 
goodly  company,  your  dear  sainted  mother  among  them,  around 
the  throne.  Much  as  he  loved  you,  would  he  return  ?  And 
now,  dear  C ,  fulfil  your  mission  ;  let  your  heart  be  com- 
forted, and  say  to  the  Lord,  *  Here  am  I ;  what  wilt  thou  have 
me  to  do?  Be  assured  He  will  comfort  and  soothe  your  widowed 
heart,  and  enable  you  to  give  it  all  to  Him.  He  is  a  jealous 
God,  and  covets  the  whole  heart,  and  well  does  He  deserve  it. 
Your  dear  husband  never  did  for  you  what  Jesus  did.  He 
paid  the  full  penalty  due  for  all  your  sins,  and  now  claims  you 
for  His  own.  But  still  you  have  your  work  assigned  you. 
These  little  ones  are  given  you  to  bring  up  for  God.  I  would 
comfort  you  with  the  comfort  with  which  I  myself  have  been 
comforted  of  God.  .  .  .  And  now  only  have  I  spoken  of  my- 
self, but  to  lead  your  bleeding  heart  to  the  same  rich  source  of 
consolation.  God  is  love,  an  ocean  of  love,  nothing  but  love. 
His  tender,  loving  eye  is  upon  you,  and  His  loving  heart  is 
towards  you  at  this  moment.  Ask  what  ye  will  and  it  shall 
he  done  unto  you.  See  what  a  God  and  Father  He  is.  He  has 
given  you  a  work  for  Him ;  and  soon  we  shall  all  pass  away, 
and  have  done  with  sorrow  and  sin  for  ever.  A  thousand 
times  have  I  thanked  the  Lord  for  all  my  trials  and  afflictions. 
I  would  not  have  been  without  them  for  worlds.  They  have 
been  messengers  of  boundless  love  and  mercy  to  me  and  mine. 
I  do  trust  this  will  be  your  rich  experience. ' 

TO  THE  REV.  J.  H.  E ,  ON  HIS  ILLNESS. 

"My  Beloved  Brother, —  October  isth,  1845. 

"The  word  in  my  heart  at  this  moment  is,  'Praise 


252  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

God  from  whom  all  blessings  flow.'  Yes,  beloved,  even  your 
trial,  your  present  trial,  shall  be  to  the  praise  of  His  dear  and 
holy  name.  Be  of  good  cheer,  God  has  sent  it ;  it  is  a  mes- 
senger of  love, — nothing  but  eternal,  boundless,  never-ending 
love.  The  Lord  sent  you  to  preach  glad  tidings  to  poor,  lost 
sinners ;  and  to  gather  in  His  own  sheep,  feeding  them  in  rich 
pastures,  and  causing  them  to  lie  down  beside  the  still  waters. 
But  now  He  has  closed  your  hps  for  a  season.  He  who  sent 
you  to  preach,  now  bids  you  cease  for  a  time,  until  again  He 
says,  '  Go  and  preach  the  preaching  that  I  bid  thee.'  Well, 
beloved,  is  He  not  as  full  of  love  in  all  this  as  ever  ?  Just 
the  very  same.  Only  trust  Him  for  all  consequences.  He  is 
doing  all  things  well.  Leave  yourself  in  His  blessed  hands, 
and  seek  more  for  cheerful  submission  than  for  the  removal  of 
the  trial.  Resignation  will  follow,  and  then,  what  a  calm  I 
Oh,  how  soothing  is  the  voice  of  our  Beloved  !  How  it  com- 
forts and  hushes  the  restless,  agitated  feelings  to  peace  !  we 
then  lie  quiet  in  His  hands,  and  feel  that  His  will  must  be  best, 
because  He  is  God,  and  knows  the  end  from  the  beginning, 
while  we  know  nothing.  Dear,  dear  brother,  let  us  rejoice 
that  you  and  I  are  in  His  loving  hands,  and  leave  ourselves 
there.  If  He  says  to  me,  '  Be  satisfied  to  be  lame  and  a  cripple 
for  the  little  remnant  of  your  pilgrimage  ; '  *  and  if  he  says  to 
you,  '  You  have  preached  My  gospel,  but  now  it  is  my  will 
that  you  be  silent ;'  what !  are  we  to  think  hardly  or  unkindly 
of  this  ?  How  restless  and  earnest  I  was  to  be  healed  ;  but 
no  healing  came,  until  prompted  by  the  Spirit  to  ask  for  suh- 
mission;  and  in  a  moment  it  was  given,  and  all  was  calm  and 
quiet  within.  And  what  then  ?  Li  due  season  the  cure  most 
unexpectedly  came,  and  I  was  made  whole.  So  may  it  be 
with  you,  my  tried  brother.  Be  assured  this  affliction  is  sent 
for  some  especial  good, — for  a  great  blessing  to  your  soul,  and 
to  the  church  at  large.  I  would  not  now  have  been  without 
my  trials,  no,  not  for  a  thousand  worlds.  Oh,  the  goodness  of 
God  was  so  richly  displayed,  that  I  have  no  power  of  language 
to  express  it.  Wondrous  is  He  in  His  dealings  with  us,  and 
He  is  dealing  with  us  every  moment  of  our  existence,  and 
we  with  Him.  How  little  does  the  world  know  of  the  won- 
drous transactions  that  are  going  on  every  instant  between 
lieaven  and  earth, — the  unceasing  intercourse   between  God 

*  The  allusion  is  to  a  lameness,  which  for  a  time  prevented  her  from 
walking,  and  which  threatened  to  render  her  decrepit  for  life. 


LETTERS   OF    CHRISTIAN   SYMPATHY.  253 

and  His  chosen  and  adopted  family !  But  why  should  I  en- 
large on  a  subject  to  you,  who  are  so  much  better  taught  than 
I  am  ?  only  you  are  now  in  the  cloud,  and  I  have  just  come 
out  of  it,  and  can  and  may  be  allowed  to  speak  a  w^ord  of 
comfort  to  your  tried  soul.  May  the  Lord  comfort  and  guide 
you  in  every  step,  and  enable  you  to  lie  passive  in  His  loving 
hands." 

TO  MRS.  H ,  ON  THE  DEATH  OF  HER  HUSBAND. 

"  Dear  Sister  in  Jesus, —  January  9tb,  1853. 

"  I  may  say,  too,  in  tribulation,  for  the  Lord  has  writ- 
ten you  a  widow  indeed.  Such  are  His  loving  dealings 
towards  those,  one  and  all,  whom  the  Father  has  given  Him. 
We  must  all  pass  through  much  tribulation  to  the  kingdom  He 
has  gone  to  prepare  for  us.  Let  us,  then,  take  up  the  cross, 
and  follow  hard  after  Him.  A  little  while,  and  we  shall  be 
there,  and  join  all  who  have  got  there  before  us.  Sweet 
thought !  Oh,  let  us  try  and  realize  it.  Heaven  is  not  so  far 
off  as  we  imagine.  The  world  of  spirits  is  all  around  us. 
Absent  from  the  body,  we  are  present  with  the  Lord.  Dear 
friend,  I  do  trust  this  trial  will  draw  you  so  sensibly  near  to 
Jesus  as  to  enable  you  to  go  on  your  way,  realizing  more  and 
more  the  gracious  manifestations  of  the  Lord  to  your  wid- 
owed spirit.  Jesus  is  always  near  to  you,  listening  to  hear 
what  you  would  say  to  Him.  Take  Him  now  as  your  Hus- 
band, Friend,  and  Brother, — that  Brother  born  for  your  adver- 
sity. Oh,  is  He  not  all  that  you  could  wish  or  desire  ?  Take 
Him  for  your  constant  companion ;  He  will  never  fail  you. 
I  feel  my  time  here  cannot,  in  the  common  course  of  nature, 
be  very  long.  But,  as  I  draw  nearer  and  nearer,  heaven  seems 
to  open  with  increasing  attraction ;  and  the  prospect  of  seeing 
Jesus,  that  same  Jesus  that  bore  all  my  sins  on  the  accursed 
tree,  and  so  many  dear  to  me  in  the  ties  of  nature,  around 
that  glorious  throne  where  Jesus  sits,  fills  me  with  joy  unspeak- 
able and  full  of  glory.  It  is  all  true.  I  can  see  afar  off,  as  it 
were ;  the  distance  seems  to  vanish,  and  the  realities  of  the 
better  world  seem  sensibly  near.  Oh,  dear  friend,  live  upon 
your  best  Friend.  There  is  nothing  too  small  to  carry  to  Jesus. 
Abroad,  at  home,  in  company,  or  in  the  street,  lift  up  your 
heart,  and  tell  Him  all  you  feel  and  all  you  desire.  Aim  to 
have  constant  communion  with  Him.  Let  Him  not  be  long 
out  of  your  sight.     Oh,  to  have  to  do  with  Jesus,  and  with 


254  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

Jesus  only!  Do  not  make  up  your  mind  to  do  aught  before 
you  ask  counsel  from  Him.  The  heart  is  deceitful,  and  will 
lead  us  astray.  Let  us  be  very  jealous  over  this  inward  foe, 
and  only  consult  our  dearest  and  best  Friend.  .  .  .  If  it  be 
pleasant  to  have  fellowship  with  the  saints  of  the  Lord  in  the 
midst  of  much  imperfection,  what  must  it  be  when  we  get 
home,  and  cluster  altogether  around  the  feet  of  Jesus,  who 
lived  and  died,  and  rose  again  for  us  !  Oh,  help  me  to  praise 
Him  !  You  cannot  think  how  often  I  take  my  walks  above, 
and  how  pleasant  they  are.  It  is  so  real.  I  seem  to  see  so 
many  I  have  loved,  and  had  fellowship  with  here,  all  around 
the  throne  ;  and  to  see  that  loving,  tender,  sympathizing  Jesus, 
who  once  was  a  man  of  sorrows,  who  bore  my  sins,  paid  all 
my  great  debt,  and  ransomed  my  soul  from  the  destroyer, — 
now,  in  all  His  glory  and  infinite  beauty,  waiting  to  welcome 
home  every  new-born  soul.  Oh,  He  is  an  ocean  of  love, — 
nothing  but  love  is  in  His  dear  heart  towards  you  and  me. 
Who  would  not  serve  Him  here  that  knows  Him  ?  Follow 
on,  dear  friend,  to  know  more  and  more  of  Him.  Keep  up  a 
constant  intercourse  with  Him.  I  hardly  know  how  to  stop, 
my  heart  is  so  full.  Pray  for  me,  and  may  His  sweetest  bless- 
ings be  with  you." 

TO    MR.    W ,    ON    THE    DEATH    OF    HIS    WIFE. 

"...  The  Lord  has  laid  His  heavy  hand  upon  you.  All 
is  in  love.  May  He  open  your  eye  to  see  it.  He  loves  us 
too  well  to  afflict  us  without  a  need-be.  When  we  get  above, 
we  shall  see  how  needful  the  chastening  of  Him  who  loves  us, 
for  our  preparation  for  the  full  enjoyment  of  that  place  He  has 
gone  to  prepare  for  us.  Oh,  what  a  change !  from  earth  to 
heaven — from  a  suffering  bed  to  a  mansion  of  glory.  You 
are  the  sufferer ;  but  dry  your  tears,  for  home  will  come  at 
last,  and  may  we  receive  from  His  own  loving  lips  a  Well 
done^  good  and  faithful  servant ;  enter  thou  into  the  joy  of  thy 
Lord.  I  feel  for  you,  and  pray  you  may  be  sustained  and  com- 
forted of  God.  Jesus  is  very  near.  He  is  ordering  all  things 
for  you.  He  docs  not  willingly  afflict  us.  It  is  to  wean  us 
from  a  dying  world  and  from  ourselves.  We  too  much  grovel 
here ;  tlie  Lord  sees  the  encroachment  of  earthly  ties,  which 
leave  but  half  for  Him.  Let  us,  then,  gird  up  the  loins  of 
our  mind,  and  make  a  fresh  start  for  heaven.  A  crown  of 
glory  awaits  us.     Jesus,  the  very  same  Jesus,  is  on  the  throne, 


LETTERS   OF    CHRISTIAN   SYMPATHY.  255 

as  full  of  love,  compassion,  and  sympathy  as  when  a  man  of 
sorrows  here  upon  earth.  And,  although  He  has  taken  wife 
and  child  from  you,  blessedly  housing  them  near  Himself,  He 
has  not  taken  Himself,  but  is  with  you,  and  will  comfort  your 
poor  sorrowing  heart.  Soon  you  will  meet  again  those  you 
love,  and  be  for  ever  with  the  Lord.  Oh,  the  glory  that 
awaits  the  Christian  !  By  all  these  painful  dispensations  He 
is  preparing  us  for  the  full  enjoyment  of  that  glory — glory 
begun  here — glory  increasing  throughout  eternity.  This 
world  is  not  worth  a  thought ;  and  we  should  ever  bear  in 
mind,  it  is  but  a  passage  to  a  better.  .  .  .  Dear  brother, 
let  this  fresh  trial,  like  a  stormy  gale,  drive  you  nearer  and 
still  nearer  to  Jesus.  Make  Him  your  all  in  alk  Live  upon 
Him,  and  you  may  hve  with  Him  even  here  upon  earth.  Oh, 
it  is  a  little  taste  of  heaven  below  to  enjoy  the  lifting  up  of 
His  own  loving  countenance.  Covet  these  gracious  manifesta- 
tions of  His  presence  to  your  soul.  Heaven  is  all  around  us. 
Angels  are  the  Lord's  messengers  watching  over  every  step. 
Yes. 

*  The  hour,  the  hour  is  hastening. 

Spirit  shall  with  spirit  blend, 
Frail  mortality  is  wasting, 

Then  the  secret  all  shall  end. 

'  Let,  then,  the  thought  hold  sweet  communion, 

Let  us  breathe  the  mutual  prayer  ; 
Till  in  heaven's  eternal  union 

We  meet  with  those  we've  loved  while  here.' 

"  May  this  season  of  sorrow  draw  you  closer  to  his  heart." 

to  an  afflicted  friend. 
"  My  dear  Friend, — 

"  The  Lord  has  tried  you  of  late,  and  I  do  feel  anxious 
to  speak  a  word  of  comfort  to  you  in  this  affliction.  Those 
whom  He  loves  He  invariably  tries.  The  graces  of  the  Spirit 
are  thus  brought  into  holy  exercise.  Jesus  is  thereby  hon- 
oured, and  our  souls  ascend  a  higher  round  in  that  ladder  that 
reaches  from  earth  to  heaven.  We  must  sit  at  His  feet,  and 
believe  that  He  does  all  things  well.  What  we  know  not  now, 
we  shall  know  hereafter.  The  Judge  of  all  the  earth  must  do 
right.  Oh,  let  us  cling  closer  and  closer  to  Him  than  ever. 
Let  us  make  Him  our  all  in  all.  Oh,  to  live  for  eternity ! 
Eternity !    solemn  thought !     The  eye,  the  all-searching  eye 


256  MEMOIR   OP   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

of  God  IS  upon  us  at  this  moment.  May  the  constraining  love 
of  Christ,  the  eternal  love  of  the  Father,  and  the  sanctify- 
ing love  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  rest  upon  you,  guide,  and  bless 
you." 


TO    MISS    E.    W- 


"  Dear  Friend, —  April  1 6th. 

"You  are  one  of  God's  tried  ones.  The  trial  of  your 
faith  is  much  more  precious  then  gold,  for  it  will  appear  in  the 
end  that  it  was  needful,  and  that  you  could  not  have  done 
without  it.  Do  not  think,  because  I  have  not  written  for  some 
time,  that  I  have  forgotten  you.  Ah,  no !  You  have  often 
been  in  my  heart. 

"  Dear  friend,  this  is  our  season  for  the  trial  of  faith,  and  every 
fresh  trial,  under  the  loving  eye  of  Jesus,  and  sanctified  by  the 
indwelling  Spirit,  is  like  a  fresh  gale  wafting  us  nearer  and 
nearer  to  our  port — to  the  place  He  has  gone  to  prepare  for 
us.  All  these  things  work  together  for  our  prosperity  of  soul. 
'Heaven  is  a  prepared  place,  for  a  prepared  people,' — the  one 
family  of  God.  Oh,  beloved,  what  must  it  be  to  be  there !  1 
am  now  living  on  the  verge  of  it.  A  few  weary  steps  more, 
and  I  shall  be  put  into  my  possessions,  all  prepared  by  the 
hand  of  eternal,  unchanging  love.  "We  shall  never  think  when 
we  get  there  that  we  had  one  trial  too  many.  "We  shall  see, 
too,  that  we  could  not  have  done  without  one  of  them,  for  that 
all  were  so  many  needful  lessons  to  instruct  us  in  a  journey 
through  a  wilderness  full  of  temptation ;  and  that  Infinite  wis- 
dom had  chosen  them  for  us.  I  know  your  trials  are  often 
great,  but  the  loving  eye  of  Jesus  is  upon  you,  and  your  name 
is  deeply  engraved  upon  His  heart.  Whom  He  loves  He 
loves  unto  death.  I  am  near  my  eternal  home.  Jesus  is  very 
precious  and  His  presence  is  sensibly  with  me.  I  have  at 
times  most  precious  glimpses  of  the  glory  of  heaven,  and  of  the 
reality  of  the  resurrection — of  Jesus  seated  on  the  throne,  look- 
ing as  full  of  pity,  sympathy,  and  boundless  love  upon  all  the 
weakest  of  His  little  flock,  as  when  here  below.  He  is  just 
the  same  now.  Go  to  Him  at  once,  dear  friend,  be  your 
trouble  Avliat  it  may.  Lift  up  your  heart,  though  surrounded 
with  company,  or  sitting  by  your  dear  sick  sister  ;  only  raise 
it,  in  silent  breathing,  and  He  will  hear  and  answer.  It  will 
be  the  prayer  of  faith — the  faith  of  one  who  feels  she  has  no 
help  but  Jesus.     May  his  sweetest,  richest  blessing  rest  upon 


LETTERS   OF    CHRISTIAN    SYMPATHY.  257 

you,  my  dear  sister ;  and  if  I  see  you  no  more  here,  I  will 
meet  and  welcome  you  above. 

"P.  S. — I  live  now  more  as  a  little  helpless  child  (an  infant) 
upon  Christ,  than  ever  I  did  in  my  long  hfe." 

TO    THE    REV.    B.    P ,  AT    A    TIME    OF    SEVERE    DOMESTIC 

AFFLICTION. 

"  Leamington,  Oct.  26th, 
"Dear  Brother  in  a  precious  Jesus, — 

"  One  in  Christ,  and  in  the  kingdom  of  tribulation,  I 
feel  a  desire  to  drop  you  a  line,  though  personally  unknown. 
You  are  in  trouble — this  is  enough — and  having  myself  passed 
through  the  same,  I  feel  doubly  anxious  to  speak  a  w^ord,  if  the 
Lord  permit,  of  comfort  to  your  w^eary  and  tried  spirit.  It  is 
through  much  tribulation  we  are  to  enter  the  kingdom — how 
true  is  this  to  every  saint !  .  .  .  Oh,  dear  brother,  it  is  an 
honour  put  upon  a  saint  of  God  to  be  called  to  taste  a  little  of 
that  sorrow  through  which  Jesus,  our  Elder  Brother,  passed 
for  us.  Deep,  awful,  and  mysterious  was  His  tribulation  when 
our  heavy  debt  was  laid  upon  His  righteous  soul.  What  we 
are  called  to  taste  is  but  to  refine  and  meeten  us  for  the  full 
enjoyment  of  that  place  He  has  gone  to  prepare  for  us.  Be  it 
so,  Lord,  only  let  our  tribulation  cause  us  to  cling  closer  and 
closer  to  Thyself.  I  am  sure  this  will  find  an  echo  in  your 
soul.  Submission  to  His  loving  will  under  trial  He  only  can 
give.  In  vain  we  try  ourselves — our  reasoning  powers  will 
not  avail  us :  our  deceitful  hearts  will  argue  the  point,  and 
leave  us  as  far  off  its  attainment  as  ever.  We  must  go  in  all  our 
helplessness  to  Him  who  has  said.  Without  Me  ye  can  do 
nothing.  Dear  brother,  this  you  know  better  than  I  do.  But 
this  I  know,  that  when  a  storm  comes  upon  us,  often  a  mist  is 
cast  before  us  by  the  enemy,  and  we  cannot  clearly  see  our 
way ;  then  is  the  time  to  cast  ourselves  at  the  feet  of  Him  who 
is  watching  over  us  with  a  loving,  sleepless  eye.  We  are  in 
the  furnace,  but  not  alone  ;  the  Son  of  God  is  with  us,  saying. 
Be  not  afraid^  it  is  I.  I  have  passed  through  deep,  dark 
waters,  but  I  now  feel  that  these  things  were  sent  for  my  good, 
and  I  would  not  have  been  without  His  chastening  for  ten 
thousand  worlds,  and  you  will  have  to  declare  the  same.  The 
Lord  deals  with  us  with  a  view  of  causing  us  to  know  more  of 
His  wondrous  love,  and  the  glorious  mystery  of  fellowship  with 
his  suffering.     Jesus  who  loves  us  has  '  done  all  things  well,' 


258  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

and  tliis  we  shall  acknowledge  before  angels  and  men.  I  should 
never  have  known  so  much  the  tender  sympathy,  gentleness, 
and  matchless  love  that  there  is  in  the  heart  of  Jesus,  nor  have 
enjoyed  so  much  union  and  communion  with  Him,  or  the  inter- 
change of  a  holy  recognition,  but  for  His  dealings.  .  .  . 
The  Holy  Spirit  is  given  since  Jesus  came  to  restore,  in  a 
measure,  the  sensible  presence  of  a  good  and  gracious  Father 
to  His  children.  And  those  who  walk  closely  with  God  are 
permitted  to  hear  His  voice,  evermore  speaking  to  them  by 
the  Spirit  within.  Great  is  the  mystery  of  godliness  !  Oh,  to 
hold  fast  our  oneness  with  Jesus !  To  come  with  an  open 
heart,  in  all  our  helplessness,  and  tell  Him  all.  Is  not  this  a 
mighty  privilege  for  a  poor,  helpless  sinner  ?  What  need  we 
fear  when  He  invites  us  to  cast  our  burden  upon  Him  who  is 
able  to  bear  our  burden  and  sustain  us  too  ?  We  want  more 
childlike  simplicity  in  obeying  the  commands  of  Christ.  Soon 
we  pass  away  to  our  heavenly  inheritance,  and  then  we  shall 
see  all  the  way  He  led  us  through  the  wilderness  was  the  right 
way,  and  that  not  one  trial  or  cross  could  have  been  dispensed 
with.  Forgive  me  for  troubling  you  Avith  this,  written  amidst 
much  interruption ;  but  the  Lord  laid  you  on  my  heart,  and  I 
could  not  refrain  from  telling  you  so. 

Accompanying  the  preceding  and  touching  letter,  addressed 
to  an  honourable  servant  of  Christ,  was  a  copy  of  the  following 
exquisite  lines  on  Christian  sympathy,  for  which  she  might 
have  sat  as  the  original  to  the  gifted  author : — 

"  Must  I  my  brother  keep, 

And  share  his  pains  and  toil; 
And  weep  witli  those  that  weep, 

And  smile  with  those  that  smile? 
And  act  to  each  a  brother's  part, 
And  feel  his  sorrows  in  my  heart  ? 

"  Must  I  his  burden  bear, 

As  though  it  were  my  own, 
And  do  as  I  would  care 

Should  to  myself  be  done  ; 
And  faithful  to  his  interests  prove, 
And  as  myself  my  neighbour  love  ? 

•'  Must  T  reprove  his  sin, 

Must  I  partake  his  grie^ 
And  kiudl}'  enter  in 

And  minister  relief; 
The  naked  clothe,  the  hungry  feed, 
And  love  him  not  in  word,  but  deed? 


DIARY.  259 

"  Then,  Jesus,  at  thy  feet 
A  student  let  me  be, 
And  learn,  as  it  is  meet, 

My  duty.  Lord,  of  Thee : 
For  thou  didst  come  on  mercy's  plan, 
And  all  thy  life  was  love  to  man. 

"  Oh,  make  me  as  Thou  art, 

Thy  Spirit,  Lord,  bestow ; 
The  kind  and  gentle  heart 

That  feels  another's  woe, 
Tliat  thus  I  may  be  like  my  Head, 
And  in  my  Saviour's  footsteps  tread."* 

Sucli  are  a  few  specimens — culled  from  an  extensive  corres- 
pondence— of  lier  letters  of  Christian  sympathy.  The  thoughts 
and  feelings  they  so  glowingly  express  welled  up  from  a  heart 
trained  in  that  most  blessed  and  instructive  of  all  schools — 
sanctified  sorrow.  Her  posture  while  penning  them  would 
seem  to  have  been  that  of  the  '  disciple  whom  Jesus  loved,' — 
leaning  upon  the  bosom  of  her  Lord ;  or,  to  quote  her  own 
expressive  words,  '  taking  her  walks  above,'  and  dating  as 
from  the  borders  of  the  Celestial  City.  Comforted  herself  by 
Jesus,  she  sought  to  lead  all  who  were  in  any  trouble  to  the 
same  divine  source  of  consolation.  From  heartfelt  experience 
she  could  say,  "  Oh,  taste  and  see  that  the  Lord  is  good !" 
Again  we  ask,  What,  though  this  Avere  her  only  gift,  where, 
in  the  Church  of  Christ,  is  there  one  more  rare  or  more  pre- 
cious ?  And  yet  what  Christian,  whose  consolation  has 
abounded  by  Christ,  may  not  go  and  do  likewise  ?  Who  that 
has  a  wound  healed  by  the  Saviour's  sympatliy,  may  not  gen- 
tly lead  another  bleeding  heart  to  Him  ?  It  is  thus  we  aid  Him 
in  His  mission  of  love  to  our  world.  We  recur  again  to  her 
Diary. 

"April  23rd. — Surely  I  have  seen  an  end  of  all  perfection 
both  in  myself  and  in  others.  But,  oh,  there  is  One,  and  only 
one,  and  He  is  perfect.  The  Lord  be  praised  for  this  !  The 
goodness,  the  long-suffering,  the  loving-kindness  of  God  sur- 
passes our  conceptions.  Eternity  only  can  unfold  it  to  us,  and 
we  shall  be  even  there  learning  it  out  for  ever  and  ever.  O 
Lord  Jesus,  make  me  holy — sanctify  me  for  Thyself  Fill  me 
with  Thyself,  that  I  may  know  what  it  is  to  be  filled  with  all 
the  fulness  of  God.     Sanctify  me,  body,  soul,  and  spirit." 

*  Rev.  Dr.  Raffles. 


260  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

"  27th. — When  disappointed  in  the  creature,  I  take  refuge 
at  once  in  Jesus.  I  run  to  Him,  and  find  Him  all  my  heart 
could  wish.  Oh,  how  precious  is  a  throne  of  grace  to  my  soul 
— a  meeting-place  between  a  holy  God  and  a  poor  sinner, 
sprinkled  with  the  blood  of  His  dear  Son,  and  ever  a  verdant 
spot,  inviting  a  poor,  needy,  trembling  sinner  at  all  times  and 
under  all  circumstances.  Lord,  how  could  I  live  without 
Thee?  Thou  art  my  all  in  all!  my  comfort,  my  joy,  my 
peace,  my  strengthener,  my  home  for  time  and  eternity." 

"30th. — How  intricate  is  often  the  believer's  way!  So 
hedged  up  that  He  cannot  discern  a  single  step  before  him. 
All  is  dark.  He  here  and  there  goes  too  often  to  the  creature 
for  counsel,  and,  perhaps,  for  sympathy,  but  finds  all  but  broken 
cisterns.  But  Jesus  is  at  hand — a  Fountain  of  living  waters, 
ever  ready  to  impart  all  comfort,  wisdom,  and  direction.  But, 
oh,  how  slow  to  approach  this  Fountain!  How  base  and  un- 
grateful the  heart,  and  wretched  the  unbelief  that  still  lurks 
within,  ever  leading  us  away  from  Him  who  is  a  present  help 
in  every  time  of  need.  Take  up  thy  rest,  oh,  my  soul,  in  Him 
who  hath  loved  thee  with  an  everlasting  love,  and  will  love 
thee  unto  the  end  !" 

"  There  is  a  voice— it  comes  to  me 
On  memory's  happy  wing, 
When  doubts  and  dark  despondency 

Their  fearful  shadows  fling ; 
'  I  am  thy  Helper,  I  thy  Friend, 
I'm  with  thee  always  to  the  end.' 

"  When  trials  came,  and  threat'ning  ill, 
And  dearest  comforts  fled, 
I  look'd  above  to  Zion's  hill, 

And  the  blest  promise  sped, 
To  soothe  my  heart,  to  chase  my  fear, 
'  I'm  with  thee  always — I  am  near.' 

"  When  duties  press'd  with  heavy  weight 

Upon  ray  bosom  sore, 
My  pathway  seemed  more  dark  and  strait. 

I  lieard  the  voice  before — 
'  Take  up  my  cross  and  follow  me, 
Soon  thou  shalt  my  salvation  see.' 

"  And  when  the  spoiler's  cruel  dart 

Had  toudi'd  my  fairest  flowers. 
Dear,  cherish'd  objects  of  my  heart. 

And  sadd'ning  all  my  hours. 
The  voice  then  came  so  small  and  still, 
It  bow'd  me  to  Jehovah's  will. 


DIARY.  261 


"  'Twas  dark  upon  life's  rugged  sea. 
And  friends  who  once  did  shine 
In  days  of  fair  prosperity, 

I  could  not  claim  as  mine  ; 
One  then  replied,  '  I  am  thy  Friend, 
I'm  with  thee  always  to  the  end.' 

"And  oft  when  sickness,  feverish  pain, 

Came  with  relentless  power, 
Methought  I  heard  the  voice  again, 

Sustaining  in  that  hour  ; 
*  I  am  thy  Saviour,  I  thy  Friend, 
I  will  be  with  thee  to  the  end.' 

"  And  when  the  strife  of  death  comes  near, 
And  darkly  rolls  cold  Jordan's  wave, 

I'll  look  to  yonder  brighter  sphere, 
To  Him  who  has  the  power  to  save. 

Oh  !  may  I  trust  Him  to  the  end. 
The  sinner's  everlasting  Friend  !" 


CHAPTER    XII. 

True  religion,  as  we  have  had  occasion  to  remark,  is  essen- 
tially experimental  in  its  nature.  Find  it  delineated  where 
we  may — in  the  sacred  volume,  or  in  the  uninspired  records  of 
the  saints  of  God — its  nature,  its  phases,  and  its  effects  are 
identically  the  same.  Who  can  trace  the  histories  of  Abra- 
ham, of  Moses,  and  of  Job — read  the  psalms  of  David — glide 
along  the  enchanting  stream  of  prophetic  truth — listen  to  the 
discourses  of  Jesus — peruse  the  letters  of  His  apostles,  or  catch 
the  last  tones  of  inspiration  as  they  float  from  the  lonely  Isle 
of  Patmos,  and  not  feel  that  true  Christianity  is  nothing  less 
than  the  life  of  Jesus  dwelling  in  the  soul  of  the  believer  ? 
But  Christian  experience  varies ;  it  may  be  more  strongly  de- 
veloped in  some  individuals  than  in  others.  One  believer  may 
present  a  more  robust  type  of  this  essential  characteristic  of 
Christianity  than  another.  It  is  not,  perhaps,  difficult  to  ac- 
count for  this  difference.  He  may  have  been  more  an  object 
of  God's  especial  dealings,  and  consequently  he  has  had  closer 
dealings  with  God.  He  may  have  been  more  variedly  tried, 
more  heavily  afflicted,  more  frequently  chastened ;  he  may 
have  been  led  into  a  deeper  insight  into  his  own  heart ;  he 
may  have  been  permitted  more  thoroughly  to  learn  his  native 
vileness  and  weakness,  and  by  a  process  most  painful  and 
humiliating ;  he  has  had  more  to  do  with  providential  dispen- 
sations— he  can  tell  of  bhghted  hopes,  of  disappointed  schemes, 
of  withered  flowers,  of  broken  cisterns  ;  he  has  become  more 
closely  acquainted  with  God ;  has  learnt  more  of  Jesus,  has 
kept  a  closer  eye  upon  the  hidden  work  of  the  Spirit  in  the 
heart ;  and  thus,  by  these  varied  processes,  he  has  become  a 
more  deeply  sjnritual  and  experimental  Christian,  Of  this  class 
Avas  the  honoured  subject  of  our  memoir.  Christian  experi- 
ence, in  some  of  its  most  holy,  lovely,  and  touching  unfoldings, 
was  pre-eminent  in  her  rehgious  hfe  and  correspondence.  Not 
[262] 


CHRISTIAN    EXPERIENCE.  263 

merely  do  we  trace  it  in  the  recorded  exercises  of  her  own 
soul,  but  also  in  the  intense,  holy  concern  she  felt  and  ex- 
pressed for  the  religious  progress  of  others.  To  the  illustra- 
tions already  given,  a  few  more  are  added,  gleaned  alike  from 
her  private  journal,  and  her  general  correspondence.  The  fol- 
lowing touching  resume  of  past  experience  is  taken  from  her 
diary. 

"'Faint  yet  pursuing,'  is  my  present  motto.  Hitherto  has 
the  Lord  been  with  me,  and  so  far  has  He  brought  me  on  my 
eventful  journey.  On  looking  back,  I  have  much  to  mourn 
over,  and  I  have  much  to  be  thankful  for, — mercy  and  good- 
ness, faithfulness  and  boundless  love,  have  followed  me  every 
step  of  the  way.  The  Lord  has  gently  and  tenderly  led  me 
on.  Once,  and  but  once,  He  laid  His  hand  sorely  upon  me. 
But  it  was  the  rod  of  the  '  covenant,  ordered  in  all  things  and 
sure.'  It  pressed  heavily.  I  could  not  discern  a  Father's 
hand.  Overwhelmed,  almost  stunned,  Avith  the  suddenness  of 
the  affliction,  I  lost  my  hold  and  confidence  in  Him  who  had 
said,  '■He  ivould  never  leave  nor  forsake  7??e.'  The  enemy  seemed 
to  sift  me  as  wheat.  Bereaved  of  an  affectionate  husband — 
deprived  of  fortune — friends  far  away — in  a  strange  land, 
heart-broken  and  alone — while  the  pitiless  storm  raged  over 
me,  I  would  steal  away  and  weep  in  secret  agony.  Such  was 
my  state  and  such  my  misery,  when  the  Lord  sent  a  man  of 
God  to  me  with  a  message  of  love  to  my  soul.  He  spoke  of 
the  unalterable  love  of  Jesus,  and  of  His  never-failing  com- 
passion, even  while  He  chastened.  He  opened  up  and  unfolded 
the  precious  truths  of  the  gospel  with  such  power  accompany- 
ing every  word,  that  I  once  more  raised  my  head,  and  lifted 
up  my  heart  to  God  as  my  Father  still ;  who  though  He  had 
chastened  me,  yet  His  anger  was  turned  away,  and  I  was 
comforted.  Many,  since  then,  have  been  the  trials  I  have  had 
to  pass  through,  but  the  Lord  has  stood  by  me,  and  delivered 
me  out  of  them  all.  Strength  has  been  given  to  me  equal  to 
my  day.  The  precept  was  laid  upon  my  heart,  Owe  no  man 
anything ;  and  I  have  been  enabled  to  walk  in  that  precept, 
and  God  has  fulfilled  the  promise.  Your  bread  shall  be  given 
you,  and  your  luater  shall  be  sure.  I  was  led  to  walk  by  faith 
in  an  unseen  Protector,  Provider,  and  Friend.  I  never  went 
to  bed  owing  anything  but  love.  I  repaired  to  God  for  all  I 
wanted,  feeling  I  w^as  His  child  and  doubly  so  as  his  w^idowed 
child.     As  such,  I  called  upon  Him  in  every  time  of  need  for 


264  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

counsel  in  difficulty,  for  strength  in  weakness,  for  healing  in 
sickness,  for  supplies  of  grace  to  uphold  and  keep  me  near 
Himself,  my  best,  my  only  Friend  on  earth  and  in  heaven. 
He  never,  no,  never  failed  me.  His  ear  was  ever  open  to  my 
cry,  and  His  love  shed  abroad  in  my  heart,  was  my  joy  and 
my  comfort  by  day  and  by  night.  My  children  are  grown  up 
— some  are  walking  among  those  that  fear  His  name  ;  and  I 
still  pray  and  believe  that  the  promise  will  be  fulfilled  which 
He  gave  me  in  the  early  days  of  my  lonely  widowhood — /  ivill 
he  a  Father  to  thy  fatherless  children.  How  can  He  be  a  Father, 
and  one  be  lost  ?  Not  so,  Lord,  for  Thy  word  shall  never  fail 
of  all  that  Thou  hast  put  Thy  name  to." 

''How  is  it  with  Thee  now,  0  my  soul?  Is  thy  God  still 
gracious,  and  art  thou  yet  upheld  and  comforted  ?  Has  old 
age  overtaken  thee,  and  thy  pains  thickened  upon  thee,  and  is 
thy  God  still  faithful  to  His  promise  ?  Yes,  oh  yes !  He  is 
all  and  everything  He  has  said  He  would  be.  He  is  my  joy 
by  night  and  by  day.  My  comfort  in  sorrow — my  stay  in 
trouble — my  strength  in  weakness — the  lifter  up  of  my  head, 
and  my  portion  for  ever.     God  be  praised  !     God  be  praised  ! " 

"  Still,  I  have  cause  to  praise  and  bless  the  God  of  my  sal- 
vation, and  the  God  of  all  my  comforts.  '  His  loving-kindness, 
oh,  how  great!'  I  am,  however,  still  called  to  fight,  to  watch 
and  pray.  The  world  with  its  cares,  unbelief  with  its  fears, 
and  Satan  ever  on  the  watch  to  tempt,  harass,  and  allure :  and 
yet,  in  the  midst  of  it  all,  the  Lord  indulges  me  with  much 
nearness  to  Himself,  and  a  subdued  heart  at  a  throne  of  grace. 
I  pray,  and  praise,  and  weep  before  Him,  and  feel  He  is  my 
Father  in  heaven.  Jesus  is  precious.  I  felt  to-day  as  if  I 
could  say  I  loved  Him  better  than  all  created  beings,  however 
near  and  dear  to  me.  But,  while  thus  pouring  out  my  heart 
to  Him,  I  tliought  of  poor  Peter,  and  remembered  how  httle 
he  knew  of  his  own  heart  when  he  said  so  boldly  that  he  was 
willing  to  lay  down  his  life  for  his  beloved  Master.  I  acknowl- 
edged my  inability  to  do  better  than  Peter,  but  could  say, 
I  did  desire  to  love  Him  supremely  from  my  very  heart,  and  to 
prefer  His  love  to  every  other  love  beside." 

"February  28th. — This  day  I  am  nearly  three-score  years 
and  ten,  and  during  that  period  the  Lord  has  borne  with  my 
manners  in  the  wilderness,  while  goodness  and  mercy  have 
followed  me  all  the  way.  What  shall  I  do,  or  what  can  I  say 
to  Thee,  thou  God  of  love !     Oh,  for  a  heart  filled  with  grace. 


DIARY.  265 

that  I  may  make  some  little  return  for  sucn  an  ocean  of  good- 
ness!  But  no,  I  must  still  come  a  poor,  needy,  unworthy 
sinner  to  the  throne  of  grace.  The  dust  is  my  proper  place ; 
there  must  I  lie.  But  a  little  space  may  now  be  left  me  ;  my 
journey  may  soon  come  to  an  end.  How  glorious  does  the 
gospel  appear  to  my  soul !  It  just  suits  my  case.  Blessed  be 
the  Father  of  our  Lord  Jesus  Christ  for  His  unspeakable  gift. 
And  oh,  the  thought,  that  if  I  had  been  the  only  sinner  on  the 
face  of  the  earth  to  be  saved.  He  must  have  died — He  must 
have  been  that  Man  of  sorrows — He  must  have  sunk  down  to 
the  utmost  depth  of  degradation — He  must  have  grappled  with 
death,  hell,  and  the  grave — He  must  have  shed  every  drop  of 
that  rich  blood  that  cleanseth  from  all  sin,  ere  I  could  have 
entered  the  kingdom  of  heaven !  Oh,  then,  how  vile  am  I  to 
serve  Him  so  ill,  and  make  so  few  returns  of  love  for  such  an 
ocean  !  God  knows  it  is  my  desire  to  love  Him  supremely,  to 
live  to  Him,  and  to  live  for  Him,  and  Him  only.  But  oh,  this 
heart  of  mine  !  what  can  I  do  with  it  ?  Lord  help  me  !  Help 
one  that  is  willing  to  be  helped,  and  looks  alone  to  Thee  for 
that  help  she  so  much  needs." 

"I  felt  humbled  at  what  passed  last  evening — too  much 
trifling  conversation.  I  do  hope  the  Lord  did  bring  me  to  His 
footstool  this  morning  with  a  broken  heart.  I  think  there  is 
more  danger  in  being  with  lukewarm  professors  than  with  the 
unconverted.  I  shed  many  tears,  and  abhorred  myself  before 
Him.  Oh,  the  exquisite  tenderness,  compassion,  and  long- 
suffering  of  Jesus  towards  such  a  one !  Oh,  for  more  wisdom, 
discretion,  and  the  power  of  the  Spirit  within  !  Blessed  be  His 
holy  name,  for  every  precious  promise  He  has  left  to  encour- 
age our  souls  in  this  incessant  warfare.  Trying  it  often  is ; 
there  is  no  other  help  but  to  run  to  Jesus,  and  the  Fountain 
opened  for  sin.  It  is  there  we  get  the  broken  and  contrite 
heart,  and  fresh  strength  to  go  on  in  spite  of  all  that  opposes 
us  in  our  progress  homewards.  Lord,  strengthen  Thy  poor, 
aged,  feeble  one,  and  keep  me  moment  by  moment,  as  in  the 
hollow  of  Thy  hand.  Leave  me  not  to  dishonour  Thee  in  old 
age.  Hitherto  Thou  hast  upheld  me,  and  not  suffered  me  out- 
w^ardly  to  dishonour  Thee.  Thine  holy  eyes  have  seen  enough 
to  cast  me  off  for  ever ;  but  oh,  for  ever  blessed  be  Thy  name, 
though  Thou  hast  in  some  measure  rebuked  and  chastened, 
and  caused  me  to  see  and  lament  my  sin,  Thou  hast  kept  my 
secrets  within  Thine  own  loving  bosom,  thou  most  precious 
12 


266  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

Son  of  God.  This  it  is  that  breaks  my  heart,  and  causes  tears 
to  run  down  my  aged  cheeks.  Wliat,  oh  what  shall  I  render 
unto  Thee  for  Thy  wondrous  goodness  and  patience  towards 
me  ?  Nothing  have  I  to  render.  I  am  poor  and  needy,  and 
dependent  upon  Thee  moment  by  moment.  God  be  praised 
for  such  a  Sav.iour,  just  suited  in  every  way  to  my  necessities. 
Oh,  for  a  heart  to  praise  and  bless  His  holy  holy  name!" 

"  There  is,  in  the  Christian  mind,  such  a  proneness  to  be 
satisfied  with  a  little.  No  pressing  onward  and  upward.  We 
receive  a  little,  and  then  sit  down  and  live  upon  it  until  it  is 
all  exhausted,  and  our  very  bones  stand  out  from  leanness. 
We  forget,  that  the  oftener  we  apply  for  more,  the  more  wel- 
come we  are,  and  the  holier  and  happier  we  become ;  and  not 
only  this,  but  the  more  we  receive,  the  more  we  feel  our  need 
of  deeper  supplies,  grow  in  grace,  and  in  the  knowledge  of  our 
Lord  and  Saviour  Jesus  Christ.  We  need  to  know  more  of 
Jesus.  The  more  frequently  we  go  to  Him,  the  better  Ave  shall 
know  Him.  Always  welcome.  Never  will  He  frown  a  poor 
beggar  from  His  footstool.  He  upbraids  us  for  not  coming. 
Ye  will  not  come  unto  Me.  Why  should  our  grace  droop,  and 
languish,  and  die,  when  we  can  repair  to  the  Fountain  of  living 
water,  at  all  times  and  under  all  circumstances?  Oh,  the 
blessing  of  having  such  an  Almighty  Friend  in  glory,  waiting 
to  be  gracious  to  us,  whose  power  is  infinite  in  heaven  and  on 
earth,  and  whose  love,  like  Himself,  is  from  everlasting  to 
everlasting  ! " 

"  It  is  a  lovely  day.  Experienced  a  precious  nearness  to 
Jesus  in  prayer.  Felt  I  loved  Him  above  all  earthly  love  ; 
that  to  me  He  was  the  chiefest  among  ten  thousand,  and  alto- 
gether lovely  to  my  soul.  Could  recall  all  His  tender  dealing, 
watchful  providence,  unwearied  care,  all-protecting  hand,  from 
infancy  to  the  present  moment.  I  delight  to  trace  before  Him 
His  wondrous,  unwearied  love,  in  His  providence  all  my  jour- 
ney through.  Oh,  what  a  God  has  He  been — and  what  returns? 
Often  the  basest.  How  humbling  is  this !  How  often  does 
the  remembrance  of  what  He  has  been  to  me,  and  what  I  have 
been  to  Him,  bring  tears  to  my  eyes." 

"What  a  grief  it  is  to  me  to  see  those  professing  Christ,  and 
yet  living  to  the  world.  If  ye  love  the  ivoi'ld,,  the  love  of  the 
Father  is  not  in  you.  Oh  that  all  this  evil  might  be  subdued 
in  me !  Truly  can  I  say,  in  my  flesh  dwelleth  no  good  thing. 
Lord,  put  thoughts  in  my  heart,   and  suitable  words  in  my 


DIARY.  267 

mouth,  that  I  may  speak  to  sinners — one  word  followed  with 
Thy  blessing !  Only  make  me  a  humble  instrument  of  some 
good  where  I  am.  Dear  Lord,  wilt  Thou  condescend  to  use 
me  for  Thyself,  and  for  the  good  of  those  around  me  ?  Often 
am  I  afraid  of  speaking,  lest  I  should  do  more  harm  than  good 
by  exciting  the  enmity  of  the  carnal  mind.  Lord,  when  I 
would  do  good,  evil  is  present  with  me.  Help  me.  I  am 
Thine,  and  Thou  art  mine  !  Oh,  thou  blessed  Spirit  of  all 
grace,  truth,  and  power,  work  that  in  me  that  shall  be  for  Thy 
glory,  and  the  good  of  poor  dying  souls.  Never  did  I  more 
feel  my  incompetency  to  do  anything,  or  to  speak  a  word  for 
Christ.  I  can  talk  to  those  who  love  Thee,  and  enjoy  it ;  but 
faithfully  and  fearlessly  to  speak  to  and  warn  the  empty  pro- 
fessor and  the  unrenewed  sinner,  I  shrink  from  it.  Precious 
and  beloved  Jesus,  help  and  strengthen  Thine  unworthy  one 
in  doing  what  is  right  in  Thy  sight." 

"Oct.  1st. — The  Lord  has  brought  me  in  safety  to  town 
through  His  tender  and  never-ceasing  mercy.  What  thanks 
do  I  owe  Him  for  His  watchful  providence  over  me  moment 
by  moment.  Among  other  blessings  would  I  praise  Him  for 
the  affection  and  devoted  love  of  my  children.  I  have  paid 
the  three  in  the  country  each  a  visit ;  and  never  did  a  mother 
meet  with  more  tenderness  and  love — anticipating  my  every 
wish,  and  watching  over  me  as  a  nurse  her  tender  babe.  God 
be  praised  for  all  His  unmerited  favours." 

"  I  cannot  see  God  for  one  moment  out  of  Christ.  I  behold 
Him  in  all  His  glorious  attributes  in  Jesus,  the  Son  of  His  love. 
He  that  hath  seen  Me  hath  seen  the  Father.  I  often  feel,  in 
drawing  near  the  throne  of  grace,  I  need  a  Father's  pity.  I  go 
to  Him  as  my  Father.  At  other  times  I  feel  I  need  all  the 
sympathy  and  tender  compassion  of  Christ's  manhood.  And, 
again,  I  feel  I  need  the  poAver  of  the  Holy  Ghost  within  me, 
to  teach,  to  sanctify,  and  to  heal.  Thus  a  Triune  Jehovah  is 
made  known  to  us  through  Jesus.  And  these  three — Father, 
Son,  and  Holy  Ghost — are,  one  and  all,  engaged  in  the  glori- 
ous work  of  saving  fallen  sinners.  God  be  praised  for  what 
we  do  know.     God  be  praised  !" 

"  Had  precious  nearness  to-day  in  pleading  for  my  children 
— much  sweet,  holy  liberty  in  prayer.  Oh,  how  blessed  are 
these  opportunities,  when  heaven  seems  opened,  and  God  re- 
veals the  love  of  His  heart,  and  His  willingness  to  do  all  we 
ask!     Felt,  too,  much  brokenness  of  heart,  under  a  deep  sense 


268  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

of  my  unworthiness  of  such  unbounded  love.  It  is  a  great 
comfort  to  me  to  think  that  the  Lord  knows  me  altogether.  I 
would  have  no  concealments  from  Him.  He  graciously  per- 
mits me  to  come  with  an  open  heart." 

"0  Lord,  my  God,  bring  salvation  to  my  house  again. 
Make  bare  Thine  holy  arm.  Remember  Thy  gracious  promise 
given  to  Thine  handmaid  in  the  time  of  her  deep  sorrow.  For 
ever  blessed  be  Thy  name  for  the  consolation  then  afforded 
her,  and  for  what  Thou  hast  so  wonderfully  accomplished. 
But,  dear  Lord,  there  is  yet  to  be  a  fulfilment  of  Thine  own 

precious  word.     Remember,  too,  in  great  mercy.  Lord,  . 

Open  Thou  his  eyes  to  behold  himself  a  sinner  in  Thy  sight, 
and  Thyself  able  to  save  to  the  uttermost.  Oh,  lay  him  low  in 
the  dust  of  self-abhorrence  at  Thy  dear  feet,  there  to  sue  for 
pardon  through  that  precious  blood  that  can  alone  cleanse  from 
sin.  Have  mercy  ere  he  goes  hence  ;  and  may  he  leave  a 
testimony  behind  him  to  the  precious  fulness  of  Thy  great  sal- 
vation." 

"  Unto  the  upright  there  ariseth  light  in  the  darkness.  Oh,  to 
walk  with  an  open,  unveiled  heart  w4th  God.  To  have  no 
concealments,  not  the  shadow  of  a  wish  to  conceal ;  but  rather 
rejoice  that  He  who  loves  us  knows  us  altogether  just  as  we 
are.  He  alone  can  heal  all  our  diseases,  and  help  all  our  infirm- 
ities. He  has  graciously  undertaken  to  meeten  us  for  that 
place  He  has  gone  to  prepare  for  us.  What  a  Saviour  is  ours  ! 
God  be  praised  for  His  unspeakable  gift." 

"  How  utterly  impossible  for  me  to  choose  for  myself.  This 
is  the  second  time  in  my  life,  w^hen  in  the  providence  of  God, 
I  have  had  to  decide  upon  a  point  of  some  moment,  and  which 
might  lead  to  important  results.  I  have  carried  it  again  and 
again  to  the  Lord,  but  to  this  moment  no  hght  has  shone  upon 
my  way.  I  think  I  feel  willing  to  have  no  wish  to  determine 
for  myself.  I  do  desire  that  the  Avill  of  the  Lord  should  be 
done  in  me.  Precious  Jesus,  my  Guide,  my  Guardian,  my  un- 
ceasing Friend,  undertake  for  me.  Still  I  am  to  walk  by  faith 
through  the  wilderness." 

"  I  believe  that  every  word  of  God  is  only  profitable  as  it  is 
wrought  out  in  the  soul,  often  by  trying  providences.  Head 
knowledge  will  not  do.  Hearing  with  the  outward  ear  profits 
not  the  soul.  It  makes  no  headway  towards  heaven,  and 
knows  nothing  of  the  love  of  Christ,  or  the  real  character  of 
God.     The  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus  is  more  known  in  one  deep 


DIARY.  269 

trial  than  in  years  of  smooth  saihng.  Worldly  prosperity  is 
unfavourable  soil  for  the  true  Christian  to  grow  in.  It  benumbs 
the  soul,  and  nothing  but  tlie  Almighty  power  of  God  can 
keep  it  from  the  sleep  of  death." 

"  My  posture  is  still  waiting  upon  God.  To  know  His  will 
is  my  chief  desire.  Be  still,  and  knoio  that  I  am  God.  These 
words  were  applied  to  my  soul  to-day  with  much  sweetness. 
I  think,  small  crosses  stir  up  the  corruptions  of  the  heart  more 
than  deep  afflictions.  The  flesh  frets  ;  pride  is  set  in  motion  ; 
and  at  once  the  soul  is  called  to  conflict  with  a  host  of  enemies 
that  lie  dormant  until  roused  to  strive  against  the  Spirit.  Sa- 
tan, then  is  busy,  and  the  soul  has,  with  all  speed,  to  betake 
itself  to  its  stronghold.  Oh,  it  is  then  the  throne  of  grace  is  a 
blessed  resource.     Jesus  is  most  precious." 

"  Blessed,  thrice  blessed,  is  the  prospect  of  eternal  companion- 
ship in  heaven  with  those  from  whom  we  differ  in  judgment 
upon  earth." 

"  What  a  brittle  thing  is  all  the  glory,  wealth,  and  honour 
of  this  vain  world  !  How  empty  and  what  trash  does  it  ap- 
pear !  And  yet  men  sell  their  souls  to  grasp  it,  and  at  last 
pass  away  from  it  and  find  it  all  a  phantom.  How  unceasing 
is  Satan  in  for  ever  bringing  it  before  our  eyes,  in  some  form 
or  other." 

"How  much  stronger  faith  it  requires  to  go  to  the  Lord  in 
our  little  difficulties  than  when  greater  troubles  press  us.  I 
feel,  at  times,  almost  ashamed  to  bring  my  small  trials,  and  feel 
as  if  it  required  an  apology.  But,  oh,  in  a  moment  I  am  helped, 
at  such  a  season  of  temptation,  to  prostrate  myself  before  the 
Lord,  and  humble  myself  for  the  pride  of  my  wretched  heart ; 
for  it  is  that,  aided  by  the  enemy,  that  creates  the  suggestion. 
In  one  sense,  all  our  circumstances  are  trifles  in  the  sight  of  a 
great  Almighty  God  ;  but  if  Christ  hath  said  that  tlie  very 
hairs  of  our  head  are  numbered,  how  much  more  does  He  con- 
descend to  care  for  what  is  a  trouble  to  us." 

The  following  presents  the  "  child  of  the  light  walking  in 
darkness."  This  was  not  often  her  dreary  path  ;  but  when  so, 
like  her  blessed  Saviour  on  the  cross,  her  faith  never  relin- 
quished its  hold  on  God. 

"  March  6th. — Good  and  gracious  has  been  the  Lord  to  me 
in  all  outward  comforts ;  but  my  soul  has  been  led  to  walk  in 
a  dark  way,  and  although  I  do  feel  Jesus  more  precious  than 
ever,  I  have  not  that  abiding  enjoyment  of  His  presence  as 


270  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

formerly.  I  am  greatly  straitened  in  myself,  and  particularly 
in  fomily  prayer  am  greatly  tried.  My  niind  is  confused,  and 
my  memory  tails  me,  and  the  presence  of  so  many  becomes  a 
snare  to  me,  that  I  feel  I  am  sinning  in  attempting  to  address 
the  heart  searching  God  in  such  a  state  of  mind.  The  Lord, 
the  Spirit,  has  withdrawn  His  sensible  presence,  and  my  soul 
has  been  in  great  trouble.  I  search  for  the  cause,  and  the 
more  I  search,  the  plainer  I  see  great  cause  indeed  wherefore 
He  should  leave  my  soul  to  barrenness  and  wandering.  Sure- 
ly, I  have  followed  Him  of  late  like  sorrowful  Mary,  and 
would  cry.  Oh,  that  it  were  with  me  as  in  days  that  are  past ! 
And  yet,  Jesus  is  not  out  of  sight,  and  I  feel  that  the  wealth 
of  ten  thousand  worlds  could  not  compensate  for  the  loss  of  the 
light  of  His  countenance.  I  feel,  at  times,  that  I  am  His,  and 
that  He  is  mine ;  l)ut  still  there  is  a  want  in  my  soul  that  He 
only  can  meet.  Lord,  help  me,  and  revive  Thy  work  for 
Jesus'  sake.  I  never  before  had  such  wrestling  with  God,  and 
never  before  walked  in  such  a  dark,  bewildering  way.  0  Lord, 
show  me  the  why  and  the  wherefore.  Subdue  my  sins,  give 
me  deep  repentance,  and  set  my  soul  once  more  at  happy,  holy 
liberty." 

"  20th. — Bless  the  Lord,  who  has  heard  the  voice  of  my 
supplication,  and  though  He  bore  long  with  me,  has  again 
spoken  peace  and  comfort  to  my  troubled,  tempest-tossed  soul. 
My  soul  rejoices  in  God  my  Saviour,  in  whom  is  all  my  hope 
and  my  salvation.'' 

Let  those  who  fear  the  Lord,  who  are  walking  in  darkness 
and  have  no  light,  be  encouraged  to  trust  in  the  Lord. 
"  Light  is  sow}i  for  the  righteous,  and  gladness  for  the  upright 
in  heart."  VTe  propose  following  these  extracts  from  her 
private  papers  with  selections  from  her  general  correspondence, 
as  still  further  illustrating  the  experimental  character  of  true 
godliness. 

TO    LADY    B .       ox    THE    SEALING    OF    THE    SPIRIT. 

"Dear  Lady  B ,  Leamingtou.  March  17th. 

" .  .  .  .  How  poor  and  trilling  is  everything  else, 
compared  with  the  glory  of  God  in  the  salvation  of  His  saints — 
in  their  well-being  and  their  progress  homeward.  It  is  a  certain 
thing,  that  there  is  no  standing  still  in  our  heavenly  course. 
T^^e  have  too  many  enemies  to  contend  with  to  allow  of  this. 
'We  have  need,  indeed,  of  all  the  help  we  can  obtain  from 


THE   SEALING   OF   THE   SPIRIT.  271 

above  and  below,  to  keep  our  feet  from  falling,  and  our  heart 
steadfast  in  the  way  to  glory.  "What  is  all  the  pomp,  and 
wealth,  and  rank  of  this  poor  fieetiiig  world,  in  contrast  with 
the  glory  that  shall  soon  be  revealed  in  all  them  that  love  His 
appearing  ?  In  whom  also  after  yc  believed  ye  were  sealed  with 
that  Holy  Spirit  of  jjrojiiise  w'hich  is  the  earnest  of  ovr  inheri- 
tance. Eph.  i.  13,  14.  This  passage  of  Scripture  is  very 
precious,  and  it  is  mosr  important  that  we  should  be  experi- 
nienially  and  practically  acquainted  with  it.  It  is  not  peculiar 
to  the  apostles  and  the  disciples  of  old  ;  but  it  belongs  to  you 
and  to  me,  and  it  should  be  a  question  of  great  moment  to  us 
both  ?  Have  I  been  sicaled  with  the  Holy  Spirit  of  promise  ? 
Have  I  the  witness  in  my  soul  that  I  am  a  child  of  God  ? 
Plave  I  really  believed,  and  am  I  thus  scaled  as  an  heir  of 
God,  and  a  joint-heir  with  Christ  Jesus?  Have  I  made  my 
calling  and  election  sure  to  myself?  Oh,  are  not  these  im- 
portant questions  to  put  to  ourselves,  particularly  when  we 
know  not  how  soon  we  may  be  called  to  render  in  an  account 
to  God  ?  One  step  and  we  are  there — in  the  very  presence 
of  a  holy,  heart-searching  Jehovah.  Is  there  anything  upon 
earth  of  equal  importance  to  this?  Earnestly,  then,  would  I 
urge  you  to  press  onward  ;  and  if  yet  unacquainted  with  the 
sealing  of  the  Spirit,  which  is  the  earnest  of  your  heavenly 
inheritance,  to  go  again  and  again  until  you  obtain  it.  It  is 
for  you.  It  is  the  certain  pledge  of  God's  eternal,  unchange- 
able love  to  your  soul.  Oh,  do  but  try  for  it.  Though  faint 
at  first,  it  will  increase  more  and  more.  It  is  the  image  of 
Christ  stamped  upon  the  soul  of  His  redeemed  one.  Oh,  to 
know  this  precious  Jesus  is  life  eternal.  The  world  is  passing 
away,  and  we  are  passing  away,  but  this  will  never  pass  away. 
I  feel  as  if  standing  on  the  very  verge  of  the  eternal  world — 
full  in  view  before  me — and  I  cannot  but  say  to  all  I  love,  The 
Bible  is  true — God  is  true — Jesus  is  true — all  that  He  has 
said  is  true.  He  stands  ready  to  receive,  to  pardon,  to  sanc- 
tify, and  to  SEAL  as  His  own,  all  who  come  to  Him,  and  has 
promised  that  He  will  cast  out  none  that  come.  I  should  like 
to  hear  that  all  is  well  with  you,  and  that  you  are  making  pro- 
gress heavenward,  homeward,  and  that  Jesus  is  increasingly 
precious  to  your  soul.  Oh,  I  do  love  the  saints.  I  have  this 
one  evidence  that  I  have  passed  from  death  unto  life,  because  I 
love  the  brethren.  All  who  love  Christ,  I  love.  And  I  shall 
love  them  even  better  when  I  get  above.     Heaven's  atmos- 


272  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

phere  is  love.  Christ's  heart  is  an  ocean  of  love.  Let  us 
endeavour  to  have  as  much  as  we  can  of  heaven  in  our  souls 
while  here.  'We  have  but  a  brief  space  left  to  show  our  love 
to  Christ.  Let  us  work  for  Him,  live  for  Him,  live  to  Him, 
and  look  forward  to  living  with  Him.  There  is  such  a  thing 
as  a  most  blessed  fellowship  and  communion  with  the  Saviour. 
I  once  heard  Mr.  Evans  say,  'there  were  some  professors  of 
religion  who  did  not  know  when  the  Lord  was  Avith  them, 
or  when  He  was  not.'  Is  not  this  a  most  painful  truth  ? 
Oh,  how  can  these  walk  happily  or  holily  in  such  a  state  of 
soul?     .     .     ." 

TO    THE    SAME. ON    A    SPIRITUAL    MINISTRY, 

"Your  pastor  has  been  obliged  again  to  leave  you;  but  oh, 
what  a  mercy,  although  the  under-shepherd  is  away,  the  Chief, 
faithful  Shepherd  never  leaves  his  flock.  How  much  the  soul 
needs  the  constant  supplies  of  spiritual  food  to  sustain  it  in 
health  and  vigour !  Christ  is  the  bread  of  the  spiritual  life, 
and  Christ  is  the  sum  and  substance  of  the  gospel ;  and  there- 
fore the  gospel  is  needful,  that  we  may  grow  in  grace.     And 

now,  dear  friend,  you  will  be  Avithout  it  at ,  I  fear.     Your 

work,  then,  is  before  you.  '  Ask  anything  in  My  name,  and 
it  shall  be  done  unto  you.'  You  want  the  gospel ;  it  is  more 
needful  for  you  than  your  necessary  food ;  you  want  it  for 
yourself,  for  those  you  love,  for  the  poor  around  you.  I  do  not 
urge  you  to  wander,  seeking  an  under-shepherd  that  you  think 
will  suit ;  but  I  do  say,  go  to  Jesus,  to  the  compassionate,  the 
Chief  Shepherd,  and  ask  Him  to  send  you  one  after  His  own 
heart.  Do  not  be  satisfied  with  going  once,  or  twice,  or 
thrice,  but  go,  and  continue  to  go,  taking  no  denial.  The 
Lord  loves  importunity.  A  greater  blessing  God  could  not 
send  you  than  this.  You  will  honour  Him  by  asking,  and  He 
will  honour  you  by  giving.  If  the  man  that  comes  does  not 
preach  Christ  from  first  to  last — if  he  puts  anything  else  in  as 
a  substitute — God  has  not  sent  him.  Then  go  and  tell  the 
Lord.  Oh,  let  this  be  a  grand  transaction  l^etween  God  and 
yourself.     .     .     .     ." 

TO    THE    SAME. ON    CONFORMITY    TO    THE    WORLD. 

"  What  a  difficult  matter  it  is  to  be  in  the  world,  and  yet 
not  to  be  of  the  world !  Our  Lord  has  said  of  his  disciples, 
They  are  not  of  the  world,  even  as  I  am  not  of  the  world.    Christ 


CONFORMITY   TO    THE   WORLD.  273 

himself  carried  out  this  principle.  He  passed  through  the 
world  as  one  who  was  not  of  it.  Oh,  that  we  could  but 
imitate  His  holj  example,  and  aim  onlj,  while  in  it,  so  to  let 
our  light  shine,  that  others  may  take  knowledge  of  us  that  we 
have  been  with  Jesus,  and  have  learned  of  Him.  It  should 
be  our  whole  endeavour  to  do  all  the  good  we  can  in  it  and 
for  it,  and  yet  to  set  at  nought  its  spirit,  its  principles,  and  its 
maxims.  '  How  can  this  be  ?'  I  think  I  hear  you  say.  Go 
to  Jesus,  and  ask  of  Him  strength  for  any  duty  that  devolves 
upon  us.  Without  Me  ye  can  do  nothing.  And  yet  with 
Christ  strengthening  us,  we  can  do  all  things.  What  a 
present  helper  is  Jesus  !  When  we  are  called  to  go  amongst 
those  who  know  not  God,  let  it  be  from  an  absolute  duty,  and 
with  a  desire  only  to  do  good  to  their  souls,  and  after  much 
prayer — honest,  sincere  prayer — to  be  preserved  from  evil. 
Oh,  how  much  need  have  we  to  watch  over  our  hearts,  and 
ask  the  Lord  to  purify  our  motives  in  all  that  we  do !  We 
have  need  to  keep  close  to  our  dearest,  our  best  Friend,  and 
beseech  Him  to  save  us  from  ourselves.  How  can  a  believer 
walk  through  this  world  safely  and  securely,  but  as  he  is  up- 
held by  a  strength  that  is  Omnipotent  ?....!  am  passing 
through  a  world  lying  in  the  wicked  one.  I  belong  to  an- 
other kingdom,  wliich  is  not  of  this  world.  I  am  a  subject  of 
the  kingdom  of  Christ ;  hence  it  is  my  duty  and  my  high 
privilege  to  obey  and  to  serve.  And,  oh.  His  service  is  no 
slavery ;  it  is  perfect  freedom.  Dear  friend,  see,  then,  our 
high  calling  !  He  has  called  you  and  me  to  come  out  of  the 
world  and  to  be  separate,  in  principle,  in  practice,  in  heart.  I 
once  sat  by  the  bedside  of  a  dying  saint.  She  had  devoted 
her  life  to  the  Lord,  and  no  one  could  say  but  that  she  walked 
as  a  believer  should  walk.  But,  oh,  her  great  grief,  when  she 
was  about  to  appear  before  Him  was,  that  she  had  lived  too 
much  to  the  world.  Her  sorrow  was  great ;  and,  although  she 
expressed  no  fear  as  to  her  acceptance  in  Christ,  yet,  on  look- 
ing back  upon  her  past  life,  she  saw  so  much  to  deplore  of 
heart-departures^  that  her  sorrow  in  this  respect  obscured,  in  a 
measure,  her  prospect  of  the  endless  glory  that  doubtless 
awaited  her,  and  which,  I  believe,  she  is  now  enjoying  with 
Him  she  loved — '  chosen  in  Christ  before  the  foundation  of 
the  world !'  .  .  ." 
12* 


274  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 


TO  A  BELOVED    FRIEND. ON    LOOKING  TO  JESUS  FOR 

EVIDENCES. 

"Dear  and  beloved  Friend, —  Tuesday  Evenino-. 

"I  have  just  returned  from  service,  and  found  your 
kind  letter.  Many,  many  thanks.  I  have  long  wished  to 
write  and  inquire  how  it  was  with  your  soul,  which,  I  believe, 
is  as  dear  to  Christ  as  the  apple  of  His  eye.  .  .  .  Precious 
friend,  look  full  at  Jesus.  Look  no  longer  to  your  own  weak, 
sinful  heart.  Look  ujjon  Me,  and  he  ye  saved.  Only  believe^ 
and  you  shall  have  eternal  life.  It  is  the  record  God  has  given 
of  His  dear  Son  we  are  called  to  believe  ;  and  the  moment  you 
believe  this  with  all  your  heart,  you  have  peace.  All  your 
trouble  arises  from  your  looking  for  evidences  within ;  and 
when  Satan  blinds  your  eye,  and  you  cannot  find  them,  direct- 
ly you  think  you  have  no  part  or  lot  in  this  matter.  Your 
salvation  does  not  hinge  in  the  slightest  degree  upon  what  is 
done  in  you  or  by  you,  but  what  Christ  has  done  for  sinners ; 
and  if  you  are  a  sinner,  then  Christ  has  done  it  for  you.  Oh, 
look  and  live !  Keep  your  eye  upon  Jesus.  Try  and  realize 
the  simple,  plain,  matter-of-fact  truth  that  God  was  in  Christ 
Jesus !  that  He  came  into  the  world  for  the  express  purpose 
of  saving  sinners,  the  vilest  of  the  vile  ;  and  that  He  rose  from 
the  dead,  and  is  now  above,  at  the  right  hand  of  the  Father, 
to  fulfil  every  promise  he  has  left  in  His  last  will,  signed  with 
His  own  blood.  Now,  faith  does  not  consist  in  believing  that 
I  am  a  believer,  but  in  believing  in  Jesus  Christ ;  and  all  the 
rest — ^joy,  peace,  love,  hope,  and  every  other  blessing — will 
assuredly  follow.  Oh,  how  simple  is  faith,  and  how  many 
make  a  Christ  of  it,  when  it  is  nothing  more  than  believing ! 
But,  lest  I  should  mislead  here :  this  faith  is  a  divine  opera- 
tion, and  is  the  gift  of  God ;  but  all  that  we  have  to  do  is  to 
deal  with  the  matter-of-fact  truth  of  the  Gopsel.  In  the  Acts 
of  the  Apostles,  you  will  find  that  they  invariably  stated  to 
sinners  the  things  concerning  Jesus,  and  when  they  heard  they 
believed  and  rejoiced.  You  do  not  find  they  looked  into  their 
own  hearts  for  evidences  when  they  were  called  to  believe. 
They  received  the  truth  at  once,  and  rejoiced  with  a  joy  un- 
speakable and  fall  of  glory.  AYe  are  to  look  for  comfort  only 
to  Christ.  The  bitten  Israelites  looked  at  once  and  direct  to 
the  brazen  serpent,  and  were  healed ;  and  when  we  want 
(renewed)  healing,  we  must  look  again  and  again.     Oh,  the 


THE    EVERLASTING   LOVE    OF   GOD.  275 

precious  fountain  for  sin  and  uncleanness !  I  am  obliged  to 
come  again  and  again  to  it.  May  the  Lord  disperse  every 
dark  cloud  from  your  mind ;  for  well  I  know,  Jesus  loves  not 
to  see  His  child  mourning  in  unbelief.  The  weakness  of  the 
body  often  affects  the  mind  ;  but,  let  what  may  be  our  feelings, 
Jesus'  love  is  always  the  same,  and  the  Lord  changes  not. 
What  I  have  written,  you  know,  beloved  friend,  as  well  as  I 
do.  And  yet  often  when  a  cloud  comes  over  the  mind,  it  is 
the  privilege  of  one  who  is  travelling  in  a  lighter  part  of  the 
road  to  speak  a  word  of  consolation.  Cheer  up,  beloved  of 
God,  it  is  all  right ;  for  God,  even  our  own  God,  is  with  you, 
to  do  you  good  ;  and  every  trial  you  now  meet  with  is  to  make 
you  cling  closer  to  Jesus,  that  you  may  know  Him  better  and 
love  Him  more I  am  fighting  on  my  way,  often  sor- 
rowing and  rejoicing  at  the  same  time, — mourning  for  my  sins, 
w^liile  I  can  and  do  rejoice  that  Christ  has  made  an  all-suffi- 
cient atonement  for  all,  past,  present,  and  to  come;  which, 
while  it  humbles  me  in  the  dust  of  self-abhorrence,  makes  me 
increasingly  long  to  be  like  Him.  Only  believe,  and  it  will  be 
well  with  you  through  time  and  throughout  an  endless  eter- 
nity." 

TO  THE  SAME. THE  EVERLASTING  LOVE  OF  GOD. 

" .  .  .  .  It  is  so  pleasant  to  talk  of  an  absent  friend, — a 
friend  that  one  dearly  loves,  and  longs  to  see  ;  particularly  if 
tlie  person  with  whom  you  are  conversing  is  especially  inter- 
ested in  the  subject.  As  I  sat  musing  alone,  I  thought  of 
Christ,  and  then  of  you  ;  and  as  I  am  too  far  to  hold  a  conver- 
sation, I  must  write  a  little  about  Him  we  both  love  ;  and  we 
love  Him  because  He  first  loved  us.  If  we  feel  one  particle  of 
love  to  Him,  be  assured  it  is  a  proof  that  He  loves  us.  But 
still  there  are  seasons  when  our  hearts  are  so  cold  and  insensi- 
ble, that  it  would  not  do  always  to  have  this  as  a  test  of  His 
love  to  us.  What  a  mercy  of  mercies  to  have  such  a  God  to 
deal  with,  who  cannot  cease  to  love,  because  He  cannot 
change  !  How  much  solid  comfort  is  in  this  thought !  How 
it  quiets  and  soothes  all  our  doubts  and  fears,  and  puts  Satan's 
'  ifs'  to  the  blush !  There  is  no  uncertainty  with  God.  His 
thoughts  of  love  towards  us  have  been  from  everlasting  to 
everlasting.  He  loved  us  when  we  were  wandering  far  from 
Him,  and  fur  from  happiness.  He  loved  us  when  we  knew 
Him  not.     He  loved  us  out  of  vSatan's  kingdom  into  the  king- 


276  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    M  iRY    WINSLOW. 

dom  of  grace,  and  He  will  love  us  into  the  kingdom  of  glory. 
Our  doubts  and  fears  may  harass  us,  but  they  can  make  no 
alteration  in  His  eternal  purposes.  Jesus  is  alive ;  never  fear ! 
He  is  risen  and  at  the  right  hand  of  the  Majesty  of  heaven, 
and  is  tho  executor  of  His  own  will,  entrusting  it  not  to  the 
highest  angel  in  heaven.  Let  us  then  encourage  our  hearts  in 
the  Lord,  and  know  that  w^hile  we  are  looking  to  Jesus,  He  is 
at  that  very  moment  looking  on  us  with  a  heart  overflowing 
wath  love,  as  eternal  as  Himself.  May  He  draw  us  nearer  to 
Himself,  and  conform  us  to  His  own  lovely  image." 

TO  THE  SAME. SPIRITUAL  ENCOURAGEMENT. 

"  .  .  .  .  I  was  rejoiced  to  hear  that  you  were  enabled  (if 
it  was  only  for  a  moment)  to  cast  yourself  upon  Christ.  Be 
assured  the  time  will  come  when  He  wnll  enable  you  to  do  it 
wholly.  He  is  leading  you  by  degrees,  to  see  what  He  is,  and 
what  He  is  to  you ;  and  for  wise  purposes.  He  is  teaching  you 
many  hard  lessons,  that  you  may  be  prepared  to  teach  others ; 
and  thus  He  is  fitting  you  for  future  usefulness.  Let  me  not, 
in  thus  speaking,  put  a  stumbling-block  in  your  w^ay.  There 
is  such  a  fulness  in  the  boundless  love  of  Christ's  heart,  that 
there  is  no  necessity  for  staying  out  of  it  for  one  moment.  It 
was  framed  for  sinners ;  and  there  is  room  enough  for  you,  for 
me,  and  for  ten  thousand  more.  Oh,  let  us  enter  in  at  once 
and  feel  at  home,  no  longer  strangers,  but  at  home  with  a  loving 
Father  and  a  precious  Christ.  This  is  what  I  covet  for  you. 
I  pray  you  may  be  led  to  cease  from  all  teaching  but  that  of 
the  Eternal  Spirit,  and  with  the  word  of  God  in  your  hand. 
May  God  pour  into  your  soul  such  a  sense  of  His  wondrous 
love  for  you,  as  will  enable  you  to  triumph  over  all  the  host  of 
foes  within  and  without.  And  when  you  see  His  holy  face, 
and  can  cast  a  thought  on  me,  oh,  remind  Him  what  a  poor  one 
He  has  in  your  unworthy  sister." 

TO  LADY  L .   ON  ANTICIPATION  OF  HEAVEN. 

"  Beloved  in  the  Lord, —  April  21st. 

"  I  grieve  that  I  was  obhged  to  leave  home  without 
seeing  you  again ;  but  if  we  meet  no  more  on  earth,  there  is  a 
blessed  world  where  I  expect  to  meet  you,  and  all  we  love 
who  have  preceded  us  there.  Let  us  keep  our  eye  and  our 
hearts  upon  it.     Earth  is  but  a  stage  erected  as  our  passage  to 


POWER   OF    CHRIST'S   RESURRECTION.  277 

the  place  Jesus  has  gone  to  prepare  for  us.  And  what  a  place 
must  that  be,  which  Infinite  power  and  love  has  engaged  to 
provide  I  Oh,  let  us  not  lose  sight  of  heaven  for  a  moment. 
How  prone  we  are  to  allow  our  minds  and  hearts  (treacherous 
hearts!)  to  become  entangled  with  the  baubles  of  a  dying 
world.  No  wonder  Christ  exhorted  us  to  icatch  and  pray. 
Heaven  is  our  home — our  happy  home,  We  are  but  strangers 
and  pilgrims  here.  Try  and  realize  it.  Let  us  keep  ourselves 
ready  to  enter  with  Him  to  the  marriage  supper  of  the  Lamb. 
In  a  little  while,  and  we  shall  see  Him,  not  as  the  '  Man  of 
sorrows,'  but  the  'King  in  his  beauty.'  Shall  we  not  know 
Him  the  moment  we  get  there  ?  Shall  we  not  recognise  that 
blessed  countenance,  which  so  often  cheered  and  encouraged  us 
when  cast  down  ?  Dear  friend,  w^e  shall.  Then,  let  us  fight 
against  earth  and  all  its  false  attractions,  for  it  passeth  away. 
Let  us  keep  close  to  Christ ;  go  to  Him  on  all  occasions,  and 
never  be  satisfied  without  an  interview  with  our  best  beloved. 
TVere  the  Queen  to  invite  us  to  visit  her,  and  we  went  to  the 
palace,  but  did  not  see  her,  should  we  return  satisfied  or 
pleased  ?  Just  so  with  the  King  of  kings.  When  we  go  to 
Him,  let  us  not  come  away  without  having  an  interview.  We 
must  speak  to  Him,  open  our  whole  heart  to  Him,  while  He 
opens  His  loving  heart  to  us.  This  is  communion,  and  there 
IS  no  communion  without  it.  May  all  your  children  be  led  to 
choose  the  one  thing  needful.  What  a  mercy  for  a  family  to 
have  a  praying  mother  !     Love,  tender  love  to  you." 

TO    MISS    M .      THE    POWER    OF    CHRISt's    RESURRECTION. 

"  Dear  Sister  ix  Jesus, —  May  4th. 

"  What  shall  I  say  to  you  for  my  apparent  neglect 

of  your  kind  and  considerate  letter,  when  dear was  with 

you?  I  take  shame  to  myself  that  I  have  not  before  thanked 
you  for  it,  and  trust  it  is  not  now  too  late,  .  .  .  God  be 
praised  for  the  precious  Gospel,  which  reveals  to  us  the  whole 
will  of  God.  What  should  we  do  without  the  Bible  ?  and 
what  should  we  do  without  Jesus,  the  source  and  substance  of 
the  Bible  ?  and  what  should  we  do  without  the  Spirit's  holy 
teaching  ?  God  be  praised  for  all ;  all  is  boundless,  f?,^homless 
love,  from  first  to  last.  Dear  friend,  I  have  often  had  you  in 
my  mind  since  I  saw  you  at  Leamington,  and  thought  I  would 
write  and  induce  you  to  tell  me  now  and  then  how  gracious 


278  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

God  was  dealing  with  you.  Pie  is  full  of  love.  No  tongue 
can  tell  how  gracious  He  is  to  unworthy  me  ;  and  is  He  not 
so  to  you,  dear  friend  ?  Could  you  live  without  Him  ?  I  can- 
not. He  is  the  health  and  joy  of  my  soul.  His  name  is  as 
ointment  poured  forth.  What  will  heaven  be,  where  we  shall 
see  Him  face  to  face  ?  Do  you  not  at  times  long  to  be  there,  a 
pure  spirit,  in  due  time  inhabiting  a  glorified  body,  mingling 
with  the  happy  beings,  many  of  whom  we  knew  and  loved, 
around  the  throne  ?  Mighty  are  our  present  privileges.  What 
could  we  do  without  a  throne  of  grace  ?  Do  we  not  need  it 
every  step  Ave  take,  and  at  each  turn  of  Providence  ?  Let  us, 
then,  endeavour,  dear  friend,  to  live  more  on  high, — more  in 
full  expectation  of  our  great  change.  I  believe  that  a  constant 
looking  to  the  glory  that  awaits  us,  will  enable  us  to  live  above 
the  trials  of  the  way ;  will  strengthen  our  faith  to  overcome, 
and  cause  us  to  sit  in  heavenly  ^jlaces  in  Christ  Jesus  ;  realizing 
in  our  soul's  experience,  that  all  is  true  that  our  God  has  told 
us  and  promises  us.  The  resurrection  of  Christ  is  to  me  a 
blessed  confirmation  that  all  else  that  is  revealed  is  true.  If 
Christ  be  risen  from  the  grave  and  is  in  heaven,  then  my  soul 
is  as  safe  as  if  I  were  there  at  this  moment.  Every  other  re- 
vealed truth  rests  upon  this  one ;  and  if  this  is  a  verity,  all 
else  is  so.  Now  we  have  but  to  believe  this,  and  joy  and 
gratitude,  love  and  hope,  at  once  spring  up  in  the  soul.  Then 
comes  the  question,  Lord^  luhat  icouldst  thou  have  me  to  dof 
The  believer  will  not  be  satisfied  with  merely  being  saved. 
Though  this  is  a  great  mercy,  there  yet  are  enjoyments,  I  do 
believe,  experienced  as  we  travel  onward  in  the  heavenly 
journey,  that  far, — oh,  how  far  ! — surpass  the  paltry  glory  of 
this  poor  passing  world ;  experienced  only  by  those  who  are 
united  to  the  living  Vine.  May  the  Lord  help  you  to  go  for- 
ward, to  know  more  and  more  of  the  power  of  His  resurrec- 
tion,— to  follow  on  to  know  the  Lord.  The  more  we  have  to 
do  with  Christ  the  more  we  shall  know  of  His  excellencies, 
His  sympathy,  and  His  exquisite,  boundless  love.  Pray  for 
me,  that  I  may  be  more  anxious  to  press  forward,  and  not  be 
satisfied  to  know  these  things  in  theory  only,  but  in  my  soul's 
sweet  experience.  In  a  little  while,  and  we  shall  be  there.  I 
believe,  from  the  signs  of  the  times,  we  may  hope  soon  to  see 
Him  whom  we  love,  coming  in  the  clouds  of  heaven,  to  take 
His  weary  Church  to  Himself.  Think  of  me  when  waiting 
before  our  mutual  Friend." 


FORESHADOWING  OF  THE  COMING  GLORY.    279 

to  mrs.  t .     jesus  with  his  saints  in  sickness. 

"  My  dear  Friend, — 

"  I  hear  from  dear  E ,  that  your  dear  husband  is 

very  ill.  Perhaps  this  illness  is  not  unto  death,  and  that  he 
will  yet  be  spared  to  you,  and  you  to  him,  a  little  longer  in 
this  vale  of  tears.  But  oh,  when  faith  is  in  lively  exercise, 
how  sweet  is  the  thought  of  going  home ;  dropping  the  weary, 
worn  out  body  for  a  season,  in  full  confidence  of  one  day  being 
united  to  it  again !  How  kind  it  was  in  Jesus  to  give  us  that 
promise  from  His  own  dear  lips,  /  will  raise  it  up  again  at  the 
last  day  !  That  identically  same  body ;  but  oh,  how  changed, 
how  beautified !  Then  soul  and  body  in  re-union  shall  stand 
before  a  holy  Lord  God,  and  Christ  shall  fully  see  and  perfectly 
enjoy  the  travail  of  His  soul.  Tell  him  that  all  that  Jesus  has 
said  is  true ;  that  He  is  in  heaven  who  died  for  sinners ;  and 
that  no  believing  soul,  however  great  his  sins,  can  be  lost  while 
Christ  lives.  He  has  said  to  him.  Because  I  live,  ye  shall  live 
also.  The  same  Jesus  who,  a  poor  and  despised  Man  of  sor- 
rows, trod  the  streets  of  Jerusalem,  is  in  heaven,  as  full  of 
goodness,  tenderness,  and  love,  as  when  here  below.  He  is 
now  with  you,  and  is  watching  beside  the  sick-bed  of  your 
dear  husband,  saying  to  him,  '  Fear  not,  it  is  I.  It  is  I  that 
lived  for  you,  that  died  for  you,  that  rose  again  for  you,  and 
am  now  waiting  to  w^elcome  you  home.  I  have  prepared  a 
place  for  you.'  Absent  from  the  body,  we  shall  be  present 
with  the  Lord.  When  his  eyes  close  on  earth,  at  that  very 
instant  he  will  open  them  upon  Jesus  Himself.  Comfort  him 
with  these  precious  truths.     May  God  be  with  you." 

TO  THE  SAME. FORESHADOWING  OF  THE  COMING  GLORY. 

"  April  13th. 
" .  .  .  .  We  must  not  lose  sight  of  each  other,  for  the  time 
is  shortening.  The  present  signs  speak  loudly  to  us.  Prepare 
to  meet  thy  God!  But  oh,  what  a  pleasant  prospect  is  before 
us,  almost  in  full  view.  Jesus  is  at  hand,  and  if  He  does  not 
soon  come  to  us,  we  shall  soon  go  to  Him,  our  best  and  dear- 
est Friend.  Oh,  to  see  His  face,  once  so  wearied  and  care- 
worn, traced  with  sorrow  and  with  grief, — and  that  because 
our  sins  were  laid  upon  Him, — but  now  resplendent  v/ith 
glory ;  His  countenance  beaming  w^ith  ineffable  delight  upon 
His  redeemed,  blood-bought  family,  rescued  from  the  power  of 


280  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

hell,  death,  and  the  grave.  Can  we  conceive  of  anything  to 
equal  such  a  scene  ?  The  Bridegroom  rejoicing  over  his  bride, 
saints  singing,  angels  admiring.  Endeavour  to  realize  this, 
dear  friend.  Take  your  walks  in  the  good  land  flowing  with 
milk  and  honey.  I  am  never  so  happy  as  when  I  am  able  so 
to  do.  To  hold  converse  with  spirits  around  the  throne ;  above 
all,  with  Him  who  sits  upon  it.  Nothing  in  this  fading  world 
can  equal  it.  A  throne  of  grace,  with  a  broken  heart  for  sin, 
and  a  pardoning  Saviour,  is  a  verdant  spot  in  this  wilder- 
ness. .  .  ." 

to  mrs.  a .     on  the  confession  of  sin. 

"  Dear  Sister  in  the  Lord, — 

" .  .  .  .  AA^hile  I  recommend  this  dear  Christian  friend,  as 
a  companion,  sweet  it  is  to  think  how  soon,  how  very  soon,  we 
shall  be  fitted  for  the  companionship  of  Jesus  Himself,  behold- 
ing Him  in  all  His  unveiled  beauties.  Does  not  the  thought 
often  gladden  your  heart,  and  fill  your  eyes  with  tears  of  joy, 
and  holy  contrition  for  sin?  I  cannot  conceive  of  holy  joy 
unaccompanied  with  godly  sorrow.  Confession  of  sin  should 
make  up  one -half  of  our  lives.  Only  achiowledge  thine 
iniquity.  And  when  we  remember  that  we  have  to  do  with 
One  so  willing  and  so  able  to  pardon,  it  becomes  then  a 
mingled  feeling  of  pleasure  and  pain.  By  confessing  sin,  we 
gather  strength  to  resist  it ;  thereby  the  enemy  of  our  souls 
is  foiled,  the  conscience  is  kept  tender,  the  heart  is  sanctified, 
and  the  blood  of  Jesus  becomes  increasingly  precious.  Let 
us  constantly  flee  to  the  cleansing  fountain ;  for  if  we  say 
loe  have  no  sin,  tve  deceive  ourselves,  and  the  truth  is  not  in  us. 
If  ive  confess  our  sins.  He  is  faithful  and  just  to  forgive 
us  our  sins,  and  to  cleanse  us  from  all  unrighteousness.  Oh, 
to  go  and  acknowledge  the  hidden,  concealed  evil  of  our  hearts 
— that  sin  that  no  eye  has  seen  or  can  see  but  God's  holy  eye. 
Is  not  this  a  high  privilege  ?  And  who  can  subdue  sin  in  us 
but  Jesus  ?  I  might  as  well  attempt  to  remove  mountains,  as 
to  reason  away  one  corruption  of  my  fallen  nature.  But  if  we, 
the  moment  we  detect  it,  carry  it  to  Jesus,  He  will  do  it  all 
for  us.  This  is  one  of  the  most  difficult  lessons  to  learn  in  the 
school  of  Christ.  I  am  but  just  beginning  to  learn  it,  and 
therefore  I  am  placed  in  the  youngest  class,  travelling  to  Jesus 
more  as  a  little  helpless  child,  for  Him  to  do  all  for  and  all  in 
me.     My  fancied  strength  is  all  vanished,  my  boasted  rea^son 


GRATEFUL   REVIEWS.  281 

turned  into  follj,  and  now,  thus  living  on  Christ  in  childhke 
siraphcity,  my  peace,  joy,  and  consolation,  are  past  expression. 
Oh,  the  love,  the  matchless  love  of  Jesus  to  a  poor  sinner  ly- 
ing thus  at  His  dear  feet,  waiting  to  receive  a  welcoming  smile 
beaming  from  His  countenance.  Dear  friend,  keep  close  to 
Him.  Let  not  the  world  or  its  cares  come  between  you  and 
Christ.  If  there  is  a  cloud,  rest  not  until  it  Avithdraws.  Go 
again  and  again,  should  there  be  but  a  shade,  until  it  is  put 
away,  and  you  see  Him  who  loves  you.  I  think,  if  it  were 
possible  to  be  sensible  of  shame  in  heaven,  we  should  be 
ashamed  of  our  sins, — above  every  other,  of  the  sin  of  unbelief. 
.  .  .  You  may,  perhaps,  wonder  why  confession  of  sin  should 
be  the  subject  upon  which  I  have  chiefly  written,  I  had  just 
returned,  when  I  took  up  my  pen  to  address  you,  from  my 
cojifessional — the  throne  of  grace — so  sweetly  refreshed  and  so 
blessedly  pardoned,  that  I  could  not  refrain  from  recommend- 
ing it  to  all  I  love  and  write  to,  as  one  of  the  most  hallowed 
exercises  of  the  Christian.  I  often  repair  to  it  heavily  laden, 
and  return  as  though  nestling  beneath  the  wing  of  the  Saviour. 
I  tell  Him  all  that  is  in  my  heart,  and  what  I  could  not  tell 
the  dearest  friend  on  earth.  He  keeps  all  my  secrets ;  and 
while  I  open  my  sinful  heart  to  Him,  He  unveils  His  loving, 
gracious  heart  to  me.  This  truly  happy  intercourse  with  God, 
I  would  urge  upon  all  whom  I  love,  and  who  love  Him. 
Nothing  must  be  kept  back.  Descending  to  particulars,  we 
must  deal  with  God  in  small  as  well  as  in  great  matters.  One 
lifting  up  of  the  heart — one  thought  darting  heavenward,  when 
surrounded  by  clouds,  is  sufficient  for  Jesus.  Lord,  help  us  so 
to  live  and  so  to  die." 

TO    MRS.    R .       GRATEFUL    REVIEWS. 

"  Dear  Friend, —  October  5th,  1852. 

"  My  own  dear  pastor,  Mr.  Evans,  has  often  said  to  me, 
'  Dear  sister,  what  a  poor  world  it  is  !'  And  such  I  find  it  in- 
creasingly. We  shall  soon  be  gathering  up  our  garments  in 
preparation,  I  trust,  for  a  better.  What  folly  to  wish  to  stay 
in  a  wilderness  longer  than  is  needful.  You  and  I  are  daily 
Hearing  our  heavenly  home,  and  Jesus  stands  ready  to  put  us 
in  full  possession  of  our  glorious  inheritance,  prepared  for  us 
before  the  foundation  of  the  world.  With  adoring  gratitude  I 
look  back  on  all  the  way  He  has  led  me,  and  stand  in  wonder- 
ing praise  at  His  long-suffering  patience,  gentleness,  kindness, 


282  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

and  forbearance.  My  heart  seems  ready  to  melt  into  contri- 
tion in  view  of  the  ten  thousand,  thousand  sins,  wilful  and 
aggravating,  that  I  have  committed  against  Him,  who  loved 
me  with  an  everlasting  love,  and  with  loving-kindness  drew 
me  to  Himself,  I  think,  were  it  possible,  there  would  be  weep- 
ing in  heaven.  But  not  so.  My  tears  will  be  wiped  away 
there.  Repentance  is  not  a  thing  to  be  once  done  and  then 
done  with.  Not  so.  The  more  I  see  of  Jesus,  the  more  He 
opens  to  me  His  loving  heart,  the  deeper  is  the  sorrow  for  sin. 
I  lie  down  in  the  dust  of  His  feet  closer  than  ever  I  did  be- 
fore. I  can  truly  say,  I  abhor  myself  in  dust  and  ashes  before 
Him.  Sins  of  early  days  are  brought  before  me  as  if  just  com- 
mitted— over  them  I  weep.  As  I  get  nearer  the  land  of  glory, 
the  light  dawning  from  thence  shows  more  vividly  the  dark- 
ness within,  and  the  hatefulness  of  that  which  crucified  the 
Lord  of  life  and  glory.  I  am  nearing  day  by  day  my  heaven- 
ly inheritance.  It  seems  at  times  almost  in  view.  It  is  but  a 
step,  and  I  am  there.  I  am  led  often  to  live  [as  it  were]  my 
life  over  again ;  and  how  plainly  do  I  see  now  the  why  and 
the  wherefore  He  dealt  with  me,  in  leading  me  through  trials 
and  tribulations.  How  good  is  the  Lord !  At  present  my 
feelings  are  blended.  I  rejoice  while  I  weep.  Oh,  there  is 
none  like  Jesus  in  earth  or  in  heaven,  I  sometimes  long  to 
be  there,  I  am  quite  sure  the  nearer  we  get  to  glory,  the  at- 
mosphere becomes  clearer,  and  we  can  see  afar  off,  Stephen, 
when  departing,  saw  Him  standing  at  the  right  hand  of  God, 
ready  to  welcome  His  first  martyr  home,  Wliat  will  heaven 
be  !  Let  us  live  more  in  preparation  for  it,  and  realize  it  more 
than  we  do.  I  find  nothing  so  keeps  the  heart  right,  as  hav- 
ing constant  communication  with  Christ.  .  .  .  As  soon  as  we 
are  born  again,  He  puts  us  to  school,  the  Holy  Ghost  being 
our  teacher ;  and  many  hard  lessons  we  have  to  learn.  Some 
of  us  are  dull  scholars,  and  require  to  learn  the  same  lessons 
over  and  over  again,  and  often  need  the  rod.  The  hardest 
task  we  have  to  study  is  ourselves.  Another  lesson  is,  to  hun- 
ger and  thirst  for  more,  not  satisfied  witli  what  we  do  know, 
but  to  follow  on  to  know  more  of  the  matchless  love  that  there 
is  in  the  Jieart  of  Jesus,  And  this,  I  believe,  we  shall  be 
learning  out  through  eternity,  and  never  come  to  the  end  of  it. 
Oh,  let  us  hold  fast  our  oneness  with  Christ !  And  not  only 
pray,  but  go  not  away  without  an  answer.  The  blessed  spirit 
who  indites  the  prayer,  responds  to  it,  and  thus  we  know  we 
have  the  ear  of  God." 


ENTERING   FULLY   INTO    CHRIST.  283 

to  mrs.  w on  entering  fully  into  christ. 

"Dear  Friend, — 

"  ,  .  .  .  Many  years  have  I  laboured  with  you, 
and  yet  you  have  not  arrived  at  the  state  in  which  I  have  long 
wished  to  see  you — full  of  the  Holy  Ghost  and  of  joy.  And 
why  is  it  ?  What  hinders  ?  All  things  are  ready — the  table 
is  spread — Christ  invites  you.  There  is  everything  in  the  gos- 
pel to  fill  you  with  gladness  and  joy,  above  all  with  real  happi- 
ness, such  as  this  poor  world  knows  nothing  of.  This  is  what 
I  covet  for  myself  and  for  all  God's  redeemed  ones.  It  is  a 
mercy  and  a  great  one,  to  know  that  we  are  saved ;  but  this 
is  only  the  beginning  of  blessings.  Greater  blessings  await  us 
journeying  through  the  wilderness  to  the  land  of  glory.  Sup- 
pose we  have  faith  in  Christ,  and  a  good  hope  through  grace, 
this  is  but  the  first  round  in  that  ladder  that  reaches  from  earth 
to  heaven.  We  are  to  ascend  higher  and  higher,  always 
looking  upward,  never  downward,  lest  we  become  dizzy  and 
fall.  Oh,  it  is  only  looking  to  Jesus  that  keeps  us  ascending. 
They  go  from  strength  to  strength^  every  one  of  them  in  Zion  ap- 
peareth  before  God.  As  I  have  often  said  before,  we  cannot 
be  stationary  in  the  divine  life — we  are  advancing  or  receding. 
It  must  be  one  way  or  the  other.  How  many,  dear  I  believe 
to  Christ,  do  I  find,  who,  after  years  of  profession,  are  just  in 
the  same  spot  at  which  they  set  out !  They  know  no  more  of 
Christ  than  they  did  at  the  first.  Now  in  worldly  things  this 
would  not  be  so.  But,  oh,  when  such  riches  await  us — honour, 
glory,  and  immortality — how  diligent  and  earnest  should  we 
be  to  make  progress  in  the  way,  and  so  glorify  our  God ! 
Every  stage  on  the  road  brings  us  nearer  to  our  happy  home. 
Oh,  the  joy  of  soon  being  with  Jesus  !  Heaven  is  very  near. 
The  eternal  world  is  all  around  us.  Oh,  to  realize  this  con- 
tinually !  We  do  not  dwell  sufficiently  on  these  glorious 
realities ;  we  do  not  bring  them  home  to  ourselves.  We  are 
either  too  much  engaged  with  earthly  things,  or  are  looking 
more  within  the  dark  recesses  of  our  hearts,  than  to  the  glory 
that  awaits  us,  and  into  the  possession  of  which  we  might  be 
any  moment  introduced. 

"  In  studying  the  prophecies,  there  might  be  much  benefit 
in  our  researches,  if  we  found  more  of  Jesus.  It  is  the  looking 
to  Jesus — the  going  to  Jesus — the  confession  of  sins  to  Jesus 
— the  constant  application  of  His  blood — disclosing  to  Him  all 
we  fear,  all  we  doubt,  all  we  hope,  all  that  is  in  our  hearts, 


284  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

which,  dear  friend,  I  would  have  you  cultivate.  Let  nothing 
come  between  you  and  your  best  Friend,  Never  forget,  you 
and  Christ  are  one — one  in  time  and  one  in  eternity.  The 
world,  and  all  its  riches,  glories,  and  honours,  is  as  dross  when 
compared  with  the  blessedness  of  our  union  with  Jesus.  Do 
not  be  satisfied  unless  in  prayer  you  have  the  presence  of  God. 
Rest  not  in  mere  prayer.  I  must  feel  that  I  have  the  ear  of 
God  when  I  draw  near  to  Him ;  and  when  I  have  not  a  sense 
of  His  presence,  I  am  not  hajDpy  ;  and  I  go  again  and  again, 
until  He  lifts  up  upon  me  the  sweet  light  of  His  countenance  ; 
and  if  ever  I  have  had  the  broken  and  the  contrite  heart,  it  has 
been  when  He  most  shone  into  my  soul.  Oh,  the  wondrous 
condescension  of  our  God!  He  does  even  now  leave  the 
heavens  and  come  down  to  bless  us.  How  boundless  is  the 
love  of  God  to  the  feeblest  of  His  little  ones  !  Excuse  all  my 
mistakes.  I  write  thus  in  haste,  and  I  am  as  busy  as  an  old 
woman  of  seventy  eight  can  be.  My  tender  love  to  your  hus- 
band. May  you  both  grow  daily  in  grace,  and  in  the  knowl- 
edge of  Christ." 

TO  THE  SAME. ON  HEARING  THE  VOICE  OF  JESUS. 

" .  .  .  .  Do  you  think  that  you  have  sought  the  Lord  all 
these  years,  and  that  He  has  not  heard  you  ?  But,  you  will 
reply,  '  He  has  not  answered  me.'  Well,  that  is  your  fault, 
and  not  His.  You  have  been  looking  within  yourself,  instead 
of  looking  full  at  Jesus.  He,  who  was  once  a  poor  despised 
Man  of  sorrows,  is  now  risen  from  the  dead,  and  having  paid 
the  full  penalty  of  your  sins  and  mine,  is  now  ready  to  hear 
your  plea,  and  to  send  into  your  soul  a  full  sense  of  pardon. 
Wrestle  with  Him  until  He  answers.  Jesus  will  speak,  and 
speak  comfortably  to  you.  Once  I  pleaded  with  Him,  and  I 
did  not  rest  until  He  said,  '  I  am  thy  salvation.'  I  went  to  my 
bed  unconverted ;  I  rose  in  the  morning  a  saved  sinner — an 
adopted  child  of  God.  I  never  closed  my  eyes  to  sleep  until 
Jesus  spoke  peace  to  my  longing  heart.  Oh,  how  sweet  and 
how  wonderful  was  the  voice  of  Christ  to  my  soul !  And  this 
voice  I  have  heard  again  and  again  since  then.  When  in  deep 
trouble,  often  has  He  spoken  words  of  comfort  and  rich  con- 
solation, allayed  my  fears,  and  soothed  my  sorrows.  Oh,  such 
a  Jesus  is  He  !  He  cannot  but  hear  you,  and  cause  you  to 
hear  Him.  His  love  transcends  the  united  love  of  all  crea 
tures,  as  the  Infinite  exceeds  the  finite.     Do  not  rest  without 


A.    WORD    IN    SEASON.  285 

a  sense  of  it.  On  my  knees  this  morning,  I  had  such  a  blessed 
interview  with  the  Saviour  of  sinners,  as  I  would  not  exchange 
for  a  thousand  interviews  with  all  the  kings  of  the  earth.  The 
Spirit  seemed  to  bring  you  so  fresh  to  my  mind  afterwards, 
that  I  could  not  help  again  urging  you,  in  the  dear,  loving 
name  of  Jesus,  not  to  stop  short  of  this  blessing,  that  you  too 
may  be  enabled  to  say,  ^  I  sought  the  Lord,  and  He  heard  me, 
and  saved  me  from  all  my  fears.''  I  find  confession  of  sin — sins 
of  heart,  lip,  life — a  season  of  penitential  communion  with  Jesus, 
and  a  time  of  refreshing  from  the  Lord.  He  loves  to  hear 
your  voice.  He  waits  to  be  gracious.  Think  of  Christ  wait- 
ing and  listening  to  hear  your  voice  pleading  with  Him.  Jesus 
never  turns  away  from  the  broken-hearted  sinner,  and  never 
can.  "When  you  hear  the  precious  voice  of  Jesus,  you  must 
let  me  know.  '  My  sheej)  hear  my  voice.^  You  cannot  mistake 
it.  Read  the  Psalms  of  David.  David's  God  is  the  same  as 
He  was  in  David's  time.  '/,  the  Lord,  change  not.^  Deal  with 
Him  as  such,  and  rest  not  until  you  can  say,  '  He  has  spoken 
peace  to  my  soul.' 

'  My  soul,  ask  what  thou  wilt, 

Thou  canst  not  be  too  bold. 
Since  for  thy  sake  His  blood  was  spilt, 

What  else  will  He  withhold  ? ' 

TO  THE  REV.  J.  H.  E .       A  WORD  IN  SEASON  TO  A  PASTOR 

IN  ILLNESS. 

"  Beloved  Brother, — 

"  Has  He  who  is  all  love,  nothing  but  love  to  you  and 
to  me,  again  laid  that  loving  hand  upon  you,  and  taken  you 
aside  for  a  little  season,  that  He  might  converse  with  you 
alone  ;  that  He  might  show  you  more  privately  what  is  in  His 
heart,  and  lead  you  deeper  and  deeper  into  that  mine  of  un- 
fathomable wealth  that  is  in  store  for  you  and  me,  and  all  that 
are  His  own  elect  ?  Oh,  what  a  God  is  ours !  how  gracious, 
how  mighty  in  all  His  dealings  with  us !  And  has  He  not  to 
do  with  us  moment  by  moment  ?  His  dear  loving  eye  is  upon 
you  in  your  sick  chamber,  in  your  retirement.  Who  can  sepa- 
rate you  from  Christ  ?  not  from  his  love  only,  but  from  Him- 
self. He  is  in  you,  and  you  are  in  Him — a  partaker  of  His 
nature ;  one  with  Him,  through  time  and  through  eternity. 
Blessed  thought !  Oh,  to  live  for  Him  and  Him  only  !  Jesus 
is  watching  over  you  with  the  tenderest  sympathy,  such  sym- 
pathy as  mortals  know  nothing  of.     He  is  now  most  kindly, 


286  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

most  mercifully  dealing  with  you.  He  has  some  communica- 
tions to  make  to  your  soul,  be  assured,  which  can  be  done  in 
no  other  way.  So  the  Lord  works  with  His  beloved  ones. 
In  a  little  while,  and  we  shall  be  with  Him,  see  and  love  Him 
as  we  now  desire,  but  cannot.  And  yet  we  might  have  more 
of  heaven  below  than  we  have.  If  we  had  more  constant 
dealings  with  Him  than  we  have,  how  much  more  real  happi- 
ness should  we  experience  !  To  be  loith  Jesus  is  heaven  below 
and  above.  Heaven  itself  would  be  no  heaven  to  me  if  He 
were  not  there.  No,  though  all  I  loved  on  earth  were  there, 
and  He  not,  it  were  no  heaven  to  me,  nor  you  either,  beloved 
brother.  The  presence  of  our  God  will  make  that  place  of 
bliss  all  that  it  ever  will  be  to  us  throughout  an  endless  eter- 
nity ;  and  when  I  think  how  near  we  are,  and  how  soon  we 
may  be  there,  how  trifling  does  all  the  glory  of  the  world  ap- 
pear !  Oh,  to  live  on  high ;  to  get  closer  and  closer  to  Jesus, 
and  see  in  a  Father's  heart  all  that  the  feeblest  of  His  tender 
weaklings  can  desire !  Dear  brother,  the  Lord  has  brought 
me  to  live  more  as  a  helpless  infant  upon  Him  day  by  day, 
and  so  enter  more  fully  into  that  truth,  Without  Me  ye  can  do 
nothing.  How  sweetly  does  the  spirit  work  in  us  after  truth ; 
and  although  we  need  and  acknowledge  it,  yet  it  is  only  by  deep 
experience  and  by  the  mighty  power  of  the  Holy  Spirit  we 
are  effectually  taught.  Dear  brother,  you  know  all  this  a 
thousand  times  better  than  I  can  tell  you ;  but  still  it  is  a  com- 
fort to  speak  together  of  Christ's  doings,  and  the  Avay  He  takes 
with  us.  There  is  not  a  circumstance  but  infinite  wisdom  and 
love  are  in  it.  Christ  is  in  the  furnace  with  you  now,  and  not 
a  hair  of  your  head  shall  be  injured.  He  is  at  your  side  mo- 
ment by  moment,  and  you  shall  see  the  wherefore  He  has  laid 
you  aside  from  your  pleasant  work.  May  you  listen  and  hear 
what  the  Lord  would  say  unto  you  in  this  providence.  There 
is  a  voice.  It  is  not  in  the  strong  wind,  it  is  not  in  the  earth- 
quake, it  is  not  in  the  fire.  It  is  the  '  still  small  voice'  of  our 
Jehovah-Jesus,  that  w^ill  sweetly,  blessedly  speak  to  your  soul. 
The  voice  of  His  Spirit  within.  When  He  speaks  comfort, 
who  can,  what  can  give  disquietude  ?  When  Jesus  speaks,  all 
is  hushed  into  silence ;  for  there  is  no  voice  like  His.  Is  He 
not  the  same  who  spake  to  Abraham,  to  Isaac,  to  Jacob,  and 
to  Moses  in  the  wilderness ;  and  who  tabernacled  in  the  flesh 
for  a  season  here  below  ?  Is  He  not  the  same  who  spoke  to 
Saul  of  Tarsus,  after  his  resurrection,  and  who  stood  by  him  in 


THE  LORD  THE  REFUGE  IN  THE  STORM.     287 

the  storm,  to  encourage  his  heart  ?  And  is  He  not  the  same 
to  you  and  to  me  now  ?  I  feel  He  is  the  same,  and  I  desire 
to  go  to  Him  as  such,  expecting  great  things,  since  He  is  a 
great  God  and  a  great  Saviour.  Therefore  He  savs,  Open  thy 
mouth  wide,  and  I  loill  fill  it.  I  fear  I  may  weary  you,  though 
I  could  write  a  volume  on  the  subject.  Precious,  precious 
Jesus,  bless,  oh,  bless  my  beloved  brother ;  heal  him,  and  lift 
up  upon  him  the  light  of  Thy  countenance,  and  draw  him 
nearer  and  nearer  to  Thyself. 

TO  HER  SON. THE  LORD  THE  REFUGE  IN  THE  STORM. 

"I  wrote  to  you,  that  I  have  had  for  several  days  a  sore 
conflict,  greatly  tried  by  sin  within,  and  by  cross-providences 
without.  I  was  in  a  storm,  and  had  no  more  power  to  guide 
it  than  an  infant  conflicting  with  a  giant.  I  went  to  my  strong- 
hold again  and  again.  I  felt  that  Christ  could  do  it.  I  lay 
prostrate  at  His  feet,  pleading  the  promises  as  flist  as  the  Holy 
Ghost  brought  them  to  me.  In  a  short  time  afterwards  I  was 
placed  just  in  that  position  that  was  the  most  trying ;  but  all 
was  calm,  peace,  and  quietness.  It  was  the  Lord,  Oh,  how 
grateful  I  felt !  I  retired  to  my  room,  to  thank  the  Lord  for 
His  goodness.  He  tried  my  faith,  and  at  last  brought  me 
down  powerless  at  His  feet,  who  has  said,  All  power  is  Mine, 
in  heaven  and  on  earth.  By  these  things  we  are  taught  experi- 
mentally wherein  our  great  strength  lies.  Mere  head-knowl- 
edge will  do  no  good.  The  Lord  is  the  helper  of  His  people, 
and  there  is  no  other.  Thus  the  Holy  Ghost  works  in  the 
souls  of  the  redeemed.  Precious  Jesus  !  Thou  art  that  Friend 
that  sticketh  closer  than  a  brother,  or  the  tenderest  and  dearest 
object  on  earth.  I  was  led  this  morning  to  reason  with  the 
Lord  in  His  own  words.  Without  Me  ye  can  do  nothing.  If 
you  have  ever  beheld  a  vessel  in  a  fearful  storm,  followed  by 
a  sudden  calm,  you  can  fancy  my  situation.  The  Lord  be 
praised  for  His  goodness.  My  soul  desires  to  give  Him  the 
glory." 

to  mrs.  lieut.-colonel  p b ,  india, on  keeping 

an  open  heart  with  god. 
"Dear,  very  dear  Friend, — 

"  Through  the  kindness  of  dear  Mr.  C ,  I  have 

obtained  your  address,  and  a  kind  message  from  you.  Thus 
does  the  Lord  unite  His  own  family  in  the  blessed  bonds  of 


288  MEMOIR   OP   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW 

Christian  love.  Oh,  may  this  be  to  us  a  sweet  earnest  that 
this  union,  commenced  in  the  wilderness,  will  continue  through- 
out a  blessed  eternity !  Since  I  last  saw  you,  we  have  made 
some  rapid  strides  towards  the  haven  of  rest.  I  trust,  if  we 
meet  no  more  in  this  vale  of  tears,  we  shall  meet  there.  There 
will  be  no  wide  ocean  to  separate  the  one  dear  family  of  God, 
and  we  shall  know  as  we  are  known.  There  will  be  perfect 
knowledge,  perfect  purity,  perfect  love.  Oh,  may  a  view  of 
the  blessings  awaiting  us  encourage  our  hearts  to  press  on  to 
know  more  and  more  of  the  power  of  the  Lord's  resurrection 
in  our  souls !  By  faith  are  we  saved,  through  the  finished 
work  of  Jesus  Christ ;  and  if  the  Holy  Ghost  has  taken  pos- 
session of  our  hearts,  we  shall  manifest  it  by  a  holy  walk  and  con- 
versation before  a  gainsaying  world.  Oh,  that  you  may  follow 
on  to  know  more  and  more  of  the  truth  as  it  is  in  Jesus !  Be 
not  satisfied  with  your  present  measure  of  faith.  Press  on  for 
m.ore.  Greater  things  await  you.  Jesus  stands  ready  to 
bestow  all  you  need,  all  you  ask.  When  you  go  to  Jesus  to 
make  known  your  requests,  go  in  the  expectancy  of  prayer. 
The  importunate  prayer  will  meet  with  an  answer.  Lord^  Thou 
hast  heard  the  desire  of  the  humble;  Thou  wilt  prepare  their  heart; 
Thou  toilt  cause  thine  ear  to  hear.  Psa.  x.  17.  When  I  go  to 
the  throne  of  grace,  I  cannot  be  satisfied  unless  I  feel  I  have 
the  ear  of  God.  I  cannot  be  happy  if  I  have  not  communion 
with  Him  my  soul  loveth.  Perhaps  you  will  reply,  *  But  I  do 
not  know  or  feel  that  I  love  God.'  Well,  go  and  tell  Jesus 
that.  If  your  heart  appears  cold,  hard,  and  insensible,  take  it 
to  Jesus,  and  tell  Him  how  it  is  with  you.  He  wnll  warm, 
soften,  and  fill  it  with  His  love.  Go,  under  all  circumstances, 
and  tell  Him  all  you  feel,  and  all  you  do  not  feel.  Oh,  keep 
an  open  heart  with  the  Saviour  of  sinners!  Make  sure  of 
heaven.  Let  nothing  of  an  earthly  nature  come  between  you 
and  it.  Let  it  be  your  chief  w^ork,  and  occupy  your  best 
thoughts.  Look  not  behind,  but  press  forward,  and  Christ  will 
give  you  life  and  love,  joy  and  peace  in  believing.  Keep  close 
to  Jesus,  for  He  is  your  life.  In  all  your  fears,  failures,  and 
discouragements,  go  to  Him,  and  tell  Him  all.  Oh,  live  for 
eternity!  Realize  your  adoption  into  God's  family.  Never 
rest  until  you  know  you  are  born  of  God.  Go  again  and  again 
until  He  answers  your  prayer,  and  satisfies  you  on  this  all-im- 
portant point.  I  sought  the  Lord^  and  He  heard  me.  There 
must  be  first  union,  and  then  communion.     I  hasten  to  conclude. 


LETTER   OF    CHRISTIAN    CONDOLENCE.  289 

Oh,  that  I  might  meet  jou  in  heaven !  My  journey  on  earth 
cannot  now  be  much  longer.  Jesus  is  ready  to  receive  me, 
and  my  prospect  at  times  is  bright  and  glorious.  I  shall  know 
you  then.  Perfect  knowledge  we  shall  then  have.  Heaven 
is  worth  living  for,  and  it  is  worth  dying  for.  I  commend  the 
loving  Saviour  to  you.  He  is  all  that  He  says  He  is.  His 
heart  is  ever  towards  you,  and  His  eye  is  ever  upon  you." 

"Dec.  19,  185L 
To  the  >Sa??ie.— "Deeply  has  my  heart  felt  for  you,  my  dear, 
widowed  friend,  since  I  heard  how  the  Lord  had  dealt  with 
you  in  removing  your  dear  husband.  I  know  what  that 
widowed  heart  feels,  from  having  passed  through  the  same 
myself  while  in  a  strange  land.  I  do  feel  for  you ;  though, 
long  before  this  reaches  you,  I  trust  the  Lord  has  comforted 
your  soul  with  the  consolation  which  He  alone  can  impart. 
All  these  things  are  to  lead  you  to  Himself;  and  He  says  now 
to  you,  '  Daughter,  give  me  thy  heart.  I  have  taken  thy  hus- 
band, but  I  will  be  unto  thee  better  than  ten  husbands,  for  I 
am  the  Husband  of  the  widow.  Look  unto  Me,  and  be  saved 
from  all  your  fears.'  I  have  heard  no  particulars  of  your  sad 
bereavement,  and  write  at  a  venture.  Should  you  return  to 
this  country,  how  much  I  should  like  to  see  you  once  more ! 
The  Lord  is  still  keeping  me  here,  and  preparing  me  for  the 
great  change  from  earth  to  heaven.  Who  would  not  be  a 
Christian?  Dear  friend,  I  do  trust  that  this  heavy  affliction 
has  brought  you  nearer  to  Jesus,  and  that  you  can  now  say, 
'  He  is  my  Saviour  and  my  God.'  The  Lord  does  nothing  in 
vain.  All  His  dispensations  are  intended  to  awaken  us  to  a  full 
and  just  sense  of  our  responsibilities,  and  of  our  accountability  to 
Him.  He  has  made  us,  and  made  us  for  Himself;  and  what  a 
mercy  to  be  brought  to  know  this,  and  to  turn  to  the  Lord ! 
He  loves  us  too  well  unnecessarily  to  afflict  us.  Nestle  now 
under  His  loving,  protecting  wing.  Get  close  to  Jesus.  Open 
all  your  heart  to  Him.  His  ear  is  open  to  all  your  requests. 
Take  Him  as  your  Husband,  Brother,  Friend,  Counsellor,  and 
present  Help  in  every  time  of  trouble.  I  have  had  you  much 
in  my  thoughts  and  in  my  heart.  If  you  can,  drop  me  a  line. 
I  may  not  be  long  here.  Jesus,  the  very  same  Jesus  that  once 
was  on  earth,  is  waiting  to  welcome  all  who  seek  and  love  Him 
here  into  the  realms  of  eternal  blessedness.  No  more  tears 
there — no  more  sorrow — no  more  sin ;  all  glory  begun  and 
13 


290  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

never  ending.  Make  your  calling  and  election  sure ;  and  en- 
deavour to  induce-  others  to  come  to  Jesus,  and  partake  of  the 
same  mighty  blessings.  Farewell!  If  you  see  the  dear 
C s,  give  my  love  to  them  both." 

TO  THE  HON.  F.  T ,   ON  MAKING  SURE  OF  SALVATION. 

"My  dear  Friend,—  Leamington,  March  9,  1853. 

"  TVe  are  still  journeying  onward,  but  ivhere?  is  the 
question.  Is  it  not  a  solemn  thought  ?  Should  we  not  examine 
well  our  chart  and  the  way-marks,  to  see  if  we  are  in  the  right 
way  ?  Should  this  be  left  to  an  uncertainty  by  a  wise  man  ? 
Again  I  repeat  the  solemn  truth,  we  are  on  an  eventful  journey, 
which  must  terminate  in  eternal  life  or  in  eternal  death.  Men, 
blinded  by  the  enemy,  will  keep  fully  occupied  with  everything 
and  anything  but  what  would  conduce  to  the  soul's  salvation. 
Beware  of  Satan's  whiles !  Turn  in  upon  your  own  soul,  and 
ask  yourself,  'Am  I  ready  to  give  in  my  last  account  to  the 
Judge  of  all  the  earth  ?  Can  I  stand  before  His  scrutinizing 
eye  ?  Can  He  look  upoH  me,  and  see  no  spot,  or  wrinkle,  or 
any  such  thing  ?  Can  I  appear  in  perfect  holiness  before  Him 
who  cannot  look  upon  sin  but  with  the  greatest  displeasure  ?' 
Dear  friend  let  me  entreat  you  to  be  honest  with  your  own  soul. 
Eternity,  eternity,  with  all  its  solemn  realities,  is  before  us. 
Flee  at  once  to  Jesus,  the  Saviour  of  poor  sinners,  nor  leave 
Him  until  He  speaks  peace  to  your  soul.  Wrestle  with  Him 
for  this  mighty  blessing  ;  for,  sure  I  am,  if  you  do,  you  will 
get  it.  Give  no  rest  to  your  soul,  until  you  can  say,  'My  soul 
is  saved !  Christ  is  my  surety !  Christ  is  mine,  and  I  am 
Christ's!'  How  busy  is  Satan  Avhen  a  poor  sinner  is  about 
securing  a  glorious  inheritance  !  He  suggests,  '  You  are  saved. 
You  go  to  church ;  you  say  your  prayers ;  you  give  to  the 
poor ;  you  do  no  harm ;  you  have  often  good  thoughts  in  your 
heart.  What  more  can  you  do  ?  Are  you  not  in  your  duty 
when  you  attend  to  your  parliamentary  concerns — the  concerns 
of  the  nation?  Oh,  what  a  wily  foe  is  he!  He  will  try 
every  means  to  keep  a  soul  from  seeking  Jesus  as  a  lost  sinner; 
and  you  will  never  find  Him  until  you  do.  How  would  it 
gladden  my  heart  to  hear  you  say,  '  I  have  found  Him  of  whom 
Moses  and  the  prophets  have  written.'  Leave  Him  not  until 
He  speaks  peace  to  you,  and  sends  you  away  rejoicing  in  Him, 
I  long  to  see  you  going  on  your  way  heavenward,  rejoicing 
in  Christ  Jesus,  and  helping  on  all  who  may  be  halting  or  have 


MAKING   SURE    OF    SALVATION.  291 

got  entangled  in  this  world's  wilderaess.  Take  this  world  in 
its  best  attire,  it  is  but  a  wilderness  of  bitter-sweets.  Dear 
friend,  give  up  your  whole  heart  and  soul  to  Jesus ;  He  will 
accept  you  just  as  you  are.  He  has  said,  ^ I  will  manifest  my- 
self unto  you.''  Go  and  plead  this  promise.  And,  now,  why 
has  Jesus  laid  you  so  near  my  heart  as  to  cause  me  to  write 
this  long  letter?  Because  He  loves  you.  Ever  since  the 
memorable  day  we  met,  your  salvation  has  been  near  my  heart, 
so  that  I  do  know  that  the  Lord  loves  you,  and  that  you  are 
dear  to  Him." 

To  the  Same. — ""Wednesday  morning.  It  is  vain  for  me 
to  promise  to  see  you  in  the  evening.  I  r.m  old  and  feeble, 
and  cannot  do  as  I  could  wish.  I  am  nearing  my  heavenly 
inheritance  ;  and  as  this  poor  body  must  be  laid  by  for  a  while, 
it  also  is  preparing  for  its  quiet  resting-place.  But,  oh,  could 
I  but  tell  you  of  the  blessed  prospect  that  is  before  me,  while 
I  gaze  into  the  better  world,  and  am  sometimes  favoured  with 
glimpses  of  the  glory  that  awaits  me — of  Jesus !  If  you  and 
I  are  ever  saved.  He  bore  all  our  sins  in  that  fearful  moment 
when  He  hung  upon  the  cross.  He  must  have  paid  the  full 
penalty  to  the  uttermost  ere  we  could  get  to  heaven.  Oh, 
think  of  this  ?  And  how  we  ought  to  love  Him  !  "Was  there 
ever  love  like  His  ?  And  was  there  ever  sorrow  like  His  ? 
It  is  this  that  often  breaks  my  heart,  and  melts  it  into  deep, 
deep  contrition  for  sin." 

To  the  Same. — "June  15.  My  Christian  brother,  as  I 
believe  you  really  are  one  of  Christ's  little  flock,  I  wish  to  say 
a  word,  seeing  I  may  not  meet  you  again  in  this  poor,  passing 
world.  It  is  a  poor  world,  could  we  possess  the  whole  of  it, 
with  all  its  hopes  and  glory.  You  mentioned  having  a  better 
record  of  the  Forbes  family  than  mine.  My  son  is  preparing 
a  family  tree,  and  I  should  like  your  record,  if  you  can  spare 
it.  But,  oh,  dear  friend,  how  much  better  for  you  and  me  to 
be  a  living  branch  of  Christ  Jesus,  the  true  Vine  !  According 
to  the  regular  course  of  things,  we  are  hastening  to  the  period 
when  the  summons  must  come  to  each  of  us,  '  Come  up 
hither  !'  Oh,  the  change  from  earth  to  heaven  !  The  thought 
of  seeing  Jesus  face  to  face  !  Think,  the  joy  of  that  moment ! 
And  yet  how  few  I  find  are  living  in  the  full  and  joyful  ex- 
pectation  of   this  coming  event.     And   why  ?    because  they 


292  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOvr. 

have  so  few  transactions  with  Jesus.  '  They  have  so  Httle  to 
say  to  Him,  so  httle  to  do  with  Him.  He  may  be  a  friend  or 
an  enemy,  they  are  not  quite  sure.  They  have  a  sort  of  hope, 
but  it  is  fleeting  and  uncertain.  What  a  poor  hfe  is  this ! 
Dear,  worthy  friend,  I  am  more  and  more  jealous  on  this  sub- 
ject, and  would  urge  upon  all  I  love  not  to  rest  short  of 
knowing  their  reconciliation  to  God  through  Jesus  Christ. 
Aim  to  walk  with  God  even  noiu  !  To  live  upon  Jesus — to 
hold  sweet,  holy  converse  with  Him — to  go  with  an  open 
heart  and  tell  Him  all !  He  will  never  frown  your  soul  away. 
He  will  smile  a  w^elcome,  and  listen  to  all  you  have  to  tell 
Him.  And  when,  conscious  that  we  fall  short  of  what  w^e 
ought  to  be.  He  says.  Only  acknoivledge  thine  iniquity.  Let 
us  set  out  afresh  to  run  the  heavenly  race — warmed  wnth  the 
love  of  Christ  in  our  heart,  anointed  with  the  Holy  Ghost, 
heaven  in  view,  a  crown  of  glory  awaiting  us,  and  Jesus  on 
the  throne  ready  to  bid  us  welcome.  All,  all  is  true.  Heaven 
is  true,  Christ  is  true.  While  everything  around  us  appears 
what  it  is  not,  fixing  our  eyes  on  the  glory  that  awaits  the 
Christian,  we  can  exclaim  to  the  world  lying  in  the  wricked 
one,  Arouse  from  your  slumbers,  and  come  to  Jesus.  He 
stands  ready  to  receive  all  that  come  to  Him,  and  will  in  no- 
wise cast  out.  It  is  worth  ten  thousand  worlds  to  know  Him, 
whom  to  know  is  life  eternal !  All  w^ould  send  love,  but  I 
am  alone  in  my  room,  where  the  Lord  has  often  made  himself 
sweetly,  blessedly  known  to  my  waiting  soul.  It  has  often 
been  a  Bethel  to  me.  There  is  none  on  earth  or  in  heaven 
like  Jesus — the  chiefest  among  ten  thousand,  the  altogether 
lovely.  Oh,  love  Him  !  Give  your  whole,  your  undivided 
heart  to  Him.  If  I  had  a  thousand.  He  should  have  them 
all.     Adieu. 

"  Believe  me,  affectionately,  your  sincere  friend  and  fellow- 
traveller  to  a  better,  brighter  world." 


TO    LADY    L ,   ON    THE    NECESSITY  OF    THE    HOLY    SPIRIT. 

"  My  DEAR  Friend, — 

"How  is  it,  above  everything  else,  with  thy  soul, 
that  better  part,  that  must  live  for  ever  ?  And  yet,  though 
we  know  this,  how  much  more  are  our  thoughts  engaged 
with  this  present  evil  world,  and  our  poor  decaying  bodies, 
than  concerned  to  know  what  awaits  us  in  an  endless  eternity. 


NECESSITY    OF    THE    HOLY    SPIRIT.  293 

Is  not  this  one  of  Satan's  devices?  He  will  endeavour  to 
engage  our  thoughts  with  often  the  veriest  trifles  that  would 
shame  a  child,  in  order  to  hide  from  us  the  eternal  realities  of 
the  glorv  that  awaits  the  believer.  Oh,  let  us  beware  of 
Satan's  devices !  Many  hard  conflicts  have  I  had  with  him 
through  my  long  and  chequered  life  ;  and,  had  I  not  been  up- 
held by  Jesus,  the  sinner's  Friend,  I  should  have  made  ship- 
wreck of  my  faith  long  since.  But  this  dear  Friend  stands 
ready  to  help  you  too.  Recollect,  He  is  a  present  help  in 
every  time  of  need.  You  are  now  in  a  wilderness  ;  but  a 
wealthy  land  lies  before  you.  Make  your  calling  and  election 
sure.  Make  sure  your  acceptance  in  Christ.  Is  there,  or  can 
there  be,  anything  on  earth  of  equal  consequence  to  this  ?  A 
soul  saved,  or  a  soul  lost !  Come,  just  as  you  are,  to  Jesus. 
The  prayer,  'God  be  merciful  to  me  a  sinner,'  springing  from 
a  real  sense  of  our  need,  and  breathed  from  a  heart  feeling  its 
awful  sinfulness,  and  the  utter  impossibility  of  salvation  in  any 
other  way,  will,  in  due  time,  be  responded  to  by  the  Holy 
Spirit.  We  cannot  utter  one  real  prayer  but  b/  the  Holy 
Ghost.  He  it  is  who  shows  us  our  iniquity  and  helplessness, 
teaches  us  how  to  pray,  and  what  to  ask  for,  and  then  responds 
to  our  prayer.  Oh,  dear  friend,  pray  over  your  Bible,  that 
this  same  blessed  Spirit  (the  th^'rd  Person  .^n  the  blessed 
Trinity)  may  unfold  to  your  mind  the  precious  truths  it  con- 
tains. You  do  not  know  how  anxious  I  am  for  your  soul's 
welfare.  I  long  to  see  you  going  on  your  way  rejoicing. 
Never  rest  until  you  can  say,  '  I  have  found  Jesus,  and  my 
soul  is  saved !'  You  can  go  to  Jesus,  the  same  as  did  the  dis- 
ciples when  He  walked  the  streets  of  Jerusalem.  He  is  the 
same  loving,  tender,  condescending  Jesus  that  He  was  then, 
and  will  never  deny  Himself  to  any  who  feel  their  need  of 
Him.  I  am  looking  forward  to  my  great  change.  Absent 
from  the  hody,  present  with  the  Lord.  The  only  thing  worth 
living  for,  is  to  be  prepared  for  the  full  enjoyment  of  the  glory 
that  is  now  prepared  for  all  who  come  to  Jesus.  Come,  just 
as  you  are.  Be  assured  of  this,  if  you  have  one  wish  in  your 
heart  to  love  Jesus,  it  is  because  He  has  first  loved  you  ;  and 
the  Holy  Spirit  is  giving  you  the  desire  to  wish  to  love  Him. 
Excuse  all  blunders.  Make  allowance  for  poor  old  eighty.  I 
am  not  far  from  my  happy  home,  and  it  looks  so  inviting.  Oh, 
the  welcomes !  oh,  the  joy  !  oh,  the  meeting  with  those  that 
have  gone  before !     We  meet  to  part  no  more  for  ever  !" 


294  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY    WIXKLOW. 

TO    MISS    S ,   ON    RUNNING    THE    CHRISTIAN    RACE. 

"My  DEAR  Friend, — 

"  I  have  not  forgotten  my  promise,  to  drop  you  a 
line  of  remembrance.  I  have  often  thought  of  you,  and  my 
hope  abideth  that  you  have  really  and  truly  set  out  on  your 
journey  heavenward.  May  the  Lord  speed  you  on  your 
way.  May  He  keep  you,  moment  by  moment,  looking  unto 
Him  who  is  your  life.  May  you  be  led  to  see  unceasingly 
that  this  world  is  not  worthy  of  one  anxious  thought.  It  is 
all  passing  away,  and  we  shall  soon  stand  before  the  great 
white  throne.  As  you  have  commenced  your  journey,  so  go 
forward.  Do  not  rest  where  you  are.  We  are  on  a  race- 
course. The  point  from  which  we  start  is  conversion ;  the 
goal  to  which  we  run  is  heaven ;  the  prize  for  which  we  con- 
tend is  a  crown  of  glory,  which  the  righteous  Judge  will  give 
us  at  that  great  day.  If,  dear  friend,  you  have  started  in  this 
race,  So  run  that  you  may  obtain.  How  few  lay  these  great 
things  to  heart!  The  world  and  its  trifles  so  engross  the 
thoughts,  that  God  and  Christ,  and  eternity,  with  our  vast 
responsibility,  are  shut  out  of  sight ;  and  Satan,  the  great  foe 
of  mankind,  gains  his  point,  unless  Sovereign  grace  interferes, 
and  opens  the  bhnd  eye  to  see  the  danger,  and  Jesus  the 
Refuge.  Oh,  what  a  mercy  of  mercies  to  know  all  this,  and 
to  act  upon  it !  Yet  how  many  are  satisfied  with  the  form  of 
godliness,  while  they  know  nothing  of  its  power.  They  go  to 
church,  repeat  many  prayers,  yet  never  feel  sin  a  weight,  a 
grievous  burden,  nor  shed  one  tear  before  God  for  having 
sinned  against  Him.  Oh,  it  is  with  a  holy,  heart-searching 
God  that  we  have  to  do.  And  the  soul  is  of  more  value  than 
ten  million  worlds.  What  shall  it  profit  a  man  if  he  gain  the 
ivhole  world  and  lose  his  oicn  soid?  These  are  solemn,  awful 
truths ;  but  only  by  a  few  are  they  laid  to  heart.  May  the 
Lord  enable  you  to  bring  your  heart  to  Him,  who  alone  can 
heal  it  thoroughly ;  and  may  he  lead  you  in  the  right  way.  I 
believe  that  none  will  ever  come  to  Jesus  until  they  feel  that 
they  are  lost  and  undone  in  themselves.  He  came  not  to  call 
the  righteous,  but  sinners  to  repentance.  Oh,  come  as  you 
are — bhnd,  wretched,  helpless,  and  in  that  state  cast  your- 
selves at  the  feet  of  Jesus,  and  He  will  not  spurn  you  from 
His  presence.  Read  the  third  chapter  of  Jolm's  gospel  to  all 
whom  you  may  find  anxious  about  eternal  realities.     May  you 


WAITING    UPON    GOD.  295 

be  made  a  blessing  to  many.  A  great  work  has  been  done  in 
you,  and  a  great  work  is  to  be  done  by  you.  All  who  know 
the  Lord  should  let  their  light  shine  before  men,  that  others 
might  be  led  to  the  true  light.  Oh,  the  mercy  of  being  in  the 
right  road — the  narrow  road,  that  leads  to  life  eternal.  Dear 
friend,  study  your  Bible  with  prayer  for  the  teaching  of  the 
Holy  Spirit.  Read  the  first  and  second  chapters  of  Ephesians, 
and  pray  over  these  precious  portions  of  God's  Avord,  that  the 
Spirit  may  lead  you  into  all  the  riclmess,  fulness,  and  sweet- 
ness therein ;  that  with  an  assured  hope  you  might  not  only 
go  on  your  way  rejoicing,  but  may  also  be  instrumental  in 
leading  others  to  examine  for  themselves.  Oh,  what  is  all  the 
grandeur,  wealth,  and  honour  of  this  fleeting  world,  compared 
with  the  glory  that  awaits  the  believer  in  Jesus  ?  Kings  and 
queens  pass  away,  and  leave  their  crowns  ;  but  the  Christian 
goes  to  his,  and  wears  it  through  eternity — ever  bright,  ever 
pure." 

To  an  aged  Christian,  whose  trembling  faith  her  letters  had 
often  nourished,  and  who,  since  her  own  departure,  has  gone 
to  unite  with  her  in  the  song  of  the  Lamb,  she  thus  encourag- 
ingly writes : — 

TO    LADY    MARY    F — ,   ON    WAITING    UPON    GOD. 

"  Dear  Sister  in  the  Lord, —  London,  May  25,  1848. 

"  For  as  such  I  hail  you.  We  are  travelling  fast,  and 
are  nearing  at  every  step  our  heavenly  home.  We  shall  both 
see  Jesus  soon — oh,  how  soon ! — and  know  even  as  we  are 
known.  All  that  he  has  spoken  is  confirmed  truth.  Then,  let 
us  take  Him  at  His  word,  believe  it,  and  go  on  rejoicing  in 
Christ  Jesus.  What  a  mercy  of  mercies  that  He  has  conde- 
scrmded  to  call  us  out  of  darkness  into  His  marvellous  light, 
and  to  translate  us  into  the  kingdom  of  His  dear  Son  !  What 
do  we  not  owe  Him  for  this  rich  display  of  sovereign  mercy  ? 
I  often  have  to  exclaim.  Lord,  why  me?  such  a  poor  sinner 
as  I  am  to  be  brought  nigh  unto  God — adopted  into  His  fam- 
ily— made  an  heir  of  God,  and  a  joint-heir  with  Christ  Jesus  ? 
Such  are  we  in  Him.  Let  us  hold  fast  our  oneness  with 
Christ,  then  we  shall  be  better  enabled  to  walk  with  God. 
We  are  journeying  to  the  inheritance  which  the  Lord  our  God 
has  given  to  us,  through  a  world  crowded  with  temptations  on 
either  side,  which  would  divert  us  from  the  way,  if  it  were 
possible.     Our  %vorst  foe.  the  body  of  sin  and  death,  we  bear 


296  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

about  with  us.  But  our  Jesus  is  for  us,  and  withal  we  can 
sav,  More  are  they  icho  art  fur  lis,  than  they  ivho  are  against  us. 
God  the  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Ghost,  are  on  our  side,  and 
these  are  Almighty .  Dear  friend,  seeing  these  things  are  so, 
what  manner  of  persons  ought  we  to  be,  in  all  manner  of  holy 
conversation  and  godliness !  God  be  praised  on  your  behalf, 
that  He  has  brought  you  so  for.  T\'e  may  not  meet  in  this 
vale  uf  tear.-,  but  I  shall  meet  you  above,  and  shall  know  you 
amongst  the  goodly  company  that  are  around  the  throne  upon 
which  Jesus  sits,  in  all  the  majesty  of  heaven,  waiting  to  wel- 
come his  pilgrims  home.  Let  us  endeavour  to  allure  all  we 
love  to  join  us  on  the  way.  I  have  just  been  bringing  all 
mine,  one  by  one,  to  Him  who  is  able  to  save  to  the  uttermost. 
I  know  something  of  His  power  and  unparalleled  love  towards 
poor  sinners.  Let  us  pray  on  for  those  who  are  dear  to  us. 
Our  God  hears  and  answers  prayer.  On  him  let  us  wait,  and 
wait  unweariedly  until  He  answers.  In  waiting  on  Him  for 
those  dear  to  us,  we  shall  receive  a  blessing  for  our  own  soul. 
We  cannot  approach  Infinite  Goodness  without  getting  good. 
And  oh,  how  blessedly  refreshing  and  in\'igorating  is  the  lifting 
up  of  the  light  of  His  countenance  upon  our  wearv  and  tried 
souls !  It  is  a  wonder  that  we  are  not  oftener  at  His  gracious 
footstool.  What  could  we  do  in  this  poor  dving  world  with- 
out a  throne  of  grace,  and  a  Gt^d  of  grace  upon  the  throne,  in 
our  every  time  of  need  ?  Oh,  let  us  keep  close  to  Him  who 
loved  us  with  an  everlasting  love,  and  with  loving-kindness 
has  drawn  us  to  Himself.  In  waiting  upon  Him,  let  us  not 
be  satisfied  without  the  feeling  that  His  ear  is  hearkening  to 
us.  This  is  very  important — I  must  feel  that  he  hears  me,  the 
blessed  Spirit  bearing  witness  with  my  spirit  that  God,  even 
my  God  and  Father,  hears  his  poor  child's  pleadings.  This  is 
the  pri^-ilege  of  all  the  dear  family  of  God.  To  each  one  He 
says,  Ask%  that  your  joy  may  he  full.  He  upbraids  His  disci- 
ples for  asking  so  little ;  AsJc  what  you  icill  in  my  name,  and 
it  shall  be  done  unto  you.  There  He  sits  at  the  right  hand  of 
God,  to  make  intercession  for  us.  He  is  waiting  to  be  gra- 
cious. Let  us,  then,  trim  our  lamps,  that  at  His  coming  we 
may  be  found  quite  ready.  The  Lord  bless  you  with  much  of 
His  sensible  presence,  is  my  prayer." 


EXCOURAnEMEXTS    TO    PRAYEE.  297 


TO  MRS.  W .       ENCOURAGEMENTS  TO  PRAYER. 

"  My  Dear  Christian  Friend. —  Nov.  24. 

'*  .  .  .1  trust  the  Lord  will  in  due  time  answer 
Tour  prayers,  as  it  respects  your  dear  children.  All  power  is 
mine,  says  Christ,  in  heaven  and  on  earth.  Oh,  the  mighty 
power  of  prayer  with  God  our  Father,  in  the  name  of  His 
beloved  Son !  We  must  get  to  heaven  before  we  know  what 
that  power  has  been  in  its  fullest  sense.  Command  ye  vie. 
Oh,  the  luxury  of  prayer !  "We  have  intercourse  truly,  famil- 
iar intercourse  with  God.  To  talk  with  God.  To  go  and  shut 
the  door,  and  tell  God  all,  all  that  is  in  our  heart.  To  feel 
that  He  is  listening  to  hear  what  we  have  to  say  to  Him ;  and 
then  to  wait  and  see  what  He  will  say  to  us.  Dear  friend, 
such,  as  you  know,  is  the  privilege  of  all  the  saints.  It  may 
be  long  ere  you  see  your  prayers  answered ;  for  faith  must  be 
brought  into  exercise ;  and  often,  when  we  are  ready  to  give 
all  up,  then  the  Lord  comes,  and,  although  in  a  very  different 
manner  to  what  we  expected.  He  answers  our  prayers,  and 
puts  our  unbelief  to  the  blush.  Oh,  to  have  such  a  God  to 
deal  with,  and  to  know  that  He  is  always  deahng  with  us  in 
His  providence  and  by  His  Spirit !  Glorious  is  our  high  call- 
ing in  Christ  Jesus.  It  is  He  who  says,  ^Ask  anything  in  my 
name,  and  I  will  do  if.'  Is  anything  too  hard  for  mef  saith 
the  Lord.  What  could  I  do  with  such  a  heavy  charge  laid 
upon  my  heart,  if  I  had  not  such  a  God  to  deal  with  ?  Fifty- 
seven  immortals,  bearing  my  name,  do  I  think  of,  and  pray 
for.  Some  are  converted,  others  still  in  nature's  darkness.  Is 
there  not  work  enough  here  for  one  poor  pilgrim  ?  But  such 
is  the  power  of  the  Most  High,  and  such  the  fulness  of  Christ, 
and  such  the  boundless  love  of  God  in  Jesus,  that  I  am  greatly 
encouraged  to  make  large  demands  upon  Him  in  the  dear  and 
all-prevailing  name  of  His  own  Son  and  of  my  own  Saviour. 
So  you  see  I  would  try  to  encourage  you,  too,  to  pray  on,  and 

to  expect  an  answer  when  your  faith  is  fully  tried 

I  have  been  greatly  exercised  as  to  the  path  of  duty  for . 

But  I  gave  myself  to  prayer,  which,  in  all  circumstances,  ad- 
verse or  otherwise,  is  my  stronghold.  I  can  find  my  way  to 
the  heart  of  God,  when  I  cannot  elsewhere  do  good,  or  shape 
things  as  I  would  Avish.  He  is,  and  ever  has  been,  a  present 
help  to  me  in  all  my  troubles,  trials,  and  adversities.  I  would 
not  now  have  been  without  them  all.     It  was  in  love  He  dealt 


298  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

with  me.  .  .  .  This  is  the  God  I  have  now  to  do  with, 
day  by  day,  moment  by  moment.  I  rest  on  His  loving,  Fa- 
therly care ;  and  no  tongue  can  tell  the  rich  enjoyment  of  sit- 
ting in  all  tlie  helplessness  of  infancy  at  His  feet,  and  know 
that  He  is  listening  to  all  I  would  say  to  Him,  and  all  that  I 
would  need  to  say,  though  unexpressed.  Oh,  how  few  really 
know  God  !  I  meet  with  many  hearsay  Christians,  who  have 
heard  of  Jesus,  as  Job  did,  with  the  hearing  of  the  ear,  but 
who  have  no  personal  acquaintance  with  Him.  They  have 
never  come  to  Christ  as  poor,  wretched,  blind  and  naked ;  and 
therefore  they  know  nothing  of  that  peace  which  the  applica- 
tion of  the  atoning  blood  alone  can  impart.  They  have  never 
come  in  contact  with  Christ.  They  only  believe  what  others 
say  of  Him,  and  know  nothing  of  a  blessed  recognition,  a 
oneness,  and  a  holy  intercourse  between  Jesus  and  the  poor 
sinner,  saved  by  sovereign  grace,  and  eternal,  everlasting  love. 
Pray  on ;  wrestle  with  Christ." 

TO  THE  SAME, ON  THE  OXFORD  TRACTS. 

"The  Lord,  I  believe,  is  answering  prayer  by  all  these 
things  that  at  present  alarm  us.  I  have  long  regarded  the 
church,  the  one  church,  composed  of  all  the  chosen  of  God,  as 
comparable  to  a  house  out  of  order,  with  nothing  in  its  right 
place  ;  so  that  it  has  been  my  constant  prayer,  '  Lord,  when 
wilt  Thou  come  and  set  Thine  own  hand  to  the  work,  putting 
down  the  work  of  men,  and  causing  Thine  own  ordinances  to 
be  duly  honoured  ?'  When  the  '  Oxford  Tracts'  first  made 
their  appearance,  I  remarked  that  the  Lord  was  about  to  com- 
mence His  own  work,  in  His  own  way.  That  Baptismal  Re- 
generation would  do  it.  From  that  moment  I  have  been 
watching  events :  and  when  the  Papal  Aggression  came,  it 
gave  me  no  alarm.  Jesus  reigns.  Oh,  that  He  would  appear 
in  this  awful  state  of  confusion,  and  cause  His  own  people  to 
come  out  of  Babylon,  shake  off  the  dust  from  their  feet,  and 
separate  themselves  from  the  ungodly.  The  Lord  is  about  to 
do  a  great  work,  and  what  we  have  to  do  is  to  humble  our- 
selves before  Him  on  account  of  the  abominations  of  the  land. 
I  believe  that  His  hand  is  in  this  ^Aggression,' — in  the  con- 
fusion that  confounds  our  senators,  and  in  all  that  is  now  going 
forward  ;  and  if  we  watch  and  pray,  we  shall  see  it  plainer 
and  plainer.  My  soul  rejoices  in  God  my  Saviour,  and  I  have 
no  fears  nor  misgivings.   My  prayers  are  about  to  be  answered, 


HEAVEN,  AX    INCENTIVE   TO    PERSEVERANCE.        299 

and  the  one  elect  church  will  be  purified  from  all  the  dross, 
and  will  stand  forth  fair  as  the  moon,  clear  as  the  sun,  and  ter- 
rible as  an  army  icith  lanners.  I  have  had  a  blessed  praying 
time  this  morning,  and  could  open  my  mouth  wide,  and  ask 
great  things  concerning  His  one  church.  Thirteen  ladies  have 
engaged  to  meet  every  morning,  at  eight  o'clock,  in  united 
prayer  for  the  Queen.  Oh,  I  do  know  something  of  the  mighty 
power  of  prayer,  particularly  united  prayer.  In  the  midst  of 
all  the  public  excitement,  my  little  bark  is  riding  serenely 
through  the  storm,  and  soon  I  shall  drop  my  anchor  in  the  still 
waters  of  eternal  rest  and  glory." 

"...  I  feel  that  one  reason  why  many  real  Christians  do 
not  go  on  their  way  rejoicing,  is,  that  they  deify  the  humanity 
of  Christ.  They  feel  they  are  coming  to  a  holy  God,  who 
cannot  look  at  sin  without  infinite  displeasure ;  and  this  view 
of  Jesus  repels  and  throws  them  back.  Whereas  Jesus  is  the 
very  same  Jesus  now  that  He  was  when  He  walked  the  streets 
of  Jerusalem.  Though  His  body  is  glorified,  He  is  not  altered. 
His  heart  is  still  the  same,  full  of  sympathy  and  love,  ready  to 
listen  to  all  we  have  to  say  to  Him,  and  to  do  all  w^e  ask  Him 
to  do,  and  in  the  best  possible  w^ay.  Precious  Jesus !  is  He 
not  altogether  lovely  ?  He  is  everything  to  my  soul.  Life 
were  an  aching  void  without  Him.  Now  and  then  He  lifts 
the  veil,  and  gives  me  a  blessed  glimpse  of  the  glory  that 
awaits  me  and  all  who  love  His  appearing." 

TO    MRS.    C ,    ON    HEAVEN,    AN    INCENTIVE    TO 

PERSEVERANCE. 

"  Dear  Friend London,  Feb.  10th,  1840. 

"  How  is  it  with  the  poor  body,  and  how  is  it  with 
your  precious  soul  ?  Looking  forward,  I  trust,  to  your  blessed 
meeting  with  Him,  who  so  loved  you  as  to  die  that  you  might 
live  with  Him  in  that  place  He  has  gone  to  prepare  for  you. 
Only  think  of  this  !  Jesus  is  above,  and  is  ready  to  welcome 
you  home.  Let  us  hourly  realize  this, — realize  heaven,  with  all 
its  glories.  Your  dear  sister  stands  ready,  amongst  many 
more,  to  welcome  you  there.  And  more  than  all,  and  above 
all,  is  Jesus,  wath  a  countenance  radiant  with  love,  prepared 
to  rejoice  over  every  emancipated  soul  that  leaves  this  world 
of  sin  and  sorrow,  to  enter  into  the  enjoyment  of  w^hat  He  has 
prepared  for  it.  And  behold  the  goodly  company  around  the 
throne  ;  and  believe,  that  if  there  is  joy  in  heaven  among  the 


300  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

angels  of  Grod  over  a  sinner  that  repenteth,  there  is  also  a  joy 
among  saints  and  angels  over  every  released  saint  that  reaches 
heaven  at  last.  Glory  to  Him  who  hath  done  such  great 
things  for  us !  "When  Lazarus  departed,  angels  attended  him, 
nor  left  him  until  they  bore  him  to  Abraham's  bosom.  I  be- 
lieve this  is  the  case  with  all  who  love  the  Saviour.  They  are 
absent  from  the  body,  and  that  same  moment  they  are  present 
with  the  Lord.  What  rapture  to  fall  at  His  feet,  and  to  hear 
Him  say,  Come^  ye  blessed  of  my  Father  I  Oh,  that  the  saints 
of  God  would  live  more  in  the  anticipation  of  the  glory  that 
awaits  them !  There  is  much  of  heaven  to  be  enjoyed  even 
on  earth.  Let  us  live,  too,  more  in  holy  familiarity  with 
Jesus.  Nothing  is  too  much  beneath  His  notice.  As  dear 
old  Mr.  John  Newton  says,  'If  the  buzzing  of  a  fly  is  an  an- 
noyance to  us,  it  is  our  privilege  to  carry  it  to  Jesus.' 

"  The  question  again  recurs,  how  is  it  with  your  soul?  Are 
your  prospects  growing  brighter  and  brighter  as  you  travel  on  ? 
Do  you  find  Jesus  nearer  and  more  precious  day  by  day  ? 
"What  progress  have  you  and  I  made  ?  We  have  had  our 
conflicts,  our  wanderings  and  backslidings  many ;  but  still  on- 
Avards  we  must  go.  There  is  no  standstill  in  this  journey.  We 
know  less  or  more  of  Christ  than  we  did  a  year  ago.  Tell 
me  when  you  saw  Him  last,  and  how  you  feel  in  the  prospect 
of  soon  being  with  the  beloved  One  for  ever  and  ever.  I  am 
not  happy  here  without  Him,  and  should  be  miserable  indeed, 
were  I  not  quite  sure  of  seeing  and  dwelling  with  Him  in  glory. 
Jesus  is  all  in  all  to  my  soul,  and  life  would  be  wearisome  in- 
deed were  it  not  so.  He  makes  up  the  sum  of  my  happiness 
here,  and  will  be  my  joy,  my  life,  and  my  glory  hereafter. 
Dear  friend,  let  us  speed  more  our  journey,  nor  loiter  in  the 
way.  I  must  conclude.  The  Lord  is  prospering  His  work 
amongst  us." 

TO    MISS    C ,   ON    THE    INTERCESSION    OF    CHRIST. 

"  I  am  sitting  in  my  quiet  room,  beloved  friend,  where  I 
have  been  blessing  and  praising  God  for  His  ten  thousand, 
thousand  mercies,  in  giving  me  such  an  all-sufficient  Saviour 
and  precious  Intercessor  as  His  beloved  Son.  Having  taken 
a  body  like  our  own,  though  free  from  all  taint  of  sin.  He  is 
both  able  and  willing  to  make  intercession  for  us  with  a  holy, 
holy  Lord  God,  wlio  cannot  but  behold  sin  with  infinite  dis- 
pleasure.    What  a  mercy  for  such   as  we  are,  who  feel  tlie 


THE   GOODNESS   OF   GOD.  301 

taint  of  sin  in  all  we  do  and  saj,  to  be  enabled  to  present  all 
our  petitions  in  the  dear  name  of  God's  Son,  with  whom  the 
Father  is  ever  well  pleased !  Such  an  intercessor  was  need- 
ful. God  has  said  to  Jesus,  '  If  thy  children  backslide^  I  luill 
chasten  them  with  the  rod ;  nevertheless  my  loving -kindness  will 
I  not  utterly  take  from  them,  nor  suffer  my  faithfulness  to  failj 
We  often  sin,  and  deserve  a  Father's  rod  ;  but  Jesus,  at  the 
right  hand,  prays,  ^Father,  forgive  them!  Such  is  Jesus  tc 
us,  making  intercession  moment  by  moment,  and  presenting 
all  our  petitions  in  His  own  blessed  name.  Is  not  this  most 
blessed  ?  Does  it  not  give  us  an  inexpressibly  endearing  view 
of  Jesus,  our  elder  Brother,  our  Brother  born  for  adversity? 

And  now  I  am  going  to  tell  you  good  news.     Dear  W is 

converted.  He  has  found  Jesus  precious  to  his  soul. 
It  is  a  mercy  to  see  any  asking  their  way  to  Zion,  with  theii 
faces  thitherward.  I  believe  that  God  is  about  to  work  like 
Himself;  and  to  overturn,  overturn,  and  overturn,  to  accom 
plish  His  own  blessed  will.  Let  us,  who  are  of  the  day,  watch 
and  pray.  Who  would  not  live  for  eternity  ?  Is  it  not  strange 
that  we  can  for  one  moment  lose  sight  of  heaven,  and  the  in- 
creasing glory,  as  long  as  the  existence  of  God  Himself,  and 
grovel  in  the  dust  to  gather  pebbles,  for  the  pleasure  of  throw- 
ing them  afterwards  away  ?  Man  walks  in  a  vain  show,  and, 
blindfolded,  goes  down  to  the  grave  unsaved  !  Join  me  in 
praising  God  for  His  great  and  distinguishing  mercy  to  us,  in 
opening  our  eyes,  and  leading  us  to  His  beloved  Son,  that  we 
might  be  saved  with  a  sure  and  everlasting  salvation.  Let  us 
keep  close  to  Jesus,  and  pray  for  each  other.  I  thank  you 
again  for  the  nice  help  to  my  blind  eyes.  The  spectacles  are 
always  at  my  side." 

TO    THE    SAME. 

"  I  have  written  to  you  of  the  Lord's  goodness  to  us  in  the 

conversion  of  W .     The  Lord  is  good  indeed.     My  soul 

rejoices  in  God  my  Saviour.  Let  us  ever  trust  Him  for  His 
unchanging  and  unchangeable  love.  From  everlasting  to 
everlasting  He  has  loved  us ;  and  all  the  varying  dispensations 
of  His  loving  providence  are  only  to  prepare  us  more  completely 
f  jr  the  place  He  is  now  preparing  for  us.  Let  us  aim  to  see 
Him  in  all  things,  and  to  have  Him  ever  present  with  us. 
How  sweet  to  walk  through  the  wilderness  v.-ith  our  hand  in 
His   hand,    feeling   that    He    is   leading   us   safely  along   tl^e 


302  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.   MARY    WIXSLOW. 

narrow  road  that  leads  to  everlasting  life!  Dear  friend,  may- 
Jesus  be  more  and  more  precious  to  you  and  me.  Cannot  jou 
repeat  from  your  heart  these  lines  with  me  ? 

Is  there  a  thing  beneath  the  sun 
That  strives  with  thee  my  heart  to  share  ? 

Ah  !   take  it  thence,  and  reign  alone, 
The  Lord  of  every  motion  tliere. 

Then  shaU  my  heart  fi-om  earth  be  free, 

When  it  hath  found  repose  in  thee." 

"  None  but  Jesus  can  make  us  happy  here  and  hereafter. 
Only^  believe,  and  wait  the  time  when  we  shall  more  fully 
understand  this  great  mystery  of  godliness.  Oh,  the  glorious 
prospect  that  is  before  the  feeblest  child  of  God  !  Look  often 
at  your  inheritance.  Take  your  walks  in  the  garden  of  love 
above.  See  Jesus  there,  no  longer  wearing  a  crown  of  thorns, 
but  a  diadem  of  glory,  in  the  very  same  body  He  carried  up 
with  liim.  There  is  your  dear  sister  among  the  number,  and 
oh,  how  many  that  I  love  who  are  waiting  to  welcome  me 
home  !  Dear  friend,  realize  it.  It  will  tend  to  strengthen  your 
faith,  and  brighten  your  hope.     My  loving  love  to  your  cousin.'* 

TO  HER  SON  O ,   A  MOTHER's  PRAYERS. 

" I  have  just  had  an  interview  with  the  Lord  our 

God,  and  a  blessed  one  it  has  been  to  my  soul.  And  do  you 
think  I  forgot  you  all  ?  Oh,  that  the  Lord  might  be  to  you 
what  He  was  to  the  family  at  Bethany — the  Martha,  and  the 
Mary,  and  the  Lazarus,  whom  He  loved  !  I  have  been  asking 
great  things  for  you  all;  for,  while  He  held  out  the  sceptre, 
my  heart  was  full,  and  my  mouth  opened  wide  to  ask  much 
for  you  all,  and  all  whom  God  has  given  me.  Oh,  what  a 
mighty  privilege  is  the  believer's — to  have  holy^  intercourse 
with,  and  blessed  access  to,  the  God  of  heaven !  May  we 
never  lose  sight  of  it,  but  ask  much,  and  expect  what  w-e  ask 
for.  God  is  leading  us  in  a  right  way  to  the  New  Jerusalem 
above ;  and  all  we  have  to  do  is,  to  keep  a  steady  eye  upon 
Him ;  for,  be  assured,  He  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  us. 
All  is  true,  as  God  is  true.  Keep  your  eye  intently  upon  Him. 
Take  no  step  without  Him.  Beware  of  forming  plans  in  your 
owm  mind,  and  then  coming  to  ask  counsel  of  God.  Never 
let  us  forget  that  God  has  to  do  with  us  every  moment  of  our 
existence,  and  we  ought  to  liave  to  do  with  Him.  We  are 
not  to  he  like  the  world  around  us,  but  to  walk  humbly  and 


CHRISTIAN    UNION.  303 

closely  with  God.  Blessed  be  His  name,  he  gives  me  at  times 
such  blessed  access  to  Him,  that  I  can  testify  it  is  real,  it  is 
true.  Mj  soul  seems  swallowed  up  in  God.  I  feel  heaven  so 
near,  that  I  am  almost  in  the  actual  presence.  Yes,  Jesus  is 
above.  Our  own  Joseph  lives,  and  for  you  and  for  me  He 
has  said  it,  and  I  believe  it.  Oh,  I  do  think  He  will  give  us  a 
revivah  He  will  do  again  what  he  has  once  done.  What 
blessed  nearness  to  Himself  He  gave  me  one  morning  when  I 
descended  from  my  room,  and  said  '  Look  out  for  the  Lord,  for 
He  is  near  you  !  '  Oh,  may  He  appear  once  again  for  us,  and 
revive  His  work  in  all  our  souls,  and  in  His  churches!  How- 
do  I  long  to  see  it !  To-day  He  has  given  me  fresh  testimony 
of  his  unchanging  love,  and  that  He  is  near  to  us,  oh,  how 
near  !  May  he  suffer  no  root  of  bitterness  to  spring  up  among 
us,  and  the  Spirit  be  grieved,  and  the  work  be  hindered.  God 
be  gracious  to  us,  and  come  and  bless  us  !  We  cannot  do 
without  Him,  for  He  is  our  joy,  our  hfe,  our  all.  Without 
Him,  the  world,  and  all  it  calls  good,  is  a  wretched  wilderness  ; 
with  Him,  a  wilderness  can  be  a  paradise  to  our  souls,  and  a 
little  heaven  below." 

TO  THE  SAME ON  CHRISTIAN  UNION. 

"  Wednesday  Evening. 
"  You  are  just  now  preaching,  and  I  have  been  praying  for 
you  again  and  again.  I  am  alone  in  the  drawing-room.  I 
was  just  thinking,  after  reading  about  the  Evangelical  Alli- 
ance, could  you  not  write  a  work  on  the  Unity  of  the  Church, 
grounding  your  subject  on  the  passage,  Love  ye  one  another,  as 
I  have  loved  you  ?  Love  to  the  brethren  springs  from  the  love 
of  God  in  the  renewed  soul.  This  love  surpassing  all  creature 
love,  and  enkindled  by  the  indwelling  of  the  Holy  Ghost, 
must  necessarily  unite  the  one  family  of  God.  If  the  Holy 
Spirit  dwells  in  me,  when  communicating  with  another,  who 
also  is  a  temple  of  the  Holy  Ghost,  the  Spirit  within  me  will 
surely  acknowledge  His  own  image  in  the  other,  and  love  will 
necessarily  flow  out  towards  the  individual.  Therefore  the  apostle 
says.  We  knoiv  that  we  have  passed  from  death  unto  life,  hecause 
we  love  the  brethren.  If  the  Lord  lay  this  subject  with  power 
on  your  mind,  and  open  it  to  you,  so  that  you  can  write  upon 
it,  it  may  be  a  great  blessing  to  the  church  of  God.  The  love 
of  Christ  to  His  saints  is  to  be  the  measure  of  their  love  to 
one  another." 


304  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 


TO    MRS.    H ,    ON    THE    INFINITE    LOVE    OF    CHRIST. 

"Dear  Friend, —  January  17. 

"  I  must  not  forget  to  wish  you  a  '  happy  new  year,'  in 
the  best  sense  of  the  word.  Oh,  that  in  this  new  year,  you 
and  I  might  grow  in  grace  and  in  the  knowledge  of  Jesus 
Christ  more  rapidly  than  we  have  hitherto  done  !  Thus  we 
shall  grow  in  meetness  for  our  heavenly  inheritance.  Christ 
has  gone  to  take  possession  of  heaven  in  our  behalf.  He 
would  not  delegate  this  to  the  highest  angel  in  glory.  He 
knew  that  He  was  the  fittest  One  to  do  this.  It  was  love, 
infinite  love,  that  brought  Him  down  to  earth.  It  was  infinite 
love  that  led  Him  to  pass  through  the  tremendous  conflict, 
when  He  grappled  with  death,  hell,  and  the  grave.  It  was 
infinite  love  that  sustained  Him  in  it,  and  that  brought  Him 
out  of  it  a  royal  Conqueror.  It  was  infinite  love  that  bore 
Him  back  to  heaven,  where  he  is  now,  and  where  we  shall  be 
also.  Oh,  for  this  hope,  this  good  hope,  through  grace,  let  our 
hearts  abound  with  holy  love  towards  Him. 

"And  now,  what  have  we  to  do  here,  but  to  glorify  Him 
who  has  done  such  great  things  for  us !  The  influenza  has 
been  raging,  and  many,  strong  and  healthy,  have  been  sum- 
moned into  eternity What  a  stormy  life  is  this ! 

Gale  after  gale,  all  to  show  us  that  this  is  not  our  rest,  but  that 
a  better  awaits  us,  even  a  heavenly.  Who  would  live  away? 
Who  would  desire  to  dwell  on  these  lower  grounds,  where 
sickness  and  sorrow,  the  sad  consequences  of  sin,  follow  in  our 
wake  ?  In  heaven,  our  happy  home,  we  shall  enjoy  perfect 
holiness  and  perfect  happiness.  Oh,  that  you  and  I  might  live 
for  that,  towards  which  time  is  so  rapidly  hurrying  us !  Dear 
friend,  keep  close  to  Jesus  and  a  throne  of  grace.  If  you  feel 
your  heart  cold,  go  at  once,  and  He  will  warm  it.  If  you  feel 
it  hard  and  impenitent,  go,  and  He  will  soften  and  awaken  it 
to  sweet  contrition.  Go,  under  all  circumstances  and  with  all 
frames.  All  your  difficulties,  however  small  or  however  great, 
you  have  a  right  to  bring  to  Jesus,  casting  all  your  care  upon 
Iliin^  for  He  careth  for  you.  Dear  friend,  Jesus  wants  you  and 
me  to  live  more  upon  Him,  like  little  helpless  children.  I 
hardly  know  how  to  dismiss  this  darling  theme,  so  full  of  con- 
solation is  it.  May  the  Lord  bless  and  keep  you  very  near 
Himself" 


DEATH  OF  A  CHILD.  305 

TO  MRS.  C.  G ,  ON  THE  DEATH  OF  A  CHILD. 

"  My  dear  Friend, —  Sept.  9,  18.30. 

"  I  was  not  aware,  until  I  called  to  inquire  after  you 
this  (v.-ning,  that  the  Lord  had  taken  your  little  one.  My 
heart  tenderly  sympathizes  with  you;  for  I  know,  by  sad  ex- 
perience, what  the  feelings  of  a  bereaved  mother  are.  May 
the  Lord  be  gracious  to  you,  and  whisper  sweetly  to  your 
heart,  'All  is  well!'  He  has  mercifully  housed  your  sweet 
flower,  and  when  you  get  above  you  will  find  him  there, 
blooming  in  eternal  youth.  We  know  not  when  our  little 
ones  are  so  early  removed,  from  Avhat  evil  a  gracious  God  has 
taken  them.  He  sees  the  end  from  the  beginning  ;  we  cannot 
discern  a  single  step.  How  much  better,  then,  to  leave  all  in 
His  dear  hands,  who  loves  them  better  than  we  can,  and  be- 
cause He  loves  them,  takes  them  home.  All  His  dispensations 
are  designed  to  draw  us  closer  to  Himself,  and  He  would  re- 
move every  object  that  comes  between  Him  and  us.  Your 
faith,  as  well  as  mine,  has  been  sharply  tried  ;  but  Jesus  is 
watching  us  both,  and  not  one  trial  too  much  shall  we  have. 
His  loving  eye  is  upon  you ;  let  yours  be  up  to  Him.  Call 
upon  me  in  the  day  of  trouble,  and  I  loill  deliver  thee,  and  thou 
sJialt  glorify  me,  is  a  promise  which  has  been  worth  untold  gold 
to  me.  I  never  knew  it  to  fail.  If  He  did  not  remove  the 
trouble  in  my  way,  He  did  so  in  a  far  better  way.  I  have 
felt  for  you,  and  have  brought  your  case  before  the  Lord. 
May  he  sanctify  abundantly  the  discipline  of  the  covenant. 
Whom  he  loves  He  chastens.  Let  us  make  sure  work  for 
eternity.  There  are  some  who  take  these  things  for  granted. 
Now  in  a  matter  of  such  tremendous  importance,  God  is 
too  good  to  leave  us  to  an  uncertainty.  There  is  such  a  thing 
as  knoiuing  that  our  sins  are  forgiven,  and  having  the  witness 
of  the  Spirit  with  ours  that  this  is  the  case.  Look  not  so  much 
within  for  evidences,  as  to  Christ,  who  has  done  the  great,  the 
mighty  work  for  us  who  believe  with  all  our  heart  unto  salva- 
tion.    The  Lord  bless  you." 

TO  MISS  B ,   ON  THE  SOLEMNITY  OF  DEATH. 

*'  My  dear  Friend, —  Feb.  17.  1851. 

"  .  .  .1  cannot  but  feel  that  it  is  a  solemn  thing 
to  hear  that  one  is  so  soon  to  enter  the  eternal  world  before 
me,  so  much  younger  than  myself.     And  vet  this  awaits  us 


306  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

all ;  and  blessed  is  the  thought,  that  if  we  are  really  what  we 
profess  to  be,  we  may  rejoice  when  tli£  summons  comes  to 
bring  us  home  to  God.  In  a  little  while,  and  we  shall  meet 
to  go  no  more  out  for  ever.  Should  not  this  make  us  to  rejoice 
in  the  prospect  before  us,  and  cause  us  to  trim  our  lamps  afresh, 
and  be  quite  ready  when  the  message  comes  ?  It  is  a  solenm 
thing  to  die ;  and  yet  how  few  are  thoroughly  prepared  for  it ! 
May  we  be  found  in  readiness  ;  this  only  can  be  as  we  are 
living  and  walking  with  the  Lord.  Death,  to  the  believer,  is 
but  passing  out  of  a  world  of  sorrow  and  sin,  and  entering 
upon  a  world  of  indescribable  glory.  If  we  lived  more  in  an- 
ticipation of  the  happiness  that  awaits  us,  earth  would  have 
less  hold  on  our  heart's  best  affections.     Love  to  all." 

TO    MISS    M.    H. .    LIGHT    IN    SPIRITUAL    DARKNESS. 

"  Leamington,  March  28th. 
"  Dear  Sister  in  a  most  precious  Jesus, — 

"  I  must  address  you  thus.  Although  a  stranger  to 
3'ou,  I  am  not  a  stranger  to  Him  who  loves  you,  nor  a  stranger 
to  the  road  you  are  now  treading.  As  an  old  pilgrim,  who 
has  walked  the  narrow  way  for  many  years,  and  has  passed 
through  many  trials  and  changes,  I  tliought  I  would  drop  you 
a  line ;  and  perhaps  the  Lord  may  make  it  a  comfort  to  your 
soul,  which  will  not  prevent  my  son,  when  he  is  more  at  leis- 
ure, from  giving  you  his  views  of  your  case.  The  Holy  Ghost 
IS  leading  us — sees  fit  to  guide  us  just  as,  in  His  own  wisdom, 
He  sees  best  for  our  advancement  in  the  Divine  life.  As  I 
have  in  some  measure  trodden  the  dark  path  you  now  tread,  I 
may  be  qualified  to  speak  a  word  in  season  to  you.  The 
changes — oh,  many  there  are  ! — through  which  the  believer 
passes,  are  richly  calculated  to  mature  his  graces,  to  confirm 
him  in  the  truth  of  the  Bible,  and  render  Jesus  more  precious. 
AVe  are  to  follow  on  to  know  the  Lord  ;  and,  in  proportion  as 
we  know  Him,  we  shall  trust  in  Him  in  the  dark  day  as  well 
as  in  the  bright  noon-day,  when  the  sun  of  His  blessed  counte- 
nance is  upon  us.  But  although  your  way  is  now  dark,  there 
is  no  necessity  why  you  should  remain  in  darkness.  The  ear 
of  our  loving  Father  is  open  to  the  cry  of  His  child,  and  His 
heart  is  ever  towards  you.  He  delights  to  hear  you  always; 
and  a  sigli,  a  groan,  a  desire,  is  iyrayei\  though  you  utter  not  a 
word.  Besides,  a  throne  of  grace  is  ever  at  hand  ;  and,  as  you 
Bay  you  cannot  prav,  go  and  tell  Jesus.  Keep  nothing  back 
11 


LIGHT    IX    SPIKITUAL    DARKNESS.  307 

from  your  dearest  and  best  Friend.  He  requires  an  open 
heart.  He  has  given  you  His^  and  He  asks  yours  in  return. 
Have  no  secrets  with  Him,  and  He  will  have  no  secrets  with 
you.  Whatever  your  feelings,  no  matter  how  bad,  take  them 
to  Him ;  for  He  has  engaged  not  only  to  save  you  from  all 
evil,  but  to  save  you  from  yourself. 

"  It  is  no  uncommon  thing  for  God's  beloved  ones,  dear  to 
Him  as  the  apple  of  His  eye,  to  walk  sometimes  in  spiritual 
darkness.  Who  is  among  you  that  fear eth  the  Lord.,  that  oheyeth 
the  voice  of  His  servant,  that  lualketh  in  darhiess,  and  hath  no 
light !  Let  him  trust  in  the  name  of  the  Lord,  and  stay  upon  his 
God.  Not  many  years  ago,  I  was  called  to  walk  in  much 
darkness,  after  a  long  and  blessed  period  of  sweet,  holy,  and 
uninterrupted  enjoyment  of  His  presence.  I  was  greatly  dis- 
tressed. I  searched  diligently  for  the  cause,  and  I  saw  clearly 
enough  why  the  Lord  should  have  hid  from  me  the  light  of 
His  countenance.  In  a  little  while,  I  felt  I  must  flee  from 
myself  to  Jesus.  I  humbled  myself  before  Him,  confessed  my 
sins,  and  gave  Him  no  rest  until  He  appeared  for  me  again, 
and  restored  me  to  the  sweet  enjoyment  of  His  presence.  This 
He  did.  Oh,  the  blessings  of  importunate  prayer !  Think  of 
the  wonderful  condescension  of  God,  to  say  to  us,  '  Command 
ye  me.'  Will  He  withhold  any  good  thing  from  us  ?  You  will, 
perhaps,  reply,  'not  if  we  walk  uprightly.'  Well,  if  we  have 
not,  let  us  go  and  tell  Him  so.  Confession  of  sin  is  one  of  the 
sweet,  holy,  and  profitable  exercises  of  the  soul.  It  endears  us 
to  Christ,  and  endears  Christ  to  us.  It  brings  us  into  a  broken- 
hearted, contrite  communion  with  a  loving,  sympathizing  Sav- 
iour, purifies  the  heart,  and  keeps  the  conscience  tender  and 
watchful.  Have  I  said  enough,  without  wearying  you,  to  induce 
you  to  go  at  once  to  Jesus,  and  lay  bare  your  whole  heart  be- 
fore Him  ?  He  waits  to  be  gracious.  You  need  not  be  long 
in  darkness.  Fervent,  importunate  prayer  will  bring  light  into 
your  soul,  and  Jesus,  with  all  the  tenderness  and  compassion 
of  His  nature,  will  show  you  He  is  yours,  and  that  you  are 
His  through  time  and  eternity.  J,  the  Lord,  change  not.  We 
change,  everything  around  us  changes !  but  our  gracious  God 
and  Father  changes  not.  Go  to  Jesus,  and  all  will  be  well. 
When  He  visits  you,  let  me  know,  that  I  may  praise  Him  on 
your  behalf." 


308  MEMOIR    OF    MIlS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 


to  miss  r .     the  superlative  excellence  of  curist. 

"Dear  Friend, — 

"What  a  high  and  holy  privilege  it  is  to  walk  in 
the  fear  of  the  Lord  all  the  day  long !  And  not  in  the  fear  of 
God  only,  but  also  in  the  love  of  the  Spirit.  I  have  sensible 
access  to  God.  To  listen  to  His  still,  small  voice,  and  to  feel 
an  echo  to  it  in  our  hearts,  is  not  this  a  mighty  privilege,  worth 
a  thousand  worlds  like  this  ?  What  is  all  the  pomp  and  glory 
of  this  dying  world,  compared  with  five  minutes'  such  com- 
munion with  the  Holy  Lord  God,  manifesting  Himself  in  the 
face  of  Jehovah-Jesus?  Beloved,  this  is  your  privilege  and 
mine.  God,  in  His  rich  mercy,  causes  us  to  enjoy  it  every 
day,  and  all  the  day  long.  What  could  we  do  in  this  world 
of  manifold  temptations,  had  we  not  a  God  to  go  to,  ever  ready 
to  be  a  present  help  ?  Suffer  no  distance  to  arise  between  you 
and  your  best  friend.  He  has  undertaken  for  us  in  all  things. 
We  want  Him  as  our  Counsellor,  as  our  Guide,  as  our  Pro- 
tector, as  our  Deliverer,  in  ten  thousand  ways.  How  needful 
and  how  sweet  to  be  ever  sitting  at  His  feet,  looking  up  and 
meeting  His  eye  bending  down  upon  us  in  love  !  I  took  my 
pen  to  address  you,  and  my  thoughts  ran  into  this  subject;  my 
heart  filled,  and  I  could  not  but  express  what  was  passing 
there.  Jesus  is  indeed  very  precious  to  my  soul.  All  creature 
love  sinks  into  nothing  before  it.  If  ever  a  mother  loved  her 
children,  I  have ;  but  what  are  they,  or  all  their  love,  com- 
pared to  Jesus  ?  The  more  I  see  of  the  fulness,  the  boundless 
love  of  Christ,  the  more  I  sink  in  the  dust  of  self-abasement 
before  Him. 

"  And  now  you  are  in  the  house  of  mourning.  If  the  dear 
mother  is  safely  landed,  blessedly  housed  in  the  mansion  long 
prepared  for  her,  should  it  not  be  a  house  of  joy  ?  In  her 
Father's  house  above,  at  home  with  God,  freed  from  all  pain,  sin, 
and  sorrow  for  ever,  saved  from  the  evil  to  come.  What  joy 
were  this  !  Heaven  is  a  i^lace^  and  a  place  of  the  most  perfect 
enjoyment ;  and  the  presence  of  Jesus  makes  it  all  that  an  im- 
mortal soul  can  desire.  Its  happiness,  too,  is  ever  increasing, 
as  well  as  the  capacity  of  the  soul  expanding,  to  receive  and 
enjoy  an  ever-growing  knowledge  of  God.  Were  our  faith 
but  stronger,  we  should  clap  our  hands  when  our  dear  ones 
were  taken  to  their  heavenly  home,  and  say,  with  Mrs.  Isabella 
Graham,    'I  wish  you  joy!'      May  the   Lord  comfort  your 


THE   NEARNESS    OF    HEAVENLY   SPIRITS.  309 

hearts,  and  fill  up  the  void  He  has  made  amongst  you,  and 
cause  you  to  rejoice." 

TO  HER  SOX  0 . 

"  London,  Wednesday. 
"...  We  returned  yesterday  from  Taplow.  The  Lord 
brought  me  in  safety  here  again.  May  He  condescend  to  use 
me  for  Himself  the  little  space  that  is  now  allotted  me  here 
below !  It  seems  as  if  my  time  hitherto  had  gone  to  waste, 
and  I  had  been  an  unprofitable  servant.  May  the  Lord  for- 
give, and   grant  me  all  the  grace   I  need   to  do  His  will !     I 

was  glad  to  find  your  interesting  letter.     Mrs.  W called 

yesterday,  I  gave  her  the  work  on  the  '  Recognition  of  the 
Saints  in  Glory,'  of  which  she  is  doubtful,  and  fears  it  leads  to 
carnality.  She  says  the  '  Glory  of  the  Redeemer '  is  a  great 
source  of  comfort  to  her.     I  have  just  been  pleading  with  the 

Lord  to  make  the  books  a  great  blessing  to  the .       All 

hearts  are  in  the  hands  of  Him  with  whom  we  have  to  do. 
He  can  bless  them.  Oh,  how  many  things  I  have  to  ask  Him 
for !  and  I  believe  He  hears  me  always.  There  is  never  a 
work  to  be  done,  but  Satan  will  endeavour  to  raise  up  an  ad- 
versary. I  have  just  been  reading  the  Lord's  deliverance 
wrought  for  Hezekiah  when  the  Assyrian  king  came  upon 
him.  He  is  the  same  God  now,  never  having  changed  since 
Adam  fell.  Hezekiah's  God  is  our  God.  Let  us  encourage 
our  hearts  in  the  Lord,  and  keep  close  to  a  throne  of  grace. 
Take  care  of  your  health." 

TO  E.  AND  M.  W .       ON    THE   NEARNESS   OF   HEAVENLY 

SPIRITS. 

"  Dear  Friends, —  March  10. 

"Why  have  I  not  heard  from  you  for  so  long  a  time? 
How  is  it  with  your  poor  bodies,  and,  above  all,  how  is  it  with 
your  precious  souls — souls  that  Jesus  loves,  and  for  whom  He 
shed  His  precious  blood?  Oh,  may  we  never  forget  what  it 
cost  the  Son  of  God  to  redeem  us  from  endless  perdition.  We 
must  remember  from  what  we  are  redeemed,  and  to  what  we 
are  redeemed.  Eternal  woe  would  have  been  our  portion  in 
infinite  justice  ;  but  now  eternal  felicity  will  be  our  portion, 
and  that,  too,  on  the  ground  of  infinite  justice.  Bless  the 
Lord  for  His  wondrous  goodness  in  providing  such  a  plan,  by 
which  He  could  be  a  just  God,  and  a  holy  God,  and  yet  save 
lost  and  rebellious  man.     Help  me  to  praise,  and  let  us  en- 


310  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

courage  each  other  to  love  Him  more,  day  by  day.  I  want  to 
love  Him  to-day  better  than  I  did  yesterday,  and  so  through 
an  endless  eternity.  Dear  friends,  how  little,  in  general,  do 
we  think  of  these  things !  The  trifles  of  a  day,  yea,  of  an 
hour,  occupy  our  thoughts,  and  cause  us  to  grovel  here  below. 
Gladly  would  my  soul  be  on  the  wing,  ready  to  mount  upwards 
at  His  bidding.  In  a  little  while,  and  we  shall  see  Him  as 
He  is.  We  know  not  how  soon.  The  heavenly  world  is  all 
around  us,  and  could  we  leave  the  clay,  we  should  behold  the 
air  filled  with  the  heavenly  messengers  sent  down  to  minister 
to  us,  and  to  guard  us  from  the  evil  power  of  darkness.  Oh, 
the  care  of  the  Good  Shepherd  !  His  wakeful  eye  is  ever 
upon  us,  and  His  loving  heart  is  ever  towards  us. 

"  .  .  .  Since  I  last  wrote  I  have  had  a  severe  attack  of 
influenza.  It  is  the  Lord,  and  a  part  of  the  discipline  of  the 
covenant.  .  .  .  And  now  I  must  hasten  to  close.  Let  us 
take  courage,  and  press  onward,  keeping  our  happy  home  in 
view.  In  a  little  while,  and  we  shall  be  there.  Let  me  hear 
from  you  both.  I  hope  the  dear  invahd  is  better.  Never 
mind.  We  shall  have  new  bodies,  more  beauteous  than  the 
brightest  angel  in  heaven,  and  standing,  too,  nearer  to  the 
Saviour  than  they.  Oh,  I  Avould  encourage  you  both,  dear, 
dear  sisters,  and  myself,  too,  in  anticipating  the  glory  that 
awaits  us !  .     .     .  " 

TO    THE    SAME ON    TELLING   JESUS. 

"I  have  thought  much  of  you  both,  beloved  in  the  Lord, 
and  wished  to  tell  you  so,  but  we  have  been  in  much  anxiety 
on  dear  E 's  account,  who  has  had  an  attack  of  inflamma- 
tion on  the  lungs.     .     .     .     0 was  to  have  accompanied 

his  brother  to  New  York  on  business,  but  her  illness  prevented, 
and  the  steamer  leaves  to-day  without  them.  So  the  Lord  has 
ordered  it.  Praise  to  His  holy  name,  who  hedges  up  our  way, 
sometimes  with  thorns.  Oh,  we  shall  see,  when  w^e  arrive  in 
heaven,  how  wonderful  has  been  the  wisdom  that  has  guided 
us  in  all  our  journey  through  !  Only  realize  your  oneness  to 
Him,  then  you  may  be  quite  certain  that  all  that  takes  place, 
small  or  great,  is  in  that  covenant  that  is  ordered  in  all  things 
and  sure.  Nothing  is  uncertain  with  God.  We  walk  by  faith 
in  Him,  and  not  by  sight.  Oh,  carry  all  your  wants  to  Him, 
nothing  doubting  that  He  not  only  hears  you,  but  is  every 
moment  watching  over  you!     All  is  well,  and  though  dark 


A   GOOD    MINISTER    OF    CHRIST.  3ll 

clouds  come  between,  there  is  a  bright  h'ght  behind  them.  Go 
at  once  with  your  trouble,  be. it  Avhat  it  may;,  nothing  is  too 
trivial  to  carry  to  Him.  In  this  you  honour  Christ,  showing 
you  believe  His  words,  Without  me  ye  can  do  7iothing.  Now, 
then,  Jesus  Avill  do  all  things  for  you,  and  all  things  well.  A 
sparrow  falls  not  to  the  groimd  without  Him.     You  are  of 

more  value  than  many   sparrows.     E is  better.     Oh,  it 

has  been,  I  trust,  a  time  of  deep  searching  of  heart !  She 
was  left  alone  with  God.  Solemn  thought !  "We  often  need 
be  compelled  to  turn  aside  with  God,  and  hear  what  He  wnll 
say  to  us.  "We  want  no  intruders  there.  We  want  to  speak 
to  God  alone.  Oh,  doubt  not  that  God  does  even  now  speak 
to  His  saints  by  the  still  small  voice  of  His  Spirit,  so  that  we 
can  respond,  Speak,  Lord,  for  thy  servant  heareth.  He  openeth 
the  ear  to  discipjline  ;  and  how  sweet  it  is  to  wait  and  listen,  to 
hear  what  God  would  say  to  us.  Be  not  satisfied  with  pray- 
ing, but  wait  for  the  answer,  for  it  will  come  in  some  way. 
Let  me  have  a  line,  I  always  remember  you  (one  time  in  the 
day,  perhaps,)  in  my  prayers." 

TO    HER    SOX    O ,    ON    A    GOOD    MINISTER    OF    CHRIST. 

"  How  often  it  is,  that  while  God  is  in  His  own  way  answer- 
ing our  prayers,  unbelief  will  mist  our  eyes,  and  tempt  us  to 
fret  and  repine  at  His  dispensations,  not  thinking  that  this  is 
the  way  He  takes  to  accomplish  what  Ave  wish.  Last  Lord's- 
day  was  very  refreshing  to  my  soul.  I  went  into  the  sanctu- 
ary, and  then  the  Lord  gave  me  a  little  insight  into  His  doings. 
.  .  .  Do  you  recollect  what  I  wrote  to  you,  that  a  dear, 
aged  Baptist  minister  once  remarked,  that  '  when  God  means 
to  make  a  man  rich.  He  takes  away  his  money  ?'  How  often 
we  think  we  could  do  the   Lord's  work  better  than   He  can 

Himself!     F sent  his  carriage  to  take  me  to  Mr.  C 's 

yesterday,  where  I  spent  most  of  the  forenoon.  What  a  dear, 
precious  Christian  he  is  !  I  think  He  is  one  of  the  most  lovely 
saints  I  ever  met  with.  His  gifts  for  the  ministry  are  not 
great,  but  what  he  has  he  honestly  lays  out  in  the  service  of 
the  Lord — his  whole  heart  devoted  to  Him,  and  his  whole  hfe 
a  constant  aim  to  glorify  Him.  Holy,  upright,  walking  closely 
with  God,  and  evidently  experiencing  much  of  the  approving 
smiles  of  the  Saviour.  And  although  his  holy  fear  of  offend- 
ing may  incline  a  little  at  times  to  legality,  it  is  yet  a  most 
lovely  spectacle  to  behold.     He  will  receive  a  Well  done,  good 


312  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

and  faithful  servant,  thou  hast  been  faithful  over  a  few  things^ 
enter  thou  into  the  joy  of  thy  Lord. 

"...  Oh,  to  look  into  eternity,  and  in  its  light  to  see 
the  folly  and  madness  of  ungodly  men.  How  do  I  long  for 
the  end  of  all  things ;  for  the  coming  of  the  Lord  to  put  all 
things  straight !  for  even  the  Church  of  Christ  has  wandered 
far  from  the  right  way,  and  has  greatly  dishonoured  her  Head. 
.     .     .     I  found  it  very  sweet  to  meet  at  the  Lord's  Table. 

Dear  Mr.  E recognised  me,  and  gave  me  one  or  two  of 

his  kind  looks,  but  I  was  too  much  engaged  with  Him,  who  is 
one  ocean  of  love  to  my  soul,  to  take  much  notice.  He 
returned  thanks  to  the  Lord  for  preserving  me  in  the  time  of 
danger,  and  for  bringing  me  among  them  again.     When  will 

the  book  be  out  ?     I  long  to  see  it.     Love  to  A and  the 

dear  chicks." 


to  miss  j ,  soothing  thoughts  in  illness. 

"  Dear  Friend  and  Sister, — 

"  I  hear  that  you  are  not  well.  Do  drop  me,  if  only  a 
few  lines,  and  tell  me  all  about  yourself.  Oh,  dear  friend,  the 
world  is  one  vast  hospital  filled  with  diseased  inmates,  and 
only  one  class  can  ever  hope  for  a  perfect  cure.  We  shall  all 
be  well  when  we  get  above.  This  is  not  our  rest,  nor  our 
home.  We  seek  a  better,  and,  blessed  be  God,  our  best  Friend 
is  preparing  it  for  us.  When  we  get  there,  we  shall  find  it 
far  beyond  our  highest  and  most  enlarged  expectations.  Oh, 
help  me  to  praise  and  bless  His  holy,  holy  name !  .  .  .  . 
There  are  seasons  when,  alone  in  my  little  sanctuary  in  this 
house,  I  am  favoured  with  such  precious  glimpses  of  the  glory 
that  awaits  the  Christian,  that  I  could  shout  aloud.  It  is  all 
true!  The  atmosphere  between  this  world  and  the  other 
seems  clearer  and  lighter,  and  but  a  step  and  I  am  there. 
What  a  meeting  around  that  great  white  throne,  basking  in 
the  glory  emanating  from  the  countenance  of  Him  who  so, 
loved  you  and  me  as  to  live  for  us,  to  die  for  us,  and  to  live 
again,  and  to  say,  Because  I  live  ye  shall  live  also.  Oh,  let  us 
encourage  each  other  in  the  way !  Our  poor  bodies,  too,  will 
be  raised  again,  glorious  bodies,  beautified  and  prepared  for 
the  reception  of  the  glorified  spirit.  The  prospect  is  opening 
fast  before  me.  Satan  would  try  hard  to  mystify,  or  withdraw 
us  from  the   simplicity   of  the  Drecious  Gospel.     But  let  us 


TO    A    FRIEND,    ON    HER    CONVERSION.  313 

come  to  Jesus,  and  bring  to  Him  all  our  cares,  large  and  small, 
and  tell  Him  all  that  is  in  our  hearts. 

"  P.S.  I  am  still  at  L ,  and  thank  God  for  giving  me 

such  a  home  for  the  little  while  I  am  here.  I  am  fed  with  the 
sincere  milk  of  the  precious  Gospel,  by  him  whom  the  Lord 
gave  me  in  infancy  to  nurse  for  Himself.  I  am  watched  over 
with  the  tenderest  care,  as  a  babe  that  can  do  little  for  itself. 
I  have  no  care.  I  talk  to  Jesus,  and  tell  Him  all  I  wish  and 
all  I  want.  Sweet  to  close  the  door,  and  admit  Him  to  my 
heart,  confessing  my  sins  again  and  again — the  sins  of  my 
Avhole  life,  as  the  Holy  Spirit  brings  them  to  remembrance. 
Repentance,  I  find,  is  not  a  thing  once  done,  and  ever  after 
done  with.  Oh  no  !  I  go  again  and  again,  as  sin  arises  in  the 
mind,  lay  myself  at  the  feet  of  Jesus,  there  to  confess,  weep, 
and  love — no  rebuke,  all  pardoned.  Oh,  the  wondrous,  the 
ocean-like  love  of  Jesus  !  "\Ylio  can  fathom  it  ?  Dear  friend, 
we  can  have  some  little  glimpses  elsewhere  of  Heaven.  Cheer 
up  !  we  shall  meet  above,  and  spend  an  endless  eternity  to- 
gether. Oh,  what  a  gathering  there !  I  love  to  anticipate  it, 
and  do,  in  a  measure,  realize  it.  How  beautiful  they  look 
clothed  in  the  wedding  garment,  clean  and  white, — the  infinite 
righteousness  of  Christ  Himself  Why  should  we  not  rejoice  ? 
Let  not  the  enemy  keep  you  back.  "When  he  comes  in  like  a 
flood,  go  directly  to  Jesus,  and  He  will  fight  your  battles. 
Let  us  pray  for  one  another.     Once  more,  farewell ! 

*  For  us  the  Lord  intends 

A  bright  abode  on  high ; 

The  place  where  sorrow  ends, 

And  nought  is  known  but  joy  ; 
With  such  a  hope  let  us  rejoice, 
We  soon  shall  hear  the  Bridegroom's  voice.'  " 

TO    MRS.  C.  W.  J ,   ON    HER    CONVERSION. 

**  My  dear  Friend, — 

"Although  so  lately  known  to  me,  yet  having  seen 
how  blessedly  Jesus — my  Jesus  and  your  Jesus — has  drawn 
you  to  Himself,  I  can  and  do  rejoice  over  you  as  one  of  the 
redeemed  of  the  Lord,  and  a  willing  candidate  for  a  crown  of 
glory.  Oh,  dear  friend,  let  no  man  take  your  crown.  Watch 
and  pray  that  you  enter  not  into  temptation.  You  and  Christ 
are  one.  You  are  now  called  out  of  the  world's  wide  wilder- 
ness, and  you  have  taken  up  the  cross  to  follow  Jesus.  Yoii 
are  now  a  soldier  of  the  cross,  and  it  is  written,  Fight  the  good 
14 


314  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

fight  of  faith;  lay  hold  of  eternal  life.  AYhat  an  honour  to  be 
called,  as  you  have  been,  to  own  your  Lord  and  Saviour  be- 
fore a  gainsaying,  Christ  denying  world !  For  this  you  can 
never  be  grateful  enough, 

"  Oh,  to  grace  l)o\v  great  a  debtor 
Daily  I'm  constrain'd  to  be  ! 
Let  that  grace.  Lord,  like  a  fetter, 
Bind  my  wandering  heart  to  thee." 

Oh,  that  Jesus  might  indeed  bind  you  to  Himself  with  cords 
of  love  !  Never  forget  that  you  and  Jesus  are  one.  All  your 
concerns  are  His  concerns.  All  your  cares  are  equally  his 
cares.  Therefore  you  are  to  be  careful  for  nothing,  for  He 
careth  for  you.  See  what  an  honour  it  is  to  be  a  child  of  God, 
and  to  have  grace  given  to  walk  boldly  forth  and  own  Him  as 
your  Saviour,  Sovereign,  and  PViend.  I  do,  indeed,  rejoice 
with  you,  and  rejoice  over  you.  Hold  fost  your  profession. 
You  must  expect  to  meet  with  scoffers,  and  those  who  would 
lead  you  far  from  Jesus.  But  cling  firmly  to  Him,  and  hold 
fast  to  His  word.  I  would  say  here,  that  confession  of  sin  is 
a  most  sanctifying  exercise  of  the  soul.  When  you  feel  in 
your  heart  that  you  liaA'-e  grieved  the  Spirit,  at  once  confess  it 
to  your  dearest,  best  Friend  ;  and  He  will,  by  the  application 
of  His  own  precious  blood,  not  only  give  a  sense  of  pardon, 
and  grace,  but  will  strengthen  your  faith  and  confidence  in 
Himself.  Do  not  forget  this.  It  is  of  consequence  that  you 
do  not.  Let  me  write  to  you  as  a  tender  mother  would  to  her 
beloved  child.  I  have  felt  all  this  toward  you.  And  oh,  the 
prayers  I  have  offered  up  for  you !  You  will  never  know  un- 
til you  get  to  glory.  Let  me  meet  you  there,  beloved  friend. 
I  bear  you  in  my  best  afiections.  When  you  meet  with  suf- 
ferings, remember  your  dear  Lord  met  with  such  before  you ; 
and  it  is  a  great  honour  put  upon  you  to  be  as  He  was  in  this 

present  evil  world.     I  do  not  wonder  that said  that  you 

had  '  united  yourself  to  a  vulgar  religion,'  for  so  said  the  mul- 
titude when  Jesus  was  on  earth,  and  when  the  Apostles  went 
forth  to  preach  Christ.  The  religion  of  Christ  is  not  the  relig- 
ion of  the  world,  but  is  in  opposition  to  the  world,  and  there- 
fore the  world  will  ever  hate  it  and  its  followers.  But  there  is 
a  cross  Christ's  true  disciples  have  to  take  up.  Ask  the  Lord 
to  strengthen,  uphold,  and  comfort  you. 

"  P.S.     The  following  lines,  dear  friend,  suit  you  : — 


SOUL    DARKNESS.  .315 

'Jesus,  I  my  cross  have  taken, 

All  to  leave  and  follow  Thee; 
All  things  else  for  thee  forsaken, 

Thou  from  hence  my  all  shalt  be. 

'  Perish  every  fond  ambition, 

All  I've  sought,  or  hoped,  or  knovm, 

Yet  how  rich  is  my  condition, 

God  and  heaven  are  still  my  own  ! 

*  Let  the  world  despise  and  leave  me, 

It  has  left  my  Saviour  too ; 
Human  hearts  and  looks  deceive  me, 
Thou  art  not,  like  them,  untrue. 

*  And  whilst  Thou  dost  smile  upon  me, 

God  of  wisdom,  love,  and  might. 
Foes  may  hate,  and  friends  disown  me, 
Show  Thy  face,  and  all  is  bright. 

Go,  thou  eartlily  fame  and  treasure, 
Come  disaster,  scorn,  and  pain, 
In  'J'hy  service  pain  is  pleasure, 
With  Thy  favour  loss  is  gain. 

*  I  have  call'd  Thee,  Abba  Father, 

I  have  set  my  heart  on  Tliee ; 
Storms  may  howl,  and  clouds  may  gather, 
All  must  work  for  good  to  me.' 

"The  enclosed  Paper  on  'Religious  Progression,"  I  had 
printed.  "We  are  to  go  forward.  The  Christian's  watch-word 
is — Follow  on  to  know  the  Lord.  You  have  just  commenced 
your  heavenly  race.  You  are  to  go  on  to  know  more  of  this 
great  and  glorious  salvation.  May  the  Lord  Jesus  teach  you, 
and  bless  you  w^ith  much  of  His  sensible  presence." 

to  mr.  w.  d.  l ,   in  soul  darkness. 

"Dear  Brother  in  Jesus, — 

"  I  think  I  must  write  a  line  to  you ;  I  have  long 
wished  it,  but  did  not  know  how  to  intrude  myself  upon  you. 
My  dear  son  has  sometimes  given  me  a  sight  of  your  kind 
letters,  which  has  led  me  to  lift  up  my  heart  to  the  Lord  in 
heaven  to  bless  you,  and  to  cause  His  face  to  shine  upon  you, 
filling  you  with  joy  and  peace  in  believing.  The  love  of  God's 
saints  to  each  other  is  as  far  superior  to  the  natural  love  of 
relationship,  or  to  the  common  friendship  of  the  world,  as  the 
heavens  are  higher  than  the  earth.  This  love  emanates  from 
God.     It  is  a  Divine  cement   that  unites  the  one  family  of 


316  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

heaven.  TVe  know  lue  have  passed  from  death  unto  life,  because 
lue  love  the  hrethren.  How  sweet  is  tliis  most  precious  evidence 
of  our  sonship  !  Hail  it,  dear  friend,  as  a  grand  evidence  of 
God's  eternal,  everlasting  love  to  you.  I  have  passed  my 
threescore  years  and  ten,  and  am  looking  out  for  the  messenger 
from  my  Father's  house  to  bring  me  to  my  happy,  blessed 
home.  It  is  almost  in  sight.  I  am  favoured  Avith  some 
precious  glimpses  of  the  glory  that  awaits  me.  .  .  .  Oh, 
to  come  to  Jesus  just  as  we  would  have  done  when  He  walked 
with  His  disciples  here  below !  '  Precious  Jesus,  Thou  Son  of 
God,  bless  my  young  friend,  and  lift  up  upon  him  the  light  of 
Thy  countenance,  and  say,  It  is  I,  be  not  afraid.^  My  heart  is 
full  of  love  towards  you.  I  think  I  know  a  little  of  the  road 
by  which  the  Lord  is  leading  you  at  this  moment.  Oh,  let  us  bow 
our  neck  to  the  cross,  for  Jesus  is  walking  with  us  every  step 
of  the  way !  .  .  .  When  tried,  rush  at  once  into  the  very 
bosom  of  Christ,  and  feel  the  warm  pulsations  of  His  own 
loving  heart,  and  rest  your  head  there.  All  will  be  well.  He 
is  with  you  now,  and  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  you.  Pray 
for  us,  and  may  the  richest  blessings  rest  upon  you,  beloved 
friend.' 

to  e.  s .     encouragement  to  come  to  jesus. 

"Dear  Sufferer, — 

"  How  have  I  thought  of  you  since  last  evening;  you 
looked  so  ill !  My  long  letter,  written  some  days  ago,  would 
not,  I  fear,  be  of  much  comfort  to  your  heart.  But  Jesus 
loves  you,  and  He  will  comfort  you,  I  know.  One  glance  of 
His  loving  eye  beaming  upon  your  inmost  soul  will  be  all- 
sufficient  for  your  peace,  and  rich  consolation  under  your 
present  suffering  of  body.  The  body  is  but  the  casement  to 
the  jewel,  which  is  rich  and  valuable  enough  to  place  in  the 
crown  of  Him  Avho  died  and  who  rose  again,  and  who  at  this 
moment  is  seated  on  His  throne  in  glory,  waiting  to  welcome 
all  who  feel  their  need  of  Him,  and  can  do  nothing  for  them- 
selves. It  is  upon  such,  Jesus  has  His  loving  eye.  While 
you  think  you  will  try  and  do  your  best  to  please  God,  you  will 
find  you  will  come  short,  and  will  be  weary  of  your  efforts. 
But  when  you  cast  yourself,  in  all  your  helplessness,  upon  His 
mercy  and  power,  and  His  word  which  says.  Come  unto  me, 
all  ye  that  labour  and  are  heavy  laden,  and  I  loill  give  you  rest, 
then,   my  beloved  friend,  you  will  find  Jesus,  the  Saviour  of 


THE    DESIRE    TO    LOVE    CHRIST    PRECIOUS.  317 

sinners,  all  that  He  has  said  He  is,  and  ever  will  be,  to  every 
needj  one  who  looks  to  Him  for  help.  A  glance,  a  sigh,  a 
desire.  He  never,  no  never  will  overlook.  His  heart  is  one 
ocean  of  love — love  to  sinners,  as  sinners,  not  as  saints.  He 
loves  the  saints  too,  but  He  first  loves  them  as  poor,  lost  sinners, 
that  can  do  nothing  for  themselves,  and  who  come  to  Him  to 
be  saved.  Oh,  how  welcome  you  are  now,  just  in  your  present 
state  of  mind,  to  the  heart  of  Jesus !  His  heart  is  yearning 
over  you  at  this  present  moment.  I  will  say  no  more.  I  have 
been  to  prayer  for  you,  dear  friend,  for  you  are  laid  much  upon 
my  heart." 

TO    THE    SAME. THE    DESIRE    TO    LOVE    CHRIST    PRECIOUS. 

"  Do  not  attempt  to  answer  my  note  of  yesterday  ;  there  is 
no  necessity  for  it.  I  only  thought  I  would  give  a  word  of 
comfort  in  your  trouble.  The  poor  body's  necessities  call  for 
all  your  energies  and  patience,  without  having  to  write  and 
answer  notes.  Be  assured  of  this  truth, — you  would  never 
have  had  a  wish  to  love  Jesus  if  He  had  not  first  loved  you. 
That  love  is  divine  in  its  character,  and  springs  from  the  power 
of  the  Holy  Spirit.  It  never  grew  in  nature's  soil — it  is  above 
and  beyond  fallen  nature.  It  comes  from  Christ,  and  quick 
returns  are  made  to  Christ.  And  if  we  have  but  one  spark  in 
our  souls,  it  will  kindle  into  a  holy  flame.  Oh,  to  be  a  living 
member  of  Christ's  living  body !  We  are  the  members,  and 
He  is  the  Head,  These  are  great  mysteries,  which  you  will 
better  understand  as  you  travel  on  in  the  narrow  road  that 
leads  to  the  land  of  glory.  Go  with  all  you  want  to  Jesus — 
keep  nothing  back.  Gro  with  all  the  simplicity  of  a  babe,  and 
tell  Jesus.  He  will  bow  down  His  loving  ear,  and  listen  to 
all  you  have  to  say  to  Him.  I  must  not  weary  you,  but  finish 
with  what  I  began  with — that  if  you  have  the  faintest  wish 
throbbing  in  your  heart  to  love  Jesus,  it  is  one  of  the  sweetest 
evidences  that  you  can  have  that  He  first  loved  you.  Now, 
the  more  you  know  Him,  and  have  to  do  with  Him,  the  more 
you  will  love  Him." 

TO  HER  SON  O ,  ON  THE  SUDDEN  DEATH  OF  A  DEAR 

FRIEND. 

"  Saturday  Evening. 
"  I  received  yours  this  afternoon.     I  saw,  by  the  papers  this 
morning,  that  Mrs.  Alers  Hankey  had  gone  to  her  happy 


318  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

home,  and  imaiediately  wrote,  as  the  Spirit  led  me,  a  word  of 
comfort  to  the  afflicted  daughters.  She  is  safe,  I  have  not  the 
shade  v.-  of  a  d;3iibt.  She  is  with  Jesus,  Little  faith  can  get  to 
heaven.  It  was  a  happy  dismissal,  just  such  a  one  as,  in  all 
her  w(aknes^  and  trembling,  suited  her,  sparing  her  much 
bodily  and  mental  suffering.  How  much  do  I  see  the  tender 
love  and  sy, apathy  of  Christ  in  deahng  with  her  thus  !  He 
knew  all  h?r  feebleness,  and  how  Satan  would  attempt  to 
harass  her  in  a  lingering  illness ;  and  so  He  took  her  away  as 
in  a  deep  sleep  ;  and  before  she  knew  that  she  was  dying  she 
was  safely  1  .>dged  within  His  loving  bosom.  Oh,  the  goodness 
and  gentleness  of  Jesus — our  God-man  Mediator !  How 
beautiful  does  the  tender  sympathy  of  the  manhood  appear  in 
its  union  with  the  power  and  glory  of  the  Godhead !  Such  is 
Christ  to  me.  .  .  .  Every  now  and  then,  the  thought  of 
the  gracious  dealings  of  our  God  towards  dear  Mrs.  Hankey, 
as  it  respects  her  sudden  and  gentle  dismissal,  passes  over  me 
with  much  sweetness !  What  a  realizing  view  it  gives  me  of 
the  exquisite  character  of  Jesus — His  gentleness,  tenderness, 
and  sympathy  !  Oh,  how  enviable  such  a  death !  Let  me  die 
the  death  of  the  righteous,  and  let  my  last  end  he — just  as  He 
would  have  it.  Only  would  I  say,  '  Let  me  see  Thy  face  all 
through  the  dark  valley.'  My  soul  at  this  moment  rejoices  in 
God  my  Saviour.  He  is  all  to  me,  living  or  dying.  The  last 
time  I  saw  dear  Mrs.  Hankey,  she  sat  listening  with  the 
deepest  attention,  and  with  tearful  ej^es.  And  when  we  parted, 
she  kindly  drew  me  towards  her,  and  kissed  me  affection- 
ately." 

"  Lord's-day. — This  clause  in  one  of  the  Psalms  has  been 
very  sweet  to  me  to-day :  For  God  is  for  me.  What,  then, 
need  the  believer  fear,  here  or  hereafter  ?  This  is  His  comfort. 
Christ  and  he  are  one  in  time  and  in  eternity.  Looking  into 
'Bridge  on  Faith,'  these  words  met  my  ej-e :  'Suffering  times 
are  self-recollecting  times.'  And  we  may  add,  suffering  times 
are,  or  ought  to  be,  fruitful,  growing  times.  Every  branch 
that  beareth  fruit,  He  purgeth  it  that  it  may  bring  forth  more 

fruit.     Oh,  that  it  may  be  so  with  dear  E and  me  !     I 

have  followed  you  Avith  my  prayers  to-day,  that  the  Lord 
might  heal  the  sick,  strengthen  the  w^eak,  and  bless  His  own 
word  to  saints  and  sinners.     Love  to  all." 

What  pen  could  have  given  so  faithful  a  delineation  of  her 
elevated  Christianity  as  her  own  has  unconsciously  presented 


THE   REALITY    OF   TRUE   RELIGION.  319 

in  the  foregoing  utterances  of  her  heart  ?  The  impression  on 
the  mind  of  the  reader  must  be,  how  real  is  true  rehgion,  and 
how  earnest  is  its  spirit !  And  yet  tliere  is  nothing  in  that  re- 
ligion, as  thus  exhibited,  that  the  lowHest  subject  of  grace  may 
not  experience.  Precious  is  the  sentiment  with  which  the 
chapter  closes — "  little  faith  can  get  to  heaven." 


CHAPTER    XIII. 

"As  the  sunbeams  united  in  a  burning  glass  to  a  point 
liave  greater  force  than  when  they  are  darted  from  a  plain 
superfice,  so  the  virtues  and  actions  of  one  individual,  drawn 
together  into  a  single  story,  strike  upon  our  minds  a  stronger 
and  more  Hvely  impression  tlian  the  scattered  relations  of 
many  men  and  many  actions."*  It  is  upon  this  principle  of 
concentration,  for  whose  discovery  we  are  indebted  to  the 
Bible,  that  God  has  condescended  to  reveal  Himself  to  man. 
In  the  person  of  His  Son  He  has  so  embodied  the  perfections 
of  His  nature,  and  has  so  concentrated  the  beams  of  His 
majesty,  as  to  present  in  focal  grandeur  the  "light  of  the 
knowledge  of  the  glory  of  God  in  the  face  of  Jesus  Christ." 
In  picturing  the  sunset  of  a  life  so  prolonged  and  honoured  of 
God  as  that  which  these  pages  record,  it  will  be  our  endeavour, 
as  that  life  approaches  its  close,  thus  to  collect  and  concentrate 
its  retiring  beams,  intercepting  them  only  so  far  as  a  gentle 
hand  may  be  required  to  guide  them  to  the  focus.  It  is  a  rich 
autumnal  sunset  we  are  about  to  contemplate.  The  'sear  and 
yellow  leaf  is  falling  thick  and  fast;  but  in  the  hngering  fresh- 
ness and  fertility,  the  reader  will  be  reminded  of  the  character 
appertaining  to  the  aged  godly,  so  beautifully  delineated  by 
the  sacred  penman, — "  The  righteous  shall  flourish  like  the 
palm  tree :  he  shall  grow  like  a  cedar  in  Lebanon.  Those 
that  be  planted  in  the  house  of  the  Lord  shall  flourish  in  the 
courts  of  our  God.  They  shall  still  bring  forth  fruit  in  old 
age ;  they  shall  be  fat  and  flourishing ;  to  shew  that  the  Lord 
is  upright."  It  is  the  remark  of  an  elegant  writer,  and  the 
sentiment  is  not  less  true  than  beautiful, — "Cheerful  piety  in 
the  decline  of  life,  is  like  a  tree  which  the  storm  has  shattered, 
but  which  yet  retains  much  of  the  verdure  of  summer,  and  is 
still  the  resort  of  the  birds  which  sing  among  the  branches." 

*  Addison. 
[820J 


DIARY.  321 

These  pleasant  characteristics  of  religion  in  old  age  will  be  re- 
cognised in  the  extracts  we  proceed  to  make  from  Mrs.  "Wins- 
low's  diary  and  correspondence,  indicating  an  extraordinary 
elevation  of  spiritual  feeling,  blended  with  a  solemn  yet  radiant 
consciousness  of  her  nearness  to  the  glory  within  which  she 
was  soon  to  pass.  Our  first  quotations  are  from  the  private 
journal  which  has  supplied  us  with  so  much  rich  material,  but 
which,  alas  !  is  soon  to  receive  its  final  record  of  a  pilgrimage 
from  earth  to  heaven. 

"  Leamington. — I  could  never  have  believed  that  I  should 
have  such  nearness  to  Jesus,  as  I  now,  at  times,  enjoy.  Read 
this  morning  the  twenty-first  of  John,  from  the  4th,  particu- 
larly pausing  at  the  12th  verse,  Jesus  saith  unto  them,  Come 
and  dine.  His  care.  His  forethought  of  His  disciples,  is  now 
just  what  it  was  when  this  circumstance  took  place.  He  had 
watched  the  fruitless  labour  of  His  disciples  through  the  night 
— they  had  caught  nothing.  Just  at  this  juncture,  when 
weary,  discouraged,  and  hungry,  He  appeared.  They  needed 
refreshment — He  was  not  unmindful  of  it.  Coals  were  kin- 
dled— fish  was  laid  thereon,  bread  was  provided — nothing 
omitted  suitable  to  their  wants.  And  then  they  were  invited 
to  dine.  They  need  not  ask,  Who  art  thou  ?  The  multitude 
of  fishes  they  had  caught  at  His  word,  the  repast  He  had  pro- 
vided— the  invitation  He  had  given — all  proclaimed  who  He 
was — their  dearest  friend.  Is  it  not  so  with  thee,  O  my  soul? 
Has  Jesus  ever  been  unmindful  of  thy  wants?  Never,  no 
never.  Always  ready  to  supply  my  need.  He  has  gone  before 
me  in  the  wilderness,  and  prepared  a  table  for  me.  Remem- 
bering the  thorn  and  the  briar,  He  has  made  a  narrow  road  for 
,  my  feet,  saying,  Folloiv  thou  me  !  Had  I  ever  need  to  inquire. 
Who  art  thou,  Lord  ?  Did  I  not  know  Him  ?  Yes  !  Even  now 
I  feel  His  presence.  I  know  the  person,  and  I  hear  the  voice. 
How  sweet,  how  cheering,  how  comforting !  To  be  with 
Jesus,  and  to  know  it !  With  such  a  visit  have  I  been  favoured 
this  day.  Oh,  what  little  things  do  worlds  appear,  when  so 
blessed !  W^ondrous  in  all  His  dealings  has  Christ  been  to  me. 
Chosen  in  Him  before  the  foundation  of  the  world,  in  due  time 
called,  justified,  sanctified,  and  shall  be  soon  and  eternally 
glorified." 

"  The  Lord  does  wonderfully  seem  to  let  heaven  down  into 
my  soul.  I  have  no  power  to  describe  it.  Then  does  heaven 
i|-3elf  seem  so  inviting,  so  attractive.  I  feel  it  but  a  step,  and 
14* 


322  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

I  am  in  the  midst  of  happiness,  perfect  and  supreme.  I  have 
asked  the  Lord  not  to  send  the  grim,  pale  messenger  for  me, 
unless  he  comes  with  him.  I  must  see  His  own,  well-known 
face,  ere  I  can  welcome  the  summons.  Oh,  to  be  in  His  bosom, 
there  to  rest  without  a  fear  or  misgiving — to  pass  through  that 
dark  valley  in  His  own  loving,  Almighty  arms,  reposing  upon 
His  very  heart !  May  this  be  my  case.  He  so  condescend- 
ingly answers  my  poor  prayers,  and  in  a  way  so  remarkable, 
that  were  I  to  tell  some  individuals,  they  would  declare  it  a 
delusion.  But  I  know  otherwise.  Every  precious  word  He 
has  spoken  is  true.  My  soul  rejoices  in  God  my  Saviour,  my 
Friend,  my  Father.  I  shall  see  Him — see  Him  as  He  is ;  be 
like  Him ;  dwell  with  Him  through  eternity,  in  perfect  knowl- 
edge, perfect  purity,  perfect  happiness,  perfect  glory.  Precious 
Jesus,  Thou  knowest  all  things ;  Thou  knowest  that  I  love 
Thee.  And  though,  like  Peter,  I  have  often  wandered  from 
Thee,  yet  Thou  hast  never  left  me,  nor  denied  Thyself.  Glory 
be  to  thy  dear  and  holy  name." 

"  How  gracious,  how  transcendently  good  has  the  Lord  been 
to  me  this  day !  The  20th  Psalm  was  made  a  rich  blessing  to 
my  soul.  How  wonderfully  does  the  Lord  reveal  Himself 
through  His  own  word  to  the  heart  and  conscience  of  His 
children  !  Truly  is  His  loving  ear  open  to  the  faintest  cry  of 
His  feeble  ones — such  condescension  in  stooping  to  catch  their 
faintest  breath  of  prayer !  Language  seems  to  fail,  when  the 
heart  is  thus  filled  with  the  Spirit,  to  express  its  deep  emo- 
tions— the  feelings  of  a  broken  and  a  contrite  spirit.  Never, 
no  never,  does  sin  appear  so  hateful  as  when  the  Lord  comes 
down  to  bless.  Prostrate  at  His  feet  I  fall,  love  and  sorrow 
so  strangely  mingled  that  they  cannot  be  separated.  Oh,  for- 
a  close  walk  throughout  this  day,  my  eyes  and  heart  fixed 
upon  Jesus — Jesus  risen !  He  that  was  dead,  is  now  alive, 
and  reigns  upon  the  throne  above ;  all  power  on  earth  and  in 
heaven  is  His.  With  Him  I  shall  dwell  throughout  eternity — 
blessed  thought !  Precious  Jesus  !  heaven  would  be  no  heaven, 
wert  Thou  not  there.  Not  all  I  love  on  earth,  were  I  to  meet 
them,  could  compensate  for  the  loss  of  Thyself.  Lord,  help 
me  this  day  to  pass  through  its  cares  without  contamination, 
upheld  by  the  Spirit.  I  am  all  weakness ;  with  Thee  is  all 
power.  Help  Thy  weak  one,  and  leave  me  not  to  myself. 
Take  my  whole  heart  and  soul  in  Thy  hands,  and  order  all  my 
goings,  for  Thine  honour's  sake." 


DIARY.  323 

"  Tuesday. — The  text  this  morning  was  from  Song  of  Solo- 
mon ii.  10  :  My  beloved  spake^  and  said  unto  me,  Rise  up,  my 
love,  my  fair  one,  and  come  away.  .  .  .  The  Lord  is 
pleased  to  enable  me  to  hear  without  excitement.  Surely  He 
has  heard  my  prayer,  and  answered  it.  And  not  only  so,  but 
in  blessing  the  word  to  my  soul.  Every  word  seems  to  tell ; 
and  to  all  my  heart  can  echo  its  sincere  Amen.  Oh,  what 
cause  for  thankfulness  is  this !  His  dear  name  shall  have  all 
the  glory." 

"Wednesday  Evening. — The  text  this  evening  -was  from 
Phil.  iv.  19:  My  God  shall  supply  all  your  need  according  to 
His  riches  in  glory  hy  Christ  Jesus.  ...  A  word  to  the 
rich  and  the  poor  of  the  flock.  We  have  a  spiritual  and  a 
temporal  need  ;  both  supplied  in  and  by  Christ  Jesus,  in  whom 
God  has  treasured  up  a  fulness  adequate  to  all  the  wants  of 
His  bride.  His  beloved,  His  fair  one,  whom  He  invites  to  rise 
up  and  come  away.  Glory  is  prepared  for  her — a  mansion 
suitable  to  her  dignity  and  station  as  the  bride  of  the  Lamb 
and  the  Heir  of  God.  Who  can  tell  what  this  will  be  ?  We 
grovel  so  much  here,  we  can  hardly  raise  our  poor  ideas  to  that 
inheritance  that  awaits  us.  Oh,  for  an  eagle's  wings  to  mount 
higher  toward  heaven  !  How  trifling  would  then  everything 
appear  here,  but  that  which  was  connected  with  things  above ! 
Lord,  help  Thy  creature  to  live  more  on  high — more  in  com- 
munion with  Jesus — more  looking  to  a  risen  Christ. 

"  10th. — I  have  met  with  the  following  excellent  observa- 
tions from  the  pen  of  the  Rev.  Dr.  Stone,  Rector  of  Christ's 
Church,  Brooklyn,  which  are  in  close  accordance  with  my  own 
views  :  '  The  object  of  God,  in  the  revelation  of  His  will,  and 
in  the  incarnation  of  His  Son,  is  to  save  men  from  sin,  and  to 
bring  them  to  eternal  life.  Every  one  in  whom  the  required 
faith  is  found  has  a  direct  and  personal  union  with  Christ ;  so 
that  He  draws  his  spiritual  life,  not  by  succession  from  another 
believer,  but  immediately  from  the  Saviour  Himself.  Nothing, 
however  thin,  intervenes  between  the  two.  By  faith  the  be- 
liever is  in  Christ,  and  by  the  same  faith  Christ  dwells  in  the 
believer's  heart,*  This  mystic  union  between  Christ  and  each 
individual  Christian  is  as  close  and  as  perfect  as  though  Christ 
and  each  individual  were  the  only  ones  in  all  the  world  con- 
cerned in  that  union.     As  a  foundation,  Christ  is  as  broad  as 

*  "Would  it  not  be  more  correct  to  say,  that  Christ  dwells  in  tiio 
believer's  heart  by  the  in-hein-g  of  the  Holy  Ghost .?— EpixqR. 


324  MEMOIR    OF    MIJS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

the  realm  of  sin,  and  as  long  as  the  age  of  grace  ;  so  that  every 
true  believer  touches,  immediately  and  for  himself,  that  on 
which  he  builds.  Each  single  character  holds  this  living  con- 
nexion and  communion  with  the  Saviour  as  immediately  and 
as  closely,  and  draws  life  therefrom  as  largely  and  as  perfectly, 
as  though  himself  and  the  Saviour  were  the  only  beings  con- 
cerned in  the  Divine  affinity.  There  are,  then,  in  the  world, 
and  there  have  been  from  the  beginning,  and  will  be  to  the 
end,  a  steadily  growing,  and  at  length  a  very  great  company 
of  human  beings,  maintaining  the  character  which  I  have  just 
explained — the  character  of  true  believers  in  Christ,  and  the 
relations  of  a  holy,  individual  union  with  Christ.  These,  as 
represented  in  the  Bible,  and  as  found  in  fact,  are  an  exceed- 
ingly "peculiar  people."  There  are  none  like  them  in  all  the 
world.  If  what  has  been  wrought  in  them  could  be  laid  open 
to  the  eye  of  sense,  they  would  instantly  be  known  from  other 
men  all  over  the  earth.'  Thus  writes  Dr.  Stone.  Oh,  how 
precious  is  this  union !  How  closely  it  draws  the  heart  to 
Jesus ;  and  how  the  heart  entwines  around  its  better  part,  and 
exults  in  the  thought,  that  nothing,  not  death  itself,  shall  sep- 
arate it  from  its  dearest  and  best  Friend,     This  is  my  highest 

Following  this  extract  from  an  American  divine  we  find 
transcribed  in  her  journal  an  appropriate  poetic  piece  of  touch- 
ing beauty.  The  lines  are  suggested  by  the  words  of  Jesus, 
"The  foxes  have  holes,  and  the  birds  of  the  air  have  nests, 
but  the  Son  of  man  hath  not  where  to  lay  His  head." 

"  Birds  have  their  quiet  nest, 
Foxes  tlieir  holes,  and  man  his  peaceful  bed ; 

All  creatures  have  their  rest, — 
But  Jesus  had  not  where  to  lay  His  head. 

'•  Winds  have  their  hour  of  calm, 
And  waves,  to  slumber  on  the  voiceless  deep ; 

Eve  hath  its  breath  of  balm. 
To  hush  all  senses  and  all  sounds  to  sleep. 

"The  wild  deer  hath  his  lair. 
The  homeward  flocks  the  shelter  of  their  shed; 

All  have  their  rest  from  care, — 
But  Jesus  had  not  where  to  lay  His  head. 

"  And  yet  He  came  to  give 
The  weary  and  the  heavy-laden  rest, 

To  bid  the  sinner  live, 
And  soothe  our  griefs  to  slumber  on  His  breast. 


DIARY.  325 

"  "What,  then,  am  I,  my  God, 
Permitted  thus  the  path  of  peace  to  tread  ? 

Peace,  purchased  by  the  blood 
Of  Him  who  had  not  Avhere  to  lay  His  head? 

"  T,  who  once  made  Him  grieve  ; 
I,  who  once  bid  His  gentle  spirit  mourn ; 

Whose  hand  essay'd  to  weave 
For  His  meek  brow  the  cruel  crown  of  thorn— 

"  Oh,  why  should  I  have  peace  ? 
Why  ?  but  for  that  unchanged,  undying  love, 

Which  would  not,  could  not  cease 
Until  it  made  me  heir  of  joys  above  ? 

"  Yes !  but  for  pardoning  grace 
I  feel  I  never  should  in  glory  see 

The  brightness  of  that  face 
That  once  was  pale  and  agonized  for  me  ! 

"  Let  the  birds  seek  their  nest. 
Foxes  their  holes,  and  man  his  peaceful  bed  ; 

Come,  Saviour,  in  my  breast 
Deign  to  repose  Thine  oft-rejected  head! 

"  Come  I  give  me  rest,  and  take 
The  only  rest  on  earth  tliou  lovest — within 

A  heart,  that  for  Thy  sake 
Lies  bleeding,  broken,  penitent  for  sin." 

"  Still  going  on  my  way,  leaning  on  my  Beloved,  Jesus 
is  very  precious.  No  tongue  can  tell  how  precious.  Language 
often  fails,  when  on  my  knees,  to  tell  Him  how  much  I  love 
Him.  My  soul  is  kept  near  Him.  I  often  have  Him  full  in 
view.  If  a  cloud  intervenes,  I  cannot  rest  until  it  be  with- 
drawn. Oh,  for  more  of  the  wrestling  power  of  prayer !  How 
sensibly  is  He  then  present,  lifting  up  the  light  of  His  counte 
nance,  and  bending  low  His  ear.  When  thus  He  shines,  1 
then  see  what  sin  really  is,  and  I  weep.  The  sin  pardoned, 
the  sinner  beloved — this  it  is  that  breaks  the  heart,  if  anything 
can.  What  an  honour  put  upon  a  poor  vile  sinner,  to  be  per- 
mitted to  love  Jesus — to  be  invited  to  come  to  Him  just  as  we 
are.  No  wonder  there  is  joy  in  heaven,  and  there  ought  to 
be  more  joy  on  earth.  Him  truly  we  now  only  see  through  a 
glass  darkly.  And  yet  there  are  times  when  the  vail  seems  a 
little  withdrawn.  I  believe  this  is  often  the  case  at  a  dying 
hour,  just  at  the  instant  when  the  soul  departs,  and  leaves  its 
clay  behind.  Lord  Jesus,  be  a  present  help  to  me  then.  Let 
no  misgivings  come  over  my  mind.     Keep  Satan  far  from  me. 


326  JIEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   Vv'lNSLOW. 

Remember  Thy  weak,  Thy  aged  one.  Speak  to  my  struggling 
soul.  Speak  holy  words  of  comfort.  Be  near,  and  let  me  hear 
Thy  well-known  voice.  Let  not  the  conflict  be  long.  Give 
me  a  speedy  dismissal,  and  an  abundant  entrance  into  Thy 
kingdom  above.  Oh,  to  be  for  ever  with  Thee ;  that  will  be 
heaven  enough  for  me !  To  gaze  upon  Thy  ineffable  face  for 
ever — to  love  Thee  as  I  long  to  do — oh,  it  is  worth  dying  for ! " 

"  The  Lord  has  most  preciously  drawn  sensibly  near  to  my 
soul.  This  morning,  lield  sweet  communion  with  Him.  My 
mouth  was  opened  Avide,  to  make  great  demands  on  His  love. 
I  felt  I  had  not  only  His  ear,  but  His  blessed  countenance 
shone  upon  me.  How  did  I  feel  that  to  be  with  Jesus  would 
be  heaven !  I  longed  to  be  with  Him — wanted  to  get  nearer, 
and  still  nearer.  I  wept  in  an  agony  of  love.  How  little  did  the 
world,  and  all  that  was  in  it,  appear  to  me !  Seemed  as  if  I 
could  with  ease  have  left  the  body,  and  mount  up  on  high. 
Felt  overwhelmed  with  shame  that  I  could  ever  have  har- 
boured one  unkind  thought  of  such  a  Being.  He  is  all  love, 
nothing  but  love.  Not  one  cold,  upbraiding  look  has  He  ever 
given  me.  Go  as  I  will,  and  when  I  will,  His  ever-benignant 
face  smiles  a  welcome.  Blessed  Saviour,  may  I  never,  no 
never,  mistrust  Thee,  nor  grieve  Thy  Spirit.  Keep,  oh,  keep 
me  near  Thee.  Keep  thine  own  blood-bought  child  from  de- 
parting from  Thee  now.  Let  me  not  lose  sight  of  Thee,  no, 
not  for  one  moment.  Be  Thou  in  all  my  thoughts  day  and 
night,  and  let  my  thought,  wish  and  desire  centre  in  Thyself." 

"  What  communion  can  a  formalist  have  with  God  ?  Com- 
munion is  supposed  to  be  an  interchange  of  sentiment,  feeling, 
and  expression.  AVhat  communion  could  one  have  with  a 
statue  ?  You  may  speak  to  it,  question  it ;  but  there  is  no 
response,  no  intimation  of  feeling,  no  communion.  So  is  it 
with  the  mere  religious  formalist.  He  regularly  says  his 
prayers,  but  it  is  to  an  unhioivn  God.  He  repeats  the  same 
again  and  again,  but  he  knows  not  the  Being  he  addresses. 
There  is  no  response,  no  interchange  of  feeling,  above  all,  of 
love.  Tliere  is  no  answer  from  the  Lord,  no  bending  down  of 
His  ear,  no  lifting  up  of  His  countenance,  no  cheering  wel- 
come ;  and  the  formalist  is  satisfied.  He  does  what  he  thinks 
is  his  duty.  He  repeats  his  lifeless,  heartless  prayers,  and 
tliinks  he  has  done  well ;  and  so  he  lives  and  dies  with  a  lie  in 
his  right  hand,  unless  God,  in  his  sovereign  mercy,  awakens 
him  from  his  awful  delusion,  and  shows  him  his  lost  and  undone 


DIARY.  327 

condition.  But  oh,  how  great  are  the  behever's  privileges  !  He 
draws  near  to  a  reconciled  God  and  Father.  Unless  he  has 
communion,  he  cannot  be  happy.  He  pleads  in  the  name  of 
Jesus,  opens  all  his  heart  to  One  who  loves  him,  and  whom 
he  loves.  He  finds  a  response  in  the  heart  of  God.  He  knows 
God  hears  him,  and  will  withhold  no  good  thing  from  him. 
He  makes  all  his  requests  know^n  with  thanksgiving.  He 
often  goes  heavy  laden,  and  returns  with  a  lightsome  heart, 
overflowing  with  love.  God  has  whispered  peace  to  his  troub- 
led soul,  and  the  Spirit  within  has  borne  the  witness  that 
God  loves  him.  This  is  communion.  Oh,  what  a  mercy  to 
know  it ! " 

"  Text,  Men  luondered  at.  May  the  Lord  bless  it,  and  give 
him  who  preached  it  strength  of  soul  and  strength  of  body  to 
go  onward  and  live  upward ;  to  gather  all  his  supplies  of  grace 
and  providence  from  Him  who  is  God  all-sufficient,  ready  to 
bestow  all  needful  good  for  body,  soul,  and  spirit.  Text  on 
Sabbath  morning,  Psalm  xviii.  35  :  Thy  gentleness  hath  made 
me  great.  In  the  evening,  Luke  xv.  2  :  This  man  receiveth 
sinners^  and  eateth  luith  them.'^ 

"This  is  the  Lord's  day.     Confined  to  the  house.     Dear 

is  now  standing  up  in  the  name  of  the  Lord,  proclaiming 

the  glorious  gospel  of  a  precious  Saviour.  I  have  been  to 
prayer  for  a  blessing  upon  it.  Oh,  that  the  Lord  would  pour 
out  a  mighty  blessing  on  the  church !  Oh,  that  He  would  be 
pleased  to  bow  the  heavens,  and  come  down  in  the  power  of 
the  Holy  Ghost,  and  encourage  the  heart  of  His  tried  servant ! 
Lord,  do  be  pleased  to  bless  him  throughout  the  day,  and 
made  him  the  honoured  instrument  of  great  good.  Oh,  that 
to-day  sinners  may  be  converted,  and  saints  re-converted ;  for 
how  many  such  are  but  half-awake,  alas  !  '  resting  on  theii 
lees.'" 

"  The  Lord  has  a  controversy  with  this  sinful  land,  this  un- 
godly nation.  The  famine  and  the  pestilence  is  sweeping  away 
its  hundreds  and  its  thousands  in  Ireland  and  in  Scotland. 
The  land  may  indeed  be  clothed  with  sackclotli.  But  do  the 
ungodly  take  knowledge  of  this  ?  Are  the  churches  of  Christ 
humbling  themselves?  Is  not  the  famine  in  Ireland  sent  as  a 
messenger  of  woe  to  proud  and  haughty  England  ?  Are  we 
not  partakers  of  the  sins  of  Ireland?  Are  we  less  criminal 
than  they  ?  No  ;  not  one  whit  less.  Equally  guilty  are  we 
of  trampling  upon  every  precious  precept,  and  of  substituting 


328  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY   WINSLOW. 

our  own  views  of  truth,  formed  to  please  and  honour  the  Hesh, 
instead  of  the  pure  and  precious  gospel !  Oh,  when  will  mei> 
he  wise,  and  consider  their  latter  endf  When  will  thej  obey 
God  ?  The  world,  the  world  is  in  their  hearts,  and  the  god  of 
this  world  reigns  supreme,  and  there  is  no  room  for  Jesus. 
Precious  Saviour !  still  I  pant  for  a  closer  walk  with  Thee. 
The  more  man  sets  Thee  at  nought,  the  dearer  art  Thou  to  my 
soul.  I  could  weep  to  think  how  little  Thou  art  thought  of 
by  the  world  at  large,  and  how  little  even  by  the  professing 
church.  What  a  corrupted  Christianity  spreads,  what  cold, 
heartless  formality  prevails !  How  many  are  saying,  '  Lord, 
Lord ! '  who  know  Thee  not !  How  many  are  standing  up 
this  very  day  in  the  name  of  the  Lord,  to  preach  a  gospel — 
which  yet  is  no  gospel — of  their  own  invention  ! " 

"  Spent  the  evening  at .     Had  much  to  mourn  over 

afterwards.  Lord,  help  me !  keep  me  humble,  meek,  and 
lowly  in  heart !  I  am  powerless  !  all  power  is  Thine.  With 
Thy  strengthening  arm  I  can  do  all  things.     Be  with  dear 

in  his  study  to-day.     Prepare  him  to  preach  a  full  gospel 

this  evening,  and  accompany  it  with  the  power  of  the  Holy 
Ghost  to  every  one  that  heareth.  Fill  the  place  with  true 
worshippers.  Oh,  that  sinners  may  be  converted,  and  saints 
sanctified  !     Glorify  Thyself  in  the  midst." 

"  /  cried  unto  the  Lord  ivith  my  voice  ;  with  my  voice  unto  the 
Lord,  did  I  make  my  supplication.  I  poured  out  my  complaint 
hefore  Him  ;  L  showed  before  Him  my  trouble.  How  often  has 
this  been  my  case  !  I,  too,  have  cried  unto  the  Lord  in  my 
trouble,  and  He  has  heard  me.  He  has  bent  low  His  ear,  and 
listened  to  my  cry,  and,  oh,  how  graciously  has  He  answered 
my  request,  and  done  more  and  better  for  me  than  I  asked ! 
The  Lord  always  exceeds  our  requests,  and  is  better  than  our 
fears." 

"The  Lord  laid  His  hand  upon  me  a  few  nights  ago,  and 
brought  me  very  low.  My  children  did  all  that  could  be  done 
to  alleviate  my  sufiTering;  but  I  lifted  up  my  heart  to  God 
while  fainting  and  sinking,  and  He  heard  me,  and  I  am  now 
slowly  recovering.  When  my  spirit  was  overwhelmed  within 
m,e,   then  Thou  hiewest  my  path.''' 

"  My  God,  whose  gracious  pity  I  may  claim, 
Calling  thee  '  Father,'  sweet  endearing  name, 
The  sufferings  of  this  weak  and  weary  frame 
All,  all  are  known  to  Thee. 


DIARY.  329 

"From  human  eyes  'tis  better  to  conceal 
Much  that  I  sutfer,  much  I  lionrly  feel ; 
But  oh !  this  tliought  does  tranquillize  and  heal, — 
All,  all  is  known  to  Thee. 

"  When  in  the  morning  unrefreslvd  I  wake 
Or  in  the  night  but  little  rest  I  take. 
This  brief  appeal  submissively  I  make, — • 
All,  all  is  known  to  Thee. 

*'  And  this  continued  feebleness,  this  state 
Which  seems  to  unnerve  and  incapacitate. 
Will  work  the  cure  my  hopes  and  fears  await ; 
That  cure  I  leave  to  Thee. 

"Nor  will  the  bitter  draught  distasteful  prove. 
While  I  recall  the  Son  of  Thy  dear  love  ; 
The  cup  Thou  wouldst  not,  for  our  sakes,  remove, 
That  cup  He  drank  for  me. 

*'  He  drank  it  to  the  dregs,  no  drop  remained 
Of  wrath,  whose  cup  of  woe  he  drain'd, 
Man  ne'er  can  know  what  that  sad  cup  contain'd, — 
All,  all  is  known  to  Thee. 

"  And  welcome,  precious  can  His  Spirit  make 
jMy  little  drop  of  suffering  for  His  sake. 
Father,  the  cup  I  drink,  the  path  I  take, 
All,  all  is  known  to  Thee." 

"  Dr.  Chalmers  was  found  dead  in  his  bed  a  few  days  ago. 
How  ready  Ave  all  should  be  for  the  summons  !  Blessed  Jesus, 
keep  Thine  handmaid  in  perfect  preparedness,  looking  and 
longing  for  Thy  coming.  'What,'  says  Bishop  Hall,  'is  death, 
but  the  taking  doAvn  of  these  sticks  whereof  this  earthly  tent 
is  composed.  The  separation  of  two  great  and  old  friends  till 
they  meet  again.  The  great  gaol-deliverer  of  a  long  prisoner. 
Our  journey  into  the  other  Avorld,  for  what  we,  and  this 
thoroughfare,  were  made.  Our  payment  of  our  first  debt  to 
nature.  The  sleep  of  the  body,  the  awakening  of  the  soul.' 
Lord,  come  Thou  Avith  the  last  enemy,  and  let  me  see  Thy 
smiling  face  all  through  the  dark  valley. 

"  HoAv  often,  Avhen  a  difficulty  or  trial  has  arisen,  either 
from  feelings  within  or  from  circumstances  without,  helpless  as 
an  infant,  I  have  shut  to  my  door,  and  come  to  tlie  Lord,  and 
laid  it  before  Him,  pleading  the  promise — Cast  the  hiirden  on 
the  Lord^  and  He  shall  sustain  thee.  In  a  short  time  I  have 
risen  from  my  knees,  not  only  Avith  my  pressure  entirely  gone, 


330  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

but  with  such  a  sense  of  His  faithfulness  and  abounding  love 
towards  me,  as  has  caused  me  to  rejoice  even  to  tears.  At 
other  times,  when  a  similar  necessity  has  arisen,  and  I  have 
sat  down  to  consider  what  I  ought  to  do  in  the  matter — 
thus  trusting  my  own  heart,  and  leaning  to  my  own  under- 
standing— and  afterwards  have  carried  it  to  the  Lord,  I  have 
been  left  still  to  bear  my  burden,  attended  with  much  discom- 
fort the  while,  the  Lord  having  left  me  to  my  own  way.  All 
events  are  in  His  hands  to  direct,  and  overrule,  and  bless  to 
His  own  redeemed  people.  I  say  not  that  we  are  to  fold  our 
arms  and  do  nothing ;  but  I  do  say,  that  after  carrying  our 
care  in  simple  faith  and  obedience  to  His  commands,  w^e  are  to 
wait  and  watch  the  leadings  of  His  infinitely  wise  providence, 
which  is  always  at  work  for  us." 

"  Yesterday  was  much  tried.  The  Lord  seemed  to  with- 
draw His  blessed  countenance.  I  had  not,  as  usual,  a  sense 
of  His  presence.  My  heart  failed  me,  I  missed  Him,  and  was 
troubled.  But  it  was  not  long.  I  cried  unto  Him  with  my 
voice,  and  He  heard  me.  The  cloud,  the  dark  cloud  that  veiled 
His  face,  was  removed,  and  He  again  appeared.  I  wept  for 
joy.  Oh,  how  inexpressibly  kind  and  indulgent  He  is  to  all 
to  whom  He  is  the  centre  of  all  happiness,  joy,  and  comfort  I 
How  sweet  the  fresh  recognition,  the  inward  whisper,  'I  am 
thine,  and  thou  art  mine.  Why  didst  thou  doubt?'  0  Lord, 
I  did  not  doubt  Thy  faithfulness,  but  feared  I  had  displeased 
Thee,  and  that  Thou  hadst  put  Thy  child  away  from  Thy 
presence.  Now  I  know  that  Thou  art  pacified  towards  me, 
and  my  heart  is  glad  in  Thee.  Hide  not  Thy  face  from  Thy 
aged  one,  and  put  not  Thy  servant  from  Thoe  ;  for  Thou  art 
my  chief  joy,  my  life,  my  all.  Without  Thee  this  world  were 
wretchedness  itself  I  would  not  live  always  here,  though 
blessed  witli  Thy  presence.  I  want  to  see  Thee  as  Thou  art, 
in  all  Tliy  glory,  surrounded  by  the  pure  spirits  redeemed  from 
the  curse,  and  to  join  my  song  of  praise  with  theirs.  Keep, 
oh  keep  me  near  Thyself,  nearer,  nearer  still ;  and  suffer  no 
earthly  love  to  occupy  Thy  place  in  my  heart." 

'Jesus,  first-born  Priest  and  Brother, 

Changing  not  as  others  change  ; 
Wherefore  should  we  seek  another  ? 
Whither  should  our  spirits  range  ? 

"  While  tliy  gracious  arms  enfold  us, 
Should  we  seek  another  rest  ? 


TO  MISS  R ,  OX  HER  liETUUN  FROM  AMERICA.    331 

Could  another  stay  uphold  us, 

Like  our  Saviour's  faithful  breast? 

"  Earthly  love,  how  fitful,  gleaming, 
O'er  life's  tossing,  troubled  tide; 
Thine  the  lamp  for  ever  beaming, 
With  the  golden  oil  supplied. 

"  Jesus,  come,  our  strength  renewing 
Blessed,  living  Fountain  Head ; 
Bid  our  souls  to  cease  from  hewing 
Broken  cisterns  in  Thy  stead." 

The  few  incidents  of  her  subsequent  sojourn  upon  earth,  and 
much  of  the  spiritual  exercises  of  her  mind,  will  be  gleaned 
from  extracts  from  her  correspondence. 

to  miss  r ,  on  her  return  from  america. 

"  My  dear  Miss  R , 

"  I  have  heard  a  report  that  you  have  arrived  safely 
in  England  once  more.  But  I  should  much  like  to  receive  the 
intelhgence  from  yourself,  and  to  hear  all  about  our  friends  on 
the  other  side  of  the  water, — some  dear  to  me  as  well  as  your- 
self in  that  happy  land.  I  love  America,  and  always  shall  be 
interested  in  the  welfare  of  that  country.  For  though  my 
deepest  trials  were  there,  so  there  also  I  experienced  some  of 
my  richest  consolations,  and  much  Christian  love  and  fellow- 
ship. It  is  good  to  feel  that  we  are  in  the  Lord's  hands,  and 
that  all  our  trials,  small  and  great,  are  designed  by  Him  for 
the  furthering  His  work  in  our  souls.  They  are  great  bless- 
ings in  disguise  to  a  child  of  God.  Nothing  takes  place, 
within  or  without,  but  is  designed  for  our  especial  benefit  and 
the  glory  of  His  own  dear  name.  We  shall  have  to  thank 
Him  for  all,  when  we  see  Him  face  to  face.  What  a  blessed 
time  will  that  be !  Oh,  that  we  did  but  live  more  in  holy  an- 
ticipation of  that  event,  to  which  all  things  else  are  subservient ! 
How  much  do  we  need  of  weaning  from  this  poor  disappoint- 
ing world, — a  world  lying  in  the  wicked  one ;  and  yet  so 
closely  do  we  cling  to  it,  He  who  loves  us  is  compelled  to  give 
us  many  a  wrench  to  tear  us  from  it.  Oh,  to  be  on  the  wing 
for  our  blessed  inheritance  above,  looking  to  those  things  that 
are  eternal !  Love  not  the  worlds  neither  the  things  that  are  in  the 
world.  With  what  hearts  of  unbelief  do  we  read  the  Bible ; 
and  how  prone  are  we  to  forget  its  commands,  precepts,  and 
promises;   and  so  we  call  down  a  Father's  gentle  rod,  to 


332       MEMOIR  OF  MRS.  MARY  WIXSLOW. 

awaken  us  to  a  sense  of  our  folly  and  our  sin.  But,  oh,  it  is 
all  in  love  to  our  souls  that  He  thus  acts  towards  us.  He  is 
now  trying  my  faith  in  this  dispensation.  I  have  been  some 
weeks  confined  to  the  house,  and  with  but  little  prospect  of 
being  able  to  walk  again  soon,  if  ever.  I  needed  it,  I  doubt 
not.  Now  write  me  a  long  letter ;  it  will  cheer  me  in  my  sick 
room.     My  love  to  your  nieces." 

The  bodily  infirmity  alluded  to  in  the  preceding  letter  threat 
ened  at  one  time  the  most  serious  consequences.  It  sprung 
from  a  weakness,  which  increased  to  such  a  degree,  as  not  only 
to  occasion  at  times  intense  suffering,  but  also  entirely  to  pre- 
vent the  use  of  the  limb.  For  some  months  she  was  dependent 
upon  others,  and  could  only  move  from  place  to  place  in  a 
wheel  chair.  After  having  the  best  surgical  advice  in  town, 
she  was  carried  to  Leamington,  relinquishing  all  hope  of  ever 
again  being  able  to  walk.  The  temper  of  her  mind  under  this 
severe  trial,  and  the  details  of  its  removal,  we  gather  from  one 
of  her  familiar  letters  to  a  friend. 

"  Leamington,  March  24th. 
" ....  I  have  thought  much  of  you  lately  in  your 
painful  position.  There  was  an  expression  m  my  last  to  you 
that  has  worried  me,  because  I  feared  it  might  wound  you.  I 
remarked,  among  other  things,  that  the  Christian  should  sup- 
press that  murmuring  spirit  that  adheres  so  closely  to  us. 
Now,  beloved,  I  feel  in  your  case  it  is  quite  a  different  thing ; 
and  that  in  expressing  your  daily  sufferings,  there  may  be  no 
murmuring  against  a  good  and  gracious  God  who  loves  you, 
and  is  trying  your  faith  to  the  utmost.  May  the  Lord  enable 
us  more  and  more  to  look  alone  to  Him,  for  he  is  a  present 
help  in  every  time  of  need.  His  heart  overflows  with  tender- 
ness, sympathy  and  love.  But  there  are  real  believers  who 
do,  too  often,  repine  at  the  providence  of  God.  If  all  things 
do  not  go  as  they  Avish,  they  fret  and  are  dissatisfied.  This 
state  of  mind  I  believe  is  injurious  to  them  and  dishonouring 
to  God.  Oh,  for  a  stronger  confidence  in  Jesus !  Whatever 
draws  or  drives  us  to  Him  is  good.  The  oftener  we  go  the 
better ;  and  the  Lord  frequently  places  us  in  such  peculiar  cir- 
cumstances, as  compel  us  to  apply  to  Him  for  the  help  we  can 
get  nowhere  else.  You  will  remember  my  trouble  in  the  loss 
of  the  use  of  my  limb.  I  was  obliged  to  be  carried  about  like 
an  infant.  Then  often  I  went  to  the  Lord,  and  earnestly  be- 
sought Him  to  restore  to  me  its  use.     I  fiUed  my  mouth  with 


HER   LAMENESS.  833 

arguments,  and  told  Him  He  had  but  to  speak  the  word,  and 
I  should  be  whole.  I  felt  he  could  as  easily  heal  me  as  He 
did  the  lame  man  that  lay  at  the  pool  of  Bethesda.  I  re- 
minded Him  again  and  again  of  this,  and  my  faith  was  strong 
in  His  power  to  do  now  as  He  did  then.  But  still  my  lame- 
ness continued,  and  I  was  totally  helpless.  And  now  Satan 
took  advantage  of  this  to  upbraid  me, — '  Where  is  the  answer 
to  your  prayers  ?  You  asked  not  to  be  left  to  be  a  burden  to 
yourself  or  to  others, — where  is  now  the  answer  of  which  you 
so  often  boast  ? '  But  still  I  clung  to  the  Lord,  and  believed, 
bad  as  my  case  was.  He  would  heal  me.  One  day  these  words 
came  powerfully  to  my  mind — 'Ask  for  submission.'  I  im 
mediately  obeyed  the  heavenly  admonition,  and  turned  my 
prayer  into  an  earnest  petition  for  this  grace.  At  that  very 
moment  it  was  given.  I  felt  in  an  instant  quieted  down,  and 
all  my  restlessness  of  spirit  and  anxiety  to  be  healed  was  gone, 
and  I  was  cheerful  and  composed.  I  was  satisfied  to  be  borne 
about  hke  an  infant,  if  it  were  the  Lord's  will.  A  fortnight 
after  this  my  medical  man  called,  and  seeing  me  in  the  draw- 
ing-room in  my  wheel  chair,  inquired  the  cause.  I  told  him. 
He  asked  to  examine  the  limb,  which  presented  a  highly  in 
flamed  appearance.  He  said  nothing  then,  but  called  the  fol- 
lowing day.  Finding  me  down,  he  took  my  arm,  and  insisted, 
against  my  remonstrance,  that  I  should  walk  round  the  room. 
This  I  did  three  times ;  and  from  that  hour  the  healing  process 
commenced,  and  I  was  perfectly  restored.  "Was  not  this  of 
the  Lord  ?  He  first  gave  me  submission  to  His  will,  and  then 
answered  my  prayer  by  restoring  my  limb,  and  I  was  no 
longer  a  burden.  Thus  does  He  try  the  faith  He  gives.  Oh, 
for  faith  in  the  power  of  God  !  Why  have  I  detailed  this  long 
story  ?  Simply  to  encourage  your  confidence  in  the  Lord,  who 
has  said,  Is  anything  too  hard  for  Me  f  .  .  .  1  am,  through 
mercy,  well,  and  go  on  my  way  rejoicing  in  the  Lord.  Live 
much  in  heaven,  and  earth  will  grow  less  attractive.  Realize 
what  awaits  you,  and  go  fully  into  the  good  land.  There  are 
many  borderers;  they  go  not  up  to  possess  and  enjoy  their  in- 
heritance. They  follow  not  on  to  know  the  Lord.  They  do 
not  know  what  close  fellowship  with  Christ  is.  They  do  not 
come  with  the  expectation  of  being  absolutely  heard  and  an- 
swered. They  are  satisfied  to  go  away  without  a  response. 
If  we  have  the  Spirit  of  Christ  within.  He  indites  our  prayers  ; 
for  aye  know  not  ivhat  we  should  2^'>'ay  for  as  we  ought ;  hut  the 


331  MEMOIR   OP    MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

Spirit  itself  maketh  intercession  for  us  according  to  the  will  of 
God ;  and  that  self-same  Spirit  will  respond  to  our  petitions. 
.  .  The  present  times  are  momentous.  The  Lord  himself  is 
showing  us  that  He  is  about  to  deal  with  His  one  church,  for 
He  has  but  one,  composed  of  all  that  are  born  of  the  Spirit, 
and  are  thus  new  creatures  in  Christ  Jesus.  This  is  His  bride, 
His  spouse.  This  one  church  He  is  about  to  sift.  It  needs  it, 
for  there  is  much  chaff  with  the  wheat.  Let  our  eye  and  our 
hearts  be  up  unto  Him,  and  see  what  He  designs  in  all  the 
great  movements  around  us.  I  sit  quiet  as  a  babe,  and  can 
saj,  '  It  is  my  Father,  let  Him  do  as  it  seemeth  Him  good.' 
He  will  do  us  all  possible  good,  and  no  harm.  I  hope  I  have 
not  wearied  you.  May  the  Lord  heal,  comfort,  and  bless 
you." 

Another  domestic  sorrow  was  darkling  over  her  path.  The 
alarming  illness,  and  its  fatal  termination,  of  a  much-loved 
daughter-in-law,  the  wife  of  her  son,  the  Rev.  Isaac  Deblois 
"Winslow,  Vicar  of  Napton,*  bowed  her  aged  frame  with 
sorrow  to  the  earth.  Endeared,  through  many  long  years  of 
tried  affection,  by  a  character  of  peculiar  excellence,  by  an 
amiability  of  disposition  as  rare  as  it  was  charming,  and  by 
sincere  and  simple  piety,  her  loss  was  a  sore  bereavement  to 
her  family.  Mrs.  Winslow's  diary  and  letters  describe  her 
thoughts  and  feelings  in  this  keenly-felt  affliction.  We  quote 
from  her  journal : — 

"  Feb.  1 1th. — Dear  F has  been  seriously  ill,  and  at  times 

not  expected  to  recover.     G is  with  her,  and  so  is  E . 

I  am  feeble  and  depressed.  My  threescore  years  and  ten  have 
expired,  and  I  feel  everything  a  burden  and  a  sorrow.  But 
the  Lord  is  very  gracious,  and  at  times  my  heart  is  overwhelm- 
ed with  a  sense  of  His  unmerited  love  towards  one  so  utterly 
unworthy.  I  long  to  be  with  Him.  The  thought  of  heaven 
is  very  sweet.  And  when  I  can  realize  it,  my  soul  feels  as  if 
upon  the  wing.  I  long  to  see  Him  in  glory,  who  has  so 
frequently  and  tenderly  dealt  with  me.  Even  to  old  age  has 
He  carried  me,  and  I  believe  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  me, 
but  land  me  safely  in  glory." 

"  14th. — Still  the  accounts  of  dear  F are  far  from  being 

encouraging.  I  fear  for  her  life.  I  pray  the  Lord  will  be 
graciously  pleased  to  spare   the  mother  to  her  children,  and 

*Now  Vicar  of  Bucklington,  "Warwick. 


DEATH    OF    HER    DAUGHTER-IN-LAW.  335 

sanctify  the  affliction  to  lierself  and  to  all  her  family.  How- 
needful  to  be  ready !  What  a  constant  source  of  temptation 
the  world  is,  in  some  shape  or  other,  to  the  believer  all  through 
his  journey  homeward!  Its  cares  and  its  pursuits,  its  pleasures 
and  its  claims,  lawful  though  they  be,,  yet,  through  the  w^eak- 
ness  of  the  flesh,  are  constantly  a  snare  to  the  heavenly  pilgrim. 
Its  principles  and  its  pursuits  are  adverse  to  the  prosperity  of  the 
soul,  which  struggles  on  through  a  host  of  foes  from  within  and 
from  without,  and  often  exclaiming,  'How  shall  I  ever  maintain 
my  standing  to  the  end  ?  Lord,  hold  Thou  me  up,  and  I  shall 
be  safe.  Thou,  who  hast  delivered  my  soul  from  death,  wilt 
Thou  not  deliver  my  feet  from  falling,  that  I  may  walk  before 
Thee  in  the  land  of  the  living  ? '  A  patient  waiting  upon  God, 
and  a  constant  application  to  the  Fountain,  is  the  safest  w^ay 
to  glory.  Precious  Jesus,  strengthen  thy  poor  dust,  and  enable 
me  to  cling  closer  and  closer  to  Thee.  Increase  my  faith,  and 
sanctify  me  for  Thyself     Be  with  the  dear  sufferer  to-night, 

and  give  some  refreshing  sleep,  and  keep  dear  E from 

over-fatigue.     Lord  bless,  heal,  sanctify,  and  restore! 

"  15th. — Dear  F has  fallen  asleep  in  Jesus." 

To  her  pastor  she  thus  unfolds  her  sorrow:  — 
"...  The  Lord  has  again  laid  upon  me  His  afflictive  hand. 
My  heart  has  been  sorely  tried,  and  n^y  soul  cast  down.  God 
has  taken  another  from  me,  very  dear,  and  I  cannot  describe 
how  greatly  it  has  oppressed  me.  I  am  sad,  very  sad,  and 
have  not  been  able  to  rise  above  it,  as  on  former  occasions. 
Pray  for  me.  The  Lord  is  good,  I  know ;  in  the  midst  of  it 
all,  there  is  a  reason  for  all  that  He  does,  and  He  will  make 
it  plain  in  His  own  time.  The  sufferings  of  the  dear  departed 
one  still  press  me  down;  but  at  time=:  I  get  a  glimpse  of  her 
pure  spirit  above,  and  I  weep  for  joy,  but  much  oftener  for 
sorrow.     See    how    much    I  need  year  sympathy  just  now. 

Dear  E has  been  deeply  tried.     She  w^atched  by  this  dear 

departed  one,  untiringly  and  devotedly,  day  and  night,  for 
weeks,  scarcely  in  all  that  time  having  one  night's  rest;  and  at 
last  her  sister,  as  she  wished,  expired  in  her  arms.  Beloved 
brother,  do  not  forget  us.  My  soul  is  cast  down,  but  in  the 
midst  of  all  I  can  say,  'Thy  will,  O  my  Father,  and  not  mine, 
be  done.'     Pray  for  us  and  the  motherless  ones." 

"  Dear  Miss  D . 

"...  This  has  been  a  severe  trial  to  us  all.     Dear 
Fanny  was  tenderly  beloved  by  my  whole  family,  who  have 


336  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

known  her  from  almost  a  girl.  Her  sufferings  were  severe, 
and  from  the  first  she  resigned  all  expectation  of  recovery,  and 
said,  '  I  shall  die.'  Her  mind,  in  the  early  part  of  her  illness, 
was  much  exercised  and  greatly  tried  in  view  of  eternity ;  and 
she  lamented  she  had  not  cultivated  a  closer  walk  with  God. 

Dear  E reminded  her  that  Jesus  was  ready  to  receive  her 

now,  even  now^  just  as  she  was.  She  replied,  'Yes,  I  must 
come,  as  a  poor  wretched  sinner,  now.'  The  Lord,  however, 
appeared,  and  her  mind  became  stayed  upon  Christ.  A  day 
or  two  before  she  died,  she  sang  the  whole  night  such  hymns 
as  these — 

'  Rock  of  ages,  cleft  for  rae.' 

'Jesus,  lover  of  my  soul.' 

And  on  one  occasion  said,  *  Oh,  that  I  might  recover  to  tell 
you  what  the  Lord  has  done  for  my  soul  on  this  sick  bed.' 
.  .  .  Dear  friend,  how  these  things  should  remind  us  of  the 
uncertainty  of  life,  and  the  necessity  of  living  prepared  to  meet 
the  Lord  in  the  clouds  of  heaven,  at  His  second  coming,  or 
when  he  sees  fit  to  summon  us  to  Himself!  To  be  with  Jesus, 
let  that  be  as  it  may,  is  heaven.  How  precious  is  the  thought, 
to  be  for  ever  with  the  Lord ! — to  see  Him  in  all  His  glory,  to 
mingle  with  the  pure  spirits  around  the  throne,  and  be  a 
pure  spirit  too.  Oh,  I  think  the  very  purity  of  heaven  is  its 
sweetest  attraction !  Dear  friend,  ere  long  I  hope  to  meet  you 
there.  Blessed  hope,  beaming  with  immortahty,  which  I  some- 
times long  to  realize.  Let  it  be  our  chief  aim  to  glorify  Him — 
to  live  upon  Him,  and  live  for  Him.  Oh,  he  is  most  precious, 
so  tender,  so  full  of  love,  so  watchful  over  our  interests,  caring 
for  us  in  all  things,  and  entering  into  all  our  poor  concerns! 
He  is  one  with  us  in  our  tribulations,  one  with  us  in  suffering, 
one  in  time  and  in  eternity;  for  there  is  no  separating  Christ 
and  His  saints." 

The  following  interesting  extracts  are  from  her  diary  while 
at  Napton  Vicarage,  the  scene  of  her  recent  bereavement. 
The  brief  record  of  her  visit  to  the  grave  of  the  dear  departed 
one,  evinces  the  triumph  of  real  faith  in  the  living,  as  in  the 
dying  Christian,  over  its  gloom  and  sadness.  "0  grave,  where 
is  thy  victory?"  might  well  now  have  been  her  challenge. 
Let  us,  who  repair  to  the  graves  of  the  holy  dead  who  sleep 
in  Jesus,  to  weep  there,  cherish  the  feeling  and  indulge  the 
hope  she  thus  so  touchingly  describes. 

"Napton. — I  had  often  wished,  during  my  visit  at  Napton, 


VISIT   TO   THE   GRAVE.  337 

to  see  the  spot  where  the  dear  body  laj,  but  for  fear  of  exciting 
my  feehngs  and  producing  illness,  I  refrained.  After  the  lapse 
of  some  weeks,  still  cherishing  a  strong  desire  to  go  there, 

accompanied  by  H ,  I  ascended  the  hill  to  the  church.     I 

drew  near  and  looked  at  it,  and  as  I  stood  bending  over  it, 
these  w-ords  sounded  in  my  ears,  as  distinctly  as  if  audibly 
spoken,  'She  is  not  here.''  'Oh  yes,'  I  replied  aloud,  'she  is  not 
Aere,  she  is  there,'  looking  up.-  It  was  the  well-known  voice 
of  my  Beloved.  Oh,  to  know  His  voice !  May  I  hear  it 
again  and  again,  speaking  words  of  comfort  when  I  am  called 
to  pass  through  the  dark  valley.  The  Lord  is  ever  near;  He 
is  about  our  path.  "We  have  not  far  to  go  to  seek  Him,  I 
think  I  know  something  of  the  still,  small  voice  of  the  Spirit 
within,  and  desire  so  to  walk  as  to  be  better  acquainted  with 
God,  and  to  feel  that  He  is  always  with  me,  and  that  I  am 
not  alone." 

"  Called  to  see  a  young  woman  in  the  village,  dying  of  a 
consumption.  She  does  not  know  Christ.  Read  and  prayed 
with  her.  She  begged  me  to  come  again.  Spoke  to  the 
woman  who  has  the  care  of  her;  found  her  quite  ignorant. 
This  sick  woman  has  three  young  children,  one  a  suffering 
cripple,  and  another  not  expected  to  live,  and  her  husband 
scarcely  able,  by  hard  labor,  to  maintain  them  all.  What  a 
suffering  world  is  this,  and  how  little  anxious  poor  sinners  are 
to  secure  a  better!  Went  into  another  room,  and  talked  to  an 
old  woman,  poor  but  respectable,  seventy-five  years  old.  She 
does  not  know  Jesus.  Spoke  faithfully  to  her,  at  which  she 
seemed  to  feel  and  expressed  herself  thankful.  Called  at  an 
adjoining  cottage,  and  had  a  long  conversation  with  another 
aged  woman,  who  acknowledged  she  was  not  converted.  Ex- 
horted her  to  lose  no  time  in  applying  to  One,  who  alone  could 
save  her  soul.  While  speaking  loud  to  her,  as  she  was  deaf, 
I  found  a  young  woman  in  the  next  room,  with  a  family  of 
children  about  her,  heard  me.  She  v/as  rejoiced  to  see  me, 
expressed  herself  as  happy  in  the  Lord,  and  while  speaking  of 
Christ  her  heart  seemed  to  overflow  with  love.  She  had  known 
Jesus  for  some  years.  Returned  to  the  Vicarage,  comforted  that 
I  had  seen  one  who  knew  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth." 

"How  difficult  it  is,  at  least  for  me,  to  sustain  anything  like 
spiritual  conversation  Avhen  many  are  present,  even  though  they 
are  religious  professors!  The  interest  languishes.  I  find  it 
more  profitable  to  spr^ak  to  one  or  tv.^o  alone;   and  but  seldom 


338  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

feel  refreshed  when  the  conversation  descends  to  generals. 
Oh,  to  keep  close  to  Christ,  to  talk  of  Christ,  to  encourage  one 
another  to  believe,  to  get  more  of  heaven  in  our  souls,  more 
of  the  power  of  Jesus  within,  to  believe  with  all  the  heart — 
that  is  what  we  want ! " 

'Have    been   unwell,   but    am    better,   though  still  feeble. 

H is  with  me,  and  is  very  careful  and  tender.     After  a 

little  walk  upon  the  lawn,  was  tired,  and  glad  to  rest.  What 
a  mercy  to  be  able  to  look  beyond  this  dying  world,  to  the 
prospect  of  meeting  Him  who  has  pardoned  all  my  transgres- 
sions, and  of  being  with  Him  for  ever! — to  meet  again  those 
we  have  loved  here,  mingling  with  their  pure  spirits,  and 
uniting  in  their  eternal  anthems  of  praise  to  Him  who  brought 
us  there.  And  shall  I,  the  unworthiest  of  the  unworthy,  see 
Him  face  to  face,  against  whom  I  have  so  often  sinned,  whose 
Spirit  I  liave  so  often  grieved?  Shall  I  be  near  Him,  and  be 
permitted  to  love  Him  as  my  soul  wishes  now  to  do,  but 
cannot?  Oh,  glorious  prospect!  My  heart  is  humbled  w^hile 
I  rejoice  in  the  wondrous  goodness  of  a  sin-pardoning  God, 
who  could,  and  does,  love  such  a  one  as  I.  How  I  long  to  be 
holy  even  as  He  is  holy!  And  will  it  not  be  so?  When  I 
drop  this  vile  body,  shall  I  not  awake  in  His  righteousness? 
When  I  see  Him,  shall  I  not  be  like  Him?     Everything  in 

this  house  reminds  me  of  dear  F .     She  is  with  Christ. 

Her  little  faith  would  take  her  ^vithin  the  gate  of  heaven.  She 
mourned  over  her  short-comings,  wept  that  she  had  not  walked 
closer  with  God.  But  her  end  was  peace,  and  that  was  enough. 
0 returns  from  the  Evangelical  Alliance  Conference  to- 
morrow. I  hear,  the  Lord  has  been  graciously  pleased  to  be 
with  the  dear  brethren.  Oh,  for  a  greater  outpouring  of  His 
Spirit  before  the  close  !  Lord,  set  Thy  seal  of  approval  afresh 
to  this  great  movement  of  Thy  one  church,  for  thine  own 
name's  sake." 

For  the  works  of  the  old  divines  she  had  imbibed  an  early 
taste.  Their  sound  theology,  depth  of  thought,  and  elevated 
spirituality,  harmonized  with  the  peculiar  order  of  her  own 
mind.  She  was  wont  to  remark,  that  there  was  more  of  Christ, 
more  of  the  marrow  of  the  gospel,  and  more  of  Chri&tian 
experience  in  a  single  page  of  such  authors  as  Owen  and 
Charnock,  Leighton,  Bates,  and  Newton,  than  in  entire  volumes 
of  some  modern  theological  writers.  Interwoven  with  her 
diary,  we  find  the  following  extract  from  one  of  her  favorite 


BRIDGE   ON   FAITH.  B39 

authors.     Its  perusal  may  be  a  word  in  season  to  some  tried 
reader  of  this  volume,  as  it  was  to  her  when  transcribed : — 

"On  the  subject  of  faith,  Bridge  has  these  striking  and 
excellent  remarks: — 'God  doth  so  give  blessings  and  mercies 
unto  His  own  people,  as  that  He  may  be  most  of  all  seen  in 
them.  Beloved,  God  doth  not  only  give  us  these  outward 
creature  comforts  to  supply  our  wants,  but  to  bear  up  the 
honor  of  His  own  greatness.  When  He  gives  to  His  people, 
He  gives  in  such  a  way  as  He  may  most  of  all  unfold  Himself. 
If  it  were  only  to  supply  their  w^auts,  then,  possibly,  the  sen- 
tence of  death  would  never  come  upon  the  second  cause ;  but 
it  is  also  to  bear  up  His  own  name,  and  the  honor  of  His  own 
greatness,  and  that  is  done  this  way.  Hereby  God  is  known 
to  be  the  living  God.  So  long  as  there  is  life  in  the  means, 
God  is  not  so  well  known  to  be  the  living  God;  but  when  all 
means  are  dead,  and  yet  the  mercy  comes,  'Oh,'  says  the  soul, 
'now  I  see  that  God  is  the  living  God.'  Hereby  the  power 
of  God  is  made  known.  He  must  needs  be  great  in  power, 
that  can  say  to  things  that  are  not,  'Be,'  and  give  a  resurrec- 
tion to  dead  things.  So  long  as  there  is  strength  and  ability 
in  the  means,  the  soul  doth  not  so  much  consider  the  power  and 
the  all-sufficiency  of  God ;  but  when  all  means  are  strengthless, 
and  all  means  are  dead,  and  yet  the  mercy  comes,  'Oh,'  says 
the  soul,  'now  I  see  that  God  is  Almighty,  God  all-sufficient.' 
Secondly,  God  goes  to  work  this  way  with  His  people,  that 
they  may  learn  to  trust  more  in  Him,  and  in  Him  alone.  The 
apostle  says,  'She  that  is  a  widow  and  desolate  trusteth  in 
God.'  We  seldom  trust  in  God  till  a  desolation  comes  upon 
the  means ;  then  we  learn  to  trust  in  God.  So  long  as  one 
who  is  learning  to  swim,  can  touch  earth  with  his  feet,  he  does 
not  commit  himself  to  the  stream.  So  long  as  the  soul  can 
stand  upon  second  causes,  he  does  not  commit  himself  to  the 
stream  of  mercy.  Again,  God  is  pleased  thus  to  order  things 
that  the  comforts  of  His  people  may  be  more  sure  and  stead- 
fast. If  our  comforts  hang  at  the  girdle  of  the  creature,  they 
are  most  uncertain;  but  if  they  are  all  laid  upon  God,  His 
promise  and  His  power,  they  are  certain.  Again:  A  mere 
rational  considering  of  the  means — their  straitness,  narrowness, 
and  scantiness — is  a  great  enemy  to  the  act  of  believing.  The 
Scriptures  have  laid  a  flat  opposition  between  faith  and  sense. 
We  hve  by  faith,  and  not  by  sense.  The  reasons  drawn  from 
sense  are  sense.     If  you  live  by  faith,  you  do  not  live  by  sense. 


340  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

They  are  two  buckets — the  hfe  of  sense  and  the  hfe  of  faith, 
when  one  goes  up,  the  other  goes  down.  The  higher  faith 
rises,  the  lower  sense  and  reason  sink.  If  you  would  believe, 
you  must  crucify  that  question,  '  Why  ?  '  God  would  not  have 
us  so  fall  of  wherefores.  And  if  you  would  believe,  you  must 
go  blindfold  into  God's  command.  Abraham  subscribed  to  a 
blank  when  the  Lord  called  him  out  of  his  own  country.  It 
is  the  privilege  of  all  the  children  of  Abraham  to  believe  when 
means  fail.  It  is  exceeding  pleasing  to  God,  and  most  accept- 
able. Oh,  what  encouragement  is  here  to  believe  above  hope 
and  against  hope,  and  when  death  sits  upon  the  life  of  the  second 
cause !  Some  there  are  that  can  believe  for  the  bodies,  but  they 
cannot  trust  God  for  their  souls  wdien  means  fail.  Some  say 
they  can  trust  God  for  their  souls  when  means  fail,  but  they 
cannot  trust  Him  for  their  bodies.  Some  say  they  can  trust 
God  for  themselves,  but  they  cannot  trust  Him  for  their 
famihes.     0  my  soul,  trust  thou  upon  God  I"* 

TO  MRS.  C .       TRIALS,  A  HEAVENLY  DISCIPLINE. 

"  Yery  dear  Friend,  "Naptoa,  August  22d. 

"The  Lord  has  brought  me  here,  I  trust,  for  some  ser- 
vice He  has  for  me  to  do.  If  His  servants,  we  ought  to  be 
doing  His  work ;  and  it  is  so  sweet  to  work  when  love  turns 
the  wheel.  It  is  the  love  of  God  in  the  heart  that  sets  us  all 
in  motion.  I  am  persuaded  it  is  irksome  where  this  is  not  the 
case.     To  work  for  God  as  a  hireling  is  one  thing,  and  to  work 

for  Him  as  a  son  is  another.     Dear  E is  one  of  the  most 

efficient  curates  a  parish  minister  need  have.  She  is  up  and 
doing  the  will  of  the  Lord  in  everything  to  which  he  points. 

I is  from  home,  and  she  is  doing  his  work,  all  but  going 

into  the  pulpit ;  and  this  she  gets  properly  supplied,  and  has 
this  morning  gone  ten  miles  to  procure  a  clergyman  who  she 
knows  loves  and  preaches  the  gospel.  ...  I  was  glad  to  hear 

dear  Mr.  C was  better  in  health.     We  must  not  expect 

much  here ;  all  our  richest  blessings  are  to  come,  reserved  for 
us  who  are  kept  for  them.  This  time-state  is  but  a  prepara- 
tory state.  We  are  disciplining  and  preparing  for  the  glorious 
inheritance  above ;  but  how  often,  through  wretched  unbelief, 
w^e  seem  to  w^ish  to  have  our  all  here.  And  although,  from 
bitter  experience,  we  feel  and  acknowledge  it  is  polluted,  and 

*  Rev.  William  Bridge  died  1670. 


EVANGELICAL    ALLIANCE.  341 

IS  not  our  rest,  yet  more  or  less  we  go  on,  often  repining,  be- 
cause we  cannot  have  things  just  as  we  wish.  Oh,  to  leave 
ourselves  in  a  loving,  tender  Father's  hands  !  He  knows  what 
we  need,  and  what  we  ought  to  have,  and  will  deny  us  no  good 
thing.  But  He  must  judge  for  us,  who  are  but  as  babes,  who 
cannot  judge  for  ourselves.  .  .  .  You  are  in  His  hands,  and 
although  He  tries  your  faith,  in  due  time,  if  you  look  alone  to 
Him,  He  will  appear  for  you,  and  show  you  the  why  and  the 
wherefore  He  has  tried  you.  Blessed  is  the  man  that  trusteth 
in  the  Lord :  may  this  blessing  rest  upon  you.  It  is  so  diffi- 
cult to  keep  from  looking  to  an  arm  of  flesh,  and  yet  say,  we 
must  make  use  of  the  means.  I  do  not  plead  for  indolence, 
nor  would  encourage  inactivity ;  but  I  would  not  work  out  a 
way  for  myself,  but  leave  it  to  Him,  who  sees  the  end  from  the 
beginning,  to  work  for  me.  It  is  a  happy  position  for  a  behever 
to  be  in,  when  he  is  brought  to  that  point  to  see  he  can  do  no- 
thing for  himself,  then  to  rest  and  wait  patiently  for  the  Lord, 
fully  believing  He  will  do  all  things  in  the  best  possible  way. 
Whatever  the  Lord  does  in  this  way  for  us,  is  the  best,  the 
very  best,  better  than  with  all  our  wisdom  and  management 
we  could  have  done  for  ourselves.  I  am  persuaded,  the  more 
we  live  by  faith,  the  holier  and  the  happier  Ave  are.  Is  it  not 
written.  Casting  all  your  care  upon  Him,  for  He  careth  for  you? 
"What,  then,  need  I  care,  when  my  Saviour  is  caring  for  me  ? 
Am  I  not  one  with  Christ,  and  is  He  not  one  with  me  ?  Then, 
are  not  my  concerns  His  concerns,  and  has  He  ever  failed  me? 
Then,  0  my  soul,  why  not  trust  Him  now  ?  May  He  increase 
our  faith  ;  this  will  more  glorify  Him  than  all  our  fleshly  burnt- 
oflerings  and  sacrifices. 

"How  do  you  both  feel  towards  the  'Evangelical  Alliance,' 
now  assembled  in  London  ?  I  consider  it  one  of  the  grandest 
movements  of  the  one  church  below  since  the  apostles'  time. 
One  of  Christ's  last  commands  was.  Love  ye  one  another,  as  1 
have  loved  you.  Now  we  are  always  anxious  to  fulfil  the  dying 
requests  of  one  we  love,  and  everything  then  said  seems  of  the 
greatest  moment  to  us.  This  was  one  of  our  dying  Lord's  last 
requests  to  His  church.  These  dear  men  are  carrying  it  out 
on  the  broad  foundation,  simply  of  love  to  all  who  love  Him, 
and  who  hold  Him  the  Head  ;  while  all  minor  things  are  laid 
aside,  and  they  agree  on  the  fundamental  truths  of  the  gospel. 
I  believe  this  movement  is  of  God  Himself,  and  that  already 
He  has  put  upon  it  His  seal  of  approbation.     Satan  will  en- 


342  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    ilARY    WTNSLOW. 

deavor  to  hinder  it ;  but  be  assured  tlie  Lord  will  bless  it,  for 
it  is  a  holy  attempt  to  obey  His  command,  which  has  been  too 
much  neglected.  Many  will  sa}-,  w^ho  stand  aloof  from  the 
Alliance,  'But  I  do  love  all  God's  people.'  We  answer, 
'  Show  your  love  by  uniting  with  these  men  of  God  as  one  in 
Christ.'  God  is  love.  The  atmosphere  of  heaven  is  love. 
When  w^e  arrive  there,  we  shall  swim  in  an  ocean  of  love ; 
then  why  not  have  as  much  of  heaven  here  as  we  can  ?  Why 
not  try  to  be  as  much  like  what  we  shall  be,  while  journeying 
towards  that  ocean  of  bliss  and  love  ?  I  think,  were  I  upon 
my  dying  bed,  and  were  called  upon  to  address  them,  I  should 
say,  '  Go  on,  my  beloved  brethren,  to  show  your  love  to  Jesus, 
by  exhibiting  your  love  to  every  member  of  His  own  body  ; 
for  you  are  all  members  of  that  Body,  and  members  one  of  an- 
other. Love  ye  one  another^  as  I  have  loved  you.''  I  believe 
that  popery  is  working  its  silent  way,  and  that  the  last  effort 
of  the  '  beast '  will  soon  be  manifest.  No  wonder  that  the  Lord 
is  calling  his  people  to  unite  together  in  a  holy  confederacy  to 
resist  the  common  foe.  It  will  require  the  united  force  of  God's 
church  to  withstand  this  arch  enemy.  I  believe  that  this  '  Al- 
liance '  is  preparatory  to  the  great  onset ;  that  the  work  is  the 
Lord's,  and  that  He  will  bless  it.  I  can  and  do  pray  for  it, 
nor  can  I  express  to  you  in  language  the  measure  the  Saviour 
permits  me  to  enjoy  of  His  sensible  presence  while  pleading  on 
its  behalf  Oh,  there  is  a  truth  in  the  religion  of  Jesus  !  There 
is  an  enjoyment  in  communion  with  the  holy  God,  of  which  the 
worldling  knows  nothing.  It  is  foolishness  with  the  wisest  of 
men ;  but  the  sincere,  lowly  follower  of  Christ  Jesus,  loved  of 
God,  regenerated  by  the  Holy  Ghost,  is  made  to  sit  in  heavenly 
places  in  Christ  Jesus.     Oh,  the  infinite  value  of  a  throne  of 


grace 


"  Dear  beloved  Friend,  '•  Leamington,  27th,  1851. 

"It  is  long  since  I  heard  it'om  you.  We  are  both  near- 
ing  our  port,  where  we  are  to  cast  anchor  for  ever.  Sweet 
thought!  What  a  mercy  for  you  and  me  tliat  we  have  known 
Jesus ;  a  still  greater  mercy  that  He  has  condescended  to  know 
and  acknowledge  us  as  His!  Let  us  rejoice  together  in  the 
goodness  and  loving-kindness  of  our  God.  My  heart  is  often 
overwhelmed  at  the  thought  of  His  avowing  such  a  worthless 
worm  as  myself  as  one  of  His  sheep  for  whom  He  shed  His 
precious  blood.     Dear  friend,  let  us  never  for  a  moment  forgot 


LETTERS   TO    HER   DAUGHTER.  343 

what  we  were,  and  what  we  now  are — candidates  for  a  crown 
of  glory,  heirs  of  God,  and  joint-heirs  with  Christ.  Is  not  this 
worth  Uving  for,  and  worth  dying  for?  Let  us  now  aim  to 
walk  humbh'  and  confidingly  with  Him,  and  never  suffer  Him 
to  be  out  of  our  sight.  Oh,  to  travel  on,  leaning  upon  our 
Beloved!  His  arm  will  support  us  in  our  feebleness;  His  eye 
will  guide  us  in  our  blindness ;  He  will  strengthen,  uphold,  and 
comfort  us,  and  never  leave  nor  forsake  us.  I  cannot  express 
to  yon  on  paper,  hardly  in  language,  how  graciously  the  Lord 
does  at  times  enable  me  to  anticipate  the  heaven  of  glory  that 
awaits  the  believer  in  Jesus.  There  sits  Jesus,  He  who  was 
once  despised  and  rejected  of  men ;  who  suffered,  the  innocent 
for  the  guilty ;  w^ho  paid  the  full  demand  to  stern  justice  for 
our  sins ;  He  who  had  no  place  to  lay  His  weary  head,  though 
Maker  of  all  things;  there  He  now  is,  enthroned  in  the  majesty 
of  heaven,  and  encircled  by  that  goodly  company  who  have 
escaped  from  earth,  and  are  now  hymning  His  praises,  and 
standing  nearer  His  thro7ie  than  the  highest  angel  in  heaven. 
I  sometimes  so  realize  the  blessedness  of  the  believer,  that  I 
could  shout  to  the  whole  world  that  all  is  true,  the  Bible  true, 
Christ  true,  heaven  true.  May  the  Lord  bless  you  w^th  much 
of  His  sensible  presence ;  and  when  we  get  above,  we  will 
unite  our  praises  to  Him  who  loved  us,  and  washed  us  in  His 
own  most  precious  blood," 

AYe  continue  extracts  from  her  family  correspondence,  as 
exhibiting  a  yet  greater  variety  of  topic  : — 

TO    HER    DAUGHTER, 

"  .  .  .  .  Oh,  to  look  fully  to  Jesus,  not  with  a  half-heart, 
but  to  carry  all  our  every  varying  care  to  Him,  and  plead  the 
promise.  Sure  I  am,  if  we  walk  in  the  precept,  He  will  fulfil 
to  us  the  promise.  May  He  continually  give  us  grace  to  do 
so !  Oh,  the  luxury  of  living  upon  Him ;  to  be  constantly 
depending  upon  our  covenant  Father  in  Christ  Jesus !  But 
faith  has,  and  must  have,  hard  travail  to  bring  forth,  and  to 
press  through  the  crowd  of  difficulties  and  impossibilities  that 
lie  in  the  way  to  the  kingdom  of  glory.  Thus  faith  fights  all 
the  journey  through,  and  upholds  the  poor,  trembling  believer; 
and  not  only  so,  but  brings  him  off  victorious  at  last.  The  life 
of  fxith  in  the  soul  of  man  is  wonderful,  and  is,  I  believe,  a 
wonder  to  the  angels  in  heaven ;  and  I  am  sure  we  are  often 
a  wonder  to  ourselves, — at  least  I  am.     Oh,  what  a  God  we 


344  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    M  vRY    WINSLOW. 

have  to  do  with  !  so  full  of  love  and  compassion ;  and  although 
He  tries  us,  it  is  all  in  love  to  bring  us  to  know  Him  more, 
that  we  might  love  Him  better.  Should  w^e  not  give  our  un- 
divided hearts  to  this  gracious  God  and  Father  in  Christ 
Jesus?  The  last  chapter  of  the  Gospel  of  John  is  so  full, 
precious,  and  abounding  in  the  love  of  the  Triune-Jehovah, 
from  the  14th  to  the  18th  verse.  Read  it  with  prayer,  and 
see  how  certain  and  secure  is  our  salvation,  what  a  firm  foun- 
dation it  rests  upon.  What  is  the  world,  or  the  glory  of  a 
thousand  such  perishing  worlds  as  this,  when  compared  with  the 
glory  that  shall  be  revealed  in  them  that  love  His  appearing?" 
"  What  a  mercy  to  have  a  good  and  gracious  God  to  look 
to,  and  ask  what  you  will,  and  to  know  that  He  always  hears 
and  stands  ready  to  answer  !  Think  what  an  honour  put  upon 
a  poor  worm,  to  have  the  ear  and  the  heart  of  the  mighty 
God  I  to  know  that  He  loves  you,  and  cannot  cease  to  love, 
because  He  cannot  change.  He  knows  what  we  -were,  and 
what  we  should  be  to  the  end ;  and  yet  He  loved  us,  and  will 
love  throughout  eternity.  And  what  does  He  require  ?  Only 
our  heart — -just  as  it  is,  with  all  its  imperfections.  He  asks  the 
gift,  and  that  it  may  be  His,  and  His  only.  He  loves  not  a  di 
vided  heart — He  will  not  share  it  with  the  creature.  .  .  .  He  can 
never  do  aught  but  good  to  you,  because  you  are  His — His  child. 
His  ow;7i  child  by  adoption — His  child  by  regeneration — His  child 
by  an  especial  promise.  I  will  he  a  Father  to  thy  fatherless  chil 
dren^  says  God  to  you.  So  you  see  what  a  claim  you  have  upon 
God.  Remind  Him  of  this.  He  loves  to  be  reminded  of  His 
promises,  though  He  never  forgets  them ;  but  He  loves  to  see 
that  we  remember  them  too.  Oh,  what  a  holy  endearing  in- 
tercourse there  is  between  a  child  of  God  and  his  heavenly 
Father  !  No  earthly  parent  could  have  loved  you  as  He  does. 
There  is  something  so  precious  in  coming  to  Him,  your  Father 
in  Jesus.  These  tw^o  names  are  better  and  sweeter  than  all 
the  names  on  earth  and  in  heaven ;  a  name  which  is  above 
every  name  ;  and  these  are  yours  made  over  to  you  by  an  ever- 
lasting covenant  of  grace,  which  will  finally  end  in  glory  to  all 
eternity.  Be  not  over  careful  about  earthly  things  ;  get  above 
them  as  much  as  you  can.  Look  to  Jesus  for  help  when  they 
press  upon  you,  and  He  will  not  fail  you,  for  He  knows  that 
without  Him  you  can  do  nothing.  All  power  is  His  in  heaven 
and  on  earth.  Go  to  Him  for  little  things,  in  little  straits  and 
difficulties,  at  home  or  abroad,  in  a  crowd  or  w]\on  alone ;  raiso 


JOY   IN    THE   RESURRECTION.  345 

your  heart  to  your  Father  who  heareth  alway,  and  will  never 
leave  nor  forsake  His  own  child ;  for  He  will  be  with  you  even 
unto  the  end.  Look  at  the  scenes  of  a  busy  world,  how  they 
pass  away ;  it  is  but  as  the  buzzing  of  a  summer  fly,  and  all  is 
gone.  Therefore,  set  your  affections  on  things  above,  where 
friends  pass  not  away.  Oh,  for  stronger  faith,  to  give  full 
credit  to  what  the  Lord  says,  to  act  upon  it,  and  carry  it  out 
in  every  department  of  life  !  " 

"...  How  have  I  thought  of  you  all  this  day,  travelling 
to  a  strange  place,  and  the  weather  so  cold  !  You  have  not 
been  a  moment,  I  think,  out  of  my  mind.  I  thought,  and 
prayed,  and  could  have  wept.  I  trust  the  Lord  heard  my 
prayer  and  strengthened  you,  and  shielded  you  from  the  sever- 
ity of  the  weather,  and  caused  you  to  see  His  own  loving  hand. 
If  you  do  not  find  Clifton  to  suit  you,  try  Torquay,  or  Ventnor. 
Oh,  that  the  Lord  may  lend  a  gracious  ear,  and  cause  us  to  see 
all  was  directed  in  a  special  way  by  Himself!  .  .  .  But  I 
must  again  advert  to  the  great  mercy  of  having  such  a  Helper 
as  our  loving  Lord  to  do  all  for  us,  and  far  better  than  we 
could  think  of  or  imagine  for  ourselves.  I  trust,  when  He 
places  us  in  such  peculiar  situations,  it  is  to  make  us  see 
and  feel  there  is  a  reahty  and  power  in  faith  in  God.     Write 

as  soon  as  you  can,  if  it  is  only  a  few  hues.     0 is  in  his 

study ;  H and  P are  reading  Miss  Grant's  Memoir, 

written  by  her  mother.  Good  night.  May  you  enjoy  much 
of  the  presence  of  the  Lord,  and  feel  you  are  not  alone,  but 
that  you  have  the  best  Friend  that  mortal  can  have  to  watch 
over  you,  and  to  whom  you  can  open  your  whole  heart,  and 
talk  to  Him  as  a  man  talketh  Avith  his  fellow." 

To  her  son,  in  acknowledging  a  small  work  on  the  Resur- 
rection, she  thus  touches  upon  her  favorite  theme : — 

"  Blessed  is  the  pen,  blessed  the  hand  that  holds  and  the 
heart  that  indites,  that  gives  one  cheering  view  of  the  mighty 
blessing  that  awaits  the  sleeping,  holy  dead  !  The  dust  of  the 
Christian  reposes  in  quietude  until  the  voice  of  Jesus  shall  bid 
the  slumberer  arise  in  perfect  beauty,  in  His  own  likeness,  and 
suited  to  the  happy  spirit,  and  both  now  joyfully  mingling  with 
the  blessed  of  the  Lord  in  the  kingdom  prepared  from  the 
foundation  of  the  world.  Happy  Christian  !  Your  journey 
here  was  thorny,  and  the  last  enemy  may  even  now  be  look- 
ing upon  you ;  but,  take  courage ;  the  time  will  come  when 
this  very  body  shall  rise  again  to  life  immortal,  and  soul  and 
15* 


346  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

body  be  ever  with  the  Lord,  increasing  in  beauty,  growing  in 
knowledge  and  glory  through  eternity.  Happy  saint !  Oh, 
to  meet,  too,  with  those  we  love,  the  dear  departed  ones  for 
whom  we  have  mourned !  We  shall  meet  again.  Jesus  on 
the  throne  will  rejoice  with  us  when  He  beholds  our  happiness 
complete,  Himself  its  sole  author  and  finisher.  Oh,  the  glory 
of  that  moment !  Preach  much  on  the  resurrection  of  the  be- 
liever. It  will  encourage,  perhaps,  many  a  timid,  sorrowful 
spirit.  I  find  it  so  when  able  to  glance  at  it  myself.  How 
wearisome  is  now  the  poor  body,  creeping  to  the  grave,  and 
Satan  ever  ready  to  suggest  his  *  ifs '  and  '  buts  ! '  It  is  a  dying 
body,  but  it  shall  rise  again.  Jesus  has  said  it.  Lord,  increase 
my  faith." 

"  I  was  so  thankful  to-day,  so  refreshed  and  comforted,  in 
reading  your  welcome  letter,  that  it  led  me  with  a  heart  full 
of  love  to  a  throne  of  grace.  I  closed  my  door,  and  kneeling 
before  my  chair,  gave  vent  to  my  grateful  and  deep  emotions 
to  Him  who  heareth  His  own  redeemed,  bought  with  His 
precious  blood,  always.  Oh,  the  matchless  love  that  is  in  our 
reconciled  Father's  heart !  Can  we  suppose  for  a  moment  that 
He  sees  not  our  trials,  temptations,  and  conflicts ;  and  that  He 
is  not  caring  for,  and  watching  over  us  ?  Oh,  no ;  God  is  with 
us  and  for  us,  working  all  things,  even  now,  for  our  good  and 
His  glory." 

"  Saturday  morning. — I  have  just  been  praying  for  you,  and 
I  do  feel  I  have  the  ear  of  the  most  blessed,  the  most  precious, 
most  loving  God  and  Saviour  that  ever  poor  sinner  had  to 
deal  with.  I  am  often  overwhelmed  with  such  a  sense  of  His 
wonderful  condescension,  that  language  fails  me,  and  I  can  do 
little  else  than  weep.  Oh,  how  strange  that  He  should  listen, 
and  so  listen,  as  if  He  said,  Yes^  yes,  to  every  request  I  make ! 
He  overcomes  me  with  His  love.  He  breaks  my  heart,  then 
heals  it  again.  It  is  His  love  that  does  it.  He  gives  godly 
sorrow ;  puts  forth  His  hand  and  draws  me  near  to  Himself, 
and  then  says,  What  is  thy  j)etition,  and  ivhat  is  thy  request  f 
Then  I  hasten  to  tell  Him  all,  all,  as  if  I  feared  He  would 
withdraw  before  I  could  do  so.  But  He  lingers  and  listens, 
and  then  sends  me  away  rejoicing  that  I  have  such  a  Friend 
in  heaven,  and  longing  to  drop  this  body  of  sin  and  death,  that 
I  might  be  with  Him.  Oh,  God  is  such  an  ocean  of  love  to 
me!  The  more  His  wondrous  love  is  manifested,  the  more  I 
hate  and  abhor  myself     Tins  is  your  God,  too.     And  though 


DIARY.  347 


He  tries  the  faith  of  His  people,  He  will  appear.  Remember, 
Joseph  was  two  long  years  in  prison,  after  he  had  got  the 
promise  from  the  chief  butler ;  and  no  doubt  his  faith  was 
sharply  tried,  for  God  had  partly  given  him  the  promise,  by 
enabling  him  to  interpret  the  dream.  But,  at  last,  the  promise 
was  fulfilled,  and  the  blessing  came  in  rich  abundance.  Take 
courage.  He  is  the  same  now  that  He  ever  was." 

"  This  morning  while  the  children  were  surrounding  my 
breakfast  table,  I  spoke  to  them  of  some  of  the  providential 
dealings  of  God  with  me,  passing  through  this  wilderness- 
world,  by  land  and  by  sea.  Among  others,  was  brought  to 
my  recollection  the  circumstance  of  my  embarking  on  board 
ship  on  a  long  voyage  to  Bermuda,  in  ill-health,  going  to  join 
the  regiment  to  which  we  belonged.  Our  provisions  were 
nearly  exhausted ;  and  there  was  little  else  on  board  but  salt 
meat,  fit  only  for  the  hardy  sailors,  and  most  unsuitable  for  me, 
an  invalid  just  recovering  from  a  severe  illness.  But  the  Lord 
sent  a  calm,  and  with  the  calm  a  shoal  of  dolphins  alongside, 
which  followed  us  from  that  time  a  great  part  of  the  passage, 
affording  us  a  wholesome  meal  every  day,  of  great  delicacy. 
Oh,  how  wonderful  is  our  God  in  all  His  dealings  with  the 
children  of  men !  My  soul  is  refreshed,  and  I  have  been  on 
my  knees  to  thank  Him  for  bringing  these  incidents  to  my  re- 
membrance. It  is  good  to  call  to  mind  the  many  deliverances 
we  have  met  with  from  the  hand  of  cur  God.  Shall  we  not 
often  think  of  them,  and  tell  them  to  our  children,  and  recount 
them  by  the  way  ?  Lord,  pardon  my  heartless  sin  of  unbelief, 
and  let  my  w4iole  heart  sweetly,  safely  confide  in  Thee.  I  am 
afraid  your  health  is  not  as  good  as  it  was.  Try  and  cast  this 
burden  on  the  Lord,  and  He  will  help  you.  I  know^  He  is 
willing  as  He  is  able.  Only  believe,  and  let  the  precept  be  as 
precious  as  the  promise,  and  the  Lord  w^ill  appear  for  you  in 
His  own  good  time.  Wait  on  the  Lord.  The  Lord  exercises 
faith,  and  this  is  needful  to  conform  us  to  His  own  lovely  like- 
ness. We  want  to  be  like  Christ,  but  we  do  not  like  the  way 
He  takes  to  make  us  so.  What  a  mercy  it  is  that  He  takes 
His  own  way,  and  not  ours  !  Fear  not^  is  the  dear  Redeemer's 
watchword  to  His  saints.  Why  should  we  fear?  Are  not 
our  worthless  names  written  in  the  Lamb's  book  of  life  ?  If 
He  is  ours,  and  we  are  His,  will  He  withhold  anything  that  is 
really  good  for  us  ?  No,  not  even  the  rod ;  for  that  is  often 
for  our  good.     I  wonder  how  it  is  that  Christians  do  not  fear 


348  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY   WINSLOW. 

the  rod  more  than  they  do.  They  think  that  God  is  altogether 
such  as  themselves,  and  will  not  chasten  His  beloved  child 
when  He  sees  he  needs  it.  But  He  will  chasten,  because  he  is 
His  child ;  and  that,  too,  should  make  us  hate  sin,  and  watch 
against  its  risings  in  our  hearts ;  though  love  is  a  more  influ- 
ential grace  than/e«r." 

"I  had  one  of  my  alarming  fainting  fits,  and  often  think  I 
may  go  off  in  one  of  them.  And  if  indeed  ready,  which  I 
trust  I  am,  what  a  mercy  would  this  be  !  Absent  from  the 
body,  I  should  be  present  with  the  Lord.*  I  am  better,  but 
feeble.  God  be  praised  for  all  His  love-tokens.  These  visita- 
tions are  nothing  more.  They  are  designed  to  prepare  us  for 
our  glorious  inheritance  above.  The  oftener  the  gold  is  put 
in  the  furnace,  the  more  the  dross  is  consumed,  and  the  brighter 
it  shines.  In  the  trial,  we  cling  closer  to  Jesus  ;  we  see  more 
of  His  loving  heart,  and  imbibe  more  of  His  holy  image.  We 
cannot  come  in  close  contact  with  Christ,  and  not  get  good. 
Touch  but  the  hem  of  His  garment,  and  virtue  flows.  Last 
night  I  rode  to  the  Episcopal  Chapel,  West-street,  to  hear  one 
of  a  course  of  twelve  sermons  on  the  New  Covenant.  Some 
of  these  sermons  have  been  excellent,  but  this  last  evening 
was  rather  prosy.  I  could  not  see  with  the  good  man,  and 
think  he  overstrained  the  Scriptures.  However,  the  subject  is 
well  worth  close  investigation.  There  is  a  volume  just  out, 
composed  of  twelve  sermons,  one  of  which  is  by  Mr.  James 
Haldane  Stewart,  on  the  present  signs  of  the  times,  which  are 
considered  very  ominous.  They  are  looking  for  judgment  on 
the  Gentile  church,  and  the  restoration  of  God's  ancient  peo- 
ple ;  and  certainly  there  is  a  moving  of  the  waters  in  that 
quarter  just  now.  Oh,  that  God  might  give  us  a  right  judg- 
ment in  all  things  !  May  he  keep  you  steady  to  your  princi- 
ples, and  enable  you  to  hold  fast  that  which  you  have  received 
and  been  taught  by  the  Holy  Ghost !  Trying  times  are 
coming  upon  the  church  of  Christ ;  men's  souls  will  be  tried 
as  gold  is  tried  in  the  furnace." 

"  The  way  the  Lord  is  teaching  you  is  the  right  way.  To 
be  well  acquainted  with  our  own  hearts,  is  to  bring  us  nearer 

*  "  I'etter  a  thousand  times  live  under  the  government  and  tutory  of 
Christ,  than  to  your  own,  and  hve  at  will  Live  in  Christ,  and  you 
are  in  the  suburbs  of  heaven ;  there  is  but  a  thin  wall  between  you 
and  the  land  of  praises, — ye  are  within  an  hour's  sailing  of  the  shore 
of  the  new  Canaan. — Rutherford. 


DIARY.  349 

to  Jesus,  and  to  make  us  more  firmly  cling  to  the  Cross.  Your 
poor  heart  is  the  same  as  it  was  years  ago,  but  there  was  no 
light  to  show  its  evil.  But  as  you  grow  in  grace,  you  will  see 
more  and  more  the  goodness  of  God  in  the  gift  of  His  dear 
Son,  to  make  an  all-sufficient  atonement  for  sinners  so  vile  and 
utterly  helpless  as  we  are.  It  is  a  great  mercy  that,  while 
the  Holy  Ghost  opens  up  the  deep  fountain  of  iniquity  within 
to  our  view.  He  also,  at  the  same  time,  shows  us  the  Fountain 
open,  always  open,  in  which  we  may  wash  and  be  clean.  This 
makes  Jesus  so  precious  to  the  deeply -taught  Christian.  To  be 
well  acquainted  with  your  own  heart  is  worth  all  the  pain  you 
may  be  called  to  suffer.  I  am  often  tempted  to  say  to  you, 
make  the  most  of  your  time  now  to  acquaint  yourself  w^ith 
God.  A  time  of  affliction  is  like  material  thrown  into  the 
ground  to  enrich  it,  that  it  produce  a  good  harvest  in  good 
time.  This  is  rather  a  homely  way  of  expressing  what  I 
mean ;  nevertheless,  I  refer  you  to  the  whole  tenor  of  Scrip- 
ture for  the  truth  of  this.  Sweet  affliction,  that  brings  us  near 
to  God." 

"  Oh,  to  have  the  heart  right  with  God  !  It  is  so  awfully 
deceitful,  and  wo  are  so  continually  more  or  less  deceived  by 
it,  that  we  fancy  all  is  right,  when,  in  fact,  all  may  be  wrong. 
Then  comes  the  trial.  The  rod  our  all-wise  Father  will  not 
withhold.  And  what  a  mercy  it  is  to  be  able  to  bear  the  rod, 
and  to  see  the  cause  !  But  how  often  do  we  close  our  ears, 
and  go  on  in  our  crooked  way  until  he  speaks  by  some  louder 
and  yet  heavier  blow !  and  then  it  is  our  mercy  to  run  at  once 
into  the  tender,  loving  bosom  of  God,  confess  our  sin,  and  beg 
for  renewed  grace,  to  enable  us  to  forsake  it.  I  do  not  think 
there  was  ever  one  of  His  own  dear  children  who  more  re- 
quired this  discipline  than  myself.  I  seem  to  need  the  rod  all 
the  way  to  heaven.  Well,  if  I  can  only  see  a  Father's  loving 
hand  in  it  all,  and  it  does  but  endear  Christ  to  me,  it  is  weliy 

"  Lord's-day. — I  am  still  poorly,  and  kept  at  home.  You 
are  now  in  the  midst  of  your  sermons.  May  the  Lord's  sen- 
sible presence  be  with  you.  May  you  preach  as  if  the  Lord's 
eye,  not  the  eyes  of  the  people,  were  full  upon  you.  May  the 
Iloly  Ghost  clothe  His  truth  with  power,  that  every  soul  may 
hear  and  feel  it,  and  that  great  good  may  be  done  in  the  name 
of  Jesus,  sinners  converted,  and  saints  rc-converted ;  the  one 
is  as  much  needed  as  the  other.  Nature  sometimes  puts  on  a 
show  of  religion,  and  will  go  a  great  way  vrhile  i\\Q  heart  is 


350  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

not  changed,  and  the  fear  of  God  and  the  love  of  the  Spirit  is 
not  there,  and  is  not  known.  Thousands,  I  fear,  deceive  them- 
selves into  this  resemblance  of  religion  ;  and  it  is  a  great  mercy, 
if,  when  death  looks  them  in  the  face,  the  Lord  divests  them 
of  all  false  confidence,  and  brings  them  guilty  to  the  Fountain 
open  for  sin  and  uncleanness.  Then,  and  then  only,  do  thoy 
know  what  real  conversion  is — sorrow  for  sin,  and  joy  in  God." 

"Yesterday  I  was  enabled  to  go  twice  to  the  House  of  God, 
and  the  Lord  did  bless  the  truths  I  heard,  and  sweetly  drew 
out  my  heart's  best  affections  to  Himself,  particularly  at  the 
Supper,  and  during  the  reading  and  singing  of  the  hymns.  As 
dear  Mrs.  Graham  says,  '  My  memory  fails  me  as  to  the  text, 
&c.,  and  yet  my  soul  is  fed  and  strengthened  by  the  word.'  " 

The  illness  and  death  of  one  who  had  sustained  to  her  for 
above  twenty  years  the  closest  relation  of  a  friend,  and  the  yet 
more  sacred  and  enduring  relation  of  a  pastor — during  which 
period  not  a  wavelet  had  ruffled  the  surface,  nor  a  cloud  had 
shaded  the  glow  of  a  friendship  which  God  had  made  the 
channel  of  so  much  mutual  blessing — would  naturally  elicit 
some  of  the  tenderest  features  of  her  Christianity.  Hearing 
of  the  illness  of  the  Rev,  J.  H.  Evans,  she  thus  seeks  to  com- 
fort and  cheer  him  : — 

" Yes,  beloved,  even  your  present  trial  shall  be  to 

the  praise  of  His  dear  and  holy  name.  Be  of  good  cheer  ! 
God  has  commissioned  it  as  a  message  of  love,  nothing  but 
love, — eternal,  never-ending  love.  The  Lord  sent  you  to 
preach  glad  tidings  to  poor,  lost  sinners,  to  gather  in  His  own 
sheep,  feeding  them  in  rich  pastures,  and  causing  them  to  lie 
down  by  the  side  of  still  waters.  But  now  He  has  closed 
your  lips  for  a  season.  He  who  sent  you  to  preach,  now  bids 
you  cease  until  He  says,  *  Go  again,  and  preach  the  preaching 
that  I  bid  thee.'  Well,  beloved,  is  He  not  as  full  of  love  in 
all  this  as  ever?  Just  the  very  same.  Only  trust  Him  for 
all  consequences.  He  is  doing  all  things  well.  Leave  your- 
self in  His  blessed  hands,  and  seek  more  for  cheerful  submission 
than  for  the  removal  of  the  trial.  Be  earnest  for  submission, 
and  He  will  give  it,  and  resignation  will  follow,  and  then,  what 
a  calm  !  Oh,  how  soothing  is  the  voice  of  the  Beloved  !  How 
it  hushes  to  rest  all  the  agitated  feelings !  To  be  quiet  in  His 
hands,  and  feel  that  His  will  must  be  best,  because  He  is  God, 
and  knows  the  end  from  the  beginning,  Avhile  we  know  noth- 
ino: !     All  our  wisdom  is  in  cur  adorable  Head.     How  earnest 


LETTERS   TO    REV.    J.    H.    EVANS.  351 

and  restless  I  was  to  be  liealed  (when  lame),  but  no  healing 
came,  until  prompted  by  the  Spirit  to  ask  for  submission,  and 
in  a  moment  it  was  given  !  God  the  Holy  Ghost  indited  the 
petition,  and  God  the  Father  heard  it,  and  all  was  peace  within. 
And  what  then  ?  After  awhile  the  healing  most  unexpectedly 
came,  and  I  was  made  whole.  So  may  it  be  with  you,  my 
tried  and  beloved  brother.  Be  assured  this  affliction  is  sent 
for  some  special  good,  and  a  great  blessing  to  your  own  soul 
and  to  the  church  at  large.  I  would  not  now  have  been  with- 
out my  trial  for  a  thousand  worlds.  Oh,  the  goodness  of  God ! 
His  name  is  love,  and  wondrous  is  He  in  all  His  dealings  with 
us ;  and  He  is  deahng  with  us  every  moment  of  our  brief  ex- 
istence, and  we  are  dealing  with  Him.  How  little  does  the 
world  know  of  the  wonderful  transaction  that  is  going  on  every 
instant  between  earth  and  heaven — the  constant  intercourse 
between  God  and  His  chosen  and  adopted  family  !  But  why 
should  I  enlarge  upon  this  subject  to  one  so  much  better  taught 
than  I  am?  Only  you  are  now  in  the  trial,  and  I  have  just 
come  out  of  it,  and  may  be  allowed  to  speak  a  word  of  comfort 
to  your  dear  and  tried  soul.  Be  assured  it  will  be  well,  it  must 
be  well,  for  it  is  the  Lord  who  doth  all  things  well.  Many 
are  the  afflictions  of  the  righteous  :  hut  the  Lord  delivereth  him 
out  of  them  all.  I  believe,  though  the  Lord  may  try  your 
faith  to  the  utmost,  yet  that  He  will  appear  for  you ;  only 
leave  yourself  in  His  loving  hands.  Some  great  good  will 
come  out  of  this  trial.  It  is  much  more  difficult  to  be  quiet 
and  passive  than  to  labour.  We  want  always  to  be  doing ; 
but  the  Lord  says.  Be  stilly  and  knoiu  that  I  am  God.  Fare- 
well !  May  the  Lord  comfort,  heal,  and  guide  you  in  every 
step  you  take,  and  enable  you  to  repose  passive  in  His  dear 
hands,  is  the  prayer  of  your  affectionate  sister  in  a  precious 
Jesus." 

"Beloved  brother  and  fellow-traveller  in  the  kingdom  of 
God,  it  is  through  much  tribulation  we  are  to  enter  into  His 
kingdom  of  glory  above.  I  have  heard  of  the  late  trial  your 
Father  has  sent  in  much  love.  When  we  arrive  at  home,  and 
trace  our  steps  through  this  wilderness,  we  shall  see  that  every 
trial,  cross,  and  disappointment  was  needful,  and  that  the  work 
would  not  have  been  complete  without  all,  even  the  least. 
Our  loving  God  and  Father  takes  no  pleasure  in  afflicting  us; 
but  it  is  by  these  things  we  are  brought  to  be  better  acquainted 
with  ourselves  and  with  Him,     He  does  it  all.     Even  this  fall 


352  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

from  the  carriage  is  designed  to  produce  some  great  good.  .  .  . 
Can  anything  happen  to  you  or  to  me  but  what  God  does  in 
love  to  our  souls?  Oh,  that  He  may  remove  every  wish 
contrary  to  His  present  dispensation  towards  you,  giving  you 
cheerful  submission  1  He  will  take  care  of  His  own  church. 
John-street  church  is  His,  not  yours.  Be  not  any  more  care- 
ful about  it.  The  Lord  wants  to  have  you  to  himself;  and  oh, 
you  will  find  it  sweet  to  be  alone  with  Jesus !  Is  it  not  a 
great  and  might  privilege  to  be  shut  out  from  labor,  and  to  be 
shut  in  with  Grod  ?  You  will  yet  see  the  goodness  and  loving- 
kindness  of  God  in  thus  setting  you  aside  from  your  work, 
pleasant  as  it  was  to  you,  and  keeping  you  for  Himself.  I 
feel  quite  sure,  dear  and  beloved  brother,  that  you  will  have  to 
bless  and  praise  Him  for  all  His  present  dealings  with  you. 
He  will  open  his  ever-loving  heart  to  you,  and  you  shall  see 
more  of  the  heart  of  God  than  ever  you  have  done  before.  .  .  . 
Oh,  that  we  could  always  believe  all  that  He  says  of  Himself! 
He  is  the  same  God  that  He  was  to  Abraham,  Isaac  and  Jacob. 
Does  He  not  often  speak  to  us  now  by  the  still,  small  voice  of 
His  Spirit,  and  does  He  not  allow  us  often  to  speak  to  Him  as 
a  man  would  to  his  dearest  friend  ?  "Will  He  not  do  us  all  the 
good  we  need?  Are  we  not  in  His  heart,  and  can  anything 
happen  to  us  but  what  He  designs,  and  comes  to  us  with  a 
blessing?  Are  we  not  one  with  Christ,  and  is  not  Christ  one 
with  us  ?  And  now,  dear,  precious  brother,  if  you  have  had 
patience  to  wade  through  this,  accept  my  thanks,  and  be 
assured  I  often  have  you  in  my  mind  and  on  my  heart.  Cast 
all  your  care  on  Him,  for  He  careth  for  you.  He  will  do  all 
things  for  you  and  for  John-street  church  too.  He  is  better 
able  to  bear  the  burden  than  you  are.  Lie  contented  in  His 
loving  hands,  and  let  Him  take  His  own  way  with  you.  You 
would  be  working  for  Him,  but  He  says  to  you,  'Be  still,  and 
know  that  I  am  the  best  Judge  of  what  is  good  for  you !' 
Heaven  will  be  no  idle  place.  God  has  a  work  for  you  there. 
I  love  to  think  of  heaven.  What  a  change  !  To  see  and  be 
with  Jesus — to  be  like  Him — a  pure  spirit  mingling  with  pure 
spirits — perfect  holiness — perfect  love.  Let  us  take  courage 
and  look  up.  My  love  to  your  dear  wife.  Let  us  join  to 
praise  and  bless  our  God  that  He  has  spared  your  life,  and  may 
you  be  able  to  trust  Him  fully  to  the  end." 

About  three  months  after  the  preceding  letters  were  written, 
we  find  the  following  mournful  record  in  her  diary : — 


353 

"December  4,  1849. — Heard  to-day  of  dear  Mr.  Evan's 
escape  from  a  bodj  of  suffering  to  a  land  of  glory.  It  took 
place  on  the  1st,  at  about  six  o'clock  in  the  morning.  He 
died  in  Scotland,  and  the  remains  are  to  be  brought  to  town 
for  interment  on  the  6th.  Praise  G-od  for  the  blessed  and  good 
hope,  through  grace,  of  life  eternal  beyond  the  grave.  A  letter, 
addressed  to  the  church,  thus  speaks  of  some  of  his  closing 
moments :  '  I  said  to  him,  I  felt  sure  that  prayer  was  made  for 
liim  that  day,  and  that  I  had  written  to  the  church  that  he  was 
worse.'  He  said,  '  You  should  tell  them  the  state  of  my  mind.' 
I  then  asked  him  if  he  had  any  message,  and  he  answered, 
'  Tell  them  I  stand  accepted  in  the  Beloved,  notwithstanding 
all  my  sins  and  infirmity.'  In  a  minute  after,  he  proceeded, 
'I  never  felt  more  than  now  my  sins,  but  in  Jesus  I  stand, 
Jesus  is  a  panacea.'  It  being  previously  remarked  how  soon 
he  would  be  with  Jesus,  in  a  few  minutes  he  said,  'And  am  I 
so  near  eternal  glory,  and  not  more  rejoicing  in  it?'  It  was 
replied,  'But  do  you;'  to  which  he  answered,  'In  a  measure.' 
When  sympathy  and  tenderness  were  expressed  to  him,  he  said, 
'But  soon  to  be  with  Jesus,  whom  I  love — who  loved  me 
before  I  loved  Him.'  And  now  he  is  luiili  Jesus^  partaking  of 
His  fulness  of  joy,  happiness  and  glory.  The  days  of  his 
mourning  are  ended  for  ever." 

This  deeply-felt  bereavement  elicited  the  following  character- 
istic letter  of  sacred  sympathy,  addressed  to  the  w4dow  of  her 
lamented  pastor: — 

December  15,  1849. 

"My  dear  and  prp:cious  Sister  in  the  Lord, — 

"I  think  I  wrote  you  such  an  unfeeling  letter  yester- 
day, that  I  have  been  quite  distressed  about  it;  but  I  did  so 
fully  and  truly  realize  the  joy,  the  glory,  the  full,  overflowing 
cup  of  happiness  of  the  dear  departed  one,  that  I  did  not,  as  I 
ought  to  have  done,  sufficiently  consider  your  loneliness,  deep 
sorrow,  and  long  dreary  nights  of  watching,  while  looking 
upon  suffering  you  had  no  power  to  alleviate;  and  now  those 
sorrowful  hours  and  scenes  are  passing  before  your  imagination, 
and  Satan  will  be  busy  in  bringing  them  to  your  recollection, 
for  he  seeks  to  harass  those  whom  God  loves.  May  faith  be 
given  to  you  to  enable  you  to  look  above,  and  in  due  time  to 
rejoice  with  him  in  spirit,  who  now  no  longer  is  a  sufferer  here 
in  this  vale  of  tears,  and  who  would  say  to  you,  '  Weep  no 
more  for  me,  for  the   days  of  mv  mourninsr   are  ended,  and  1 


354  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

have  entered  into  the  joy  of  my  Lord.  I  have  seen  Jesus 
whom  I  loved,  and  lo  !  the  half  of  His  glory,  His  goodness,  and 
His  love,  was  not  told  me  while  below.'  Dear  sister,  ere  long, 
and  we  shall  both  be  away  too,  and  we  shall  see  him  again, 
and  all  spend  a  glorious  and  an  endless  eternity  together." 

"There  is  so  much  lurking  infidelity  in  our  fjillen  nature, 
that  we  httle  reahze  what  God  has  said  in  His  blessed  word, 
and  therefore  we  do  so  little  go  on  our  way  rejoicing.  It  will 
be  according  to  our  faith,  here  and  there  too.  It  is  faith  that 
enables  us  to  realize  what  the  Lord  has  promised,  and  brings 
us  into  close  contact  with  Christ  here;  and  in  the  same  pro- 
portion as  we  have  Christ  in  our  souls  here,  we  shall  have 
Christ  in  our  souls  there.  And  although  there  will  be  no  lack 
to  any — for  every  vessel  will  be  full — yet  the  larger  vessels 
will  hold  more  in  the  very  same  proportion  they  did  here  below. 
So  that  we  need,  not  only  for  our  present  comfort  and  useful- 
ness, to  live  upon  Christ  as  much  as  we  can  here,  but  with  the 
blessed  hope  before  us  of  enjoying  Him  to  the  utmost  when  we 
hereafter  shall  arrive  in  the  regions  of  the  blessed.  Such  is 
now  my  dear  brother's  complete  felicity.  He  is  with  Jesus, 
and  Jesus  is  with  him.  His  vessel  is  full,  and  it  will  be 
enlarging  through  eternity,  capable  of  holding  more  and  more 
of  God,  and  that  throughout  the  existence  of  God  Himself.  I 
am  persuaded  we  are  great  losers  by  not  fully  realizing  what 
God  has  promised  us,  and  by  not  dwelling  more  on  the  glorious 
realities  of  the  world  to  come,  and  also  by  losing  sight  of  our 
nearness  to  Christ.  Christ  has  been  with  you  in  all  your  late 
deep  trial,  and  He  is  with  you  now.  See  what  a  Friend  you 
have  by  your  side — to  talk  to  in  your  solitude — to  tell  Him  all 
you  feel  and  fear,  all  you  wish  and  want !  Oh,  what  a  Friend 
is  Jesus!  He  is  better  than  ten  thousand  husbands  and  children. 
What  a  Friend  has  he  been  to  worthless  me  !  I  could  not  live 
without  Hmi  here,  nor  in  heaven  either.  He  is  the  chief  of  all 
my  joys,  and  my  comfort  by  day  and  by  night.  Dear,  precious 
sister,  sucli  will  He  be  to  you.  The  Lord  says  to  you,  '  Cleave 
to  Me.  I  am  thine,  and  thou  art  mine.  Ask  what  you  will, 
and  I  will  do  it.  Ask,  that  your  joy  may  be  full.  I  will 
never  leave  thee  nor  forsake  thee.  Keep  thy  steadfast  eye 
upon  thine  inheritance;  a  few  more  days  of  trial,  and  thou  shalt 
be  Avith  Me.'  I  would  f  lin  comfort  you  with  the  comfort  with 
wliicli  God  has  comforted  me.  This  life  is  a  dark  passage  to 
a  world  of  liglit  and  glory  above.     Many  whom  we  love  are 


r.KTTKRS    FROM    HER    LATE    PASTOR.  ^00 

there,  having  outrun  us  in  the  race ;  but  we  shall  meet  them 
again,  and  recount  together  all  the  way  He  has  led  us  through 
the  wilderness ;  and,  if  there  could  be  weeping  in  heaven,  we 
should  weep  there,  that  we  so  faintly  beheved  all  He  told  us 
while  here." 

But  two  unpuljlished  notes  addressed  to  her  by  Mr.  Evans, 
remain.  They  are  so  beautifully  characteristic  of  the  writer, 
that  they  may  form  a  befitting  close  to  the  reference  which 
this  volume  has  so  frequently  and  necessarily  made  to  this 
eminent  Christian,  and  beloved  and  lamented  minister  of 
Christ. 

"  My  beloved  Friend, — 

"  Grace,  mercy,  and  peace  be  with  you  and  yours. 
All  things  are  in  the  hands  of  that  Jesus  whom  we  love,  and 
who,  wonderful  thought !  loves  us.  He  bears  us  and  our  low 
concerns  upon  His  heart,  and  into  those  hands  would  I  ever 
commit  myself  and  mine.  He  who  has  borne  my  sins,  must 
bear  my  sorrows  and  cares,  great  and  small.  .  .  .  However 
sweet  the  stream,  the  channel  down  which  it  flows  and  the 
source  from  whence  it  springs  give  it  a  double  sweetness.  On 
the  Lord  will  I  wait,  and  for  Him  too.  My  dear  sister,  we 
shall  soon  be  in  the  eternal  world — with  Jesus — eternally 
happy,  and  infinitely,  in  Him.  This  may  well  lift  us  above 
all  anxiety.  I  last  night  preached  Balch's  funeral  sermon. 
The  chapel  was  crowded,  and  the  subject  was  deeply  solemn, 
and  I  as  usual,  was  alas  !  alas  !  very  much  below  the  occasion. 
But  the  Lord  will  humble  me  in  the  pulpit.  It  is  my  dispen- 
sation— in  tender  love  does  He  it — and  I  need  it.  With  kind 
Christian  regards,  and  affectionate  remembrance  to  your 
daughther,  ever  believe  me,  dear  sister, 

"Your  ever  affectionate, 

"J.  H.  Evans." 

"My    dear   and   beloved    Sister   in    a   precious 
Saviour, — 

"How  great  is  our  mercy  that  we  know  Christ,  or 
rather,  are  known  of  Him !  and  how  cheering  is  the  thought 
that  we,  through  wondrous  grace,  shall  soon  see  Him  whom 
our  soul  loveth !  Your  letter  refreshed  our  souls.  It  was 
sweet  to  us.  It  had  the  savour  of  His  name  in  it ;  and  by  the 
power  of  the  same  Spirit  who  indited  it,  was  it  made  as  oint- 
ment to  our  souls.     Dear  and  precious  sister,  we  are  but  slow 


MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

learners  of  the  two  great  truths  of  the  gospel ;  the  one,  that 
*bj  grace  ye  are  saved;' the  other,  'Christ  is  all.'  And  I 
believe  that  they  are  but  half  learned,  even  at  the  last.  Oh, 
how  deep  is  the  power  of  sin  and  Satan,  ignorance  and  unbelief, 
•in  our  poor  hearts !  all  working  together  to  hide  this  precious 
object  from  our  sight.  How  often  do  even  lawful  things,  and 
things  which  in  themselves  He  approves  of,  still  tend  to  this, 
except  the  blessed  Spirit  breaks  through  all  and  shows  Him 
to  us! 

"And  yet  amidst  all  our  neglects,  and  coldness,  and  ingrati- 
tude, still  He  bears  with  us,  comes  over  the  mountains  of  our 
base  forgetfuhiess,  and  restoreth  our  souls.  I  am  sometimes 
led  to  think,  that  even  in  heaven  one  shall  weep  to  think  of 
the  returns  which  He  has  received  from  our  treatment  of  Him  ; 
but  all  tears  shall  be  wiped  away,  if  any  are  shed  there,  by 
His  own  blessed  hands. 

"It  will  rejoice  you,  I  am  well  assured,  to  be  told  by  me, 
that  I  am  wonderfully  better  than  I  was;  and,  although  the 
complaint  has  not  quite  left  me,  yet,  through  the  tender  mercy 
of  our  God  and  Father,  it  has  nearly  done  so.  For  fourteen 
nights  I  was  quite  unable  to  lie  down  in  my  bed,  and  they 
were  generally  sleepless  nights.  But  I  was  not  alone,  and  I  felt 
it.  I  fully  believe  dear  sister,  that  this  attack  has  an  especial 
message  in  it.  May  the  Eternal  Spirit  cause  me  to  learn  it,  yea, 
all  of  it;  unimproved  mercies — and  such  are  trials,  overlooked; 
the  loving  hand  which  sends  them,  and  the  infinite  necessity 
there  w^as  for  them  ;  the  secret  sins  they  are  meant  to  detect ; 
and  the  gracious  discoveries  they  are  intended  to  disclose  of 
the  unutterable  fulness  of  Jesus  and  the  Divine  goodness, — are 
very  serious  things. 

"I  have  lost  much  by  this  in  past  days.  May  He  who  is 
able,  give  me  full  possession  of  this  especial  dispensation. 
With  my  very  kindest  love  to  dear  0 ,  and  every  affec- 
tionate remembrance  to  all  his,  and  especial  affection  to  E ; 

and  with  every  prayer  that  your  own  soul  may  be  filled  with 
all  the  fulness  of  God, 

"  Ever  yours,  with  truest  affection, 

"J.  H.  Evans." 

How  unconsciously  did  she  betray  her  own  spiritual  progress 
in  her  anxiety  for  the  advance  of  Christ's  kingdom  in  the  souls 
of  others !     Writing  to  a  beloved  family  whose  parent   pre- 


SOLICITUDE    FOR   SPIRITUAL   PROGRESS.  357 

ceded  her  only  a  few  weeks  previous  to  her  own  departure  to 
the  "rest  that  remaineth  for  the  people  of  God,"  she  earnestly 
inquires : — 

"How  is  it,  dear,  dear  friends,  with  your  precious  souls? 
Are  you  speeding  on  your  way  ?  I  have  not  heard  from  you 
of  late.  Is  there  not  one  among  you  to  tell  me  how  matters 
stand  between  you  and  our  best  Friend  ?  Are  there  no  new 
communications  from  above?  Have  you  nothing  to  say  to  a 
poor  weary  traveller,  on  the  same  road  with  yourself?  Well, 
I  must  say  a  little  about  it  to  you,  which  may  encourage  us 
all, — me  to  write,  and  you  to  join  me  to  praise  and  bless  His 
holy  name  who  is  preparing  us  all  for  that  happy,  blessed  place 
He  has  gone  to  prepare  for  us.  How  little,  beloved,  do  we 
think  of  this  as  we  ought!  How  faintly  we  realize  it! 
How  little  do  we  believe  what  God  has  promised  us.  Oh, 
for  a  stronger  faith  to  give  full  credit  to  what  we  read  of  God's 
word!  We  are  travelling  home  to  God.  This  is  not,  and 
never  was  intended  to  be,  our  rest.  It  is  a  wilderness  we  are 
passing  through,  and  shame,  shame  to  us,  that  we  so  often  want 
to  sit  down  amidst  its  weeds  and  briers,  and  amuse  ourselves 
with  the  trifles  of  a  fallen  world  lying  in  the  wicked  one.  All 
here  is  polluted  and  tainted  by  sin,  therefore  does  Christ  say, 
ArisCj  my  love,  my  fair  one,  and  come  away.  Dear  friends, 
tell  me  how  it  fares  with  your  souls.  Do  you  find  Christ  more 
precious  day  by  day.  Let  us  keep  very  near  to  Him,  sensibly 
so.  Oh,  there  is  a  joy  unspeakable  in  walking  near  to  Jesus — 
m  having  daily,  sweet  holy  intercourse  with  Him — never 
satisfied  to  have  our  best  Friend  out  of  sight !" 

"  6th. — Beloved  in  the  Lord,  I  do  love  you  all  most  tenderly, 
not  only  in  Christ,  but  for  your  own  sakes  too,  and  cannot  be 
reconciled  to  lose  sight  of  you ;  so  do  let  hear.  I  have  this  one 
evidence,  if  I  have  no  other,  of  my  election  of  God — I  love 
all  the  saints  in  the  bowels  of  Jesus  Christ.  I  feel  a  oneness 
to  them  that  I  feel  to  no  other.  But  oh,  what  will  that  love 
be  when  we  get  above  ?  It  is  there  I  am  looking.  There  is 
my  only,  my  best  Friend,  and  there  is  my  heart.  Behold 
Him  seated  on  His  throne,  and  all  the  goodly  company  of  the 
redeemed  around  Him.  Oh,  the  blessedness  of  beholding  all 
His  unveiled  beauties,  and  of  basking  in  the  sunshine  of  His 
countenance  !  Does  not  your  heart  burn  within  you  when  you 
think  of  these  things — these  glorious  realities?  My  heart  is 
full  to  overflowing ;  for  I  have  just  been  at  His  blessed  foot- 


358  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

Btool,  and  had  a  few  holy,  precious  moments  of  intercourse 
with  Him.  But  I  must  tell  you  of  two  sermons  yesterday. 
In  the  morning,  from  the  words.  He  endured  as  seeing  Him 
who  is  invisible. — Heb.  xi,  27.  In  this  discourse  Jehovah  was 
exhibited  as  revealed  in  Jesus.  Jesus,  the  visible  manifesta- 
tion of  the  invisible  Grod.  In  the  evening,  from  the  words, 
Bat  ive  see  Jesus,  Heb.  ii.  9.  I  cannot  express  to  you  how  my 
heart  rejoiced  in  God  my  Saviour,  while  listening  to  such  an 
exhibition  of  His  glory,  though  robed  in  humanity  for  our 
redemption.  I  wept  for  joy;  my  heart  was  overflowing. 
Well  beloved,  we  shall  all  soon  see  Him  eye  to  eye,  face  to 
face.  Do  not  let  us  lose  sight  of  Him  altogether.  There  is 
much  of  heaven  to  be  enjoyed  while  here,  a  foretaste  of  what 
we  shall  realize  through  eternity.  Let  us  hold  fast  the  pro- 
fession of  our  faith,  without  wavering.     We   are  pretty  well. 

Dear  little  E ,  from  her   spinal  affection,  is  still  reclining 

upon  her  back.  This  is  a  trial  of  faith,  but  we  must  all  have 
them ;  they  are  good  for  us — are  disguised  blessings.  Nothing 
but  good  from  the  hands  of  Him  who  loved  us  unto  the  death. 
He  could  do  no  more  than  die  for  us.  Yes,  He  rose  again. 
Blessed  be  His  dear  name.  He  did  all  that  He  could  to  save 
us  from  eternal  woe,  and  bring  us  to  eternal  glory.  Farewell, 
beloved  sister  in  a  beloved  Lord.  May  you  enjoy  much  of 
His  presence." 


TO    HER    SON    O- 


"     ....     I     went,    according   to    invitation,    to    the 

T 's  yesterday.     The  admiral  led  me  down  to  lunch,  and 

afterwards  left,  to  meet  an  engagement.  We  retired  to  the 
drawing-room,  and  had  a  sweet  conversation.  I  think  Christ 
was  there,  for    our    communion  was    of  Hitn.     You    will  be 

amused  to  hear  that  Lady  C (Lady  T -'s  mother)  and 

myself  met  at  a  dinner-party  in  Bermuda,  fifty-seven  years 
ago,  both  of  us  then  young,  and  but  recently  married!  Now 
we  meet  as  old  ladies,  but,  best  of  all,  as  followers  of  the  Lamb, 
saved  and  sanctified  by  sovereign  grace.  How  strangely 
people  are  thrown  together  in  this  wide,  wide,  wilderness  world! 
But,  oh,  the  home  of  the  blessed,  where  all  the  saints  shall 
meet,  and  know  as  they  are  known!  I  am  reading  your  book, 
every  now  and  then ;  may  the  Lord  bless  it  to  the  quickening 
of  saints  and  sinners.     I  cannot  but  think  it  would  be  better  to 


LETTER   TO    HER   SON,  0 .  359 

place  quotations  from  God's  word  in  italics.*  I  had  a  sweet, 
refreshing,  and  heartbreaking  view  of  the  infinite  goodness  of 
God  on  first  rising  this  morning.  It  was  a  melting  of  love  to 
my  soul,  so  plainly  could  I  read  my  interest  in  Christ,  and  my 
title  to  my  home  in  heaven.  I  have  not  lost  its  richness  yet, 
nor  the  deep  sense  of  my  worthlessness.  Truly,  the  goodness 
of  God  leadeth  to  repentance.  I  did  not  forget  you.  May  the 
Lord's  choicest  blessings  rest  upon  you  all !" 

"  Sabbath  Morning, — I  have  just  been  praying  for  you. 
Oh,  that  He  might  answer  the  prayer,  and  put  strength  in 
body  and  soul,  and  the  fulness  of  the  Spirit  in  the  word 
preached,  that  all  may  feel  that  the  Lord  of  a  truth  has  sent 
you  with  a  message  of  mercy  to  all  who  hear  it !  ...  This  is 
another  cause  of  gratitude  to  Him  who  deals  so  lovingly  and 
graciously  towards  us.  Let  us  praise  Him  now,  and  praise 
not  only  with  our  lips,  but  may  our  lives  show  forth  His  praise, 
by  walking  before  Him  in  all  the  holy  precepts  of  the  Gospel. 
If  ye  love  Affi,  keoj)  my  commandments.  Not  one  nor  two  only, 
but  all.  It  is  not  given  us  to  choose  which  we  shall  keep,  and 
which  we  shall  break.  Oh,  for  a  closer  walk !  To  walk  in 
company  with  Jesus — side  by  side — my  hand  in  His  hand — 
my  eye  on  His  eye — my  heart  ever  toward  Him  ;  this  is  fel- 
lowship with  God's  dear  Son.  How  have  I  been  wrestling  for 
you  to  day  !  May  He  give  you  a  holy,  happy  Sabbath  !  May 
the  word  be  attended  with  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost  to 
every  soul  present !  I  have  prayed  for  quietness  of  soul,  and 
for  healing  for  the  poor  head." 

Her  pen,  always  at  home  in  the  Lord's  work,  was  never 

*  A  striking  coincidence  of  opinion  on  tliis  point  with  that  of  Mrs. 
Isabella  Grraham,  whom  she  personally  knew,  and  whom  in  so  many 
features  she  resembled,  may  be  worthy  of  note,  "  Mrs.  Graham,"  ob- 
serves her  biographer,  '•  was  very  partial  to  the  works  of  Dr.  John  Owen, 
the  Rev.  W.  Romaine.  and  the  Rev.  John  Newton,  and  read  them  with 
pleasure  and  profit.  One  day  she  remarked  to  Mr.  Bethune,  that  she 
preferred  the  ancient  writers  on  theology  to  the  modern,  because  they 
dealt  more  in  italics.  'Dear  mother,' he  replied,  'what  religion  can 
there  be  in  italics?'  'You  know,'  said  she,  -that  old  writers  expected 
credit  for  tiie  doctrines  they  taught  by  proving  them,  from  the  word  of 
God,  to  be  correct:  they  inserted  the  Scripture  pas-ages  in  italics,  and 
their  works  have  been  sometimes  one-half  in  italics.  Modem  writers  on 
theology,  on  the  contrary,  give  us  a  long  train  of  reasoning  to  persuade 
us  to  their  opinions,  but  very  little  in  italics.'  This  remark  of  hers  has 
great  force  in  it,  and  deserves  the  attention  of  those  who  write,  and  those 
who  read,  on  theological  subjects." — Life  of  Mrs.  Lmhdla  Grahim. 


360  MEMOIR    OP   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

more  appropriatelj  or  usefully  employed  than  in  imparting 
spiritual  instruction  and  encouragement  to  individuals  anxiously 
and  earnestly  seeking  the  Saviour.  To  her  own  heart  He  was 
so  truly  precious,  and  to  her  mind  to  believe  in  Him  was  so 
exceedingly  simple,  that  it  was  her  peculiar  delight  to  meet 
and  aid  a  soul  earnestly  asking  the  way  of  salvation.  To 
specimens  of  her  letters  addressed  to  the  unconverted — to  those 
of  Christian  sympathy — and  to  others  appropriate  to  various 
circumstances  and  states  of  mind,  we  add  a  few  selections  from 
her  correspondence,  especially  illustrating  her  peculiar  gift  in 
leading  the  anxious,  tremulous  mind  to  a  full  repose  in  Christ. 


TO    LADY    A.    DE    CAPEL    B- 


''  Dear  Lady  B April  20. 

"  How  kind  of  you  to  write  to  me  that  little  note, 
when  your  suffering  head  must  have  rendered  it  an  exertion ! 
It  is  a  mercy  for  you  and  me  that  there  is  a  Head  w^hich  is 
always  right,  and  a  heart,  too,  that  is  ever  disposed  to  do  us  all 
possible  good.  Oh,  to  have  such  a  Friend  as  Jesus  is  in  the 
court  of  heaven,  who  feels  all  our  sorrows,  carries  all  our  bur- 
dens, and  has  promised  to  bring  us  safely  through  this  trying 
world,  and  place  us  at  last  at  His  own  right  hand,  where  neither 
sickness  nor  sorrow  shall  ever  come  !  Dear  friend,  let  me  com- 
mend you  to  keep  close  to  this  precious  Friend,  who  can  only 
be  spiritually  known  and  seen  by  the  eye  of  faith.  To  all 
others  he  is  invisible.  Faith  can  discern  Him  when  sense  ut- 
terly fails.  But  it  is  our  mercy,  that,  though  this  world  knows 
and  sees  Him  not,  yet  He  does  and  will  make  Himself  known 
to  those  who  seek  Him  with  their  whole  heart.  Oh,  the  kind- 
ness, the  loving-kindness  that  fills  the  heart  of  Jesus  towards 
one  poor  feeble  soul  who  can  but  waft  a  sigh,  a  wish,  a  desire 
towards  Him !  To  such.  His  heart  in  a  moment  responds. 
Oh,  how  attentively  He  listens  to  hear,  and  how  eager  to 
respond  to  tlie  first  pulsation  that  arises  in  the  soul  towards 
Himself!  That  desire  to  know  and  love  Him  is  the  blessed 
work  of  His  own  Holy  Spirit.  Dear  friend,  go  to  Him  just  as 
you  are,  nor  rest  short  of  a  holy,  familiar,  abiding  sense  of  His 
presence.  To  know  Him  is  life,  and  life  eternal.  He  says,  / 
a7n  the  way,  the  truth,  and  the  life.  How  sweetly  and  lovingly 
He  invites  us.  Come  unto  me,  all  ye  that  labour  and  are  heavy 
laden,  and  I  will  give  you  rest.  If  you  and  I  have  come  and 
cast  ourselves  at  His  blessed  feet,  we  need  fear  nothing,  for 


LETTERS   TO    H.    AND    E.  S .  361 

He  will  do  all  things  well  for  us,  here  and  hereafter.  I  could 
fill  a  dozen  sheets  on  this  precious  subject,  but  will  not  fatigue 
you  to  read  more  than  is  needful  to  assure  you  of  my  sincere 
desire  and  good  wishes  for  returning  health,  and  that  body  and 

soul  may  prosper.     My  Christian  love  to  dear  Miss  T , 

She  belongs  to  Jesus,  and  is  one  of  His  fold.  My  sheep  hear 
ray  voice^  and  I  know  them,  and  they  follow  me.  I  know  my 
sheep,  and  am  known  of  mine.  Oh,  it  is  a  mercy  of  mercies  to 
know  Jesus  as  my  Shepherd.  May  he  draw  you  nearer  and 
nearer  to  Himself." 

TO    H.    AND    E.    S . 


"  My  beloved  Friends, — 

"  I  have  been  thinking  of  you,  and  thinking  of  Jesus 
too.  What  a  heart  has  Christ !  Do  you  know  what  it  is 
made  of?  It  is  an  ocean  of  goodness.  It  is  a  sea,  fathomless 
and  shoreless,  of  matchless  love — ^love  to  poor  sinners  who  but 
look  to  Him  or  sigh  for  Him.  It  is  the  joy  of  His  heart  to 
save  sinners.  This  was  His  express  mission  to  our  world. 
Then  would  I  have  you  look,  not  to  your  evidences,  or  to  your 
own  goodness,  or  to  your  unworthiness,  but  to  Jesus,  with  a 
believing  heart,  and  you  shall  be  saved  in  Christ  and  for 
Christ.  By  simply  believing  in  the  Lord  Jesus,  He  becomes 
one  with  you,  and  you  one  with  Him,  the  Holy  Spirit  taking 
possession  of  your  souls  for  Himself.  In  a  little  while,  and  we 
pass  away,  and  one  thing  only  is  needful.  Come,  then,  to 
Jesus,  and  be  saved ;  and  give  Him  no  rest  until  He  manifests 
Himself  to  you,  as  He  has  promised.  We  tvill  come  and  mani- 
fest ourselves  unto  you.  This  manifestation  of  the  Lord  Jesus 
Christ  to  your  souls,  when  you  experience  it,  will  be  worth 
more  than  millions  of  worlds  to  you.  I  am  convinced  you  will 
echo  this  when  you  receive  the  blessing.  He  waits  to  be 
gracious,  lingers  for  your  coming,  just  as  you  are,  not  waiting 
to  make  yourselves  more  acceptable.  He  undertakes  to  make 
you  all  you  ought  to  be,  and  will  work  in  you  to  will  and  to 
do,  and  all  that  is  pleasing  in  His  sight." 

"  If  you  will  cultivate  the  habit  of  going  and  telling  Jesus 
all  you  wish  or  fear,  you  will  find  in  Him  a  hearkening  ear ; 
and  thus  you  will  become  acquainted  with  God  and  His  peace. 
Your  desire  is  to  know  Jesus,  to  believe  in  Jesus,  to  be  as- 
sured of  your  interest  in  Jesus.  Can  there  he  a  better  way  of 
accomplishing  this  than  bv  going  to  Him  in  all  simplicity,  and 
16  '  ' 


362  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

opening  freely  and  fully  your  whole  heart  to  Him  ?  Put  from 
you  all  cold  formality,  and  deal  with  Christ  as  if  He  were  now 
what  you  read  of  Him  when  upon  earth.  He  is  the  same  that 
He  was  then.  He  was  never  known  to  reject  any  that  came 
to  Him  for  help ;  nor  will  He  turn  Himself  away  from  you. 
Go  to  Him,  and  continue  going  until  you  can  say,  I  have  found 
Him  of  whom  Moses  and  the  jjrophets  did  ivrite.  Oh,  the  joy 
and  hope  that  will  then  spring  up  in  your  heart,  when  thus 
you  have  found  Him  !  He  is  not  far  from  you  now.  In  one 
moment  you  may  make  acquaintance  with  Jesus,  and  a  pre- 
cious Saviour  you  will  find  Him.  And  what  a  mercy  it  will 
be  to  have  such  a  Friend  always  near  yuu,  to  guide,  protect, 
and  bless  you,  and  make  you,  in  return,  a  Messing  to  others ! 
Remember  wresthng  Jacob,  who  said,  I  will  not  let  Thee  go 
until  Thou  bless  me.  This  was  that  same  Jesus  with  whom  the 
patriarch  wrestled,  who  afterwards  was  manifested  in  a  body 
like  ours,  to  pay  to  Divine  justice  our  mighty  debt,  to  suffer  in 
our  stead,  and  who  rose  again  from  the  dead,  appeared  to 
Mary,  and  now  waits  to  be  gracious  unto  you.^' 

"  The  Lord  taketh  pleasure  in  them  that  fear  Him,  in  them 
that  hope  in  His  mercy.  On  opening  my  Bible  this  morning, 
my  eye  rested  upon  these  words,  and  I  thought,  beloved 
friends,  of  you.  I  felt  they  suited  your  state  of  mind.  The 
Lord  your  God,  manifest  in  the  flesh,  taketh  pleasure  in  you. 
Go  alone,  and  thank  Him  for  this  precious  word,  with  a  heart 
fully  open  to  His  view.  Have  no  concealments  from  your 
best  Friend.  He  loves  an  open,  candid  heart.  He  wants  you 
to  approach  Him  with  your  low  frames,  with  your  bad  feelings, 
with  your  cold  affections,  with  your  wandering  minds,  with 
your  unbelieving  hearts.  He  will  listen  to  your  voice,  and 
regard  your  wants,  and  do  all  that  you  can  possibly  think  of, 
and  more  than  your  highest  thought  or  imagination  can  con- 
ceive. The  Lord  is  nigh  unto  all  them  that  call  upon  Him, 
unto  all  that  call  upon  Him  in  truth.  You  shall  never  seek  His 
face  in  vain.  One  loving  look  from  Christ  will  dissolve  your 
heart  into  love  and  sweet  contrition.  His  invitation  is.  Look 
unto  Me,  all  ye  ends  of  the  earth,  and  he  ye  saved.  And  when  the 
Holy  Ghost  shall  take  of  the  things  of  Christ  and  show  them 
unto  you,  you  will  then  say,  '  Not  half  has  been  told  me ;  now 
we  know  Him,  not  because  you  have  told  us,  but  because  He 
has  made  Himself  known  to  us.'  I  long  to  see  you  rejoicing 
in  Christ,  as  if  you  were  a  part  of  myself     I  hope  to  welcome 


LETTERS   TO   H.    AND    E.  S .  363 

you  in  heaven.  Think  of  'the  meeting  there !  Who  would 
not  strive  for  it  ?  Tarry  not,  nor  stop,  until  you  are  quite  sure 
that  you  are  saved." 

"  It  seems  to  me  that  the  chief  concern  of  life  is  to  get  to 
heaven.  This,  the  grand  object  of  our  brief  sojourn  in  this 
vale  of  tears,  should  engross  our  every  thought,  and  enlist 
our  utmost  aim.  Is  not  everything  else  that  would  allure  us 
from  this  great  concern  a  device  of  the  enemy,  plying  his  ef- 
forts and  powers  to  divert  us  from  our  eternal  interests  ?  My 
beloved  friends,  keep  your  eyes  open  to  the  ten  thousand 
temptations  of  the  enemy  of  souls,  and  cultivate  a  readiness  to 
obey  the  summons,  which  at  any  moment  may  come.  Prepare 
to  meet  thy  God.  The  subject  upon  which  I  write  is  of  the  first 
moment.  How  stands  the  matter  between  God  and  your 
souls?  Have  you  the  sealing  of  the  Holy  Ghost?  Has  Jesus 
manifested  Himself  to  you  ?  Press  the  question  upon  your 
consciences,  and,  oh,  may  the  answer  be  an  honest  one  !  A 
heaven,  with  all  its  glory,  or  a  hell,  with  all  its  horrors,  is  de- 
pendent upon  your  present  decision.  A  soul  saved,  or  a  soul 
lost !  A  soul  eternally  happy,  or  a  soul  eternally  wretched ! 
But  Jesus  stands  ready  to  receive  to  his  loving  bosom  every 
poor  sinner  that  comes  to  Him,  in  all  his  helplessness,  for  salva- 
tion.    May  this  be  your  happy  case  ! " 

"I  wish,  my  beloved  friends,  to  quote  a  passage  from  God's 
word,  for  your  comfort,  which  arrested  my  attention  in  the 
course  of  my  reading,  and  my  thoughts  wandered  to  you  in  a 
moment ;  and  may  the  Lord  Jesus  make  it  a  quickening,  com- 
forting, refreshing  portion  to  your  precious  souls.  /  know  the 
thoughts  that  I  think  towards  you^  saith  the  Lord,  thoughts  of 
peace  and  not  of  evil,  to  give  you  an  expected  end.  Then  shall 
ye  call  upon  Me,  and  ye  shall  go  and  pray  unto  Me,  and  I  will 
HEARKEN  unto  you.  And  ye  shall  seek  Me,  and  find  Me,  ivhen 
ye  search  for  Me  ivith  all  your  heart.  Jer.  xxix.  11.  Is  not 
this  worth  wrestling  for  ?  Can  you  go  a  day  or  an  hour  with- 
out receiving  it?  Seek  earnestly,  then,  until  you  find  the 
Lord,  and  He  says  to  you,  lam  thy  salvation.  The  blessing  is 
ivithout  money  and  without  price.  My  soul  travails  in  birth  for 
you,  until  Christ  is  formed  within  you,  the  hope  of  glory. 
There  is  nothing  in  this  poor,  passing  world  that  is  to  you,  at 
this  present  moment,  of  such  vast  consequence.  Dear,  very 
dear  are  you  to  me,  and  I  do  feel  that  you  are  dear  to  the 
heart  of  Jesus.     You  have  my  fervent,  earnest  prayers :  and 


364  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

how  will  it  gladden  my  heart  to  see  you  rejoicing  in  Christ 
Jesus;  and  when  you  do,  come  and  tell  me,  that  we  may 
rejoice  together," 

" .  .  .  Many  thanks,  dear,  loved  friends,  for  the  flowers, 
and  also  for  the  lights.  I  had  some,  but  yours  eclipse  them 
entirely,  and  burn  beautifully  at  night,  when  mine  are  quenched 
in  darkness.  Oh,  that  your  spiritual  light^  and  mine  too,  may 
shine  brighter  and  brighter  unto  the  perfect  day!  How 
brightly  will  that  light  shine,  when  once  introduced  into  the 
glories  of  the  upper  world.  No  night  there,  for  Jesus  will  be 
the  light  and  glory  thereof.  Beloved  friends,  press  onward  to 
know  more  of  this  most  precious  Friend.  I  am  very  feeble ; 
pray  for  me." 

In  the  following  extracts  we  trace  the  application  of  divine 
truth  to  a  more  mature  stage  of  Christian  experience : — 

TO    MRS.  H . 


" Yesterday    we    had    a    day  full  of  Christ — His 

death  and  glorious  resurrection.  The  Fast-day  was  a  day  of 
feasting  w4th  our  souls.  The  word  was  full  of  manna  and  fat- 
ness ;  from  seven  o'clock  in  the  morning  until  half-past  nine  in 
the  evening,  w^e  were  more  or  less  in  the  sanctuary,  humbling 
ourselves  at  the  feet  of  Jesus  for  the  sins  of  the  nation,  and  for 

our  own.     The  Lord    was    most    blessedly  with .     The 

word  came  with  power,  and  accompanied  with  the  unction  of 
the  Spirit.  It  was  a  day  long  to  be  remembered  by  us.  Dear 
friend,  what  could  we  do  without  the  Gospel  ?  It  is  bread  to 
the  soul,  the  living  soul, — for  a  dead  soul  does  not  value  it; 
but  we  need  it,  that  we  may  grow  in  grace  and  in  the  know- 
ledge of  Jesus  Christ,  who  is  its  sum  and  substance.  "We 
must  feed  upon  him. 

'  None  but  Jesus  can  do  helpless  sinners  good.' 

" .  .  .  .  How  important  it  is  that  we  should  be  quite  sure 
that  we  are  on  the  right  foundation.  Is  there,  or  can  there  be, 
anything  of  equal  importance  to  this  ?  And  yet,  how  many 
are  wasting  their  precious  time  on  the  things  of  this  poor 
world  they  are  so  soon  to  leave,  and  are  risking  the  never 
dying  soul,  yet  hastening  on  to  the  bar  of  God,  unprepared  for 
that  great  day  for  which  all  other  days  were  made !  Is  not 
this  madness  ?  May  the  Lord  make  us  faithful  to  them  and 
to  others,  urging  all  we  love  to  flee  from  the  wrath   to  come, 


LETTER   TO    MRS.  W .  365 

pointing  them  to  the  Lamb  of  God,  whose  Oiood,  while  it 
cleanses  us  from  all  sin,  sanctifies  the  heart.  We  often  shrink 
from  this  duty,  and  Satan  endeavours  to  hinder  us  ;  but  Jesus 
requires  it  at  our  hands,  and  by  coming  to  Him,  and  telling 
Him  our  weakness,  He  will  strengthen  us,  and  help  us  to  do 
His  will.  The  text  yesterday  was,  Who  shall  roll  us  away 
the  stone  from  the  door  of  the  sepulchre  f  And  when  they 
looked,  they  saw  that  the  stone  was  rolled  aivay,  for  it  was  very 
great.  How  often  we  have  our  stones  of  diflBculty  lying  in  our 
path ;  and  as  often,  when  we  come  to  the  difficulty,  we  find 
that  the  stone  has  been  rolled  away  by  a  hand  invisible  to 
mortal  eye.     But  the  saint  of  God  knows  whose  it  is." 


TO    MRS.    w- 


"  I  was  just  thinking  of  Jesus,  our  dearest,  best,  and  never- 
failing  Friend,  and  I  thought  I  should  like  to  talk  to  you  about 
Him.  It  is  so  sweet  to  talk  of  one  dear  to  us  who  is  absent. 
Bless  God  with  me,  that  we  are  both  so  near  our  home,  each 
day's  travel  bringing  us  nearer  and  nearer.  Our  eyes  shall 
behold  Him  whom  our  souls  love  beyond  all  created  good. 
What  a  prospect  is  before  us !  For  ever  with  the  Lord  !  Oh, 
for  stronger  faith,  to  give  full  credit  to  all  we  profess  to  believe  ! 
You  will  recollect  I  told  you,  I  have  more  communion  with 
the  saints  above  than  with  the  saints  below.  Many  whom  I 
meet  seem  to  have  so  little  to  do  with  Him,  and  their  acquaint- 
ance with  Him  is  so  slight.  Precious  Jesus  !  who  would  not 
know  Thee?  and  in  knowing  Thee,  who  would  not  love  Thee? 
I  long  to  see  Him,  to  tell  Him  how  much  I  love  Him,  Is  He 
not  all  in  all  to  us  ?  Are  we  not  His,  and  is  He  not  ours? 
Does  He  not  sit  enthroned  upon  our  heart's  best  affections. 
Do  we  not  commune  with  Him  as  a  Friend  to  whom  we  can 
open  our  entire  heart,  tell  Him  all,  and  Hsten  to  his  gracious 
response  ?  Oh,  how  precious  this  intercourse  with  One  we 
love,  and  who  loves  us !  My  thoughts  are,  more  or  less,  iu 
heaven.  There  is  Jesus  ;  the  same  gentleness,  sympathy,  and 
goodness,  portrayed  on  His  blessed  countenance,  every  feature 
beaming  with  love,  as  w4ien  on  earth.  Oh,  beloved,  let  us  join 
to  praise  Him !  Help  me  to  love  Him  better.  We  should  bo 
helpers  of  each  other's  joy.  Our  journey  is  drawing  to  an  end. 
Look  forward,  look  upward.  Jesu's  eye  is  upon  you;  His 
heart  is  towards  you.  A  few  more  severe  trials,  a  few  more 
staggering  steps — and  we  are  there  /" 


MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    M  i.RY   WINSLOW. 


TO    HER    SON,   RET.  G r. W . 

" ....  I  was  grieved  to  hear was  of  a  sceptical  turn. 

Oh,  what  a  mercy  to  have  godly  parents  !  and  how  much  have 
they  to  answer  for,  who  have  brought  up  their  children  to  rest 
their  happiness  only  on  a  world  that  is  passing  away,  and  is 
bearing  them  on  to  another.  Godly  parents  cannot  convert 
their  children ;  God  alone  can  do  this.  But  they  can  lead 
them  to  Jesus,  and  bring  them  up  in  the  fear  of  the  Lord  ;  and 
when  they  have  done  this,  they  have  done  all  they  can  do ; 
for  the  Holy  Ghost  alone  can  change  the  heart,  and  this  is 
what  we  have  to  pray  for,  until  we  see  them  safe  within  the 
ark.  Every  moment  they  are  without  it,  is  replete  with 
danger.  They  must  be  born  again.  Christ  has  said  it.  It 
is  not  a  change  of  sentiment,  nor  an  outward  reformation  of  life  ; 
it  is  a  new  heart  imparted  by  the  Holy  Ghost;  and  when  they 
have  it,  they  will  know  it.  May  we,  who  do  know  our  sins 
are  pardoned,  be  fully  sanctified,  body,  soul,  and  spirit  for  the 
Lord.  We  want  more  devotedness  of  heart,  more  of  the 
single  eye  to  His  glory,  and  to  feel  more  the  value  of  precious 
souls.  Oh,  think  of  lost  souls — of  the  eternal  woe,  where  the 
worm  dieth  not,  and  the  fire  is  not  quenched !  Do  we  believe 
God  ?  And  has  He  not  said  this  ?  Let  us,  then,  put  far  from 
us  all  the  false  charity  that  leaves  sinners  to  stand  upon 
the  precipice,  because  we  will  not  disturb  their  carnal 
security." 

TO    HER    SON    0 . 

" I   have  been  feeble ;  but  this  I  must    expect, 

according  to  the  course  of  things  in  this  changing,  fading  world. 
And  when  I  look  back  upon,  and  think  of  all  that  I  have 
passed  through,  I  have  cause  to  bless  and  praise  the  Lord, 
that  I  am  as  well  as  I  am.     I  was  glad  to  hear  of  the  arrival 

of  Captain  B 's  vessel  in  Australia.     I  have  felt  anxious 

for  their  safety,  and  have  seldom  forgotten  them  in  my  prayers. 
Would  they  all  knew  the  value  of  prayer!  Oh,  to  live  upon 
Jesus — to  live  for  Him — and  in  a  measure,  even  now,  to  live 
with  Him!  But  I  must  not  write  you  a  long  letter,  for  I  know 
you  have  but  little  time  to  read  it.  I  bless  the  Lord  you  were 
carried  comfortably  through  your  labours  yesterday.  It  is  a 
mercy  to  have  the  Lord's  blessing,  even  in  a  small  way ;  to  be 
quite  assured  that  His  presence  is  with  us,  though  all  the 
world  should  be  against  us.     It  is  a  narrow  road  the  followers 


LETTERS   TO    HER   SOX.  367 

of  Christ  walk ;  but  it  is  the  foothpath  He  Himself  travelled, 
and  it  is  a  great  honour  put  upon  a  follower  of  Him,  to  tread 
in  the  same.  In  all  my  helplessness,  I  lean  upon  Him.  I 
must  not  detain  you,  though  my  heart  is  full." 

"  E has  been  unwell.      What    frail    bodies    we    carry 

about  with  us  for  a  season  !  and  bless  God,  it  is  but  for  a 
season,  and  a  short  one,  when,  if  in  Christ,  all  will  be,  must  be, 

well  in  the  end I  constantly  repair  to  my  stronghold 

on  your  behalf.  There  is  none  like  Jesus,  the  once  despised 
Nazarene,  who  trod  this  earth  in  loneliness  and  poverty, 
despised  and  rejected  of  men.  Oh,  to  walk  as  He  walked, 
waiting,  as  He  patiently  waited,  for  the  crown  of  glory  pre- 
pared for  all  who  follow  in  His  blessed  footsteps !  The 
honours  of  this  poor  world  are  not  worth  a  thought.  May  the 
Lord  keep  you  more  than  merely  satisfied ;  may  you  always 
rejoice  that  He  has  called  you  to  take  up  a  cross  for  Him  who 
bore  so  heavy  a  one  for  you,  tliat  you  may  hereafter,  in  a  little 
while  wear  a  crown.  I  am  increasingly  feeble.  Old  age  is 
infancy  again.  Who  would  live  alway  ?  Oh,  for  the  eye  of 
faith  to  look  within  the  vail,  and  see  Jesus  there,  in  full 
possession  of  His  kingdom,  waiting  to  welcome  every  weary 
pilgrim  home  with,  Come,  ye  blessed  of  my  Father  !  Humanly 
speaking,  I  think  this  will  be  my  last  summer  on  earth.  Well, 
be  it  so ;  the  Lord  knows  the  best  time,  and  He  will  take  care 
of  His  own.  Do  not  let  '  Octavius,  jun.,'  forget  grand- 
mamma." 

Soon  after  the  letters  were  penned  from  which  the  above 
extracts  are  made,  and  while  still  on  a  visit  to  her  son  in  town, 
she  was  seized  with  an  illness  which  filled  her  family  with  the 
greatest  alarm.  Her  advanced  age  and  enfeebled  constitution, 
combined  with  the  severitj^  of  the  attack,  left  but  faint  hope  of 
her  rallying.  It  were  needless  to  say,  that  the  most  skilful 
medical  aid  that  London  could  afford  was  obtained,  the  respon- 
sibility being  too  great  for  a  near  relative  to  sustain.  It  was 
an  especial  and  signal  kindness  of  God's  providence,  that  the 
physician  thus  summoned  to  her  couch  should  be  the  late 
Dr.  GoLDiNG  Bird,  of  Russell-square.  Never,  perhaps,  did 
two  individuals  meet  in  the  relation  of  patient  and  physician, 
between  whom,  in  some  of  the  finest  points  of  natural,  as  in 
many  of  the  higher  features  of  Christian  character,  there  ex- 
isted a  closer  resemblance,  or  a  stronger  sympathy.  They 
met, 

6-' 


368  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

"New  as  if  come  from  other  spheres, 
Yet  welcome  as  if  loved  for  years." 

Until  then  they  were  entirely  unknown  to  each  other.  In  a 
short  time,  however,  they  discerned  that  a  powerful  and 
responsive  sympathy  existed  between  them ;  that,  taught  by 
the  same  Spirit,  their  hearts  fashioned  alike  by  the  same 
Divine  hand,  they  were  "  no  more  strangers,  but  fellow-citizens 
with  the  saints,  and  of  the  household  of  God."  The  tender 
interest  with  which  Dr.  Golding  Bird  became  at  once  inspired 
in  his  venerable  patient — the  anxiety,  skill,  and  gentleness, 
with  which  he  watched  her  case — could  not  have  been  sur- 
passed by  the  devotion  of  the  oldest  friend,  or  the  tenderness 
of  the  fondest  son.  It  was  a  touching  spectacle, — and  it  would 
have  formed  a  fine  study  for  the  pencil, — which  met  the  eye 
of  the  writer,  on  his  return  from  Switzerland  (from  whence  he 
had  been  summoned  by  the  illness  of  his  parent,)  when  for  the 
first  time,  he  saw  Dr.  Golding  Bird.  On  entering  the  room, 
Mrs,  Winslow  was  seated  on  a  sofa,  then  convalescent,  her 
beloved  physician  at  her  side.  His  pale,  intellectual  counte- 
nance was  bent  over  her  with  an  expression  of  the  profoundest 
interest  and  veneration,  while  she  was  expatiating  with  her 
wonted  energy  and  earnestness  on  her  favourite  themes — the 
preciousness  of  the  Saviour,  and  the  glorious  hope  of  the 
Christian  beyond  the  tomb.  The  grateful  and  affectionate 
regard  which  the  recovered  patient  cherished  for  the  Christian 
physician — himself  then  battling  Avith  an  insidious  and  rapidly- 
ripening  disease — ^by  whose  skill  and  care,  under  God,  her 
invaluable  life  had  been  reclaimed  as  from  the  grave,  found 
expression  in  the  following  letters  addressed  to  Dr.  Bird : — 

'•39,  Upper  Bedford-place,  Sept.  24,  1853. 

"To  THE  Beloved  Physician. 
"Dear  Brother  in  Jesus, — 

"How  can  I  sufficiently  thank  you  for  all  your 
Christian  kindness,  tenderness,  and  love  to  a  stranger,  to  -whom 
you  came  in  an  hour  of  suffering  ?  I  am  convinced  the  Lord 
sent  you ;  and  may  the  life  He  has  spared  be  increasingly  de- 
voted to  Him,  and  may  the  sweetest,  richest  blessing  rest  upon 
you.  Inasmuch.,  says  our  Lord,  as  ye  have  dons  it  unto  one  of 
the  least  of  these  my  brethren,  ye  have  done  it  unto  Me,  It  is  one 
of  the  strongest  evidences  of  our  adoption,  the  love  which  the 


LETTERS   TO    A    BELOVED    PHYSICLVX.  369 

Spirit  creates,  and  which  cements  and  binds  together  the  one 
family  of  God.  By  this  we  know  our  election  of  God,  and 
that  we  have  passed  from  death  unto  life.  I  am  leaving  town, 
but  could  not  go  without  one  word  to  you,  as  we  may  not  meet 
again  until  we  meet  above.  And  oh,  the  meeting  then! 
What  will  it  be  ?  We  shall  behold  that  same  Jesus  who  trod 
this  lower  world,  now  enthroned  in  glory,  as  full  of  love,  ten- 
derness, and  sympathy  as  ever,  saying  to  us  then — to  you, 
beloved  brother,  and  to  unworthy  me — Enter  into  the  joy  of 
thy  Lord !  Oh,  for  that  blessed  recognition !  May  we  have 
stronger  faith  to  realize  our  high  calling,  and  to  live  in  more 
constant  intercourse  with  Jesus  here,  even  amidst  all  that 
would  fain  turn  us  aside.  It  must  and  it  will  be  a  fight  of 
faith ;  but  if,  in  childlike  simplicity,  we  keep  our  eye  intent 
upon  Jesus,  travelling  to  Him  for  all  we  need,  we  shall  be  able 
to  go  on  our  way  rejoicing.  My  own  dear  brother,  in  the  best 
sense,  I  must  now  bid  you  farewell.  I  am  better  than  I  ever 
expected  to  be  in  this  vale  of  tears.  Heaven  is  my  home,  my 
happy  home.  Where  Jesus  is,  there  you  and  I  must  be. 
Again  let  me  thank  you  for  all  your  kind  attentions ;  and  ever 
believe  me  your  grateful  sister  in  Jesus." 

"January  9th,  1854. 

" .  .  .  It  is  in  my  heart  to  enclose  you  a  little  work, 
which  you  may  read  when  resting  from  your  labours  on  the 
sofa.  To  me  it  has  been  a  rich  repast,  a  sweet  morsel  for  a 
weary,  aged  traveller  through  a  wilderness  world,  which,  take 
it  at  its  best,  is  nothing  else,  and  God  designed  that  it  should 
be  nothing  else.  But  the  prospect  beyond,  oh,  how  glorious ! 
A  Father's  house — a  house  not  made  with  hands,  eternal  in 
the  heavens!  Dear  friend,  the  Lord  sent  you  to  me  at  a  time 
of  suffering.  He  blessed  what  you  did  for  me,  and  I  was 
brought  back  when  I  expected  soon  to  be  with  Him  whom  my 
soul  loveth,  and  have  done  with  sin  and  sorrow  for  ever. 
'Not  yet,'  said  the  Saviour;  'a  little  longer  trial  and  conflict 
in  the  wilderness.'  I  have  something  more  to  learn  of  my 
helplessness  and  weakness.  It  is  but  a  little,  and  we  shall  pass 
away;  all  our  sicknesses,  trials,  and  disappointments,  are  need- 
ful to  fit  us  for  it.  I  have,  through  a  long-protracted  life, 
waded  through  much  tribulation,  and  now  feel  that  I  have  not 
had  one  sorrow  amiss.     The  port  is  almost  in  view,  and  how 


STO  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY  WINSLOW. 

pleasant  it  looks !       Let  me    send  my  Christian  love  to  your 
dear  wife,  and  believe  me  most  gratefully  yours  in  Jesus." 

"April  18th,  1854. 

" .  .  .  And  now  we  are  both  nearing  day  by  day,  hour 
by  hour,  our  glorious  inheritance.  It  is  all  ready  for  us,  and 
Jesus,  whom  we  both  love,  because  He  first  loved  us,  stands 
prepared  to  bid  us  welcome.  Fear  not,  dear  brother;  you 
have  a  right  to  the  inheritance;  it  was  purchased  for  you,  and 
the  full  price  paid  down,  before  you  had  existence,  save  in  the 
foreknowledge  of  God.  I  shall  meet  you  there,  and  recognize 
you  too.  There  will  be  a  perfection  of  knowledge,  as  of  every- 
thing else.  We  have  been  for  years  pressing  on  through  a 
wilderness,  and  now,  through  the  weakness  of  our  faith,  we 
are  loth  to  leave  it.  But  be  of  good  cheer,  for  it  is  all  true, 
all  real.  Our  best  Friend,  He  who  loved  us  unto  the  death, 
is  there,  and  at  times  so  very  near  does  it  seem  to  me,  I  can 
hardly  contain  the  joy  that  fills  my  whole  soul.  Truly,  it  has 
not  entered  into  the  heart  of  man  to  conceive  the  things  that 
God  has  prepared  for  them  that  love  Him.  Sometimes  He 
draws  the  curtain  back  a  little,  and  gives  me  a  glimpse,  and 
then,  overpowered  with  the  sight,  I  can  but  weep  for  joy, — 
yes,  and  weep  for  sin  too.  Oh,  the  wondrous  love  of  God  in 
the  gift  of  His  beloved  Son,  to  suffer,  bleed,  and  die  for  such 
poor,  wretched  sinners !  Only  believe.  I  have  had  such  a 
view  this  morning  of  the  glory  that  awaits  the  believer,  that 
I  could  not  bear  much  more.  I  write  now  to  encourage  you 
in  the  conflict.  I  may  be  there  to  bid  you  welcome.  Who 
can  tell  ?  The  Lord  sent  you  to  my  bedside,  as  His  messenger, 
to  bring  me  back  again  to  earth,  to  see  the  conversion  of 
several  of  my  grandchildren,  in  answer  to  my  many  prayers, 
and  also  to  witness,  even  in  this  poor  world  of  sorrow,  some 
glimpses  of  the  glory  that  awaits  the  believer.  When  Stephen 
was  dying,  the  curtain  of  heaven  was  drawn,  and  he  saw 
Jesus  standing  ready  to  receive  him.  He  is  the  very  same 
now, — the  same  yesterday^  to-day,  and  for  ever.  I  will  not,  dear 
friend,  trouble  you  longer,  but  will  ask  the  Lord  to  bless 
you,  to  encourage  your  heart,  to  comfort  your  dear  wife,  and 
to  prepare  all  you  love  to  follow  you  into  the  land  of  glory. 
Oh,  to  spend  eternity  together  with  all  we  have  loved  on  earth ! 
That  glory  shall  be  increasing  through  the  countless  ages  of  an 
endless  existence." 


LETTERS   TO   A    BELOVED    PHYSICIAN.  371 

The  warm  response  which  these  utterances  awoke,  was 
worthy  of  him  on  whose  Christian  heart  they  fell  Hke  the  soft 
breath  of  evening  on  the  sweet  ^olian.  The  finest  chords  of 
his  gentle  nature  were  touched,  and  trembled  with  holy  ecstasy.* 
A  brief  note,  penned  from  his  couch  of  languor,  survives  to 
complete  and  close  the  record  of  a  friendship  too  sacred  and 
too  brief  for  earth: — 

"48,  Russell-square,  Feb.  3rd,  1854. 

"  I  must,  my  dear  Mrs.  Winslow,  write  a  few  lines  to  you, 
to  thank  you  gratefully  for  your  last  kind  letter.  I  cherish  all 
your  letters,  but  the  last  was  very  genial  and  comforting  to  me. 
It  came  just  as  I  began  to  feel  again  the  pressure  of  the  burden 
of  my  work  on  my  feeble  frame ;  and  although  I  have  not  been 
quite  laid  aside,  I  have  been  obliged  to  limit  myself  to  my 
home  practice,  so  as  to  rest  for  the  other  part  of  the  day.  It 
was  comforting  to  be  reminded  by  you,  who  had  so  long  tasted 
that  the  Lord  is  gracious,  that  we  should  go  to  Him  even  with 
our  small  cares,  as  without  Him  we  could  do  nothing.  I  fear 
I  have  too  much  reason  often  to  say,  with  the  trembling  sup- 
pliant of  old,  '  Lord,  I  believe  ;  help  Thou  my  unbelief  T  My 
dear  wife,  who  deeply  enjoyed  your  letter — for  we  regard  it 
as  common  property — desires  to  unite  Avith  me  in  earnest 
prayers  for  your  preservation  during  the  perils  of  the  winter, 
and  that  you  may  yet  long  be  spared  as  an  example  of  one 
who  in  this  world  is  enabled,  by  grace,  to  live  in  the  land  of 
Beulah. 

"Do  give  my  affectionate  regards  to  Miss  W ,  and  your 

dear  son  O ,  and 

"BeHeve  me  to  remain,  ever  your  friend, 

"GoLDiNG  Bird." 

"  To  Mrs.  Winslow." 

"I  shall  never  forget,"  adds  one  who  survives  to  mourn,  as 
none  others  can,  his  irreparable  loss — "  I  shall  never  forget  his 
reading  the  last  letter  sent.  Tears  of  joy  fell  from  his  eyes  at 
the  sweet  mention  of  that  dear  Saviour  whom  he  so  loved. 
His  love  for  your  dear  parent  amounted  to  a  kind  of  reverence." 
Religion  mourned  the  loss  of  one  of  her  brightest  ornaments, 

*  **  His  fine  toaed  heart,  like  the  harp  of  the  winds, 
Answers  in  sweetness  each  breeze  that  sings ; 
And  the  storms  of  grief,  and  the  breath  of  joy, 
Draw  nothing  but  music  from  its  strings." 


372  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

and  science  one  of  her  noblest  sons,  when  Dr.  Golding  Bird 
was  numbered  with  the  dead.  Seldom  have  more  brilliant 
powers  or  brighter  hopes  become  suddenly  quenched  in  the 
darkness  of  the  sepulchre,  than  when  this  accomplished  scholar 
and  eminent  physician  succumbed  to  the  power  of  a  disease 
accelerated,  if  not  caused,  by  his  extreme  devotion  to  his  pro- 
fession, on  the  loftiest  summit  of  which  he  stood  when  death's 
dart  laid  him  low.  But  distinguished  as  were  his  talents,  and 
successful  as  was  his  career,  the  highest  encomium  of  Dr. 
Golding  Bird  is, — that  he  was  a  believer  in  the  Lord  Jesus 
Christ.  Nature  made  him  great.  Providence  made  him  useful, 
religion  made  him  good ;  and  nature.  Providence,  and  grace, 
unite  to  accomplish  the  purposes  of  Him  "  who  is  wonderful  in 
counsel,  and  excellent  in  working."  The  grace  of  God  was 
"exceeding  abundant"  in  him.  He  was  not  "ashamed  of 
Christ  and  of  His  words,"  but  everywhere,  and  on  all  oc- 
casions,— whether  lecturing  from  the  chair  of  the  professor,  or 
administering  in  the  sick  room  of  the  patient, — he  invariably 
exhibited  the  character,  maintained  the  dignity,  and  exerted 
the  influence,  of  the — Christian  Physician.* 

It  was  soon  after  her  recovery  from  the-  illness  just  referred 

*  "  On  one  point,''  remarks  the  elegant  pen  of  his  biographer,  "  he 
entertained  a  strong  opinion,  regarding  it  an  unpardonable  fault,  to 
delude  the  dying  patient  with  false  hopes,  when  all  earthly  means  of 
relief  had  failed,  and  death  remained  inevitable.  Whilst  rational  hope 
existed,  he  encouraged  it ;  but  when  it  was  shut  out  for  ever,  he  always 
told  the  truth.  He  spoke  emphatically  on  this  subject  some  j^ears  ago, 
when  called  by  a  late  eminent  member  of  his  profession  to  the  bedside 
of  a  dying  physician.  He  was  assured  that  their  suffering  brother  did 
not  know  his  danger,  and  had  not  been  told  of  it.  '  Then  be  it  my  task,' 
was  the  reply,  '  to  tell  him.  If  we  cannot  preserve  his  life  here,  we 
must  not  let  him  hazard  life  hereafter.'  .  .  He  had  always  pursued  his 
profession  under  the  conviction  that  the  spiritual  and  practical  physician 
was  inseparable  :  that  between  tliem  a  kindred  tie  existed,  a  union  often 
to  be  usefully  emploj'ed,  and  which  it  was  an  important  duty  to  preserve 
and  strengthen.  By  him  it  was  never  broken.  At  the  risk  of  being 
deemed  sometimes  intrusive,  he  never  failed,  when  he  felt  that  it  was 
necessary,  to  direct  the  attention  of  the  dying  to  that  reliance  on  the 
Divine  sacrifice  which,  when  liis  own  voice  was  hushed  in  the  silence  of 
death,  and  his  worn-out  and  suffering  body  was  at  rest,  graced  his  thin 
features  with  a  smile  of  tranquillity  and  peace.^'- -Biographical  Notice 
of  the  late  Dr.  Golding  Bird,  A.M.,  M  D..  F.R.S..  F.L.S. 

While  thus  touching  upon  the  union  of  the  medical  profession  with 
Christianity — the  connexion  of  science  with  religion— as  illustrated  by 
the  life  of  Dr.  Golding  Bird,  it  may  not  be  inappropri  ite  to  quote  some 
observations,  yet  further  and  more  ably  elucidating  this  important  and 


LETTERS    ON   HER   RECOVERY.  373 

to,  that  the  following  letters  were  penned,  the  elevated, 
heavenly  tone  of  which  would  alone  indicate  that  she  had 
been  so  near  to  her  eternal  home  as  to  have  gazed  within  the 

interesting  question,  by  Dr.  Forbes  Wixslow.  the  youngest  son  of  the 
subject  of  this  Memoir.  The  extract  is  taken  from  a  volume,  entitled 
'•  Lettsomian  Lectures  on  Insanity,  by  Porbes  Winslow,  M.D.,  D.C.L., 
1856." 

When  speaking  of  the  psychological  vocation  of  the  physician.  Dr. 
Forbes  Winslow  observes: — "I  claim  for  the  cultivators  of  medical 
science  higher  and  more  e.xalted  functions  than  those  usually  assigned 
to  the  physician.  We  form  but  a  low  and  grovelling  estimate  of  the 
high  destination,  and  of  the  solemn  duties  of  our  dignified  vocation,  if 
we  conceive,  that  the  operations  of  the  physician  are  limited  to  the 
successful  application  of  mere  physical  agents.  The  physician  is  daily 
called  to  witness  the  powerful  eflect  of  mental  influences  and  moral 
emotions  upon  the  material  organization.  He  perceives  that  such  causes 
engender  disease,  destroy  life,  retard  recovery,  and  often  interfere  with 
the  successful  nctioni  of  the  most  potent  remedial  means  exhibited  for  the 
alleviation  and  cure  of  bodily  disease  and  suffering.  Although  such  in- 
fluences are  admitted  to  play  an  important  part,  either  for  good  or  evil, 
T  do  not  conceive  that  the  practitioners  of  medicine  have  had  a  sufficient 
appreciation  of  their  great  importance.  The  physician  is  often  called 
upon,  in  the  exercise  of  his  responsible  duties,  to  discharge  medico- 
theological  functions.  It  is  occasionally  his  painful  duty  to  sit  by  the 
couch  of  the  dying,  and  witness  the  last  sad  conflict  between  mind  and 
matter.  It  is  on  such  occasions  that  he  lias,  either  in  co-operation  with 
the  recognised  minister,  or  in  his  temporary  absence,  an  opportunity  of 
whispering  words  of  comfort,  hope  and  consolation  to  the  wounded  spirit, 
and  of  directing  the  attention  of  the  patient,  and  those  immediately  about 
him.  to  the  only  true  and  legitimate  .source  of  the  Christian's  hope.  Let 
the  physician  not  lightly  esteem  or  neglect  the  solemn  functions  thus 
imposed  upon  him. 

"  Our  position  as  medical  philosophers,  occupied  in  the  investigation 
of  the  phenomena  of  life,  of  mind,  and  of  disease,  entails  upon  us  anxious, 
solemn,  and  responsible  duties.  In  the  hour  of  pain,  wh.en  the  spirit  is 
humbled  by  suftering— in  the  day  of  distress  -in  the  solemn  moment  of 
dissolution  —it  is  our  high  and  noble  privilege,  like  guardian  ang'els,  to 
hover  about  the  couch  of  the  sick  and  dying.  We  enter  the  chamber  of 
the  man  writhing  v/ith  agony,  bereft,  perhaps,  of  that  which  alone  made 
existence  plea-curable,  the  right  exercise  of  tlie  mental  powers,  and 
loud  and  aftcctionate  demands  are  made  upon  our  sagacity  and  skill. 
Life -the  silken  thread,— the  fragile  chord  of  life— depends  upon  our 
rapid  appreciation  of  the  phenomena  of  disease,  and  read}^  administration 
of  remedial  agents  for  their  relief  and  cure.  Our  profession  is  a  noble 
one  — a  most  dignified,  exalted,  and  honourable  calling  While  feeling 
that  the  best  of  our  works  are  imperfect,  and  tliat  we  must  rely  for  our 
future  happiness  upon  the  mercy  of  God,  in  Christ  Jesus,  and  not  upon 
our  own  merits.  I  cannot  be  forgetful  how  great  is  our  responsibility, 
for  the  rig4it  use  of  our  talents,  and  the  faithful  discharge  of  our  solemn 
and  anxious  duties." 


374  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

vail,    and   to    have    felt  and  heard  what  it  was  not  possible 
fully  tc  utter. 


TO    MRS.    c- 


"  My  DEAR  Friend, —  Nov.  25th,  1853. 

"  I  have  often  thought  of  you,  and  have  inquired  of 
those  who  knew,  how  you  were.  But  when  we  get  above, 
we  shall  not  have  far  to  seek  each  other.  Oh,  that^  not  this,  is 
our  home !  Here  all  is  tainted,  defiled  with  sin ;  God  has 
something  better  in  store  for  us.  Make  your  calling  and  elec- 
tion sure  for  that  better  land.  I  go  to  prepare  a  place  for  you. 
I  have  lately  been  brought  by  severe  illness  almost  in  view  of 
my  glorious  inheritance.  My  children  were  weeping  around 
me,  and  all  thought  my  time  was  come,  I  felt  quite  ready. 
In  a  few  moments  I  expected  to  be  in  the  presence  of  Him 
my  soul  loved.  But  it  was  not  to  be  so ;  and  here  I  am  still 
in  this  vale  of  tears,  kept  for  a  season  out  of  my  eternal  in- 
heritance, and,  for  some  wise  and  gracious  purpose,  have  been 
wonderfully  raised  up  again.  The  will  of  the  Lord  be  done. 
And  now,  my  dear  friend,  I  feel  I  must  live  more  than  ever 
upon  Jesus.  He  is  alone  able  to  counsel,  direct,  and  overrule 
all  our  concerns,  and  in  the  best  possible  way.  Why,  then, 
should  you  and  I  be  over  anxious  about  any  one  thing,  when 
w^e  can  cast  all  our  cares  upon  Him  ?  Oh,  it  is  sweet  living 
when  we  thus  live  upon  Jesus !  Go  often  and  talk  with 
Christ,  and  tell  Him  all  you  feel  and  desire.  The  smaller  the 
case  you  take  to  Him,  the  more  3^ou  honour  Him !  for  in  this 
act  you  acknowledge  your  belief  in  what  He  says  that.  Without 

me  ye  can  do  nothing.     I  am  with ,  and  greatly  enjoy  his 

ministry.  When  he  was  an  infant  I  fed  him,  and  now  in  my 
old  age  he  is  permitted  to  feed  me  with  the  sincere  milk  of  the 
word,  which  is  very  sweet  and  refreshing  to  my  waiting  soul. 
The  Lord  Jesus  draw  you  nearer  and  yet  nearer  to  Himself, 
and  make  Himself  more  sensibly  known  to  you.  Do  not  lose 
siglit  of  Him  ;  He  is  your  Helper  in  this  vale  of  tears,  and  has 
promised  that  He  will  never  leave  nor  forsake  you.  And  oh, 
to  see  Him  in  all  his  glory  above,  and  be  acknowledged  there, 
in  the  midst  of  all  the  host  of  heaven,  as  His  beloved,  this  is 
worth  living  and  is  worth  dying  for  !  In  a  little  moment,  and 
eternity  will  burst  upon  our  view.  Lean  upon  Jesus  for  every- 
thing, and  you  will  find  you  cannot  do  without  Him  here  or 
hereafter." 


LETTERS   OX   HER   RECOVERY.  375 


TO    MRS.    C. . 

"...  Since  I  last  heard  from  you,  I  have  been  brought 
almost  in  full  view  of  my  eternal  home.     My  physician  gave 

me  up,  and  my  children,  who  were  all  about  me  but  dearO , 

who  was  abroad  for  his  health,  were  expecting  my  departure. 
But  the  Lord  said,  '  Not  yet ; '  and  so  I  was  raised  up,  and 
brought  back  to  suffer  a  little  more  of  earth's  trials.  I  felt 
peaceful  and  satisfied  that  I  was  safe.  There  was  not  that  re- 
joicing that  I  sometimes  have  had,  but  a  calm,  trusting,  con- 
fiding state  of  mind ;  not  the  shadow  of  a  doubt,  nor  a  cloud 
between  my  soul  and  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth.  Oh,  dear 
friend,  let  us  often  meditate  on  heaven  ;  it  will  assist  us  to  bear 
more  serenely  the  ills  of  life.  Our  Jesus  is  there,  the  self-same 
Jesus  who  dwelt  in  the  flesh.  Was  it  not  sweet  and  lovely  in 
Him  to  lead  His  disciples  out  to  the  spot  from  whence  he  as- 
cended to  glory,  in  order  that  they  might  see  that  the  identically 
same  body  He  had  borne  about  with  Him  on  earth.  He  bore 
up  with  Him  to  heaven  ?  I  am  quite  sure  that  if  we  dwelt 
more  in  all  godly  simplicity  in  the  full  expectation  of  seeing 
and  being  with  Jesus  for  ever,  we  should  be  found  oftener  re- 
joicing in  the  prospect  before  us.  Have,  my  dear  friend, 
constant  transactions  with  this  precious  Saviour.  A  holy 
famiharity  with  Him  will  tend  much  to  conform  us  to  His 
likeness.  But  few  go  to  Jesus  just  as  they  are,  and  with  no  price 
in  their  hand.  A  poor,  needy  sinner,  empty  and  helpless  as  a 
babe,  is  inconceivably  welcome  to  Christ.  From  such  He  will 
never,  no  never,  turn  away.  This  simple,  believing  living  upon 
Christ  has  a  most  sanctifying,  purifying  tendency  upon  the 
whole  inner  man ;  and  thus  sin  grows  more  hateful,  and  the 
world  less  attractive,  and  the  pleasures  of  sense  increasingly 
distasteful,  and  we  are  better  fitted  to  sustain  the  trials  of  life. 
I  must  now  conclude,  but  my  heart  is  so  full  of  this  glorious 
theme,  that,  were  it  possible,  I  could  proclaim  to  the  whole 
world  the  willingness  there  is  in  the  heart  of  Jesus  to  receive 
and  save  sinners,  as  sinners^  and  not  as  saints.  Let  me  hear 
from  you." 

How  often  in  the  Christian's  deepening  experience  are  old 
and  long-familiar  truths  brought  to  the  soul  with  all  the 
power,  and  clothed  with  all  the  freshness  and  beauty,  of  a 
new  revelation  !  What  an  evidence  this  of  the  divinity  of  the 
Bible,  and  what  a  touching  unfolding  of  the  love  of  the  Spirit ! 


376  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

It  is  thus  she  confirms,  by  her  own  personal  experience,  this 
thought : — 

"  Dearest  0 ,  Sabbath  Afternoon. 

"  I  am  still  confined  to  bed,  quite  unable  to  exert 
myself.  I  have  prayed  for  you  again  and  again,  many  times 
to-day.  Oh,  what  a  mighty  privilege  it  is  to  have  to  do  immed- 
iately with  God,  with  God  Himself,  the  mighty  God  in  Christ ! 
How  could  we  have  known  anything  of  God,  had  He  not 
stooped  to  reveal  Himself  in  Jesus  ?  I  have  been  thinking 
much  to-day  of  this  wondrous  stoop.  It  has  opened  in  my 
mind  a  new  spring  of  thought,  has  given  me  a  fresh  view  of 
God,  to  an  extent  I  have  never  had  before.  For,  although  I 
have  often  read  and  spoken  of  God  reveaHng  Himself  in  my 
nature,  yet  it  has  never  appeared  so  vividly  true,  so  blessedly 
real  as  to-day.  Oh,  as  I  travel  on  to  my  heavenly  home,  and 
near  the  time  when  the  vail  will  be  drawn  altogether,  how 
increasingly  wonderful  are  the  glorious  realities  of  eternity  ! 
wonder  upon  wonder  opening  up  to  the  astonished  sight,  almost 
overwhelming.  Praise  our  God.  What  could  I  do  without 
Jesus  !  Old  age,  with  its  untold  infirmities,  would  be  a  serious 
drag  if  He  were  not  by  me,  and  had  I  not  the  privilege  of 
leaning  upon  Him  with  all  the  weight  of  care,  pain,  sin,  and 
sorrow.  Again  would  I  say,  how  inexpressibly  precious  the 
incarnation  of  the  Son  of  God  has  been  to  my  soul  to-day,  the 
Holy  Ghost  unfolding  it  in  a  new  light,  and  giving  me  to  take 
a  more  simple,  direct  hold  upon  it  as  a  matter-  of-fact  truth !  I 
ask  you  now  to  help  me  to  praise  Him  for  the  depth  of  love, 
matchless,  wondrous  love,  it  has  unfolded  to  me,  and  to  urge 
you  to  preach  more  and  more  of  God,  the  mighty  God,  dwelling 
in  Jesus,  in  a  body  like  our  own.  I  have  been  praying  that 
the  Holy  Ghost  may  help  you  to-day,  and  carry  the  word 
home  to  the  hearts  of  all,  that  many  poor  sinners  may  be 
brought  to  the  feet  of  Jesus.  It  has  not  been  a  barren  Sab- 
bath to  me,  although  I  have  been  kept  at  home.  Oh,  the 
goodness  of  God,  the  wonders  of  His  matchless  love  !  Eternity 
will  be  only  long  enough  to  tell  of  it.     Love  to  all." 

It  was  a  pleasing  interpretation  of  the  design  of  God  in  thus 
turning  her  back  again  into  the  wilderness,  after  giving  her  so 
close  and  vivid  a  view  of  the  good  land,  to  the  borders  of 
which  He  seemed  to  bring  her,  that  she  was  spared  to  behold 
several  of  her  children's  children  avow  her  God  and  Father  to 


LETTERS   TO    HER    GRANDCHILDREN.  877 

be  theirs, — thus  permitted  to  sickle,  ere  she  departed,  a  "kind 
of  first  fruits"  of  the  golden  harvest  of  her  long-sown  prayers. 
We  have  space  but  for  a  few  extracts  only  of  the  many  in- 
structive and  encouraging  letters  her  pen  addressed  to  them  on 
this  occasion,  all  breathing  much  holy  joy  in  their  conversion, 
and  godly  jealousy  for  their  consistent  walk. 


to  her  grandson,  t.  e.  w . 

"Dearest  T , 

"Dearer  to  me  now  than  ever,  since  you  came  into 
this  world  of  trial  and  sorrow.  The  love  of  Jesus  acts  as  a 
holy  cement,  uniting  the  one  family  of  God  to  Himself  and  to 
each  other.  Bless  the  Lord  for  His  great  goodness  and  His 
tender  love  to  you  all,  not  forgetting  the  dear  departed  one, 
the  father  of  you  all.  So  eternal  and  deep,  so  sovereign  and 
boundless  is  the  love  of  God,  angels  cannot  fathom  it.  And  I 
believe  that  a  sigh,  sincere  and  deep,  coming  from  the  chief  of 
sinners,  even  at  a  dying  hour,  the  loving,  sympathising  heart 
of  Jesus  could  not  resist  it.  Oh,  the  wondrous  love  of  God  in 
giving  us  such  a  Saviour,  able  to  save  to  the  uttermost  all  who 
feel  their  need  of  Him !  Now  is  the  Lord  answering  my  ten 
thousand  poor  prayers,  and  these,  I  think,  when  I  was  so  near 
my  happy  home,  almost  in  sight.  He  brought  me  back  to  see. 
Oh,  He  is  a  God  who  loves  to  answer  prayer,  and  is  faithful 
to  His  every  word  !  You  cannot  ask  too  much  of  Him.  The 
more  you  ask,  the  better  is  He  pleased.  Go  with  large  de- 
mands.    Ask  anything  in  My  name^  and  I  will  do  it.     Ask,  that 

your  joy  might  he  full.     We  heard  from  W ,  who  gives  as 

a  reason  for  not  writing  sooner,  that  they  had  set   apart  one 

evening  in  the  week,  H S and  himself,  for  reading 

the  Bible  and  for  prayer.  A  young  man  whom  they  have 
met  in  the  University,  and  who  is  a  dear  Christian,  and  ad- 
vanced in  the  ways  of  God,  has  joined  them,  and  is  a  great 
acquisition.  My  love  to  your  wife.  Oh,  that  we  might  be  a 
whole  family  in  heaven  ! " 


TO    HER    GRAND-DAUGHTER    S- 


"  No  one  can  tell  how  my  soul  rejoiceth  over  you,  my  be- 
loved cliild.  Now  do  I  see  why  the  Lord  brought  me  back 
to  earth ;  it  was  to  cause  me  to  see  the  answer,  before  I  left, 
of  my  poor  prayers.  And  now  I  shall  hope  to  meet  and  dwell 
with  you  throughout  a  blessed  eternity,  and  many  more  so 


378  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW, 

dear  to  us  both.  How  grateful  I  am  to  Him  for  all  His  abun- 
dant goodness  and  tender  mercy  to  us  as  a  family !  God  be 
praised.  My  heart  has  been  melted  in  love  to-day  to  Him, 
who  is  all  over  and  all  within,  nothing  but  love  unfeigned, 
constant,  and  unabating,  to  the  weakest,  the  most  unworthy  of 
all  His  little  flock.  And  now  let  me  urge  you  to  live  upon 
Him  as  a  young  child,  going  to  Him  for  all  you  want  and 
with  all  you  fear.  You  will  find  Him  ready  to  respond  to 
your  request  by  the  still  small  voice  of  His  Spirit.  Hear  me, 
O  Lord,  when  I  cry  luitli  my  voice  :  have  mercy  also  upon  me, 
and  answer  me.  Psalm  xxvii.  7.  Oh,  that  He  may  go  on  in 
His  own  loving  way  until  all  we  love  are  horn  again,  and  set 
out  on  their  heavenly  race  to  the  land  of  glory  ! " 

"  Oh,  how  my  heart  rejoices  over  you,  my  beloved  child, 
doubly  dear  to  me  now !  Oh,  the  mercy  of  mercies,  to  be  be- 
loved of  Christ !  The  Lord  has  at  last  condescended  to  bow 
the  heavens,  and  listen  to  my  ten  thousand  prayers  for  you  all. 
May  the  great  and  mighty  work  go  on  among  the  others  still 
to  be  called  into  the  kingdom !  Oh,  the  wondrous  power  of 
prayer  when  we  come  in  the  name  of  Jesus,  God's  dear  and 
beloved  Son  !  My  heart  is  brimful  of  joy  on  your  account  and 
dear  Octavia's.  I  wish  you  would  both  come  and  see  me. 
The  Lord  has  raised  me  up  from  the  borders  of  the  grave,  to 
see  the  fruit  of  my  prayers.  I  wondered  what  I  was  spared 
for,  but  I  see  it  now.  Keep  an  open  heart  with  Jesus.  Re- 
member He  is  bone  of  your  bone,  and  flesh  of  your  flesh.  He 
can  enter  into  all  your  fears  and  hopes,  desires  and  difficulties. 
Having  once  been  in  the  body.  He  knows  how  to  pity  and  to 
succour  you,  and  to  be  a  present  help  in  time  of  need.  Thank 
dear  E for  her  kind  letter,  giving  me  such  precious  news.'' 

"I  bless  God,  dear  child,  often  on  your  behalf;  but  now 
remember,  you  have  but  just  begun  to  run  the  race — a  race 
for  a  crown  of  glory.  So  run  that  you  may  ohtain.  Many 
I  have  seen  set  out  well  in  this  race,  but  I  have  lived  to  see 
them  fall  short  at  last  of  the  prize.  They  forsook  their  first 
love,  and  sought  their  enjoyment  in  the  poor  wretched  trifles 
of  time  and  sense.  May  it  not  be  so  with  you,  darling  child. 
Keep  close  to  Jesus.  How  do  I  pray  for  you  and  for  dear  Oc- 
tavia  too,  and  for  all  those  who  have  truly  set  out  on  their  heaven- 
ly journey !  You  are  in  a  world  full  of  temptation.  Satan,  the 
foe  of  Christ  and  the  enemy  of  souls,  goeth  about  to  draw 
aM%iy   Christ's  lambs  from  closely  following  their  Shepherd. 


LETTERS    TO    RER    GRANDCHILDREN.  379 

He  has  a  thousand  ways  to  alkire  and  entrap  them  to  do  and 
say  that  which  will  grieve  the  Spirit,  and  dishonour  the  Saviour. 
He  will  say  to  you,  '  This  is  no  sin,  and  that  is  no  sin ;  other 
Christians  do  it,  and  why  may  not  you  ?'  And  what  can  you 
do,  thus  assailed  by  the  arch  enemy?  You  have  no  more 
self-power  to  resist  him  than  an  infant  has  over  an  elephant. 
But  Jesus,  who  loves  you,  and  has  all  power  in  heaven  and  on 
earth,  invites  you  to  come  to  Him,  and  be  saved  from  all  your 
enemies,  from  the  power  of  Satan,  and  from  the  evil  that  is  in 
the  world,  and  from  the  corrupt  tendencies  of  your  own  sinful 
nature.  And  although  you  are  now  saved,  and  your  name  is 
written  in  the  Lamb's  book  of  life,  yet  you  are  still  in  the  body, 
and  have  daily  and  hourly  to  contend  with  the  world,  the 
flesh,  and  Satan.  And  Satan  is  sure  to  find  a  hidden  foe  in 
your  heart,  ready  to  betray  you  into  his  power.  And  what 
can  a  feeble  child  do  in  such  a  case,  but  run  at  once  to  Jesus  ? 
Be  where  you  may,  in  company,  in  the  street,  or  at  home,  lift 
up  your  heart  to  Jesus  for  aid,  and  He  will  prove  a  present 
help  in  your  time  of  need.  He  listens  to  the  feeblest  breath- 
ings of  the  heart.  He  requires  not  the  voice  ;  a  wish,  a  faint 
desire,  will  be  all-sufficient.  Wherever  you  are,  there  is  Jesus. 
And  may  the  Holy  Ghost  w^rite  upon  your  heart  the  precept. 
Grieve  not  the  Holy  Spirit^  ivherehy  you  are  sealed  unto  the  day 
of  redemption.  One  wrong  step  in  the  early  part  of  your 
Christianity  may  lead  to  an  eventual  going  back  far  to  the 
world.  Remember,  you  are  commanded  to  come  out  of  the 
world,  and  to  touch  not  the  unclean  thing.  I  wish  you  to  be 
much  in  the  study  of  the  Bible,  before  you  unite  yourself  with 
any  particular  church.  See  what  your  Lord  says  as  respects 
the  ordinances  of  His  house,  for  it  is  most  important  that  we 
walk  in  the  right  ways  of  the  Lord ;  this  you  can  do,  and  still, 
if  you  prefer  it,  attend  the  ministry  of  Mr.  Jarman." 

"  Go  nowhere  where  you  cannot  take  Christ  with  you. 
Put  your  hand,  as  it  were,  in  His  hand,  and  whatever  you  do, 
let  your  whole  aim  be  to  please  Him,  who  suffered,  bled,  and 
died  that  you  might  live  for  Him,  and  with  Him  for  ever. 
Let  me  hear  often  from  you.     It  is  but  a  little  while  that  I 

shall  be  here.     Pray  for  dear  H and  P .     Encourage 

dear  S and  H in  maintaining  the  worship  of  the  Lord 

in  the  family.  Make  it  a  point  to  take  the  younger  children  in 
to  hear  God's  word  and  to  pray.  May  the  Lord  bless  you,  my 
own  beloved  child,  make  you  useful,  and  keep  you  near  to 


380  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

Himself.  Let  darling  Octavia  read  this ;  it  is  for  you  both. 
Pray,  pray,  pray  without  ceasing.  God  listens  to  your  faintest 
breathing.     Oh,  the  marvellous  potency  of  prayer,  when  we 

plead  the  name  of  Jesus  !     Thank  dear  E for  her  precious 

letter;  but  you  must  not  any  of  you  cross  your  letters,  as  I 
cannot  make  it  all  out,  and  then  I  am  cross  too !" 

A  name  occurs  in  one  of  the  preceding  extracts  which  it 
may  be  proper,  in  this  part  of  the  Memoir,  to  introduce.  It 
was  her  privilege,  during  her  visits  to  town,  and  as  the  close 
of  life  drew  on,  to  wait  occasionally  on  the  ministry  of  the  late 
Rev.  David  Fenton  Jarman,  incumbent  of  Bedford  Episcopal 
Chapel,  Bloomsbury.  It  was  just  the  character  of  ministration 
that  her  soul  needed  to  nourish  and  strengthen  it  for  its  pas- 
sage over  Jordan.  Often  would  she  repair  to  his  sanctuary 
when  scarcely  able  to  walk  from  the  carriage  to  the  pew,  and 
when  more  than  once  compelled  to  retire,  from  faintness,  before 
the  service  closed,  and  as  frequently  has  she  returned  refreshed 
by,  and  rejoicing  in,  the  glorious  truths  that  had  fallen  with  so 
much  power  from  the  lips  of  this  honoured  servant  of  Christ. 
Grateful  for  the  souMielp  thus  derived,  and  sympathizing  with 
the  impaired  health  from  which  he  was  a  constant  sufferer,  she 
would  occasionally  visit  his  apartment  adjoining  the  chapel, 
and  seek  to  cheer  and  strengthen  his  lone  and  depressed  heart. 
But  not  to  her  only  were  the  labours  of  Mr.  Jarman  blest.  It 
pleased  God  to  own  his  ministry,  in  the  conversion  of  several 
members  of  her  family ;  and  this  circumstance  was  well  calcu- 
lated to  deepen  her  affectionate  and  prayerful  interest  in  this 
tried  minister,  and  draw  yet  closer  the  bond  that  linked  in 
holy  fellowship  two  kindred  spirits  destined  so  soon  to  meet 
together  before  the  throne  of  God  and  of  the  Lamb.  We 
venture  upon  a  few  extracts  of  the  correspondence  which 
resulted  from  this  hallow^ed  friendship.  It  is  thus  she  seeks 
to  convey  the  richest  comfort  that  an  earnest,  faithful  minister 
of  Christ  can  possibly  desire  or  receive  : — 

TO    THE    REV.   D.  F.  JARMAN. 

"  My  DEAR  Brother  in  Jesus, —       Leamington,  Dec.  13th. 

"  Youvrill  rejoice,  I  am  sure,  to  hear  that  the  Lord 
has  made  your  ministry  a  blessing  to  several  of  my  very  dear 
grandchildren,  and  thus  has  answered  my  ten  thousand  prayers 
for  them.  They  have  sought  and  found  Christ  precious  to 
their  souls,  and  are  going  on  their  way  rejoicing.     Thus  you 


LETTER   TO   THE    REV.    D.    F.    JARMAN.  381 

see,  beloved  brother,  you  are  not  labouring  in  vain  for  the 
Lord ;  for,  although  these  dear  ones  have  heard  and  known 
the  gospel  as  from  infancy,  yet  the  seed  has  laid  dormant  until 
now,  and  God  has  blessed  your  ministry  to  the  enkindling  of  a 
flame  of  holy  love  to  the  precious  Saviour  of  sinners  in  their 
hearts.  I  could  not  refrain  from  tellmg  you  this.  Since  I  saw 
you  I  have  been  very  near  to  the  kingdom  of  glory,  but  the 
Lord  has  detained  me  here  a  httle  longer.  Yes,  it  is  but  a 
little  while,  and  we  pass  away  to  better  things  prepared  for 
us,  and  then  you  will  hear  the  words.  Well  done^  good  and 
faithful  servant ;  enter  into  the  joy  of  your  Lord.  God  be 
praised  that  this  is  not  our  rest ;  better  things  are  prepared  for 
us.  He  will  make  amends  for  all  your  sorest  trials  and  dis- 
comforts.    Oh,  to  be  there ! 

"  Many  thanks,  dear  brother,  for  your  kind  note  of  yester- 
day. How  unspeakably  sweet  is  that  love  which  unites  the 
members  of  the  one  body — Jesus  Himself  the  Head !  Ye  are  all 
one  in  Christ  Jesus.  This  love  is  one  of  the  strongest  evidences 
of  our  adoption,  and  one  of  the  most  sweet  unfoldings  of  our 
spiritual  life.  Christ  has  but  one  church,  but  one  spouse — all 
born  of  one  Spirit,  and  by  that  self-same  Spirit  educating  for 
the  place  Jesus  has  gone  to  prepare.  Is  not  this  a  blessed 
thought  ?  I  seem  to  stand  upon  the  margin,  ready  to  pass 
over;  and,  standing  where  I  do,  can  affirm  that  all  is  true, 
gloriously  true.  Oh,  the  thought  of  reahzing  the  whole  truth  ! 
Dear  brother,  this  life  of  sickness  and  suffering  is  worth  ten 
thousand  worlds,  for  it  brings  us  to  live  more  as  helpless  children 
on  God,  and  more  readily  to  realize  the  world  to  come.  Be 
of  good  cheer,  and  work  on ;  the  more  you  are  made  to  feel 
your  weakness,  the  more  welcome  are  you  to  Christ." 

"  Ever  varyin^g  are  the  dealings  of  our  God,  but  they  are  all 
in  wisdom  and  in  love.  He  knows  the  windings  and  the  wants 
of  our  immortal  souls,  and  so  fits  His  dispensations  as  to  ac- 
complish the  great  work  to  be  carried  on  there.  Oh,  it  is  a 
great  work,  for  it  is  to  glorify  a  great  King !  Had  we  our 
way,  how  should  we  mar  this  work ;  and  yet  how  often  are  we 
tempted  to  dictate  to  Him  who  is  so  skilfully  carrying  it  on ! 
Deeply  do  I  feel  for  you.  You  love  your  work;  and  yet  the 
Lord,  who  loves  you  better  than  you  love  yourself,  is  laying 
you  aside  from  it.  Oh,  could  we  but  take  a  glimpse  within  the 
vail,  we  should  see  how  intent  the  eye  of  Jesus  was  upon  the 
progress  of  His  own  mighty  work  in  our  souls ;    and  in  the 


382  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

midst  of  the  many  infirmities  of  body  from  which  you  suffer, 
you  would  see  that  even  in  that  state  what  great  things  He 
was  accompHshing  in  and  by  you !  You  are  now  in  the  fur- 
nace, but  Christ  is  with  you.  But  I  know  something  of  the 
working  of  the  heart,  the  sighs,  the  regrets,  perhaps  the  repin- 
ings,  and  the  ten  thousand  drawbacks  springing  out  of  the 
flesh ;  and  Satan  making  the  most  of  them  to  cause  us  to 
murmur,  and  vainly  to  suppose  that  we  could  manage  better 
for  ourselves.  But,  beloved,  though  you  know  all  these  things, 
you  will  not  be  offended  with  an  old  warrior,  who  has  had  a 
thousand  battles  with  this  arch  foe,  and  should  have  fallen  a 
prey  to  his  devices,  had  not  Jesus  interposed  His  shield,  and 
quenched  the  fiery  darts.  '  Does  God  love  me  ?  Is  He  my 
reconciled  Father?  If  so,  why  these  aflQictions,  why  these 
temptations  ?'  Thus  is  the  believer  often  tempted  to  reason. 
Thus  have  I  been  tried,  and  thus  too  have  argued.  But  now 
that  I  am  hastening  to  my  happy  home,  I  can  look  back  and 
testify  to  you  and  to  others,  that  the  trial  of  your  faith  is  much 
more  precious  than  gold,  though  it  he  tried  with  fire.  Jesus  was 
a  tried  stone,  the  apostles  were  tried  men, — as  soon  as  a  sinner 
is  born  of  the  Spirit,  he  enters  uj^on  a  school  of  trial,  and  this 
is  the  path  to  the  kingdom." 

The  following  is  the  last  letter  she  penned  to  this  beloved 
and  afflicted  minister  of  the  Lord  Jesus,  written  at  the  com- 
mencement of  her  final  illness,  and  dated  as  from  the  confines 
of  glory. 

"  My  dear  brother  in  Jesus,  I  am  ill,  preparing  to  obey  the 
summons,  'Come  up  hither.'  And  oh,  how  blessed  is  the 
prospect !  Eternal  love  !  eternal  glory  !  To  be  ever  with  the 
Lord,  basking  in  the  sunshine  of  his  blessed  countenance !  I 
shall  be  there  to  welcome  you  home.  Take  courage,  dear 
brother,  for  it  is  all  true  and  all  glorious.  The  more  I  am 
enabled  to  realize  the  mission  of  Jesus  to  this  lower  world,  the 
more  my  whole  soul  is  filled  with  joy  and  hope.  /  know  the 
thoughts  that  I  thiyik  toiuards  you,  saith  the  Lord !  thoughts  of 
-peace,  and  not  of  evil,  to  give  you  an  expected  end.  Reading  this 
passage  to-day  filled  my  heart  with  a  blessed  conviction  that, 
both  in  the  Old  and  in  the  New  Testaments,  Jesus  was  the 
speaker,  and  that  what  He  was  then  He  is  now.  Be  of  good 
courage,  dear  brother;  we  shall  surely  see  Him  and  dwell 
with  Him  for  ever  and  ever.     Amen  and  Amen." 

How  soon  was  this  blessed  hope  realized !     A  few  brief 


LETTER   TO   THE   REV.    D.    F.    JARMAN.  383 

months  of  increased  suffering  intervened,  and  Mr.  Jarman 
finished  his  course,  and  went  to  join  her  glorified  spirit  before  the 
throne.  She  had  preceded  him,  as  she  desired,  and  was  there 
to  *  w^elcome  him  liome.'  And  now  that  he  is  gone,  it  may 
not  be  inappropriate  to  embody  in  this  work  a  brief  quotation 
from  a  letter,  the  publication  of  which,  Avhile  he  lived,  might 
liave  grieved  the  lowliness  of  his  affectionate  spirit.  In  for- 
Avarding  her  Correspondence,  Mr.  Jarman  thus  remarks : — 

".  .  .  .  Not  only  are  they  highly  characteristic  of  dear 
Mrs.  "Winslow's  elevation  and  spirituality  of  mind,  but, 
being  among  her  last  letters,  they  exhibit  her  at  her  very 
highest  stage  of  Christian  attainment  and  proximity  to  heaven. 
They  show,  too,  how  she  united  practical  godliness  with  the 
blessed  visions  of  her  home  and  her  glorified  Saviour.  Rapture 
never  made  her  forgetful  of  her  own  daily  duties,  or  the  human 
trials  and  cares  of  others.  She  was  never  exalted  above 
measure  by  the  abundance  of  the  revelation  given  unto  her ; 
but  you  cannot  help  observing  that  she  constantly  employs,  in 
her  letters,  these  bright  visions  of  Christ  which  she  enjoyed  to 
the  enforcement  of  greater  activity  and  patience  in  the  believer's 
warfare.  To  have  known  a  spirit  Avho  could  pen  such  words 
and  such  truths,  is  one  of  the  greatest  privileges  of  my  life. 
I  feel  it  has  done  me  good.  I  trust  it  has  drawn  me  much 
nearer  to  God.  I  believe  it  has  elevated  my  faith,  and  in- 
troduced me  to  clearer  views  of  my  rest  and  of  my  glorified 
Saviour.  I  never  shall  forget  her  or  her  heavenly  conversation. 
In  my  case,  the  influence  of  acquaintance  was  not  the  only  one 
she  produced  on  me.  Most  powerfully  did  I  feel  attracted 
towards  her  even  in  our  first  interview,  and  before  any  letters 
had  passed  between  us.  I  think,  and  I  believe  I  may  say,  that 
attraction  ripened  into  the  deepest  regard  on  both  sides ;  and 
I  cannot  read  the  expressions  of  love  and  sympathy  in  her 
precious  letters,  without  deeply  feeling  that  I  have  lost  a  very 
dear  mother  in  Israel.  Oh,  that  God's  Spirit  may  so  sanctify 
the  regard  she  felt  towards  me,  that  it  may  daily  draw  me 
upwards  to  her,  and  may  give  force  and  power  to  her  kind  and 
invaluable  advice  !  Oh,  that  the  remembrance  of  what  she 
was  may  help  to  prepare  me  for  beholding,  with  increased  love 
and  closer  communion,  what  she  is  !  I  commit  the  enclosed  to 
your  careful  keeping.  Do  not  mislay  them  in  the  very  per- 
plexing work  of  selecting  examples  of  her  correspondence  for 
the  memoir,  for  very  precious  are  her  w^ords  to  me,  and  the 


384  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW. 

truths  they  contain.  May  God  bless  your  efifort,  and  make  it 
very  useful. 

"Yours,  with  every  expression  of  regard  and  sympathy, 

"David  Fenton  Jarman." 

But  her  work  was  not  yet  finished.  Gently  led  back  to 
earth,  as  from  the  gates  of  the  celestial  city,  she  was  not  only 
to  be  the  recipient  of  a  new  joy  enkindled  by  a  work  of  grace 
in  those  so  dear  to  her,  but  she  was  still  to  scatter  around  her 
the  golden  fruit  of  her  rich  and  matured  experience  as  she 
passed  to  her  eternal  home.  We  glean  a  few  of  the  riper 
ears. 

"Dear-beloved  Friend, —  Leamington,  July  28. 

"  How  glad  was  I  to  see  your  well-known  hand- 
writing, for  it  was  long  since  I  had  either  heard  of,  or  from 
you!  Think  you  that  all  this  time  I  could  forget  you?  Oh 
no,  dear,  dear  friend ;  the  remembrance  of  you  is  as  dear  as 
ever;  and  we  shall  meet  above  in  our  Father's  house.  And, 
oh,  that  meeting !  to  be  always  together,  and  to  go  no  more 
out  for  ever.  Cheer  up,  Jesus  is  there,  your  Jesus  and  mine. 
And,  next  to  Him,  I  may  be  ready  to  bid  you  welcome.  He 
is  risen  from  the  dead,  and  He  will  raise  our  dead  bodies,  and, 
vile  and  troublesome  as  they  now  are,  yet  shall  they  be  re- 
newed like  unto  His  glorious  body,  and  we  shall  be  ever  with 
the  Lord.  I  have  been  a  great  sufferer  for  a  long  time,  and, 
in  my  eighty-first  year,  it  is  hard  to  bear.  And  yet  Jesus 
sweetens  every  care,  and  His  kindness,  oh,  how  great !  He 
has  favoured  me  at  times  with  such  glimpses  of  the  glory  that 
is  round  about  the  great  white  throne,  on  which  He  is  seated, 
that  it  seems  as  if  I  could  not  have  much  more  w^hile  in  the 

flesh.     Help   me  to    praise  Him And  now,  my  dear 

friend,  I  feel  my  strength  failing,  and  must  lay  down  my  pen. 
Tender  love  to  your  dear  sister,  and  to  dear  Mr.  P — — .  I 
cannot  tell  you  how  dear  you  are  to  me.  Can  I  ever  forget 
you,  on  earth  or  in  heaven  ?  No,  never,  never.  May  the 
Lord  bless  you  with  much  of  His  spirit.  One  word  on  the 
blessed  manifestation  of  Jesus  to  our  longing  souls.  Let  us 
never  be  satisfied  Avithout  this  precious  recognition.  I  meet 
with  many  professing  Christians  who  appear  to  know  nothing 
about  it,  and  therefore  know  not  what  it  is  to  rejoice  with  joy 
unspeakable  and  full  of  glory.  But  I  seem  as  if  I  could  not 
stop.     I  will  meet  you  above.     I  do  so  love  you." 


ON    CLOSENESS   OF   SPIRITUAL   WALK.  385 


TO     MISS    A .    ON    CLOSENESS    OF    SPIRITUAL    WALK. 

"  My  dear  YOUNG  Friend, —  Leamington,  June  9. 

"  Many  thanks  for  your  kind  letters,  which  I  have 
been  too  ill  to  answer.  Through  much  tender  mercy,  the 
Lord  has  again  raised  me  from  a  bed  of  severe  suffering ;  and 
may  this  painful  dispensation  be  abundantly  sanctified  to  the 
soul.  There  was  a  needs-be  for  it  all.  The  Lord  does  not 
willingly  afflict  the  children  of  men,  but  for  their  profit.  This 
is  designed  to  be  the  place  where  God's  children  are  disciplined 
for  their  bright  and  better  home  above.  And,  oh,  dear  friend, 
what  must  be  that  place  which  infinite  love  and  power  are 
preparing  for  us,  unworthy  though  we  are  !  Oh,  the  boundless 
love  of  Jesus,  our  own  Jesus,  who  lived  and  sufi'ered,  died  and 
rose  triumphant  from  the  grave,  and  is  now  seated  on  His 
throne,  ready  to  receive  every  poor,  needy  sinner  that  comes 
to  Him  for  salvation,  or  for  grace  to  help  in  time  of  need ! 
This  is  the  precious  Friend  I  would  recommend.  Remember, 
you  are  not  coming  to  a  stranger.  When  you  come  to  Jesus, 
you  come  to  one  who  is  bone  of  your  bone,  and  flesh  of  your 
flesh.  Be  not  afraid  of  taking  all  your  concerns  to  Him,  how- 
ever trifling  they  may  be.  He  has  an  ear  to  listen  to  the 
feeblest  request  you  have  to  make.  You  cannot  go  to  God, 
the  mighty  God,  but  in  Christ,  the  man  Christ  Jesus.  Now, 
this  is  the  Jesus  whose  ear  listens  to  our  smallest  requests; 
and  when  we  carry  them  to  Him,  we  the  more  honour  Him, 
seeing  that  we  believe  what  He  affirms  to  be  true — Without 
me  ye  can  do  nothing.  Dear  friend,  let  us  all  agree  to  live  more 
decidedly  for  a  glorious  eternity.  We  are  here  but  for  a  little 
while  and  then  we  pass  away.  Live  more  upon  Him.  Do 
not  walk  at  a  distance.  The  more  you  go  to  Him,  tlie  better 
you  will  become  acquainted  with  Him,  and  feel  you  really 
cannot  do  without  Him.  Hold  fast  your  oneness.  You  are 
a  partaker  of  His  nature,  and  He  of  yours,  sin  only  excepted. 
Make  sure  your  calling  and  election.  Keep  near  to  your  best 
Friend,  who  has  heaven  and  earth  at  His  command.  A  crown 
of  glory  awaits  the  poor  sinner  that  clings  to  Jesus.  Who 
would  not  live,  and  die  too,  for  a  crown  of  glory  ?  Oh,  let  us 
entreat  all  we  love  to  cast  in  their  lot  with  us,  and  surely 
we  will  do  them  good !  My  tender  love  to  your  very  dear 
mother  and  sisters.  Ever  think  of  me  as  one  who  prays  for 
17 


386  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

your  best  interests,  and  hopes  to  meet  you  in  that  better  world 
to  which  we  are  so  rapidly  approaching." 


TO    MISS    M.    C ,    ox    THE    ILLNESS    OF    HER    SON    0- 


"  Beloved  Feiend, —  Leamington,  July  24 

"  Unite  your  prayers  with  ours  for  dear  0 ,  who 

is  very  ill  in  Paris.  We  only  heard  last  evening :  and  the 
moment  he  can  be  moved,  he  will  be  with  us,  if  God  so 
wills  it.  We  are  greatly  tried.  Jesus  is  now  my  stronghold. 
He  can  heal,  and  He  only." 

"  Monday. — By  the  last  accounts, was  a  shade  better. 

Oh,  that  it  may  be  abundantly  sanctified  to  us  all !  An  espe- 
cial prayer-meeting  was  held  on  Saturday  evening.  Major 
T ,  who  was  there,  says  he  never  heard  more  earnest,  fer- 
vent petitions  offered  up  as  then.  My  soul  is  able  to  rest  in 
Jesus,  and  my  eye  is  continually  up  to  Him.  Oh,  the  mercy 
of  having  such  a  Friend  in  Heaven,  who  is  able  to  do  all  we 
call  upon  Him  for !  They  leave  Paris  for  Dover  on  Tuesday, 
where  we  go  to  meet  them."  May  the  Lord  bless  you  for  all 
the  tender  expressions  of  your  love  to  me  and  mine." 

"  Wednesday  morning. — Oh,  what  a  God  we  have  to  do 
with — so  slow  to  anger,  so  ready  to  forgive !  Help  me  to 
praise  and  adore  His  holy  name.  I  have  just  had  a  blessed 
interview  with  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth,  and  He  will  do  all 
things  well  for  me  and  mine.  I  did  not  forget  you,  and  I 
know  he  heard  me,  and  listened  to  all  I  had  to  say  and  to  ask 
at  His  blessed  hands.  Oh,  there  is  a  needs-be  for  every  trial ! 
He  loves  us  too  well  to  grieve  us ;  but  we  need  sharp  disci- 
pline to  cause  us  to  know  the  wondrous  love  He  bears  towards 
us,  and  in  order  to  bring  us  to  cling  closer  to  Him.  No  tongue 
can  tell  how  much  I  have  enjoyed  of  nearness  and  holy  mani- 
festation, and  endearing  intercourse  of  Jesus,  in  this  late  trial. 
Beloved,  we  shall  have  to  thank  Him  through  eternity  for 
every  sorrow  we  have  had  while  training  us,  as  it  does,  for 
that  full  enjoyment  that  awaits  us  above.  This  late  trial  has 
loosened  another  peg  of  my  earthly  tent,  and  unfolded  to  me 
more  of  the  heart  of  Him  who  once  on  earth  was  the  Man  of 
sorrows  and  acquainted  with  grief.  And  now  you  w411  be 
impatient  to  hear  more  of  our  invalid ;  but  my  heart  was  so 
brimful  of  love  to  Jesus — for  that's  the  name  I  most  love  — 
that  I  was  obliged  to  lodge  a  little  of  its  overflowing  in  your 
loving  bosom  before  I  could  come  down  to  the  creature,  how- 


LETTER   TO    THE   REV.  E.  C.  W .  387 

ever  dear.     Dear is  better,   and  they  are  preparing  to 

leave  Paris  for  Dover.     How  thankful  I  am  dear  E was 

able  to  nurse  him,  and  he  could  not  have  had  a  better !  " 

"  Dover. — I  know  you  will  join  your  praises  with  mine  to  the 

Giver  of  all  good,  for  His  great  mercy  in  so  far  restoring . 

Oh,  these  frail  bodies !  How  all  these  thing  should  remind  us 
that  God  has  some  better  thing  in  store  for  His  chosen,  while 
He  constantly  says  to  us,  Arise^  my  love,  my  fair  one,  and  come 
away.  And  yet  how  closely  do  we  cling  to  earth  and  to 
earthly  creatures.  But  who  would  not  love  Him,  whose  ear 
bends  down  to  listen  to  our  requests,  saying  to  us,  WJiat  is  thy 
petition,  and  what  is  thy  request  f  Open  thy  mouth  ivide,  and  I 
will  fill  it.  Oh,  let  us  draw  largely  upon  this  treasure-house 
of  blessing  !  The  oftener  we  come,  the  more  welcome.  Why 
does  the  Lord  try  us,  but  that  we  may  try  Him,  and  prove 
that  he  is  able  and  willing  to  do  all  that  He  has  promised? 
We  often  ask  with  so  much  unbehef  in  our  hearts,  the  wonder 
is  that  He  condescends  to  hear  or  answer  us  at  all.  We  have 
met  with  some  dear  saints  here,  richly  taught  of  God.  The 
Lord  bless  vou." 


TO    THE    REV.    E.    C.    W- 


"  Dear  Brother, —  Leamington,  May  12. 

"For  this  I  beheve  you  to  be.  My  reason  for 
addressing  you  now  is  to  acknowledge  the  receipt  of  your  kind 
letter  to  my  dear  son,  who  is  just  hurrying  to  town,  and  has 
not  a  moment  to  write.  Your  letter  was  a  sweet  word  of 
encouragement  to  him,  and  I  promised  to  drop  you  a  line  of 
thanks  on  his  behalf.  Your  note  was  so  hke  a  loving  disciple 
of  a  loving  Saviour.  How  truly  does  the  Eternal  Spirit  knit 
the  children  of  God  to  each  other !  This  is  one  of  the  most 
incontestable  evidences  of  their  sonship.  Although  I  have  not 
seen  you  or  your  dear  wife,  as  soon  as  I  read  your  letter,  my 
heart  went  out  towards  you.  The  Lord  Jesus  has  but  one 
church,  and  this  is  composed  of  all  who  are  born  of  the  Spirit. 
They  may  be  scattered  up  and  down  through  the  wilderness, 
but  He  knows  where  to  find  them,  and  will  make  no  mistakes. 
As  it  respects  myself,  my  pilgrimage  may  soon  terminate,  but 
the  prospect  brightens  as  it  draws  near.  It  is  my  wish  to 
encourage  all  that  are  journeying  to  heaven,  to  get  much  of 
Christ  in  their  souls  while  here,  not  only  for  their  present 
comfort,  but  beheving  that,  in  the  same  proportion,  they  will 


388  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

enjoy  the  glory  of  heaven  hereafter.  There  every  vessel  will 
be  full ;  but  the  soul  enlarged  while  here  will  contain  the  same 
proportion  there.  There  will  be  no  lack  felt,  for  every  vessel 
will  be  full.  God  be  praised  for  the  hope,  the  blessed  hope 
of  eternal  life  beyond  a  poor  dying  world.  I  perceive  you  are 
one  of  his  tried  ones.  It  is  all  right.  I  have  waded  through 
seas  of  sorrow,  but  now  bless  the  Lord  for  all.  I  do  believe 
He  loves  us  so  that  He  would  not  lay  the  weight  of  a  finger 
upon  us,    but  for  some  special  good,  and  to  bring  us  to  know 

Him  better May  the    Lord   heal  you,   dear  Christian 

brother  and  sister  in  the  Lord.  If  we  do  not  meet  here,  we 
shall  above.  Let  us  reahze  what  awaits  us.  Oh,  help  me  to 
praise  and  adore  Him  who  has  given  us  such  a  hope,  such  a 
blessed  hope !  How  we  will  sing  in  heaven !  Live,  dear 
friends,  in  anticipation  of  the  glory  to  come.  ...  I  often  think, 
if  anything  will  make  us  ashamed  in  heaven,  it  will  be  the 
recollection  of  our  mibeheving  prayers.  Oh,  for  the  spirit  of 
prayer,  and  for  the  faith  of  prayer  !  This  brings  heaven  down 
into  the  soul,  and  lifts  the  soul  towards  heaven.  We  ought 
to  have  to  do  with  Jesus  all  the  day  long,  and  the  more  we 
have  to  do  with  Him,  the  more  we  shall  resemble  Him." 

TO    G.    M ,    ESQ.,    ON    THE    LOSS    OF    HIS    CHILD. 

"...  I  have  only  within  a  few  moments  heard  of  your  loss. 
May  the  Lord  comfort  your  heart,  and  make  this  affliction  a 
stepping-stone  to  lift  you  nearer  to  Himself,  and  a  little  higher 
towards  your  heavenly  home.  This  is  not  our  rest,  and  the 
Lord  causes  us  to  find  it  so.  The  Lord,  who  loves  you  better 
than  you  love  yourself,  knows  how  and  when  to  pour  the 
balm  of  consolation  into  your  soul,  saying  to  you  as  He  once 
did  to  me,  '  I  have  done  it.'  Oh,  to  live  so  with  God  as  to 
listen  to  the  still  small  voice  of  His  Spirit,  responding,  '  Speak, 
Lord,  for  thy  servant  heareth ! '  This  He  often  does  in  His 
providence,  and  still  oftener  when  interceding  with  Him  in 
earnest  prayer.  Sin,  dear  brother,  threw  us  at  an  immense 
distance  from  God,  but  Christ  came  to  bring  us  back  again, 
and  the  Spirit  is  given  to  draw  us  sensibly  near.  May  He 
speak  to  you  in  this  trying  dispensation,  and  comfort  you  as 
mortal  cannot.  It  is  inexpressibly  delightful  to  know  that  in 
all  our  tribulations  we  have  access  to  the  ear  of  God,  and  His 
heart,  too,  is  ready  to  answer.  Let  not  the  enemy  suggest  to 
your  sorrowing  heart  that  the  Lord  docs  not  love  you,  or  He 


TO    A    CHRISTIAN    FRIEND.  389 

would  not  chasten  you  in  this  waj.  The  Lord  does  chasten 
those  whom  He  loves,  and  for  wise  and  gracious  purposes  too. 
Let  us  lie  passive  in  His  hands,  leaving  ourselves  to  be  dealt 
with  according  to  His  infinite  wisdom  and  love.  Nestle  in 
the  bosom  of  Jesus,  and  wait  until  He  speaks  peace  to  you. 
Our  dear  pastor  has  arrived  safe,  and  is  now  with  Jesus,  and 
ere  long  we  shall  join  Him  there.  Let  us,  then,  live  more  for 
eternity,  and  less  for  this  poor  dying  Avorld.  I  know  you  have 
your  cares ;  but  if  you  would  carry  them  simply  to  Christ,  He 
would  make  the  rough  places  plain,  and  the  crooked  straight. 
In  every  difficulty,  go  at  once  to  Jesus,  before  you  decide  in 
your  own  mind,  or  listen  to  the  dictates  of  your  own  heart. 
Seeing  you  are  shut  up  to  God,  let  this  trying  dispensation 
result  in  a  closer  fellowship  with  Him ;  for  I  am  persuaded  He 
so  loves  you,  that  He  would  not  lay  the  weight  of  a  feather 
upon  you  more  than  is  needful.  The  love  of  Jesus  passeth  all 
knowledge,  here  and  hereafter.  We  shall  never  be  able  to 
fathom  or  come  to  the  end  of  it.  You  may  know  these  things 
better  than  I ;  but  when  unexpected  trial  comes,  Satan  en- 
deavours to  fill  the  mind  with  misgivings  and  doubts  about  our 
interest  in  our  best  beloved,  our  dearest  Friend  in  heaven ; 
and  it  is  for  this  I  venture  to  send  you  these  few  lines." 

TO    A    CHEISTIAN    FRIEND. 

"  .  .  .  .  Thus  has  the  Lord  tried  us ;  but  His  goodness  has 
been  manifested  all  through.  He  has  heard  and  answered 
prayer  again  and  again  ;  and  I  have  often  thought  it  was  worth 
a  few  -trials  to  experience  the  blessedness  of  having  constantly 
to  do  with  One  who  is  so  ready  to  do  all  we  call  upon  Him 
for,  so  able,  so  willing,  so  blessedly  true  to  His  own  word. 
"We  must  try  the  Lord  before  we  can  know  Him ;  but  first  He 
must  try  us,  before  we  will  ever  try  Him.  In  this  way  our 
trust  and  faith  in  God  is  increased,  and  our  souls  established  in 

the  truth.    I  have  written  to  dear  Mrs.  W ,  and  I  do  hope, 

and  indeed  I  do  believe,  she  will  have  to  say  this  was  one  of 
the  richest  and  most  fruitful  seasons  of  spiritual  blessing  of  her 
whole  life.  The  just  shall  live  hy  faith.  The  Lord  has  now 
placed  her  in  such  a  position  as  to  compel  her  to  know  more 
of  Himself  and  more  of  her  own  heart,  and  to  put  her  trust  in 
His  faithfulness  to  the  test.  I  could  say  to  her,  if  it  did  not 
appear  unsympathizing,  I  wish  you  joy !  I  did  not  know, 
dear  sister,  of  your  own  illness.     I  trust  you  are  better  and 


890  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

nearly  restored  by  this  time.  I  feel  at  times  feeble,  but  still 
travel  on,  sometimes  rejoicing,  and  sometimes  sorrowing  over 
the  evil  within.  I  w^ould  be  holy  as  God  is  holy ;  but,  oh,  the 
conflict  makes  one  long  to  depart  and  be  with  Christ,  which 
^v\\\  be  far  better ;  so  we  think  !  But  the  Lord  is  more  glori- 
fied by  the  exercise  of  our  faith  while  battling  with,  and  over- 
coming the  host  of  evil  without,  and  with  a  host  yet  more 
formidable  within.  How  easy  were  it  for  Him  to  remove  all 
sin  in  a  moment ;  but  is  it  not  more  for  His  glory  that  the 
work  of  the  Holy  Spirit  should  be  made  more  manifest  in  our 
souls  in  subduing,  counteracting,  and  overruling;  overruling 
that  for  good  which  would  be  otherwise  dire  destruction  ?  And, 
oh,  is  it  not  that  thing  that  lays  us  low  and  keeps  us  humble 
at  his  feet?  I  am  longing  and  praying  for  a  gracious  revival. 
Often  do  I  go  to  the  Lord  and  say,  '  What  hinders,  what  re- 
strains the  blessing  ?  Why  not  here  ?  What  was  done,  and 
is  still  doing  in  America,  and  what  has  been  done  in  Scotland, 
Avhy  have  we  not  in  England  ?  Lord  Jesus,  send  us,  in  much 
mercy,  a  gracious  revival  in  our  churches.'  Join  your  prayers 
to  mine  for  this  blessing.  The  signs  of  the  times  are,  at  present, 
most  significant.  Is  the  Lord  on  His  way  ?  Is  He  coming 
whom  we  look  for  ?  It  is  a  time  for  much  prayer  and  looking 
up.  Oh  for  lamps  trimmed  and  brightly  burning,  that  we  may 
go  out  to  meet  the  Bridegroom  !  Soon  we  shall  be  in  glory. 
A  httle  while  and  we  pass  aw^ay,  and  are  for  ever  with  the 
Lord.  He  that  was  dead  is  alive,  and  because  He  lives  we 
shal]  live  also.  He  lives  for  us,  and  we  shall  live  together 
with  Him." 

TO    HER    DAUGHTER. 

"...  What  a  resource  is  prayer — prayer  to  that  God  who 
loves  and  hears  us  always !  We  do  know^  when  Ave  have  the 
ear  of  God,  w^hen  prayer  is  jjvayer.  Oh,  that  these  things 
might  be  made  plain  by  the  inward  teaching  of  the  Holy 
Ghost  to  those  we  love !  No  wonder  Paul  could  say.  Pray 
without  ceasing.  It  is  my  greatest  comfort  and  richest  employ- 
ment. I  often  have  so  much  to  ask,  I  know  not  how  to  stop. 
The  golden  sceptre  is  held  out,  and  my  mouth  is  open  to  make 
large  demands  upon  infinite  power  and  love.  Oh,  this  holy 
intercourse  !  Oh,  that  all  we  love  knew  more  about  it !  I 
only  intended  to  write  a  few  lines,  but  now  I  feel  as  if  I  could 
fill  a  sheet.     It  is  a  mercv  to  have  the  heart  rifjht  with  God — 


•      LETTERS   TO    HER    DAUGHTER.  891 

to  have  an  open  heart,  no  hindrances,  to  confess  and  forsake.  I 
think  there  is  nothing  on  earth  Hke  it.  No  happiness  that  all 
the  glory  of  this  world  could  produce  is  equal  to  that  of  a  broken 
heart  at  the  feet  of  Jesus.  It  is  sweet  to  creep  into  the  very 
bosom  of  Christ,  while  we  feel  how  utterly  worthless  and  un- 
worthy, yet  how  welcome  w^e  are." 

"  The   poor  woman  that  you  are   anxious   about,  dearest 

E ,  continues  the  same.     No  hope  yet,  but  still  anxious. 

At  evening  time  it  may  be  light  to  her  soul.  I  read  and 
prayed ;  she  groaned,  and  seemed  to  feel ;  that  was  all  the  en- 
couragement I  could  get.  It  is  in  the  Lord's  hands.  Oh, 
what  a  Avretched  thing  to  leave  the  concerns  of  the  soul  to  the 
last !  .  .  .  The  Lord  is  good  and  gracious,  slow  to  anger,  and 
of  great  kindness.  May  He,  dear  child,  make  you  useful 
where  you  are,  and  keep  you  near  Himself,  Remember,  you 
are  not  your  own,  but  belong  to  Christ.  You  are  to  do  His 
work,  and  have  no  will  but  His ;  for  be  assured  of  this  one 
thing.  His  will  is  best  at  all  times.  For  the  world,  I  would 
not  be  left  to  have  my  own  way  in  any  one  thing.  God  grant 
you  may  feel  the  same,  and  much  more  than  your  unworthy 
mother." 

"I  received  your  letter,  and  am  thankful  you  continue  well. 
May  the  Lord  keep  you  so,  in  his  own  tender  mercy,  and 
direct  your  every  step,  and  mine,  too.  The  providence  of  God 
is  a  sure  direction  to  the  believer  now,  as  the  pillar  of  cloud 
and  of  fire  was  to  the  Jev/s  of  old  ;  although  I  must  say  it  re- 
quires more  caution  and  prayer,  and  much  reliance  on  God,  to 
discern  His  will.  We  must  be  honest  when  we  ask  to  be  kept 
from  our  own  way ;  and  if  we  are  honest,  the  Lord  will  be  our 
guide ;  and  a  safe  guide  He  is  to  all  who  trust  in  Him." 

"We  had  rather  a  cold  ride,  but  the  country  to  me  i]"ver 
appeared  more  beautiful.  When  I  looked  around  me,  and 
thought  of  His  goodness  in  leaving  this  world  (which,  for  man's 
sin,  is  under  the  curse)  with  so  much  of  its  present  grandeur 
and  loveliness,  and  recollected  that  the  very  creatures  he  was 
thus  mindful  of,  really  hated  Him  in  their  hearts,  and  returned 
Him  nothing  but  evil  for  His  good,  I  could  have  wept,  and 
did  not  wonder  at  the  Prophet's  speaking  of  rivers  of  tears 
flowing  from  his  eye  as  he  thought  of  man's  rebellion  against 
God.'" 

"...  What  a  poor  creature  I  am,  within  and  without ! 
What  a  mercy  to  have  a  blessed  hope  of  a  thorough  renewing, 


^92  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

botli  of  soul  and  body ;  and  what  is  still  more  glorious,  both 
to  exist  in  union  through  a  vast,  an  interminable  existence ! 
Praise  be  to  God  for  this  thrice-blessed  hope,  worth  a  million 

of  worlds.     Hold  fast,   dearest  E ,  your  confidence,  and 

grow  in  grace  and  in  the  knowledge  of  God  your  Saviour. 
May  the  Lord  keep  you  from  all  evil,  and  your  eye  up  to  Him, 
that  you  may  call  upon  Him  in  every  time  of  need,  making 
known  your  requests  with  thanksgiving.  The  best  of  blessings 
rest  upon  you." 

"  It  is  wintry  cold.  Oh,  what  a  mercy  to  have  the  love  of 
Christ  keeping  the  heart  w^arm  within  !  May  it  never,  precious 
child,  be  dreary  winter  with  your  soul  and  mine ;  and  the  only 
way  to  prevent  this  is  to  keep  close  to  Jesus,  and  bask  in  the 
sunshine  of  His  blessed  countenance.  When  the  heart  glows 
with  the  love  of  God,  everything  looks  pleasant  and  happy. 
Happiness  felt  within,  makes  a  pleasant  prospect  without. 
"When  Christ  smiles,  all  is  light  and  lightsome.  May  the  Lord 
give  you  health  of  body  and  prosperity  of  soul,  and  enable  you 
to  cast  all  care  upon  Him,  w^ho  has  cared,  and  who  ever  will 
care  for  us.  It  were  heathenism  to  doubt,  when  God  Himself 
declares  it." 

"  My  beloved  child,  is  it  not  an  inexpressible  mercy  to  be 
enabled  to  see  God  in  everything,  and  in  everything  connected 
with  us  individually?  We  do  not  sufficiently  realize  this 
grand  truth,  that  we  are  in  Christ,  and  Christ  in  us.  We  ac- 
knowledge it  with  our  lips,  but  do  not  fully  from  the  heart 
believe  it !  and,  in  consequence,  we  lose  a  rich  enjoyment,  and 
fall  far  below  our  privilege." 


TO    HER    SON    O- 


"...  I  hope  you  received  my  note,  informing  you  that  I 
was  better,  and  again  in  the  drawing-room.  So  the  Lord 
graciously  deals  with  your  poor  mother — every  now  and  then 
giving  me  a  love-admonition  to  remind  me  that  this  is  not  my 
rest,  but  that  another  and  a  better  is  in  reserve  for  me.  And 
if  the  prospect  sometimes  appears  to  the  imagination  so  in- 
viting, '  what  must  it  be  to  be  there  ! '  How  great  is  His 
goodness,  that  even  here,  in  this  vale  of  weeping.  He  should 
at  times  afford  precious  glimpses  of  the  coming  glory,  and  a 
calm  assurance  that  it  is  all  ready  for  us,  waiting  but  our  fuU 
preparedness  for  its  enjoyment.  Last  evening  I  joined  the 
family  circle,  and  enjoyed  some  sweet  hynuis.     I  am  quite 


LETTER   TO    HEU    SOX  0 .  393 

certain  that  for  some  special  purpose  I  have  been  sent  back 
when  so  near  mj  home,  almost  in  sight  of  it.  A  little  while, 
yea,  a  little  while,  and  then !  May  I  then  be  better  pre- 
pared for  the  glory  that  shall  be  revealed  to  all  those  who  love 
his  appearing.      Oh,    for  stronger,   more   abiding,    increasing 

faith  !     I  am  just  expecting  Mrs.  General  F .     Lady  L 

and  Miss  M called  yesterday,  and  I  was  able  to  see  them. 

I  tell  you  this  that  your  mind  may  be  easy  on  my  account, 
and  that  you  may  enjoy  your  visit.     .     .     .     Tell  dear  Mrs. 

R she  must  learn  the  beautiful  piece,  'Jesus  wept,'  and 

play  it  for  me  when  we  again  meet,  if  permitted,  in  this  vale 
of  tears.  No  weeping  in  heaven  !  Blessed  be  God  for  the 
hope  He  has  given  us  beyond  this  scene  of  sin  and  sorrow. 
Let  us  arise,  and  travel  on,  and  '  Forward ! '  be  our  counter- 
sign. The  Christian  life  is  a  warfare,  a  conflict  of  faith  !  and, 
as  good  soldiers  of  Christ,  we  are  to  fight  our  way  to  glory 
under  the  banner  of  the  Captain  of  our  Salvation,  who,  as  the 
Mighty  Conqueror,  has  overcome  for  Himself,  and  has  paved 
the  way  for  us  to  follow.  Vs  it  not  a  fight,  the  flesh,  the  world, 
and  Satan,  all  withstanding  us  at  every  step?  But  Jesus 
stands  ready  to  be  a  present  help  in  our  every  time  of  need. 
I  am  increasingly  persuaded  that  it  is  alone  by  constant  inter- 
course with  Jesus  we  can  attain  to  anything  like  progression 
in  the  divine  life.  Oh,  preach  Jesus  more  and  more,  and  you 
will  never  labour  in  vain !  In  this  warfare  to  which  I  have 
alluded,  there  must  be  no  truce,  no  cessation.  Think  of  a  val- 
iant soldier  in  an  enemy's  country,  and  in  the  heat  of  the  bat- 
tle, resting  on  his  arms  before  he  has  gained  the  victory  !  The 
battle  never  ceases  until  we  enter  heaven  more  than  conquerors^ 
through  Him  that  hath  loved  us.  But  I  am  sorry  to  say,  we 
often  meet  with  what  we  call  in  the  army,  stragrjhrs — men 
who  grow  weary  of  following  the  troops,  who  linger  behind, 
and  sit  down  by  the  w^ayside.  These  are  hinderers  to  those 
who  are  engaged  in  the  heavenly  warfare,  and  are  a  dishonour 
to  their  glorious  leader.  Stir  up  such,  wherever  you  meet 
with  them.  Only  think  of  the  crown  of  glory,  and  the  '  Well 
done,  good  and  faithful  servant,''  that  awaits  the  overcoming 
saint,  the  faithful  follower  of  Christ !  This  subject  seems  to 
grow  upon  me  as  I  travel  on  ;  but  I  must  stop.  I  meet  with 
50  few  that  seem  to  be  in  right-down  earnest  in  this  holy, 
heavenly  warfare.  And  yet  what  is  there  on  earth  that  can 
compare  with  this  ?  A  warfare  it  is  of  vast  importance.  But 
IT* 


394  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

I  will  close.  Let  me  charge  you  to  avoid  everything  that 
may  injure  your  head,  and  thus  unfit  you  for  your  holy  en- 
gagements. A  true  soldier  in  this  eventful  battle  may  be  en- 
feebled by  long  exhaustion,  but  his  Captain  is  no  hard  task- 
master, and  provides  rest  for  His  weary  and  wounded  ones. 
But  I  must  conclude,  although  this  subject  opens  upon  me. 

My  love  to  the  dear  heads  of  the  R family,  and  to . 

Overlook  all  vain  repetitions  in  my  letters ;  remember  the 
aged  cannot  do  what  they  have  done.  There  is  more  in  my 
heart  than  it  can  well  contain.  Oh,  what  will  heaven  be ! 
There,  and  there  only  will  there  be  a  continuous  emptying  and 
filling  again  of  the  renewed,  sanctified  vessel  of  mercy.  Write 
to  me  soon." 

"  P.S.  I  have  written  to  Forbes  to  offer  my  proper  con- 
gratulations upon  the  Oxford  University  honour,*  which, 
through  his  indefatigable  exertions,  has  been  conferred  upon 
him,  not  forgetting  the  goodness  of  God  in  it." 

The  following  extract  should  have  appeared  in  an  earlier 
part  of  the  volume,  but  the  sentiments  it  contains  are  too 
valuable  and  precious  to  be  omitted : — 

"  Lord  Lyndhurst  is  now  able  to  see,  the  operation  having 
proved  entirely  successful.  Oh,  to  give  the  glory  of  all  our 
blessings  not  to  man,  but  to  God  !  How  needful  is  the  long- 
suffering  patience  of  a  good  and  gracious  God  to  us !  How 
slow  to  anger,  how  ready  to  forgive  !  How  we  ought  to  love 
Him,  and  by  our  love  make  up  the  deficiency  of  all  that  is 
lacking  in  those  that  love  Him  not !  How  sweet  it  is  to  go 
and  tell  Him  how  much  we  love  Him,  and  then  to  feel  that 
we  love  Him  because  He  first  loved  us !  "What  a  stupendous 
privilege,  this  holy  union  and  communion  with  Jesus — God- 
man  Mediator — God-with-us  !  How  blessed  it  is  to  open  our 
heart  just  as  it  is,  with  all  its  coldness,  deadness,  and  sinful- 
ness, to  Him,  keeping  nothing  back,  but  telling  Him  all !  What 
a  rehef,  under  any  circumstances,  is  the  mighty  privilege  ! 
Though  the  whole  world  were  to  turn  its  back  upon  us,  and 
clouds  gathered  thick  and  darkened  around,  yet  here  is  a 
shelter,  a  pavilion,  and  a  hiding-place,  full  of  comfort  and 
safety,  in  the  verv  heart  of  Jesus,  God's  dear  and  well-beloved 
Son. 

*  At  the  installation  of  the  Earl  of  Derby,  the  honorary  degree  of 
D.C.L.  was  conferred  upon  her  son,  Dr.  Forbes  Winslow. 


TELLING   JESUS    ALL.  895 

''  Oh,  the  mercy  of  mercies  to  know  Him,  even  were  there 
not  an  endless  hereafter,  when  we  expect  to  see  and  enjoy 
Him  through  an  endless  eternity  !  Shall  these  eyes  see  Jesus  ? 
Yes,  those  very  eyes  shall  behold  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth. 
Let  it  be  our  aim  to  glorify  Him  here,  and  when  we  fall  short, 
hasten  to  acknowledge  at  once.  Keep  nothing  back  from 
Christ.  Have  no  concealments.  Let  us  carry  our  failures 
and  misdoings,  our  seen  and  unseen  evil — evil  within  and  fears 
without — all,  all  at  once  to  Jesus.  He  has  engaged  to  heal 
all  our  diseases,  to  help  all  our  infirmities,  and  to  give  us  every 
possible  good  for  time  and  for  eternity.  Oh,  do  help  me  to 
praise  Him — help  me  to  love  Him!  I  think  if  I  had  ten 
thousand  hearts,  I  could  give  them  all  to  Him.  Good-bye. 
Do  not  go  where  there  is  fever,  nor  expose  yourself  to  the 
heat  of  the  day,  nor  overwork  yourself.  Remember,  the  body 
is  redeemed  as  well  as  the  soul,  and  that  both  belong  to 
Christ." 


CHAPTER    XIV. 

The  last  epoch  of  the  Christian's  hfe — such  a  life  as  these 
pages  have  attempted  to  portray — cannot  but  be  pecuharly 
interesting  and  impressive.  It  were,  perhaps,  incorrect  to 
speak  of  it  as  the  most  instructive  part  of  his  history.  A  pro- 
longed course  of  unreserved  consecration  to  Christ,  the  record 
of  which  would  be  but  a  continuous  testimony  to  the  truth  of 
the  Bible,  the  character  of  God,  and  the  power  of  the  Saviour's 
grace  in  upholding  and  succouring,  sanctifying  and  comforting 
the  believer,  must  necessarily  constitute  a  volume  of  instruc- 
tion, such  as  the  most  triumphant  departure  could  scarcely 
supply.  If  this  be  so,  of  how  much  greater  moment,  then,  is 
it  that  the  Christian  should  be  solicitous  how  he  should  live, 
rather  than  forestall,  by  vain  and  fruitless  speculations,  the 
question  how  he  shall  die  !  It  is  the  life,  and  not  the  death, 
that  supplies  the  most  satisfactory  and  assured  evidence  of  real 
conversion.  "Tell  me  not,"  says  the  excellent  John  Newton, 
"how  a  man  died  ;  rather  tell  me  how  he  lived.^'  Let  but  the 
religion  of  an  individual  be  a  living,  practical  embodiment  of 
the  noble  sentiment  of  Paul,  "For  me  to  live  is  Christ,"  and 
he  need  not  be  unduly  anxious  about  his  final  change ;  that 
change,  be  it  whatever  God  appoints,  must  be  his  gain.  It  is 
not  always  that  a  life  of  such  transcendant  beauty — '  the  beauty 
of  holiness' — as  that  which  we  have  sought  to  delineate,  is 
closed  by  a  departure  of  such  corresponding  interest  and 
grandeur.  As  if  to  illustrate  the  importance,  and  to  enforce 
the  lesson  of  a  holy  life,  as  a  thing  of  essential  moment,  God 
has  sometimes  disappointed  a  too  eager  and,  perhaps,  too 
curious  expectation,  and  has  taken  home  His  child,  not  in  a 
chariot  of  fire,  but  of  cloud.  We  are  now,  however,  to  trace 
the  harmony  between  an  eminently  godly  life,  and  a  singularly 
happy  death.  Indeed,  so  strangely  and  beautifully  alike  were 
the  two,  it  were  difficult  to  decide  which  the  most  became  her, 
and  which  brought  most  honour  to  God — the  dying  life  or  the 
living  death.     Both  were  emjiliatically — life  in  Jesus. 


LAST    EPOCH    OF    THE    CHRISTIAN    LIFE.  397 

The  reader,  as  he  unfolds  the  closing  leaves  of  this  volume, 
will  not  fail  to  mark,  we  will  not  say  the  growing  spirituality 
of  its  subject,  but  the  deepening  glory  into  which  she  was  so 
soon  to  enter.  Every  thought  and  word,  every  look  and  action, 
now  indicated  the  nearness  of  the  soul  to  a  higher,  nobler,  and 
more  genial  state  of  being.  While  the  '  weary  wheels  of  life  ' 
moved  slower  and  slower,  the  '  deathless  principle '  within 
gathered  fresh  strength,  and  with  uplifted  pinions  and  panting 
bosom,  waited  and  watched  the  signal  for  its  flight.*  Uncon- 
sciously to  herself,  but  visibly  to  all  around  her,  she  grew  still 
more  heavenly.  And  as  each  day  some  crumbling  fragment 
of  the  earthly  house  gave  way,  the  opening  chinks  let  in  upon 
her  soul  richer  streams  of  the  light  and  blessedness  of  the 
upper  world,  imparting  to  her  countenance  inimitable  beauty, 
and  to  her  conversation  an  indescribable  charm.  And  now 
she  wearied  to  be  gone.  As  pines  the  fond  child  for  its  home, 
as  sighs  the  way-worn  traveller  for  his  rest,  as  longs  the  storm- 
tossed  voyager  for  the  port,  so  panted  she  to  depart  and  be 
with  Christ. 

Nothing  could  now  exceed  the  hallowed,  elevating  tone  of 
her  conversation.  Many  flocked  to  her,  as  much  to  be  in- 
structed by  her  holy  counsels,  to  be  comforted  by  her  heavenly 
words,  and  to  be  encouraged  and  stimulated  by  her  trustful, 
cheerful  piety,  as  to  watch  the  growing  splendor  of  her  setting 
sun.  All  who  now  heard  her  testify  of  God,  of  Christ,  and 
of  heaven,  irresistibly  felt  what  a  reality  was  vital  religion, 
how  beautiful  was  gospel  holiness,  how  glorious  was  a  risen 
Saviour,  and  how  solemnly  true,  and  strangely  near,  was  the 
eternal  world  !  Turn  we  now  to  some  of  her  precious  thoughts 
gathered  from  her  closing  remains,  and  recorded  in  her  journal 
a  short  time  preceding  her  last  illness. 

"  There  remaineth,  therefore,  a  rest  for  the  j>eo2)le  of  God.  Oh, 
what  a  rest  that  will  be !  Sitting  down  to  rest  awhile  this 
aged  body,  I  am  reminded  of  that  blessed,  eternal  rest  prepared 
for  both  soul  and  body.     Lord,  let  me  even  here  find  Thyself 

•  "  The  nearer  slill  she  draws  to  land, 
The  more  her  sacred  joys  expand; 
With  steady  hehn,  and  well-bent  sail, 
Her  anchor  drops  within  the  vail  : 
Triumphant  now  she  claps  her  wings, 
And  her  celestial  sonnet  sings, 

Glorv  to  God  !  " 


398  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

my  sweetest  resting-place.  Oh,  to  rest  in  Thy  exceeding  great 
and  precious  promises — to  rest  in  Thy  tender,  unchanging  love 
— to  rest  in  Thy  Almighty  power  and  Godhead — to  rest  in 
Jesus,  my  own  Jesus,  who  has  made  Himself  over  to  me  as  my 
Saviour,  my  Redeemer,  and  Friend,  and  who  has  promised 
never  to  le^ve  nor  forsake  me  !  Then  He  is  here ;  and  while 
I  rest  this  weary  frame.  He  is  present  with  me.  Bless  the 
Lord  0  my  soul !  " 

"Texts  last  Sabbath:  morning — Now,  our  Lord  Jesus  Christ 
Himself,  and  God,  even  our  Father,  which  hath  loved  us,  and 
hath  given  us  everlasting  consolation  and  good  hope  through 
grace,  comfort  your  hea7'ts,  and  stahlish  you  in  every  good  word 
and  work.  2  Thess.  ii.  16,  17.  Evening — Thy  sun  shall  no 
more  go  down,  neither  shall  thy  moon  withdraiu  itself;  for  the 
Lord  shall  he  thine  everlasting  light,  and  the  days  of  thy  mourning 
shall  he  ended.  Isaiah  Ix.  20.  These  precious  portions  have 
been  each  a  word  of  rich  consolation  to  my  soul,  drawing  forth 
my  heart  to  the  Lord  in  gratitude  and  love.  Blessed,  for  ever 
blessed,  be  His  name  for  all  His  great  goodness  to  me  and 
mine.  What  a  God  has  He  been  to  me,  who  hath  loved  7ne 
a)id  given  me  everlasting  consolation  and  good  hope  through  grace, 
no  tongue,  no,  not  that  of  the  highest  angel  in  heaven  can  tell. 
They  know  not,  nor  can  they  enter  into  my  feelings ;  nor  have 
they  any  cognizance  of  what  is  passing  between  a  broken 
heart  for  sin  and  a  sin-forgiving  God.  My  sins,  which  are 
mountains  high,  are  all  pardoned,  blotted  out  of  the  book  of 
God's  remembrance  by  the  precious  blood  of  His  dear  and 
well-beloved  Son.  Praise  God  for  His  marvellous  goodness 
to  me  a  sinner." 

"  A  most  refreshing  view  of  Jesus  this  morning  has  filled 
my  heart  with  love,  and  joy,  and  hope — love  to  Him  who  has 
done  so  much  for  unworthy  me.  What  shall  I  render  unto 
Him  for  all  the  benefits  received  at  His  hands  ?  He  draws 
me  sensibly  near  to  Himself,  and  indulges  me  with  precious 
views  of  that  glory  that  will  be  revealed  in  me  and  in  all  them 
also  who  love  his  appearing." 

"  My  heart  within  me  leapeth, 
It  cannot  be  downcast ; 
In  sunshine  brig-ht  it  keepetb 
A  never-ending  feast. 

*'  The  sun  which,  sniiUng,  hghts  me, 
To  Jesus  Christ  alone, 


CLOSING    RECORDS    OF    DIAEY.  399 

And  what  to  sing  invites  me, 
Is  heaven  on  earth  begun  ?  " 

"  The  Lord  is  most  gracious  in  permitting  me  so  sensibly  to 
approach  him,  to  talk  with  Him  by  the  way,  to  hft  up  upon 
me  the  light  of  his  ineffable  countenance.  I  have  been  plead- 
ing with  Him  to-day  to  be  especially  near  to  me  in  a  dying  hour ; 
to  come  with  the  pale  messenger,  and  let  me  see  the  uplifting 
of  his  face,  irradiated  with  beams  of  love,  as  I  tread  that  dark 
valley.  Oh,  to  feel  Jesus  with  me  then,  applying  His  precious 
blood  to  my  conscience,  speaking  pardon,  peace,  love,  full  and 
complete  !  May  I  be  enabled  to  triumph  over  my  last  enemy, 
and  exclaim,  0  Death,,  where  is  thy  sting  f  0  Grave,  where  is 
thy  victory?  Bonar  remarks,  '  Our  life  throughout  is  one  un- 
ceasing battle  with  death,  until,  for  a  season,  death  conquers 
us,  and  we  fall  beneath  his  power ;  but  the  prey  shall  be  taken 
from  the  mighty,  and  his  victim  rescued  for  ever.  The  trum- 
pet shall  sound,  and  the  dead  shall  arise  triumphant  over  death, 
hell,  and  the  grave,'  " 

"  What  a  blessing  it  is  to  have  such  a  Friend  to  go  to  as 
Jesus,  wdth  all  our  difficulties,  small  and  great,  transferring 
them  to  His  hands  who  is  infinite  in  wisdom  and  in  power,  and 
will  do  all  things  well.  Is  not  this  a  mercy  worth  recording 
in  letters  of  gold,  to  be  written  in  the  deep  recesses  of  every 
believing  heart?  May  I  have  stronger  faith  and  deeper  views 
of  truth.  Lord,  impart  to  me  more  of  Thyself.  Fill  this  heart 
with  Thy  love,  engrave  Thine  image  there,  and  let  me  not 
lose  sight  of  Thee  for  one  small  moment." 

"Thou  Lamb  of  God,  Thou  Prince  of  Peace  ! 
For  Thee  my  thirsty  soul  doth  pine  ; 
My  longing  heart  implores  Thy  grace, 
Oh,  make  me  in  Thy  likeness  shine. 

'•  "With  guileless,  ever-humble  mind. 
Thy  will  in  all  things  may  I  see ; 
In  love  be  every  wish  resign'd, 
And  hallow"  d  my  whole  heart  to  Thee. 

"  Close  by  thy  side  still  may  I  keep, 
Howe'er  life's  various  currents  flow; 
With  steadfast  eye  mark  every  step,^ 
And  follow  Thee  where'er  Thou  go.*' 

"  How  can  I  ever  recount  the  wonders  of  His  love  !  Won- 
drous are,  and  ever  have  been,  all  His  doings  with  me.     His 


400  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

'vhole  heart  is  love,  and  nothing  but  love ;  nor  will  eternity 
see  its  end.  Thou  beloved  of  my  soul,  tell,  oh,  tell  me,  how 
I  can  show  forth  Thy  praise,  and  best  speak  of  Thy  Avondrous 
goodness  to  me,  the  chief  of  sinners.  I  think  of  what  Thou 
didst  suffer  for  me — Thy  night  of  watching,  Thy  day  of  grief, 
the  trial,  the  cruel  mockings,  the  thorny  crown,  the  breaking 
heart — all,  all  for  me,  my  sins,  my  cruel  sins,  charged  to  Thy 
account.  Jesus,  precious  Jesus,  put  such  a  heart  within  me 
as  shall  never  let  me  forget  for  one  moment  what  it  cost  Thee 
to  save  my  soul.  Hell  would  have  been  my  portion,  hadst 
thou  not  died  that  I  might  live  for  ever.  And  now,  what 
returns !  Often  the  worst.  Often  have  I  forgotten  Thee, 
though  Thou  hast  never  once  lost  sio-ht  of  me.  Dear  Jesus, 
give  me  a  heart  like  Thine  own.  I  cannot  be  satisfied  without 
one  cast  in  Thy  mould,  reflecting  Thy  own  likeness.  How 
precious  Thou  art  to  me,  language  fails  to  express.  I  cannot 
even  tell  Thee.  I  can  but  weep  out  my  love  at  Thy  feet,  and 
there  would  I  lie  to  all  eternity.  When,  dear  Lord,  shall  I 
see  Thee  face  to  face  ?  Prepare  me  for  the  last  struggle.  And 
should  the  enemy  come  in  like  a  flood,  arraying  my  sins 
before  me,  oh,  manifest  Thyself  then,  and  fill  the  gloomy  val- 
ley with  the  brightness  of  Thy  presence !  When  heart  and 
flesh  are  failing,  leave  me  not.  Be  gracious,  be  merciful,  and 
say  to  my  panting  spirit.  It  is  I,  he  not  afraid;  and  let  me 
leave  a  testimony  behind  to  Thy  unceasing  faithfulness.  Oh, 
blessed  prospect  of  soon  being  with  Thee  whom  my  soul 
loveth !  How  my  heart  bounds  at  the  thought.  And  shall  I 
behold  that  dear,  that  blessed  face  without  a  veil,  that  has  so 
often  beamed  upon  me  its  ineffable  love  and  sympathy? 
Lord,  I  love  Thee  with  a  love  so  ardent,  all  language  fails 
me." 

"  Have  been  much  impressed  with  some  remarks  on  the 

sight  of  the  dying.      '  The  late  remarked,  when  he  was 

dying,  '^  Mother,  I  can  see  a  great  distance,"  Doubtless  this 
is  the  experience,  beautifully  expressed,  by  every  one  who 
comes  with  a  chastened  faith  to  a  calm  deathbed.  In  his 
progress  through  ordinary  life,  the  vapors  that  float  in  his 
mental  atmosphere  render  the  vision  imperfect,  and  he  cannot 
see  afar  off;  but  as  he  draws  near  eternity,  the  air  grows  purer, 
the  light  brighter,  the  vision  clearer,  and  serenity  pervades 
the  whole  being ;  the  vista  of  futurity  opens  to  the  eyes  of  the 
soul ;  he   beholds  the   gate  of  heaven,  and  the   river  of  life, 


CLOSING   RECORDS   OF    DIARY.  401 

its  glad  waters  kissing  the  footstool  of  the  throne  of  God ;  the 
glories  of  the  new  world  grow  brighter  upon  him  ;  with  Ste- 
phen, he  beholds  Jesus  at  the  right  hand  of  the  Father ;  and 
as  he  dwells  with  rapture  on  these  entrancing  sights,  the  earth 
and  all  its  scenery  grows  dim  about  him,  and  like  Elisha's 
servant  at  the  gate  of  Damascus,  he  is  instantly  environed 
with  troops  of  angels  who  come  to  take  him  up  over  the  ever- 
lasting hills  in  the  chariot  of  the  Lord  of  Hosts.'  Oh,  that 
this  might  be  my  experience !  Then,  when  my  eyes  are 
closing  in  death,  may  I  have  these  refreshing,  far-seeing  views 
of  Jesus,  my  best,  my  dearest  Friend." 

"  Blessed  he  the  Lord^  my  strength,  ivhich  ttacheth  my  hands 
to  luar,  and  my  fingers  to  fight;  my  goodness  and  my  fortress^ 
my  high  toiver,  my  shield,  and  He  in  whom  I  trust.  Such  is 
God,  my  God,  to  his  unworthy  handmaid.  "Without  Him, 
hfe  w^ere  an  aching  void,  earth  a  wilderness  of  woe  and  sor- 
row.  He  it  is  Avho  maketh  my  heart  glad,  and  in  Him  I  con- 
fide. And  if  thus  He  can  transform  this  wilderness  into  a 
little  heaven,  making  it  radiant  with  His  presence,  what  must 
heaven  itself  be  !  " 

"  /  will  sing  of  Thy  poioer ;  yea,  I  ivill  sing  aloud  of  TJiy 
mercy  in  the  morning  ;  for  Thou  hast  been  my  defence  and  refuge 
in  the  day  of  my  trouble.  Unto  Thee,  O  my  strength,  will  1 
sing ;  for  God  is  my  defence  and  the  God  of  my  mercy.  Psa. 
lix.  16,  17.  This  has  God  been  to  me  throughout  my  event- 
ful pilgrimage  ;  and  so  is  he  now  that  that  pilgrimage  is  draw- 
ing to  its  close.  How  can  I  praise  Him  as  my  heart  desires  ? 
Language  fails  me,  and  thought  is  too  big  for  utterance.  Vast 
as  eternity  are  His  mercies,  infinite  His  perfections,  and  won- 
derful all  His  ways.  What  will  eternity  disclose  to  my 
astonished  sight,  my  ej^es  then  imveiled  to  see  what  now  I 
understand  not !  O  God  my  Lord,  draw  me  sensibly  nearer 
to  Thyself.  Reveal  to  me  Thy  hidden  love,  and  conform  me 
closer  to  Thy  image.  My  soul  longeth  to  behold  Thee,  to  see 
Thy  face  unveiled.  Surely  I  shall  know  Thee ;  for  have  I 
not,  even  in  this  vale  of  tears,  been  favoured  with  precious 
glimpses  of  Thy  countenance,  radiant  with  love  and  sympathy? 
When  trouble  has  threatened  to  overwhelm  me,  then  Thou 
hast  condescended  to  speak  comfortable  v.'ords  to  Thy  sorrow- 
ing child.  May  I  never  ferget  it !  May  I  be  humbled,  even  to 
the  dust,  for  my  base  returns ;  for  how  often,  when  fresh  trou- 
ble has  arisen,  I  have  so  little  remembered  past  deliverances. 
Oh,  the  baseness  of  man  ;  the  goodness  of  God  !  " 


402  MEMOIR   OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

"  Religion  should  be  tlie  whole  business  of  a  man's  life. 
Nothing  is  of  such  vast,  such  paramount  importance.  And  is 
not  the  thought  appalling,  that  it  is  one  of  the  last  things  the 
generality  of  men  think  of,  if  left  to  themselves?  Then  how 
ought  we  to  pray  for  and  exhort  sinners  to  repent  and  turn  to 
God!  Should  we  not  thus  reason  with  them — 'You  have 
departed  from  God :  repent  and  believe  the  Gospel ;  for  why 
will  ye  die  ?  "  This  should  be  our  expostulation  with  evei  y 
unconverted  person  we  meet.  May  the  Lord  make  us  faithful 
and  dihgent !  God  be  praised  for  the  boundless  love  treasured 
up  in  Jesus  for  every  poor  sinner  that  seeks  it  with  the  whole 
heart.  Let  us  who  believe,  pray,  and  exhort,  and  employ 
every  opportunity  to  arouse,  to  instruct,  and  win  all  to  Christ, 
who  has  life,  yea,  eternal  life,  to  give  to  all  who  seek  it  sin- 
cerely and  earnestly,  even  with  the  whole  heart." 

"  When  I  go  hence,  shall  not  my  ten  thousands  of  prayers 
be  answered  in  the  salvation  of  n  "^  seed  and  of  my  seed's 
seed  to  the  latest  generation  ?  Is  L  ^  not  a  God  bound  by 
His  own  word  to  answer  prayer  ?  and  did  He  not  promise  me 
in  the  days  of  my  deep  sorrow,  '  I  will  be  a  Father  to  thy 
fatherless  ?  '  And  oh,  how  blessedly,  in  spite  of  all  my  base- 
ness and  unworthiness,  has  He  fulfilled  that  promise  ?  As  for 
Me,  this  is  my  covenant  with  thee,  saith  the  Lord.  My  Spirit 
that  is  upon  thee,  and  my  words  which  I  have  put  in  thy  mouth, 
shall  not  depart  out  of  thy  mouthy  nor  out  of  the  mouth  of  thy 
seed,  nor  out  of  the  mouth  of  thy  seed^s  seed  saith  the  Lord,  from 
henceforth  and  for  ever.  Isa.  lix.  21.  May  I  not  take  this 
promise  to  myself?" 

"  Confined  to  my  bed.  All  my  thinkings,  and  all  my  doings, 
are  now  with  God.  I  have  to  deal  most  clearly  with  God  in 
Jesus  now.  He  is  all  in  all  to  me.  I  feel  a  blessed  nearness 
to  Jesus,  to  heaven.  My  soul  holds  converse  with  Him,  and 
sweet  I  find  it  to  lie  as  a  helpless  infant  at  His  feet ;  yea, 
passive  in  his  loving  hands,  knowing  no  will  but  His.  Holy 
and  distinguished  is  the  privilege  of  talking  with  Him  as  a 
man  talketh  with  his  friend,  without  restraint  or  concealment. 
What  a  mercy,  thus  to  unburden  the  whole  heart — the  tried 
and  weary,  the  tempted  and  sorrowful  heart — tried  by  sin, 
tried  by  Satan,  tried  by  those  you  love  !  What  a  mercy  to 
have  a  loving  bosom  to  flee  to,  one  truly  loving  heart  to  con- 
fide in,  which  responds  to  the  faintest  breathing  of  the  Spirit. 
Precious  Jesus,  how  inexpressibly  dear  art  Thou  to  me  at  this 


BEYOND    THE    SMILING    AND  TflE  WEEPINO.*'      40B 

moment !  Keep  sensibly  near  to  me.  Lift  up  upon  me  thy 
heavenly  countenance,  for  it  is  sweeter,  dearer,  better  than 
life." 

"  Oh,  the  abounding,  superabounding  mercies  of  my  God 
and  Father,  my  reconciled  Father,  to  my  soul !  How  amply 
has  He  met  my  every  exigence,  and  cared  for  my  necessities, 
body,  soul,  and  spirit,  and  manifests  Himself  to  me  in  this 
pleasant,  quiet  room.  Precious  Jesus,  Thou  hast  put  love  in 
the  hearts  of  all,  who  are  so  tender,  kind  and  loving  to  Thine 
aged  one ;  bearing  with  her  many  infirmities,  and  helping  me 
patiently  to  endure  my  weakness.  Blessed  be  Thy  name  for 
placing  me  beneath  this  roof  to  breathe  out  my  last  moments 
on  earth  here,  until  I  exchange   earth  for  heaven  with   dear 

to  watch  over  me,  and  finally  close  my  eyes,  when  I  shall 

re-open  them  in  glory.  Oh,  to  be  there !  Oh,  to  see  Jesus 
face  to  face !  To  behold  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth,  and  be 
with  Him  for  ever !     But  a  little  while,  and  I  am  there." 

"  Beyond  the  smiling,  and  the  weeping, 

I  shall  be  soon. 

Beyond  the  waking,  and  the  sleeping, 

Beyond  the  sowing,  and  the  reaping, 

I  !-hall  be  soon. 

Love,  rest,  and  home, 

Sweet  hope ! 

Lord,  tarry  not,  but  come  ! 

"  Beyond  the  blooming,  and  the  fading, 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Beyond  the  shining,  and  the  shading. 
Beyond  the  hoping,  and  the  dreading. 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Love,  rest,  and  home, 
Sweet  hope ! 
Lord,  tarry  not,  but  come ! 

"  Beyond  the  rising,  and  the  setting, 

I  shall  be  soon. 

Beyond  the  soothing,  and  the  fretting, 

Beyond  remembering,  and  forgetting, 

I  shall  soon  be. 

Love,  rest,  and  home, 

Sweet  hope! 

Lord,  tarry  not,  but  come  ! 

*'  Beyond  the  gathering,  and  the  strovving, 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Beyond  the  ebbing,  and  the  flowing, 
Beyond  the  coming,  and  the  going, 


404  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.   MARY    WINSLOW. 

I  shall  be  soon. 

Love,  rest,  and  home, 

Sweet  hope ! 

Lord,  tarry  not,  but  come  ! 

"Beyond  the  parting,  and  the  meeting, 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Beyond  the  farewell,  and  the  greeting. 
Hearts  fainting  now,  and  now  high  beating, 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Love,  rest,  and  home, 
Sweet  hope ! 
Lord,  tarry  not,  but  come! 

"Beyond  the  frost-chain,  and  the  fever, 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Beyond  the  rock-waste  and  the  river, 
Beyond  the  ever,  and  the  never, 
I  shall  be  soon. 
Love,  rest,  and  home, 
Sweet  hope ! 
Lord,  tarry  not,  but  come!" 

"  There  are  periods  in  one's  eventful  history  when  one  sees, 
and  yet  does  not  see,  hears,  and  yet  does  not  hear.  Thus, 
when  I  see  and  hear  what  I  would  not,  and  cannot  remedy,  I 
go  to  Jesus  and  disclose  my  impotence  to  Him,  beseeching 
Him  to  undertake.  Oh,  the  unspeakable  privilege  of  having  such 
a  resort,  a  resort  so  accessible  to  a  poor,  weary,  oft-tried  pilgrim, 
moving  on  through  a  wilderness  thronged  with  the  thorn  and 
the  briar,  and  often  echoing  with  the  bowlings  of  that  roaring 
lion  who  seeks  to  devour,  and  yet  cannot  touch  the  saints, 
since  the  Lio7i  of  the  tribe  of  Judah  has  chained  him  fast.  How 
true  that  it  is  a  life  of  faith  the  Christian  has  to  live  while 
passing  to  his  crown  of  glory  !  Many  are  the  trials,  disap- 
pointments, and  vexations  he  is  to  meet  with  by  the  way ;  but 
these  are  things  which  keep  the  life  of  faith  in  vigorous  exer- 
cise, work  the  soul's  best  interest,  and  glorify  God.  Whatever 
drives  or  allures  us  to  Jesus  is  a  blessing.  The  great  welfare 
of  the  soul  is  the  concern  of  heaven.  All  the  heavenly  host 
are  deeply  interested  and  absorbed  in  the  salvation  of  Christ's 
little  flock,  whom  the  Shepherd  that  died  for  them  is  conduct- 
ing to  the  fold  above.  Oh,  to  be  ever  looking  forward  to 
what  is  to  come!" 

"  How  sweet  and  sacred  is  broken-hearted  communion  with 
Jesus,  God's  dear  Son,  crucified  for  our  sins,  and  risen  again 
for  our  justification  !     It  is  a  mercy  of  mercies  to  be  permitted 


BROKEN-HEARTED    COMMUNION    WITH   JESUS.        405 

to  draw  near  to  Him  with  an  open,  confiding,  thougli  a  contrite 
heart — telhng  him  all  one  feels,  and  desires,  and  fears.  What 
an  inestimable  privilege  to  have  such  a  friend  always  so  near ! 
We  have  not  to  ascend  into  heaven,  nor  have  we  to  descend 
into  the  deep,  to  seek  for  Him ;  for  Ho  always  is  near,  one 
with  us,  one  in  us,  yea,  a  part  of  ourselves.  How  constantly 
is  the  Lord  seeking  to  withdraw  us  from  the  arm  of  flesh,  to  a 
more  simple  and  unbounded  confidence  in  Himself !  To  whom 
shall  we  look  ?  He  answers,  Look  unto  Me,  and  he  ye  saved, 
all  the  ends  of  the  earth  ;  for  I  am  God,  and  there  is  none  else. 
Blessed  be  God,  even  my  God,  for  every  precious  word  written 
in  that  Book  of  Books — the  Bible.  Oh,  that  it  may  be  un- 
ceasingly precious  to  my  soul.  It  is  good  for  me  to  have  been 
tried,  though  it  scarcely  can  be  called  a  trial,  since  so  sweetly 
and  blessedly  has  the  Lord  dealt  with  me  in  it.  When  I  can 
call  Jesus  mine  (as  I  can  at  this  moment,)  trials  are  no  trials. 
Yes,  Jesus  is  mine,  He  is  sensibly  near ;  and  all  I  need  and 
all  I  desire  is  in  Him,  in  comparison  of  whom  all  the  glory, 
and  honour,  and  riches  of  the  world  are  as  dross.  How 
sweetly  and  confidingly  can  I  rest  in  His  faithfulness  and  love. 
He  lives,  and  I  shall  live,  because  my  life  is  bound  up  with 
His  life.  Blessed  reality  !  Lord,  my  time  now  is  short ; 
I  would  fain  be  useful  in  encouraging  others  to  come  to  Thee, 
thou  Fountain,  3- ea,  thou  Ocean  of  living  waters,  that  they,  too, 
may  draw  supplies  from  Thine  infinite,  inexhaustible  fulness. 
Oh,  the  mightiness  of  the  privilege  of  having,  not  the  hearken- 
ing ear  only,  but  the  loving  heart  of  God  towards  and  upon  us  ! 
And  if  He  has  set  His  heart  upon  us,  making  us  His  people," 
redeeming  us  from  all  evil,  past,  present,  and  to  come,  should 
we  not  set  our  hearts  upon  Him,  and  upon  Him  only  and  con- 
fidently ?  Lord,  here  is  my  heart,  my  poor  heart ;  take  it  just 
as  it  is,  and  make  it  all  that  Thou  wouldst  have  it  to  be ;  cast 
it  into  Thy  mould,  and  let  it  receive  and  reflect  Thine  image, 
Thou  Son  of  God,  thou  inexpressibly,  precious  Jesus,  thou 
Saviour  of  sinners,  thou  Redeemer  of  my  never-dying  soul!" 

"  Oh,  that  the  Lord  would  descend,  and  give  us  a  gracious 
revival  in  our  souls,  and  in  the  congregation.  We  need  an 
especial  outpouring  of  the  Holy  Spirit.  Lord,  send  down 
gracious  answers  to  our  prayers.  Come  Thou  among  us,  and 
do  us  good  ;   for  none  but  Thyself  can  do  us  good.     Follow  the 

letter  "that  I  have   written  to  Lord with  Thy  blessing. 

Direct  in  all  our  i:)Oor  concerns.      Make  us  upright  before  Thee. 


406  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY  WINSLOW. 

Let  Thy  fear  rule,  and  Thv  love  constrain  us  to  do  Thy  will. 
Search  all  our  hearts,  and  cast  out  that  which  is  wrong  in  Thy 
sight.  May  we  live  upon  Thee,  and  for  Thee,  and  rejoice  and 
be  glad  that  Thou  seest  us  always,  desiring  to  have  no  con- 
cealments from  Thee,  our  best  and  dearest  Friend.  Be  with 
Thine  handmaid  throughout  this  day,  directing  in  all  that  lies 
before  her,  giving  wisdom  and  grace,  a  right  judgment  and  an 
upright  heart,  and  withholding  not  thy  presence.  Amen  and 
amen." 

"  Nothing  in  my  hands  I  bring, 
Yet  all  things  from  thy  hand  receive." 

"  The  apostle,  speaking  of  those  who  separated  themselves 
from  the  true  Church  of  Christ,  says.  They  went  out  from  us^ 
hut  they  were  not  of  us;  for  if  they  had  been  of  us,  they  would 
no  doubt  have  continued  with  us !  but  they  went  out  that  they 
might  be  manifest  that  they  were  not  all  of  us.  1  John  ii.  19. 
It  strikes  me,  these  are  the  real  dissentients,  those  who  separate 
themselves  from  the  church  of  God.  We  are  evidently  draw- 
ing near  the  time  which  will  mark  the  consummation  of  all 
things.  The  light  of  the  glorious  gospel  of  the  blessed  God 
will  shine  brighter  and  brighter,  and  then  will  be  more  clearly 
revealed — only  to  be  entirely  and  for  ever  effaced — the  dark 
spots  that  now  obscure  the  beauty  of  the  Lord's  church ;  and 
then  will  she,  freed  from  all  that  is  now  dishonouring  to  her 
Head,  stand  forth  a  glorious  church,  complete  in  all  her  loveli- 
ness, in  the  presence  of  a  holy  God.  Oh,  then,  let  us,  who 
really  and  truly  are  the  Lord's,  unite  together  in  bands  ot 
Christian  love  to  contend  earnestly  for  the  faith  once  delivered  to 
the  saints,  and  aim  in  all  things  to  return  to  the  beautiful  sim- 
plicity of  Christ.  Lord,  pour  out  Thy  Spirit  upon  Thy  people, 
enlightening,  healing,  and  sanctifying ;  and  hasten  the  time 
when,  coming  in  all  Thy  glory,  the  glory  of  the  Father  and  of 
the  holy  angels.  Thou  wilt  claim  Thy  bride.  Thy  one  r^  --r>]i^ 
and  present  her  without  sjjot,  or  ivrinkle,  or  any  such  thihj. 

"  Give  ear  to  my  prayer,  0  God;  and  hide  not  Thyself  from 
my  supplications.  Oh,  that  my  children  might  live  before  Thee ! 
This  is  my  daily  prayer,  that  to  the  latest  generation  they  may 
be  a  seed  to  serve  Thee.  0  Lord,  incline  Thine  ear  to 
my  request,  and  deny  me  not,  for  Jesus'  sake.  I  am  Thine, 
and  Thou  art  mine.  Jesus  has  said  it,  and  I  believe  it.  God 
be  praised  for  His  wondrous  goodness  to  me,  as  poor  and  needy 


LONGING  FOR  REVIVAL.  407 

a  sinner  as  ever  lived  ;  and  vet  I  shall  live  for  ever,  and  rejoice 
in  God  my  Saviour  through  an  endless  eternity," 

"  When  Christians  meet  together,  do  they  not  too  much  talk 
ahout  religion,  preachers  and  sermons  ?  I  cannot  but  think, 
that  if  they  communed  less  about  religion,  and  more  of  Jesus, 
it  would  give  a  higher  tone  of  spirituality  to  their  conversation, 
and  prove  more  refreshing  to  the  soul.  He  v^-ould  then  oftener 
draw  near,  and  make  Himself  one  in  their  midst,  and  talk  with 
them  by  the  way." 

"  Jesus,  Thou  art  unspeakably  precious  to  my  soul.  How 
precious,  Thou  knowest.  Do  not  I  love  Thee?  Search  my 
heart,  for  Thou  canst  read  its  every  thought  and  feeling,  and 
see  if  I  do  love  Thee.  Blessed  by  Thy  name  for  Thy  love  to 
worthless  me.  I  love  Thee,  because  Thou  first  loved  me.  / 
am  He  that  liveth  and  ivas  dead,  and,  behold  I  am  alive  for 
evermore.'^ 

" 'Tis  past -the  dark  and  dreary  night, 
And,  Lord,  we  liail  I  hee  now, 
Our  morning  star,  without  a  cloud 
Of  sadness  on  thy  brow. 

*•  Thy  path  on  earth,  the  cross,  the  grave, 
Thy  sorrows,  all  are  o'er  ; 
And,  0  sweet  thought !  Thine  eyes  shall  weep, 
Tliy  heart  shall  break,  no  more. 

**  Deep  were  those  sorrows  ;  deeper  still 
Ihe  love  that  brought  thee  low — 
That  bade  the  stream  of  life  from  Thee, 
A  lifeless  victim,  flow. 

"The  soldier,  as  he  pierced  Thee,  proved 
Mans  hatred,  Lord,  to  Thee  ; 
While  in  the  blood  that  stain "d  the  spear, 
Love,  only  love,  we  see." 

"Heaven  in  prospect  is  very  sweet  tome.  My  happiest 
moments  are  spent  in  its  contemplation.  My  soul  holds  un- 
seen communion  with  Christ  and  with  the  pure  spirits  around 
the  throne,  now  in  the  full  enjoyment  of  His  unveiled  beauties. 
I  think  I  can  behold  their  joy,  and  seem  at  times  to  be  so  near 
that  but  a  transparent  vail  separates  me  from  them,  and  that 
with  one  step  I  am  there.  I  delight  to  contemplate  some  near 
and  dear  to  me  (dearer  and  nearer  now  than  ever,)  who  have 
recently  passed  away  from  a  world  of  sin  and  sorrow.  Happy 
spirits !  ye  are  safe  at  last.  Ye  have  outrun  me  in  the  race, 
have  reached  the  goal,  and  are  at  home  before  me." 


408  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

"  Beloved  ones,  whom  i  hope  through  infinite 
mercy,  to  meet  in  heaven, 

"First  and  chiefest,  my  own  most  precious  Redeemer,  en- 
throned in  all  His  glory.  His  comitenance  radiant  with  ineffable 
love,  and  a  welcome  beaming  from  every  feature.  So  shall  I 
behold  Him  who  loved  me  with  an  everlasting  love,  and 
landed  me  at  last  in  the  kingdom  of  glory.  Then  I  shall  meet 
my  beloved  husband,  his  little  faith  at  the  eleventh  hour  saving 
him  for  ever.  Then  my  eyes  will  be  fixed  upon  my  precious 
mother,  saying  to  me,  as  she  welcomes  me  home,  '  Here,  my 

child,  the  weary  find  eternal  rest.'     And  then   dear  H , 

whose  simple  faith,  more  costly  than  the  most  splendid  gifts, 
placed  him  beyond  the  reach  of  hfe's  stormy  winds.  And  then 
will  come  dear  S and  dear  F ,  whose  sincere,  child- 
like confidence  in  Jesus  gave  them  the  victory,  and  lodged 
them  safely  within  His  arms.  There,  too,  shall  I  greet  many 
whom  I  knew  and  loved  below.  Dear  Mr.  Evans  and  his 
wife,  dear  Mr.  Whitmore,  and  a  host  of  others,  all  encirchng 
the  throne,  and  basking  in  the  full  sunshine  of  the  Redeemer's 
countenance,  while  I  shall  lie  prostrate  at  His  feet  in  wondering 
joy  and  adoring  love  at  the  matchless  grace  that  brought  me 
there.     Hallelujah!  hallelujah!  praise,  endless  praise  to  God!" 

"With  indescribable  solemnity  and  tenderness  of  feeling,  we 
thus  have  transcribed  the  last  record  of  her  journal.  It  was 
with  a  trembling  hand  we  lifted  the  vail  that  disclosed  to  other 
eyes  the  most  sacred  thoughts  and  feelings  of  her  soul.  We 
drop  the  vail — for  we  can  disclose  no  more !  Bearing  us 
through  many  years  of  daily  walk  with  God,  to  the  threshold 
of  heaven,  she  disappears  within  its  unapproachable  glory,  and 
the  last  notes  we  catch  from  her  closing  lips  are,  '  Praise,  end- 
less PRAISE  to  God !  And  then  she  laid  aside  her  harp 
below,  because  she  could  rouse  it  to  no  sweeter,  loftier  strain. 

'•  Death  darken'd  her  eye.  and  folded  her  wings, 
And  the  sweetest  note  is  the  la-it  that  she  sings." 

It  was  in  the  early  part  of  the  year  1854,  that  the  indications 
of  a  gradual  decay  of  nature  became  apparent.  To  those  who 
watched  with  wakeful  eye  each  new  symptom  of  waning 
power,  the  evidences  were  painfully  unmistakable  that  she 
was  nearing  her  long  desired  haven.  She  still,  however, 
persisted  in  attending  the  public  means  of  grace — for  she 
Moved  the  habitation  of  God's  house,  and  the  place  where  His 


LAST  SABBATH  IN  THE  SANCTUARY.      409 

lionour  d^velt' — often  when  the  state  of  the  weather  and  her 
own-felt  weakness  might  have  pleaded  her  exemption.  Her 
last  service  in  the  sanctuary  of  God  below,  was  on  Lord's'day 
morning,  July  30th.  The  subject  of  the  discourse  could 
scarcely  have  been  more  in  harmony  with  the  affecting  oc- 
casion, had  the  sad  truth  been  known,  that  her  next  minghng 
with  the  great  congregation  would  be  in  the  New  Jersualem 
above,  of  which  the  Lord  God  Almighty  and  the  Lamb  are 
the  temple.  The  text  was  selected  from  the  tenth  chapter  of 
John's  gospel,  and  the  first  clause  of  the  twenty-eighth  verse — 
"I  GIVE  UNTO  THEM  ETERNAL  LIFE."  The  Varied  aspccts  of 
the  theme, — the  glorious  truths  which  it  developed,  the  bright 
visions  of  future  blessedness  which  it  necessarily  brought  before 
the  mind,  were  well  calculated  to  afford  nourishment  for  passing 
over  Jordan.  And  so  she  acknowledged.  Returning  from 
this  her  final  public  service  on  earth,  she  expressed  in  affecting 
language  the  refreshment  her  spirit  had  experienced,  and  gave 
vent  to  her  full  heart  of  thanksgiving  and  praise  for  the 
glorious  gospel  of  Christ,  and  for  the  assured  hope  of  eternal 
life  which  it  revealed. 

As  the  sea  air — her  native  air — always  acted  upon  her  con- 
stitution like  a  charm,  it  was  hoped  that  a  few  weeks'  sojourn 
at  Brighton  would  prove  a  restorative.  It  failed,  however,  to 
realize  the  hope  cherished ;  and  finding  her  powers  rapidly 
failing,  she  expressed  an  earnest  desire  to  return  to  her  home. 
Most  grateful  was  she  to  find  herself  once  more  in  her  own 
quiet  chamber,  which  had  been  to  her  so  often,  as  she  expressed 
it,  '  a  Bethel  to  her  soul,'  the  very  walls  of  which  might  be  said 

The  quiet  chamber  where  the  Christian  sleeps, 
And  where,  from  year  to  year,  he  prays  and  weeps  ; 
Whence,  in  the  midHight  watch,  his  thoughts  arise 
To  those  bright  mansions  where  his  treasure  lies  ; 
How  near  it  is  to  ah  his  faith  can  see ! 
How  short  and  peaceful  may  the  passage  be  ! 
One  beating  pulse — one  feeble  struggle  o'er, 
May  open  wide  the  everlasting  door. 
Yes,  for  that  bliss  unspeakable,  unseen, 
Is  ready,  and  the  vail  of  flesh  between 
A  gentle  sigh  may  reud— and  then  display 
The  broad,  full  splendour  of  an  endless  day. 
Tills  bright  conviction  elevates  his  mind, 
He  presses  forward,  leaving  all  behind. 
Thus  from  the  throne  the  tyrant  foe  is  hurl'd, — 
Tliis  is  the  faith  that  overcomes  thp  world." — Jaxe  Taylor. 
18 


410  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINS  LOW. 

to  have  been  tinted  with  her  prayers.*  Sbo  Avas  not,  however, 
entirely  confined  to  her  room.  Until  within  a  few  weeks  of 
her  translation — for  such  we  must  designate  her  departure — 
she  was  enabled,  occasionally,  to  join  the  family  circle,  unite 
in  its  devotions,  and  listen  to  some  of  her  favourite  hymns  upon 
the  piano,  often  affected  to  tears  while  they  were  sung.  During 
intervals  of  her  illness,  supported  in  bed,  she  still  employed  her 
pen  in  brief,  holy  exhortations,  a  few  quotations  from  which 
are  subjoined. 

"...  Oh,  to  live  for  eternity !  To  live  to-day,  as  if  to- 
morrow we  should  be  there.  Eternity  !  eternity  !  Oh,  solemn 
thougjit !  The  eye,  the  all-searching  eye  of  God  is  upon  us  at 
this  moment.  Let  us,  then,  dear  brother,  act  for  eternity. 
May  the  constraining  love  of  Christ — the  eternal  love  of  the 
Holy  Ghost,  rest  upon  you,  keep,  direct,  and  bless  you  ! " 

In  a  solemn  entreaty  to  an  unconverted  individual,  her  love 
of  souls, — the  ruling  passion  of  her  life, — never  appeared  more 
earnest. 

"...  And  are  these  things  so,  dear  friend  ?  Yes,  they 
are.  Jesus  Christ  is  risen  indeed,  and  has  gone  up  on  high, 
and  has  opened  the  kingdom  of  heaven  to  all  believers.  Oh, 
then,  why  not  live  ?  Jesus  stands  ready  to  receive,  is  prepared 
to  welcome  you.  He  will  cast  none  out  who  repair  to  Him 
for  help  and  safety.  Oh,  I  could  stand  upon  the  housetop,  and 
cry  aloud.  Come  to  Jesus — come  now — come  at  once.  He  is 
all-sufficient  to  save,  and  is  as  willing  as  He  is  able.  In  a  lit- 
tle while,  and  whether  rich  or  poor,  high  or  low,  learned  or 
unlearned,  o?ze  thing  will  be  of  infinite  moment — your  calling 
and  election  made  sure  to  you.  Lose  no  time  in  this  great, 
this  greatest  of  all  great  transactions — the  salvation  of  your 
soul.  Delay  not,  lest  the  enemy  take  possession  of  you,  and 
you  are  lost  for  ever.      Why  luill  ye  die  f  " 

A  temporary  reviving  of  her  strength  elicited  in  a  brief  note 
to  a  friend  some  grateful,  holy  thoughts. 

"  Through  the  unchanging  mercies  of  a  good  and  gracious 
God,  I  am  yet  spared  a  little  longer  in  this  vale  of  tears.  My 
education  for  a  crown  of  glory  is  not  yet  complete.  When  it 
is,  I  shall  be  called  to  behold  Him  whom  my  soul  loveth,  and 
go  no  more  out  for  ever.  0  eternity  !  eternity !  An  endless 
life  of  never-ceasing  glory  awaits  the  feeblest  follower  of  that 
same  Jesus,  who  sufiered,  bled,  and  died  on  Calvary,  and  who 
now,  in  that  very  same  body  (though  glorified),  is  enthroned, 
prepared  to  welcome  home  the  feeblest  of  his  little  flock.     01 1, 


HOLY   COUNSELS.  411 

to  live,  while  here,  in  close  intercourse  with  Him !  This  is 
our  mighty  privilege.  Do  not  let  us,  dear  friend,  lose  sight  of 
Jesus.  Daily  intercourse  will  bring  us  more  to  partake  of 
His  lovely  likeness.  I  can  write  no  more,  my  strength  fails. 
Friends  so  kind — children  so  tender — a  little  while,  and  I  shall 
be  with  those  above,  who  are  waiting  to  bid  me  welcome. 
Realize  more  and  more  your  glorious  inheritance,  and  covet 
not  the  poor  trifles  of  time  and  sense." 

The  following  touching  and  solemn  counsels  are  supposed 
to  be  nearly  the  last  sacred  words  her  pen  ever  traced.  They 
were  written  in  acknowledgment  of  a  kind  note  of  affectionate 
sympathy  addressed  to  her  a  few  weeks  before  her  departure  : — 


TO    MISS    L- 


"  Dear  young  Friend, — 

"I  am  sorry  to  have  let  your  kind  letter  remain  so 
long  unanswered;  and  also  that  I  am  thoroughly  unable  to 
say  all  that  is  in  my  heart  to  say.  Young  travellers  to  the 
glorious  kingdom  need  often  a  little  counsel  from  those  who 
have  Avaded  through  trials  and  tribulations,  and  have  had  many 
hard  lessons  to  learn,  preparatory  to  the  full  enjoyment  of  the 
coming  glory.  Oh,  prepare  to  meet  your  God  !  A  little 
while,  and  we  pass  away — all  is  uncertain.  Oh,  to  be  quite 
ready  !  The  enemy  is  ever  on  the  alert  to  entangle  the  young 
Christian,  and  draw  him  into  sin.  Sin  darkens  the  eye,  and 
hardens  the  heart.  Keep  close  to  Jesus.  Oh,  the  compassion 
that  is  in  His  heart !  Never  more  welcome  than  Avhen  we 
come  with  an  open  heart  to  tell  Him  all  our  failures,  all  our 
sins — sins  of  omission  and  sins  of  commission.  Always  wel- 
come to  Jesus — not  a  feature,  not  a  look  in  that  blessed  face 
to  grieve  us.  '  Oh,  how  He  loves  ! '  Keep  close  to  Jesus. 
Carry  all  your  little  things  to  Him,  as  well  as  greater  matters. 
He  will  bow  His  ear,  and  listen  to  all  that  you  have  to  say. 
Let  your  walk  and  conversation  be  such  as  to  commend  Him 
to  all  you  meet  with.  Be  ye  lioly^  for  I  am  holy.  Oh,  dear 
young  friend,  I  have  been  very  ill ;  my  happy  home  almost  in 
sight !  It  looks  lovely — oh,  how  lovely !  Make  Jesus  your 
cliief  Friend,  and  look  more  to  the  things  that  are  not  seen 
find  eternal.  I  can  write  no  more,  sitting  in  bed  supported  by 
]  illows.  My  Christian  love,  to  your  worthy  father.  Oh,  may 
i   '.i'.eet  you  in  heaven !      Make  sure  of  heaven.     You  may 


412  MEMOIR    OF   MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

make  man/  mistakes  as  it  resi3ects  this  poor  workl,  but  I 
beseech  you,  make  no  mistake  as  it  respects  a  vast  eternity y 

An  unfinished  note,  inscribed  to  one  of  her  sons,  was  found 
amongst  her  last  records.  Ahnost  too  sacred  for  pubHcitj,and  yet 
too  characteristic  to  be  suppressed,  we  venture  to  subjoin  it. 
After  referring  to  her  deep  maternal  affection,  she  proceeds : 

"  This  love  emanates  from  the  love,  the  pure,  holy  love  of 
God's  dear  Son,  shed  abroad  in  my  heart.  I  know  you  will 
go  forth  and  preach  Jesus  Christ  to  poor  sinners.  I  believe 
He  will  make  you  a  blessing.  God  grant  it !  When  I  am 
gone  home,  may  you  live  long  to  do  the  will  of  the  Lord,  and 
may  I  be  one  of  the  first  to  bid  you  welcome,  when  your  work 
is  finished.  I  feel  almost  too  ill  to  write,  and  must  lay  this  by." 

It  was  but  within  a  short  period  of  her  happy  release  that 
all  hope  of  prolonging  on  earth  a  life  so  holy  and  precious, 
yielded  to  the  agonizing  conviction  that  she  w^ould  soon  leave 
us.  The  conflict  between  the  desire  for  her  full  enjoyment  of 
the  heaven  for  which  she  longed,  and  the  affection  that  would 
still  detain  her  here,  was  painfully  severe ;  nor  was  it  until  a 
few  moments  before  the  last  fetter  was  dissolved,  that  we  could 
find  it  in  our  hearts  to  comply  with  her  often-made  request, 
and  ask  of  God  to  release  her  from  her  extreme  suffering,  and 
take  her  to  Himself.*  Her  chamber  was  now  literally  the 
gate  of  heaven,  A  visitor  to  that  privileged  spot  might  have 
supposed  himself  in  communion  with  a  being  standing  v/ithin 
the  precincts  of  glory.  So  entirely  abstracted  were  now  all 
her  thoughts  from  time,  and  so  concentrated  were  they  upon 
eternal  things — so  filled  was  she  with  the  Holy  Ghost — so 
glowing  with  the  love  of  Christ — so  spiritual  her  conversation, 
and  so  tender  and  affecting  her  expressions  of  love  to  all  around 
her,  nothing  could  equal  the  tenderness  and  unearthliness  of 
the  scene.  It  pleased  God  that  her  bodily  suffering  should  at 
times  be  severe,  but  the  unimpaired  vigour,  to  the  last,  of  her 
mental  faculties  was  graciously  vouchsafed.  During  the  fevr 
months  of  her  last  illness,  as  might  be  supposed,  many  holy 
and  precious  observations  fell  from  her  Hps,  some  of  which 

*   "  Me,  let  the  tender  office  long  engage, 
To  rock  the  cradle  of  declining  age ; 
With  lenient  acts  relieve  a  mother's  breath. 
Make  languor  smile,  and  smoothe  the  bed  of  death  ; 
Explore  the  thought,  explain  the  asking  eye, 
And  keep  awhile  one  parent  from  the  sky." 

Pope  ox  Old  Age. 


DYING   SAYINGS.  413 

were  noted  down  at  the  time,  but  many  others,  it  is  to  be  re- 
gretted, were  not  preserved.  We  present  them  rather  in  a 
fi-agmentarj  and  detached  form,  than  interwoven  with  the  nar- 
rative of  the  closing  scene  : — 

"I  am  so  happy — I  cannot  tell  you  how  happy  I  am  !  Not 
a  ruffle,  not  a  cloud." 

"  Oh,  how  graciously  the  Lord  is  taking  down  the  tent,  pin 
by  pin.  What  an  eventful  life  mine  has  been !  I  have  lived 
much  in  camp,  and  have  seen  the  tents  struck,  and  the  regiment 
move  off.  Such  is  life.  Jesus  is  all  to  my  soul.  Oh,  how  I 
realize  His  presence  !  I  have  a  full  view  of  Him  at  this  mo- 
ment. Heaven  is  a  reality.  We  mystify  heaven ;  it  is  a  place. 
I  am  going  to  my  family,  and  I  shall  see  those  whom  I  ought 

to  love  as  my  family.     Dear  Mr.   E ,   and  a   countless 

throng  of  others,  as  dear  to  me  as  my  own  loved  family — or, 
who  ought  to  be,  for  they  have  been  purchased  by  the  precious 
blood  of  Jesus." 

"  I  wonder  if  we  shall  not  go  over  our  eventful  lives  in 
heaven?     I  think  we  shall." 

"  I  wish  you  to  keep  my  poor  wandering  mind  fixed  upon 
th'at  one  blessed  truth — Christ's  glorious  resurrection;  for  it 
Christ  rose  again  and  is  alive,  I  shall  certainly  rise  and  live 
with  Him  for  ever." 

Portions  of  the  15th  chapter  of  the  First  Epistle  to  the 
Corinthians  were  frequently  read  to  her,  together  with  much 
that  fell  from  our  Lord  on  the  subject  of  the  Resurrection. 

"  I  shall  enter  heaven  a  poor  sinner  saved  by  grace.  I 
seem  to  have  done  nothing  for  the  Lord,  who  has  done  so 
much  for  me."  On  being  reminded  that  she  had  been  a  faith- 
ful parent  to  her  children,  and  had  also  been  a  succorer  to 
many  in  affliction,  she  replied: — "Ah!  faithless,  faithless  have 
I  been  to  my  trust. 

"  '  Nothing  in  my  hand  I  bring, 
Simply  to  Thy  cross  I  ding.'" 

"  I  think  many  Christians  dishonour  Christ  by  refusing  to 
obey  Him.  Oh,  keep  close  to  Jesus,  and  neglect  none  of  His 
commandments.  Whatever  your  hands  find  to  do,  do  it  with 
all  your  might." 

"  Shall  soon  be  with  Jesus — shall  see  Him  face  to  face. 
Oh,  glorious  prospect !     Who  would  not  be  a  Christian  ?  " 

To  her  daughter  she  said : — 

"  Go  and  tell  Jesus  all  your  sorrows ;  keep  back  nothing 


414  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   VriXSLOW. 

from  Him.  You  will  soon  be  an  orphan,  but  remember,  you 
are  Christ's  orphan,  and  will  be  His  especial  care.  When 
your  father  and  your  mother  forsake  you,  then  the  Lord  will 
take  you  up.  When  you  feel  desolate,  remember  that  Jesus 
lives,  and  you  cannot  grieve  alone,  for  He  dwells  within  you. 
Oh,  how  have  I,  throughout  my  pilgrimage,  proved  the  Lord, 
and  ever  found  Him  faithful  to  his  promises  !  He  has  never 
failed  me  in  any  one  thing,  giving  me  more  than  He  promised, 
and  far  more  than  I  had  asked.  I  asked  Him  to  restore  you  to 
health,  that  you  might  comfort  me  in  my  old  age^  and  attend 
me  in  my  dying  hours.  What  should  I  have  done  now,  if  He 
had  not  answered  me  ?  I  am  such  a  poor  dependent  creature, 
[  cannot  think  for  myself  When  you  come  to  your  last  sick- 
ness, I  trust  and  pray  that  the  Lord  will  raise  you  up  one 
who  will  be  as  tender  a  nurse  to  you  as  you  have  been  to  me. 
May  Jesus  make  all  your  bed  in  your  sickness.  He  is  the 
best  friend  to  trust ;  He  changes  not.  Oh,  how  full  His  heart 
IS  of  love,  I  cannot  express  to  you !  And  if  I  had  millions  ot 
tongues,  I  could  not  tell  you  how  precious  He  is  at  this  moment 
to  my  soul.  I  feel  His  sensible  presence.  He  is  near  to  me ; 
so  near,  that  I  feel  as  if  I  could  embrace  Him." 

"  What  a  glorious  prospect  I  have  in  view !  Who  can 
picture  it  ?  No  tongue  can  tell  how  I  love  Jesus  ;  not  because 
it  is  my  duty  to  love  Him,  but  because  I  cannot  help  loving 
Him.  He  is  the  chiefest  among  ten  thousand,  and  the  One 
altogether  lovely." 

"  This  is  Wednesday  evening  (the  weekly  lecture).  Oh, 
may  the  Holy  Ghost  rest  upon  the  people !  Hov/  have  I 
prayed  for  the  church.  Lord,  pour  out  Thy  Spirit  upon  that 
little  flock,  and  upon ,  its  under-shepherd." 

"  Talk  to  me  of  the  glorious  Resurrection  ;  I  wish  my  mind 
stayed  upon  that  fact."  Upon  being  reminded  of  the  trans- 
porting view  Stephen  had  of  glory,  seeing  Jesus  standing  as 
if  rising  to  welcome  His  first  martyr,  she  replied,  "  Beautiful ! 
beautiful !  and  you  will  perhaps  say,  '  Mamma  thinks  herself 
of  much  importance,'  when  I  say  that  I  believe  Jesus  will 
stand  to  receive  me,  even  me.  I  am  the  chief  of  sinners,  but 
am  dear,  very  dear  to  the  heart  of  Jesus,  who  shed  His  blood 
to  save  me,  even  me,  as  if  there  were  not  another  soul  to  be 
saved."  In  this  elevated  frame  she  continued  several  days, 
frequently  observing,  that  "as  she  neared  eternity,  the  atmos- 
phere of  heaven  became  brighter  and  brighter." 


DYING   SAYINGS.  415 

That  the  enemy  should  not  allow  her  to  pass  away  unchal- 
lenged to  a  final  conflict,  is  not  surprising ;  but  it  was  permit- 
ted by  Him  who  loved  her,  only  to  render  his  defeat  the  more 
signal,  and  her  own  victory  the  more  complete.  All  one  long 
night  she  battled  with  the  foe,  and  when  morning  dawned  she 
exclaimed  : — 

"  Oh,  pray  for  me  !  pray  for  me  !  I  am  under  a  cloud.  Oh, 
what  a  night  of  conflict  I  have  passed ! — a  conflict  with  death, 
hell,  and  the  grave.  The  enemy  would  conquer  me,  if  he 
could."  She  was  reminded  that  all  these  were  conquered 
foes,  and  that  Jesus  had  promised  that  no  one  should  pluck 
His  people  out  of  His  hands.  She  replied,  "  True,  true  ;  but 
Jestis  prayed,  did  He  not?  "  The  words  were  repeated,  "  Oh, 
my  Father,  if  it  be  possible,  let  this  cup  pass  away."  She 
answered,  "  Oh,  then,  is  it  any  wonder  that  if  the  incarnate 
Grod  should  thus  pray,  I  should  feel  the  need  of  prayer  ?  It  is 
one  thing  to  talk  of  death ;  it  is  quite  another  thing  when  it 
becomes  a  reality  to  grapple  with  it.  It  is  an  easy  thing  to 
speak  of  the  war  in  the  East — perhaps  to  plan  an  attack  upon 
the  enemy ;  but  it  is  quite  a  different  thing  to  be  in  the  heat 
of  the  conflict,  the  mighty  foe  contending  with  you  foot  by 
foot.  Some  go  out  of  the  world  without  a  fear,  but  they  know 
not  and  feel  not  the  magnitude  of  sin.  To  have  one's  sins  all 
in  review  before  the  mind's  eye,  and  eternity  in  view — this  is 
a  reality,  and  it  needs  the  Trinity  to  comfort  and  support  the 
sinking  soul."  She  then  referred  to  Bunyan's  Christian  pass- 
ing over  the  river,  and  said,  "  How  long,  Lord,  wilt  Thou 
keep  me  in  the  valley  of  the  shadow  of  death  ?  Why  are  His 
chariot- wheels  so  long  in  coming  ?"  Various  passages  of  Scrip- 
ture were  read,  which  appeared  to  afford  her  much  consolation; 
to  which  she  responded,  "  The  Lord  will  comfort  me  through 
His  truth." 

It  was  delightful  to  hear  her  exclaim  soon  after : — 

"  The  gloom  has  all  passed,  and  I  have  a  full  view  of  the 
glory  that  awaits  me.     I  shall  soon  see  all  the  dear  ones  that 

have  gone  before  me.     Dear  F !     I  shall  never  forget, 

when  visiting  her  grave,  the  words  that  came  to  me  as  with 
an  audible  voice :  She  is  not  here,  she  is  risen.  You  were 
(addressing  her  daughter)  a  great  blessing  to  her,  and  you 
have  been  equally  so  to  me.  The  Lord  will  take  care  of  you. 
Thousands,  oh,  thousands  of  times  have  I  committed  you  to 
His  keeping."     On  her  asking  her  daughter  if  there  was  any- 


415  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

thing  she  could  do  for  her,  before  the  Lord  took  her,  it  was 
rephed,  only  that  she  would  pray  that  grace  might  be  given  to 
follow  her,  as  she  had  followed  Jesus.  She  answered,  "  No,  not 
as  I  have  followed  Jesus ;  for  I  have  come  so  far  short  of  His 
example.     But  I  will  pray  that  you  may  follow  Jesus  ivhollyy 

On  being  asked  by  her  daughter,  on  Lord's-day  evening, 
if  she  felt  able  to  spare  her  just  to  go  and  partake  of  the  com- 
munion, she  replied,  "  By  all  means ;  and  may  Jesus,  our 
Head,  meet  you  there,  and  speak  comfortably  to  all  His  dear 
saints.  I  shall  not  partake  of  it  again  until  I  drink  of  the  new 
wine  with  Jesus  in  our  Father's  kingdom.  There  we  shall  sit 
down  together  at  the  marriage-supper  of  the  Laml)." 

"  This  night  is  long  and  weary.  Come  and  let  us  talk 
together  of  the  better  land,  then  the  time  will  pass  sweetly. 
Oh,  how  often  has  Jesus  comforted  us  when  cast  down,  upheld 
us  when  ready  to  give  up  our  hope  !  And  when  trouble  came, 
how  often  has  He  spoken  sweet  peace,  and  delivered  us  out 
of  it  unhurt.  Oh,  to  see  Him  in  all  His  unvailed  glory,  and 
then  to  turn  and  behold  the  many  we  have  loved  in  the  flesh 
around  the  throne,  shining  bright  and  lovely  in  their  milk- 
Avhite  robes ;  Oh,  the  hope  of  heaven  !  when  shall  I  be  there  ? 
I  was  almost  in  sight  of  it,  and  brought  back  again,  seeing  my 
meetness  was  not  complete.  Even  so.  Thy  will,  not  mine,  0 
my  Father,  be  done." 

"You  must  pass  through  tribulations,  as  I  have  done.  "VYe 
require  to  be  taught  by  various  trials  that  this  is  not  our  rest. 
And  then  come  the  results — the  weanings,  the  heart-search- 
mgs,  the  drawing  of  the  spirit  nearer  to  God,  the  sweet,  encour- 
aging recognitions,  the  gracious  whispers  of  Jesus'  love.  His 
voice  saying,  '  Fear  not,  it  is  I ;  I  will  come  and  receive  you 
to  Myself,  that  where  I  am,  ye  may  be  also.'  And  then  comes 
the  last  enemy,  and  the  final  conflict ;  and  the  happy  spirit, 
freed  from  the  body  of  sin  and  of  death,  trembling  and  panting, 
is  at  the  feet  of  Jesus.  Oh,  the  bliss,  the  unutterable  bliss 
of  that  moment !  Absent  from  the  body,  it  is  present  with 
the  Lord.  Oh,  the  glory !  To  see  Jesus,  once  a  Man  of  sor- 
rows, now  enthroned ;  that  very  same  Jesus  who  was  upon 
earth,  and  who  has  often  spoken  words  of  comfort  when  others 
could  not  comfort." 

"  Lord,  I  weary,  I  weary,  I  lueary,  to  lie  gone.  Keep  me, 
patient,  waiting  Thy  will.  I  must  be  perfected  through  siiffcr- 
hig ;  not  one  pang  too  severe,  nor  one  sorrow  too  much," 


DYING   SAYINGS.  417 

*'  My  faith  is  still  strong  and  confident  that  I  shall  meet  all 
my  dear  children  in  heaven.  The  Lord  promised  to  be  a 
Father  to  my  family.  It  was  not  for  this  poor  world  that  He 
gave  me  that  promise,  but  for  that  world  which  is  to  come. 
He  is  my  Father,  and  He  will  be  my  children's  Father.  Oh, 
I  cannot  find  words  sufficiently  expressive  of  His  loving  kind- 
ness to  me.     I  enter  heaven  as  a  poor  sinner,  saved  by  grace." 

"  Kead  to  me  the  precious  words  of  Jesus.  Endeavour  to 
keep  my  mind  upon  His  truth.  Christ  is  the  Rock  upon  which 
my  feet  are  placed." 

"  Keep  close  intimacies  with  Jesus.  We  must  live  upon 
Christ,  and  we  must  die  upon  Christ." 

To  her  daughter  she  said, — 

"  A  mother's  blessing  rest  upon  you.  Oh,  what  loving- 
kindness  has  the  Lord  shown  to  me !  He  has  denied  me 
nothing.  I  have  every  comfort  I  need.  I  am  just  where  I 
would  wish  to  die.  This  room  has  been  so  often  a  Bethel  to 
my  soul.  I  have  seemed  to  commune  here  with  God  face  to 
face.     I  am  so  thankful  that  I  am  liere^ 

"  How  sweet  is  the  sympathy  of  Jesus ;  Jesus  wept  He 
mingled  His  tears  with  Mary  and  Martha,  and  yet  he  met 
Calvary  without  a  tear." 

"  Oh,  live  for  eternity  !  This  poor  world  is  passing  away; 
the  reality  is  to  come,  and  a  glorious  reality  it  is.  How  im- 
portant it  is  to  walk  so  as  to  j^lease  God  in  all  things." 

"  Little  faith  will  bring  the  soul  to  heaven ;  great  faith  will 
bring  heaven  into  the  soul." 

"  My  first  joy  in  heaven  will  be  to  see  Jesus  !  " 

"  I  am  passing  away,  but  not  a  single  cloud  veils  Christ 
from  my  view.  Language  cannot  express  how  happy,  happy 
I  am.  Words  fail  to  describe  the  preciousness  of  Jesus  to  my 
soul.  I  seem  as  if  Christ  were  beckoning  me  to  come,  saying, 
'  Why  do  ye  delay  ?     Come  up  hither !'  " 

"Your  prayers  detain  me  here." 

"It  ought  to  be  to  you  a  joyous  thought  that  I  am  going 
home — going  home!  A  welcome  home.  I  have  not  a  want, 
nor  care,  nor  trouble." 

"You  are  going  to  the  prayer-meeting;  oh,  be  faithful  to 
2wofessors.^^ 

"I  never  so  felt  my  dependence  upon  the  power  of  the 
Holy  Ghost  as  I  now  do.  I  have  not  honoured  Him  as  I 
should  have  done.  One  in  the  Godhead,  he  is  worthy  of  equal 
19* 


418  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WINSLOW. 

honour  and  praise.  The  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost  carried 
Christ  through  all  of  His  work.  In  the  saints,  it  is  first  seen 
in  quickening  and  calling  them  ;  then,  in  teaching,  sanctifying, 
and  comforting  them  all  their  journey  through.  I  repeat  it ; 
I  never  so  much  felt  my  dependence  upon  the  Holy  Ghost  as 
I  do  now.  My  first  prayer  in  the  morning  when  I  awake  is 
addressed  to  the  Holy  Spirit,  that  He  would  take  possession  of 
my  thoughts,  my  imagination,  my  heart,  my  words,  throughout 
the  day,  directing,  controlling,  and  sanctifying  them  all." 

"  Dwell  more  prominently  and  earnestly,  in  your  preaching, 
upon  the  truth  that  nothing  but  the  power  of  the  Holy  Ghost 
can  convert  the  soul." 

"  You  have  a  great  work  before  you,  and  I  shall  be  in  heaven 
to  welcome  you  home.  Be  faithful  unto  death.  My  God 
shall  supply  all  your  need,  according  to  His  riches  in  glory  hy 
Christ  Jesus y 

"Oh,  for  a  revival  of  religion!  perhaps  the  Lord  is  keeping 
me  here  to  see  it.  Wrestle  with  God  for  it.  If  there  is  a 
spot  upon  earth  more  blessed  than  another,  it  is  the  mercy-seat. 
None  can  tell  the  joy  that  springs  from  it." 

"  Few  people  are  aware  of  the  communications  that  are 
going  on  between  earth  and  heaven.  I  do  not  wish  to  be 
visionary,  but  many  such  manifestations  have  I  had." 

"  This  is  the  hour  to  test  the  reality  of  the  gospeh  It  is  a 
reality,  a  most  blessed  reality." 

"  There  is  a  service  in  heaven  for  Christ." 

"I  wish  'Praise  God  from  whom  all  blessings  flow,'  to  echo 
through  this  house  when  I  am  gone." 

"Soon  I  shall  be  singing  His  high  praises  in  heaven.  Oh, 
how  great  His  love  ?  How  can  He  love  so  vile  a  sinner  as  I  ? 
Yet  he  loves  me.  I  have  nothing  of  my  own  goodness  to 
bring  in  my  hand, — all,  all  I  cast  away." 

"  What  will  the  music  of  heaven  be  !" 

"Many  people  sa}^  to  those  going  to  another  place,  'You 
talk  so  much  about  it,  you  will  be  disappointed;'  but  oh, 
heaven  \vill  transcend  our  highest  expectations !" 

Gazing  one  evening  from  her  bed  upon  a  magnificent  sun- 
set, she  remarked,  "Oh,  if  the  outside  of  heaven  is  so  beautiful, 
what  must  it  be  loithin  /" 

"I  never  take  a  glass  of  cold  water,  but  I  think  of  Jesus' 
words — ^'I  thirst.'  Lord,  shall  I  not  weep  when  I  fix  my  eyes 
upon  Thy  blessed  face,  and  remember  that  my  sins  caused  Thy 


DYING    SAYINGS.  419 

sufferings  ?  Oh,  if  there  were  a  thought  of  my  heart  for 
which  Jesus  did  not  atone,  I  should  never  enter  heaven!" 

"I  long,  I  weary  to  be  gone;  but  I  would  not  be  im- 
patient." 

After  a  day  of  extreme  languor,  she  said,  "  The  Lord  has 
fed  me  to-day  with  drops  of  honey.  Do  not  grieve  after 
me." 

"  Note  this. — There  is  a  buoyancy,  a  vitality  in  the  principle 
of  the  renewed  soul,  which  in  dying,  cannot  be  depressed. 
The  more  the  body  decays  and  sinks,  the  higher  it  rises  to  its 
native  heaven." 

"If  ever  there  were  one  graciously,  gently,  wisely  led,  it  is 
I.  Would  that  I  had  kept  a  more  perfect  record  of  all  His 
dealings  with  me.  He  would  not  have  me  a  spoilt  child, 
therefore  He  has  employed  the  rod;  but  all  His  corrections 
and  rebukes  have  been  in  love^ 

On  her  grandson  asking  her,  if  he  should  read  to  her  from  a 
dehghtful  little  book,  entitled,  "  AYords  of  Jesus,"  placing  her 
hand  upon  her  heart,  she  replied  : — 

"  I  have  them  all  here.  The  Holy  Ghost  administers  to  me 
like  a  little  child.  My  loving  Shepherd  cherishes  the  lambs 
as  well  as  the  sheep ;  and  He  will  come  and  take  me  to  Him- 
self.    I  shall  not  go  alone.     I  want  to  go — I  want  to  go," 

"Oh,  why  are  His  chariot- wheels  so  long  in  coming?  "Why 
does  He  delay?  I  am  longing  to  depart,  to  be  with  Christ. 
All  is  real.  If  Christ  is  risen  from  the  dead,  then  I  am  safe. 
If  He  is  ahve,  then  I  shall  be  with  Him  for  ever.  I  long  to 
end  this  mortal  struggle,  and  can  truly  say — 

"  '  Jesus,  lover  of  my  soul, 
Let  me  to  thy  bosom  fly.'  '* 

On  the  draught  being  brought  to  her,  which  had  so  often 
revived  her  sinking  powers,  she  said,  "  Is  it  wrong  to  take  the 
draught  that  detains  me  here  ?  No,  it  is  not  wrong.  I  would 
not  be  impatient,  but  I  long  to  end  the  conflict,  and  be  with 
Jesus,  Oh,  how  precious  He  is  to  my  soul!"  On  the  passage 
being  repeated  to  her,  "  Our  light  affliction,  which  is  but  for  a 
moment,  worketh  for  us  a  far  more  exceeding  and  eternal 
weight  of  glory,"  she  replied,  "  Oh,  yes  !  that  glory  is  to  behold 
the  face  of  Jesus.  The  glory  of  heaven  is  Christ.  It  has  been 
a  hard  conflict  through  life  to  hold  fast  my  confidence.  Oh, 
how  far  have  I  come  short  even  as  a  professor !     But  I  rest 


420  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WIXSLOW. 

upon  the  finished  work  of  Jesus.  I  am  complete  in  Him. 
Stephen  when  dying,  in  such  painful  circumstances,  saw  Jesus 
at  the  right  hand  of  God.  That  is  a  sure  evidence  that  He  is 
alive  y 

It  was  on  Tuesday  evening,  October  3,  1854,  that  she  de- 
parted to  her  rest.  At  six  o'clock  in  the  morning  of  that  day, 
she  had  sunk  into  a  state  of  exhaustion  so  extreme  as  scarcely 
to  betray  any  signs  of  life.  Observing  the  alarm  this  produced, 
she  rallied  her  feeble  powers,  and  indicated  her  perfect  con- 
sciousness, and  recognition  of  all  around  her.  One  of  her  son3 
then  took  his  position  at  the  head  of  her  bed,  and  as  the  Holy 
Spirit  aided  his  memory,  repeated  for  three  hours  such  passages 
of  Scripture  as  were  appropriate  to  her  solemn  circumstances. 
To  nothing  were  her  quick  sensibihties  more  responsive  than 
this.  The  occasional  elevation  of  her  attenuated  hand — the 
heaven-cast  glance  of  her  dim  eye — the  soft  whisper  of  her 
faint  voice  indicated  her  felt  preciousness  of  God's  word,  and 
the  support  it  was  imparting  to  her  soul,  around  which  the  deep 
waters  were  now  swelhng.  Soon  after,  while  another  of  her 
sons  was  holding  her  hand,  she  raised  them  both,  still  retaining 
his,  and  fixing  her  ej^es  upon  his  face,  with  a  look  of  the  pro- 
foundest  solemnity  and  tenderness,  pointed  upward.  The  act 
was  too  significant  not  to  be  understood.  "Meet  me  in 
heaven !"  was  her  dying  charge.  And  then,  when  her  lips 
were  thought  for  ever  sealed — lips  that  had  testified  so  long  and 
so  faithfully  of  Jesus — she  exclaimed,  with  a  voice  of  won- 
drous energy  and  power,  "A  cloudless  death! — a  cloudless 
death ! — a  cloudless  death !"  So  resplendent  was  the  glory 
now  surrounding  her — so  sacred  and  awe-struck  the  feelings  of 
all  who  gazed  upon  the  scene — the  spot  where  the  last  conflict 
was  waging  seemed  more  like  the  vestibule  of  heaven,  than  the 
chamber  of  death.  And  now  her  oft  urged  prayer  was  an- 
swered, her  utmost  wishes  were  fulfilled ;  Jesus,  "that  very 
same  Jesus  who  once  trod  this  earth,  had  come  with  the  pale 
messenger,"  lightening  the  dreary  valley  with  His  presence, 
and  manifesting  Himself,  as  once  He  did  to  Stephen,  as  her 
own  risen,  living  Saviour,  waiting  to  welcome  her  to  her  long- 
wished-for  home.  While  her  gathered  children  were  surround- 
ing her  dying  bed,  watching  the  closing  scene,  expecting  eacli 
moment  to  catch  her  last  sigh,  her  eyes  partly  opened,  her  lips 
moved,  and  with  a  low  yet  distinct  voice,  she  rapidly  repeated 
the  words,  "I  see  Thee  ! — I  see  Thee  ! — I  see  Thee  ! — I  see 


THE    CLOSIXn    SCENE.  421 

Thee !"  The  imeartlily  grandeur  of  the  scene  transcends  all 
description.  We  felt  that  heaven  was  opened — that  Christ 
was  there — that  the  eternal  world  enclosed  us. 

"What  do  you  see,  dearest  Mamma?  "The  only  reply  was, 
'■'- 1  see,  Thee  I — I  see  Thee!  And  as  her  voice  grew  fainter 
and  fainter,  and  the  words  died  softly  upon  her  lips,  she  ceased 
to  move — a  holy  quiet  reigned — a  solemn  calm  ensued — her 
sanctified  spirit  was  in  the  bosom  of  her  Lord. 

"  The  long  yearnings  of  her  heart  Vv-ere  still'd." 

She  lay  like  a  conqueror — as  more  than  conquerer  she  was 
— surrounded  with  the  spoils  of  victory.  By  the  power  of  a 
simple  faith  in  a  living  Saviour,  she  had  wrested  the  dart  from 
the  King  of  Terrors  on  the  confines  of  the  eternal  world,  and 
death  was  swallowed  up  in  victory.  Her  countenance  was 
the  image  of  repose — the  sublime  of  tranquillity.  No  statue 
from  the  master's  hand  was  ever  chiselled  as  were  those  fixed 
and  marble  features.  From  the  mental  emotion,  the  soul-ecstasy 
through  which  she  had  but  just  passed — wrapt  in  the  vision  of  her 
living  Lord — there  still  lingered  a  lustre  in  the  eye,  a  smile 
upon  the  parted  lips,  and  a  glow,  like  that  of  sunset,  upon  the 
countenance,  which  formed  a  picture  of  inimitable  beauty  and 
grandeur. 

"  There  lived  no  trace  on  that  pale  brow 

Of  wishes  unfulfill'd ; 
The  only  hope  of  answered  prayer, 
The  calm  of  perfect  peace,  was  there, 

The  saint's  last  sleep  to  gild  ; 
'Twere  more  than  crime  to  mar  a  rest 
So  tranquil,  so  supremely  blest." 

Our  work  is  nearly  done.  With  a  deep  feeling  of  regret — 
for  the  preparation  of  the  last  few  pages  of  the  volume  has 
rendered  us  quite  unequal  to  the  task — we  relinquish  a  feature 
which  entered  into  the  original  plan  of  this  Memoir,  of  present- 
ing a  minute  analysis  of  the  Christian  character  and  experience 
it  has  attempted  to  delineate.  We  trust,  however,  the  reader 
will  have  no  difficulty  in  forming  a  just  estimate  of  the  princi- 
pal characteristics  of  its  subject,  and  of  gleaning  for  himself 
those  practical  lessons  which  may  be  learnt  from  the  history 
we  have  thus  recorded.  A  few  observations  are  all  that  we 
can  attempt  in  briefly  suggesting  those  points  which  appear  to 
be  worthy  of  especial  study. 


422  MEMOIR   OF   MRS.    MARY   WIXSLOW. 

Constituted  although  she  was  by  God  with  a  mind  of  supe- 
rior order,  and  possessing  remarkable  strength  and  decision 
of  character,  great  energy,  and  promptness  of  action,  it  yet 
will  not  be  her  mental,  so  much  as  her  spirituil  endowments, 
upon  which  the  Christian  reader  will  most  delight  to  dwell. 
The  grace  of  our  Lord  was  exceedingly  abundant  in  her,  with 
faith  and  love.  That  grace,  by  the  side  of  whose  perennial 
stream  she  perpetually  dwelt,  imparted  inspiration  to  her 
thoughts,  a  mould  to  her  actions,  and  invested  her  whole  habit 
of  life  with  a  sanctity  and  charm  indescribably  impressive 
and  heavenly.  None  but  those  w^ho  saw  her  in  all  the  rela- 
tions and  phases  of  domestic  and  every-day  life,  can  form  an 
adequate  conception  of  the  beautiful  proportions  and  exquisite 
symmetry  of  her  Christian  character  and  course.  They  alone 
could  testify  how  practical  godliness  was  exhibited,  not  in  fitful 
and  impulsive  throes,  but  as  a  principle  suffused  over  her 
whole  character,  shedding  everywhere  the  bloom  and  fragrance 
of  spiritual  life — noiseless  and  uniform  as  the  hght  of  day. 
Reader,  the  same  grace  by  which  she  was  what  she  was,  is 
alike  accessible  to  you.  By  this  grace  you  may  be  assimilated 
with  the  Divine  will,  may  be  transformed  into  the  Divine 
image,  may  be  trained  for  active  toil,  or  for  passive  endurance, 
as  was,  in  an  eminent  degree,  her  sacred  privilege.  Limit  not 
a  Divine  blessing  so  inexhaustible  in  its  resources,  and  so  free 
in  its  bestowment ;  but  out  of  the  Saviour's  fulness  receive 
grace  for  grace,  that  in  all  things  "  the  name  of  our  Lord  Jesus 
may  be  glorified  in  you,  and  ye  in  Him,  according  to  the 
grace  of  our  God  and  the  Lord  Jesus  Christ." 

Her  power  oi  faith  and  prayer — the  two  distinctive  features 
of  her  Christianity — are  suggestive  of  deep  practical  instruc 
tion.  Her  faith  was  of  the  most  simple  character,  and  in  its 
simphcity  may  be  found  the  secret  of  its  mightiness.  She  Avas 
"  strong  in  faith,  giving  glory  to  God."  She  took  Him  at  His 
word,  believing  Him  because  He  was  God.  This  childlike,  un- 
questioning faith,  purified  her  heart,  sustained  her  under  present 
trial,  enabled  her  to  triumph  over  things  seen,  and  brought  eter- 
nal realities  vividly  and  constantly  before  her  mind.  Her  faith 
honoured  God  by  believing,  and  God  honoured  her  faith  by  be- 
stowing. With  this  vigorous  grace  of  feith,  was  naturally  con- 
nected great  power  in  prayer.  She  cherished  the  most  exalteJ 
views  of  the  prevalence  of  prayer  with  God.  With  this  weapon, 
wielded  by  the  arm  of  faith,  she  felt  nothing  was  too  difficult 


COXCLUDIXG    REMARKS.  4'^  > 

of  accomplishment,  since  with  God  all  things  were  possible. 
She  was  a  woman  imgldy  in  inayer.  Apart  from  all  figure  of 
speech,  and  without  any  exaggerated  conception  of  the  idea, 
it  might  be  said,  she  literally  "  walked  with  God."  She 
seemed  to  live,  and  move,  and  have  her  being  in  fellowship  and 
communion  with  the  Invisible.  Her  habit  was, — be  the  errand 
trivial  or  momentous, — to  use  her  own  simple  and  expressive 
language,  a  continuous  "going  and  telling  Jesus."  She  remem- 
bered his  own  words,  "Without  me  ye  can  do  nothmg^''^  and 
so  she  lived,  as  a  little  child,  upon  His  guardian,  incessant 
care.  The  closeness  of  her  walk,  and  the  holy  familiarity  of 
her  intercourse  with  God  may  astonish  some,  but  so  it  was. 
She  seemed  to  have  her  home  in  His  very  heart,  and  thus  to 
have  penetrated  its  infinite  depths,  and  to  have  unveiled  its 
hidden  love  to  an  extent  startling  to  those  whose  transactions 
with  God  are  distant,  cold,  and  unfrequent.  God  was  all  in 
all  to  her.  No.  thought  nor  wish,  no  want  nor  plan,  did  she 
cherish  or  devise,  with  which  His  counsel  and  glory  were  not 
sought.  "  The  Lord  direct,"  was  always  the  calm,  submissive 
response  to  every  question  of  doubt  and  perplexity.  In  this 
impressive  feature  of  her  Christian  hfe,  how  powerfully  does 
she  speak !  Could  her  living  voice  now  be  heard  addressing 
each  tried  reader  of  this  volume,  with  w^hat  earnestness  of  man- 
ner, and  persuasiveness  of  tone,  would  she  still  say, — "  Go, 

AND  TELL  JeSUS." 

How  forcibh^  do  these  pages  illustrate  the  essential  relation 
of  strong  faith,  full  assurance  of  hope,  and  elevated  rapture  of 
pious  feeling,  with  profound  humility  of  heart,  and  an  almost 
entire  negation  of  self!  "When  Isaiah,  in  the  heavenly  vision, 
"  saw  the  Lord  sitting  upon  a  throne,  high  and  lifted  up,  and 
His  train  filling  the  temple,"  and  heard  the  seraphim  cry, 
"  Holy,  holy,  holy  is  the  Lord  of  hosts !  "  overwhelmed  by  the 
glory  of  the  Lord,  he  exclaimed,  "Woe  is  me,  for  I  am  undone  ; 
because  I  am  a  man  of  unclean  lips !  "  And  wlien  the  be- 
liever obtains  a  near  view  of  the  "  glory  of  God  in  the  face 
of  Jesus  Christ,"  he,  too,  falls  prostrate  at  His  feet,  lost  in  a 
sense  of  His  vileness.  It  is  in  the  light  of  the  Divine  coun- 
tenance the  exceeding  sinfulness  of  sin  is  seen,  and  seen  but  to 
whelm  the  soul  in  self-abhorrence.  Before  the  deepening 
glory  of  Christ,  the  glory  of  self  pales,  as  the  morning  star 
retires  before  the  ascending  sun.  The  closer  the  acquaintance 
with  Jesus,  and  the  strons-er  the  assurance  of  Divine  forgive- 


424  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY    WIN.SLO^.V. 

ness,  the  more  softly  and  lowlily  will  tlie  spirit  walk  with  God. 
"  There  is  forgiveness  with  Thee,  that  Thou  mayest  he  feared ^ 
As  the  vessel  more  heavily  laden  sinks  deeper  into  the  water, 
so  the  soul,  the  more  that  it  is  filled  with  Divine  grace,  sinks 
the  lowest  into  self-annihilation.  Almost  painfully  humiliating, 
at  times,  were  her  views  and  expressions  of  herself;  and  3'et, 
in  the  deepest,  gloomiest  vale  of  soul-humihation  which  she 
trod,  she  appeared  never  to  lose  sight  of  her  completeness  in 
Christ.     Her  5eZ/'-denial  never  betrayed  her  into  ^mce-denial. 

Let  the  ividow's  desolate  heart  be  cheered  as  she  reads  these 
pages.  They  are  the  records  of  one  who,  perhaps,  like  her- 
self, was  early  bereft  of  the  husband  of  her  youth,  and  left  to 
tread  the  remainder  of  life's  journey  in  lonely  widowhood,  and, 
single-handed,  to  rear  a  family  for  God.  Did  that  God,  the 
widow's  God,  forsake  her?  Did  any  single  promise  of  His 
word,  upon  which  He  caused  her  soul  to  hope,  fail  ?  Did  He, 
as  a  God  of  providence,  or  as  a  God  of  grace,  betray  the  con- 
fidence He  asked,  disappoint  the  trust  he  invited,  or  leave  un- 
healed the  wound,  unsoothed  the  sorrow,  unaided  the  burden, 
His  own  hands  had  made  ?  No ;  not  in  a  solitary  instance. 
Then,  all  that  He  has  been,  He  still  is,  and  ever  will  be — the 
God  of  the  widow  who  putteth  her  trust  in  Him. 

The  aged  Christian.,  too,  will  gather  much  to  encourage  her 
heart  and  strengthen  her  hands  in  God  from  the  life  under  re- 
view. A  saint  of  God,  closing  her  pilgrimage  of  toil  and  con- 
flict, in  her  eighty  first  year,  bears  her  dying  testimony,  that 
His  aged  ones  are  the  especial  objects  of  His  loving,  tender, 
faithful  care.  Lean  in  all  the  decrepitude  of  years,  in  all  the 
weakness,  pain,  and  tremulousness  of  advanced  age,  in  all  the 
fears,  misgivings,  and  becloudings  of  life's  close,  upon  this  Di- 
vine rod  and  staff.  Now  that  thou  art  old  and  grey-headed, 
thy  God  will  not  forsake  thee.  Rest  in  the  faithfulness  of 
God,  lean  upon  the  finished  work  of  Jesus,  and  hope  on  for 
the  glory  so  soon  to  be  revealed.  Let  thy  believing  ])raycr 
be,  "  Cast  me  not  off  in  the  time  of  old  age ;  forsake  me  not 
when  my  strength  faileth."  And  God's  faithful  answer  will 
be,  "Even  to  your  old  age  I  am  He;  and  even  to  hoar  hairs 
will  I  carry  you." 

How  great  the  power  and  charm  of  a  holy  life !  Such  is 
the  lesson  these  pages  impressively  teach.  The  world  is  replete 
with  beauty.  There  is  beauty  in  nature,  and  beauty  in  art, 
and  beauty  in  coimtless  forms ;   but  there  is  no  beauty  like 


COXCLUDIXd    REMARKS.  425 

"  the  heauty  of  holiness^  The  brightness  which  gleams  through 
a  good  man's  Hfe  outshines  the  sun  in  its  meridian  splendour. 
The  world,  too,  is  mightj  in  its  forces.  There  is  the  power  of 
intellect,  and  the  power  of  learning,  and  the  power  of  genius, 
and  the  power  of  wealth,  and  the  power  of  rank ;  but  there  is 
no  power  so  commanding  and  so  effective  as  the  power  of  holi- 
ness. The  power  it  wields  is  omnipotent  for  the  achievement 
of  good.  And  a  more  precious  and  enduring  legacy  parental 
affluence  and  affection  cannot  bequeath  to  posterity,  than  the 
record  of  a  life  traced  bj  the  sanctifying  influence  of  faith,  the 
achievements  of  prayer,  and  the  adornments  of  holiness.  Such 
a  life  is  a  living  demonstration  of  the  Divinity  of  the  Bible, 
and  does  more  to  confirm  its  veracity,  and  spread  its  truths 
through  the  world,  than  all  that  has  ever  been  spoken  or  writ- 
ten on  the  evidences  of  Christianity. 

How  measureless  the  loss  of  such  a  saint  of  God  !  To  her 
family  and  friends,  to  the  church  of  Christ  and  the  world,  the 
withdrawal  for  ever  from  earth  of  her  living  piety  and  fervent 
prayers,  her  holy  conversation  and  consistent  example,  is  a 
serious  and  far-reaching  calamity.  And  yet  she  still  hves 
amongst  us,  not  in  our  hearts  and  memories  only,  but  in  the 
undying  influence  of  her  holy  life.  "  The  righteous  shall  be 
had  in  everlasting  remembrance."  The  grave  hides  them  from 
sight,  but  not  from  memory.  Neither  the  green  turf  nor  the 
salt  wave  can  bury  the  still  surviving,  and  still  moulding  recob 
lections  of  the  holy  dead.  In  the  embalmed  remembrance  of 
their  graces,  their  prayers,  and  their  actions,  they  still  live  to 
guide,  to  stimulate,  and  cheer  us  in  our  homeward  march. 
Nor  do  we  cease  to  live  with  them  !  They  remember  and 
love  us  still.  Bearing  their  friendships  with  them  to  the  skies, 
purified,  subhmated,  and  enlarged,  they  yet  think  of  us,  vearn 
over  us,  and  long  to  have  us  with  them  there,  with  a  tender- 
ness of  interest,  and  an  intensity  of  affection,  such  as  thev 
never  felt  on  earth.  For  aught  that  we  know,  they  still  hover 
arovmd  our  persons,  encompassing  our  path  to  the  abodes  of 
bhss.  Angels  are  ministering  agents  to  the  heirs  of  salvation ; 
and  may  we  not  suppose  that  many  of  the  glorified  spirits  of 
"just  men  made  perfect"  are  clothed  with  a  like  embassv  ? 
"  They  serve  Him  day  and  night  in  His  temple ; "  and  who 
will  say  that  it  does  not  enter  essentially  into  that  service  for 
the  Lord,  to  administer  in  some  unknown  way  to  their  former 
companions  in  tribulation,  and  the  expectant  sharers  of  their 


426  MEMOIR    OF    MRS.    MARY   WINSLOW. 

gloiy?  But  until  we  rejoin  them  in  the  home  of  the  Father, 
we  should  think  of  them  but  to  follow  their  holy  example,  to 
gather  encouragement  from  their  faith  and  patience,  to  learn 
lessons  from  their  failings,  and  to  take  up  and  carry  forward 
the  work  of  the  Lord,  which  dropped  from  their  dying  hands, 
until  we,  too,  are  summoned  to  rest  from  our  labours,  and  re- 
ceive our  reward. 

Such  is  her  happiness,  whose  sacred  memorials  we  close. 
She  has  reached,  at  last,  the  heaven  of  glory,  for  which  her 
panting  thoughts  and  heaving  heart  so  yearned.  She  has 
looked  upon  Christ,  whom  her  soul  adored  with  an  affection  so 
a1)sorbing  and  intense — has  seen  angels,  and  talked  with  those 
she  once  knew  and  loved  below.  And  now  she  feels  that  all 
indeed  is  true  !  Mysteries  which  the  hoary  sages  of  antiquity 
should  never  know, — glories  which  the  human  eye  could  never 
see, — joys  which  human  thought  could  never  conceive, — and 
music  such  as  earth  never  heard,  have  burst  upon  her  wonder- 
ing, blissful  spirit.  At  His  feet,  who  died  for  her,  and  who 
rose  again,  adoringly  she  casts  her  crown,  exclaiming,  "Wor- 
thy IS  THE  Lamb  ! "  Ascribing  to  the  Triune  Jehovah — as 
we  now  devoutly  do — the  praise  and  the  glory  of  all  that  she 
was,  as  a  partaker  of  life  in  Jesus,  we  will  rejoice  that, 
through  His  sovereign  grace,  she  "  fought  a  good  fight,  finished 
her  course,  kept  the  faith ; "  and  that  now — 

She  is  gone  to  the  mountain  of  myrrh,  and  to  the 

HILL  OF  frankincense,  UNTIL  THE  DAY  BREAK,  AND  THE 
SHADOWS    FLEE   AWAY. 


THE     END. 


